Welcome back to the Vetinari Dualegacy! This is Chapter 21: Love Is a Temple, and officially marks the beginning of Gen 7's tenure as heirs!

Last time, college finished up with Bucky and Fair throwing down, Bell going PermaPlat, Meadow confronting Eddie about his treatment of her, Tess and Whitney finding boyfriends, and engagements galore. Also, Kate continued to bug me.

But before we get to the main houses, we'll pop in and see what the spares have been up to...

“Mal, I know he's not your favorite person, but I'd like you to consider forgiving your brother.”

“I've considered it. Just not interested in it.”

“He's still family. And when you can't count on anyone, you can count on family.”

“Except that I can't count on Eddie, Dad. He's already proven that.”

“He made a mistake. He feels badly about it. Didn't he apologize?”

“Sure, and then Meadow told us all what he did to her. Doesn't that make you even the slightest bit angry?”

“Of course I don't condone what he did. I don't think he's proud of it either. And whatever he did was for nothing.”

“So that makes it okay?”

“No. But maybe you should consider that he's suffering enough from his failure. He's the only brother you've got left, and I hate to see you estranged.”

“All right, Dad. You win. I'll invite him to the wedding and I'll even play nice. But I'm inviting Meadow too, and I can't promise that she will.”

“Fair enough. Although I hope she won't make a scene for your sake. I'd hate to have your wedding go down as 'that one where the bride's brother and a former Dormie got into a screaming match when they served the cake'.”

“I suspect Max wouldn't enjoy that much, either. If Eddie behaves, I'm sure Meadow will.”

“Hey, Mal. Um... Nice crown.”

“It's a tiara.”

“Right. I knew it was one of those.”

“Crowns go all the way around.”

“...Is it going to be this awkward between us forever?”

“Dad asked me to think about forgiving you. And I am. Thinking about it, I mean. If it helps, I'm at least not furious with you any more.”

“I guess that's a step in the right direction. I really am sorry.”

“I know. Meadow's around here somewhere; try not to get into any fights, will you?”

“Believe me, that's the last thing I want to do.”

“Meadow. Truce? I'd wave a white flag if I had one.”

“I'm not going to start anything at your sister's wedding. You are safe. For now.”

“Okay then, I'm going to apologize again and say that you were right. I didn't treat you like I should have. I used you, and I shouldn't have, and I'm sorry. I was so focused on getting what I wanted that I never stopped to think about who would get hurt, and that was you, and I honestly didn't mean for it to happen.”

“That doesn't make it all right.”

“I know it doesn't. I know I seriously messed up. You deserve better than that.”

“You were pretty charming when you wanted to be.”

“You made it easy to be charming. Who wouldn't want a pretty girl to kiss them?”

“I don't think many people would call me pretty, Eddie.”

“Their loss. ...I think the ceremony's getting ready to start. We should go watch.”

“I, Max Flexor, promise to be thoroughly awesome, and to make grouchy faces at whoever needs to have grouchy faces made at them, and to leave my messes around for you to clean up, and to adore you forever, and did I mention the 'awesome' thing?”

“I, Malcolm Landgraab V, promise to happily clean up after you, let you throw as many parties as you want, and stalk you all over the house when I'm in need of a kiss.”

“Well yay.”

And with that, Max Flexor becomes Max Landgraab.

Max is also a bit of a cake-shover, so it's probably a good thing Mal loves him too much to mind.

Anyway, here are a bunch of the guests. That's Mal's cousin Didi right in front, because you know Family Sims love weddings, Whitney in the blue, Mal's Uncle Gil, Didi's husband Nolan, and her Aunt Banyan. Also you can see little bits and pieces of Tess, Fair, Malcolm IV, and Meadow.

Due to the “Gilbert's a Romance Sim!” stuff, there really aren't a lot of shots of the guests. Amusingly, Nolan is still very suspicious of Gil, and won't go away if Gil and Didi are talking.

Mal went PermaPlat fairly soon after the Roof Raiser wedding party. The knit cap definitely does not go with the low-cut minidress.

Max proved his awesomeness time and again during Mal's pregnancy. He'd Serve meals instead of just cooking for himself, and even go in for autonomous backrubs.

Plus, they never lost any of that stalkiness. If they were both awake, they were more or less inseperable.

Except for when Mal went into labor, of course, and then Max was nowhere to be found.

Everything went off without a hitch, though. This is little Eleanor. She's a Scorpio 7/6/10/3/3. She mostly takes after Mal and Sycamore when it comes to looks.

And this is Malcolm Landgraab VI. Six is a boy. I promise. He's blonde because I went in and gave Max some recessives, just to keep things interesting. Six also looks like Max, but his personality's more like Mal's—he's a Virgo.

While Sycamore chats with Sheldon, Max comes home from work PermaPlat. This is good, because now they can double-team the toddler training.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I love other people's Evil Malcolms, but mine soooo isn't. He is a big squishy teddy bear who adores his kids and grandkids. Ellie wanted attention, so of course it was Grandpa to the rescue!

Before long, the kids are all grown up. This is Six, and you can really see his dad's features in him. And also his mom's tidiness. Virgo 10/3/10/2/3. Nothing in this house will ever be dirty again.

Ellie is more concerned with eating food than cleaning it up. And trust me, this is just how Mal and Sycamore looked when they were kids.

Now that we have kiddies here, we can move on...

Indy happened to wander by Bucky and Fair's, so I sent Fair out to say howdy. I used Macro... Socialize... Friendly to make sure that Fair didn't act like Fair.

As soon as Macrotastics clicked off, Fair acted like Fair and picked a fight with Indy, who was not amused. I sent Indy away before blows could be thrown.

I like Fair, but he is a LOT OF WORK. If you do not watch him every second he's awake, he will find new ways to get into trouble.

Bucky and Fair have reached entente, though. They are no longer following each other around with crabby expressions and flamey-thought-balloons.

Fair gets PermaPlat first, mostly because Bucky wanted to top Business, and it refused to come up in the job listings.

Fair goes PermaPlat twice over by maxing all his skills. Then he was annoyed when I dragged his Cooking skill down one so he wouldn't make lobster every time he got the slightest bit peckish.

In case you were wondering, I mostly achieved Fair and Bucky's cease-fire by giving Fair his own “apartment” on the second floor of the house, through a door that only he can go through. When he's bored, he can wander downstairs and play video games, and when he's had enough of other people, he can go back upstairs and do his own thing. He's even got his own little kitchenette up there, and a table with one chair.

Finally, I remembered about the Career Flamingo mod, got Bucky his job, and he went PermaPlat quite easily.

Meadow is also PermaPlat. She's living in a nice little house near a bunch of the other spares.

Meadow's right up the road from Connor and Stacie, in fact.

Stacie is Stacielee, who writes Whedonberry.

Connor doesn't need a lot of encouragement to be romantic. Especially with the prospect of a wedding party on the horizon.

The wedding party was an amusing mix of SimSelves and Connor's friends and family, and made Roof Raiser with plenty of time to spare.

“So, uh, I'm just gonna throw parties and sit in the hot tub naked. You okay with that?”

“I think I might be, yes. As long as there can be kiddies.”

“New people to meet? I'm in!”

My skills with throwing wedding parties has not gotten any better. Everything took place during the day, right up until they went in for the kiss. Then, yay darkness!

Connor, unsurprisingly, is a cake-shover.

Stacie, unsurprisingly, doesn't care that he's doing it.

Connor goes PermaPlat the next day.

Stacie does not go to work due to being pregnant. Connor tries to make friends with his unborn progeny.

Stacie is a great pregnant Sim. Pretty much no barfiness, no insane motive drain... Plus cute babies!

This is Kaylee, who's a 4/10/8/5/8 Aries. Yet another in a long line of naked hot-tubbers stretching all the way back to Raven's husband Tom.

Grandpa Naked Victor is holding Inara. She's a Pisces 4/1/9/5/6.

Yes, I have one naked hot-tubber, and one who doesn't even want to take her clothes off to take a bath.

So it's probably a good thing that outgoing Kaylee's the one to witness her father telling Grandpa Naked Victor a Dirty Joke.

Three generations of nudists ahoy!

Inara is much happier where people enjoy the wearing of clothes. Stacie is never too busy for playing and snuggles.

Stacie goes PermaPlat too.

And then goes into Education for the Magical Bookshelf of Awesomeness.

After toddler training and birthdays, this is Kaylee all grown up.

Inara also grows up cute. I look forward to seeing them come home with the other kids.

Carver doesn't have any kids, though. Just a bathtub to play in.

OK, he also has a bowling alley out back and a couple of Romance Sim neighbors.

He does go on frequent dates with Brooke, though.

Carver goes PermaPlat, and goes on another date with Brooke to celebrate.

Brooke goes PermaPlat, and asks Carver on a date to celebrate.

“So can we have expensive statues and expensive paintings and expensive bars and expensive living chairs?”

“Only if we can also have expensive TVs and expensive stereos and a DJ booth and a shrub!”

“...And babies?”

“Er... Okay.”

Baz and River's wedding went off without a hitch.

Baz is not a cake-shover. This was somewhat of a surprise.

I missed the +25000 doodad, but Baz is PermaPlat now. River was stuck like Bucky, where her job just wasn't coming up, but I didn't care so much, since she wouldn't be able to go to work anyway.

River's pregnant, and Baz shows some definite “Larch” tendencies about the proceedings.

Baz and River are looking forward to their little childrinion.

The childrinion is Brett, who has THE official Vetinari personality: Aries 10/10/9/3/1. He also looks like a Vetinari.

It's safe to say that Brett is never lonely. If he's awake, there's always someone around to keep him occupied.

I Career Flamingoed River into her dream job, and she went PermaPlat.

Baz is always ready to play with Brett. Even in the middle of the night, when he's half-asleep.

This is mostly here to remind everyone that Brooke is still alive. She's less in-your-face than most of them, so there aren't a lot of shots of her. There aren't a lot of shots of Kate either, but, you know, I like Brooke. So have a picture with Brooke in it.

Brett has earned the right to wear the fauxhawk. Those are Grandma Pen's blue eyes he has, but the rest of that face is Baz.

Grandma Pen is Penguingirl0384, who writes the Penguino Legacy.

Speaking of Kate, she wanted to interact with family members, so I had her invite her parents over, and they spent most of their time stalking each other and avoiding Kate, which made me laugh.

This made me laugh too. Kate was taking a shower, and Reed came in, used the toilet, and flushed, and Kate jumped out of the shower and Lectured him. Reed didn't care, but I laughed, because it happened to Kate.

Anyway, Kate is PermaPlat now, and will subsequently be ignored. Yay!

Also going PermaPlat off of a Captain Hero LTW is PurpleBunny, Bell's fiancee. Bell, as you will remember, is already PermaPlat off of 50 Dream Dates in college.

PurpleBunny writes the Piratical Legacy and the Sim Spade stories.

Bell and PB have a lot of friends between them, so the wedding party was packed full of people, including SimSelves and Bell's friends and family.

Everyone agreed that Connor and Whitney were Popularity Sims and Rizzo was a Romance Sim.

“Will there be babies?”

“Well, there sure as heck won't be any more dates!”

“...Honestly, I have no problem with that.”

“Honestly? Neither do I.”

How ironic—there's rain on their wedding day.

Oh, wait. That's not ironic at all. Carry on.

If you don't understand that, GET OFF MY LAWN, YOU YOUNG WHIPPERSNAPPER!

I kid, I kid.

PB is not such a fan of the cake-shoving. She makes the most amazing cranky faces on occasion.

I imagine Bell has no idea how close he came to a Smiting.

See? There's a Lot Debugger, all ready to go.

Also PB is giving birth. I guess that's sort of important too.

This is Wydah, who looks like a mini-Bell. She's a nasty little Sagittarius 2/3/9/10/1. Shy, mean, and playful. She's gonna be fun!

This is Edmund Fitzgerald. He's also a Sagittarius, but 4/8/9/9/5. Finger-guns!

Yes, I named PB's kids after shipwrecks. It seemed to fit.

It's not too much of a shock that PB likes to spend time with the kids, but Bell's pretty good about getting to know them too. Wydah is definitely Daddy's Little Girl.

Of course, he's not above giving Edmund Fitzgerald tickles either.

Wydah definitely takes after Bell and Rizzo when it comes to appearance.

Edmund Fitzgerald looks more like PB.

And yes, I will pretty much always be calling him Edmund Fitzgerald, because it makes me hum “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” and that makes me giggle. I mean, not the song itself, because it's a depressing song, but the fact that I get the earworm.

The last of the spare-types is Billy, who got engaged to Toast once he left college. I remembered that they weren't actually married yet, so I had him ask her to move in and throw a party.

Toast has some SimSelf friends, and Billy has a strange social circle, and once people showed up with their “plus-ones” it was a bit of an odd crowd.

But Simon was a guest, so at least there was someone nice to look at. OK, and Connor. And Becca was there.

“Can we go jump on the couch now?”

“Not yet.”

“Pillow fight?”

“I think we gotta do something first.”

“Oh, right.”

“Now pillow fight?”

“Cake!”

Billy's another cake-shover, although he might just be trying distract Toast from Chester Gieke's buttcrack. Untucked pants + Tucked shirt = YIKES.

THEN it was time for pillow-fighting.

I sort of feel like having a baby would cramp their style, so they get to remain childless. I don't think they mind.

Billy goes PermaPlat and immediately rolls the Want to quit his job, which I let him do, because I give him pretty much anything he asks for.

Toast goes PermaPlat, but does not roll the Want to quit. She Wanted a date instead, so she got one of those.

At the end of the date, they get all snuggly. Toast does love her an alien with a nose.

Toast is EphemeralToast, who wrote the Apocalypso-A-Go-Go.

These two are the perfect Pleasure Sim couple.

Although Billy would probably appreciate it if Toast didn't help him rake the yard.

Toast would probably appreciate it if Billy didn't attempt to regiment the leaves, which are much happier being freed from their confining piles.

And now, to the Prettacy!

“I'm pretty and I finger-gun. And I want to throw a wedding party.”Duly noted.

Whitney Vetinari (Sagittarius 2/9/9/10/5; Popularity) is the Gen 7 Prettacy heir. Her LTW career came up in the paper right away, and she is set to start Gen 8. Well, as soon as she gets married to her fiancee, of course.

One phone call and a quick invite later, Artie joins the household and sets about getting to know his future in-laws, which does not go any smoother than getting to know her brothers.

“They have lots of expensive stuff!”And three-quarters of a million bucks in the bank.

Arthur Schuster (Scorpio 6/5/7/3/4) is a Fortune Sim with recessive genes and the LTW to be a Criminal Mastermind. His Wants tend to be very Fortune Sim-y, and if I let him have his way, there won't be a patch of ground without a shrub on it by the time he's done. Still, he loves Whitney and she loves him, and he'll be happy enough as long as I Buy Him Expensive Crap.

Rizzo and Zoe are still stalky and adorable. Rizzo is showing his stealth Family side; he got Aspiration when Bell got married, and he's rolled the Want for another family member to get married, and he's got a big fat Grandbaby Want that doesn't seem to be going away any time soon.

Whitney Wanted a wedding party, and Rizzo Wanted a married family member, so it was Big White Arch time!

“Whitney, not even the dead leaves on the ground can make me feel sad on this day, because we're getting married! But seriously, don't you have a gardener? Can we hire one?”

“We have a gardener. And also someone with the wedding-throwing skills of a wildebeest.”

“Bummer.”

“Yeah, well, it's daylight and not winter, so at least we've got that in our favor.”

“Whitney, I swear to provide you with genetic variation and lots of shrubs. Because who wouldn't benefit from some judicious landscaping?”

“Arthur, I swear to provide you with endless funds for your landscaping, and some kids. Who we will not be selling into slave labor.”

“I never suggested that.”

“I'm just sayin'.”

Arthur Schuster is now Arthur Vetinari.

And yes, as has been pointed out to me, he does not have the Heather/Beth face, he has the Lucy Hanby face, but whatever, I played around in CAS and got some cute kids out of the deal, so I am unconcerned. Plus, I stared at Stabby Death Nose for five generations, and at the most, I'll only be staring at The Mouth for three, so, bonus.

There were actually more people than Rizzo, Fair, Bucky, and Zoe at the wedding. Tess and Bell didn't make it off the porch, and of course Carver was there, and Uncle Tolly, and a bunch of the college crew. They just didn't show up until there was cake.

And see how happy Rizzo and Zoe are that Whitney got married? Because it's all about keeping Rizzo happy.

“Hahaha! You have cake in your nose!”

“Oh, there will be cake in other places if I have anything to say about it.”

“Hooray for cake!”

“OH EM GEE my sister is kissing her husband! FOR SHAME!”

“I KNOW RIGHT?”

“HOW COULD WE LET THIS HAPPEN?”

“I DON'T KNOW.”

“WE ARE HORRIBLE BROTHERS.”

Whitney and Artie leave her traumatized brothers standing in the kitchen and head off for some post-nuptial barnyard noises.

“Do you think I could convince Carver or my brother to get married? Or my cousin Becca? I like watching family members get married, but I think I'm running out.”

“Hold your horses, Romance Boy. There will be more grandchildren soon enough.”

“I'd like to hold your horses, pretty lady.”

“I just might let you.”

Whitney comes home from work PermaPlat, and then goes and barfs because she's still in the first day of her pregnancy.

She is now The Law. Apparently, The Law is now “MORE PARTIES.”

Never one to let an early snowfall stop him, Rizzo invites over Bell and his kids, so he got to have some fun-time with Wydah and Edmund Fitzgerald in the snow.

I am keeping a close eye on Whitney while she's pregnant. The post-rebuild ghosts all tend to come inside, and there are quite a few of them now.

This happens to be Topher, cheering for his old bed. Fortunately, he didn't wake anyone up this time.

Tom, on the other hand, showed no mercy. This was the third scare on Whitney that night, but there wasn't too much motive depletion, so a quick trip to the potty set her right again.

During her waking hours, Whitney worked on her novel next to a snapdragon.

What with spending so much time in the living room, it's no surprise that that's where she went into labor.

Rizzo rushed to her side, helpfully demanding GRANDBABY NAO.

“Oooh, hey, Meet Someone New! And also, OW.”

“Grrraaaannnnndbaaaaabyyyyyyy!”

This is Sawchuk, with his daddy's blonde hair and his mommy's eyes and skintone.

“Who's my little grandbaby? You are! You're my little grandbaby! Who loves his grandpa? You do! Boogyboogyboogyboogy”

“Can I give him a bottle and take a nap now, Dad?”

“Grrrrraaaaannnnnndbaaaaabyyyyyy.”

“Well, at least I won't have to worry about him being starved for attention.”

*braaap*

Chuck is widely adored, and even Artie takes time out of his busy day of skilling to change a diaper and cuddle the baby.

This is Renee, the current Prettacy cat. Her siblings were sold to Prof and Flavius.

She has a tendency to pick fights with the stray dogs and win.

On Chuck's birthday, Rizzo gets to do the honors, and he's thrilled about it.

Of course, he does have the occasional Romance Sim Moment.

Seriously, though, he Wants another grandbaby.

Chuck looks like a carbon-copy of Whitney, as far as I can tell. Not sure about the brow, though. Might be Artie's brow. He's an Aries 6/9/7/3/5. Another finger-gunner!

Rizzo actually rolled the Want for this. I am going to miss him so much when he's gone.

Zoe rolled the Want to teach Chuck to talk, so she got to do some toddler-training too. She's a Knowledge Sim, though, so it's not so odd for her to want to teach toddler skills.

With one baby done, Artie and Whitney successfully tried for a spare.

Normally I space pregnancies out a bit more, but Rizzo just loves his grandkids so much, I want him to have as much time as possible with them.

I mean, could you say No to this guy, getting all snuggly with his wife in the nursery? Could you?

I didn't think so.

With the heavy lifting out of the way, Whitney chills out with Chuck and they discuss how great the rabbit head is.

However, nothing beats Grandpa Tickles!

Here is proof that Whitney finished her novel and went on a Dream Date with Artie.

She's probably happier about the novel, but I could be wrong.

Oh, Rizzo. Never change.

“Artie?”

“Yeah?”

“Baby.”

“What, honey?”

“BABY!”

“Oh, right, that kind of baby!”

“Yes, the actual kind, and not the pet name!”

“I'll just stand here and look shocked, shall I?”

“Could I stop you?”

“No.”

“This seriously does not get any less ouchy!”

“Please let it be a shrub!”

“Grrrraaaaannnnnndbaaaaaaabyyyyyy!”

Amidst gasps and yelps from the menfolk, we have Lindsay!

She has the same coloring as her brother. Wheee.

Artie's pretty good about not minding diaper-changing, so he gets roped into a lot of it. Afterward, there is always baby-cuddling.

Artie may not have a very well-developed sense of self-preservation, though. He spent a bit too long on the bubble blower, and winter started in mid-fall and ended at summer, so it may have said Spring, but it wasn't all that temperate.

He did eventually warm up.

Just, you know, not like this.

Rizzo kept setting fires, and Lobster Thermidor was always responsible, so I cheated him down one Cooking point, and now he can't leave the lobster in the oven and wander away.

It's OK, though. I cannot hate him. He is far too awesome to hate.

Yes, and Zoe too.

She still works nights as a Mad Scientist, so her sleep schedule's somewhat off from everyone else's, so she's not always up and about when the rest of them are doing interesting things. But she's very much an important part of the household.

Artie works odd shifts too, and he's the only one around when Chuck grows up.

I finally remembered that I didn't have to “cake” toddlers; they can just grow up on their own, and then I don't end up with eleventyseven birthday cakes in someone's inventory that have one piece out of them, that end up being thrown out on the counters at parties at college, so that guests can enjoy pizza and a slice of that cake from when someone's grandma grew up two generations ago.

Artie's monster skillathon pays off when he goes PermaPlat. And now I never have to buy him another shrub.

Rizzo seems happy that Chuck is now old enough to do more interesting things.

Chuck talks about the environment. Chuck is more serious than his admittedly-already-low 3 Playful points would indicate, and I'm not sure maxed-Playful Rizzo quite knows what to make of him.

Chuck just seemed to need glasses, the serious little dork. And that's definitely Whitney's mouthhe's sporting.

Zoe was the one who got roped into teaching him how to do homework, probably because he didn't trust anyone else to give answers other than “WooHoo and Grandbabies!” “A shrub!” or “Friends and parties!”

If Chuck rolls a Social Aspiration, I will cry.

This was autonomous. I <3 them so much.

Whitney gets to do the honors on Lindsay's birthday.

Lindsay looks exactly like her brother and has the same personality: Aries 6/9/7/3/5.

Clones.

Great.

Good thing Rizzo Wants another grandbaby, because he's going to get one!

STOP BEING AWESOME. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS WHEN YOU DIE AFTER BEING AWESOME?

Whitney gets to teach Linds to talk, in the traditional location in front of the potty, within easy reach of the snapdragon.

However, before she can teach Linds to walk, Whitney pops into her second trimester.

Luckily, Whitney is a pretty low-maintenance pregnant Sim, so aside from the ghosts, I don't have to micromanage her too much.

Linds even manages to snag Renee for some cuddles. Chuck never managed to do that.

Still, she's smart enough to know who gives the best cuddles around.

A pregnant Whitney is still Whitney. When I can't find her, I just check the bathtubs!

But we will leave Whitney to her tub-pirating and head to the Uglacy...

“Marco! I think this one's for you!”It's not the first, and it won't be the last.

Tesla Vetinari (Pisces 10/3/10/1/10, Grilled Cheese) is the Gen 7 Uglacy heir. The nicest one of her generation, with five times as many Nice points as her three brothers combined, she has nevertheless proven to have the Vetinari toughness.

“No, go ahead, you keep the smelly letter.”Just make friends with the werewolf.

Marconi Vetinari (Taurus 7/7/6/10/2, Pleasure) is Tess's older brother and the Uglacy Black Sheep. He's half-alien and a vampire, and is working on Baxter the Alpha Werewolf. His LTW is 50 First Dates, and he's over halfway there.

“Wanna move in?”

“Righteous.”

“I don't like the gold book. I feel like it's a tool of The Man.”I don't like your Townie level of skills. Guess who wins.

Brad “the Hippie” Cooper (Virgo 8/3/6/3/5, Popularity) is Tess's intended husband. He's a cloned version of one of the Ottomas twins, and the beard is there because there is not enough eye-bleach in the world.

“So, Tess, will you accept this outmoded symbol of traditional relationship commitment, and marry me?”

“Outmoded but pretty!”

“Is that an answer?”

“Yes is an answer! Only you'll have to take my last name!”

“I have no problem sticking it to The Man.”

Essentially, I tried to throw a wedding party, and the option refused to come up, and then it occurred to me that I hadn't actually gotten them engaged yet, so once I did that, I could throw the party, but I'd already invited a bunch of the people over. I still waited until after dark to invite the rest of the guests, just so Marco didn't self-immolate.

“Grilled cheese!”

“Hooray!”

“Do not talk to me of cheese, bleh.”

As usual, most of the guests were busy elsewhere during the actual ceremony. Bucky, Fair, Brooke, Carver, Bell, Mal, and Scott were hanging around somewhere.

“Bleh!”

“No.”

“Bleh?”

“No!”

“Are you sure we're not supporting The Man by getting married in the first place?”

“Oh, I don't really know who The Man is, but I know who my brothers are, and I'm fairly certain that if I get pregnant and we're not married, no one will ever find your tombstone.”

“I suppose The Man can win once in a while.”

“Tess, I promise to fight the Establishment and--”

“Is this going to be about The Man some more?”

“Yes?”

“Just put on the ring and kiss me.”

“Okay.”

She's nice, but she's not too nice.

Brad was smart enough not to cake-smash. Marco was keeping a close eye on him.

After the party, Brad and Tess retreated to the bedroom for something her brothers most certainly would not approve of.

Especially Fair, since he doesn't seem to get the appeal.

Actually, Tess will get her Demented Purple Hearts before Marco. He's had lots of dates, but none of them have actually lasted long enough for Demented Purple Hearts.

Speaking of Marco...

Here's Aphrodesia!

Haha, no, just kidding, here's Marco...

Marco has finally turned to the Gypsy Matchmaker for dates. Jwoodsbuzz's SimSelf takes one for the team. Of course, the Matchmaker leaves between 11pm and midnight, which gives Vamp Marco a very narrow window for dating. Then he heads to the backyard to Wish For Friends, whom he then dates.

And he also keeps an eye out for Baxter the Alpha Werewolf, because he still needs to make friends.

Have a montage of Marco's nights!

“Bleh! This is my last First Date! Make it a good one! Or else. Bleh.”

“Awesome. My 'almost perfect' match is my half-brother's half-sister and a distant cousin, who will spend the rest of the night naked in the hot tub. Oh well. Delirium's a Romance Sim!”

“I'm PermaPlat! Isn't that great?”

“I'm pregnant. I ate a grilled cheese sandwich, threw up three times, took a shower, threw up again, cleaned the toilet, threw up again, and decided to take a nap before I passed out.”

“So you don't want to celebrate with me?”

“No.”

“Artie! I'm PermaPlat! I went on 50 First Dates, and one of them was even with a robot, and I have no idea how it kissed me, but it totally did!”

“Robots aren't cool, man. They're just soulless machines.”

“But it turns out they're not bad kissers.”

“Pregnant! Barfy! Tired!”

“Are we bugging you?”

“No, it's okay, I have to go puke again anyway.”

Tess is a horrible pregnant Sim, and there aren't a lot of pictures because I was busy trying to keep her alive.

“Oooh! Baby! Finally!”

“Are you all right? Should I boil some water or burn some sage or something?”

“Not necessary. Just don't clean up that sandwich.”

This is Howe, a little boy with Tess's black hair and Artie's green eyes.

Howie gets plenty of attention from Daddy during the day and Uncle Marco at night. Marco's pretty happy to spend time with the baby, and Brad likes to make friends, so it works out well all around.

Tess finally managed to get a job in Paranormal so that she can get her hands on the Bone Phone, which she'll need to make Marco a zombie and complete his Black Sheeping.

Before long, it's Howie's birthday, and Tess does the tossing as Aphrodesia gets out of the line of fire.

Don't bother with the goggles. They do nothing.

Howie's a Cancer 8/3/10/8/6, which makes him the first Cancer I've had born into any house. Aside from the hair, though, he looks exactly like Brad the Hippie. This means Tess gets pregnant again about a day later.

“Hey, everybody! Just got a Bone Phone! I'll be barfing if anyone needs me!”

Somehow, Tess manages to fight her gag reflex long enough to cram a bottle of SmartMilk down Howie's throat and teach him to walk and talk.

Howie might not be cute, but at least he's a charmer.

“Unca Marco? Why you blue?”

“Because I'm a vampire.”

“I be vampire too?”

“You'd better hope not. I miss doing things when the ghosts aren't out.”

Clean and fed, it was time for Howie to grow up, which he did with an audience.

I love how the eyes don't seem to get any better.

Later that night, Brad got to Meet Someone New.

Or TWO Someones New, to be precise.

This is Delvecchio, who got Brad's green eyes and Tess's recessive blonde hair.

And this is Abel, who got the same coloring as Howie.

“Bleh! Congratulations! I have two more nephews!”

“Is it really necessary to 'bleh' that?”

“Bleh!”

Since I'm sure some of you are already agog over the number of slides, I'll leave it here with Tess, Brad, and the twins.

Catch ya next time for more babies, more birthdays, and the return of Spider Jerusalem!