each life has its place: lgbta young adults in the united methodist church chett pritchett, minister...
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Each Life Has Its Place:LGBTA Young Adults in The United Methodist Church
Chett Pritchett,
Minister to Students and Young Adults
The United Church, Washington, DC
Definitions:-LGBTA/YA: I use this term because many of the issues that face LGBT young adults and their allies are also issues facing non-LGBTA young adults
-Queer: a complex word with many meanings – but is heavily used as an “in” word among LGBTA young adults.
Psychosocial Development
Young adults ≠ “older youth”; 18 year olds magically become adults.
Erik Erikson’s study of psychosocial development across age ranges: Each stage plays a role in the development of personality and psychological skills.
If for any reason there is a halt in development at any of these stages, it becomes more and more difficult to fully progress to through the other stages.
Key Issues for Young Adults
Intimacy vs. Isolation This is a time in which relationships are
developed; we learn how to deal with rejection; Young adults build community with one another;
they form familial bonds; begin to explore generative work (vocation).
When one is unable (for whatever reason), to find intimacy, the process of isolation can occur.
Key Issues for LGBT Young Adults Many LGBT/YAs have similar issues as their
counterparts – but what, if we adhere to Erickson’s model, in the LGBT context might make it difficult to move easily from Adolescence to Young Adulthood?
identity
differentiationRE(a)Lationships
am I a good person?
cultural rules and regulations
self-awareness
confidencerole models
Our Role as Leaders of the Church
Engage LGBT/YAs in moving from Adolescence and through Young Adulthood.
Pastoral – through differentiation, exploration of identity and vocation
Communal – providing opportunities for young adults to share and create experiences
with one another Prophetic – to proclaim and seek justice for
LGBTA/YAs
The World of Young Adults Culture of Technology, Culture of Options,
Culture of the Overwhelmed. Heavily focused on experience Grown up with gay and lesbian personalities Out teachers, parents of classmates Post-Matthew Shepard/Fred Phelps
Views of Young Adults RegardingSexuality and Gender
American Values Survey 2006
Young Adults (18-29) lead the support for LGBT
rights regardless of their religious perspective. Marriage rights: 44% Marriage rights with Religious Liberty Assurance: 60% 63% of Young Adults support gay and lesbian adoption,
compared to 37% over the age of 60 This is not just cultural or religious:
-45% of Evangelical respondents
-59% of Latin/Hispanic respondents
-51% of African American respondents
Source: American Values Survey; http://media.pfaw.org/pdf/cav/AVSReport.pdf
Barna Group
An across-the-board perception that Christians are hypocritical, judgmental, and anti-homosexual.
Sources: http://www.barna.org/FlexPage.aspx?Page=BarnaUpdate&BarnaUpdateID=280
and http://www.generalconference2008.org/
Young Adults across the country have vastly progressive views regarding sexual identity than previous generations – and it doesn’t matter what their theological orientation is.
WHYAREN’T THEY IN OURCHURCHES?
LGBT Young Adultwho has left the Church
LGBT Ally who has left the Church
Non-LGBTA, but a Young Adult, who has left the Church
Perception ProblemAccording to Betty Butterfield
Open internet browser and paste this URL address-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRYp936G14A&feature=relate
d
Confuse chatting and shaking hands with being welcoming
Organist is blaring tired-a** church hymns Preaching attempts to relate to our lives, but
doesn’t really achieve that goal Methodists lack identity: “wishes to be
Episcopalian, they just couldn’t pass the test” Typical Middle of the road – “they don’t want to
offend nobody”
Even progressive United Methodists have a
perception problem:
-all Methodists are the same – tough to overcome
- boring, stuffy;
- haven’t started thinking about worship, outreach, Christian formation as if it were the 21st Century
- too excited to get young adults involved;(need for “young blood” to take over the tasks deemed necessary by a different generation).
These are issues that LGBT/YAs, whether insiders or outsiders, consider when making the important decision of seeking out a home for faith.
Philosophical quandaries
Key to this perception problem is that the philosophical constructs of young adults are different than any other generation previous.
Postmodern - a simplistic definition: a way of being in which the path of knowledge is not through a set of concrete truths; old ways of being are deconstructed and given new meanings dependent upon context.
“spiritual but not religious”
Is there a difference? More than 1/5 of Americans describe
themselves this way Difference between “public” faith and “private”
faith Rejection of traditional, organized religion
Source: http://www.beliefnet.com/story/109/story_10958_1.html
Who are these people?
More than likely, they are college educated Those who have grown up in the Church, but
have left: PKs, victims of clergy sexual and emotional
abuse, progressives who equate the Church with conservative values
Those who don’t allow doctrine to define their faith journey
HOWAREWEOVERCOMINGTHE PERCEPTIONPROBLEM?
We cannot expect LGBT/YAs to walk into our congregations just because we're reconciling or have a banner welcoming all people or have a hip, cool pastor. And if we do get them in our doors, we can't expect them to stay.
Three Key Areas
Hospitality
Outreach
Retention
Hospitality
More than coffee hour and handshaking, it’s a way of life;
Caring about people as people – not as “new blood” or “fresh faces”
Recognizing that young adults value narrative - they have a story to tell and are willing to listen
Focusing on the needs of LGBT/YAs in your Church and community
Outreach
Beyond the Four Walls A congregation and pastoral staff must be
willing to engage with the community – not just reaching out, but going out and bringing in.
Begin with what we have already: Building Tradition Passion
Outreach Ideas approach PFLAG, Pride
Committees, and other LGBTA groups an offer low cost or FREE meeting space in the church building;
host a concert of a musician with an LBGT/YA following
donate funds from a Rummage Sale to such an organization and invite their BOD to Church;
encourage a mission project of the congregation be with an organization with LGBTA clientele
ask staff/key leadership to attend a “Safe Space” training; host this training for others churches, businesses, schools, etc. in your neighborhood.
Advertise in unlikely places Use the technology:
Church Website Facebook/MySpace Blogging YouTube
Retention Factors that affect YA
participation in a ministry:
-increased school/work load-family obligations-today's economic reality
(working 2-3 jobs to get insurance/pay rent)
-more transient nature of workforce – especially in the Washington Metro area – length of stay is 3-5 years;
Based on Tribal Church: Ministering to the Missing Generation, Carol Howard Merritt; Alban Institute, 2007.
Don't be discouraged if YA participation doesn't always reach your desired level
Retention
Know each of the YA in your ministry – meet with them one on one. Try to meet with them at least once a quarter - their lives change frequently and you'll want to know about their lives (and they want you to know.)
After listening (REALLY LISTENING) to them, ask them about their passions and gifts and how those might be used in the life of the congregation.
Connecting and ConnectionsYoung adults build community with one another;
they form familial bonds; begin to explore generative work (vocation).
-Ministry with LGBT/YA is first and foremost about creating a space for community to exist.
-It is also about allowing for space to find passions and vocations – and understanding that people will often leave the community or explore other passions.
-Can their time in our communities be formative and generative?
Each Life Has Its Place:LGBTA Young Adults in The United Methodist Church
Chett Pritchett,
Minister to Students and Young Adults
The United Church, Washington, DC