Brandeis University’s Premier News SourceT H E F I R S T o f A P R I L o f t h e T W O T H O U S A N Da n d E L E V E N T H Y E A R o f O U R L O R D

VOL 8, NO. 10

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Several key university administrators will be participating in this years performance of Liq-uid Latex in an effort to raise money for the uni-versity, Senior Vice President of Communica-tions Andrew Gully announced Thursday.

Liquid Latex is an art show with performers and dancers wearing nothing but a thin coat of latex. All proceeds from the show this year will go to the university.

The university would not release details re-lated to what images would be painted on the administrators, however Gully said they would be doing a dance to a medly of songs in an act titled “pandering.” Among the songs will be M.I.A.’s “Paper Planes,” P. Diddy’s “all about the Benjamin’s” and “If I were a rich man” from the musical Fiddler on the Roof.

Though Gully would not specify who of the current administration will be participating in the dance, he did say that there would be a guest appearance by former university president Je-huda Reinharz.

“Throughout his career as president, Reinharz has shown his commitment to fundraising for this university,” Gully said. “This is just the lat-est step he is taking.”

Gully said he was originally supposed to be in the act, but will not be participating in the dance due to an ankle injury sustained playing basketball last month.

Sources close to the administration said the performance is a part of current university President Frederick Lawrence’s commitment to raise $80 million by the end of the university fis-cal year in June. While there has been no official announcement as to whether Lawrence will be participating in the festivities, the source said he has been disappearing from his office every

week for two hour increments, coincidentally at the same time rehearsals for the performance were being held.

The announcement of the administration’s participation in Liquid Latex recieved much support from the university art community, which has felt spurned in the years following the Rose Art Museum fiasco.

“I was really worried the university wasn’t committed to the arts anymore,” said one Fine Arts major. “But this changes everything.”

By Wittenberg WriterMama Owl

Top administrators to get down with Liquid Latex in fundraising attempt

This paper got YAELed

Pres faces changes post-inaugurationBy Alexander the Great

Imperial Editor

By Wittenberg WriterMama Owl

Board of Trustees Chair Malcolm Sherman revealed yesterday a plan to significantly reduce President Frederick Lawrence’s salary and use the funds for campus renovations.

Per Lawrence’s contract, he is required to work for the school for at least five years, but his salary is not specified. With yesterday’s inauguration com-plete, Sherman said in an interview, the board is free to cut Lawrence’s salary as much as they want.

“We weren’t trying to be sneaky or anything. But with the inauguration over, Lawrence has no choice but to continue as President. The inaugura-tion binds him to this school, which is, after all, an honor no matter the pay,” he said. Mark Collins, senior vice president for administration, clarified the plan: “The Board notified President Lawrence 23 minutes after his inauguration speech of its plan to reduce his pay to $35,000 per year, with the other $450,000 to be used to improve the old sci-ence complex, Rabb Academic Building and other buildings in desperate need of repair.”

Collins also clarified that any funds not used for building projects would be added to the Presi-dent’s base compensation package as bonuses.

“The board isn’t making any promises, though,” he added. “Some of these buildings are so worn, we are embarrassed to even let prospective stu-dents attend classes when they visit campus.”

Lawrence was unavailable for immediate com-ment, because he is in Florida for the day, solicit-ing donations for the university, before he returns for the inaugural ball tomorrow evening.

Asked whether this plan had been put in place before, Sherman acknowledged it had.

“In 1991, when we were trying to attract Presi-

In an effort to give a more positive spin on the university, President Frederick M. Lawrence an-nounced Wednesday he would be changing his name to Frederick Tiberius Weinstein.

Weinstein said he made the decision after a student explained to him that his initials, FML, stood for “Fuck My Life.”

“I realized I was signing all of my e-mails with my initials, and that it was giving the impression that Brandeis was not the best place,” Weinstein said. “Brandeis is a wonderful place, I wanted my initials to reflect that.”

Weinstein chose his new initials, FTW, be-cause it stands for “For The Win.”

“It’s an enormous plus for the community be-cause it gives us a great basis and it is something that can be used to broaden out into the com-munity,” Weinstein said. “It’s a way to include all people; that’s the first thing.”

Lawrence said that though the switch comes abruptly, “One of the glories of this university,

Name change to reflect univ success

Board to slash president’s pay

with all of its problems, is that we reshuffle the deck occasionally.”

The name-change was entirely Weinstein’s idea, however Vice President of Communica-tions Andrew Gully said it made his job easier.

“Now every e-mail has positive spin,” Gully said. “We will have to change all of the station-ary, but it’s worth it.”

Weinstein said he had been considering changing his name to reflect the acronym LOL (Laughing Out Loud), because it is also positive, but was worried that people would think he was not taking his job seriously.

“I happen to have this old-fashioned belief that being president is a great and noble profes-sion,” he said. “I don’t want anyone to take this lightly.”

Weinstein’s former initials have been the sub-ject of ridicule in the past when Brandeis’ pre-miere newspaper, The Blowfish, broke the story of the hidden meaning behind them.

“We really thought it was an important is-sue to bring to the community,” Blowfish editor Alex Norris said.

dent Thier, we offered him $900,000 a year for three years. The day after the inauguration, when we reduced that pay to $200,000, Thier was furi-ous,” he said. “We could afford that in those days, but it was still a pretty big reduction. That’s why he left us in 1994.”

President Jehuda Reinharz also took a pay cut, although it was insignificant, Sherman confirmed. “His inauguration went well, but when we reduced his pay from $500,000 to $200,000, Reinharz threatened to sell the art collection in the Rose Art Museum and pay himself from those funds. Some in the Board thought it was an empty threat, but when Reinharz started making calls to collectors, we just did not want the publicity, you know? We increased the pay to somewhere around $475,000 or something like that. Why do you think he stayed here so long?”

Professor Steven Whitfield (AMST), who is writing a history of Brandeis, explained that tra-ditionally, inaugurations were a financial tool that the Board of Trustees used to coerce a president. “Presidents arrive at Brandeis and they think, great, I am in control, but that’s not really true,” he said. “They are for a few months, but once the inauguration happens, everything changes. They become bound to the university by contracts, not by their salary. It’s like a marriage. Before the event, everything is great. Afterwards, reality sets in.” Asked why presidents have not learned from the past, Whitfield clarified, “This is only the eighth president. None were very good communi-cators, so I guess they haven’t shared much advice with their successors.”

The news isn’t all that bad, though, according to Whitfield. “My office gets really hot on summer days and really cold in the winter,” he said. “I can’t wait until the renovations begin.”

After much student activism including a pe-tition, beginning next year Brandeis will be an entirely cage-free egg campus. Animal rights activists are jubilant, the majority are merely apathetic, but for workers at the Waltham Cage and Metalwork Factory, the change has been di-sastrous.

“My father, my grandfather, all my ancestors worked here making cages for cafeteria-bound chickens,” laid-off worker Petra Adams told this reporter. “My family has been providing cruelty to those animals since before the first egg was even laid.”

Brandeis Senior Vice President for Opera-tions Mark Collins responded by calling the metal cage industry an “axis of egg evil,” and recommended workers like Adams try the other all-new food offerings on campus, conveniently highlighted on Dining Services’ new plasma menu screens (giant TVs) installed at all loca-tions.

But the cage-makers’ trials have wreaked havoc on the rest of the local economy as well. Waltham, long known for the watchmakers’ trade, has seen so much unused metal rusting away since cage orders for Brandeis chickens

were canceled that the City Council banned the import of new metal material. The watch in-dustry has suffered accordingly, forced to make faulty, off-schedule timepieces with the metal remnants of animal cruelty.

(Karmatically too, the expected gains in the Brandeis endowment were all based on rosy watch futures, and the market has forced Brandeis to consider even more costly cuts—ex-cept in the renowned Dining Services.)

The time debacle is probably why this re-porter arrived late to an interview with another laid-off metalworker, who offered a sordid cau-tion against the kind of economic destruction “misplaced” university activism could bring to the common man. (In another related matter, the defective timepieces have caused the infa-mous “Brandeis time” to disappear entirely, and all classes for next semester have started to actu-ally begin on the hour.)

The second sorry former cage worker said she had always had a contingency plan for her fam-ily in case she ever found herself unemployed: she had all her factory unemployment package pegged to the “ever-stable price of a human food staple,” eggs.

“But now,” Cassidy Earnhart said in her emp-ty kitchen, flanked by two starving boys, “I can’t afford to feed Butch and Bo because all the new, cage-free eggs are more expensive!”

By Nathan KraussAssociate Provost Editor

THE HOOT INVESTIGATES

Where have all the cages gone?Waltham cage market decimated following egg switch

photo courtesy brandeisnow

photo by Fizzy buble/the hoot

editorials2 The Brandeis Hoot April 1, 2010

Established 2005"To acquire wisdom, one must observe."

Alexander the Great Imperial Editor

Manifest Destiny American Editor

Nathan Krauss Associate Provost for Editing Johnny Appleseed Agriculture Editor

Leah Stinkleman Smelly EditorMosie Grossie Never Been Kissed Editor

Note to Self Reminder EditorShawn Richards Ten-Pin Bowling Editor

Still the Man Gordon Hall EditorLeah Left her Witts Layout Editor

Vanessa Kermit Frog EditorString of Pearls Jewelry EditorWittenberg Writer Mama Owl

Photography EditorsTrue Griddy

A.T. Phone HomeFizzy Buble

Senior EditorsBret Book of Mormon

Kayla Two SantosMaximum Shady

Volume 8 • Issue 10the brandeis hoot • brandeis university

415 south street • waltham, maFounded By Abram Sachar & Albert Einstein

Letters to the Editor

Editor’s Note: Last week, after signing into his Brandeis Hoot e-mail account for the first time, the

editor responsible for printing letters to the editor real-ized that his spam folder had 300 unread messages. Since it was a Sunday night and there were a million things he had to do, he decided it would be appropri-

ate to review the spam e-mails. To his surprise, a num-ber of e-mails were from actual students at Brandeis.

Our apologies go out to the students whose letters went missing – we reprint a selection below.

To whoever this e-mail goes to at The Hoot,

I fell in love with your newspaper after reading the article titled, “Asian art of obits” dated Jan 20th.

The beginning was perfect: “At an event last Wednesday attended by twelve students, Pro-fessor Ban Phu of the University of Central Thailand discussed how she writes obituaries for her English monthly newspaper of a circula-tion of 200 readers. The speaker, who comes to Brandeis through an exchange program funded by the Schuster Institute for Investigative Jour-nalism, answered questions on a range of topics, including death rituals in South East Asia and how to use Google Translate to write an article.

Man, I wish I could have been at that event. I had class, you know.

The point is, thank you for such a thoughtful article, but especially for the lead to the article. After reading it, I finally figured out my future career path. I have already contacted Prof Phu.

Without The Hoot, there would be no future me. Thanks Hoot!! <3- Danny Katz ’11

_____________________________

To the Editor,I was appalled to see that your newspaper

chose to send a staff writer to the Schuster Insti-tute for Investigative Journalism’s event on the topic of writing obituaries in South East Asian newspapers, yet your paper failed to cover the Russian Studies Department’s guest who dis-cussed preschool education in Moscow as com-pared with Saint Petersburg. Covering all cam-pus events is of utmost importance and failing to do so is just irresponsible. The Hoot could and should know better.Sincerely,Alex Bresnev ’12Russian Studies Undergraduate Representative

______________________________

Dear Editor,I was furious to read on BrandeisNOW that

the editors of The Hoot were planning to go bowling. But once I saw photos on Facebook, I knew I had to voice my concern. You purport to be a ‘community newspaper,’ and yet, you did not invite all members of the community.

I have never liked The Hoot. But my favorite sport is bowling, and when I heard about The Hoot’s outing, I really wanted to participate. I awaited an invitation, but it never came.

I hold you people responsible for the transfer applications I have begun to fill out. The Hoot, like Brandeis, just is not right for me.

I await your apology.- Arthur G. Cohen ’14_____________________________

To the Editor,I ask for anonymity in this article, but I can-

not stand silent while injustices are committed on this campus.

I have a fear of gorillas. It probably started when I was at Roger William Zoo in elementary school. This would have been in 1999 or so. I was in the gorilla enclave, when all of a sudden, the gorillas who had been sitting peacefully started making a yelping noise. I stared intently through the bars, and then, without warning, a large, male gorilla stood, beat its chest, and charged at me.

It all happened in a blur. My mom screamed, “[name omitted], your sandwich is near the ani-mal, move it now!” But it was too late, the go-rilla had already engulfed my sandwich which I had – stupidly – been holding near the bars to the cage, my hand still holding on. Thankfully, my dad pulled me away, or I would not have the right hand with which I now type this letter.

Suffice it to say that when I entered Usdan last week and saw a large gorilla dancing through the building, I freaked out. All I could see were sandwiches in Usdan, the gorilla and my hand in front of me and that was it, I collapsed. The doc-tors at Newton-Wellesley told me I had fainted and did not come to for about five minutes.

Students have fears, and you never know who might be affected. This time it was a gorilla, but friends of mine also have fears of spiders and even sharks. Ignoring this fact makes our com-munity less cohesive. And dangerous.

–Anonymous Student

On Leave this week: Yell at Cats, Feline Editor

TOP SECRETThe BrandeisConspiracy

What they don’t want you to know ...

This weekend, the university and its new president Fred Lawrence, received positive and glorifying news coverage in The Boston Globe.

While this is entertaining, it is also disap-pointing. We miss the days when former Presi-dent Jehuda Reinharz and headlines about the closing of the Rose Art Museum filled national news networks and daily papers. We miss the days when the media simply portrayed the Rose for its true significance—an institution literally crucial to the undergraduate education that stu-dents receive here.

An institution so important that it would be more logical to fire staff than to sell the art and save their salaries. After all, like the media, our university knew that these paintings were worth far more than people’s livelihoods. We also miss the days when any mention of Judaism or Israel was portrayed as religious tension and attracted NBC news to the Great Lawn.

Or when the behavior of one or two students

in the Muslim Prayer space last year produced a Boston Globe story about vandalism against Muslim students on a Jewish campus.

Stories about engaged students and successful fund-raising are too boring. We hope that the media sticks to its other guidelines: in order to write about Brandeis, the story has to be about religion or art. Period. Even when national re-porters literally write the same story line for months, despite what is happening in the world around them, we find these stories so fascinat-ing, so riveting that we enjoy reading them re-peatedly.

The current public relations team at Brandeis may know how to pitch a positive story to the Globe, but it does not know how to create those stories about the big themes—religion and art museums—that can describe everything about a university and its students. As the media knows, religion and art define our lives. This is Brandeis after all. Or so they thought.

Those good ole PR days

LOLPREZ: The eighth president of Brandeis Uni-versity, Frederick M. Lawrence realizes the extraordinary importance of his new position at his inauguration yesterday.

Editor’s note: Despite this photo being printed in our April Fool’s issue, we think it is important that the reader know that, with the exception of the text, this photo was not altered in any way from its original form. The prez really did make that face.

photo by Fizzy buble/the hoot

sPorts April 1, 2011 The Brandeis Hoot 3

President Frederick Lawrence announced Monday that football will return to Brandeis this fall to compete in the National Football League.

The announcement was made during a sur-prise visit to Brandeis by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell.

“It was always my intent to bring [football] back to Brandeis,” Lawrence said.

Since the NFL imposed lockout prevents teams from hiring replacement players, com-missioner Goodell has enacted a plan to hire replacement teams outside of the lockout, he said Monday.

The Brandeis football’s record of being unde-feated since 1959 qualified the team to join the AFC East this coming season.

“I’ll admit, we offered [replacing the Patriots] to Harvard first, but they were too nerdy and with the revival of your team it seemed a perfect match,” Goodell said.

Brandeis’ program will serve as an effective replacement for the New England Patriots for the year or longer, depending on the duration of the current labor dispute.

“We are very excited to be one of the 32 college programs to be included in the new National Free Football League (NFFL),” Law-

rence said.Since college players do not get paid the

large sums that professionals do, the NFL’s directors have set up this temporary league to further separate itself from the ongoing labor dispute.

The rejuvenation of the Brandeis football team will not cost the university any money. Because college athletes are not paid, Goodell said the NFFL will absorb any costs incurred by the university for transporting players to and from games.

“We plan to fully fund the rent and use of all current NFL stadiums for use by the new NFFL,” Goodell said. “The Judges will play their home games this year at Gillette Stadium. With such a unique opportunity for college students, we will also provide free buses and discounted tickets at prices comparable to the top NCAA football programs.”

When asked how students were expected to compete against the standard season ticket holders, Goodell explained “They have season tickets for the NFL, not the NFFL. Additionally, while many may want to buy into the NFFL, we expect to be able to accommodate them along side the standard student section.”

Resurrecting Brandeis’ football team also helps the university meet its financial needs.

“Everyone knows football’s a great way to make money, and Brandeis is a great school,” Lawrence said. “This way we can take celebrat-ing Brandeis to a whole new level.”

By Still the manGordon Hall Editor

Brandeis football NFL’s newest member

The NCAA announced Thursday morning that all Brandeis’ sports teams will be invited to join Division One play effective for the 2011-2012 season.

Brandeis will join the Colonial Athletic As-sociation (CAA), becoming the 13th member of the conference along with University of Delaware, Drexel University, George Mason University, Georgia State University, Hofstra University, James Madison University, North-eastern University, Old Dominion University, Towson University, University of North Caro-lina Wilmington, Virginia Commonwealth University and College of William and Mary.

Brandeis will not be compelled to start its own football program because the CAA has six football teams, an even number.

The CAA has primarily been based in the South of the United States because five of its 12 members reside in Virginia alone.

However, in the last ten years the confer-ence has been rapidly expanding adding teams in Massachusetts, Pennsylvania, and New York. The addition of Brandeis would give the CAA a larger footprint in the North-east.

Tom Yeager, commissioner of the CAA, cited Brandeis’ academic integrity along with their sports excellence as the primary reason for their addition to the CAA.

Yeager continued to stress that the excel-lent sports programs at Brandeis would help his goal of advancing the image of the CAA in the national market while the academics of Brandeis would help the CAA improve its overall GPA.

Yeager also said the NCAA is planning on expanding the Division I NCAA basketball tournament to 512 in an effort to make sure everyone gets a trophy. In order to fill 512 spots, the ranks of Division I must be ex-panded, giving Brandeis a chance in the big leagues.

“I feel that with the talent we have on all of our sports and the effort our athletes put forth every game we can compete with any-one,” Director of Athletics Sherly Sousa said. “I am very excited for the opportunity to take our athletics to the next level and join the wonderful CAA.”

Spring sports will not be affected by this announcement and will finish out the season in Division III.

In their fist act of the school year, the stu-dent union started a newsletter this week to inform the student body of what they have been up to for the past eight months.

“We don’t really have anything to put in it,” Union President Daniel Acheampong said. “But we figured the Senate should probably do SOMETHING during their weekly meet-ings.”

The newsletter will be a glammed up ver-sion of the weekly e-mails union secretary Herbie Rosen sends to the student body due to the lack of any real accomplishments to put in the newsletter, Acheampong said.

“Those usually just have club announce-ments and stuff in them, so we figured we would make it look pretty and make it look like we were doing something all at the same time,” Acheampong said.

Acheampong added that he didn’t really have anything else to say about the newsletter because “there is literally nothing to it.”

~Wittenberg Writer

By Life of BrianStaff

Judges to join Division oneBrandeis boxers or Briefs

Union publicizes

lack of achievements

As the school year winds down, seniors have begun to look ahead, planning for life af-ter college. Some, like Leah Lefkowitz ’11, plan to attend graduate school while others, like Bret Matthew ’11, are searching for jobs. For the most part, these are the only two options. One unique student, however, envisions a dif-ferent future for herself.

Ariel Wittenberg ’11, former editor in chief of The Hoot, has strategically failed all of her classes this semeseter in order to remain a stu-dent at Brandeis University.

“It’s not about staying at Brandeis,” Witten-berg corrected. “It’s about the children at The Hoot. They need me.”

Wittenberg plans to remain for at least an-other academic year, if not longer, in order to keep her position as an editor on The Hoot. “They need me,” she insisted, as she stood be-fore the staff of academic services. “I’m every-thing to them. I used to write the entire front page and sports section of the paper. I help with layout.” As campus security dragged her

out of the academic services’ offices, Wittenberg could be heard shouting, “I also draw graphics.”

“I’ve never seen anything like this,” Dean of Aca-demic Services Kim Godsoe said. “We’ve obvious-ly seen students fail before, but never intentionally. I plan to refer her to the Psychological Counseling Center; there is something wrong there.”

Wittenberg, sometimes called Mama Owl by her cohorts, struggled to find the words to explain her decision. “When Jehuda left, there was this hole inside of me and I never thought it could be filled again. I was depressed,” she said. “But then, with this brouhaha with JVP and Hillel, and the weirdness that was Fred Lawrence rapping, I real-ized that we would always have crazy controversy and crazy presidential actions to print. This is still the Brandeis that I know and love and I will not abandon it.”

When asked if he was worried about Wittenberg attempting to usurp his position, current editor-in-chief of The Hoot, Alex Schneider ’12, said, “Well, uh, I’ll be thankful for the help she can give, you know.” After thinking further, Schneider con-tinued, shaking his head slowly from side to side, “No, I’m not worried. No, everything will be fine.”

Professor Eileen McNamara (JOUR) was shocked and dismayed when she heard of Wit-tenberg’s decision to remain at Brandeis. “I’d sus-pected that she wasn’t all there, if you know what I mean, but I thought she was a smart girl. Well, it just goes to show ya,” she said brightly. After be-ing informed that Wittenberg planned to retake Ethics in Journalism with McNamara, the profes-sor pursed her lips, shook her head and said, “She always said she loved me but this is a bit much.”

Wittenberg declined to comment further on this issue due to her busy schedule, saying, “I have eight articles to write, three graphics to draw, two sections to lay and movable type to set by hand before The Hoot can go to press.” Wittenberg was about to say more when the theme song of “Law & Order” sounded in the room, prompting her to answer her phone, exclaiming happily, “Oh, it’s Andrew Gully.”

~Yell at Cats

Editor intentionally fails classes in effort to remain on The Hoot

Hoot PooPs4 The Brandeis Hoot April 1, 2010

In response to housing shortages and stu-dent complaints, the Department of Com-munity Living (DCL) recently announced that any students who did not receive hous-ing in this year’s lottery will have another option. Beginning fall 2011, students will be eligible to live in a tent city in Sachar Woods will be available to all students.

When housing ran out at lottery num-ber 1,300 this year, Director of Community Living Jeremy Leiferman knew something needed to be done. “We don’t want students to have to resort to off-campus options where amenities are often not well kept,” Leiferman said. “This way, everyone can stay on cam-pus.”

The Department of Community Living, with help from the Shapiros, has invested in approximately 200 tents for the new Carl J. and Ruth Shapiro Sachar Quad, located in Sachar Woods. An old favorite in biology and environmental research, the woods are located behind Sachar International Center and the International Business School. Pro-visions are availible for almost 350 students,

with students having a choice between single and double-person tents

Public Safety has also announced that the BranVan route is currently being redesigned to offer service to students choosing to live in Sa-char.

“This was a wonderful choice by DCL,” East Quad Community Development Coordinator Ashley Skipwith said in an interview with The Hoot. “Many of my residents had approached me before the housing lottery, worried that they would be living in tents on Chapels Field. Now, luckily, they’ll be living in tents in Sachar Woods, which will provide much more coverage in se-vere weather. They’ll have to walk slightly farther to get to class, but I think they’ll find the trade-off well worth it.”

Students have so far been very receptive to the change. “I’m just glad I can stop trying to find housing off-campus,” one said. After receiving number 2,719 in the lottery, he had worried that he would need to save boxes to create an elaborate fort on the baseball diamond.

In addition to providing more housing, part of the tent city will become an integral part of the Justice Brandeis Semester (JBS) program.

In 2009, when faculty members began to be-come concerned by university overcrowding, the JBS program was created to direct students off-campus in search of experiential learning, participating in programs such as Civil Rights

Setting up camp

and Racial Justice in Mississippi, and Film-making: From Script to Screen. However, with lower participation than the university hoped, semester programs like Environmen-tal Health and Justice were created to keep students on-campus while still providing “hands-on, multi-disciplinary” experiences, according to the JBS website.

The undergraduate faculty “believes in ex-periential learning because students can learn more efficiently, think more critically and deeply in many instances,” Dean of Arts and Sciences Adam Jaffe said at a faculty meeting earlier this year.

Because new JBS programs don’t direct stu-dents off-campus, JBS program director Alys-sa Grinberg had been working closely with other administrators to continue to alleviate campus housing concerns. When the Depart-ment of Community Living announced the creation of a tent city in Sachar Woods, Grin-berg decided to design a program that would take advantage of it.

Living Deliberately: Sucking the Marrow out of Life and Discovering How to Live will give students a chance to live outside and ex-perience homelessness, study urban environ-mental life, and heed the call of the wild.

Grinberg decided to name the program after Henry David Thoreau, an American writer and poet, who lived in the woods in

a house he had built in order to live as sim-ply as possible. When he returned, he said, “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.”

“I loved learning about Thoreau in high school and college. I thought it was so fasci-nating to just abandon everything and live in the woods. Obviously this isn’t exactly the same, but this is absolutely the kind of JBS program I’d be interested in participating in if I were a student,” Grinberg said. “Because the initial goal of JBS was to move students off-campus, this was the perfect opportunity to turn a lousy situation around and create a new program to increase participation in JBS semesters.”

“I’ve always wanted to live in the woods,” Danny Shpolyansky ’14 said. He has already started preparing the application for Living Deliberately. “I wanted to take part in JBS, but I don’t have time during the summers and I don’t want to be away from Brandeis during the year. This is the perfect solution.”

JBS enrollment priority “will be given to students enrolled in BUS 35a, Real Estate and Society, and SOC 152a, Urban Life and Cul-ture, as well as English majors studying Henry David Thoreau.

Sachar woods tent city available for fall 2011 housing

By Leah Stinkleman, Smelly Editor

photo by thoreau/the hoot