ISSUE #3 VOL#4 FEB O8 ***FREE

TRAVEL ISSUE!

revolution

revolutionSnowskate Shop

Wenatchee, Washington

revolutionsnowandskate.com509-665-6662

starfishsnowskatemagazine.com

“Is he doing anything or is he just drunk?” Matt “Corperate” Cupp on Jackson’s cover shot.

QUOTES“Snowskating is a fairly new sport and unlike skateboarding it is much easier to get

sponsored by companies because they need people to show off their products” Wilke-pedia on snowskating.

“Don't make me look like more of a chump than I already am” Pete Saari on Starfish.

“I don’t wanna ruin the session or anything, but I think I need to go to the hospital, fifteen minutes would be cool” Donny Green after his disk crushing slam.

“Don’t believe anyone with bindings” Brian Beauchene on the ski and snowboard industries.

“I will do anything to get in the magazine” Mayor Barry Tutle on Starfish.

“My wife even thinks it’s funny” Joey McGuire on Starfish.

“Don’t move that. That’s for my dog to pee on.” Mahala on Starfish mags sitting on the floor of her trailer.

“Fuck that. Get Terry Parker down there.” Jordan on Terry Kidwell judging the Ralston Cup.

“When we get there and you look around, you’re gonna be like, I’m glad I didn’t pay to come here” Tomoki on the Dirty South.

“Fuck that shit, I’m a snowskater now” Jackson on the Mt Baker banked slolom.

“Don't make me look like more of a chump than I already am” Pete Saari on Starfish.

Jake

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Florida Powder Mountain Lab

Big John photo by Leavitt

Florida Powder Mountain Lab

Bad Boy Justin Jackson Heath photos by Big John

Leavitt photo by Big John

Dane Orvold photo by Big John

Donny Green

Joey Siciliano

Podium

Brian Beauchene and most of The South have decided

snowskaters need to hold some kind of “World Speed Record”.

These rednecks have clocked themselves at an astonishing rate of 36 mph. At this point in time Starfish is unaware of

what it means to be “clocked”. However if any of our North West readers are capable of

“clocking” we should shatter those southern bitches record of

36 mph and make a new one.

Tech man Nate Barber won our monthly joke about John Knox contest with this

entry:“Did you here about Jen? She

got Knoxed up.”Nate was awarded a bloody mary and Starfish T-shirt for

his efforts.

The snowskate designers at Mervin Manufacturing have

shot themselves in the foot again. Shortly after snowskat-

ers discovered the Banana Theory and Magnatraction their

ideas were stolen by snow-boarders. Now Mervin is so busy selling snowboards that

snowskaters have actually been forced to stop work and build

snowboards.

Mike Rapaich of Duluth Minnisota recently became

Starfish’s only subscriber that still rides a flat deck.

Long time starfish sub-scriber Brian “Grandpa”

Smith from Hyak reports that he actually offended some

dude by wearing a Starfish T-shirt that read “There’s alot of Bull Shit in there”. Keep up

the good work Grandpa.

Jan Terri’s classic video “Get Down Goblin” featuring

a cameo by Pat Quin is now on You-Tube.

The Seattle based Spacecraft Litter company continues to be the Cascades #1 creator of point source pollution. One fisherman in the North Cascades reported

catching a 14 inch rainbow trout with a sticker on it.

After a three year hiatus, Adam B. , The Willie Wonka

of snoskating, has reopened his 10,000 acre Florida Powder Mountain Lab to the public.

Subsequentially Starfish Head-quarters has been flooded with

photos. Apparently powder snow is regaining popularity.

Starfish fan Adrian recently recieved Rocker Trucks for

his Birthday. Happy birthday Adrian.

The good people at Mervin Manufacturing have decided snowskaters need to be more

team oriented. Therefore they eliminated Gnu Snowskates

and created the Lib Tech Snowskate Team. Team work seminars are being scheduled

for this spring.

FUSE Snowskates recent-ly did demos at SNOW BASIN , UTAH. Other than that these dudes are too busy skating to

send us photos. Look for more photos next issue.

Arizona’s #1 snowskate com-pany Railz is now in their third year of sucking with no end in

sight. Cup the nuts guys.

The Hurricane Ridge baked slalom will be held March 28th. Bring your rain gear and your

surfboards.

BASTARD ALERT. Some bastard stole Big John’s

Camera after the Holy Oly and therefore all of the Starfish pho-

tos of the event has been lost.

Stevens Pass Washington is officially on the Snowskate Hot-Pass list. The worst ski

resort in the country has finally blown their cover. Washington travelers Beware, going to Ste-vens Pass is a huge mistake.

Krush pulled the plug on our “joking about location

joke” and would like us to re-mind our less attentive readers that the cover of the last issue,

with Sean D. doing a nose press in the dirt, was actually taken at Snoqualmie Pass, Washington.

The photo was taken before the resort was open and the dirt background may have made it look like it was taken at Ste-

vens Pass, Washington.

Jake Burton. Yes, The Jake Burton . Apparently hates all

of us. WARNING

IF YOU ARE ARE A SNOWSKATER,

SNOWSKATE COMPANY OR EVEN THINK SNOWSKAT-ING IS COOL. JAKE BUR-TON OWNS PATENTS ON

YOU AND CAN SUE YOU!!!

Starfish would like to remind our underage readers that Red

Bull is awesome.

The North Coast Stencil company was banned from this years Holy Oly event for show-

ing up too early.

Scott Sullivan still refuses to give us any more photos of

Wolle.

starfishsnowskatemagazine.com

Some jack ass snowboarder recently fell while getting off the lift in front of Merrisa George. In an attempt to avoid the jack ass, snowskater Merissa crashed and recieved 32 stiches in her knee

from her own skate.

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Okay, so basically I don’t do

sweet snowskate maneuvers like some of my friends, but I know a lot of cool cats go to Fernie to rip it up. Therefore, instead of making up a whole bunch of crap about Fernie (I’ve only been there twice) I decided to ask Jordan Armstrong and Colin Sproule why they love it there so much.

Colin’s answers:

What are your favorite runs to go

on and why?Some of my favorite runs at Fernie are the feeder runs that get you from one

lift to another. We ride the run from the top of Elk chair to the bottom of Bear chair a crap load of times every day and there are just so many familiar bumps and jumps, it’s a blast.

Do you ever snowskate off the hill? Is it sweet?

There are a few fun spots around Fernie for boarding off the hill. There is a sort of junkyard/summer equipment storage area that always has something fun to play on. There is also tons of hike able terrain if you aren’t lazy.

How’s the snow there?

Fernie snow is pretty hit and miss. Many nights ride the fine line between rain and snow with temperatures around 0 degrees Celsius. Sometimes a big heavy snowfall is rough goings on a snowskate, but when you get the deep dry stuff it’s heaven.

Do you ever go out anywhere in

Fernie like to shop or eat?

I like the Fernie town. There is a local shop called Commit. It is a great place to hangout and buy stuff if you have money. The movie theater is pretty

boss with its small town vibe. If you don’t like movies, the Ghostriders games are always entertaining. I am always amazed at the number of fights at those games, as well as the ratio of drunken people (especially Aussies) to sober people. It should also be noted that there is a killer purple bus taxi service that makes stops on the hill and in town. It only costs $3 to ride the purple bus, and is great for going to the bar if you have a place on the mountain.

What kind of sweet maneuvers

“It was also easy to find the bathrooms and the cafeteria”

By: Darryl Pollock

do you do at Fernie?Best part about Fernie is just gnarly terrain and riding runs that make snowboarders feel like babies. Over the years we have ridden just about everything from tree runs, to steeps, to the occasional park run. Over all, Fernie is a great mountain with a nice balance of big resort access and facilities, with a good small town vibe.

Jordan’s answers:

I like Fernie because you can loop the mountain without going to the base. It also has awesome natural terrain, and before RCR turned into fuckbags they had a fun park. Fernie allows snowskating, which puts them at the top of the list by default, but even if

they didn’t, it would still be a pretty rad mountain. Plus Adam and Matty at the Commit shop are super down with snowskating and they run a nice shop.

My input:Even though I’ve only been to Fernie once in the winter, the mountain had a wide range of runs so everyone could ride their skill level, and didn’t feel bored or scared. It was also easy to find the bathrooms and the cafeteria, which is good when you have to pee, or are really thirsty. The only downside to Fernie is the parking is really far away from the mountain, but a sled can come and pick you up and take you to the hill if you feel like waiting. I would definitely go there again.

Jordan Armstrong

Mark’s Backyard and Red Rock

Montana The original title of this article was going to be called Hippies are not to be Trusted, but things changed, and I learned that hippies can kind of be trusted…almost…sometimes (but not really).

I was supposed to meet Shag and Spicolli at Mark Edmundson’s house in Idaho on the morning of Tuesday January 22. We would then drive

Spicolli’s truck to the X Gaymes.

On Monday night I got this message “We r fuct. A low oil pressure light went off in my truck. Put oil in. shit wont start? Passin out in the truck. 22miles outside moses lake.”. I called Spicolli the next morning only to find out they were still stuck on the side of the road, but they had called AAA and they were going

to get towed to Ritzville.

Not knowing what to do, I offered to pick them up and said we could take my truck to the X-Gaymes on one condition; they didn’t make it smell like hippies. Knowing they couldn’t not

make a vehicle smell like hippies, they declined and proceeded to spend the next day in Ritzville demo’ing the new 2008 North Coast stencils.

After waiting around for a while, I decided to go to Mark’s house early and get a day of riding in. I crossed the border into America-town no problem and was at Marks house in the early afternoon.

For lack of a better title, Mark Edmundson is a Powder Farmer. He has a plethora of lines surrounding his house and he waits till they are just right and proceeds to shred them. He leaves some for later, and has a cycle so he gets fresh turns in his backyard for most of the season. Mark must also be

By Jordan Armstrong

“Hippies are not to be Trusted”

“For lack of a better title, Mark Edmundson is

a Powder Farmer.”

a physicist because the jumps he shapes in his park beside his house are amazing. There is a right hip, left hip, wallride, step up, table and a teacup. Among these features are gaps and lines making hours of fun. The geometry of the features is nothing short of perfect. The jumps pop you just right, and the transitions are all in the right spots. The park contains no rails, which is very radical and

makes sense because rather than having to dig out rails after every snowfall (Which apparently is often, as I came back to Marks house at the end of the week and had to dig my truck out of 2.5 feet of snow) he can just make his snow features radder and create more lines. The best part of Marks backyard heaven is that everything is such a small hike, and you can do

powder lines and park lines within the same vicinity. If you are ever presented with the chance to ride Marks Backyard Park I highly suggest you take up that offer. For footage of the park check out SnowskateBlog.com.

On the X-Gaymes trip, I also got to ride on the side of the freeway

in southern Montana, just outside of Red Rock at 1 a.m. when the truck ran out of gas. It is windy, cold, rocky and there is barely any snow. I do not recommend riding there if you are presented the opportunity.

snowskate.ca

“We could take my truck to the X-Gaymes on one condition; they didn’t make it smell like hippies.”

Jake, photo by Jimmy Clarke

Rusty

Sean Davis, photo by Pat Bonser

THE PILGRIMAGEBy Mark Edmundson

Traveling to Seattle Wa to watch a 20

min snowskate movie may sound a bit extreme to some. But considering how much time I spend building snowskates, thinking about snowskates, working on jumps for snowskates, and trying to convince others that snowskates kick ass, I’d say that it’s pretty much a reli-gion for me. And what better place to worship than a bar in Pioneer square with a bunch of other converts.

My pilgrimage starts with a short ses-sion at Hillyard in Spokane. A grindline skatepark seems an appropriate rest stop for a trip to Seattle. Five more hours of driving and I’m smack dab in the middle of 5’o clock traffic. Two hours later and I’m stroll-ing past junkies into the Last supper Club. TV screens on all the walls with footage from Triolgy’s latest skate flick means I must be in the right place. I grab a beer and head to a seat to talk snowskating with whomever I can find. The first guy I strike up a conver-sation with tells me how much he likes Schweitzer. I tell him were good to go now with respect to snowskates at Schweitzer and he replies, “if I’m going to Schweitzer then I’m snowboarding.” Ok, this guy’s not of my church. Then I run into Sean Davis, the man behind the flick, and score two pre-released copies for 10 bucks. That alone makes the trip seem worth it see-ing how the vid is still a month away from being released. Then I see Jake from Rocker trucks with his latest creation in hand. I bee-line for him and check out the trucks,

they’re totally trick and beautiful. Then I run into Tim from Starfish who seems amazed that I drove all the way out here for a snowskate vid. I tell him that I’m trying to hit skateparks along the way and then it seems, make more sense. Pretty soon the vid starts and I’m all business, but as luck would have it I’m standing next to some idiot who wants to talk. “Holy #$**, these guys rip, their really good huh? Do you know them? Is snowskat-ing hard?” “Yeah” I reply and try to concentrate. It’s impossible to take in a vid on the first go, you really need to watch it four or five times before the details emerge. This is true with “Only a matter of time,” and while it seems to flow great and the editing is pro, I can’t tell if what I’ve seen is ground break-ing or not. It’s over way too soon but the two copies in my pocket insure that I will have another go at it. I finish my beer and head out-side for some fresh air. I see Shag from Libtech holding the latest and great-est, a banana mag 48” snowskate. I had called several shops on my way

“what better place to worship than a bar in Pioneer square”

down to see if any-one had these in stock but everyone was out. He lets me take a closer look and it’s sick. This is not just a skat-edeck mounted to a skiboard but a snowskate, designed by snowskaters who don’t snowboard. Turns out this is the raffle prize so we head in to see who will take it home. Of course I don’t win it. Some guy, who has no idea what he’s won, does. I offer him 200 bucks, it re-tails for 340.00. He reply’s that 220.00 will do it. I reach for my wallet only to realize I’ve left my cash back at my brother’s place. I ask him if he’ll wait for me to go to an

atm. “Yeah, but hurry, we’re taking off soon.” I go next door to a small store with an atm but it’s broken. Then I call my sister in law and have her grab my cash and come on down to the bar. I rush back in to tell him the money is on its way but he’s gone. Ahhhh!!!! I head back outside to wait for my ride. While standing in the rain I start talk-ing to a guy and mention I’m from Sandpoint. “Hey, we were going to open a board shop in Sandpoint,” he says. Turns out this guy is the owner of Extremely Board. “Do you guys have any of the libtech 48’s?”

I ask. “Yeah, we got a whole stack of em,” he replys. “Not the 43’s but the 48’s,” I ask again. “Yeah the 48’s.” He gives me direc-tions to his shop and says they open at 10. My ride comes and I head back to my bother’s place. I plop the dvd in and watch it two more times. On the sec-ond viewing I finally catch Clarke Hurl-but’s early grab 360. HOLY COW!!!!!!!! That’s ground break-ing for sure; in fact the whole vid rips as do all the riders. When Sean Davis kick flips the gap on the Shut Up And-Snowskate quarter, it looks so smooth. If it wasn’t for the

screams in the back-ground you’d assume he does this type of thing all the time.

The next morning it’s raining as I get ready to head back. Extremely Board is actually on my way home. I get there right as they’re opening up. $340.00 later I am the proud owner of my first libtech snowskate. It’s still raining as I head to the summit. The plan was to try and visit Leaven-worth’s skatepark on my return trip. Lots of people said the east side is usually dry but it’s hard to believe. As I drive over the summit it starts to clear. 5 miles from Leavenworth and the ground is soak-ing wet but as I pull into the skatepark its bone dry. This weather is madden-ing but at least I get to skate. The park is supper fun. It’s just me and a few kids. A short but fun ses-sion then I’m back on the road for 6 hours of driving, plenty of time to think up an excuse to tell my wife on why someone who spends so much time and money building snowskates would spend three hundred dollars on another one. Maybe I’ll say it’s for her.

The Smokies with Tomoki

Starfish Goes To The Dirty South

After eight weeks

of straight pow-der storms at the Florida Powder Mountain Lab the Starfish crew was ready for some slush and sunny skies. Fortu-nately Brian at Pluto Sports called Starfish Headquar-ters and invited us down for some southern hospital-ity including Jan

Terri videos, moon-shine, sunshine, slush and some kind of contest where we could school most of the

local snowboard-ers. Brian made the arrangements and Clarke #3 In The Word, Tomoki Kunimitsu and I were on our way to the dirty south,

Knoxville, Tennes-see to be exact.

Our four hour flight turned into a seven and a half hour flight and as our plane weaved in and out of tornados Tomoki enjoyed the privacy of the bathroom where he could puke in comfort. After all of the puking To-moki convinced the flight attendants into letting him maintain his exclu-sive residence in the bathroom by dry heaving until we were all safely on the ground. Fortunately for Tomoki and the flight attendants our next flight was cancelled and we were stuck in Memphis.

Around this time I get a text message reading, “twelve more inches at the Florida Powder Lab” What in the hell are we doing stuck in Memphis surrounded by Tor-nados and people who talked like they were choking on their tongue’s?

After another full day of delays we

“This is where fat families come on

vacation”words by Leavitt photos by Tomoki

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finally arrive in Knoxville the next evening. Brian picked us up and we drove two and a half more hours straight to the Ober Gatlinburg Ski Resort where we barely snuck in two runs. Then two and a half more hours back to Knoxville. The drive was scenic even in the dark and our tour guide Brian kept it in-teresting by point-ing out all of the sights. We drove though beauti-ful Pigeon Forge. Pigeon Forge is about 15 miles of places to eat, ho-tels and arcades. Brian informed us with a drawl that “This is were fat

families come on vacation, and fat people come to get married” Appar-ently after Vegas, Pigeon Forge is the #2 place to get married. Brian also pointed out a strip club that was B.Y.O.B., Dollywood and the world’s largest knife store.

The contest was being held at Ober Gatlinburg, some kind of strange backwoods snowkate para-dise. The resort features a water slide, an alpine slide, a go-cart track, an indoor ice skating rink, a scenic tram ride and of course a huge arcade. We took a few runs

on the chair and each time the lift-ies seemed to look for a new reason to hassle us. All of these lifties were 45 year old dudes who had never skied, snow-boarded or prob-ably even sledded in their lives. At home these people usually are carnies or rodeo hands

here in the dirty south they were lifties.

The day of the contest it was warm and slushy We arrived late enough to miss the rider meeting and be informed by the Hillbilly Con-test Official that “if this was a REAL contest and not an Ober Gatlinburg contest we would have been disqual-ified.” Who cares this is Ober Gatlin-burg. Give us some bibs so we can school these east coast shredders.

We got our bibs and made it to the race course. It was awesome, like two hundred vertical feet of man made snow with three gates. Perfect, I knew

“The contest was being held at Ober Gatlin-burg, some kind of strange backwoods snowkate paradise.”

Brian Beaushene

Clarke Olliebut #3 in the East

the snowboard-ers were going down. We rolled up and the Austri-an Event Coordina-tor looked scepti-cal. Fortunately, I was wearing my new day glow sunglasses that have fun written all over them. We easily convinced the Austrian Event Coordinator that we could safely make it down the course and even beat some of the shredders.

The race was on. We patiently watched while the shredders did their thing, most of them speed checked, some of them even fell. Awesome, these shredders were going down. To-moki was first and he bailed about 3/4 of the way down the course. The Austrian Event Coordinator looked at me as if to say “nice sunglasses but I still don’t think you can make it down the hill” The start-ing gate was made of a few 2x4’s stuck in the snow. Therefore you could not just pull

yourself though the starting gate before your run. Rather each rider was seized by the collar and hurled through the gate by the Austrian Event Coordinator.

So, I was hurled through the gate and on the coarse, thirteen seconds later I was though the finish and be-ing told by the Hillbilly event Co-ordinator that I had the smoothest run yet.

A few more shred-ders had their turn and then it was time for Hurlbut #3 to show these shredders why we were really here. Hurlbut dropped in like a bat out of hell and by gate three he was re-ally moving and his feet were all over the place. Could he hold on? Duh? Hurlbut held on with a smok-ing run that will frighten the east coast shredders for years. Now it was Brian’s turn. Could he beat the shredders? Brian was hurled though the gate and had a flawless run. As

we waited for our times we headed towards the Aerial event.

The aerial event was actually about thirty feet from the race event (the whole run was about one hundred feet wide) and consisted of what would be normally called a “mogul to flat.” I could describe it in better detail but you should just look at this photo of Brian and we can move on...

When the awards were finally handed out Brian took third in the aerial event (against the shredders) and of coarse Hurlybut took third in the timed race (against the shredders). Our mission was complete: We had schooled the southern shredders. It was time for some free riding in North Carolina.

Brian Beauchene at Ober Gatlingbug

After Two hours of lakes, hills, rhododen-drons and scenic high-ways we ended up at the best ski resort in the south, The Appa-lachian Ski Mtn. This place is sick. Slush Sun and two parks featur-ing a c-box, table tops, and rails. The Appa-lachian Ski Mtn had a way more laid back vibe and none of the lift operators seemed to care what we were up to. We rode the parks until our session ended and a local ski patroller offered to take Clarke Buts board if he didn’t stop hiking the jumps. Yeah, right.

North Carolina

“Hurlbut dropped in like a bat out of

hell” Clarke #3 at Appalacian Ski Mtn.

Appalachian Ski Mtn

We easily eluded the patroller even with our skates and cool sun-glasses. We went to the lodge and split up. After our brief search of the entire lodge we found out there was no bar. This place was getting weird so we quick-ly left for our next destination Wolf Laurel.

Three more hours of scenic back roads and we ended up at the Wolf Laurel lodge, another ski lodge with no bar. Something creepy was going on but after a long day of driving and snowskating we were willing to take some chances. We sat down to a southern buffet and enjoyed the

clogging of a trav-eling tap dance quartet.

Wolf Laurel prob-ably had the most vertical and high-est elevation of all the resorts we visited giv-ing it more of an alpine feel. The runs However long ranged in width from about 3o-8 feet wide and a high speed starfish could easily end

you up in the dirt. No trip to the east coast is complete without some bone crushing ice. Wolf Laurel delivered ice of all colors, blue ice, black ice and even the dreaded clear ice. We checked all of the ice and found a few small quar-ter pipes, an icy

park and a real icy over-vert hillbilly wall ride. Even-tually The whole mountain closed because of high

winds and since there was no bar we headed back to Knoxville.

Knoxville has a pretty nice new skatepark built on an old softball field with lights. We skated for a few hours. Then it was time for some Jan Terri Videos and a lot of moon-shine. Moonshine is great. It burns your throat for the first few sips and then you just go numb. Once you are numb the white lightnin just flows right down. Next thing you know it is morn-ing and your still drunk sleeping next to some poor tourist on a plane

back to Seattle.

Special thanks to our southern hosts Brian, Rachel, Fiji and Pluto Sports.

Brian Beauchene at Wolf Laurel

Leavitt at Wolf Laurel

Covington, Washington 253-630-4440NOLLIES.COM

PLUTO SPORTS

WWW.PLUTOSPORTS.COM

KNOXVILLE 865-523-0045

AND GATLINGBURG 865-436-9990

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702.794.0743

It was a simple plan, really. Spicoli and I pick up Jordan in Idaho, then rally to Colorado

for a few days of riding before doing the X Gaymes. Simple enough. Obviously, since nothing ever goes as planned, it wasn’t like that...

After we passed Snoqualmie Summit it seemed as though we were lagging up the hills. Spico’s truck wasn’t THAT gutless. We rallied this route last year. When we stopped for gas we found out why the truck was lagging. Somehow without us noticing The Notorious Victor had installed a camper on the truck and had stowed away with us. Seems his sponsor left him hanging. At least we knew we were lagging because of the sheer weight of his fat ass. OK then, The Turd is on board with us. We were gonna meet him in Colorado anyway. And with Sean D, Pat Quinn, and Matt Quam to posse up with...we were gonna blow some minds. But like I said...nothing ever goes as planned...and our vehicle, now dubbed the “Millenium Spico”, rolls on through the night... In the middle of nowhere Eastern Washington, only a few hours into the trip, we get our first kick in the nuts. The oil light comes on and the

The X-Gaymes

By Shag

X X

ride grinds to a halt on the side of the road. She aint starting. It’s 2 in the morning and 20 miles either way from the nearest town. We spend the night on I-90 with no heat in sub zero weather, wind chill included. I thought for sure my toes were frostbit. The next day we get towed to the sprawling metropolis of Ritzville, Washington where we find out that the truck had blown the distributor to the tune of hundreds of dollars...and we were stuck there for the night because the parts wouldn’t be there until morning. At least we had the camper. And a supply of liqour. The fine men at Pete’s Garage let us plug in to their power and we got a decent amount of sleep.

After a little breakfast, Victor found himself the proud owner of a breathalyzer. They sell those things in Ritzville. Now we have accurate measurement of just how much alcohol we can legally drink. Finally around lunchtime we see the newly repaired Millenium Spico ready for launch. Back to the mission. Jordan was called and assured that we really would be there today. We rallied from Ritzville to Mark “Chillerdeck” Edmundson’s place just north of Sand Point, Idaho to get him.

Arriving at Mark’s place was a relief. His backyard is a snoskate fun park loaded with nice jumps and a 6 foot quarterpipe. Unfortunately, we didn’t have the time to stay and session it as we were a day and a half behind schedule. Jordan, however, spent the day ripping this place to shreds waiting for us, and had learned frontside threes in the process. Then, upon learning of our “bi-deck tre flip for 49 beers” contest, the Canadian Crippler proceeds to bust one out in roughly 10 minutes. He doesn’t drink...that was the funny part. He allowed us to drink his prize if he could recycle the empties afterward. Well, now we have everyone, so we loaded up the Millenium Spico and hit the high road for Colorado.

But, of course, it’s never easy. The GPS sent us on what looked like a shorter route to Missoula but ended up taking twice as long. The same device had us going through Utah...which we weren’t too keen on doing, but it was a shorter route on major highways. We needed to shave as much time as possible so we pushed on.

Utah did us ugly. We were stuck in traffic for hours. The hills slowed us down further and Victor’s weight wasn’t helping. To top it off...The Utah State Troopers pulled us over for a crack in the windshield, but then changed it to not allowing a car to safely merge. Then the dog was unleashed and 2 members of our party were handed rather large tickets afterward. It really could’ve been worse, but the Stater just sent us on our way, saying “You almost made it....Colorado is only 20 miles...”

About 4 hours later we finally meet up with Sean Davis and Pat Quinn near Asspin, Colorado. They are horrified by our stories of the road. They had a much better time traveling, and they had rode the hell out of Breckenridge while waiting for us. With all representatives present and accounted for, we caravan up to Buttermilk to see what’s up with the snowskate course...

After being searched and passing security we find ourselves in the zoo known as the X-Gaymes. It’s kind of like a cross between a county fair and a professional wrestling show. Booths and sideshows visited by people in costumes holding signs with their favorite rider

Shag“we knew we were lagging because of the sheer weight of

his fat ass.”

and how they want to sleep with them and what not. The snowskate course was one of the sideshows. We stood in awe of the squared circle...it was about as big as a wrestling ring. Well, maybe twice the size. It had a small rail, a box that my snowskate was longer than, a medium sized flat-down rail, a small jump, and a 5 foot drop off with a flat box on the left and a flat-down box on the right…both with no way to get speed to get on. Ummm…unless you set your skate behind it, took 2 steps and jumped on it. It became clear that the speed and burliness that we need to do our thing was impossible in this environment. Spicoli and Victor immediately (and loudly) voiced their disapproval of the course. Sean and Pat laughed at it. I shrugged and figured I’d just deal with it. Jordan was not surprised. He had

“Allen, one of the Premier team guys, wanted to try some Bi-deck style riding”

Sean D.

starfishsnowskatem

agazine.com

his own plans and weapons to deal with it.

We all agreed that the best riding wouldn’t be done in the course, but up on the hill. Upon getting the lowdown on the contest, we found out that we didn’t get our credentials due to being 2 days late…which meant that we didn’t get the much sought after plastic card with our picture on it so we can ride the lifts and get into certain areas. The Disney police shut down any attempts to pass out any item…including shirts, videos, flyers, or anything…to anybody. The Disney police also threatened to confiscate snowskates being ridden outside the course, and took a cigarette right out of Sean’s mouth. Jordan swears it’s because we don’t use certain shaving gels or eat extreme pizza rolls. The fine folks at Premier snowskates, Tim, Chip, and Carrie, knew of our hardships and helped us out all they could. We were also surprised that the guys on the Premier team already knew who we were, and were stoked to have us there. Since it was pretty late by now, we went back to Asspin and found a nice million dollar house to run the power cord to the Millenium Spico, and prepared for the next day of riding.

We were treated to a beautiful, bluebird day of riding, spending most of the day hiking and filming. We were stoked to see our friend Rusty come down from Telluride to rip with us! Allen, one of the Premier team guys, wanted to try some Bi-deck style riding. Pat hooked him up with a Ralston ski and he mounted it on his Premier. He kept up with us all day and had the biggest ollies of all. We were all stoked on his instant ripping. A little mellow session at the snowskate park and we were done. Rusty pulled the best move of the trip by letting all stay at a friend’s nearby condo…and most importantly, allowing our rotten stinking asses to use the shower. Oh yeah. A hot shower and a cold beer can change your entire outlook. Pat and I found out we were related…We both have an uncle named Jim Beam. We consulted with him many times that night.

Contest day. The morning was the qualifier, with the finals later in the day. Spicoli refused to ride the course on the grounds he would get hurt on such small jibs, but did agree to help judge the contest. Everyone rode the course the best they could…hell, even the Premier

guys weren’t too stoked on the setup. I suppose there’s only so much you can do when the Disney police expect a park course safe for the kids. But we rode...maybe a better term would be wrestled… the jibs in the squared circle. The Bi-decks had their own qualifing round, but once again the Disney police stepped in, saying that they didn’t like the name “Bi-deck” for whatever stupid reason and had us announced as the “Double decks”. What a crock of shit. The guy who invented them called ‘em Bi-decks, and dammit, that’s what the hell they are. Victor, Pat, Rusty, Sean, Jordan, and I stepped up to the challenge. Pat hit the medium rail aggressive style with Rusty, Sean and Jordan were getting flippy off the jump, while Victor and I searched for the odd lines to hit the most things. When the bell rang, Jordan, Sean, and I had made it to the finals. We killed the time until the finals by hiking

Jord

an A

rmst

rong

“Allen was stoked on his new setup and

decided to ride it in the finals…even at the risk of being disqualified”

and filming. Allen was stoked on his new setup and decided to ride it in the finals…even at the risk of being disqualified.

We hooked up the lifties with some schwag product and they let us ride all day. It was so much fun to spray the spectators...or as we called them, the X-Gapers…on the way into the lift line. We were totally beat when it was finals time, and here we go. Chip was on the mic announcing us as we walked to the top of the X-Gaymes Pro Snowskate invitational course.

I laughed to myself when random people were shouting my name…even funnier was my little fan club who insisted to Chip that I was gonna win. I assured Chip that there’s always a chance that the other nine would get hurt.

Still…we were all tired from riding all day…even the Premier guys. They had been slaying this course all day. We had a half hour of wrestling ahead. They rang the bell and it was on.

Allen hit the medium rail with his Bi-deck setup and was disqualified, but laughed it off. Jordan and Sean had ollied the medium rail and were flipping away with Bjorn, Phil, and Matt of the Premier clan. I used my old school skills to the fullest with an acid drop, a no-comply, and a boneless off the drop that would’ve made Bill Danforth proud.

Bjorn, Matt, and Jordan assaulted the flat-down box with kickflip front boards and lipslide fakies. Phil has a pro deck with Premier and backed it up with solid flip tricks off the jump and drop off. We all looked and laughed at each other when Chip announced “Only 15 more minutes to go…” We were all completely over it and were ready to quit…but the wrestling continued. Sean stuck a varial flip off the jump. Jordan was loudly smacking his setup on ollie 50-50’s down the medium rail. I got my 50-50 shove-it out of the same rail. The bell

rang and the match is over. Who will win the X-Gaymes Pro snowskate invitational title belt? After the judges meeting We had our placings:

1st- Matt Plays2nd- Jordan Armstrong3rd- Bjorn Ryan-Gorman

For those wondering, Sean got 4th and I ended up 6th. We all were just glad it was over. Mission accomplished. We even got our foot in the door for being involved next year for the contest. Perhaps we can get some money together to appease the Disney gods and get a bigger course next time. After some goodbyes to our new friends in the Premier Clan, we got

“even funnier was my little fan club who insisted to Chip that I was gonna win.”

Jordan Armstrong

the hell out of Asspin.

One more mission: Ride Copper Mountain. We rolled out to our homie Matt Royer’s place, and were treated royally there. Everyone relaxed while Pat and I had another serious talk with Uncle Jim.

The next day we met up with Billy K at Copper Mountain and got in one more day of riding and filming. Billy rides a small Salomon PP3, but was absolutely destroying it on the mountain. Jordan was going nuts…ollies onto rails at full speed. Pat caught some big airs in the park with Spicoli. Victor manned up to the ski-jump box which had a mandatory big ollie to get on.

Billy had the lines on the rails…half cabbing to

them regularly. Multi-trick lines were busted out by all, and I took my nutsack to the limit by sticking a 50-50 on the over-waist-high-rail. Before we knew it, ski patrol had closed the runs and we were finally done. We laughed and relaxed over several pitchers of Coors, and Billy’s drink…the vanilla stoli 7. Then it was time for the road. No Utah route this time, baby. We suffered through 30mph winds with 50mph gusts consistently through Wyoming. Many blown over semi trailers on the roadside.

In Montana, the wind changed to white-out and the wrecks were stunning. An old truck was almost completely underneath a semi. Jordan was dropped off at Mark’s house in Idaho and greeted by 3 feet of snow on his

Jordan Armstrong

truck. The weather continued through until about Spokane, then the ride got easier. Victor was dropped off at Snoqualmie and the load lightened tremendously. Home sweet home!

Thanks to everyone who helped us out on this crazy adventure…Chip, Carrie, and Tim from Premier…Kelly from the X-Gaymes, Rusty for putting us up and letting us shower, The Utah State Troopers for not arresting anybody, Billy K for the discount tickets and drinks at Copper, Matt Royer for his home and hospitality, Pete Saari for footing the unbelievable gas bill on this trip, and of course, Uncle Jim.

“Allen hit the medium rail with his Bi-

deck setup and was disqualified, but laughed it off.”

YOU GOTTA TRUST SOMEONE!!!

LEAVITT PHOTO

BY BOB CO

FEE