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My Dear Friends in Christ,

The season of Advent has begun for Christians world-wide. That means that Christmas is near. Shopping is here. For years I struggled with selecting gifts for the people I loved. I wanted so much to make them happy. At times I would be so nervous about mak-ing the right decision that it would keep me up some nights. Sometimes I bought several things because I was so unsure. Eventually through some inner healing prayer, I became aware of some of the roots of my anxiety. I remembered that my first cousin had always hated my parents’ gifts, no matter how current and seemingly desired they were. I don’t know what my cousin’s problems with gifts were but I do know that, after prayers for healing, gifts are no longer such an emotional quagmire for me. Gifts are full of complexity. Do we give what we know the other wants? Do we give what we ourselves would like to get? Do we give what we think the recipient needs? And then, there is receiving. Do we reject gifts openly or in the secret recesses of our hearts? Do we ac-cept gifts and immediately wrap them in a layer of obli-gation that the giver may not have intended? Do the gifts have strings? Gifts are a symbol of relationship, and Christmas is the season of God’s great gift. In the Incarnation, God gives us himself - what an awesome and undeserved thing! He gives us the gift of his presence. He gives us the gift of receiving. Ordinarily, we think of the Incarnation as God’s entering human life and history in the person of Jesus. So then, it is something that has already been done. However, the Incarnation also makes it possible for us to enter into the life of God. So the Incarnation continues. God becomes part of every area of our human lives in order to draw ourselves to him and his divine purpose. God gives his abiding presence, redemption, eternal life, daily bread, healing, purpose, guidance, and joy - gifts without number. Certainly it tells us something about the nature and character of God. The response to giving is receiving and, as Shakespeare put it, “therein lies the rub.” Receiving too is complex and difficult for many - maybe all - of us. Michael Downey, in the magazine

Volume 111, Issue 116, December, 2013 Email articles to:

office@carolinechurch.net

The Carillon

Our Caroline Church Vision Statement: To help people encounter the living God together

and live transformed lives for Christ.

Our Mission Statement * We, the parishioners of Caroline Church of Brookhaven, are committed to Jesus Christ, to His teaching, His life, death and resurrection, in our call to serve and worship Him, in the tradition of the Anglican Communion.

* We strive to share our faith and blessings for the further-ance of His kingdom in an environment of love, under-standing, and support, through prayer, worship, Christian education, and fellowship.

CHRISTMAS SERVICES

Christmas Eve Tuesday, December 24th

5:00 p.m. Children’s Service, Youth & Teen Choirs

Festal Holy Eucharist Rite II

8:00 p.m. Festal Holy Eucharist Rite II,

Adult Choir

10:00 p.m. Festal Holy Eucharist Rite II,

Adult Choir

Christmas Day Wednesday, December 25th

10:00 a. m. Holy Eucharist Rite II

with Christmas Hymns

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Fr. Farrell Graves

Every Word Matters About a year ago, Carly Rae Jepsen released a song, “Call Me Maybe,” the refrain of which is, “Hey I just met you/And this is crazy/But here's my number/So call me may-be.” The final “maybe” stands out powerfully in ungram-matical relief. So much of our current culture resides in that “maybe.” It is tentative and ambiguous, meaning both, “maybe you'll call me” and “maybe I want you to call me,” for, although the song professes a kind of love for the recipient of the number (“You took your time with the call/I took no time with the fall”), there is a self-protective nu-ance in the appending of the “maybe.” There is, in other words, both a desire for and a fear of connection, between which most people exist today. Our consumer capitalist world teaches us that we are all commodities, isolated and on the market in competition with other commodities. I have even heard people say, not recognizing the truth of their statement, that they are “back on the market” after a breakup, and people dating complain that those they meet are always “looking to trade up.” In contrast with the consumer model in which people are alienated and in competition, Christianity teaches us that we are always already connected. We all share the image of God. The indwelling Holy Spirit flows through all of us to create a network of being. We Christians start from the assumption of meaningful interdependence. Connection is not, in other words, something lacking that must be estab-lished. If we start with the mistaken assumption of utter independ-ence, there is no safe way to bridge the gap. Relationships become perilous and we are left to dwell in the liminality between longing for connection and fearing it, for it could be lost again as soon as the object of our affection is dis-tracted. It is no wonder that Jepsen sings “I'd trade my soul for a wish.” Such a diabolic deal is the only apparent way out of this trap. Our youth therefore grow up with a sense of isolation and alienation. Many turn to drugs to numb the pain of dwelling in the gap between desire and fear. Should we tell them that God can enter into and fill this gap, they are unable to accept it because it runs coun-ter to their experience of the commodified world. This statement is, moreover, theologically unsound. In reality, God created us connected from the start so there is no need to remain trapped. The utter disconnect between us is per-ceived, but not real, the source of great social and personal ill. Merely saying, “We are all connected,” on the other hand, though theologically sound, does little to change a lifetime of conditioning to feel disconnected. This is why the Eu-

called Weavings says, “Incarnation as the language of God’s giving is not the word we want to hear. Certainly this is not the gift we expect, so we refuse it. We close our ears to the language of God’s constant giving. We search and strain for another sort of god and hide from the God who comes as gift.” Our refusal of gift is there from the beginning in Gene-sis. What Adam and Eve have been given is not enough for them, not quite to their satisfaction. They look else-where, instead of to what is right in their midst. They grab for something else, something they have chosen. Then they run. They run from the presence of God, God’s gift. In the incarnation, Eden is restored. The gifts of God’s presence, of life, of future, are offered yet again. The call to the spiritual life is simply learning how to re-ceive what can only come as gift and then to live in that gift in all the ordinary experiences of our daily lives. The secrets of receiving? First, we need to be empty enough to receive, empty of ourselves, of pride, of fear. Secondly, we need to be willing to accept the gifts that God chooses for us. Sometimes the gift is not what we expect, something that we would not choose for ourselves. Don’t many ministries start that way, not as something we plan, but what we stumble on along the path? We cry out, “But I never imagined doing this!” Sometimes the gift stirs up all our feelings of unworthiness – like my cousin’s Christmas gifts. Sometimes the gift has been wrapped in the paper of change - don’t we all resist change! Thirdly, we need to stop perceiving gifts as a medium of exchange - you give to me, and then I give to you. In life, I may need to receive many times before I have the ability to give. God’s gift of grace is not dependent on our performance. At other times, I may need to give and give and give, and always joyfully. Have you ever considered that we enter this life and leave this life helpless, without any control? The new-born babe and the dying receive the ministrations of others. Perhaps the giving and receiving we experience in the years in between are preparation for eternal life when we finally know - really know - in our hearts that everything is a gift from God! And if giving or receiv-ing is a challenge for you, seriously consider praying about it with another Christian for healing. Never un-derestimate the power of prayer! Advent and Christmas blessings to you, Canon Richard+

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We would like to remember in prayer, those who are serving in the

Armed Forces.

Afghanistan: Michael Cardamone, Adam Fullerton, Roy Raguso, Mike Hanna, Kevin O’Donahue Kevin LoRusso

May God protect them, bless them,

and bring them home soon.

Our Anglican Heritage

Frances Joseph-Gaudet Frances Gaudet, was born in the year 1861, in a log cabin in Holmesville, Mississippi of African American and Na-tive American descent. She was raised by her grandpar-ents. Later she went to live with a brother in New Orleans where she attended school and Straight College. Wid-owed early, she dedicated her life to prison reform. Be-ginning in 1894 she held prayer meetings, wrote letters, delivered messages, and secured clothing for black pris-oners, and later for white prisoners as well. Her dedica-tion to prisoners and prison reform won her the respect of prison officials, city authorities, the governor, and the Prison Reform Association. A delegate to the Women’s Christian Temperance Union international convention in Edinburgh, Scotland, in 1900, she worked for the reform of young blacks arrested for misdemeanor or vagrancy. Joseph-Gaudet was the first woman to support juvenile offenders in Louisiana, and her efforts helped found the juvenile court. She eventually purchased a farm and founded the Gaudet Normal and Industrial School. The school, which eventually expanded to 105 acres and nu-merous buildings, also served as a boarding school for children with working mothers. Joseph-Gaudet served as principal of the school until 1921 when she donated the school to the Episcopal Church of Louisiana. Though the school closed in 1950, the Gaudet Episcopal Home opened in the same location four years later to serve Afri-can American children ages four to sixteen. The endow-ment fund currently supports St. Luke’s Community Cen-ter on North Dorgenois Street, where a hall honors Frances Joseph-Gaudet. Frances Joseph Gaudet died on December 30, 1934. The Episcopal Church honors her ministry and life every year at the end of December.

charist and the daily office, forms of common prayer, are so significant. Through them, we experience the connec-tion that our society denies. Through these acts of prayer, we are moved to a deeper knowledge of our connected-ness; we are brought to a place of healing. Unfortunately, even the experience of prayer can seem meaningless to someone who is deeply alienated. Such a person rarely stays around long enough to sense this transformation, to build trust and to recognize our mutual connectedness. It is time for a revival of Christian anthropology and ethics to counter the deleterious consumer model of humanity.

Caroline Book Club News: On Saturday, Nov. 23d, ten members of the book club voyaged across Peconic Bay to Shelter Island. Our desti-nation was Sylvester Manor, the largest northern planta-tion of our young country. It opened for business in 1653 and encompassed all 8,000 acres of Shelter Is-land. For three centuries it was a slave plantation with indentured Africans and American Indians up until 1827 when slavery officially ended. The early stone carved with the words "Colored People's Gravesite" remains a visible reminder of this sad history. We toured the sec-ond plantation house which was built in 1737 replacing the first. It now operates as an educational foundation and organic farm on the remaining 250 acres of the origi-nal property. Our interest in Sylvester Manor was sparked by reading Marc Griswold's "The Manor: Three Centuries of a Slave Plantation" the story of its histo-ry. Why not join us at our next reading adventure. The Book: Anything you have read or are reading that you are willing to share The Location: Al Carlson's home - 109 Main St., Setauket, just down the road from our par-sonage. Date and Time: Sunday, January 5, 2014 at 3:00pm. Al has promised to keep up his Christmas tree and decorations! Questions? Call Karl 751-7234

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Buildings & Grounds As the weather cools, we prepare for winter—and spring. Sprinklers systems have been blown out, most of the hos-es put away, and freeze-wilted plants removed. We have replaced the pulled flowers with a few cabbage plants and winter pansies to give some color along the walk-ways. Below the surface, many bulbs have been planted to provide color for next year. While I have received a lot of assistance this year from people like Bill Harvey and Bob Clancy with painting projects, etc., when it comes to the gardens Linda has been the mainstay—and deserves the predominant credit. She tells me where to dig—and I dig. I’ll take some credit for putting in the drip irrigation lines that watered all those flowers, but she picked them out, put them in and did the pruning. Kudos also to Old Field Landscaping for the great job of keeping the grass and shrubs trimmed all summer—and the leaves cleaned up this fall. Finally, to Valley Resto-ration for the paint and carpentry work in August that make the church and Parish House look amazing. The gardens, grounds and freshly painted church really do make Caroline Church look like a post card to send to family members far away. In mid-November we welcomed the long awaited re-placement of the Siberian Sweet Pee tree, now residing in Fr. Jim’s Garden. The original had died in 2012, good specimens can be hard to find, so we waited until fall to plant it. It’s on the small side and is sometimes referred to as a shrub. Right now it reminds me of the tree in the Charlie Brown Christmas TV special, but it will green up next spring and once again grace the base of the steeple like its predecessor. On the building side, we completed the replacement of the rooftop air conditioners that serve the second floor of the MCS Building. Doing this work in the fall cost us half of what others quoted for the work. This is the start of a multi-year initiative to upgrade units, some of which date back to the eighties. It will save money in the long term with lower maintenance and operating costs. The final weeks of 2013 will be a bit less active mainte-nance-wise, due to the colder weather and Christmas sea-son. But don’t forget the Christmas Fair on December 7. We will be decorating our buildings and grounds for Christmas and planning for 2014. The opening of the History Center has been a great success and a great use of that space. Some stained ceiling tiles in the History Center will have been replaced before you read this arti-cle. That revitalized area sets up quite a contrast with the adjoining space. But with the rerouting of the church/Parish House rain runoff out to the parking lot, and the installation of a dehumidifier that pumps itself empty, we

seem to have finally dried the undercroft of the church. No flooding of that area has occurred since the gutter rerouting in the spring of 2012. So it’s a 2014 goal to rejuvenate the library and choir robing area, starting with the aging carpet. We want that space to serve as a multi-purpose meeting area that people want to use. Some mucking out and new carpet will go a long way toward achieving that goal. So enjoy the Advent and Christmas seasons. Part of me dreams of the “White Christmas” but the other half is mindful of the cost of the snowplows. Maybe just a dust-ing on Christmas Eve . . .

Chris Haring, Chair Buildings and Grounds

Caroline Campus Cares….. We would like to say a special ‘Thank You’ to all who donated supplies & food and those who helped put the boxes together. The boxes were stuffed to the gills and we had about 12 adults and 5 kids helping. We would also like to thank the Brotherhood and CYC for writing lots of personalized letters for the boxes.

‘Thank You’ to the entire Caroline Church congregation for supporting this very important ministry.

Eileen Hazell, Linda Sanders

20s & 30s Goup

Trivia Night: Advent Edition Advent is a time of waiting, preparing our hearts for the coming of the Christ Child, and shaming the other pa-trons of the Country Corner with our trivia brilliance (in a Christian way). Come out on December 17th at 8:00 to keep the tradition of excellence alive. If childcare is an issue, consider coming stag (one of the Porters will be). Please RSVP to Lindsay at

lindsay.baldwin.porter@gmail.com or on Facebook at Caroline Twenties and Thirties.

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CYC News

CYC will meet on Friday, December 6 at 7:00 in the MCS kitchen to bake cookies for the Cookie Walk the following day. Please bring all the ingredients and tools you will need for your recipe. If you can't come on the 6th, please consider making some cookies and dropping them off at the Fair on Saturday morning. We will be having the cookie walk at the Christmas Fair, starting at 9:00 and lasting until the goods run out! We need youth to man the table and drum up business with signs out-side. Please let Lindsay now if you're available. CYC will be ON HIATUS Dec. 22 and 29. Enjoy this busy time with your families. We will meet again Janu-ary 5th for brunch at the Setauket Village Diner. Please bring $10-$15. January 12th will be our Annual "White Epiphant" (see what I did there?) gift exchange. Bring something "special" (read: crazy junk) you find around your house, wrapped up, to CYC at 4:00pm. Last year we were blessed with the arrival of Polo the Chicken, so who knows what fate has in store for us in 2014? Please save the date for Ski Trip 2014! We will be hosted by the Nalewajks in Burlington, Vermont, the weekend of February 14. The exact details and dates have not be finalized, but we will probably need at least one more adult chaperone/driver, preferably not a parent of a par-ticipant (the number of drivers will depend on the num-ber of youth going on the trip). Please note, skiing is not mandatory! Last year many elected to sled, relax in the hot tub, and make a blanket city rather than hit the slopes, and this option only cost $75. Financial aid is available- speak to Mary or Lindsay.

2014 Offering Envelopes

Your new offering envelope box is in the ‘upper’ room of the Parish House in al-phabetical order.

Please walk over there after Sunday Services and pick yours up, this will save us the postage of mailing it to you. If you cannot find one with your name on it, and would like one, please call the parish office and we will get one for you. Thank you.

Church School News We have begun to work on this years’ Christmas Pageant. We will have a dress rehearsal in December either December 20 or the 21st. I

want to make sure which date works better for every-one. The pageant will be on December 22 during the 9:30 service. We will once again have a contest for the best bulletin cover drawing to be used for the Pageant and for the Christmas Eve 5:00pm Service. Please have your children's drawing back to me as soon as possible as the winners will be decided on December 13th. The drawing needs to be in black and white and on a 5x7 piece of paper. The winners will be decided by the church staff. The church school will be making Advent wreaths on December 1. Each church school family will take one home. Each family will receive an Advent calendar and daily devotional book. If you are unable to join us and would like to make one at home let me know and I will give you the materials. Our Christmas Tree is up and is decorated with angel ornaments. Please take an angel ornament off the tree and buy the gift that is written on it. Please return the gift before December 10 to the church office. I will be delivering the gifts to Little Flower for the children. We are also collecting hats, mittens, gloves, and scarfs. Please bring them in by December 22. We will not have Church School on December 29th. Church School will start up again on January 5. We will have an Epiphany Party for all the children on Jan-uary 5. After the first of the year I will be sending out a flyer on upcoming events for the rest of the year. From my family to yours, May the Lord Jesus truly bless you during this wonderful season as you rejoice with family and friends. May you open and cherish His gifts of peace, joy, grace, mercy, goodness, faithful-ness, self-control, salvation, hope and love and may you share the blessings with all those around you. Merry Christmas to you.

Mary Doherty Church School Director

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Annual Caroline Church Christmas Fair!!

Our traditional Christmas Fair will be held on Saturday, December 7th from 9:30am to 3:00pm.

WE NEED YOUR HELP (big or small)

In order to make it a success and to raise funds to help those in need during hard times. Possible ways to help: Set up/decorate tables On Friday, December 6th from 9:30am to completion in the Marco C. Smith Building. Donate items for: Bake and Food table Used Christmas decorations New Gift Table Jewelry Table Crafts & Hand Knit tables Whatever you can do to contribute, we will appreciate very much. Please bring your items to the room across from the bathrooms on the 1st floor of the MCS build-ing. Thank you.

Pat Harding, President Members of the ECW (MB)

Annual Parish Meeting Our Annual Parish Meting will be held on Wednesday evening, January 29, 2014 at 7:00 p.m. in the Marco Smith Building. Please plan to attend this very im-portant event in the life of our church. If you are re-sponsible for writing a year-end report for an area of ministry you have been involved in over 2013, please complete it and electronically e-mail it to Janet at:

office@carolinechurch.net in the parish office no later than January 13th.

Supervised childcare and rides to the annual parish meeting will be available, please call the parish office several days in advance of the meeting if you need these services. All parishioners are encouraged to at-tend this gathering of our parish family.

Guide to Publicizing Great Events

When we put on great programs, we want people to come. Lots of people. But sometimes they don’t. A recent pro-gram at Caroline Church (November 2011 - Caring for the Caregiver) showed us basic steps to take to promote a pro-gram. It worked. 43 people pre-registered for our program, 40 of whom were from outside Caroline Church. That was a much bigger registration than we had expected, since it was a first-time program, and we were doing all the leg-work to promote it, from scratch. A similar program a couple of years ago attracted approximately 10 participants, even though the organizers thought they were adequately publiciz-ing the event. This shows us that the right kind of publicity can make a huge difference in the number of attendees. If you prepare for and run an event or a program at our church, surely you want people to attend, and sometimes you want to attract people from the local community as well as from our parish. If you want to attract more people than typ-ically come to similar (or past) events, consider taking the following steps to promote your event. Be warned, though; this takes planning and work. Step 1: Start planning how to spread the word 2-3 months before your event. Step 2: Enlist a few people who can devote time and energy to spread the word. Step 3: Print really nice flyers describing your event. We found that high quality paper made an impact. You may want to include a phone and/or email for RSVP so you have an estimate of the number of people attending. Be aware that the majority of people will RSVP during the two week peri-od just prior to the event. Step 4: Think of who your target audience is outside of Car-oline Church (if this applies): school children; senior citi-zens; parents of young children; scouting troops; neighbors; others? Step 5: Beginning 2 months before and ending 1 week be-fore your event, have 2 or 3 “advertizing blitzes”: contact local papers, spread the word at Caroline, hand out flyers to your target population. Consider placing flyers in local com-mercial establishments and libraries. It is crucial that your prospective attendees receive multiple notices of your event. Many people ignore or forget about the first notification, even if they are interested in attending. We distributed more than 3000 flyers! Step 6: After your event hold a “postmortem” meeting to figure out what worked best and how to advertize even more effectively the next time. There will be a next time. If this sounds like a lot of work, it is. But we found that it worked for us. So if you put a lot of thought and effort into making a wonderful program, we suggest that you invest time and effort to publicize it. If you have any questions, please contact any of us who publicized the Caring for the Caregivers program: Virginia Cash, Terry Russell, Jan Vis-conti or me, Gillian Winters.

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Don’t Forget…….

Buy Gift Cards for Stop & Shop / King Kullen /

Wild by Nature

At coffee hour on Sunday or at the church office during the week!

Parishioners buy a $ 50 gift card,

spend $50 @ store of choice Store gives CAROLINE $$$$

We are still in need of a volunteer to sell Gift Cards on the 2nd Sunday of the month. Are you looking for a ministry that won’t take too much time? Well this is the answer to that question. Sell Gift Cards during Coffee Hour on Sunday. One Hour of your time once a month. If interested, please call Janet in the Parish Office at 941-4245. Training is available.

Prayer Shawl Ministry

We will not be meeting for the month of December. Please have a blessed Christmas Holiday. Our next gath-ering will be on January 18th, location to be determined.

Please call for information: Sue Seel/ 631-689-0683

Coffee & Fellowship Hour Host/Hostess

Sign up for 2013/2014 Please feel free to sign up for this wonderful time of sharing. Open to families, organiza-tions or individuals who would like to share their ‘hostess’ gifts. The sign up list is on the clip board in the MCS building. You may either just sign up on the list, call the parish office at 941-4245 or contact Len Calone at 928-2019.

Crèche as Antidote to Advent Mania

Everybody's Christmas is better with a creche in it. If this is not true for you, you have not found the right crèche. Using many examples from her own collection, Denise Outlaw presents the history and tradition of the crèche and teaches how to read its symbolism. Join us for the two-lecture series at All Souls' Parish House on Tuesday, December 3 and 10 at 7:30 PM.

Daughters of the King

Prayer, Service & Evangelism We are starting a new chapter of the Order of the Daugh-ters of the King at Caroline Church. All women of the church are invited to attend. We are currently in the process of a monthly study to discern whether we each feel called by God to become a daughter. If you would like to participate in the study, it is not too late. Please contact Chris Muffly and she will be happy to give you the materials. In order to complete the study we are meeting monthly on Saturday mornings from 9:00am-10:00am in the par-ish house. Our next meeting is December 7th at 9:00am. The Order of the Daughters of the King® (DOK) is a spiritual sisterhood of women dedicated to a life of Pray-er, Service and Evangelism. We have made a commit-ment to Jesus as our Savior, and we follow Him as Lord of our lives. We are an Order for women who are com-municants of the Episcopal Church, churches in com-munion with it, or churches in the Historic Episcopate.

Theophilus Healing Mission A Chapter of the Order of St. Luke the Physician

The next Healing Service is Friday, December 6th at Car-oline Church, 7:30 pm. There will be no OSL meeting this month. Have a Blessed Christmastide. Our next Healing Service will be Friday, January 3rd at St. Cuthbert’s E.C., Selden starting at 7:30 pm. Join us in 2014 to see that God is still healing His people today.

Ginny and Ann Coveners

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Grief Support Group

Our next meeting is to be determined. An-yone who has lost a loved one is cordially

invited, even if your loss was years ago. Your attend-ance may be the spark to help someone else. We follow a basic structure and all sharing or discussions are held confidential. For additional information, please contact Fr. Richard at the parish office, or Don Muffly at 689-8804.

Caring for the Caregiver Caroline Church has emerged in our local and, actually, not so local community as a place that provides care-givers, any and all caregivers, a forum in which to come and receive support on many different levels. It is remarkable to see a caregiver attend their first meeting. They are usually pretty raw and desperate, just trying to survive and get through each day. Then you watch them leave; the fight back, their energy re-newed. The support of other human beings, all suffer-ing their own uniquely difficult and challenging is-sues, has provided a bond of support generously shar-ing the combined strength of all. It is wonderful to witness the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. The support group continues to meet on the 2nd and 4th Saturdays of each month from 9:30am - 11:00am in the Parish House. The group is free, non-denominational, non-sectarian and non-disease specific. For additional information, please contact Virginia Cash, Support Group Facilitator, at 631-428-0902 or at vcash5msw@aol.com

Sonshine Ministries The Sonshine Ministry is here for YOU! Let us make your life easier as you or a loved one recuperates. Many fellow pa-

rishioners are on hand to bring a hot meal to your home. All that’s required is to ASK! If you, or someone you know is in need of this ministry, please contact Dianne Johnson, 473-7913; Claire Mis 689-1210 or cmis@hotmail.com; or Barbara Delfyett at 751-3658.

Celebrate Stewardship 2013 Yes! We do celebrate and give thanks for: 1. Two delicious Church Dinners organized and cooked by Sue and Bob Nalewajk, along with the many volunteers and sous-chefs that assisted, and 185 of our parishioners attending! We also fed over 180 people at our local soup kitchens with the leftovers – a true loaves and fishes story; 2. Children’s messages delivered by Lindsay Porter and Jan Visconti; 3. Children and youth involvement in our services and at our dinners, along with the support of Sue Nalewajk, Mary Doherty, Jan Visconti, Katherine Kaiser, Barbara Tyler and others; 4. Our witness speakers: Nick Amato, Joan Neuls, Gin-ny Apmann, Jan Visconti, Sue Seel, Thomas Hull, Sarah Hull, Maritza Groth-Hurewitz, Virginia Cash, Chris Muf-fly, Gary Mis and Mark LaSorsa! Our ministries have deeply touched many; 5. The use of Setauket Presbyterian Fellowship Hall for our Celebration Dinner when we outgrew our MCS building space; 6. Our actors and actresses at the Celebration Dinner: Sarah Hull, Sharon Donnelly, Fr. Farrell, and Richard Schwab; 7. Chris Haring for putting together a wonderful power point reflection of our stewardship throughout the year; 8. An amazing and hard working Stewardship Commit-tee; 9. The wonderful support and expertise of our church office staff: Janet Giacomini and Nancy O’Neill; 10. Support and leadership of Fr. Richard Visconti and the Vestry 11. All of us: Caroline Parishioners! 12. 110 Estimates of Giving received as of 11/18/13. Total not available as of this writing!

There is more to do! Our annual budget is typically around $500,000.00. Please help us continue the

celebration and let’s bridge the gap!

Have you turned in your Estimate of Giving Card?

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My Offering for Christmas Memorial Flowers In memory of ___________________________________________________________________________________________ As a Thank Offering for _______________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________ Name:_________________________________________________________________ Envelope No._________ Amount: $ ____________________________

Christmas Decorations

Christmas is coming up very quickly and as we begin to think about Christmas presents, let us not forget about adorning our church with the beauty of Christmas flowers. If you would like to make a gift of flowers for the altar on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, please fill out the above form and return it to the Parish Office, One Dyke Road, Setauket, NY 11733, no later than December 8th, 2013. Please make checks payable to CAROLINE CHURCH, with “Christmas Flowers” noted in the memo portion of the check. Let us not only remember our loved ones who have gone before us, but let us be thankful for the loved ones in our midst now, and for the joy of family and friends around us.

All Souls Episcopal Church Annual Children’s

Christmas Concert

Saturday, December 14th 6:00pm

All Souls Episcopal Church Main Street Stony Brook

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Ultreya! Ultreya is a Spanish word, meaning Onward! It was in common use by pilgrims to greet and encourage one another along the way. All Parishioners and their friends are welcome to join us for Ultreya. It is a shared time of fel-lowship, singing and spiritual encour-agement.

We will not be meeting in December. Please watch future Carillon’s for more information.

December Birthdays

12/01 Diane Amato Lorilei Whitsit 12/02 Tony Knapp 12/04 Catherine Gristock 12/05 Erin Frank 12/06 Paula DiBartolo Rachael Suydam Maggie Shimaitis 12/08 Robin Thomas 12/09 Charles Neuls, Jr. 12/10 Carol Fortner 12/14 Ruth Wintjen John Cierski Bobby Aiello Tyler Yarema 12/15 Gene Free Margaret Gilmore Taylor Schwab 12/17 Jan Visconti Oliver Rhame 12/18 Jeffrey Morse Madeline Rampone

12/19 Judith Wieland Christine Lopez Susan LaSorsa Aaron Woreth Olivia Schmitt 12/20 Bill Hall 12/21 Denise Stubberfield Cecile Pfingston 12/22 Edward Vitale Karel Orlowski Alexander Stubberfield Ryan Worrell 12/23 John Mastauskas Charlene Seymour Cathleen Esernio Jessica Gonzalez 12/24 Craig Massie 12/25 Tyler LaSorsa Francis Buchet

12/26 Patricia Calone Annette Pollert 12/27 Susan Rydzeski Salvatore Semler 12/28 Nick Amato Julia Acker Garren Engel-DiBartolo 12/29 Irene Ruddock 12/30 Helene Bredes Mark Lukianchuk Nick Dubowski Daniel Klinzing Robert McCarroll 12/31 Holly Griesel Laura Hengerle Adrian Gilmore

H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y

Soup Kitchen Volunteers Wanted Special Opportunity:

December 31 New Year's Eve Celebration Dinner

Set-up and Cooking: 3:30-5:45

Sing Along: 5:00-5:45 (Auld Lang Syne, Amazing Grace, etc)

Serving and Clean-up: 5:30-7:00 Set-up thru Clean-up: 3:30-7:00

Christ Methodist Church

Old Town Road, Pt Jeff Station

Youth (16+) and adults welcome Under 16 with parent, please

Gently used coats welcome, as well! All sizes.

Call Sue Nalewajk for details (631) 871-5327

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“Whatever gift each of you may have received, use it in service to one another…” 1 Peter 4:10

Parish Ministry Opportunities

Sell Gift Cards at Coffee Hour

Are you looking for a ministry to do at Caroline Church that doesn’t take a lot of time commitment? Then con-sider selling ‘Gift Cards’ on a Sunday morning. We have one slot presently open. The 2nd Sunday of the month. If interested, please contact the church office as soon as possible. This is a very important ministry as we receive 5% for every gift card sold. The cost to the purchaser is the face value of the gift card and the stores, Stop n Shop, King Kullen/Wild By Nature gives us - that’s right...GIVES US 5% back. This is such an easy fundraiser, costing Caroline Church nothing, that we want to continue it. Many of our parishioners have now gotten into the habit of purchasing them, but we are in need of a person to volunteer to sell them during coffee hour on the 2nd Sun-day of each month. Please consider giving 1 hour of your time to Caroline Church on 1 Sunday of the month. You will be fully trained. Please contact Janet in the parish office or Chris Haring if you are interested or would like more in infor-mation.

Ultreya Coordinators

At 7:30 p.m. on the fourth Friday of every month, we host a region-wide Ultreya at Caroline Church. Those who have attended a Cursillo weekend in the Diocese and sometimes those who are interested in knowing more about Cursillo come and join in prayer, song, and reflec-tion with other Episcopalians in our area. There is usual-ly a witness talk given, prayer and praise music sung, and a mini-grouping time. We are in need of one or more coordinators to keep the evenings on track. Please pray about this ministry and use the gifts God has given you to help others. See Sue Seel, Len Calone, or Cn. Richard for more information.

Vestry Highlights November

Caroline Church Outreach Funds for 2013 were allo-

cated to numerous charities; Many thanks to Bob and Sue Nalewajk for preparing

a delicious autumn meal for over one hundred people for our Ministries and Stewardship Celebration;

The 2014 Stewardship Campaign’s success was due to the prayerful dedication and diligence of Claire Mis and her committee;

The Vestry Nominating Committee is continuing to look for candidates for the upcoming election;

Invitations to the Epiphany Ball will be mailed short-ly. Please join us for a wonderful evening.

Lorraine Massie

Clerk of the Vestry

Parish Family News

Congratulations to Bruce & Jennifer Davis, and grandma Caroline Ennis, on the birth of their son, Cristian

Ronald Davis born on 11/19/13 at 12:10am. 7 pounds, 10 oz. All are doing well!

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Parishioner News Events: Please send items of interest (weddings, accomplishments etc.) to Maritza Groth at

mlgroth@aol.com or Irene Ruddock at peace2429@optonline.net

Submitting photos is encouraged!

Both your happy news and news of other life changes such as a loss of a close family member will be shared through this col-umn when you let us know to do so. As a Christian family, we will be closer if we can share our life joys and struggles with one another.

Liturgical Calendar November

Baptisms: Brett Andrew McMillan Burial: Ella Hill Meister