Issue 67 November 2012

Peter Charters – President, Hon

General Secretary, Trustee. Colin

Dyke – Chairman, Hon Treasurer,

Senior British League Manager, Veterans National League Manager,

Team Kit Manager, Trustee. Eric Van Looy – Membership Secretary,

Welfare and Child Protection Officer, Events Organiser, Trophy

Secretary. Nick Heaps – Coaching Officer, Junior British League

Manager, Junior and Cadet National League Manager, Trustee. Allen

Pack – Building and Equipment Officer, Website Manager, Robot

Master, Committee Member. Roger Woolven-Allen – Newsletter

Editor. Richard Fifield – Assistant Treasurer. Andy Yon –

Committee Member, Social Event Co-ordinator, Lost Property

Organiser. Peter Bradley – Committee Member. Sylvia Bruton –

League Play Co-ordinator, Reading League Secretary, Premier Club

Contact, Clubmark Contact, Volunteer Co-ordinator. Allan Bruton – Bookings Secretary,

Bracknell League Secretary. Brian Halliday – Club Discount Scheme Coordinator. Marion

Dyke – Cleaning Supervisor. David Duncan – Table Manager. Nigel Lynch – Auditor.

(Vacancies exist for Publicity Officer and Minutes Secretary)

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Hi again! I hope that you are not finding the recent quick-fire spate of

newsletters “over-the-top”. Because we are no longer limited too much by the cost of

production, it makes sense to publish whenever there is something

worth talking about. And, for many of us, the local leagues make up

the most interesting parts of the world of table tennis. Sure, it’s

good to know how England’s and Europe’s top players perform but, for most of us, such Olympians

live in another world. What happened when Paul Jarvis squared up to Daniel Grover, or why Stuart

Mitchell lost to Roy Hull, makes for much more interesting reading.

I wrote to Nigel Maltby asking permission to swipe snippets from his excellent newspaper

reports and this permission was duly granted. You will find these extracts later on in this issue.

Nigel has just tied the knot with a young lady who is one of his work colleagues. He tells me

that she has no table tennis connections, although he did let her beat him once on holiday (yeah, right…

Ed.). The happy couple have already been together for six years and they were married in June. They

honeymooned across Scotland, travelling between Edinburgh, Inverness, Loch Ness and the Isle of

Skye – and then home via the English county of Cumbria. Nigel says that they enjoyed a brilliant trip

and thoroughly enjoyed the fantastic scenery. They can’t wait to go back, he says.

I am sure that all readers of Kingfisher News will join with me in sending Nigel and his bride somewhat belated

congratulations and wishing them all the very best for a long and happy married life.

(The picture, by the way, shows Nigel posing at the top of the Aviemore ski resort, situated within the Cairngorms

National Park.)

Other major items in this issue include some great reports, kindly supplied by Nick Heaps, concerning

Kingfisher’s National Cadet and National Junior League teams. It’s always good to hear how the youngsters are

progressing.

There are a few Team Captains’ reports and I include only those that I have received. As you know, I tried to

write Allen Pack’s report for him last time and made a complete mess if it! I have learned from experience! Missing

contributions have not been downgraded to “Failed Absent Report”, or the acronym FAR, because captains did not really

expect to have to have to write anything at this time of year. But, to those who did respond, I send my grateful thanks.

Appreciated!

On Page 4 you will see a picture of Andy Yon playing our sport with a somewhat voluptuous young lady. If you

think that the male table tennis play looks more like your friendly Editor than Andy, I can assure you that it is simply a

trick of the light.

You will also find a letter from Patrick Burns along with “The Thoughts of Chairman Dyke”. There are stories

about two or three of our more flamboyant members and ex-members and also a few articles stolen from other

publications. There are also the usual “funnies” and similar snippets, mostly contributed by you, the reader.

Brian Halliday has come up with some really great stuff about Maria Tsaptsinos, for which I thank him. You will

hear much more about this young lady as time goes by. Somewhere along the way, you will also find the latest table

tennis quiz.

I have also scoured the various websites for “performances and averages”, some of which may either interest or

appal you, as well as a few national ranking details. I am under no illusion that these statistics are totally comprehensive

and so I crave your pardon if your personal details are, unfortunately, omitted. I have done me best, guv…

But, as always, you are cordially invited to read on… (Ed.)

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with three absolutely amazing You Tube clips. This is table tennis as you have rarely

seen it before. Jan-Ove Waldner does not appear in any of these clips but, had he

done so, he would not have been disappointed with his own performance. Peter

wonders if they show how Daniel Moses learned a few of his exhibition-type defence

tricks. He could well be right. Go on, have a look. You know you want to…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxZ-5wELSJM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luVfBZ7I2Mk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8IVASo0umU - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

On several occasions recently, various responsible Club

members have arrived at erstwhile unoccupied Kingfisher premises to

find (a) windows left wide open, (b) the main front door not

deadlocked, (c) lights left on, (d) various items of dirty crockery left in

the kitchen area and (d) the toilets not flushed away.

Andy Yon, in his own inimitable style, has suggested how the people who leave the Club in

this condition should be dealt with. While Andy’s solutions are admirable (and I can only nod in

approval), I fear that his suggested punishments would probably result in the culprits finishing up in

A&E, the Club being closed and Andy being thrown in jail.

However, while putting such radical solutions aside

(especially as we don’t know the identity of the culprits), this is a

very serious matter indeed. The Club has been broken into before

and we really don’t want it to happen again. To leave doors

unlocked and windows wide open is grossly irresponsible and just

asking for trouble. Please, please make sure that when you

personally leave the premises, all security matters are appropriately

dealt with. It only takes a minute or two to check the windows and

doors, and to make sure that the lights are all switched off.

As far as crockery and toilets are concerned, there is just one question for us to all ask ourselves. Would we leave

our own houses in this condition? If your answer is “yes”, then I am glad that I don’t live with you. If your answer is

“no”, do you not think that you are being a tiny bit selfish? Please give it some thought. Thank you. (Ed.)

YOUNGSTERS

COMPETE IN

NATIONAL CADET

LEAGUE 14

th October 2012: A young and inexperienced Kingfisher side, with an average

age of only 12, performed very creditably in the National Cadet League at

Cippenham this weekend.

Playing in one of the top divisions and competing against sides from

Chiltern, Ashford and Horsham, Kingfisher’s team (from left to right) of Alex

Squire, Joe Barraclough and Bertie Coombes had to compete against far more

experienced opponents. After losing to a much older Chiltern side, the boys bounced

back with a 5-4 victory against Ashford before narrowly going down, in a closely-

contended battle, to the team from Horsham. Although everyone had personal

successes, Kingfisher’s star performer this weekend was probably Alex Squire, a

pupil at Forest School in Winnersh. Playing in his very first competitive event, 12-

year-old Alex led the team with a most respectable 44% win ration.

For those wishing to watch our juniors competing, the Cadet team (Under

15) will be playing their next matches (all at Cippenham, Slough) on the Sundays of

18th November, 3

rd February and 17

th March. For further details, please contact Chris Squire.

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8-1 IS THE SCORE IN

NATIONAL JUNIOR

LEAGUE

20th

October 2012: An inexperienced Kingfisher team won two of their three matches in

the National Junior League (Under 18s) at Cippenham this weekend. Having beaten

Chiltern 8-1 and following up with a terrific win by the same margin against Horsham,

Kingfisher – represented (from left

to right) James Ellicott, Antony

Talbot and Isaac Farnworth – fell by

the same 8-1 scoreline to a very

strong Kidlington team who now top

the division.

In what was Antony’s first

ever competitive outing – and only

Isaac’s second – the boys excelled themselves against far more experienced

opposition with James and Isaac winning 67% of their matches whilst Antony

weighed in wqith five wins from nine (56%).

With Mikes Jones and Kevin Guring likely to supplement the NJL squad in the next series of matches, you can watch the

team playing at Cippenham, Slough, on the following Saturdays: 1st December, 26

th January and 2

nd March. For further details,

please contact Nick Heaps.

Note: The picture on the right shows James Elicott (far end) competing against Kidlington. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I was recently watching Andy “Killem” Yon playing

Rogerio Albelo when I observed our Brazilian friend come up

with a particularly good shot.

“Well played, Rodge!” called Andy.

“Oi!” I interrupted, “that’s MY name.”

The game over, the four of us (Allen Pack was there) discussed names. Rogerio told us

that names are never abbreviated in Brazil, no matter how friendly people may be, although he

insisted that he wasn’t the slightest bit offended by the way we did such things here in the UK.

Rogerio went on to say that his name should be pronounced “hodge-air-rio” (or

something very like that) and my pea-brain immediately leapt on to a compromise.

“To satisfy the Portuguese pronunciation,” I said, “and also to use a friendly British abbreviation, I reckon

Rogerio should be called ‘Hodge’. What do you think?”

Rogerio said he certainly didn’t mind, provided that ‘hodge’ didn’t mean anything nasty. None of us could think

of anything untoward, but I double-checked when I got home. The nearest I could find was “hodgeheg”, which is a spiky

little animal found in people’s gardens. Ergo, no offence. So “Hodge” it is. (Ed.)

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We are delighted to confirm that Kingfisher has renewed its contract with Tees Sport up to the end of 2015. Tees

Sport provides kit for our British League and National League teams and provides members with generous discounts on

all clothing and equipment. We are continuing to work with Tees Sport on special projects and, if anyone has any ideas,

Chairman Colin would be pleased to hear from you.

Our appointed agent is Brian Halliday. Brian may be contacted on (0118) 972 2421, via email at

brianhalliday2@aol.com or by Royal Mail at 2 Rowan Close, Sonning Common RG4 9LD.

Tees Sport has agreed to supply Butterfly, Karlsson, Andro and Adidas equipment via Brian with a 25% discount.

Donic equipment is available with a 20% discount while the remainder of Tees Sport’s merchandise (with the exception of

tables) attracts a 15% discount.

Tees Sport is a leading supplier of specialist table tennis equipment in the United Kingdom, offering a wide range

of most of the leading brands. Tees Sport is the largest retailers of Butterfly specialist equipment and Butterfly is the

leading brand of blades and rubber.

World Champion Zhang Jike, European Champion Timo Boll, and most of the England Team use Butterfly blades

and rubbers.

You will find Tees Sport staff knowledgeable and helpful. All

of their sales staff have been involved in table tennis for many years

and have played the game to at least British League standard. The

Company offers a same day shipment service for orders placed by

telephone, internet or mail. Brian Halliday is the agent for Tees Sport

in the Kingfisher Club and can place orders on members’ behalf, or provide advice, if required.

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2222ndndndnd October 2012 October 2012 October 2012 October 2012 You’ll never win

if you don’t move

your bat, Mr Yon

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Well, there I was, absolutely starkers, looking in the

bedroom mirror. I was not happy with what I saw. I said to

wifey Lin, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. Can YOU

find anything good to say about me?”

Lin replied, “Well, there’s nothing wrong with your eyesight.”

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The following snippets have all been

extracted from Nigel Maltby’s excellent weekly

Reading Post articles. Great stuff, Nige! (Ed.)

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19th

September 2012: Kingfisher A cruised to a

comfortable 10-0 victory at Sonning Common &

Peppard A in their opening Reading and District League Division 1 match.

Mark Banks, Stuart Williams and Hari Gehlot all secured hat-tricks with Jason

Roberts, Paul Jarvis and Nigel Maltby unable to stop the Woodley side.

In Division 2, Kingfisher D managed a good 7-3 win against Wokingham A

thanks to a fine maximum from Colin Dyke, who rounded off a good evening’s work by

defeating Brian Chinneck 11-9 7-11 9-11 11-9 11-7.

Ivor Hardman managed two wins and Sharon Mitchell picked up a single.

Phil Mead and John Morris both got maximums as Kingfisher E won 8-2 at

Sonning Common & Peppard C.

Morris’s battling 11-8 11-9 6-11 6-11 11-5 win over Tim Raby proved crucial.

In Division 4, Gianpaolo Balsamo beat Cedric Dias 11-9 12-10 10-12 7-11 11-9

to put Kingfisher H on course to a 7-3 win at Our Lady of Peace G.

Richard Neville and Tony Eames both got hat-tricks as Wokingham B beat

Kingfisher I 7-3.

In Division 6, Diane Taylor, Leigh Mahoney and Phil Cunnington proved too strong for Sonning Common &

Peppard G’s two players as Kingfisher J won 10-0.

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26th

September 2012: In Division 2, Leo Long showed how much he has improved with a fine hat-trick as Kingfisher F

drew 5-5 at Tidmasrh B.

Leo beat Lee Calcutt and François Durand before earning an 11-6 11-13 11-13 11-9 11-9 win over Steve

Callidine.

In Division 3, Milestone A enjoyed a 6-4 win at Kingfisher G thanks to a Robin Benwell treble.

Mark Bullion and Alistair Richardson both won twice as OLOP G drew 5-5 with Kingfisher H in Division 4.

John Creighton managed a treble for Kingfisher that included a marathon 6-11 11-9 11-5 7-11 13-11 win against

Richardson to put his team 3-1 up. However, Bullion snatched a point for his side with a win over Andrew Talaga.

In Division 6, Kingfisher K came from 3-2 down to win 7-3 at Milestone C, Gheorghe Milea winning all three of

his matches alongside a double from Simon Lang.

Leigh Mahoney’s treble and two from Phil Cunnington saw Kingfisher J beat Birch Copse C 7-3.

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3rd

October 2012: In Division 1, Daniel McTiernan and Sean Pickin both got maximums as OLOP C won 8-2 at

Kingfisher B.

Neil Hurford’s treble and a double from Keith Winter saw YMCA win 6-4 at Kingfisher C, with Winter sealing

victory by defeating Steve Murgatroyd 10-12 14-12 11-8 11-8.

A strong Kingfisher A team of Elson Costa, Tony Reynolds and Hari Gehlot blitzed OLOP B 10-0 to stay top of

the table.

In Division 2, John Simmonds’s stylish three-straight maximum and a Denise Weller brace helped Post Office A

to a 7-3 win at Kingfisher E. Weller defeated Dave Gostelow 11-3 8-11 7-11 11-9 16-14 before gaining a notable win

against Alland Bruton 5-11 11-9 6-11 11-6 11-5.

Lee Calcutt was back to his best form with a hat-trick for Tidmarsh B, but doubles from Ivor Hardman, Trevor

Organ and Colin Dyke saw Kingfisher D win the match 7-3.

In Division 3, Phil Burke and Seth Martin both starred as Springfield A continue to surprise after their 6-4 win

over Kingfisher G. Martin sealed the win in the final set by beating Rogerio Albelo 5-11 11-5 11-8 4-11 11-9 in a match

that could have gone either way.

In Division 4, Kingfisher H won 6-4 at Sonning Sports A thanks to another hat-trick from Jean-Noël Thepaut

which were all won in three straight games.

In Division 6, OLOP I defeated Kingfisher K 10-0 to maintain their 100% record.

André Bartlett made his first appearance for Kingfisher J as they fought out a draw with Springfield C. There was

a treble for Springfield’s Ludovic Couillard.

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10th

October 2012: Mark Banks beat Ian Cole 11-5 11-4 11-5 to earn Kingfisher A a 6-4 win over champions OLOP A

in Division 1 of the Reading & District League. Danny Moses completed a hat-trick for OLOP, which included a thrilling

5-11 12-14 11-3 13-11 12-10 win over Hari Gehlot.

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17th

October 2012: In Division 1, Kingfisher A were 10-0 winners against Kingfisher B, but they were involved in a

much closer contest with Tidmarsh A, which they won 6-4.

Steve De-Reimer’s maximum for Tidmarsh included an 11-7 11-7 10-12 7-11 11-5 win over Hari Gehlot.

A good win over Nick Heaps was a small consolation for Lisa Williams as her Kingfisher C side lost 2-8 to Polish

A.

Kingfisher D stay top of Division 2 after their inter-club win against Kingfisher E 6-4, Ivor Hardman and Trevor

Organ both winning twice.

Tidmarsh C continued their flying start with a 7-3 victory at Kingfisher F.

In Division 3, Nigel Rowlands was the Tilehurst Methodists A match winner against Kingfisher G. He defeated

Eric Holmes 5-11 11-7 11-4 11-3 in the final set of the night to seal a 6-4 victory.

Tilehurst had led 4-0 before being pulled back to 5-4 on their way to securing their first win of the season.

In Division 4, Birch Copse A cruised to a 10-0 victory against Kingfisher I, Jes Eassom, Richard Green and

Simon Clarke all with three-straight trebles.

Yet another three-straight maximum from Jean-Noël Thepaut and doubles from Gianpaolo Balsamo and Gabor

Radnoti helped Kingfisher H to an 8-2 win at Tilehurst Methodists C, for whom Catherine Venning won twice.

Division 6 side Kingfisher J defeated club-mates Kingfisher K 7-3.

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24th

October 2012: Barry Carter and Andy Stephens both recorded maximums as Tidmarsh C secured a fine 9-1 win

over Kingfisher D in a Reading League Division 2 top-of-the-table clash.

Colin Dyke had got kingfisher off to a great start by beating Duncan Groves 11-9 in the fifth, but Tidmarsh hit

back in style with Carter beating Dyke 2-11 11-5 7-11 11-6 11-6 in one of many key matches.

Curzon Club A stayed unbeaten after beating Kingfisher F 6-4, with Mick Maynard and John Willcocks both

starring.

In Division 1, a terrific maximum from Jason Roberts helped Sonning Common & Peppard A draw with

Kingfisher B as both teams picked up their first top-flight point of the season in a match that neither deserved to lose.

In a nerve-jangling final set, Paul Jarvis saved three set points before beating Dan Grover 11-4 11-13 3-11 11-9

13-11.

In Division 3, Kingfisher G claimed their first points of the season with a 6-4 win over Sonning Common &

Peppard D as they came from 2-1 down to win five sets in a row and secure a winning 6-2 lead.

Allen Pack led the way with a battling maximum, while Carol Byers and Rogerio Albelo had a win each.

In Division 4, Kingfisher H enjoyed a 6-4 win over Curzon Club C to maintain their promotion push.

They led 3-0 and 5-4 before Joaquin Munoz-Sabatier defeated Mick Gillard 11-9 11-7 11-13 9-11 11-3 in the

final set of the night.

There was a three-set straight double for Bob Winter as Tilehurst Methodists C eased to an 8-2 win over

Kingfisher I.

In Division 6, Kingfisher K beat Birch Copse C 7-3. Simon Lang, Stuart Mitchell and Jean Francois Gueganton

all won twice, while Roy Hull hit another treble for Birch Copse.

Leigh Mahoney and Diane Taylor both got trebles as Kingfisher J defeated Tilehurst Methodists D 7-3.

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31st October 2012: In Division 1, Kingfisher A made it six wins out of six by defeating Kingfisher C 9-1. Stuart

Williams held off Steve Murgatroyd in a tense first set 10-12 11-8 12-10 8-11 13-11, while later Murgatroyd managed a

good win against Tony Reynolds.

Sonning Common & Peppard B beat Kingfisher B 7-3 for their first win of the season. Keith Swain’s treble

included a 7-11 12-10 18-20 11-6 11-8 defeat of Richard Fifield.

But the following night Sonning Common & Peppard B lost 9-1 to Kingfisher C, who were picking up their first

two-point haul. Steve Murgatroyd and Niall McGrane both notched maximums with good support coming from Lisa

Williams.

In the Reading League’s team handicap competition, Post Office A won 5-4 at Kingfisher H.

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Please be reminded that the Berkshire Closed

Championships take place at Kingfisher over the weekend of

24th/25

th November. The closing date is 9

th November. If you

wish to take part, please send your entry form to Tournament Secretary Sylvia Bruton as a matter of some urgency.

The following snippet has been extracted from the newsletter of the

Veterans’ English Table Tennis Society. It was written

by dear old Brian Halliday. John Glew, as some of you

may remember, was once a staunch member of our own

Kingfisher Club.

“Many (VETTS) members will recall the contributions made in the early years by John

Glew. I had a ‘phone call from John recently and, although he doesn’t play regularly –

keeping his efforts to winning the table tennis competitions on cruise ships – he still follows our progress closely. He

asked to be remembered to all those who knew him. He now lives in Taunton.”

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The following

extracts have been taken

from the VETTS’ lists

dated October 2012.

Included are players not only from Berkshire, but also a few special others representing other

counties. These latter people may well be remembered from their Berkshire, Reading and

(especially) their Kingfisher days. Some of these “others”, of course, still play locally.

VETERAN MEN (Over 40): 19 David Barr. 23 Hari Gehlot . 69 Andrew Misseldine. 70 Mark Banks. 111

David Crowley. 133 Mike Rhodes. 147 Paul Beck. 161 Edward Herrity. 165 Graham Outrim. 172 Keith Falconer. 175

David Streak. 190 Nick Heaps. 194 Derek Wood. 200 Anthony Brown. 225 John Barclay. 289 John Milward. 290

Richard Fifield. 299 Richard Rosinski. 311 Alan Cummings. 314 Dave Gilham. 317 Colin Dyke. 326 Keith Swain.

332 Graham Trimming. 344 Andy Yon.

VETERAN WOMEN (Over 40): 1 Sue Collier. 41 Denise Weller. 43 Sharon Mitchell. 67 Gill Knightley. 92

Denise Rolfe. 94 Wendy Porter. 97 Susan Willson. 113 Sylvia Bruton.

VETERAN MEN (Over 50): 64 Eddie Herrity. 72 Andrew Misseldine. 78 Graham Outrim. 83 Mike Rhodes.

86 Derek Wood. 91 John Barclay. 101 Nick Heaps. 137 John Millward. 149 Peter Bradley. 150 Clive Dawson. 188

Dave Gostelow.

VETERAN MEN (Over 60): 13 Dave Crowley. 15 Paul Beck. 19 Eddie Herrity. 31 Graham Outrim. 43

Derek Wood. 45 John Barclay. 60 Nick Heaps. 80 John Millward. 87 Peter Bradley. 94 Colin Dyke. 118 Clive

Dawson, 128 Dave Gostelow. 156 Mike Dorrington.

VETERAN MEN (Over 70): 1 Dave Crowley. 8 Tony Brown. 32 Peter Bradley. 34 Colin Dyke. 61 David

Gostelow. 73 Mike Dorrington. 106 Brian Halliday.

VETERAN MIXED (Over 80): 18 Mike Dorrington.

VETERAN WOMEN (Over 50): 24 Sharon Mitchell. 33 Gill Knightley. 38 Denise Weller. 49 Pam Spooner.

80 Jean Gloster. 81 Diane Taylor. 82 Eve Franey.

VETERAN WOMEN (Over 60): 14 Gill Knightley. 31 Pam Spooner. 46 Eve Franey. 48 Jean Gloster. 59

Diane Taylor.

VETERAN WOMEN (Over 70): 14 Jean Gloster.

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Please find, below, the player

averages for both the Reading and the Bracknell

Leagues, as at 30th October 2012. I hope you find

them of interest. I was particularly impressed by

my own Reading entry…

READING DIVISION 1: Tony Reynolds (Kingfisher A) 8/9 = 89%. Elson Costa (Kingfisher A) 8/9 = 89%.

Stuart Williams (Kingfisher A) 10/12 = 83%. Hari Gehlot (Kingfisher A) 10/12 = 83%. Mark Banks (Kingfisher A) 9/12

= 75%. Steve Murgatroyd (Kingfisher C) 8/15 = 53%. Niall McGrane (Kingfisher C) 6/15 = 40%. Lisa Williams

(Kingfisher C) 5/15 = 33%. Richard Fifield (Kingfisher B) 4/12 = 33%. Geoff Civil (Kingfisher B) 2/9 = 22%. Daniel

Grover (Kingfisher B) 2/12 = 17%. Roger Woolven-Allen (Kingfisher B) 1/12 = 8%.

READING DIVISION 2: Phil Mead (Kingfisher E) 8/9 = 89%. Leo Long (Kingfisher F) 8/9 = 89%. Ivor

Hardman (Kingfisher D) 10/12 = 83%. John Morris (Kingfisher E) 4/6 = 67%. Allan Bruton (Kingfisher E) 4/6 = 67%.

Peter Bennett (Kingfisher E) 2/3 = 67%. Colin Dyke (Kingfisher D) 9/15 = 60%. Ashish Bahuguna (Kingfisher F) 7/12

= 58%. Trevor Organ (Kingfisher D) 6/12 = 50%. Dave Gostelow (Kingfisher E) 4/12 = 33%. Michael Houghton

(Kingfisher F) 4/12 = 33%. Sharon Mitchell (Kingfisher D) 1/6 = 17%. Mike Dorrington (Kingfisher F) 1/6 = 17%.

Steve Woolnough (Kingfisher F) 0/6 = 0%.

READING DIVISION 3: Allen Pack (Kingfisher G) 10/12 = 83%. Carol Byers

(Kingfisher G) 4/9 = 44%. Eric Ho,mes (Kingfisher G) 3/9 = 33%. Dave Duncan (Kingfisher

G) 1/3 = 33%. Rogerio Albelo (Kingfisher G) 3/12 = 25%.

READING DIVISION 4: Jean-Noël Thepaut (Kingfisher H)11/11 = 100%). John

Creighton (Kingfisher I) 4/6 = 67%. Gianpaolo Balsamo (Kingfisher H) 6/12 = 50%. Nils

Wedi (Kingfisher H) 3/6 = 50%. Joaquin Munoz-Sabater (Kingfisher H) 3/6 = 50%. Andrew

Talaga (Kingfisher I) 4/9 = 44%. Gabor Radnoti (Kingfisher H) 3/9 = 33%. Ken Robb

(Kingfisher I) 1/6 = 17%. Derek Spice (Kingfisher I) 1/12 = 8%. Derek Crombie (Kingfisher

I) 1/12 = 8%.

READING DIVISION 6: Leigh Mahoney (Kingfisher J) 11/11 = 100%. Simon Lang (Kingfisher K) 7/9 =

78%. Gheorghe Milea (Kingfisher K) 9/12 = 75%. Phil Cunnington (Kingfisher J) 8/11 = 73%. Diane Taylor

(Kingfisher J) 10/14 = 71%. Gill Bennett (Kingfisher J) 4/6 = 67%. André Bartlett (Kingfisher J) 5/9 = 56%. Jean-

François Gueganton (Kingfisher K) 3/9 = 33%. Stuart Mitchell (Kingfisher K) 2/12 = 17%. Glenn Carver (Kingfisher K)

0/6 = 0%. Piotr Kuchta (Kingfisher K) 0/6 = 0%.

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BRACKNELL PREMIER DIVISION: John Willcocks (Kingfisher A) 9/9 = 100%. Jeffrey Huggins

(Kingfisher B) 3/3 = 100%. Graham Outrim (Kingfisher C) 6/6 = 100%. Phil Mead (Kingfisher A) 10/12 = 83%. Ivor

Hardman (Kingfisher C) 8/12 = 67%. Colin Dyke (Kingfisher B) 6/9 = 67%. Roger Woolven-

Allen (Kingfisher A) 5/9 = 56%. Jeffrey Huggins (Kingfisher C) 5/9 = 56%. Allan Bruton

(Kingfisher C) 5/9 = 56%. John Morris (Kingfisher A) 3/6 = 50%. Ashish Bahaguna (Kingfisher

D) 6/12 = 50%. Allen Pack (Kingfisher D) 3/6 = 50%. Peter Bennett (Kingfisher B) 7/15 = 47%.

Michael Houghton (Kingfisher D) 5/12 = 42%. Trevor Organ (Kingfisher D) 2/6 = 33%. Geoff

Civil (Kingfisher A) 3/9 = 33%. Allan Bruton (Kingfisher B) 1/3 = 33%. Richard Fifield

(Kingfisher B) 1/6 = 17%. Trevor Organ (Kingfisher B) 0/3 = 0%. Sharon Mitchell (Kingfisher B)

0/6 = 0%.

BRACKNELL DIVISION 1: Ken Robb (Kingfisher E) 4/9 = 44%. John Creighton

(Kingfisher E) 4/9 = 44%. Dave Duncan (Kingfisher E) 3/8 = 38%. Derek Crombie (Kingfisher E) 1/12 = 8%. Gill

Bennett (Kingfisher E) 0/3 = 0%. Derek Spicer (Kingfisher E) 0/3 = 0%.

BRACKNELL DIVISION 2: Sylvia Bruton (Kingfisher F) 2/3 = 67%. Helen Sparks (Kingfisher F) 2/3 =

67%. Gill Bennett (Kingfisher F) 4/9 = 44%. David Wells (Kingfisher F) 2/9 = 22%. Gwynneth Penny (Kingfisher F)

1/12 = 8%.

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If, like many of us, you like to arrange the occasional practice session

with one or more of your pals, it may pay to have a quick squint at the Club’s

Table Diary to confirm that there are no prior bookings. The printed version at

the Club may or may not be up to date but, or so Nick

Heaps reliably informs me, the online version (the Club’s

website refers) should be.

Not only does the Club become involved in League Matches, but there are school

bookings, coaching classes, training camps and various weekend events. I know that, in theory,

one table should always be available for practice purposes unless (and here’s the great “get-out”

clause) special events sometimes require the use of the whole Club. Rather obviously, internal

events such as the Summer Grand Prix and Club tournaments require the use of the entire playing

area. When the Club is “leased” to outside bodies such as the local leagues and the Berkshire

TTA, then it would be rather unreasonable to expect freedom to practise at the same time.

And so, as per the above suggestion, have a peek at the website before trotting off to the Club. It could well save

you a wasted journey.

KINGFISHER TABLE DIARY: Following on from the above, here are the major bookings, looking forward a

month, as at 30th October 2012: Rather obviously, bookings can and do change as time goes by, so please double-check

with the website! Please note that I have omitted the Tuesday and Friday Clubs (1000-1230) because everyone is

welcome at these sessions!!

NOVEMBER 2012: Thursday 1st: 0915-1045 Addington School. 1300-1900 Junior Training Camp. Monday

5th: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. Tuesday 6

th: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. Wednesday 7

th: 1700-1900 Junior

Coaching/Practice. Thursday 8th: 0915-1045 Addington School. 1300-1400 Bulmershe School. There are three league

matches scheduled for this evening. Saturday 10th: 0930-1900 County matches. Monday 12

th r: 1700-1900 Junior

Coaching. Tuesday 13th : 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. Wednesday 14

th: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching/Practice. Thursday

15th: 0915-1045 Addington School. 1045-1400 Bulmershe School. There are three league matches scheduled for this

evening. Monday 19th: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. Tuesday 20

th: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. Wednesday 21

st: 1700-

1900 Junior Coaching/Practice. Thursday 22nd

: 0915-1045 Addington School. There are three league matches scheduled

for this evening. Saturday 24th: 0900-1900 Berkshire Closed Championships. Sunday 25

th: Berkshire Closed

Championships. Monday: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. There are three league matches scheduled for this evening.

Tuesday 27th : 1700-1900 Junior Coaching. Wednesday 28

th: 1700-1900 Junior Coaching/Practice. Thursday 29

th: 0915-

1045 Addington School. There are three league matches scheduled for this evening.

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The following has been extracted from the October/November

issue of Caversham Park’s Village Voice:

“Our summer practice has now ended

and a new season begins. Our plea for more

players via Village Voice has had results with several seniors and plenty of juniors coming

forward from the village. So many juniors, in fact, that we commissioned another table to take us

up to a total of four tables. We also had to extend to another night for seniors only! Is this the

Olympic effect?

“Our efforts were almost derailed early on with our principal coach, High Crossfield,

breaking his arm. An approach to the Reading League fortunately gained us the services of

professional coach Wendy Porter. Ably dealing with the juniors, she proved our saviour for July

and August. Our grateful thanks to her. She will also be taking an interest in our juniors as she

organises the Youth Division.”

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What goes through YOUR mind while you are playing your favourite

sport? Most of us keep such thoughts to ourselves,

especially as we are all guilty, from time to time, of

a certain amount of hypocrisy. The verbal

expression “Great shot!” can often roughly

translate into the mental equivalent of “Jammy ratbag.”

John Barclay is an exception. I haven’t bumped into John for a long time but, unless he

has dramatically changed, his running commentary during a match puts John Motson or David

Coleman firmly into the shade.

And it is just possible that Colin Dyke may regret letting me into the secrets of his

innermost thoughts! Here, then, are some of “The Thoughts Of Chairman Colin”…

The occasion: Reading Division 2. Kingfisher D versus Tidmarsh B. Tidmarsh’s Lee Calcutt had already defeated Ivor Hardman and Trevor Organ with comparative ease but, in his

third and final match against Colin Dyke, the young chap was virtually down and out. (Please be aware that, because of

the late hour, play was taking place on two tables.) Colin was leading by two games to one and by ten points to five. All

over bar the shouting, eh? Here’s what went through Colin’s mind at the time:

“I’m 2-1 and 10-5 up.

“I am playing well. I can’t believe it.

“The others haven’t noticed I’ve won this. They will be surprised.

“I’ve still got my 100% average. I’ll have to get on to the website tomorrow to make sure they’ve got it right.

“Good win this. I haven’t beaten Lee in years.

“I wonder if I’ll get mentioned in the paper.

“He’s gone to pieces and just finds me unplayable.

“Poor chap’s probably got to go to work tomorrow and it’s getting past his bedtime.

“I don’t think I’ll hang my bat up yet, not after this.

“I hope he takes his defeat well. He’s already lost to Leo in the previous match (I would expect that now).

“What serve shall I give him to finish him off? I know; the fast one to his backhand. He’s missed most of those

tonight by trying to run round and hit it with his forehand.

“Must concentrate and take my time.”

What happened next: “I served off and my 10-5 lead gradually turned into a 10-12 loss.

“Lee took the fifth and deciding end 11-7.”

“It’s a funny old game as you know but even after playing for 58 years I still have lessons to learn.”

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SKIING: The sport of skiing consists of wearing £2,000-worth of clothes and equipment and driving 200 miles

in the snow in order to stand around a bar and get drunk.

A good one from tonight. Niall was walking just pass the big

first aid box when he asked, "Anyone know where there is a plaster?"

Allan Bruton, with a certain aplomb, replied, "The first aid box

is not a bad place to start.”

To which Niall immediately responded with, "Well I AM Irish".

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I have already put in my two penn’orth on this subject (please

see Page 2) but, below, you will find the text of the official email sent

out to all members by Eric van Looy. If you DISAGREE with anything

Eric says, I’d dearly love to hear from you… (Ed.)

Dear Kingfisher club members,

We all hope you are enjoying your membership this season and have been able to

enjoy the new club facilities already.

However, please allow us to point out that we'd like every member to take care of

our great club venue as if it were your own home.

We have had instances of open windows in the playing area,

bottles/glasses/mugs/plates that have not been cleared or washed up or moved

barriers/tables that were not placed back.

In case you find the playing area too warm, you are fully entitled to open a window

in the playing area, but please do not forget to close it once you've finished playing.

Equally, if you notice an open window, and you are leaving the club, please close it before you lock up. In the worst case

scenario, people with bad intentions could take advantage of an unlocked window, which is something we would like to

avoid. So please look around you before you leave the club, do not assume that someone else after you will close it later.

With regards to left crockery/glasses or unwashed dishes, this is a matter of cleanliness. We do not have a

dedicated housekeeping team who will wash the dishes for us, which is why we need to take responsibility for keeping the

club tidy and a pleasant place we want to come to. The same goes for moved barriers/tables: please think about the people

who come after you, who would like to use the club in the same state as you found it.

Tidiness = happiness! (very corny, but true!!!)

On behalf of the committee, we thank you in advance for your assistance in this matter! With all your help, we

can keep Kingfisher the leading club it has been and will be for the years to come.

Kind regards, Eric van Looy (Membership Secretary)

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FROM PAUL CORNELL, ETTA PR & MARKETING OFFICER Dear Members,

As you may already be aware the Joola European Championships Qualification Match comes to Portsmouth this

November! It will see England's Men take on The Netherlands and is the last home fixture in their 2013 Qualification

campaign as they face difficult-looking away trips to Bulgaria and the Czech Republic in early 2013.

This event offers a rare opportunity to watch Olympians live on the South Coast. England’s number 1 Paul

Drinkhall will return to action after his place was confirmed in the England side. Drinkhall will be joining fellow

Olympian Liam Pitchford at the Mountbatten Leisure Centre, Alexandra Park on Tuesday 20th November, as well as

National Doubles Champion Daniel Reed, who is fresh from a career-best international win at the recent 2012 European

Championships.

Come down and support England in Portsmouth and enjoy a great evening's entertainment. There will be an

opportunity for fans and public alike to share a drink, listen to some music and play table tennis.

Tickets are still available and you can buy them from Mountbatten Leisure Centre or over the telephone

on: 02392 626509. For those of you who use Twitter - Please tweet using the hashtag #pompeyTT

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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher.

When Steve kindly sent me the

adjacent photograph for use with his

“Team Captain’s Report”, he described it

as “a picture of my other sport”.

Rather obviously, the shot shows Steve playing croquet, a game about

which I know next to nothing. They used to play it at the All-England Tennis Club

at Wimbledon (possibly they still do) and we more adventurous souls used to

whack a few balls about in Christine Basden’s back garden out at Burghfield,

before she shoved off to sunny Spain. The most competitive players, if I remember

aright, were Charlie Goddard and Gareth Evans (do you remember them?) and they

were masters at getting the ball round clumps of grass and mole-hills, and out of

flower-beds and shrubbery. But, as can be seen, Steve is troubled by neither

clumps of grass nor mole-hills! Steve is a proper player!

Steve is ranked 166 in the World at the sport of croquet and, although he

modestly played this down when we chatted about it, to have that sort of ranking at

any sport is quite something! I was impressed!

Do any other members play sports or games other than table tennis at a

high level? My tennis is on a par with my table tennis, so there is nothing worth

mentioning there, but I have heard that Dave Gostelow is pretty darned good at both dancing and bowls. And I have a

suspicion that there are a few top-class golfers lurking within the Kingfisher membership. It would be good to hear more

details from Steve, Dave or, indeed, other members who have their lights hidden under the proverbial bushels. You know

how to contact me! (Ed.)

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Many moons ago, before I became Editor of this fine publication, I told readers a story

relating to the time that our very own Niall McGrane was in the farming business. I doubt you will

remember too much about that particular event, but another “Tale From The Irish Past” has just

come to light.

One day, about twenty years ago, while Niall was driving from Kilbeggan to his

farmhouse just outside the town, his Land Rover unfortunately collided with a huge 18-wheeler lorry owned by transport

giant O’Burney’s of Tullamore. Niall, suffering from whiplash and quite severe lacerations, decided to sue for damages

and duly took the haulage company to court.

In the High Court of Athlone, O’Burney’s solicitor, one of the very best

in the land, fired a question at Niall.

“Didn’t you say to the garda, at the scene of the accident, that you felt

perfectly fine?” he demanded.

Niall replied, “Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I’d just loaded me

favourite cow, Bessie, into the trailer…”

“I didn’t ask for any details,” the solicitor interrupted. “Just answer the

question. Did you, or did you not, tell the police, at the scene of the accident,

that you felt fine?”

Niall said, “Well, I’d just got Bessie into the trailer, and I was driving

down the road…..”

The solicitor interrupted for a second time,

this time addressing his complaint to the judge.

“Objection. Your Honour, I am trying to establish

the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man

told the garda that he was absolutely fine. Now, several weeks after the accident, he is trying to

sue my client for substantial damages. I believe him to be a fraud. Please tell him to simply

answer the question.”

But, by this time, the judge found himself fascinated by Niall’s repeated answer and

said to the solicitor, “Objection over-ruled. I’d like to see what Mr McGrane has to say about

his favourite cow, Bessie.”

Niall thanked the judge and proceeded. “Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded poor old Bessie, me favourite

cow, into the trailer and I was driving her down the road when this huge O’Burney lorry came thundering through a stop

sign and hit my trailer right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. Bejasus, I was

hurt – very badly hurt – and I could hardly move. However, I could hear poor old Bessie moaning and groaning. I

knew she was in terrible pain just by the noise she was making. But I was so badly hurt meself I couldn’t get over to her.

“Ten minutes or so later, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning too,

so he went over to her. After he’d looked at her, and seen how badly injured she was, he took out his pistol and shot her

between the eyes.

“Then the policeman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, ‘And how are you feeling?’

“Now what the **** would YOU have said?”

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Four people have joined our illustrious ranks since the last issue of

Kingfisher News hit the streets. I am confident that I speak for the rest of the

membership when I say “Welcome!” to the following members: JOHNNY

COOMBES, ANDREW PARKER, LEE CALLER and BRYAN GLAZIER.

Great to have you with us!

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Well, there I was, leafing through this

Swiss sports magazine (as one does) when I

came across the cartoon to the left. I couldn’t

resist including it! For a final “groan”, though,

the penguins just have to be playing with

“Double Fish” equipment… (Ed.)

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ANOTHER LITTLE “PLUG”

FROM THE ETTA: Liam Pitchford took another scalp a

couple of weeks ago at the 2012 European

Championships, beating Robert Gardos (32) in

Denmark. The 19-year-old will hope to

continue his impressive form against

Netherlands in Portsmouth on Tuesday 20th

November. With fellow Olympian Paul Drinkhall also in action don’t forget to reserve your tickets with Mountbatten

Leisure Centre on 02392 626509.

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Hi Roger

I meant to thank

you for the

entertaining read

in your previous

pre-season edition. I think there were two references to me, so it certainly made me feel part of the Kingfisher clan (being

a Scotsman, I have to call it that). Anyway, no sooner do I feel part

of something, when unfortunately I now have to move on. Damn,

didn't even manage the opportunity to play (sorry lose) some games

in Div 1. I'm going north for the winter (yes I know, there must be

some Irish blood in me as well) to sunny Atherstone in the

Midlands. Unfortunately paid employment takes priority in my

case. So, this is my farewell note and yes I will miss the place and

the people (maybe even my fellow Kingfisher members as well).

On a serious note, though, I very much enjoyed my season

in Reading and I think it improved my standard of table tennis no

end. I can now hit the ball twice as fast as I used to and still hit the

table 40% of the time.....that's progress! Not only that, but those that miss usually fell the

odd player on the other side of the net. Well maybe the ones that

don't move so fast, like yourself. I shall however, always finish a

close second in that department to Andy Yon I suspect.

So finally, a special thanks to Steve Woolnough, Ken Robb, Mike Dorrington and Carol

Byers, for last season in Div 3 and good luck to my (brief) new team of Niall, Steve and Lisa for

the coming one.

Ciao, Pat

And my reply, hopefully on behalf of the general membership:

Hi Pat

Many thanks for your email. I am pleased that your career is progressing and I wish you all the very best for the

future.

However, I was sorry to hear that your new job is taking you away from the area and that you will be leaving

Kingfisher. You really have become part of the Club – in the same way as that other foreigner, Niall McGrane. Niall

actually wants to go back to Leinster but Irish Immigration are keeping a 24/7 vigil on all air- and seaports.

Please keep in touch, especially when and if you start playing table tennis again. Warwickshire table tennis

would be of interest to many members. I shall keep you in the newsletter loop, unless you instruct me otherwise.

All the very best, Roger.

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TSAPTSINOS SHOOTS UP RANKINGS (by Brian Halliday, 10

th October 2012)

Reading schoolgirl Maria Tsaptsinos has

made remarkable

progress in the ETTA

Senior Women’s

ranking list, leaping 39 places to 21st.

This follows the recent Guildford Grand Prix, where she won 19 of her 20 matches.

This was the Kingfisher player’s first serious attack on senior level players and she

claimed a number of notable scalps.

The 15-year-old is now aiming to reach the England Senior top 10 by the end of the

season.

Selection for England at junior level is another major target, but this will not be easy as

she has a number of rivals ranked above her.

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(by Brian Halliday, 24th October 2012)

When Maria Tsaptsinos arrived at Kingfisher it was really a case of "how do you solve a problem like Maria?"

From the start it was evident that this young lady had talent but

the attitude was not quite right. It was all a bit of a laugh to

Maria and I volunteered to be her coach.

At this stage I have to state that I thought my coaching

days were over. I had had considerable success with Ayonija

Sundararajan, when she represented England and also won a

National title. I was not sure if I could repeat this with the rather

volatile Maria. The challenge was to harness the talent to a very

bubbly personality and to find a way to instil the love of

continuous practice.

I have to say we hit it off right from the start. I knew it

would be a long process so we started in by making the game

fun. I gave her an increasing number of paper cups to aim at and

the challenge was to knock them off in a diminishing time scale

and with maximum force. She entered into the spirit with

enormous gusto. At this stage I was helped massively by Wally Allanson and Andy Yon, Their help every week was

essential. She started entering some fairly basic tournaments and was showing some fairly dramatic progress.

She was now showing an incredible will to win and was demonstrating a real controlled aggression. Successes

started coming quickly with wins at Cadet level (under 15) all over England. Maria became National Champion at Under

14 level and followed this up by winning the Under 15 title a year later. Her main rival over these years was her great

friend Tin Tin Ho, who was the England No.1. We were able to work on a plan to beat her and Maria went onto record

three major wins over her great rival.

I was now at the stage when it was necessary to ensure that she had the highest possible tuition. She attends

England squad training in London and Sheffield under the guidance of Alan Cooke, Desmond Douglas, Jason Sugrue

among others. To play top players is essential and in this respect I acknowledge the help provided by both of the Gehlot

brothers, and others at our club. She has received coaching in Sweden, Austria, and Hungary and I was able to

accompany her and her mother to Amsterdam where she received coaching from Russian international Yana Timina.

Last season she represented England in Portugal, Sweden, Germany, and the Isle of Man and played in the

European Cadet Championships in Austria. Perhaps her major success was in winning the Cadet Masters event with a

100% record (another win over Tin Tin!).

Well how has this season started? Fantastic. In her first year as a Junior she entered the Senior Grand Prix held at

Guildford. On the Saturday she won the Band 3 event and the went one better by winning the Band 2 title. On Sunday

she raised her game to new heights by reaching the final of the Ladies Singles. She lost the last match of the day to

England No 3 Hannah Hicks by 3 games to 1. Her 19 consecutive wins at this event was quickly noticed by the England

selectors and she has been chosen to represent her country at junior level in the Hungarian Championships. Her rise up

the rankings has been sensational by any standards and she is now at No 18 on the Senior List. (I have challenged her to

get into the England top ten by the end of this season).

I am not sure yet whether she can emulate the extraordinary exploits of our previous star ladies, Alison Broe,

Karen Witt, and Mandy Sainsbury, but she is well on the way. More continental experience is essential to hone her

established skills. There are not too many players about who have the necessary charisma and natural crowd pleasing

ability of the born winner. Maria has these in abundance and she must now set her sights on reaching a top European

level of play. Supportive parents are essential for the aspiring young player and both mother and father have provided

100% commitment. Her school, Abbey, are not exactly noted for sporting excellence have nevertheless recognised that

Maria's table tennis is to be encouraged, and that has been extremely helpful.

I am mighty proud of what Maria has achieved so far but there are many more mountains to climb. She has every

chance of following Gemma Schwartz as a senior international player. We both recognise that without the Kingfisher

Club, and the marvellous facilities that they provide, then this story would probably have had no beginning. The plaudits

keep coming, from Reading, the ETTA, and the Abbey school and it is to her credit that she takes it all in her stride with

no trace of arrogance. Keep focused, Maria.

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Now this is something NOT to miss! I cannot give you

more details than Brian already has (please see below) but,

whenever you are having a

squint at your Radio Times

(or whatever), keep an eye

open for this programme! (Ed.)

By Brian Halliday (28th October 2012)

Reading's rising table tennis star, Maria Tsaptsinos, has been invited to

display her expertise in the BBC programme Friday Download, which is scheduled

for showing in November. She has already filmed part of the programme

alongside Chris Doran and Michael Ho, two of England's leading players.

More good news for Kingfisher's charismatic youngster is her selection to

represent England in the forthcoming Hungarian Junior Open Championships. Although her recent form has been

sensational, it is a surprise that Maria has leapfrogged some of her English rivals, bearing in mind that she is in her first

year as a junior.

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READING LEAGUE : DIVISION 1

KINGFISHER B (by Geoff Civil) Team: Richard Fifield,

Daniel Grover, Roger Woolven-

Allen, Geoff Civil (Capt.)

After having to postpone our first couple of matches we've only played four and things

have gone pretty much according to expectations. We were never going to get much joy from

Kingfisher A, Polish A and a particularly strong OLOP C, but there were a few highlights.

Richard and Roger both beat Ricks from OLOP, and Dan and Geoff had a good doubles win

against Graham Diplock and Richard Rosinski at Polish.

More recently they repeated the feat against Jason Roberts and Simon Berry at Sonning

Common & Peppard A. Also in this match Richard and Geoff both overcame Simon Berry and

Paul Jarvis resulting in a 5-5 draw and our first point in the table. In our next match I have high

expectations when Richard, Roger and Dan take on Sonning Common & Peppard C in our first re-

arranged fixture. (Update: Recent events were not so good! So much for Geoff’s high

expectations!!! Oo-er missus… Ed.)

READING LEAGUE : DIVISION 2 : KINGFISHER D (by Ivor Hardman) Team: Trevor Organ, Colin Dyke, Sharon Mitchell, Ivor Hardman (Capt.)

What a good start to the season winning the first 4 matches, 8-2,7-3,7-3 and 6-4!

But then came our first loss to Tidmarsh A 1-9.

Colin Dyke is playing very well having won 9/15 (60%); Trevor Organ is playing

slightly off form with 6/12 (50%); Sharon Mitchell is making a slow start with 1/6 (16%)

while Ivor Hardman has 10/12 (83%). Will it last?

We are currently in second place, just one point behind Tidmarsh A. With a lot of

matches to go, I feel that we will have no problem in staying in Division 2, and if our form

continues then we could challenge for promotion.

As for the doubles, after a shaky start it seems that Colin and I have become a good

pairing winning 2/3. Trevor and I, though, are unbeaten 1/1.

A good, all-round performance! Keep up the good work, team!

(Note: Ivor ended his report with the following comment: “There you go. It’s all

rubbish really but I know you will print it.” I responded by telling Ivor that, yes, I shall

certainly print it but, no, it’s certainly not rubbish. If only ALL our Team Captains would follow Ivor’s example… Sigh…

Ed.) - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

READING LEAGUE : DIVISION 2 : KINGFISHER E (by Allan Bruton) Team: Peter Bennett, Phil Mead, John Morris, Dave Gostelow, Allan Bruton (Capt.)

Satisfactory start to the season, it is early days yet to start panicking, currently mid table won 2

lost 2 in 5th position.

I shall be away towards the latter part of the season for a month and if previous form has anything to

do with it the team will put on a spurt during this period and be hard pushed to avoid promotion.

We shall see!! Watch this space. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

READING LEAGUE : DIVISION 3 : KINGFISHER G (by Allen Pack) Team: Dave Duncan, Rogerio Albelo, Carol Byers, Eric Holmes, Allen Pack (Capt.)

They say consistency is what we need to aim for in table tennis and for our first four

matches we have been nothing but consistent. Unfortunately the score has been 6 - 4 against us

for each of the four matches. Very frustrating to come close to points but walking away empty

handed. However I don't see this trend continuing as our team gets better and better with each

match and the proof of this is a fantastic 6 - 4 win for us over Sonning Common on 15th

October. We now have points at last but, in all the excitement I forgot to email the results to

Nick Lean. Thanks to Nick for his prompt today; this has now been corrected.

One thing to note when looking for Reading League results is that the website is in the

process of moving to Table Tennis 365 platform. The home page for Reading is now

http://www.tabletennis365.com/reading and the league position for Division 3 is available at

this link http://www.tabletennis365.com/reading/league/Senior_2012-13/Division_3. Finally,

a “get well soon” mention is needed for our star player Dave Duncan; kneeling down in front

of all those chimneys has finally caught up with him and a bit of R&R is needed to get things

back in order.

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BRACKNELL LEAGUE : KINGFISHER A

(by John Willcocks) Team: John Morris,

Geoff Civil, Phil Mead, Roger

Woolven-Allen, John Willcocks (Capt.)

We have had a solid start to the season with three wins and two draws which were against

our B and C teams and we are currently in second place in the league with 35 points . Phil and I

have both started the season well and Geoff, John and Roger look to be running into good form;

despite fielding various different combinations we have also won all of our doubles.

As in previous seasons the team to beat will be OLOP A and with their strong squad it

will be a surprise if they do not win the league. The league looks to be generally much more

competitive than in recent seasons so we are likely to have a much harder fight than we have had

in the last two years to at least finish runners up, with one or more of the other Kingfisher teams

pushing us hard.

BRACKNELL LEAGUE : KINGFISHER C (by Allan Bruton) Team: Jeff Huggins, Ivor Hardman, Graham Outrim, Allan Bruton (Capt.)

We have been hit by some holiday nightmares since the fixture list and rota were provided

which could have been a problem, but we have been lucky that Graham Outrim, our reserve, has been

able to step in which has helped tremendously. With his input we have managed to take valuable points

off of our A & B teams which has elevated us to third currently with a game in hand on our closest rivals.

I do however still expect a mid-table finish.

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BRACKNELL LEAGUE : KINGFISHER D (by Allen Pack) Team: Trevor Organ, Michael Houghton, Ashish Bahuguna, Allen Pack

(Capt.)

Four matches played now and I have to say I am well pleased with team

performance and results. Of the four Kingfisher teams we do currently trail teams A, B

and C but with a game in hand against team B we could well be causing an upset here.

Our first two matches were up against top teams at OLOP and Kingfisher and,

in both, we came away with three games. Not sure if Geoff Civil had a tiring day on the

golf course but each of our players scored wins over him, sorry Geoff. Against OLOP

A, both Ashish and Michael took a game off Bradley King; good going but we all failed

to make any impression against Neil Bird.

Our first win was against OLOP C, 7 - 3 result; could have been more with

Michael and Allen just losing out in the fifth match. Our last match against Kingfisher

B was 6- 4 against us but we certainly gave them a run for their money. Colin was 2-1

down against Ashish but fought back strongly to take the last two games 11- 8. Michael

also took Colin to five games.

I've also learnt that playing with / against choppers you need to start your match at 1930 prompt or else you could

still be playing at the club at midnight!

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The following article has been extracted from The

Week magazine, dated 13th October 2012:

“Pinkie” Barnes, who has died aged 97, brought

glamour to

English

women’s table tennis in the post-war years, said The Times. Indeed, Barnes

herself believed there was a link between her looks and her skill, once

declaring that “the better I look, the better I play”. Her record seems to bear

this out. Always immaculately presented, and renowned for her “venomous”

forehand smash, she represented her country eleven times and, together with

the great Hungarian player Gizi Farkas, took the women’s doubles title at the

English Open in 1947. The partnership didn’t last: shortly afterwards, Farkas

was convicted of shoplifting in Selfridges, and deported.

Lavender Rosamund Marguerite Barnes was born in Luton, the

daughter of an alcoholic journalist. As a child she hated the name Lavender,

since it led to her becoming called “Lavvy”. Instead, she adopted the

nickname “Pinkie”. As a young woman she had various careers, including

singing with her sister in an act called Sweet and Sing, and working as

assistant to the first newspaper astrologer, RH Naylor of the Sunday Express.

Always handy with a table tennis bat, Barnes performed exhibition matches in

fire stations during the war. Raven-haired herself, she was dubbed “Black

Beauty”, while her partner, Peggy Franks, was known as the “Blonde

Bombshell”. She gave up the sport after her marriage in 1952 to character

actor Sam Kydd.

However, it wasn’t in Barnes’s interest to relax, said the Daily

Telegraph. She got a job with the ad agency Masius and Ferguson, becoming

one of the first female copywriters in the business. Working on the Veet hair

removal cream account, she won an award for her slogan: “Veet – it’s always summer under your arms.” After retiring,

Barnes devoted her energies to her husband’s career and to entertaining his showbiz friends, including Eric Sykes and

Dirk Bogarde, at their home in Shepherd’s Bush

Please be reminded that, if

you would like to sell, buy, swap

or donate something through these

pages, do not hesitate to contact

me. My address, as I’m sure you

have worked out, is roger.woolven-allen@virginmedia.com.

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Very attractive enamelled

Kingfisher lapel or pin badges,

suitable for sports bags, bat cases

or, as the name suggests, for the

lapels of your track suits. Let everyone know which club you are proud to play for! £2 each. Please

contact Colin Dyke on 0118 978 3770 or via email at colindyke@waitrose.com.

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This is an amendment to the information in the last newsletter,

mainly regarding ordering procedure.

We are delighted to have negotiated a

deal with Tees Sport to supply members with

a Club Shirt which should be available for

quite a period of time. It is available in four colours and it would look good if your team all

turned out in a Club Shirt of your chosen colour. The shirt will be the Tees 2 Shirt and

comes in colours black, red, navy or light blue, each with different colour features. It is

made from 100% Micro Dry fit Polyester which

allows air circulation and absorbs perspiration. It will

have the Kingfisher name on the back plus Butterfly

and Tees Sport logos. We have negotiated a price of

£21.25 each which is well below catalogue prices and

includes all lettering, logos and postage. If you want to personalise them with your own

name or team name on the back it would cost 25p per letter extra. The new Tees 2 shirt can be found on the Tees

Sport Website – there is no catalogue available for the current season as yet.

The shirts must be ordered direct by you from Tees Sport by post on the forms available in the Clubhouse.

Alternatively Colin Dyke or Brian Halliday can email you a form by request or you can download one from our own

website. Any queries on these shirts can be referred to Colin or Brian.

Tees Sport Website: www.teessport.com

Kingfisher Website: www.tabletennis365.com/Kingfisher

Brian Halliday: 0118 9722421. Colin Dyke: 0118 9783770

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Is anyone interested in a computer scanner

and/or an office chair? Both items are surplus to

requirements.

The Dell A920 scanner is in full working

order (except that I’ve mislaid the data lead – I’m

still looking for it!) and comes with a power lead. It was made in the USA rather than in China,

so that gives you an indication as to its age!

The office or computer chair is one of those swivelling things and is in excellent

condition. I am getting rid of it because my lad Roo bought me a brand new state-of-the-art

jobbie for my birthday, costing him many shekels.

Both items are free of charge to anyone who would like them. First come; first served.

All I ask is that the receivers give me their word that the goodies will not immediately be sold

on eBay! If there are no takers, both items will be lobbed off in the direction of the Sue Ryder

home.

Please contact Roger on roger@virginmedia.com, or on 0118 947 8833 / 07771668881.

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FOR SALE: WEDDING DRESS. Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

According to a recently-conducted survey, six out of seven dwarves are not happy.

Although I am not quite sure what to make of

the following email received from Michael

Horton/Howton/Hufton, it was good to hear from him.

“Hi. You know you really love me. Write something

about me. Yeah! Thanks, Michael.”

Apart from saying that you’re full of fun, young feller, and that your table tennis is improving all the time, I’m not

too sure what to write about you! Perhaps you could send something a little more lengthy for the next issue? Always

hopeful. (Ed.)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Hi Roger,

As I don't have any

team report, I have little to

mention.

However I was

wondering if you could mention my participation in Movember, a worldwide charity event

highlighting male health issues, where I will grow a moustache for a whole month between 1st and

30th November.

This is my online page in case people want to donate: http://mobro.co/ericvanlooy

By the way, I will update my online Movember page with daily pictures of the progress I

am making with my upper lip growth.

Thanks in advance! Regards, Eric. (Eric looks better and better all the time! Ed.)

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I have received the

following email from dear old

Jonathan Samuel, or The

Looney as he was

affectionately known. It is a

great shame that Jon has given up our sport, because he was definitely one of the more colourful of our players – and he

was pretty darned good, too!

Roger, I understand you want a full report on how I am getting on. I

can't produce a full report, as it may be a little tedious for some, but here are a

few key facts about how I am getting on

Not missing the game of ping-pong at all. The bigger ball, the change in

scoring, the change in the rubber rules, the change in the service rules; the game I

gave up is not the game I started playing all those years ago.

My poor attempt to learn the Russian language is going very slowly, the

grammar is proving a nightmare that I can't yet come to terms with. But what

little I do know came in very handy in Russia this year. I think seeing the victory

parade in Red Square was one of the most wonderful sights I have ever come

across. And a visit to the Kublinka tank museum is a must. They have all the main tanks ever used during WW2,

including what I think may be the only Maus I have ever seen. I also saw a Tiger 1 start up, quite a sound.

Yes, I don't miss the game at all, but I do miss some of the people involved, and that even includes yourself!!

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I know that Sylvia

Bruton has kindly forwarded

entry forms to all Kingfisher

members, so this note is really

just a polite reminder.

The Reading Closed Championships are scheduled to be held at the Kingfisher Club over the weekends of 9th/10

th

February 2013 (Seniors and Veterans) and 23rd

/24th February 2013 (Juniors). The closing date for entries is Friday 25

th

January 2013.

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Hi Roger. Your last newsletter (Issue 66)

refers. I must commend you on being the very first

editor ever to produce a Kingfisher News without

the word "Gehlot" in it. Super stuff!!

Unless, like me, you have no real wish to be reminded of your table

tennis performances, please don’t forget that this “365” stuff is pretty good.

Both the Reading and Bracknell Leagues use it (or something very similar) and

the results are available right down to the individual game scores.

Unfortunately, of course, the outcome of this is that your soul is bared.

There is no chance of telling your pals that Martin Adams beat you 15-13 in the

fifth when anyone can easily find out that you did, in fact, lose 1-11 4-11 2-11.

But, such minor irrelevancies apart, keep stoking up these websites. They are very impressive indeed! - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

As with the past two occasions, this quiz is comprised of six pictures for you to identify

and four other table tennis-related questions. Here, then, is Quiz Number 3. The answers appear

at the very end of the newsletter. As before, if you achieve “ten-out-of-ten” you are table tennis’s

answer to Mastermind. Anything between nine and six is very good indeed; five to three makes

you about average and, below that, have you thought about trying some Ginkgo Biloba or some

mint tea? The correct answers appear at the very end of this newsletter.

Q: Twisted beer party led by a locally well-known senior ETTA official (5,7).

Q: What does “entshuldigung” mean? (See Page 12)

Q: What is a table tennis ball (currently!!) made of?

Q: Other than the Chinese, this German was the best-performing 2012 Olympic table tennis player. He took the Men’s

Singles bronze medal. Please name him - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I wondered why the table tennis ball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

She was only a whisky-maker, but he loved her still.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Membership Secretary Eric kindly forwarded the following email from a

prospective member. It must be the most unusual – and certainly the most humorous –

enquiry that we have ever received. I don’t know whether or not Bill Ingram has become a

member yet but, if he has, I really look forward to meeting him! (Ed.)

Hi Eric: I picked up a flyer in Decathlon....I have been half-heartedly searching for a club for years – the flyer

did the trick!!!

But some questions or statements…

(1) I believe I am very, very good (I no doubt am not very, very good – ha-ha!!) Just because I have an

unbeaten stretch going back to age 16, own three tables and no doubt have my own rules – and my opposition goes from

the “which way do I hold this bat?” to my horrendously competitive Sales Director..... I am in cloud cuckoo land.

(2) So with now that less-than-convincing introduction, what evening do you let people like me turn up for a

whack to see whether you want me anywhere near your club please?

I can bring a sense of humour, killer forehand (in my opinion) and my own carbon-loaded bat bought some years

ago (but I refuse to play with anything else, it evens travels abroad with me!! How sad) by my wonderful wife.

Let me know. Kindly, Bill. (Bill Ingram)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Well, that’s all folks! I hope you enjoyed it. The next issue should see,

among many other things, a wedding report (can you guess whose?) and another

profile (can you guess whose?).

I hope you are enjoying the current season and are having a lot more success

than I am! But I still love it, really love it… All the very best to you all. Roger.Roger.Roger.Roger. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The Kingfisher Table Tennis Club was inaugurated on 19th

March 1987 and opened on 8th January 1988.

It is an accredited FOUR-STAR PREMIER CLUB bringing

great benefits to the Club and its members. The Club also has SPORT ENGLAND

CLUBMARK status. More information can be obtained from Sylvia Bruton on 0118

901 9119.

The Club aims to cater for all standards of play but actively encourages and

trains younger players and has good links with The Bulmershe School in whose

grounds the clubhouse is situated. Any information regarding coaching at the Club can

be obtained from Nick Heaps on 0118 901 7819.

The Club enters teams in the local Berkshire leagues as well as the National leagues. League play starts in

September each year and tends to finish some time in April.

There are many internal events as well, including the Club Championships, the Grand Prix evenings, a pre-season

Grouping Tournament and the very popular Thursday evening Club nights.

For members old enough (or lucky enough!) to have some free time on midweek mornings, The Tuesday Club and

The Friday Club offer some great practice opportunities. The Friday Club tends to consist of players of a slightly higher

standard, but there are no rules. Apart from participants having to be Kingfisher members, that is! Both Clubs start their

sessions at 1000, unless rare school bookings call for minor ad hoc amendments.

Any membership queries should be directed to Eric van Looy on 01628 621322, while other queries should be

addressed to the Chairman, Colin Dyke, on 0118 978 3770.

And, of course, until they throw me out, please feel free to send your Kingfisher News stuff to me! My email

address, in case you are unsure, is roger.woolven-allen@virginmedia.com and my telling-bone numbers are 0118 947

8833 and 07771668881.

Colin, I believe, still has one or two Kingfisher pin badges in his possession. At £2 a throw, these are a real snip!

CLUB OFFICERS and COMMITTEE:

President Peter Charters. Chairman Colin Dyke. Hon Treasurer Colin Dyke. Hon Gen Sec Peter Charters. Coaching

Officer Nick Heaps. Membership Secretary Eric van Looy. Club Welfare Officer Eric van Looy. Committee Members

Andy Yon, Allen Pack and Peter Bradley.

Finally, remember the web! Kingfisher’s website is in the hands of some real experts (mainly Allen Pack and

Nick Heaps) and is always worth having a squint at. The address is www.kingfisherttc.co.uk but, if you bung “kingfisher

ttc” into any search engine, you are bound to find what you are looking for. Enjoy!

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QUIZ ANSWERS: 1) Denis Neale. 2) Roger Hookey. 3) Mike Dorrington. 4) Eric van Looy. 5) Fred Perry. 6)

Bob Davis. 7) Peter Bradley. 8) Sorry (in German). 9) Celluloid. 10) Dimitrij Ovtcharov.