Effective Listening Chhavi Jain

Listening

The art of hearing and understanding what someone is saying.

Listening

The process of listening is two-fold:

•Decoding

• Giving an internal response to perceived message.

Listening

Essentials for effective listening-

• Positive attitude

• Ability to concentrate

• Enter into Question Answer sessions

• Conducive body posture

Listening

Deterrents to the listening process:

• Ego

• Hone listening skills

• Involvement with the self/ preoccupation

• Past, present and future

• Fear

• The familiarity trap

• Stress

Listening

Process of listeningThe sensing/ selecting stage

The evaluating stage

The responding stage

The memory stage

Listening - Advantages

• It breaks up the barriers between people.

• Understanding increases.

• Loss of potential revenue minimized.

• Prevents miscommunication of objectives and priorities among people.

Listening - Advantages

We listen to:

•Obtain information

• Solve problems

• Share experiences

• Persuade or dissuade

Listening – Advantages for leaders and teams

• Helps know the organisation

• Helps in making better policies

• Mollifies complaining employees

• Important for the success of the open-door policy

• Helps to spot sensitive areas before they become explosive.

• Forms a bond of respect

• Increases productivity

• Can calm people down

• Increases confidence

• Increases accuracy

“WE ARE GIVEN TWO EARS, BUT ONLY ONE MOUTH.THIS IS BECAUSE GOD KNEW THAT LISTENING WAS TWICE AS HARD AS TALKING.”

Poor Listening Habits

• Listening but not hearing

• Rehearsing

• Interrupting

• Hearing what is expected

• Feeling defensive

• Listening for a point of disagreement

• Call the subject matter un-interesting

• Criticize the delivery or appearance of the speaker

Listening

Informative

Attentive

Relationship

Appreciative

Critical

Discriminative

Informative Listening

Listener’s primary concern

•Is to understand the message

Informative Listening

• Listener successful as the meaning they assign is as close as possible to the meaning that the sender intended.

• Eg. We listen to Lectures or instructions from

teachers and what we learn depends on how well we listen.

In the workplace we listen to understand new practices/ procedures and how well we perform depends on how well we listen.

Informative ListeningInformative Listening

Vocabulary

ConcentrationMemory

•Discipline•Motivation•Acceptance of Responsibility

Attentive Listening

Goal

•Is to understand and remember what they are hearing

Attentive Listening

•Attentive listeners have relational goals like giving a positive impression, advancing the relationship, demonstrating care.

Attentive Listening- skill cluster

Attentive Listening

Attention Skills

Following SkillsReflecting

Skills

Attention skills

Posture of involvementAppropriate

body motion

Eye Contact

Non- distractive

environment

Following Skills

Door openers

Minimal encouragers

Infrequent questions

Attentive silence

Reflecting skills

Paraphrasing

Reflecting feelings

Reflecting meaningsSummative reflection

Relationship Listening

Purpose

• Either to help an individual • Or to improve the relationships

between people.• Emphasis is on understanding the

other person.

Therapeutic Listening

• Special type of relationship listening which brings to mind situations where counsellors, medical personnel, or other professionals allow a troubled person to talk through a problem.

Relationship listening- attitude for effectiveness

Attending – non verbal cues are crucial

Supporting –3 characteristics describe supportive listener-

discretion, belief, patience

Empathizing- to see as the other sees, hear as

the other hears and feel as the other feels.

Empathic Behaviour

Have the desire to be an empathic listener.

Learn as much as you can about the other person.

Accept the other person- even if you cannot accept some aspects of that person’s behaviour.

Appreciative Listening

Listen to music for enjoyment

To speakers because you like their style

Listen to your choices in theatre, TV, radio or film

Appreciative Listening

Presentation

Perception Previous

experience

Medium, setting, style, personality,

perception

Noise of city traffic, rails, etc.

Perception builds attitude

Critical Listening

PoliticiansMediaSalesmenAdvocates of policies and proceduresOur own financial, emotional, intellectual, physical and spiritual needs require us to place a premium on critical listening and the thinking that accompanies it.

Critical Listening- Elements by Aristotle

•Ethos Source credibility

•Logos Logical argument

•Pathos Psychological appeal

Expertness ,

trustworthiness

True propositions

and valid inferences

Fear, guilt, loyalty,

sympathy

Discriminative Listening

• By being sensitive to the changes in the speaker’s rate, volume, force, pitch, emphasis, etc. the informative listener can detect even the slightest shift in nuances.

Hearing abilityAwareness of

sound structureIntegration of non-

verbal cues

Discriminative Listening

Hearing is involuntary

Listening involves the reception and interpretation of what is heard.

An active listener:•Does not finishes, others sentences

•Does not answer questions with questions

•Is aware of and guards against biases

•Is never a day dreamer

•Never becomes pre-occupied with his/ her own thoughts when others talk

•Does not dominate the conversation

•Plans responses after the other person has finished speaking, not before that

•Provides feedback, but does not interrupt incessantly

•Analyzes by looking at the relevant factors and asking open – ended questions

•Keeps the conversation on what the speaker says, not on what interests him/ her

•Takes brief notes

Styles of Poor ListeningFAKER- only pretend to be listening

DEPENDENT – may agree excessively with the speaker not only because they really agree, but because they really want to maintain goodwill of the speaker.

INTERRUPTER- never allow others to finish talking, feel necessary to respond to a point as soon as it is made, more concerned with their own thoughts and feelings than with those of others.

SELF- CONSCIOUS LISTENER- tries to impress others, do not listen with understanding, constantly frame replies in order to be helpful.

INTELLECTUAL LISTENER- attend only to the words of the other, ignore non- verbal cues.

JUDGE AND JURY LISTENER- often become so involved in judging of ideas / behaviour of others that they do not hear the full story.

3 Levels of Listening• Level 1

• Level 2

• Level 3

Level 1• Conscious attention,

understanding, awareness of moment, respect and spirit of co-operation.

Level 1• Managers will see things from

the other person’s point of view, empathetic to person’s feelings.

Level 1 •Avoids internal distractions that interfere with effective listening

Level 1• Managers’ attitude of mutual

respect, helds suspend negative personal labels and is non-intimidating.

Level 2

• State of partial awareness• Listening to words but not fully

understanding the meaning of the message.

Level 2• Managers at this level do not

realize that information is being missed.

Level 2• Results in making little effort to

understand the talker’s intent or to clarify for understanding.

Level 2• Focus is on the words, non-verbal

communication is missed.

Level 3

Dangerous consequences in this level.Automatic turned-out mode.Internal distractions include day dreaming, thinking about something else, fault finding, negative feelings, etc.Blaming attitude that perpetuates negative feelings of frustration, anger, worry, impatience, etc.

Manager experiences concentration problems resulting in difficulty while making decisions.

Causes stress, which then reduces alertness and creativity

Strategies for effective listening• Decide what your goals are for the conversation

• To exchange information• To build working relationships• To feel good• To make someone else feel good

• Be aware of your options

• When to speak and when to listen

• Planning what to SAY when you SPEAK- Focusing and Clarifying

• Attentive Listening

Payoffs of effective listening

• Gaining knowledge

• Receiving better work and co-operation from others

• Wining friends

• Solving problems and conflicts

• Reducing tension

• Preventing trouble

• Doing a better job

Passive

listening occur

s when

a listen

er does not

verbally

respond to the

speaker.

Active listening involves verbal

feedback.

Six Styles of LeadershipLeader-

ship StyleCommunication Style

Visionary Listens to the values held by the individuals within the group.

Coaching Listens one-to-one to employees, establishes personal rapport and trust.

Affiliative Listens to discover employees’ emotional needs and strives to honour and accommodate those needs in the workplace.

Democratic Obtains input and commitment s from every one in the group.

Pacesetting (MBO)

Leader sets ambitious goals and continuously monitors progress towards those goals.

Commanding Issues instructions without asking for input . Do it bcoz I say so. No listening is required.

• Insert scanned page 105 from Raman Singh