season-1-weeks-1-18-master-workbook.pdf - 2 words

2Words Character Development CurriculumCopyright © 2019 by The Mackey Leadership Group

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HIGHER STANDARDA standard is defined as “a level of quality or attainment.” It’s a measure of accountability that directly impacts the your impact in sports and in the game of life.

When you have low standards, you will low success. However, the opposite is also true. As the level of your standards increase, so increases your success. That because with higher standards, comes a higher level of accountability, training, commitment, grit, and focus on goal achievement. Your success in the game of life is directly related to the standards you hold yourself to.

MOST VALUABLEWho is the most valuable person in your life? You might say your mom, your grandfather, or maybe even your girlfriend or boyfriend. Sure, there’s always an easy answer to that question, but the easy answer may not always be the most accurate. If we zoomed out of your life and looked at the person you value the most, do the most for, and focus on the most, you’d most likely be looking in the mirror.If you want to find success in the game of life, then you must learn to treat every person you meet, from the custodian to the coach that’s recruiting you, the same. Treat every person you meet like they are the most valuable person you’ve ever met.

SACRIFICE REQUIREDThere are a lot of things, when it comes to finding success in the game of life, that are optional. Whatever you might find on that exhaustive list, the one thing you will not find is sacrifice.Sacrifice is required for reaching your goals as an individual and as a team.

As challenging as this concept is, it is worth every painful moment. When you learn how to use sacrifice to your advantage, you unlock a door to success that few people are ever willing to walk through. The reality of sports and of the game of life, however, is that if you don’t sacrifice for you goals, then you will sacrifice your goals. Either way, sacrifice is required.

R FACTORYou can’t control the events in your life-- most of the things that happen to you in life will be beyond your control. Events you don’t plan for and outcomes beyond your control are the norm, and out of your hands. But there is one thing you can always control, and that is your response to a given situation. You can always control your response.

We call that the R-Factor, and if you want success in the game of life, it might be the most important thing that you have to master in all your life.

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KNOCK KNOCKWe’ve all heard the saying, “When opportunity knocks, you better open the door.” That phrase claims if you’re not in the right place at the right time, you’ll miss your shot.

Let’s get one thing straight: opportunity it not a unicorn. It’s not rare, and it’s definitely not a once in a lifetime chance. Opportunity is everywhere. The question is not, when will opportunity knock? The real question is, what doors am I building for opportunity to knock on?

WHAT IF?Every great idea the world has ever known began with the question, “What if?” From Thomas Edison to Dr. King, Kenny Sailors to Mark Zuckerburg, BIG ideas begin with a with small question.

Sadly, so many people refuse to “risk the if” and settle for the “is.” What is acceptable? What is easy? What is the path of least resistance?

But, for those who are willing to risk failure, there is a world of unfathomable possibility-- not only in for your life, but through your life. IF you can ask the right question.

BECOME PERFECTThere are two types of mindsets people operate from: a fixed-mindset and a growth-mindset. But there is only one mindset that leads to success: the growth mindset. That’s because the growth mindset isn’t focused on where you’ve been or what you have, it’s focused on where you’re going. It’s focused not on what you have in this moment, but instead on what you’re going to gain in every moment between now and then.

“Become perfect” is a growth mindset. “Become perfect” says “I may not be there today, but I’m going to get there soon.”

NO EXCUSES “No excuses” might be the most cliche, over-used, and repeated phrase in all of sports. It has been shouted, drilled, and repeated in every locker room from the big apple to the pineapple, plastered on walls, and printed on t-shirts.Yet, as familiar, and self-explanatory as this phrase is, few people (especially high-school students) every actually put it into practice. In fact, most student athletes do the exact opposite: they give excuses after tired excuse.The reality is, however, that excuses have NEVER ONCE lead to success. Ever. So, if we want to be the kind of men and women that find success, despite our circumstances, we must learn to do more than talk about “No excuses.”

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FIVE P’sWhen is the game really won? Is it when you run up the scoreboard? When the clock ticks out to zero? When you stride a few inches longer than your opponent?While all those are technically true, they don’t tell the whole story.You will only spend 8 percent of your time competing. You spend 92 percent of your time practicing, watching film, working on the fundamentals and lifting in the weight room.

EIGHTEEN INCHESWe can HEAR all of the right things that we ever need to hear in life--all of the love and encouragement, that we are valued or that we have potential, inspi-rational talks, great speeches, or be given hope and encouragement, the right game plan, or the right play call. We can HEAR everything right, but until what we HEAR, travels the 18 inches from our “hear to our heart”, and becomes something we DO, nothing will ever come from it.We can hear about being successful, and we can think about being successful, but until we actually do what is right we will not be successful-- not in sports and not in the game of life.

ONE THINGYour future success is dependent upon you doing the right work, right now. Not just hard work, but the right work. And not just the right work; not just hard work tomorrow, or yesterday, but right now. Success is found when you do the right work, right now.That’s why it is so important to find the one thing that you’ve got today to make you successful tomorrow. When you hyper-focus on the one thing you need to do today, everyday, and then you do it again and again for the rest of your life, you find success like you’ve never imagined.

PURPOSED PAIN Have you ever wondered the difference between those people who are rushed by adversity and those who are catapulted by it? What makes some people fall apart when pain and adversity comes their way, while other people seem to be made stronger by it?Zig Ziglar said, “Tough times don’t last; tough people do.”Perhaps the single greatest characteristic of a “tough person” is there ability to transform their pain into “purposed pain.” When a person, 18 or 80, can point their pain in a positive direction they forge a strength that will allow them to be overcome any obstacle, achieve any goal, and become more than they ever imagined.

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OWN IT“The best players learn from their mistakes...That’s what separates the leader on the court from the pack.” Pau Gasol

Nobody likes making mistakes. They’re embarrassing. They’re uncomfortable. They make you confront the fact that you are not perfect.

When we let go of the fear and negative power of making mistakes, there’s no limit to what we can do.

OVERNIGHT SUCCESSWe’ve all had daydreams of being “discovered” out of the blue for our awesome talents.

It looks like it happens all the time: a YouTuber’s video goes viral or a hot new musician pops up from nowhere. Outside looking in, success just happened like they wished on a lucky penny and *poof* there it was.

But, internet celebrities, musicians, and pro athletes have given us a skewed view of what it means to be successful. So often, those big careers make it seem like success just happens overnight. One day, he’s joe schmoe, and the next, he’s world famous.

WHY NOT?We need to ask ourselves this question. Why not give my very best to every single thing that I do?When we give our best effort, we’ll have no regrets, regardless the outcome. That’s because giving our best means taking control of our situation to the greatest extent possible. It’s true that if we show up to practice and we put in the work, and then we show up on the field and give 100%, we might still lose the game. But, there’s no shame in a loss like that.Are we giving our best at everything we do, everyday? The natural impulse is to automatically say yes. But can we say that and keep our integrity intact? Have we really given our all every minute of every day?

FOCUS FORWARD Forward is not just a direction. It’s a mindset.

Having the focus and tenacity to keep moving forward no matter what distractions come your way is a powerful tool.

The greatest predictor of success is not intelligence, physical strength, natural aptitude, or even a combination of these things. Instead, the greatest factor in whether or not a person can accomplish their goals is one thing: Grit.

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CLARK KENT“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation. Because your character is what you really are.” John WoodenSuperheroes often wear disguises to hide their identities from the world. One of the most famous examples is Superman’s disguise as Clark Kent, but we can all think of plenty of others.In a similar way, we wear disguises everyday based on where we are or who we’re with. These disguises are natural, but they’re also a defense mechanism. We wear them because we’re afraid that if we show people who we really are, we might be rejected or ridiculed.

GUARANTEED STRUGGLE“Struggle is guaranteed; success is optional.” Coach Mackey

Struggle shows up in every area of our life at some point. Struggle can be having a hard time learning a new subject or having to push yourself to the edge of exhaustion to finish that mile run or having to deal with a rough home life.

But if you didn’t struggle, how would you ever learn? And if you didn’t learn, how would you ever improve?

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2 W o r d s C h a r a c t e r D e v e l o p m e n t • S e a s o n 1 • W e e k 1

HIGHER STANdARDS01W E E K

CCOACHES CAPTAINS ATHLETES

Establish whatyour team

standards are, why these exist, and how you will measure them.

Build a circlearound you of

supportive people who will keep you

accountable to your standards and push you towards your

best self.

Define what youstand for and who will support you in your pursuit of those standards.

PARENTS

Encourage yourchildren to pursue higher standards and show them

that we love them regardless of the

outcome.

HIGHER STANDARDS“If you don’t like what you’re getting out of your life, then change what you’re putting in. Nobody is in charge of what goes into your life but you, which means nobody is in charge of what comes out of your life but you. You are the boss.” -Coach Mackey

Are there parts of your life you want to change? Guess what? You and you alone have the power to change your life. That’s right. You hold the power to change your life and increase your level of success.

The first step is raising your standards. In other words, if you want to change your life, you must become more selective on what you allow and don’t allow into your life.

When you raise your standards, you raise the bar you hold yourself to. That tells your mind, body, and soul that you are worthy of that level of success and worthy of the life you hope to live. Rais-ing your standards revokes all power away from the things that hold you back, and puts the pow-er back in your hands because you chose to rise above.

This isn’t just some mind game. Once you set your bar higher, you’ll begin to seek out the things that meet your standards. You’re looking towards the things that lift you up and propel you for-ward.

By doing this, you begin to change the way you think of yourself, and as you think, so you act.

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HIGHER STANDARDS: FOR COACHESWhy do we push our athletes to strive for greatness? Because we see their potential. We know what they are capable of, and a huge element of coaching is to give them a vision of their potential. Every person is worthy of their fullest potential, let’s help our team get there.

The unhealthy distractions and negative influences in high school are dense. As coaches, we need to reach through and give our athletes a higher perspective on life through setting higher standards that will not allow them to settle for what is, but rather strive for what could be.

This week, we are establishing team standards, why they exist, and how you will measure them.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. An acronym or phrase that articulates what it means to be a part of your athletic program [the what]: Create an easy to remember acronym or phrase that lays out the standards you hold your team to. Ex: “PANTHERS: positive, action-oriented,

trustworthy, honest, excellent, reliable, and success-driven.”

2. Opportunities to talk to the team (especially team leaders) about why your team standards exist and why they should matter [the why]:Many people speak about what their standards are, but until you understand why standards are just an abstract list of rules and expectations. Paint the picture of hope how higher standards are beneficial now and will create success later.(a) Why raise the bar? Why hold yourself to higher standards if no one else around you does?

3. A way to measure character wins [the how]:What gets measured gets changed. Similar to tracking the number of completed passes, PR times, or 3-point shots, find a way to publicly measure (across the team) how and when your athletes are gaining traction with living up to team standards.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“The quality of a leader is reflected in the standards they set for themselves.” -Ray Kroc

TUESDAY:“If you don’t like what you’re getting out of your life, then change what you’re putting into your life.” -Coach Mackey

WEDNESDAY:“Character is the sum total of all our everyday choices. It is putting right values into action every day. It is consistency of values, ideals, thoughts, words, and actions.” -John Maxwell

THURSDAY:“The day that your life will change forever is the day that you change what you demand for yourself.” - Coach Mackey

FRIDAY:“You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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HIGHER STANDARDS: FOR CAPTAINSWhen it comes to maintaining high standards, you need a support system. There will be a lot of distractions trying to grab your attention, and without good accountability, it can be easy to sacrifice your standards.

This support system involves three types of people: mentor, mentee, and peer. These people surround you from three different angles and all point you forward towards your standards, goals, and dreams.

Mentor: Who do you look up to and respect? Whose advice do you value? Who keeps youaccountable to your standards? Who will call you out if you start to slip under them? This is the type of person you want mentoring you. It’s typically someone older than you that has walked through your season of life and can share their wisdom with you.

Mentee: They say there are few betterways to hold yourself accountable than to have someone that looks up to you. When someone looks up to you, you have to think about how your words, actions, and standard levels influence them. It’s no longer all about you; it’s about making a positive impact on someone else’s life. If you are a captain, you automatically have people looking toward you for leadership and guidance.

Peer: Who gets you excited about thefuture? Who leaves you feeling motivated and wanting to work? Who inspires you to hit the books and succeed in life? Create a circle of influential peers to support you in your pursuit of living a high standard life. Surround yourself with people who have big goals and are willing to do the work to achieve them.

C

/// CAPTAINS’ LOG ///“LEADERS ALWAYS LEAD”

Do you have a mentor you talk to on a regular basis? If yes, what about them do

you admire? If no, who are 2-3 people who inspire you and whom you respect? Choose a day to reach out to each of them and ask them if they could mentor you, or if they have a recommendation of someone who

could.List the five people you spend the most

time with. Next to their names, write two things you honestly believe about their

character. Are those the type of things you want to be known for or associated with?Hypothetically, if three younger classmen

shadowed you, a team captain, 24/7 for an entire week, what do you think they would

believe about leadership?What’s a time in your life where sacrificing

your standards didn’t lead to a good outcome. Looking back, how would you

have handled it differently?

What are the top five things you want to be known for? How do your daily actions help or hurt your growth towards those things?

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HIGHER STANDARDS: FOR ATHLETESThis week, we’re going to focus on two questions:What do you stand for? -and- What can you not stand?

If you stand for something, then relentlessly pursue it in all areas of your life.

If you can’t stand something, then have no shame giving it the stiff arm.

Surround yourself with people who also hold strong to their high standards. Remember this: you and your dreams are worth fighting for, worth protecting, and worth being a snob about what you do and don’t let into your life. Don’t let people bring down your standards out of peer pressure or comparison or judgement.

Everyone is going to hold themselves to different standards, so don’t worry about what anybody thinks of yours. If you believe your standards are healthy, inspiring, and challenging, then you have no one to answer to than yourself. You are the boss.

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” - Jim Rohn, Motivational Speaker

Who are the five people you spend the most time with?

What drives them? What are they motivated by? What do they care about?

Do those values line up with the type of person you want to be?

Who are five people in your life that support your dreams, challenge you to grow, and inspire you the most?

What characteristics of theirs do you respect and admire?

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HIGHER STANDARDS: FOR PARENTSIt’s important to clearly communicate this point to our children: as parents, we set high standards for our children because we love them, not because we expect perfection from them.

Setting high standards gives our children targets to aim for as we teach and encourage them along the way. We want the world for them, but we know we can’t expect it from them.

This week, we want to make it clear that their worth isn’t connected to their outcomes. most proud of the pursuit, the work, and the process of living by higher standards.

As Norman Vincent Peale once said, “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll still land among the stars.” When it comes to setting standards, “shooting for the moon” means fixing your eyes on the way you want to live on your best days.

Phrase your family standards in such a way that the focus is positive. Instead of saying, “The Johnson family never lies,” say, “The Johnson family is honest in every circumstance.”

When you set positive standards, everyone focus in on the excellence you strive for rather on the problem you’re trying to correct. Even if they don’t necessarily reach that mark, they are going to be headed in the right direction.

By establishing higher standards we are giving them targets, but they must understand that they are loved regardless of where they land.

/// BEST 5 ///THE BEST FIVE MINUTES OF THE WEEK

As a family, let each person decide on one family core value (or standard) and ask why they chose it. Use this as an opportunity to learn about what matters to your children and spouse the most.

Share a story when you were ridiculedor made fun of for committing to a higher standard, how you overcame that adversity, and how it paid off down the road.

Tell your children about the influential people in your life and the characteristics you admire about them. Ask them who they believe influences their lives the most.

Encourage your child to seek mentors. Maybe even recommend a teacher or friend you believe would be a positive influence in their life.

When your child doesn’t meet a family standard, ask them why they didn’t meet it. There are typically other underlying factors that lead to that decision. Use this as an opportunity to talk through all the elements at workand encourage them to work through those struggles Can you learn from that to be better prepared for similar struggles down the road?

HIGHER STANdARDS


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CCOACHES CAPTAINS ATHLETES PARENTS

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Inspire unity amongst the team around common

goals.

Seek ways to go out of your

way to help your teammates.

Celebrate your teammates’ successes.

Teach your child about the importance of helping others.

MOST VALUABLEWho is the most valuable person in your life? We might impulsively say our mom, grandfather, girlfriend or boyfriend. We all have an easy answer to that question, but the easy answer may not be the most accurate.

If we zoomed out of our lives and looked at the person we value the most, do the most for, and focus on the most, we’d most likely be looking in the mirror.

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valuable person you’ve ever met.

this by shifting our mindset to think more about others than we think about ourselves, encouraging



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F O R C O A C H E S

MOST VALUABLE: FOR COACHESAs coaches, if all we do is teach athletes how to put more points on the board, we have failed. We’re training our athletes for much more than championships; we’re training them for the game of life. It’s our responsibility to teach our athletes that success isn’t just about winning; it’s about realizing there’s more to

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this way, you are coaching them to be successful for the rest of their lives.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. Opportunities to serve a coach or athlete in an “above and beyond” way. Some examples might be: giving a kid a ride to school for an early workout, taking on some extra work for a

2. Jealous or negative attitudes. If an athlete blames his teammate for a missed corner kick or a swimmer negatively criticizes her relay partner

y correct them. When we teach athletes a new way to handle negative emotions and circumstances, we empower them to handle any life situation successfully.3. Ways to reinforce, commit to, and build unity around team goals. For many teenagers, tangible and measureable goals are a great

begins as a goal to improve a mark or time, becomes a case study in hard work, character,

can serve as a launching pad to team unity and

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

MONDAY:“You can have anything you want in life if you help enough other people get what they

TUESDAY:“Don’t aspire to be the best on the team. Aspire

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WEDNESDAY:“Good teams become great ones when the members trust each other enough to

THURSDAY:“If your road to success requires you to lie, cheat, steal, or put somebody else down, you’re not on the road to success; you’re on

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FRIDAY: y y

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MOST VALUABLE


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MOST VALUABLE: FOR CAPTAINS

Brendon Burchard says, “We discover greatness within once we learn to cultivate and y y y

will be microscopic compared to what it could be if you focused on valuing and helping other people.

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safety of others because that’s their job. y y y

see things the casual swimmer doesn’t see.

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differently, an opportunity to see potential in others before they would themselves; and a chance to make a unique difference in the lives of others. It will be tempting to only focus on your points, your highlight reel, and the colleges looking to recruit you (your

leader, you must focus on more than yourself.

y your goals and your teammates’ goals (your

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want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want.”

C


What areas in life are you your own MVP? What areas in life have you not thought about the needs of others?

Who are the individuals that have helped you get where you are now?

What are 3 ways you can thank, celebrate, and acknowledge those

who have made you their MVP?

Who is someone you can make your MVP this week?

What are some ways you can show that person how valuable they are?

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MOST VALUABLE: FOR ATHLETES y y

y the body move. A foot won’t get very far if it’s not attached to the rest of

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How can you focus on more than yourself? What can you do to focus on your team’s goals, so that you all move forward together? MY GOALS

fact that you have an entire team of people who have your back, and you have theirs. Your teammates’ successes are not something to be jealous of, but to celebrate, because they are moving your entire team towards a shared goal. Spend some

y goals.

Goal 1:

Goal 2:

Goal 3:

/// ATHLETE’S CHALLENGE ///When do I feel most jealous of my

teammates?

How do I act when I feel jealous?

How can I act differently to celebrate and encourage them

instead?

Who is someone I know I could be treating better? How can I go out

of my way to make that person feel more valuable?

MOST VALUABLE


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F O R PA R E N T S

MOST VALUABLE: FOR PARENTS y

feel valuable. As parents, we know all about this. Our kids are so valuable to us that we’d do anything for them. We’ll lose sleep to tend to our babies, work overtime to

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script? What if instead of comparing their lives on social media and feeling insecure, our children used it as a tool to encourage others and become empowered?

If one of their classmates posted about winning an award, going on vacation, or making their relationship “Facebook

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how they are jealous, or lacking in some area, to how they can support their friends when something good happens in their lives. It’s a simple, but powerful shift, that will serve your child for years to come.

Be sure to encourage your child in the process. While they won’t always receive praise and adoration for a good deed, our encouragement early on in their lives, will help this become a habit that isn’t dependent on reward later in their lives.

y

and empathy at a young age will help

spur them onto greatness this week!


1. Tell a story of a time someone helped you and the impact it made on your life.

e e child: “What are two ways you can practically encourage, uplift, or help one of your friends this month?”

3. Tell your child about something you do to help others, not for the praise but for the good of the other person. How is it inconvenient to help them, and why do you do it anyways?

4. Encourage your child to actionably help one person per day this week, and tell them you’ll ask them who they helped and how they helped them everyday after school.

5. Reward them for acts of empathy and e e e e

MOST VALUABLE


r FACTOR04W E E K


Teach ourselves to control our emotions and

respond positively

Increase your awareness of

how you react or

Prepare your react/

based on your

Teach our kids lessons about

responding from

R FACTOR y y

y y

y y y y y y y y

Events (E) + Response (R) = Outcome (O)*

y y y y y y y

Chuck Swindoll is famous for saying, “I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90%

If this is true, that means it’s not where you were raised, the family you have or don’t have, or the y y y y

y y y y

What Chuck Swindoll is saying is that the power does not lie in the variables (events & outcomes), it y y

Where are you going to focus your time, energy, and resources? On the variables you have zero y y



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F O R C O A C H E S

R FACTOR: FOR COACHES y

y

y

y y y y y

y

When something frustrates you, you can’t be thinking about yourself and releasing that y

y

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. Opportunities to control your disagreement in proportion to the situation. part of sports as much as smelly locker rooms and

y focus on them? Going ballistic on a referee isn’t going to change the bad call, but it will set a bad example for your athletes on how leaders respond

y

2. Opportunities to make constructive change from a frustrating situation. that are going to frustrate you to the end of your

y they’re coming, but one thing you can always

y y you’re focused on a bad call, you’re not thinking

y Decrease your bounce back time and train your mind to seek constructive change or a positive solution

3. Opportunities to count the eyes. When a bad call is made or a player pushed your last button and you’re about to lose it, pause, look around,

y y y y children, and your players that are looking to you for

y y y they will respond how you respond, because you are y

y y y

in a way you hope your athletes would remember y y

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“You have power over your mind - not

y

TUESDAY: y

y exclamation point on your life will always be the

y

WEDNESDAY:“It’s not the situation, but whether we react negative or respond positive to the situation

THURSDAY: y

able to prevent the worst from happening, I am responsible for my attitude toward the

things do happen; how I respond to them

y y y

FRIDAY:“I’ve learned that something constructive

y y

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R FACTOR: FOR CAPTAINS y reactionary person or a responsive person?

Reactionary people focus on the event, let their emotions take over, lose sight of the y y

y y y y

Responsive people can experience a situation, maintain vision of the bigger picture, own their mistakes, keep their emotions in check, and respond in a way that will help move towards a

y

What kind of person do you want to be?

y

bad call or blowing up on a teammate might feel good in the moment, but we’re not called to release anger on our team; we’re

y y

When frustrating events happen, are you going to blow up and get angry? Or are you going to stay calm, keep an eye on the bigger picture, and seek a solution?

y

follow a play correctly can become just as much of a habit as pulling them aside, asking them where the gap in communication was,

Respond to the events in your life in a manner that is worthy of your character and

y y y a way that will help you and the team move

C


Think of a frustrating event you deal with on a daily or weekly basis.

When the frustrating event happens, what negative emotions are you managing?

(Ex. anger, impatience, pride, judgement, abandonment, etc...)

How do you express your negative emotions? Do you yell? Stom off? Argue? Stuff them down deep?

When you react this way, how do other people react to you? Do they yell back? Get upset? What emotions do you think

they are managing in that moment?

Based on the answers above, how could you respond differently so that frustrating event becomes a learning

e e e e e

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R FACTOR: FOR ATHLETES y y

y y y y y y

y

y y y y y

y y y y

y

y y

y y y y y y y y y

next?

y y y

y y y

Exercise y y

something and lost your cool?

y y spiteful, hurt, frustrated, vengeful, anxious, etc)

y y y y

y y y What did you do?

y y with your standards or the emotions you felt in that moment?

y y y y your actions were in line with your standards? If they lined up with your standards, write your future self a note encouraging yourself to persevere and reminding yourself why it’s important to hold

y

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F O R PA R E N T S

R FACTOR: FOR PARENTS

y

of our experiences reacting and/or

explain how to best respond in every

what we want to focus on this week is teaching our kids the overarching mindset that will help guide them in

y y is throwing a tantrum? Do you still converse with them? Do you ignore them till they collect themselves?

When your child gets angry and slams their bedroom door, responding to them slamming a door is not the most

them that there are more mature ways of handling their emotions that will

emotions and attitude in order to make


1. One of the greatest ways we can teach our kids is by humbling ourselves, owning our own mistakes, and explaining what we learned from them. When was a time your children saw you react

em e e e eve and then share with your children how you could’ve responded differently?

2. What are things in your life that are out of your control? Are you spending energy focusing on them? If so, how could you better focus your energy onto the element you can control, your response?

3. When was a time life punched you in the face and you reacted poorly. Share this story with your child and hear their perspective on how they would’ve responded differently according to their personal/family standards.

4. The age old saying “Life isn’t fair,” never makes us feel better when we’re experiencing the truths of life. Share a time in your life when you did everything right, but things still went wrong. Then share how even though it didn’t go the way you would’ve liked, how it ended up working for your good.

5. Managing and moving past emotional reactions and on towards a solution is a trained skill. As a family, decide on the amount of time you’re going to allow for frustration to linger after an argument. For example, if you someone gets frustrated before school, they have till the end of the school day to simmer their emotions and be able to talk about a solution. Maybe it’s by dinner or bedtime, but whatever it is the goal is to decrease that window over time.

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Show your athletes how to build doors in different areas of

their lives.

Learn disciplines to apply to your daily lives that will lead to opportunities.

Rethink how you use the resources

in your life to build doors for

opportunity.

Instill desire in our children to build

a lifestyle that will lead to abundant

opportunity.

KNOCK KNOCKWe’ve all heard the saying, “When opportunity knocks, you better open the door.” That phrase claims if you’re not in the right place at the right time, you’ll miss your shot.

Let’s get one thing straight: opportunity it not a unicorn. It’s not rare, and it’s y y y

y y

The more doors you build, the more opportunities you will have. The people that believe opportunity is a matter of luck haven’t picked up a hammer to make their own way. They’ve complained more than they’ve constructed.

So what does building doors look like?

Doors are built by two disciplines: being consistent and giving. Are you consistent in the way you treat people? Are you consistent with your studies and schoolwork? Do you give time and energy to strengthening your relationships? Do you give it your all in practice?

y y y y in the future. You need to think beyond the here and now. What you’re doing and learning today will either help or hurt who your future. The choice is yours.

Stop complaining and start constructing.

C O N T E N T O V E R V I E WKNOCK KNOCK


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F O R C O A C H E S

KNOCK KNOCK: FOR COACHESIn the classroom, our athletes are learning how to learn. When they’re with us, they’re learning how to live with character.

This week, our role is to connect the dots of how their actions today will lead to success tomorrow.

Building doors is a lifelong discipline built on:

• Educating oneself • Developing strong relationships • Working with integrity

This week, we’re giving our athletes direction on how to build doors in different areas of their lives using these three principles.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:

1. An opportunity to share the importance of building doors in other areas than sports. As coaches, we want a dedicated team who gives their all to the game. But we would be doing a disservice to these young adults if we didn’t encourage them to build doors in other areas of their lives. They need to hear from the person who demands the most out of them in their sport, to build doors in their education. Encourage your athletes to get a tutor in classes they’re struggling in, tutor other students themselves, or pursue education outside of the classroom.

2. An opportunity to write the names of every person that makes it possible for them to practice and play the sport they love. There are so many

y y

of the people who help keep your athletic program up and running, so your athletes can play the game they

y as important as important as anyone that could recruit them or stick them in a highlight reel.

3. An opportunity to highlight three athletes who live with integrity. Living with integrity means doing your best even when no one’s watching. People who give minimal effort will reap the minimum amount of opportunity. Highlight three athletes who consistently gives their best in their education, relationships, and

they embody that you believe could have a positive impact on the team.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

MONDAY:“Someone’s sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.” -Warren Buffett

TUESDAY: y

success.” -Coach Mackey

WEDNESDAY:“Most people miss opportunity because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” -Thomas Edison

THURSDAY:“Success is where preparation and opportunity meet.” -Bobby Unser

FRIDAY:“How you treat people says a lot more about you than it does the other person.”

-Coach Mackey

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KNOCK KNOCK: FOR CAPTAINSIt’s important to realize that while you’re building a door for opportunity in one area of your life, you can simultaneously build other doors along the way.

If your dream is to make it to the pros. Then go all in! Put everything you’ve got into that dream. You might make it to the pros...but if not, what other doors did you build?

y y y

When it comes to building doors in your life, consistency is key. You don’t hammer one nail into a piece of wood and call it a woodworking masterpiece. You need to create a sustainable method for building doors in your education, in your relationships, and in your work ethic to hear opportunity knock in the future.

Education • The purpose of school is not to learn algebraic formulas or historical facts. The purpose of school is for you to learn how to learn. That means, you need to stop complaining about the fact that you can do everything in algebra class on your iPhone calculator. The formulas are not the point. The point is to listen, study, and apply what you are learning. • By learning how to learn, you position yourself so that you can be teachable in any circumstance. You’ll be able to learn new professional and people skills based on the fundamentals of learning you are taught today.

Relationships• Building doors in your relationships looks like treating everyone with the same level of respect and dignity. It

y college recruitment coach. • Building doors in your relationships means asking yourself what value can you bring to this other person’s life rather than what can you get out of this person. It could be a simple smile or thank you, but always treat people with the same amount of dignity and respect.

Work Ethic y

Why are some people given more opportunities than others? Because they gave it their all in everything they did and pushed themselves to their limit, which enabled them to build doors in places of excellence other people never even attempted to go. • When you run drills, when you clean dishes, when you do your homework...do it to the best of your ability. Stretch yourself to your edge, because that’s where opportunities lie.

Practicing these disciplines daily builds doors and prepares you to take on bigger and better opportunities that come knocking.

C


What can you do differently in school or at home to build a new door in your

education?

How can you treat people better and with more dignity and respect? Who have you disrespected in the past? How can you treat them differently moving forward?

What’s an area in life you can admit you offer minimal effort? Is it studying? Doing your chores? Setting an example for your siblings? What are two practical ways you can work towards doing your best in that

area?

Who is the most consistent person in your life? Who treats people fairly and

equally? Who always strives for excellence in their work? Who is constantly learning something new? Ask that person for their advice on how they’ve built doors in their

own life.

If consistency is key, write down something that stuck out and inspired you this week. Tape it somewhere where you

will read it every morning.

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KNOCK KNOCK: FOR ATHLETESThere is nobody in the history of the world with more opportunity than you have right now. With the worldwide access to knowledge and communication, if you aren’t hearing opportunity knock, it’s your own fault.

Let these words take root in your heart so they will affect how you act: it’s not access to opportunity that leads to success, it’s action.

y

Let’s look at a prime example of access vs. action: Google. In the technology-driven world we live in, access to Google doesn’t seem like that big of a deal. But if you zoom out and gain some

y y y doing anything with it!

Success is created by using a resource to build a door in your life. You could use Google to enroll in a virtual coding class and teach yourself how to build iPhone apps, but are you going to actually do it?

Success isn’t about having access, it’s about taking action. If you don’t do anything with the resources you have, your access to them is worthless.

KNOCK KNOCK

1. When it comes to your goals and dreams, what types of opportunities do you hope will come knocking in the future?

2. Based on your answer above, what relevant resources do you have access to? Think big and small. Is it a world class weight room? Library card? Bike? Internet connection? Mentors?

3. Even if you grew up poor with few resources, you still have the most precious resource that exists: time. Where do you spend your most time, energy, and effort? Are you spending your time building doors for the future or focusing on the chains of the past?

4. Hypothetically, if you were to trying achieve your biggest goal in the next six months, what would you need to do differently today? How would you use your resources if your dream was on the horizon?

5. If this hypothetical situation were true, how would you design your days?

GOALS:This week’s action item for building doors in my education:

This week’s action item for building doors in my relationships:

This week’s action item for building doors in my work ethic:


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F O R PA R E N T S

KNOCK KNOCK: FOR PARENTSWe can give our children all the access in the world to opportunities, but there comes a point where they have to take action in their own lives. Dale Carnegie says “There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making the other person

want to do it.”

they’re doing now will help them live a fuller, more satisfying life later. This week, we’re instilling desire in their hearts to want to build doors for themselves.

y y welcomed concept to teenagers. Teenagers want things and they want them now.

Their brains are thinking in terms of

do things now that will hopefully pane out later is somewhat counter to their default way of thinking.

life under their belts yet to see how choices today affect the outcome of tomorrow. Spending hours scrolling through Snapchat and Instagram vs. spending hours reading and learning a new skill will result with vastly different opportunities.

Building doors is a lifestyle, and while our children are under our roof we are the makers of their lifestyle. This week, let’s create a consistent lifestyle of building doors. Learn about their goals, offer your help, and encourage them to start taking action.


1. What are their goals and dreams when it comes to their education, relationships, work ethic, character, career, etc? What are things they want to learn?

2. Once they share, show them you care. Set aside an hour of time every week to help them build a door in an area of their life. Maybe it’s enrolling them in a pottery class or teaching them how to work on a car. Whatever it is, commit to that hour every single week. Consistency is crucial to building doors and they will follow your lead.

3. Ask your child who in their life inspires them to build doors (peers, teachers, role models, etc). Ask what characteristics about those people are they inspired by.

4. Share your perspective as an adult about how building doors in your life has produced positive results. Share how your actions over time have built doors and then what opportunities knocked on those doors. The idea here is to share the hope

e

5. Let’s not forget that we’re also here to help them gain perspective on things that are preventing them from building doors. Address recurring actions you’ve seen that are not building any doors in their lives, and may actually be closing some. Go through the “Three Why” exercise found on our Parents Resources Page to discover the heart issue behind the problem.

KNOCK KNOCK


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Teach the life lesson that the

failure isn’t fatal.

Hunt for the wisdom to be learned in any circumstance.

Find gratitudefor failure.

Explain the value in consequences.

BECOME PERFECT“Failure isn’t fatal, but failure to change might be.” - John Wooden

The passionate pursuit of perfection is wildly misunderstood.

Many people don’t understand the difference between what it means to “be perfect” and “become perfect.”

y y

y y y y

teachers.

To say it simply:Be perfect = LimitedBecome perfect = Limitless

y with every play, because no one plays a perfect game. Trying to be perfect is not worth our time, but becoming perfect however...now that is worth dedicating our entire lives to.

President Theodore Roosevelt said this:“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

C O N T E N T O V E R V I E WBECOME PERFECT


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F O R C O A C H E S

BECOME PERFECT: FOR COACHES y

playoffs...that’s a pretty huge blow to team morale, but it’s not a fatal blow if we can

y

Failure is not fatal.

“Be perfect” commands a team to win every single game. “Become perfect” encourages a team to give it their all and learn from wins and losses. Start communicating that you’re

y imperfections.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. Your best athletes and observe if they are giving their personal best or rounding down their talents. Are your top athletes performing at 80-85% simply because their 80% is better than everybody else’s

team will round down.

Hold each athlete to their highest standard y y y

and pushing themselves to be the best they can be? Even if they’re winning in the game of sports, they could still be failing in the game of life.

2. Adversity. Observe how your team handled adversity. Do they get frustrated and throw in the towel? Or do they step up to the plate and give it their all?

y the middle of a big game. Your team is either going to

y

y y y y

or an opportunity to succeed in spite of....its all about y

3. Lessons that your athletes aren’t learning.

y

y

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

MONDAY: y y y y

you want.” - Richard Yates

TUESDAY:“Failure is instructive. The person who really

as from his successes.” -John Dewey

WEDNESDAY:“Your trials and struggles will be your greatest source of strength if you’ll let

y

THURSDAY: y

which we learn nothing.” - Henry Ford

FRIDAY:“There is no shame in your struggle.” y

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BECOME PERFECT: FOR CAPTAINSWhen things don’t go right, are you going to focus on the event or your response?

When you focus on being perfect, you see failure only as failure. When you focus on becoming y y

y y y y y different. That’s called wisdom.

y y y

y y

y The more wisdom we gain, the better we will lead. Good leaders aren’t simply trying to avoid failure, they’re trying to do their best, learn along the way, and

The “becoming perfect” mindset gives you permission to fail, but doesn’t give you permission to avoid the lessons available from failing. And in every failure, there is always at least one nugget of wisdom to learn.

y acronym for understanding and applying the “becoming perfect” mindset.

W.I.S.D.O.M.Here is how you can gain wisdom through every

y

W y

y y I

y S y y y someone’s perspective, someone who sees the silver lining. D y

y y

O y y always opportunity to hunt for the wisdom and lessons from any failure. M y even failure becomes a gift. Being grateful shifts your mind

y y step closer to doing it right.

C


When was a time you tried something and failed?

What adversity did you face in that trial? How did you handle it? How could you have handled it better?

List three things you learned from that experience.

ve e e for that experience.

How did that experience help shape you into who you want to become? How could you let it in the future?

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BECOME PERFECT: FOR ATHLETES y y y

y disqualify you from reaching your goals and dreams. Those struggles are the very things that qualify you to become perfect.

Don’t you see? Failures level you up.

y y y y getting shot at, falling down trap doors, and missing all the boosters. You lose a few rounds, but you learn

y path to victory. Your reward? You level up.

y y y y

strength, and gratitude.

y

y y y y y y y

y y

y

y y y y y

you closer to your best friend.)

y y y y

y

y

BECOME PERFECT


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F O R PA R E N T S

BECOME PERFECT: FOR PARENTS“Prepare your child for the path, not the path for the child.” -Anonymous

When it comes to developing character, failures and consequences come with the territory. We will not y y

focus on the failures, but on how to use those failures to further prepare our children for the future.

Every action results in a consequence, good or bad. When our children respect our rules, they might be given y

y y

y grow. Teaching them the cause and effect of their actions is caring for their character.

y y y maintain the “becoming perfect” mindset to see the opportunity.

Viewing your child through the “becoming perfect” mindset allows every opportunity to be a learning

y y y your failure if you allow your child’s failure to pass without teaching them a valuable lesson through it.

Here’s an easy reminder: when failures happen, class is in session.

y y y

them successful human beings.” -Ann Landers

There is value in consequence if we have the becoming perfect mindset.

A tough lesson for teenagers is that their actions have consequences. “But why!?” tends to be common

concepts at a young age.

y a door in your face...once emotions have simmered,

y y frustrated, they’re human. What they’re not allowed to

y that that type of behavior is not an appropriate display of frustration, and there are consequences for that.

come from discipline that we can’t discount.

Consequences build life’s guardrails. Does anyone y

y y Similarly consequences help build our guardrails for our safety and guidance.


1. Share stories of times when you extracted value from a consequence in your childhood and in your adult life.

2. When your children do give good effort and they still fall short, help them gain perspective

e me e ve e e this failure to learn and level up, it will be worth it.

3. As parents, sometimes we can easily tell our e e m e e

e e e e e e e e e e

e e lose, do you still believe this? More importantly, do we show them they are still unconditionally loved?

4. Next time you discipline your child and emotions have subsided, explain the future value behind the consequence you are giving them. Help them learn from that experience and gain wisdom for the future.

e me me ve the developmental capacity to understand how

me e ve become a positive gain in the future because

e ee e e e e ve e e e e ee e e being for your good.

BECOME PERFECT


07W E E K


Launch a team culture that lives in

the realm of endless possibilities, not limiting opinions.

Speak into your teammates’

strengths and ask them questions that help them see their

potential.

Rewire your mind to the “zero waste”

mindset.

Discover your child’s dreams, make them your own, and think

of ways to help achieve them.

WHAT IF?Every great idea that’s ever changed the world found its genesis in two words: “What if?”

People who choose to ask “what if?” are the brave and the bold who choose to look beyond what is. Let’s put it this way- If you’re only asking “what is?”

you are settling in life. You aren’t dreaming, you aren’t looking for ways to improve, you are y y y

People who choose to only ask “what is?” look at life absent of possibilities. They’d rather sit in a boat and go wherever the wind and waves may thrash them instead of asking “what if I pulled up this sail and carved my way through these waves to navigate my own course?”

You have the power to change your life and the world if you ask yourself “what if?” but most people never do. Thankfully we have audacious dreamers and doers like Thomas Edison, Steve Jobs, and Dr. Martin Luther King rattling the status quo.

The secret people don’t tell you is that you are no different than these world changers. The only thing separating you from achieving your goals and dreams is the question you ask yourself.

Don’t settle for what is. Strive for what could be. Ask yourself “what if?”

C O N T E N T O V E R V I E WWHAT IF?


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F O R C O A C H E S

WHAT IF?: FOR COACHESIt’s intrinsic to who we are as coaches to ask “what if?” If we only looked at what is and our team started on the bottom, they’d end on the bottom. We’d never run new plays, never increase workout intensity, and never push our athletes to their fullest potential. In other words, we’d settle.

But as coaches, we refuse to settle. Instead, we focus on areas of improvement, ways to use the talents and gifts of every athlete, and how we can team unity can grow stronger

y y

This week, we want to spread our inherent “what if?” mindset and create a culture that inspires the team to focus on what’s possible. We want to drive that even though society, our family, or our friends may tell us to focus on what is, our team will focus on what if?

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. Opportunity for one of your coaches to share a personal story of how they got to where they are. What was a “what if?” moment in their life when they woke up one day and asked themselves “What if?” and then did something about it. 2. An opportunity to engage the team in a whiteboard session. Write out: “People say it’s impossible to...” and then have the team list out things they’ve been told are impossible. Once they’ve got their list, erase “people” and replace it with “we” and erase “im-” leaving “possible.” Create a culture of possibility, that in your team’s community, these things are possible. One voice, one team.

3. Opportunity for former player or a senior player to share their story of when things clicked for them - that they don’t have to take the road all of their haters expect them to walk down.

There are few things more powerful than a story that reaches someone’s core, ignites a dream, and catapults them to go after it. Through the connection of story, we want to show the athletes that they are not alone in their doubts or fears, and that they won’t be alone in their quest for creating a better life and better world. Connect with stories and conquer fears.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

MONDAY:“Life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact...everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you...You can change it, you can

TUESDAY:“Champions aren’t made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them; a desire, a dream, a vision.” -Muhammad Ali

WEDNESDAY:“Only he who can see the invisible can do the impossible.” -Frank L. Gaines

THURSDAY:“What if I fall? Oh, but my darling what if y y

FRIDAY:“I never lose. I either win or I learn.” -Nelson Mandela

WHAT IF?


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WHAT IF?: FOR CAPTAINS y y

your fear- it’s the most boring thing about you. The most interesting thing about you is your creativity, your passion, your love, your joy, your faith — all that stuff is fascinating.”

To live in your fears will make for a boring life. This week, help your teammates refocus to see outside of their fears and into their strengths.

Fear is a boring, lame, basic attribute we’re all wired with. Gilbert explains “[Fear] is not precious, it is not special, it is not singular to you. It’s just the one we all got wired with when we came in. Don’t listen to it, onward!”

y y under the radar’ or ‘coasting by’ seem like desirable paths.

Let this be your warning: do not be tempted by laziness or comfortability. Own your strengths, let fear to roll off your back, and move forward. Don’t choose what’s reasonable, what’s acceptable, or what’s most likely. You were created for more.

Everyone have the ability to ask themselves “what if?,” but some people may never ask themselves that question because they are blind to possibilities. A leader’s role is to guide their fellow teammates/colleagues/friends towards greatness. Sometimes it takes a leader to call out blind spots for that person to move forward into the fullness of who they were created to be.

C


When was a time someone spoke into your strengths? How has that

changed your life?

What “what if?” in your life lead you to believe you could be captain?

Name 3 teammates that you’ve recognized have great potential but

don’t see it themselves or aren’t applying themselves. What skills

or strengths do they have that are unique to them?

Find an opportunity to talk with those teammates this week and ask them a “what if?” question

that helps them see their potential. Ex. What if our team had the best running back in the state? What if

you were that running back?

WHAT IF?

WHAT IF?


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WHAT IF?: FOR ATHLETESYou can waste a lot of time on the road to success if your focus is on the wrong thing. In football, practice equates to about 92% of the sport, while the game maxes out at only 8%. Are you going to call the 92% a wash if the 8% doesn’t end

with a win? That would then make it a 100% waste of time. This is a losing mindset.

Don’t think like this.

Sell yourself to being all in regardless of the outcome and enter into the “zero waste” mindset. You are not wasting practice time, weightroom time, study time, family time...none of it. You are growing in every step of the way, so that if the 8% doesn’t pan out, you’ve still gained 92%. The process is so much greater than the end.

The outcome isn’t what matters.

y y I learn.” If an outcome didn’t turn out the way you wanted, focus on what you learned and how you will approach the situation differently next time.

It will always be a win if you learn from the process.

1. What are areas in life you only focus on the outcome and don’t appreciate the process?

2. What’s the paradigm shift you’ll need?

y

4. What if you applied yourself everyday?

5. When was a time you were not happy with the outcome of something? What were some things you learned? What are some things you are thankful for?

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F O R PA R E N T S

WHAT IF?: FOR PARENTSThis week your child is being challenged to look beyond what is and ask “what if?” We’re asking them to peer into what’s possible beyond what exists today. We

for their lives.

This week, we want to learn about their goals and dreams - their dreams for “what if?” Be the guide your child needs to create a life they’re excited about.

Let’s think back on a time when you weren’t jaded by the world, a time when people thought your dreams were inspiring instead of ridiculous, a time before fear became our #1

As adults, we can lose our “what if?” mentality. We settle for “what is?” and stop asking those audacious questions that constantly fall out of the mouths

and lack of jadedness that comes with being a child is something to cherish and celebrate. Your child could be impacted by society’s opinions and expectations, but what if they made an impact on society instead?

You want the best for your kids, if you’re really interested in supporting your child, work towards supporting their goals.

Give them the advantage of a strong support at home, made up of people who believe in them, who don’t laugh at their wild dreams, and who spur them onto greatness.

Let them dream, then help them succeed.


1. Ask your child to write down 3-5 life goals for their life. On a separate sheet of paper, you write down 3-5 life goals for their life. Once

e e e aloud. Then read your list out loud, immediately crumble up your paper, and rewrite a new list with your child’s goals.

2. Ask your child: As you risk for your dream, what does failure mean to you? The goal here

e em e e e e as not giving their best, not learning from the process, not trying, or only focusing on the goal and bulldozing through the entire process.

3. Now what does that look like practically? Watch the “Success Is Not Trying” video on our resource page.

4. Parents ask child what do you think I would think if you failed at reaching your goals? Help them understand you’re on their team, you’re in their corner, and you want to support them no matter what.

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Use the “3-why” method to zero in

on the root reasons behind excuses.

Begin to see your circumstances as resources rather

than anchors.

Discover the emotional and mental “bricks” you’ve been carrying around and the next choices you

must make so you can leave them behind.

Help your child develop a “no

excuses” perspective by encouraging them to take ownership of

their choices.

NO EXCUSESWe give excuses all the time.

“I’m tired...it’s not fair...it’s hot.” We give them all the time, but what have excuses ever given us?

Excuses do nothing but hold us back from reaching our full potential.

Excuses are the brake pedals to success. If you want to wait for your dreams, if you want to slow down your growth, then keep making excuses. But if you want to use every day as a training day towards success, then live by the mantra “no excuses.”

Never once has an excuse unlocked a door to success. It’s never happened. Even when the excuses are valid, even when you have every right to give an excuse, they still have never unlocked a door to success.

Why? Because you cannot change the past. Excuses limit your growth. Excuses pull you back even when you want to move forward. Excuses limit your success.

Excuses don’t change anything, they focus on what you don’t have rather than looking for ways to use what you do have to get you where you want to go.

In everything we do, we are faced with a choice: a choice to take ownership of our lives or make excuses for it.

This week, we are honing in on the truth that ownership takes us further than our excuses.

C O N T E N T O V E R V I E WNo Excuses


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F O R C O A C H E S

NO EXCUSES: FOR COACHESAre you an excuse enabler or eliminator? You can only be one. As coaches, we have an important role to not allow excuses into the culture of our teams. It’s our duty to teach our athletes how to take ownership of their choices and behavior. Our brains operate on a survival mentality. We’re naturally wired to do what will best protect us. If excuses meet that need, then we’re naturally going to take that route. What we must teach our athletes is that is our

brain’s way of seeking comfort, and growth only happens as we stretch outside of our comfort zone.We have to show them that the best play is always to take ownership for their actions, because failure resides in the land of excuses. Examine the way your players handle loss, failure, and shortcomings in practice or the game. You may listen to excuses your players rattle off and want to pull your hair out, but instead of getting frustrated at the excuses, use those moments as a teaching opportunities. Let this quote sink in this week: “There are no bad teams, only bad leaders.” Coaches, we are responsible for our teams. If we’re telling our players not to give excuses, we can’t either. If our

the excuses.

y y y y utilizing the “3 why’s?” (See below).

y y y y motivation, direction, empower them.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. Opportunities to use the “3-why” method. As you’re helping your athletes take responsibility for their actions, use the 3-why method. Excuses are the symptom. What is the cause? (Example conversation below)

Coach: Why didn’t you run the play?Athlete: I didn’t know the play that was called.Coach: Why haven’t you been studying your plays enough to know them?Athlete: I’m too busy at home.Coach: Why are you too busy at home? Athlete: Because I have to take care of my three younger siblings because my mom isn’t home from work till late.

y y y leadership and guidance for their good. Sometimes certain athletes will

to best lead them. 2. High stakes situations. When stakes are high, excuses run rampant.

arising in those scenarios by encouraging players to take ownership for what’s on the line.

3. Most common excuses used by your players. On a whiteboard, list the most common excuses that will no longer be accepted by your coaching staff or your players. Embed a culture that functions with no excuses.

4. A chance to tell a story where example where excuses led to missed opportunities. excuses” mentality and outperformed your team. Maybe it was a time they brought in a ringer at the end of the fourth quarter, your team didn’t give their 100% throughout the game, and lost out on an opportunity to win.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

MONDAY: y

- Coach Mackey

TUESDAY:“There may be people that have more talent than you, but there’s no excuse for anyone to work harder than you do.” - Derek Jeter

WEDNESDAY:“We’ve got to remind ourselves that decision is the ultimate power.” - Tony Robbins

THURSDAY:“Own your mistakes or your mistakes will own you.” - Coach Mackey

FRIDAY:“Most people never run far enough

y got a second.” - William James

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NO EXCUSES: FOR CAPTAINSIf there is one thing to be said about good leaders, they are resourceful.

Lack of resources is less important than being resourceful with what you have. If you are casting blame (a.k.a. giving excuses for) onto external circumstances, then you will lose the respect of your team. Giving excuses is complacency. It says you’re not willing to seek a

solution, you just want to mull over something that doesn’t move the situation forward.

If you are wrapped up in excuses, your focus is on the excuse instead of your goal. You’re focused on y y y y

goal at hand.

Take ownership of where you are and what you have, and move forward. There are no excuses that will unlock a door to success.

You know what does unlock a door to success? Decision.

“People are not willing to give up their complacency for the change that they’re saying that they want.” - Coach Mackey

Good leaders not only make, but own their decisions, whether good or bad. Great leaders make and y

they see the reason for choosing the greater good

When you decide you’re not going to make excuses and own your leadership decisions- that’s when you are on the road to success.

Are you going to choose complacency or the power of choice?

Choose to see your circumstances as resources rather than limitations.

Choose to own your mistakes rather than make excuses for them.

Choose to seek solutions instead of complain about the problem.When you decide that your lack of resources will not keep you from becoming resourceful, that’s when you begin your journey of success. Did you not have a good father or a good mother? Don’t let that stop you from becoming a good father/mother.

Stop justifying your behavior with excuses, let those past pains and current circumstances to motivate you to be better.

C


How are your excuses keeping you from being resourceful?

How can you exchange excuses for resourcefulness?

What’s an excuse you’ve used in the past two weeks? What was it

about?

How could you have taken that opportunity to be resourceful

instead of accusing?

What are excuses you hear from your team? Whats a resource you have to counter act that excuse?

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NO EXCUSES: FOR ATHLETES

bricks are the things we experience and believe about life. Even though we might not have chosen the bricks in our bag, one they’re in there they fall into only two categories:

Category 1: Bricks you chose to put in your backpack. Category 2: Bricks you chose not to take out.

Life may drop a brick in your bag unexpectedly, but it’s your choice to keep it there. Making excuses for why the bricks are in there, doesn’t lighten the load. Every excuse is actually a missed opportunity to have grown, learned, or gotten better.

The weight of this backpack is like an emotional anchor that slows you down from achieving your goals.

y y y success.

1. What “bricks” (circumstances, insecurities, etc) are weighing you down? Are you willing to take it out of your backpack?

2. Recognizing it as an excuse, what has prevented you from taking the brick out before now?

3. How do you feel when you focus on that brick?

4. Imagine that brick out of your life, how do you feel? Based on that, how would you behave if that brick was out of your life?

5. How do you believe others react to you behaving this new way?

6. What change can you make today to start taking that brick out of your bag?

DEEP DIVE: - Bring it out of the echochamber of your own fears, it loses it’s power. - If there’s this reason I didnt do it, I’m still acceptable/redeemable/valuable, but the truth is you ARE valuable outside of that.

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F O R PA R E N T S

NO EXCUSES: FOR PARENTS

y y

Language is one of the biggest factors in developing a worldview lens. Two people may interpret the same experience completely differently simply because of their worldview lens.

y y

The words we use hold great power over our thoughts and feelings. The words we speak to ourselves and others can chemically rewire our brain and our default thoughts about the world around us.

Our role this week is to encourage our child to use what we like to call “expensive language,” or in other words, words that cost you something or take ownership in. How often do we hear or use “cheap language” phrases like “I don’t have time for that”?

Using cheap phrases like that are teaching our kids to put the power in external factors instead of their own hands.

To explain a little further, there was once a physical therapist who at the end of a session, she would show her patients exercises to do at home so that they have the best chance for full recovery in the shortest amount of time.

Time and time again she’d hear the words “I don’t have time for that.” She’d then respond to them by saying “Repeat this back to me - ‘Taking care of my body just isn’t a priority to me right now,’ and then tell me how that feels.”

She made her patients own their choices, and refused to see them unknowingly blame “time” for their lack of recovery. She wanted to see her patients recover and live healthier lives, so she refused their excuses and their cheap language, and made them take ownership of their choices.

The exercises would cost them something, but if they truly wanted to get better, then they’d have to make them a priority.

This week, our job is to illuminate the fact that everything is a choice, and then encourage our child to start taking ownership of their choices through expensive language.

To hear more on this topic, visit our resource page


1. As a family, talk about 3-5 negative “cheap phrases” any family member uses and then write the corresponding “expensive phrases” next to them.

2. For the next 7 days, challenge your entire family to only use expensive language. If someone uses cheap language, positively encourage them and ask how that could sound if you use an expensive phrase? (For a longer list of cheap and expensive phrases, visit our resources page.)

3. It’s so important to make your language e e ve e e e

have. Every time your child says they can’t do something, have them replace that with they “choose” not to do that thing.

4. Complaints are synonymous with excuses. This week, implement a “no complaining” rule. Not tolerating complaints will start embedding that practice into your child’s life in and out of the home.

5. Kids can easily become entitled and feel like they “need” everything. The coolest video game, the latest iPhone, the brand name clothing...

e e ee e me e e script for our kids and have them take ownership of their decisions. Give them opportunities to build your trust for more privileges or earn money to buy something they want.

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Take advantage of athletes asking

“why?” as teaching opportunities.

Refine your leadership to be as strong during

practice as you are on gameday.

Dissect your week to discover where you spend your time.

Create a Disagreement Agreement to

prepare for parental “trench moments.”

5 P’sWhen is the game really won? Is it when you run up the scoreboard? When the clock ticks out to zero? When you stride a few inches longer than your opponent?

While all those are technically true, they don’t tell the whole story.

You will only spend 8 percent of your time competing. You spend 92 percent of your time

If you want to outscore your opponent on Friday night, you’ve gotta outwork them Saturday-Thursday. Victory y y y y

win in practice.

Prior Preparation Permits Proper Performance.

You’ll never reach the fullness of your potential so long as you don’t prepare to do so. You may win the game, but you will not reach your potential if you do not prepare.

It doesn’t matter how fast you are if you’re not your fastest. It doesn’t matter how strong you are if you’re not your strongest.

If you want to be successful in the 8 percent, you’ve gotta prepare in the 92 percent. Practice and the game are directly linked. You can tell how much you love your team by the choices you make grinding at practice. You can tell how much you want to win in the game by the choices you make everyday during and after school.

Everything you’re doing today will prepare you for what you do tomorrow. If you want to know what kind of person you’re going to be in the future, look at what you’re doing now. Prior preparation permits proper performance.

Want to change the future? Change what you do today.

There is no change without change.

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F O R C O A C H E S

5 P’s: FOR COACHES y y y y y y

falling on unattentive ears?

Back in the day--think of when Bear Bryant and John Wooden were prime time--respect was everything. Coach’s

But there has been a generational switch. Blind respect is gone. Students need purpose.

We’re coaching the why generation.

“Coach, why we runnin’ suicides?”

“Coach, why are we just practicing corner kicks today?”

Think back to the R Factor. You can’t control the complaining, incessant question asking and disrespect, but you can control how you respond. Instead of seeing this as a lack of respect for authority, what if you saw this as a coachable opportunity, a chance to explain?

Answer their why. Help them think through every inch of practice. Saying, “Because I said so,” doesn’t cut it. Solidify their training in reason. Engage them mentally. Give them a reason to run. Give them a reason to put in the 92 percent.

Remember: Prior preparation permits proper performance.

In answering their why, coach without words. The U.S. Army follows a threefold leadership paradigm called Be-Know-Do. There are qualities that a leader must be, know and do. It’s simple, concise, and effective.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR WAYS TO:1. BE: Loyal Direct Kind

2. KNOW: Interpersonal and relational skills Tactical skills Active listening skills

3. DO: Act consistently y Act kindly

Coaches communicate with more than words. As you answer your athletes’ why’s, teach in a way that does more than share vague principles.

Explain with the way you live your life. Explain with how you work during the heat of practice. Explain with how you treat them during the 92 percent. Explain why prior preparation permits proper performance.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“Prior preparation permits proper performance.” - Coach Mackey

TUESDAY:“Give me six hours to chop down a tree

the axe.” - President Abraham Lincoln

WEDNESDAY:“When opportunity comes, it’s too late to prepare.” - John Wooden

THURSDAY:“If you want to know what you will do, look at what you are doing. And if you want to change what you will do, change what you are doing today. What happens in the 92 percent, affects the 8 percent during the game.” - Coach Mackey

FRIDAY:“It’s not the will to win that matters—everyone has that. It’s the will to prepare to win that matters.” - Paul “Bear” Bryant

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5 P’s: FOR CAPTAINSIn the early 2000s, Mel Gibson starred as Lt. Col. Hal Moore in the classic war movie, We Were Soldiers. Lt. Col. Moore lead an Army battalion during a bloody battle in Vietnam. In the movie, Lt. Col. Moore was famous for saying, “When we go into

In both cases, Lt. Col. Moore is the picture of a leader. He followed through with his word, and he led his men by taking responsibility by opening and closing the battle. Those in charge don’t get to slack and call the shots. They understand the responsibility and opportunity of their

y

y applause. Still sound fun?

We all know the Spider-Man quote, “With great power comes great responsibility.” As a leader, y y shape the speed of the game. It’s exhilarating. But it’s a position that’s earned, not given.

As the team captain, you need to be as committed to the 92 percent as you are to game-day. When there is no glory, lights, or

y and the last to leave? When fans aren’t on the sidelines cheering you on, are you still showing up and giving your all?

Everyone wants to hear their name on the loudspeaker. But that, too, is earned. Prior preparation permits proper performance. To perform at your peak: practice, practice, practice.

It’s earned by the 92 percent you give at batting practice or practicing penalty kicks. Whatever the sport, whatever the tedious task, it’s the consistent movement that yields success. Prior preparation permits proper performance.

y You give your all in the 92 percent. And you will inspire your team to follow your lead through this work ethic.

C


Do my actions and attitude in e m v e e e e

team’s morale at practice?

How can I become a more dedicated leader during practice so

m e m e e me me day?

m e example for my team to practice

well?

m em me e

practicing?

e e e e m ve e e

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5 P’s: FOR ATHLETES y y

If you want win in the game, you’ve got to win in practice. Prior preparation permits proper performance.

Why does it matter if you’re fast, if you’re not your fastest yet? Why does it matter if you can bench 200, if you know you could eventually work your way up to more weight? Aim to become better, faster or stronger. That’s real victory.

There are 168 hours in a week. Adrian Peterson, Michael Phelps, LeBron James, Steph Curry, Serena and Venus Williams, Lionel Messi, and Abby Wambach all have 168 hours in their week. So does Beyonce. The difference between fame and just being a face in the crowd comes down to how you spend those 168 hours.

You standout among your peers when you make the most of your 168 hours. You become better when you make the most of the 92 percent between games. Prior prior preparation permits proper performance.

If you want to be successful in the 8 percent, you’ve gotta prepare in the 92 percent. Practice and the game are directly linked. You can tell how much you love your team by the choices you make grinding at practice. You can tell how much you want to win in the game by the choices you make

y y

Athlete’s Exercise: y y y

In the end, it’s up to you. If you don’t like the outcome, spend your time in different places. Will you look back and wish you sent more Snaps? Probably not. But you will look back and wish you spent a few more minutes practicing a technical part of your sport to become incrementally better.

Where do you spend the majority of your time?

This week’s exercise is to honestly dissect the 168 hours in a week to see where your life’s 92% is spent.

How many hours are you spending sleeping, eating, studying, practicing, mindlessly scrolling through social media, spending time with family and friends...?

Figure out where your 92% is spent, and you’ll see what your future lies.

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F O R PA R E N T S

5 P’s: FOR PARENTSIt’s easy to think about the big milestone moments of being a parent -- graduation days, college acceptance letters, family vacations, weddings... These are our “gametime” moments.

However, where true parenting happens are during the moments we don’t post on Facebook. When we’re at our wits end and we beg our children to go left and they go right type of moments.

That’s the grind of parenting that allows us to get to the big milestone moments and celebrate.

We know there are really hard times when we get so frustrated at our kids, but it’s in those moments, as hard as they are, that we need to put in the practice. Those moments are our 92%.

As parents, we don’t have it all together, but we’ve blindly committed to love and care for our children and y y

those moments.

Parents win in the trenches, not on the mountain tops.

Parenting is hard, and we can’t possible prepare your for every nuanced issue or “trench moment” that may arise. But we can give you principle that you can apply in your home tailored to your family.

To prepare for trench moments, it’s good to foresee things down the pipe.

For example - disagreements. How can you prepare for disagreements that when one sparks, you’ve practiced how to handle such situation? Collectively as a family, write rules engagement for working through a disagreement. This agreement will help prepare for those head-to-head arguments and

y create your own in the exercise below.

It will give your family a center point to come to. So when one party breaks a rule, the other can say, “Let’s remind ourselves of the agreement we’ve made. I understand you’re frustrated and that’s why you said that, but “I dont care” is not an acceptable phrase to articulate your problem.”

y y out with no avail.

Parents win in the trenches, in the daily grind of dishes and 9-to-5’s, not on the mountain tops of parenting breakthroughs. Embody this lesson by preparing and making the most of your time and life.


ee e e e e e e e e m me

disagreement agreement.

e e e e all parties agree to say or not say during an argument. For example:

e ee e e m ve e e e m ee

e e ee e eve e e e ve e e e e e

e ve eme eve e ee abide by during disagreements.

5 P’s

2 W o r d s C h a r a c t e r D e v e l o p m e n t • S e a s o n 1 • W e e k 1 0

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Discern whether you are ranting or

coaching.

Recognize the foundation of your

leadership.

Transfer your goals from your “hear” to your heart to your

actions.

Explain the whys behind the

responsibilities you give to your children.

EIGHTEEN INCHESPresident Theodore Roosevelt was a man of action.

He led the Rough Riders through battle, set apart millions of acres of land for conservation, and held wrestling matches in the White House. Yes, wrestling matches.

President Roosevelt once said, “Knowing what is right doesn’t mean much if you don’t do what is right.” He, too, knew that knowledge had to travel 18-inches to make a difference.

He could have known the impact of sustaining the environment, but if he didn’t actually do something about it, what would it matter? Then, we wouldn’t have Yellowstone National Park, or the National Park Service. The importance of our land was more than just head knowledge.

The knowledge traveled the 18-inches from his “hear” to his heart and then to his actions. Let’s do the same.

difference between nailing the upper 90 shot and missing the goal. In track, 18 inches is the difference between losing a race and breaking records.

y y information travel 18 inches from your “hear” to your heart.

Whatever is rooted in your heart is what will come to life.

Meditate on these lessons. Absorbing them into your heart and put them into action. This action will y

C O N T E N T O V E R V I E WEIGHTEEN inches


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F O R C O A C H E S

EIGHTEEN INCHES: FOR COACHESHave you ever found yourself asking “Why aren’t my athletes getting it?” There’s a reason athletes do what they do (or don’t do): they do what’s in their hearts. You might’ve told your athletes 100 times to do something better, but if they continue to ignore your instruction, that piece of head knowledge hasn’t traveled the 18 inches to their hearts.

Our players are not always going to feel like doing things, but they must have a deeper understanding of something if they’re going to latch onto a piece of knowledge for longer than a drill.

This brings us to ranting vs. coaching. Have you ever noticed the difference between someone who rants and someone who coaches?

Ranters talk, typically in a loud voice, at their athletes. Ranting tries to change actions by telling people what to do. Coaches, on the other hand, motivate students and activate their hearts through developing relationships and universal truths for them to hold onto.

Coaches help guide the knowledge their athletes hear down 18 inches to their heart, and then inspire and motivate their athletes to take those heart-felt lessons and turn them into actions.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR:1. Chances to outline clear, between-practices, actions steps for your athletes to take toward their goals. Whether that be getting enough sleep, studying an extra hour, cutting social media time in half...whatever it is, make sure their progress is not just happening during practice.

2. “Moments of Accountability” This is a moment to hold your athletes accountable to those between-practices actions steps. Create a way for athletes to check in with a coach, captain, or fellow athlete at the beginning of practice for a direct report on their progress.

3. Time to be mindful of the instruction that you’re giving. Are your instructions actually things athletes can act on? It’s really easy to quickly

y y

moments into coaching moments. Ask yourself: Am I ranting? or am I coaching for positive change?

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:

y you will act and think and do.” - Coach Mackey

TUESDAY:“One man practicing sportsmanship is far better than 50 preaching it.”- Knute Rockne

WEDNESDAY:“Make sure your worst enemy doesn’t live between your own two ears.” - Laird Hamilton

THURSDAY:“It is in the action that change happens.” - Coach Mackey

FRIDAY:“Your positive action combined with positive thinking results in success.” - Shiv Khera

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EIGHTEEN INCHES: FOR CAPTAINSWhat makes you a leader? What makes anyone a leader? As team captain, y y y behind your name? Leaders show initiative. As we learned last week, leaders

y and cast the vision for the future. It’s not about demanding, it’s about showing. And in order to sustainably show your team leadership, you have to let knowledge and wisdom travel to your heart.

Leaders inspire people to move forward.

A head full of tactics and skills does not mean that knowledge has migrated 18-inches to your heart and transpired into your actions.

The best athlete without a heart for others is just a task master. A good athlete who cares but doesn’t encourage action is like the team

for others and drives action is a true leader.

Leadership is about treating your teammates how you want to be treated. It’s about showing your friends a better way to live. It’s about giving your all--no matter who’s looking.

y y the knowledge and compassion must travel 18-inches to your heart.

C


What is the foundation of your leadership? Is it your title or actions?

What is your commitment level to your teammates? Do you put their needs and e e me e e

a way to get what you want?

Are you using your captain position as a way to help your teammates more and put their

ee e e you want?

Are you the most committed player on your team? If not, why not? Why do you not care as much as the most committed player? What information hasn’t traveled from your head to your heart? If so, what

are two actions you can take to grow in your commitment?

We all take things for granted from time to time. Have you taken your captain position for granted? In order to not let that entitled feeling grow, we must recognize at least one reason why we are thankful for the captain

position. Each day this week, right down one reason why you are grateful to be captain.

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EIGHTEEN INCHES: FOR ATHLETESAre you guaranteed success when the perfect play is called? No. Why not? In any sport there are competing forces that try to take you down. Just because you know what to do doesn’t mean it’s going to happen the way you plan. If the right play is called, but not executed well, it’s worthless. In other words, if right thinking doesn’t turn into right doing, it is worthless.

The same goes for the game of life. Making a plan does nothing if it doesn’t take root in your heart and turn into action. y y y y

intentions at heart--whether you believe that or not when he’s demanding suicides.

Respect means you have a listening ear and process what your coach says. It means seeing value in his or her’s words of wisdom, and taking those words to heart. Next comes action. Respect coupled with action is a sure recipe for success. If you are coachable and listen to what your coach says, let it into your mind, let it sink into your mind, and then take action.

Do the drill, perform task, and run the play. Over and over again. That repetition will drill those lessons deep into your mind and heart. Listening without doing is worthless. It amounts to nothing. If you want to learn the plays that will win games, start being coachable. Let the lessons travel the 18-inches from your head to your heart today at practice and you’ll see the success on game day.

Dreams can sometimes be born out of our mind, and sometimes they come straight from your heart. Either way, thinking about your dreams and even feeling the passion for your dreams won’t make your dreams a reality.

At some point, those thoughts and feelings have to translate into actions.

Your dreams are achievable, but it does you no good to just hope, want, tweet, snap, or post about your dreams if you don’t pair real life actions with it.

Action is everything.

Athlete’s Exercise:Head: What’s a dream you have? What are your personal and/or team values you live by?

Heart: Why do you want to achieve that dream? Why is it important to you?

Heart: What is the connection between your values and your dreams? How will living out your values help you achieve your dreams?

Action: Are you acting in alignment with your values? If so, how? If not, why not? How can you improve in this area?

Action: Are you doing something today that brings you a step closer to your dream?

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EIGHTEEN INCHES: FOR PARENTS y y y

about consistently do homework? It’s a typical story in most households. It’s tough to keep your kids dedicated to their responsibilities!

y y

The trick is to cast a vision for our children as to why we’re asking them to do certain things. For example, if you tell your child to pull the shower curtain shut after they shower, that tells them nothing. Explain to them that by pulling the shower curtain closed, it’ll prevent mildew from growing on the curtain liner.

we’re dealing with a generation that asks “why?” for everything. We don’t have to like this generational characteristic, but we can use it to our advantage if we stop getting frustrated at it.

Our children do not need to accept things at face value, because they the world’s information y y

children. If we want better results from our children, we must cast a vision as to why we’re asking them to do something.

y a narrative, you are helping the information sink from the head to the heart. That simple explanation will help information travel 18-inches from their heads to their hearts and then to their actions.

Routinely encourage your kids to take know-how and turn it into action. As a parent, the best way to do this, is to model it. Explain the rhyme and reason of why you do certain things the way you do. Use words to express your why. This will help your kids get into the habit of thinking through ideas and putting them into action.


1.What responsibilities do our children dodge the most?

e e e ve e e e e behind those responsibilities. Have we given any other e e e e

e e e e e e e e e e e

How can we use these moments as teaching moments? e m me e m

believe every member of your family makes it stronger, and during this season of life, making their bed makes the family stronger because it takes it off your plate and can focus on other things like planning a family outing or spending time with an aging grandparent.

4. Choose a few seemingly small responsibilities and right a short list at to the ripple effect each of these have by getting them done or not.

ve e e e e e actually create an overall harmonious family dynamic. Help your children see how they play into the greater good of the entire family.

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Reverse engineer your season down to

each practice and drill.

Discover the one thing you can do today in order to

achieve your goals tomorrow.

Prioritize the steps you need to take to

achieve a 3-6 week goal.

efine your family’s story and the

role each family member plays.

ONE THINGWhat is the one thing you can do today that will help you reach your goals tomorrow?

This question is so powerful and important because your future success is dependent on what you do today. It’s not what you might do, what you actually do.

Now when you think about your big, audacious goals what do you feel? Do you feel like they’re impossible? Do you ever think, “Eh, why bother?”

You don’t just stumble into success. It’s a planned road. In order to reach the big dreams, you must seize the daily little steps it takes to get there. Every single day, say to yourself, “What’s the one thing I can do today to reach my goals?”

y y

y step before that, and then the step before that. Eventually, you will track back to the present to discover the one thing you can do today.

Every day, your one thing is different. Tuesday’s task is different than gameday’s task. It’s about a bunch of little tasks and practices that lead to one big outcome.

Everybody wants to go 10-0, but before that you have to go 9-0, 8-0, 7-0 and all the way to 1-0. So for today, focus on being 1 and 0. Before we can do anything else in the future, we have to take care of business right now.

It is so easy to be overwhelmed by a huge, future goal. But if you break it down into bite size actions, it’s not too shabby.

For most, benching 250 pounds is impossible. But what if you just focused on adding one pound each day? y y y

Day after day, week after week, month after month ask yourself what is the one thing you can do to get one step closer to success. Soon, you’ll look back over your life trace the path it took to meet all your goals.

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ONE THING: FOR COACHES y y y

You have to win the majority of your games, right?

To do that? Beat out your cross town rival.

To do that? Win a few home games.

To do that? Get your team’s skill level up.

To do that? Hold two-a-days to make up for summer break.

y

To do that? Increase your athlete’s speed.

To do that? Make your athletes run an extra lap every practice until their speed increases.

You see what we did? We reverse engineered the season and mapped it out practice by practice.

LOOK FOR AN OPPORTUNITY TO (do this with your team and/or coaching staff)1. Reverse engineer your goals. Follow the method above and methodically plan out the season. Break it down so that each step along the road to regionals has purpose.

2. Point out the individual athletes roles in the grand scheme of the season. e e each athlete/coach contribute towards the larger goal.

3. Give vision and grounding. Notice athletes/coaches that are too far in the future or too grounded in the present.

- If someone is too focused on the future, they’re not doing enough to take care of business today. Ground them where their feet are. - If someone is too focused on the present, they are missing the long-term vision of where they’re headed, and they might be stepping in the wrong direction.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“You will never change your life until you change something you do daily.” - John C. Maxwell

TUESDAY:“Your future success is dependent on your work today. It’s dependent on you doing the right work, right now.” - Coach Mackey

WEDNESDAY: y

easy and do the great things while they y

must begin with a single step.” - Lao Tzu

THURSDAY:“Before we can do anything in the future, we have to take care of business right now. Let’s be 1-0 today.” - Coach Mackey

FRIDAY:“The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a person’s determination.” - Tommy Lasorda

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ONE THING: FOR CAPTAINSWhen it comes to the game of sports and the game of life, persistence is king.

You can talk yourself out of anything, but it’s only the leaders who commit to the next best thing are the ones who will succeed.

y y y y y to take one step at a time, so start with where your feet are planted and go forward from there. These small steps will snowball into great victories.

y y y team. You gotta pull double duty.

Discipline yourself to be more persistent and determined to do the next best step. This level of focus is hard to beat. The famous Babe Ruth said, “It’s hard to beat somebody that won’t give up.”

Persistence will lead to long-term gain.

Sometimes people will jeopardize their dream by not taking the next step.

y y wanting to get out of bed in the summer for a morning workout. Look, if you don’t feel like taking

okay with not reaching your goals. It’s that simple.

Morning workouts lead to success deep in the playoffs.

You are in control of your life. YOU are the gatekeeper.

There are times we don’t feel like doing the next step, and that’s okay...but then you have to be okay with not reaching your goals. It’s that simple. You are

y long as you’re okay with reaching your goals, then don’t do the next one thing.

We’re about to introduce a process that will help you take the loftiest goal and break it down to something you can do tonight. Your momentum will starts to snowball. It’s just like the principal of physics - an object in motion stays in motion.

Take one step at a time. Stay persistent. Lead by example. Your team will follow.

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What is one thing you want to achieve in the next 3-6 weeks?

Why do you want to achieve it?

What would that meant to you in your life?

What is something you need to do to achieve that goal?

Now, let’s get really practical. Keep breaking down the steps you need to take until you get to a step you can take today. Reduce it down to the smallest actionable step.

Now map out the next 3-6 weeks of how e e e e e

you reach your goal.

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ONE THING: FOR ATHLETESSuccess comes in short steps.

y y y

y y your long term goals.

y y y y workouts.

But what comes before speed? Practice. This means showing up to practice every day--whether you feel it or not.

The same goes for doing homework. To steal more bases, you have to stay on the baseball team. You can’t steal bases if you’re not on the team, and you’ll be kicked off if you can’t keep your grades up. So what does this mean? Make good grades.

y y y

Struggling to focus on tonight’s math homework? Your friends hitting you up on Snapchat repeatedly and you can’t y

How do you steal more bases than you did last season? Here’s how: 1) Finish tonight’s homework. 2) Finish tomorrow’s homework. 3) Keep the grades up. 4) Show up to practice. 5) Slowly become faster by making the most of the running exercies 6) Steal the bases.

Success is made possible because it’s sequential, not immediate. Even in a single class you go to focus on the little y y y

can do right now that will help me successful in 5 minutes?”

Then do it.

For more on this topic, listen to Episode 65 of the Plus One Podcast at PlusOnePod.com.

Athlete’s Exercise:Take two sheets of paper and fold one of them down the middle (top to bottom).

y y y need to take in order to accomplish your goal.

One the right side of the second (folded) sheet of paper, prioritize your list from your #1 priority to y y

Now, write your #1 on the left side and cross it out on the right. Now look at your priorities as that #1 is your sole focus and #2-10 are the enemies of completing #1. They are distractions and you need to focus in on #1 until it’s done.

Then move down your list...check off #1 and move #2 over to the left side. Now #3-10 are the enemies.

Continue this process until you’ve completed your task list and achieved your goal.

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ONE THING: FOR PARENTSParents, our kids tend to have vision no further than the length from their face to their cell phones. It’s our role as parents to give them a broader perspective of life outside of themselves.

y y y y for the whole? Do they understand that making their bed frees up time so mom or dad can make them a healthy lunch in the morning so they can perform well at practice?

Most likely, they don’t.

y invite people into them. That’s why we love books, movies, and human interest pieces so

We must do the same for our families.

y y has a narrative that your children are a part of.

We need to paint the picture for them that their everyday decisions matter and have lasting change on the family’s story.

y y goal for your family to reach as a whole.

Find the one thing each family member can do daily that will lead everyone closer to that goal. Repeat it tomorrow and then the day after that. One small decision, a day at the time, in the right direction is powerful. Make special note on how little decisions add up, compound and make a big impact on your family’s story.


What do you want the legacy of your family to be?

What is your family’s mission statement?

What are your family goals?

e e e e e m mem e move the group towards your legacy, mission statement, and goals.

Help connect the dots for your children on how a small task today can amount to great success later.

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Build a “me too” team culture by

facilitating honest dialogue amongst your athletes and

coaches.

Learn to manage pain and emotions

well in order to lead effectively.

Refocus your view on pain to be forward-

thinking.

Seek to understand what it’s like to be

on the other side of your parenting.

PURPOSED PAINPain is inevitable.

You cannot dodge it. You cannot escape it. Pain comes for all of us. Everyone’s pain looks different, but no one avoids it.

Uplifting message, right?

Over the course of our lives, we may have to experience the pain of abuse, violence, broken homes, family struggles, stress, physical pain, emotional pain, mental pain, bullying, betrayal...the list could go on.

If we all experience pain, that means you are not alone in your pain. There is someone out there saying, “You’ve experienced that? Me too.”

Some pain is not our fault. We are not responsible for the cause of our pain, but we are responsible for what we do with your pain.

This may sound like tough love, but think of it like this...you don’t have to remain a victim to your pain. You get to choose how that pain impacts your life, whether that be positive or negative.

Do not let pain be something that happens to you, turn it into something that happens for you.

Pain asks the question “Why did this happen to me?”

Purpose asks the question “How can this pain work for me?”

Pain will come, and when it does what will you do with your pain?

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PURPOSED PAIN: FOR COACHES y

You either have teammates by your side sweating in the locker room or fanatic fans in the adjacent stands cheering their heads off. Sports create a community of people who are bonded by the common thread of athleticism.

This week we want to highlight and encourage the “me too” moments to help your team become more united in their triumphs and struggles. If we can make those deep connections amongst our athletes we could create a strong support system that will take them further than we ever thought possible.

Something we must drive home to our team is that there is no shame in their pain. We need to create a safe environment for our team to get real with their pain so they can purpose it. If they leave their pain in the dark or don’t admit they have pain, they’ll never learn how to manage pain and become resilient over it.

As coaches, are we exemplifying that level of vulnerability to our team? Are we open to sharing our struggles and pains with our athletes? Are we willing to be authentic for the greater good? Are we showing our team how to recover well after a painful event?

This week, let’s show our athletes there is no shame in their pain.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. “Me toos” across the team. Your athletes, even those with the most contentious relationships, have

mm e e e mm amongst your athletes is: “Step to the line if...” Split

e m ve em e e e e e ee em e e eme e e e e e e

2. Opportunities to share your coaches’ stories: e e e e e e e

with. We have a responsibility to share our story, e e e m e e em along their journeys. As coaches, this responsibility is m e ee e e e e e m eve

m m v m e e e e e e e

3. Opportunities to learn more about your athletes’ stories: Create an environment where your athletes

ve e ee e e e e e e

e e e e e e e e e ee

questions with your athletes.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“I am responsible. Although I may not be able to prevent the worst from happening, I am responsible for my attitude toward the inevitable misfortunes that darken life. Bad things do

y character and the quality of my life.” - Walter Anderson TUESDAY:“You don’t throw a whole life away just because it’s banged up a little.” -Tom Smith, Seabiscuit (2003)

WEDNESDAY:“Listen: those who hurt you in the past cannot continue to hurt you now unless you hold on to the pain through resentment. Your past is past! Nothing will change it. You are only hurting yourself with your bitterness. For your own sake, learn from it, and then let it go.” -Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth am I Here For?

THURSDAY:“You have responsibility for your pain.” -Coach Mackey

FRIDAY:“What if every problem and pain you had was life happening for you – not to you? We all ascribe meaning to the events in our lives, even the little

you choose can instantly transform the way you look at your entire life. If you master meaning, you master life.” - Tony Robbins

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PURPOSED PAIN: FOR CAPTAINS“Tough times don’t last, but tough people do.” - Robert Schuller

As a leader, you have to be tough. But what does that practically look like?

There are going to be times when people won’t like your leadership. Look at any leader in history and y

y y y y willing to call the shots, you have to be able to take the shots.

to stand up for your values, but in a controlled manner. If your opposition is throwing punches or name calling, do not stoop to that level. As a leader, you must rise above and handle pain with integrity.

y y y punch when everybody expects you to. Don’t get locked up into meaningless quarrels.

Managing emotions makes you tougher.

Integrity is only strengthened when it is tested.

What does throwing a punch, diving into argument, or getting angry accomplish? Typically those things don’t accomplish a whole lot other than getting some immediate emotional releases.

There are going to come times in your leadership y y

to throw something across the room, but great leaders have the skill to temper their emotions.

They pause.

They realize that in that moment, their integrity is being tested, and they do everything in their power to pass that test. The momentary pause might feel painful, but that painstaking emotional self-control will allow great leaders to keep their heads on straight and lead effectively. Strong leaders are slow to anger.

Choose to grow as a leader not grow in your anger.

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e e m e e e ve em e e e e

response?

e e e e e react? Do you let it swallow you hole, or

ee e e e e tunnel?

In what ways can you manage your em e e me with a better response?

m e e emotions well (anger, frustration, impatience, etc)?

What characteristics, habits, or practices e ve em

to for inspiration?

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PURPOSED PAIN: FOR ATHLETESPain isn’t fair; it doesn’t make a lot of sense.

The sooner you can wrap your head around that reality, the sooner you will be able to take that pain and do something with it.

Your goals don’t care how unfair your start line was, whether you did or didn’t experience pain in your life, so what are you going to do?

Are you going to spend time with those who complain about the past and their pain? Or are you going to be someone who uses their past and pain as stepping stools on your way to success?

y y y

The longer your journey, the stronger you’ll be. It’s just like the weight room - the more you hurt in the weight room, the farther you’ll be able to throw, stronger you’ll be able to tackle, and faster you’ll be able to run.

Watch this video - https://twitter.com/MackeySpeaks/status/899595376340193280

“Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.” - Lance Armstrong

It does not matter how unfair things are. Your goals do not care. Success does not care where you start from. In the words of Brian Kight, “It doesn’t matter, get better.”

If you are going to sit and wallow in your pain, then you do not yet see the whole picture. If you are going to blame your pain for the bad parts of you, then you have to give it credit for making you the worthy person you are today.

1. How would you y

2. How would others y

y y y y y y y

y y y y y y y y

y y y

Athlete’s Exercise:Fold a piece of paper in half (vertically), on the left side of the paper name three pains in your life. On the right side of the paper, list three ways to purpose each pain.

For example:Pain: Failing chemistry class

1. Connect with a tutor and put in a few extra hours of studying per week2. Build a study group with students who you aspire to be like3. Talk to your teacher about earning extra credit

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PURPOSED PAIN: FOR PARENTSHave you ever caught yourself saying something like, “Sorry, kids, you’re going to need counseling because this.” Of course, this is said with a garnish of humor, but the reality is, we’ve all been there! No parent is perfect. Not for

lack of trying, but because no such thing exists. We all have some parental shortcomings. That’s why it’s so powerfu to ask, “What it’s like to be on the other side of my parenting?”“PREPARE YOUR CHILD FOR THE PATH, NOT THE PATH FOR THE CHILD.”

It’s a given that our children will experience pains in life and pains from our parenting. It’s unavoidable on both fronts and that’s OK.

Now, this is not a license to cause pain; we must be eager to grow and learn about ourselves and our kids to become a better person and a better parent. It is however, permission to let yourself off the hook of striving to be a pain-free parent.

What would happen in our homes if we adopted (or doubled-down on our commitment to) a parental growth mindset? In other words, what would happen if we committed to working harder at growing our parenting skills, as we did our retirement accounts?

What would happen to our relationships if committed to learning and growing because, (spoiler alert) we aren’t perfect parents?

The mark of good parenting is not wether or not we cause pain, but how quickly and appropriately we respond and grow from it. Part of good parenting is teaching our children how to respond to situations that

times in life that hurt.


e e e e e parenting?

e e e e reaction?

e e e ve ve em eve e

e e achieving your family goals?

How can you improve your parenting in me

What practices can you put in place to e m e me

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Create a team culture that

celebrates progress over perfection.

Discuss problems early and often to work towards

solutions.

Own your mistakes, so they don’t own you.

efine what rules, standards, and

expectations your family has.

OWN IT“The best players learn from their mistakes...That’s what separates the leader on the court from the pack.” Pau Gasol

Nobody likes making mistakes. They’re embarrassing. They’re uncomfortable. They make you confront the fact that you are not perfect.

But, something powerful happens when, instead of shying away from the fear of making mistakes, we embrace mistakes as a welcomed teacher. NBA star Pau Gasol said, “The best players learn from their mistakes and cope with failure as well as success. That’s what separates the leader on the court from the pack. And if you fail, you need to learn from your mistakes. Making mistakes is part of the learning process. Suffering defeat should serve as a lesson to keep going, to work at being even better than before.” Mistakes and the discomfort that comes with them can be one of the most powerful tools for our lives, if we let them. But, if all we do is run away from situations where we might make a mistake, we’ll never grow.

When we let go of the fear and negative power of making mistakes, there’s no limit to what we can do.

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OWN IT: FOR COACHESThe fear of mistakes can be paralyzing. We’ve all had athletes who have future-tripped themselves right out of success by obsessing over what will be if they get it wrong. Will I be punished, embarrassed...worse? Fear of letting coach, team, family or self down can absolutely crush teenagers.

This week, let’s work to create a culture where our athletes understand that the fear of mistakes is unnecessary; where the right mistakes can be propel your learning, not paralyze your life.

Owning (and even welcoming) mistakes isn’t about letting standards fall by the wayside. It’s about exploiting the underutilized tool of mistakes. Understand this: mistake are going to happen; it’s a given. What isn’t a given is learning from mistakes. That has to be coached.

Our athletes aren’t stupid. If they aren’t rewarded for responding well to mistakes (growing; learning from), they’re going to stop making them-- with great consequence. When they stop making mistakes, they stop growing. If failing at trying something new is punished or ridiculed, they will stop trying to do anything new.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. An opportunity to celebrate a culture of improvement. When a player makes a mistake, encourage him to think about the mechanics of what caused it. Then, try to brainstorm a solution. Make it a collaborative effort that focuses more on what can be gained from this mistake than

e m e e e

2. An opportunity to catch a player doing something right. This week is all about letting our athletes know that it’s ok to make the right mistakes. At the same time, we need to continue celebrating the things that they do right. Watch out for a change to congratulate a player on doing something correctly--whether she’s done this thing the

me e me stumbling.

3. An opportunity to ask “Why?” When a mistake is made, try to get to the root of the problem. This shows the player

e e e e e e e e e e m e

m ee e e e m m

e e e e e m e

e e ee e ee m e m e e

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“Nobody who ever gave his best regretted it.” - George Halas TUESDAY:“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” - Tony Robbins

WEDNESDAY:“When you own your mistakes, your mistakes don’t own you.” - Coach Mackey

THURSDAY:“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” - Robert Kennedy

FRIDAY:“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail Better.” - Samuel Beckett

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OWN IT: FOR CAPTAINS y y

drops the game winning out in the bottom of the 9th, that isn’t your fault (i.e. you weren’t the causing agent), but you, as the leader, do have responsibility for your team and their results.That probably doesn’t sound fair, but leading a team means

accepting responsibility for how that team performs, whether that’s on the court now, or in the boardroom later in life. Share the wins, share the losses.

Everyone has a role to play the success or failure of the team, but as a leader, you have y y

blamed in defeat-- if you want to call the shots, you have to be willing to take the shots. When struggles, problems, or mistakes are made-- regardless of who’s fault it is-- you are responsible.

In times like these, leaders look beyond the mistake, problem, or trial and map out a path to a solution. The earlier you accept responsibility for a problem, the easier this is. “Early and often.” is the advice of Gen. Colin Powell.

y y problems they pretend aren’t problems.

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e e ve m e e e e e e e v e e e e e e e e m e m mem e e v

write all the things that are someone else’s responsibility. The center space is for the things that you and your teammates are responsible for.

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OWN IT: FOR ATHLETESThere are two types of mistakes: effort mistakes and coachable mistakes. Effort mistakes are unacceptable. I repeat: effort mistakes are unacceptable. If you’re not making your mistakes at 1000 mph, you’re wrong.

Coachable mistakes, however, are mistakes that come from being “in process”, and are powerful tool in your development.

You shouldn’t be ashamed of making coachable mistakes. Those kinds of mistakes can be the best learning tools, if you let them.

Athlete’s Exercise: y

or in the classroom. Keep it in mind as you answer these questions:

1. Was it an effort mistake or a coachable mistake?

2. Did you own the mistake? When it happened, did you take responsibility for the mistake or did you pass if off on someone or something else? If you don’t own your mistakes, they will end up owning you.

3. Did you take it personally? Was your self-talk, “I AM a mistake” or “I MADE a mistake”?

excuses. Dig deep to the root cause.

5. After you’ve answered each question, ask yourself: Did I handle my mistake as well as I could have? If the answer is no, write out what you can do next time to make the next mistake your best mistake.

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OWN IT: FOR PARENTSWe’ve all made mistakes. Hopefully we also learned something from them.

make them. Often we want to spare them any kind of pain or embarrassment.

We would much rather have them learn from the mistakes others instead.

Our kids will make mistakes. Everyone does. But if we can help teach them to analyze the mistakes of others, maybe we can help them avoid some of the personal cost.

We have rules and standards for our families to help our kids avoid making what can often be painful mistakes. They may not understand why we have those expectations, though.

Kids are notorious for asking “why?” about everything. As a parent, it’s tempting to use the “because I said so” card. But, if we really want to help our children make fewer mistakes in life, it might be better to indulge that eternal curiosity and explain the reasons behind our rules, standards, and expectations.


ve e e e e e e e e e ee e e e m

1. Rules are the things that tell our kids what they can and cannot get away with. They are e me e e e e e e e e e

e e e e e me e e e2. Standards are usually less overt than rules, and they tend to pertain to everyone in the

m e m eem e e e m e e be met with disappointment than punishment. They could be something as mundane as “We won’t leave dirty dishes in the sink” or as intangible as “We will always try to treat each other

e e e me m e e e m e e e e e e e ve e e e e e e e e

e e e e ve e me e e ve e me e e e e ve

e eve e ee m e e e e e e e e

5. Write down the most important answers from the three lists, and put them somewhere in the house where everyone will see them regularly. At the end of a week, talk about any differences

ve e e e e e e m e e

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Focus on continuous growth and

improvement through marginal gains.

Practice integrity when no one is

looking.

Manage how you spend your time throughout the

week.

Celebrate honesty, even when you’re

angry.

WHY NOT?When Jimmy Carter, who would become the 39th President of the United States, was a

y head of the U.S. Nuclear Navy.

asked him: “Did you do your best at everything?”

Given that this was an interview, it probably would have been in his best interest to just say “Yes!” emphatically. But, he couldn’t give that yes and retain his integrity.

So, Carter admitted, “No sir, I didn’t do my best at everything.”

Then, the admiral asked him a simple but powerful question: “Why not?“

We need to ask ourselves this question. Why not give my very best to every single thing that I do?

When we give our best effort, we’ll have no regrets, regardless the outcome. That’s because giving our best means taking control of our situation to the greatest extent possible. It’s true that if we show up to practice and

no shame in a loss like that.

y y y y y y y y y y y y

Probably not. So, the next logical questions is “Why not?”

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WHY NOT?: FOR COACHESWe want our team to be growth-oriented. For that, after every practice and every game, we have to focus on the question: Was that your best? If the answer is no, it’s an opportunity to

y y y it our best? Whether the team is entering the season as the favorite to take district or at the

back of the pack, there’s always room for improvement.

y y y y y y

y y y

y y y y y y y y

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. An opportunity to audit your practice. Look at the goals coming up and break down what will it take to achieve each goal. Let’s get as granular as we can with this. Reverse engineer practice to ensure that what you are doing in practice is exactly what is needed to be success for in the game.

2. An opportunity to gauge tiny improvements. At the end of practice, take a minute to look for and talk about that 1% gain for the team as a whole or for individual athletes. Did they shave a few seconds off of the usual time to run a mile? Did they make one more perfect serve during drills? These things are small, but if they shave off a few seconds today, and then a few more seconds tomorrow, the gains will grow.

3. An opportunity to practice continuous improvement. Our players may have achieved a certain level of success, but that just means we have to keep pushing the bar higher. What’s one thing that the team has down so well that they

e ee e to where they can do it while sleepwalking.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“Without self-discipline, success is

TUESDAY: y y

scoreboard.” - Coach Mackey

WEDNESDAY:“Keep working, even when no one is

THURSDAY:“We are what we do repeatedly. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a

FRIDAY:y

the odds are against you.”

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WHY NOT?: FOR CAPTAINSWhen Jimmy Carter told the admiral that he hadn’t always given his best, he wasn’t just

y

y y not cheating. It involves how we interact with other people.

y y y

No one else is involved in your integrity, and most of the time, other people won’t even see it. That’s kinda kind of the point because integrity is what we do when no one is looking.

y y y y synonyms.

y y a square. In the same way, honesty always comes from integrity, but an act of integrity doesn’t necessarily involve a moment of honesty.

y y y y do you always keep it? These are actions that don’t really involve you being honest, but they are deeply enmeshed with your integrity.

If a cashier forgets to ring up an item, do you say something? If a volleyball brushes your arm before it heads out of bounds, do you let the ref know even if they didn’t see it? These acts of integrity do involve honesty. Lies of omission are still lies.

What each of those examples all of have in common is that few people would know whether or not you acted with integrity in that situation. But you would know.

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1. Integrity is important for everyone, but why do you think it’s especially relevant to good leaders? What would happen if you, as a leader, didn’t act with integrity during games? Or during practice?2. Think of a recent time when you acted with integrity. Did anyone else see it? Did it matter if they did? Why?3. Integrity encompasses our entire moral code. That includes things like kindness and compassion. How does your integrity affect the way that you treat your friends? Strangers? Your teammates?4. Even small moments of integrity can have a big impact on our lives. This can be things like holding the door for someone or giving somebody back the dollar they didn’t notice they dropped. Name as many small acts of integrity as you can.5. Put a coin in your left pocket in the morning. Throughout the day, anytime you act with integrity, move the coin to your right pocket. Anytime you don’t act on your integrity, move it to the left. See if you can keep in the right pocket all day.

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WHY NOT?: FOR ATHLETESEverybody has things they know they should do, but they just don’t. Maybe you know you should be getting 9 hours of sleep every night, but instead you’re up until 2am playing

y y y be dedicating 2 hours to homework every night, but instead you put it off until the next

y

Everyone’s favorite excuse is: “There’s not enough time.” But that’s all it is--an excuse.

y y done if you have the awareness and the self-discipline to actually do those things that you know are good for you. You know that you feel more alert when you go to bed earlier and get more sleep.. You know that you feel better after a workout. You know you aren’t panicking about your grades when you have your homework or studying under control.

You have all this time to accomplish whatever you want and need to do. So, how are you using that time?

Athlete’s Exercise: y y y y

y y y approximate amount of time it takes.

y

y y

y y y anyway?

What are you doing with that time instead?

Going forward, are you going to use that extra time to do something productive that will further your goals? Why not?

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F O R PA R E N T S

WHY NOT?: FOR PARENTS y

y y y y y y y

y y didn’t do our best to pass those values along to them.

y y y

y y

There will be times when our child tells us something that we would rather not hear. Like that he threw a y

to let her drive came from a pole that she backed into.

It’s tempting to get angry and mete out punishment for the offense right away. But these moments actually y y

the neighbor didn’t see it happen, how would they know who did it? She could have told us the dent was just there after she came out of the store.

Basically, in a lot of situations, our children could get away with lying to us. When they choose to opt for honesty instead, that is a moment to celebrate.

y y clear that whatever punishment they’ve earned is for the action--not the honesty.

If we can do this consistently with the small things, our kids will be less likely to fear being honest with us regarding the big things.


Consider these tips to encourage kids to exhibit honesty and integrity:

1. Start a discussion by asking your kids: what does honesty mean to you?

e e e e e e e e reaction? Were they embarrassed? Talk about the reasons that honesty would have been the better choice.

e m ve e e e e not, jot some down.

4. Share a story about a time when you had to choose whether or not to be honest. How did you feel? What were the consequences?

5. For more tips on how to instill honesty in your kids, check out the More Resources page.

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Trust the process. Recognize that there is a difference between a leader’s title and a leader’s

actions.

Work towards your goals one step at a time.

Celebrate the little moments as well as the big milestones.

OVERNIGHT SUCCESS We’ve all had daydreams of being “discovered” out of the blue for our awesome talents.

It looks like it happens all the time: a YouTuber’s video goes viral or a hot new musician pops up from nowhere. Outside looking in, success just happened like

they wished on a lucky penny and *poof* there it was.

But, internet celebrities, musicians, and pro athletes have given us a skewed view of what it means to be successful. So often, those big careers make it seem like success just happens overnight. One day, he’s joe schmoe, and the next, he’s world famous.

It doesn’t work that way, though. Success isn’t something that just happens. These celebrities weren’t y y y

for that recognition.

There might be one moment that catapulted them into the world’s eye, but there were thousands of tiny moments that led up to it. That’s because overnight success takes years to achieve. It starts with small steps that lead to bigger things. Overnight success is a long game with a lengthy build up and a

Nobody daydreams about the long hours that go into success, but the reality is that it takes commitment and hard work.

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OVERNIGHT SUCCESS: FOR COACHESTrust the process. Commit to the process. Work the process.

Nothing happens overnight. That’s why there’s a process and a plan in place. Because as long as we stick to it, we will reach our goals. But there’s more to it than just trust. It’s not just about believing in the process. We have to also be committed to it.

Beyond that, all the trust and commitment in the world is just empty words if we aren’t also working the process.

When Sam Hinkie, former general manager of the 76ers, coined the phrase “Trust the process,” he was thinking about his plan to make the draft process work for his team. But, the reason it blew up into such an iconic phrase is because beyond that immediate, surface-level mentality, it actually speaks to all team strategies and long-term goals.

The process for the 76ers was using the draft to their advantage over time. The process for our team might be catching freshman talent early and cultivating it to get a dynamite team four years from now. Or the process for our program might be about instilling good work ethic in our athletes early, so they can succeed beyond sports as they become adults.

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THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. An opportunity to explain the process. What’s your long-term goal or plan? Some people can work well with blind faith, but others need something more concrete. So take time to line out some of the details and how this plan will build the path to the ultimate goal.

2. An opportunity to demonstrate your commitment. e e mm me m

yourself? For your coaching staff? For your athletes? Try me em e e e

commitment.

n n e e e e e fi en Although this is a long game situation, the hard truth is that

m ve e me to reach your goal. What are some ways to streamline the process? Are there any hacks you can implement without short-circuiting the whole thing?

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“There’s a process to becoming an overnight success.” - Coach Mackey

TUESDAY:“Excellence is the gradual result of always striving to do better.” - Pat Riley

WEDNESDAY:“Nothing will work unless you do.” - Maya Angelou

THURSDAY:“Some people want it to happen. Some wish it would happen. Others make it happen.” - Michael Jordan

FRIDAY:“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.

y toward your goal.” - Bruce Lee

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OVERNIGHT SUCCESS: FOR CAPTAINS“You don’t need a title to be a leader.”

Nobody’s quite sure who originally said that, but nobody denies that it’s true. Of course, the opposite side of that coin is true, too. Just because you have a title, doesn’t

mean you’re a leader. Anybody can be given a title that declares them a leader, but if their actions don’t match up with that title, it’s all just words.

But you also have to remember that becoming a good leader takes time. Figuring out how to be a good leader doesn’t happen overnight anymore than other types of success do. It takes time to develop the skills, wisdom, and maturity to effectively lead others.

Learning to be a great leader takes time, but sometimes you’re just thrown into it and have to learn as you go. Maybe somebody else thinks you’re ready for the new challenge, even if you aren’t so sure.

Here are a few things to keep in mind on your road to growing into a great leader:

- A leader in title only thinks they have all the answers. A leader in action knows when to take advice and suggestions.

- A leader in title only expects others to put in all the hard work. A leader in action knows that he has to lift his share of the burden, and then some.

- A leader in title only says, “I’m in charge, so you work for me now.” A leader in action says, “I’m in charge, so I work for you and the team as a whole now.”

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Answer the following questions as honestly as you can:

1. If something goes wrong during a game are you more likely to:

- Accept responsibility even if it wasn’t your fault- Blame the teammate who made the mistake

2. Do you believe that:- There’s always more to learn- You already have all the answers

3. If somebody corrects you, do you:- Consider the merit of the correction- Assume that person doesn’t know what they’re talking about

4. When you think about goals for your sport, do you focus more on:

- You personal goals- The goals of your team

5. When the teams wins, do you:- Share the victory as a group effort- Take all the glory because you believe your performance deserves it

Look at your answers. Do you think your responses show that you’re a good leader? Where do you need a bit more work so the title matches the action?

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OVERNIGHT SUCCESS: FOR ATHLETESWhen you hear the phrase overnight success, what do you picture?

A YouTuber who turned into a sensation with one video? A fourth-string player who miraculously saved a game with his hidden talent?

It’s easy to see those things, and go “that girl is so lucky” or “I wish I had that kind of talent.” But that idea completely misses the point. Because the truth is, those “overnight” success stories aren’t the product of just one night. They are built on a thousand nights of effort and determination.

Think about this: pretend that overnight success as popularly imagined was real. Somebody with a bit of talent comes out of nowhere with the next big thing. But what happens after the public gets tired of that one thing? For example, say it’s a YouTube video that gets super popular overnight, and everybody knows who this YouTuber is. What if they only had that one video?

Well, they could make another one, right? It’s possible, but if they don’t have the background of all the effort built over time that goes into real, lasting success, the chances of their next video being as big as the one that launched them into the public view is pretty slim. That’s called a one-hit wonder, and that is not real, lasting success.

Sure, “overnight” success might come from the next thing someone did. But that “next thing” was only as explosive as it was because they spent a lot of timing building up to it. They stacked the wood a bit at a time

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You might say “I wish I had that,” but the truth is you already do. You have the same time and determination required to build something that starts small and grows until the whole world can see it.

The next game could be the difference, but only if you put in the work at this game and this practice. y

Athlete’s Exercise:1. Success comes from small steps that lead to big outcomes. What are some small steps you can take today to hit your biggest goal?

y y y think they had to take to get there? How could you do something similar?

3. Remember a time when you accomplished a goal that took a lot of time and effort. How did you feel once you accomplished it? Would it have meant as much if it hadn’t taken as much work?

4. Do you have a 5-year plan? That might seem like a long time, but some goals take that long. The really big ones take longer. Can you plot out, even in the most general terms, where you want to be in 5 years? What’s it going to take to get there?

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F O R PA R E N T S

OVERNIGHT SUCCESS: FOR PARENTSParenting doesn’t stop when our children are born. Or when they learn to walk. Or once they go to school. It doesn’t even stop once they graduate.

Parenting is the ultimate example of a long term goal. We want our kids to grow up to be happy, healthy, and generally good people. Reaching that goal requires more than one

y more challenging by the fact that sometimes our role changes.

y y it’s well worth it in the end.

Sometimes it feels like kids grow up too fast. But that’s just because the big milestones--the things we celebrate and even cry over--tend to overshadow all the work we put in to help them get there.

When we take him to get his driver’s license, we forget all the hours we spent scared for our lives while we were getting him ready to pass the test. When she gets accepted to her dream school, we forget the long nights helping her study to get the grades or perfect the application.

In the hustle of everyday life, we sometimes forget to pause and look at how much effort we’re expanding to reach our shared goals. Raising our child to be someone we’re proud of is our main goal, but we share in their goals, too. Their wins are our wins.

Too often, we don’t take time to appreciate all the little things that make parenting worthwhile. We can always take more time to celebrate the little moments that go into reaching those big, winning moments, though. Because inevitably, when we reach a major milestone, like sending them to college, we’re going to think it all happened too fast.


1. What’s something you’re proud of about your parenting?

2. Ask your child: What’s something you’re thankful for about your parents?

3. What’s a big milestone coming up that you and your kids are looking forward to? What small steps are going to happen before you get there?

4.How can you take time each day to celebrate the little things about being a parent?

5. What’s one of your favorite memories about when your son or daughter was small?

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Demontrate how to put negative events in perspective and avoid a cycle of negativity.

Pinpoint your destination, so there’s no temptation to

turn back.

Discover what your level of grit

means for your life and goals.

Celebrate your child’s focus, and

encourage them to strengthen it.

FOCUS FORWARD Forward is not just a direction. It’s a mindset.

Having the focus and tenacity to keep moving forward no matter what distractions come your way is a powerful tool.

The greatest predictor of success is not intelligence, physical strength, natural aptitude, or even a combination of these things. Instead, the greatest factor in whether or not a person can accomplish their goals is one thing: Grit.

Talent or intelligence is a dice roll where not everyone will roll the numbers they want. y y

intelligence is pretty irrelevant.

Because no matter how good or how smart you are, if you don’t have the grit and tenacity to keep moving even when things are hard, you’re still not moving forward.

“Grit is living life like it’s a marathon; not a sprint.” -Angela Duckworth

Grit is the willpower and determination to pick a goal and get to it, no matter what tries to get in your way. It’s the focus and tenacity that keeps you moving forward even if the whole world is trying to push you backward.

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FOCUS FORWARD: FOR COACHESKids learn by example. Every moment we spend around them, we are teaching them how to behave and how to function as an adult.

If they see us lose control over a bad call or a player not hitting his mark, they will get mad, too. On y y y

Kids value what we value. They react how we react. Our athletes will value what we value, and respond and react how we teach them.

The ability to keep things in perspective is an important life skill for people of any age. And like most life skills, it’s best picked up young.

Perspective is usually a phrase relegated to the “glass half full vs. glass half empty” realm. But it’s about more than just optimism and pessimism. The way we perceive an event determines our reaction to it. And that reaction in turn determines whether we repeat that event or not.

We already know our athletes are watching us to see how we’re going to react to events. All we have to do is reframe our own perceptions, so we can demonstrate for them how to focus on moving forward instead of falling back into repeated mistakes.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. An opportunity to reframe the most recent game. Whether the team won or lost, there is an opportunity to frame it in a way that encourages keeping things in perspective.

2. An opportunity to call out distractions. Get the ball rolling by naming one of your distractions, analyzing why that distraction occurs, and how you’re going to lessen its impact going forward. Have your staff and payers alike volunteer their own distractions and open a discussion about the causes and remedies. In the end, reiterate what the goal is and the reason that none of these distractions are going to stop you from reaching it.

3. An opportunity to celebrate an improvement. We all have those frustrating moments where we see the same mistakes being made over and over on

e e e e me e m me e e e e

and they stop making that one mistake that drives us crazy. But how are we reacting to that moment? Is

e e e e e e e e m me

and use it to demonstrate a reaction that shouts joy instead of frustration.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

MONDAY:“What is in front of you is greater than what is behind.” - Coach Mackey

TUESDAY:“People with grit believe that failure is not a permanent condition.” - Angela Duckworth

WEDNESDAY:“It’s stunning to me what kind of impact one person can have if they have the right passion, perspective, and are able to align the interest of a great team.” - Steve Case

THURSDAY:“The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater their power to harm us.” - Voltaire

FRIDAY:“Whenever something bad happens, keep calm, take a few deep breaths, and shift the focus to something positive.” - Roy T. Bennet

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FOCUS FORWARD: FOR CAPTAINSAs a leader, you have to be the focal point standard bearer for your team. You have to decide what to focus on, so that it is clear for others.

Every mission needs a compass, and you need to be that for your team. Distractions are everywhere just waiting to lead you away from your goal. If you don’t have a clear idea of where you’re trying to go, neither will your team.

Just as a compass points the way north, a leader points the way forward for their team.

So, where are you going?

Being a compass for others also means refusing to turn back. There is nothing behind you, or even to the right or left of you, that matters. Those locations hold nothing but distractions waiting to lure you into a swamp of “coulda” and “shoulda.”

But how do you make sure there is no going back so the temptation isn’t even there?

While not looking back is the goal, it actually helps to take a page from history in this case to show you how to keep moving forward. When Cortez landed in present-day Mexico, he wanted to be sure that his soldiers would only be focused on what lay ahead of them, instead being distracted by what they left behind.

To ensure their full focus on the goal at hand, he burned the boats they came in.

A little extreme? Maybe. But it got the job done. There was no direction to go but forward. Turning back was no longer an option. There was no plan B.

When Plan A is the only option, it’s amazing what you can accomplish.

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It’s impossible to be a compass for others if you’re not even sure which way is North. You have to choose the right focal point, and you have to believe in it to the point where you

e m e e e e e e e e e e

mindset.

e e e e m e e e

makes waking up in the morning worthwhile? For now, list whatever pops into your head. You can always weed things

e e e me m Use this list to answer the next 3 questions.

2. Are you good at it? Do you have or can you obtain the skills necessary to pursue that passion?

ve e e ve to do to obtain them? Are you willing to do those things?

3. Do you have a support network for this goal? Do other people think this goal is reachable? Just because you’re the one picking the destination doesn’t mean others can’t give valuable insight. Ask people whose opinions you trust whether they believe you’re on the right track.

e ee e m e ve e all, but if you don’t feel at peace with your choice of focal

eve e e e stay intact; the distractions will be able to lead you astray.

ee me and can do? Don’t think about this one too hard; just try to feel it out.

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FOCUS FORWARD: FOR ATHLETESDo you pick a target and persevere to reach it, no matter what? Do you stick with it even when you’re bored or sore or tired? Can you keep the end in sight and ignore distractions

If you answered “Yes” to all of those questions, there’s a good chance that you have a healthy dose of grit.

Grit is refusing to make up or accept excuses for why you aren’t succeeding. It’s taking responsibility for your own progress.

Grit is keeping the goal in sight and not being distracted by what’s going on behind you or to the sides. It’s letting whatever doesn’t help you move forward fall to the wayside.

Grit is making a mistake, learning what you can from it, and letting the rest slide off your back. It’s recognizing that you can get mad, but if that anger keeps you from pushing forward, you’ve got to let it go.

y y y miles away. It’s saying “Nothing is going to hold me back” and backing those words up with actions to match.

It’s easy to say “I won’t let anything stop me.” It’s much harder to actually stand by those words when life is trying to rub your nose in the dirt.

Grit isn’t about what you say. It’s about what you do.

Athlete’s Exercise:The number one indicator of success is whether or not you possess grit, but how do you know if you have it? Work through the questions below to learn more about your own level of grit.

1. Think of a time when you had to use grit and determination to get through something, and you succeeded. How did you feel?

2. Now think of time when you had to use grit and determination to get through something, but you failed anyway. How did you feel then? Did you just give up? Or did you pick yourself up and carry on?

3. Grit is a mindset. It’s believing that even if you fail, you can get back up and make sure that next time is different. But there are certain mindsets that can hold you back. What’s one self-defeating mindset you can change to up your grit level?

y y Were you surprised by your results? Did you agree or disagree with them? Why?

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F O R PA R E N T S

FOCUS FORWARD: FOR PARENTSSometimes it can feel like kids have absolutely zero ability to focus. Unless of course we’ve said “No” to something they want. When denied that new video game or a night at a friend’s house, their attention can become laser-focused on obtaining it anyway. Or at least complaining incessantly.

There’s a huge difference between tenacious whining and tenacious focus. For starters, one is annoying and the other is productive.

Still, both of these arise from a place of “want.” It’s easy to focus on video games or hanging out with friends because those things are fun, so kids want to do them. It’s hard to focus on acing that math test because fractions are generally boring, so it’s easy to say “I don’t want to”.

y y may not be fun, but we can demonstrate how it is useful to achieving some other goal that is fun.

y y don’t want to do leads to something they do want.

The jury is still out on what exactly causes some people to be more tenacious than others, but there are ways to begin instilling this tenacity and grit in our kids.

For one thing, we can celebrate those times when they fall down and get right back up. Too often we get caught up in the idea of celebrating success rather than the effort that led to it. Instead of telling our children we’re proud of the accomplishment, we can start telling them “I’m proud of how hard you worked.”

Tenacity stems from wants, but kids can be y y y

absolutely have to try out for baseball, and the next they want absolutely nothing to do with it because basketball or swimming or “insert activity here” sounds so much better.

Nobody wants to be the parent that “forces” their child to play the piano, or join the soccer team, or stay at summer camp when they’re begging to come home after two days. But when our children ask for something, whether it’s playing a sport or taking a dance class, we can set a certain amount of time that they have to stick to it, even if it’s hard or if they’ve changed their minds. Encouraging them to stick it out longer helps instill grit, and once the hard part is past, they might even thank us.


Use the questions below to start a discussion with your children about the importance of tenacity.

1. What accomplishment makes you most proud? Was it something you achieved with little effort or was it an uphill climb? How do you think the amount of effort you had to put into it affected how you feel about the accomplishment now?

e me e e e e but you kept going anyway. What kept you moving forward despite setbacks? And how did you feel after you made it past the frustrating circumstances?3. What’s a hard thing that each family member can do this week? Everyone chooses one activity that sounds fun but challenging, and that needs to be done daily for the entire week. Check each other’s progress regularly.

e e e e ee e experience made you feel.

e e me ee e me e m member can help the others avoid these distractions?

e m Brainstorm some ways to make it fun. If you really come up empty on that, think of ways that taking care of this boring activity will lead to something fun.

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Guide your athletes to see themselves the

way you do.

Build a strong foundation by

building a strong character.

Understand that your reputation is not your character.

Offer guideposts for your child’s

journey to adulthood.

CLARK KENT “Be more concerned with your character than your reputation. Because your character is what you really are.” John Wooden

Superheroes often wear disguises to hide their identities from the world. One of the most famous examples is Superman’s disguise as Clark Kent, but we can all think of plenty of

others.

In a similar way, we wear disguises everyday based on where we are or who we’re with. These disguises are natural, but they’re also a defense mechanism. We wear them because we’re afraid that if we show people who we really are, we might be rejected or ridiculed.

These disguises form the basis of our reputations, and they can become so integral to our self-image that we might even forget sometimes that we’re wearing a disguise.

But, we have to try to remember that we are not our disguise, or our reputation. Instead, we are our character. Reputations are changeable, and they’re based on other people’s perceptions. Character is a lot harder to alter, and it’s based on the reality of who we are, whether other people see it or not.

Focusing on our reputation and thinking that is our real self is like Superman believing he is actually Clark Kent. It sounds absurd, right? If Superman actually believed he was Clark Kent instead of the other way around, he

y y y

When we forget our character and our core values, we’re doing the same thing. It’s easy to let our identity get wrapped up in what other people see, but someone else’s perceptions are never going to help us answer the question “Who am I?” in a useful way. It will just bog us down.

If we show the world Clark Kent, and then we believe them when they tell us that’s who we are, we’re going to be really awful superheroes.

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F O R C O A C H E S

CLARK KENT: FOR COACHESOur students all come from different backgrounds, and they all have different mindsets. The messages

y y y because they’re still growing, they tend to internalize pieces from all of these different messages.

y like grit, motivation, and integrity. Understanding where each athlete is coming from and how they think can make things easier, but reaching that understanding is a massive undertaking of its own.

Part of the joy and struggle of teaching these students lies in the fact that they are still in the process of becoming adults. This is great because it means we get the opportunity to help guide and shape them. It also

y y y y

Before we can really help them reach their full potential, we have to realize that our athletes don’t necessarily see themselves the way that we do. While we recognize their potential and try to help them fully realize it, they may not even recognize that the potential is there to begin with.

y y behavior based on their current setting. Our best player might be a teacher’s worst nightmare in the classroom. We know that the holy terror version of himself isn’t the real student, but if he continues to compartmentalize the different roles he plays in his life, he might not see that.

Part of our job is helping our athletes see that the roles they play and masks they wear are not who they really are and that those masks aren’t necessary. We want them to realize that even though they might start to believe they’re Clark Kent, they’re actually Superman (or Superwoman).

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. An opportunity to compliment the strong traits you see in a player. This could be something you ee e e e e e e e e e m e ve e e e

e e e mm e m e me me ve m

2. An opportunity to learn about your athletes’ backgrounds/mindsets. e ve

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3. An opportunity to call out differing behavior. e e e ve e e e e e e e m e

e ve e e e v e e e e e

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:“Winning takes talent. To repeat takes character.” - John Wooden

TUESDAY:

the ceiling.” - Bill Belichick

WEDNESDAY:“Show class, have pride, and display character. If you do, winning takes care of itself.” - Bear Bryant

THURSDAY:“Leadership is a potent combination of strategy and character. But if you must be without one, be without the strategy.” - Norman Schwarzkopf

FRIDAY:“Reputation is what others think about you. What’s far more important is character because that is what you think about yourself.” - Billie Jean King

CLARK KENT


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CLARK KENT: FOR CAPTAINS“Leadership is a potent combination of strategy and character. But if you must be without one, be without the strategy.” Norman Schwarzkopf

The best strategy in the world would be useless in the wrong hands because a strategy is only as good as the character of the person who executes it. Your character is the foundation that everything you do stands on.

Think about it this way: a $1,000,000 house sounds pretty great, right? But what if that house is

the house will just tumble down.

People like to focus on the house, the strategy, because that’s the thing everyone else can see. Your foundation, your character, is less likely to be noticed unless it’s faulty, but it’s far more important.

Think about Superman. He’s one of the leaders of the Justice League not just because he’s strong and nearly unkillable, but also because he has a strong value system and desire to help people even if he gets hurt in the process.

As a leader, you want your character to set you apart in the same way. It’s not about being “better” than everyone else or morally superior, though. Character is a very personal thing that may or may not shine through in day-to-day life due to the masks we all tend to wear.

y y rock and a hard place, your character

y situation. It’s your moral compass, your sense of right and wrong. The strength or weakness of your

y is built on a strong foundation or one that will crumble under the slightest pressure.

On the strong side it’s composed of integrity, motivation, ambition, patience, and so many other things. But, every strength has a correlative weakness: deception, laziness, ambivalence, impatience, etc. How strong is your foundation?

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m v e e e

e m e e e e

e e e e e e e

CLARK KENT


17W E E K


CLARK KENT: FOR ATHLETESThe way you behave throughout the day shifts based on who you are with. Your friends might know you as the comedian while your parents see you as the shy one. Your coach might know you as an offensive powerhouse while the girl or guy you’re crushing on sees you as an awkward classmate.

You spend a lot of time grooming your appearance and behavior based on what you think the people around you want you to be. You wear different masks for different situations because you care how other people perceive you. Even being the person who “doesn’t care what others think” is a mask. Everyone cares to some extent; it’s human nature.

Your self-image is so wrapped up in your outer image that it’s easy to forget that it isn’t who you really are. That’s just your reputation. Your reputation is not your real character.

But, just as Superman isn’t really Clark Kent, you aren’t really the class clown, or the nerd, or the powerhouse. Who you really are is more personal and more complex than that.

Who you really are determines how you will react in tough situations. Think about it in terms of your sport. Everybody wants to be known as “the team no one wants to play.” Everybody wants the reputation for being “the team.” But, your character is what it takes to actually make that reality.

When you have to choose between hanging out with friend late or having the energy to make an y y y

When you start struggling in class mid-season and you have to pick up the grades or sit on the bench, do you have the motivation to re-prioritize and get things done?

Motivation and discipline are strong character traits. These traits and others like them have the potential to affect your reputation, but they can be faked, at least for a while. Do you exhibit those traits even when no one is looking? Because that is the mark of who you really are.

Athlete’s Exercise:

1. How would your friends describe you? Your parents? Your teammates? What about your actions causes these different descriptions?

2. How would you describe yourself the way you are when no one else is around (your character)? Would it bother you if other people saw you that way, too?

y y y y answer you just gave?

4. What does it mean to you to have a strong character?

CLARK KENT


17W E E K

F O R PA R E N T S

CLARK KENT: FOR PARENTSDespite what our kids might think, we do remember the days when we were their age. The reason it’s hard for them to believe it is because being a teenager today just isn’t the same as being a teenager back when we were growing up. Our kids are dealing with different issues and a different environment.

That said, we can still draw parallels. The exact circumstances aren’t the same because society isn’t the same, but there will always be similarities.

For instance, the subject matter in schools has changed a lot, but the consequences for struggling at school haven’t. On the plus side, the ways to help struggling students aren’t all that different, either. The tutors might be more likely to be virtual now, but they still exist.

The social hierarchy at school may not be the same as when we were their age, but there’s a good chance that y

to worry about seeing the “perfect” student we were envious of posted all over Instagram or Twitter as well as walking by in the hallways, but it’s a safe bet that we still remember the envy and how that made us feel.

Adolescence is kind of like a treasure hunt where our kids don’t have a treasure map. They don’t even really know what the treasure is that they’re looking for, but every day they go out and search for it anyway.

That search is important for development. It’s y y

the journey to adulthood because the journey itself is where growth happens.

Sometimes we wish we could hand them a map to make it easier because some of the bumps and dead ends they run into on the way can be scary for them and us. But, we don’t have a map to give because their journey won’t look exactly like ours did. The landscape has changed and the tools to help reach the destination have progressed.

Still, we can put up guideposts, paint some boundary lines, or hand them a book of traveller’s tips. Things have changed a lot since we were their age, but not so much that we can’t recognize the rough outline of the path to growing up.


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CLARK KENT


18W E E K


Remind yourself (and your team) why you

all show up every day.

Identify the elements of

your struggle so y

solution.

Accept that there is no shame in the

struggle.

Practice keeping communication open to show

your kids that you support them.

GUARANTEED STRUGGLE“Struggle is guaranteed; success is optional.” Coach Mackey

Struggle shows up in every area of our life at some point. Struggle can be having a hard time learning a new subject or having to push yourself to the edge of

But if you didn’t struggle, how would you ever learn? And if you didn’t learn, how would you ever improve?

We can’t control whether or not we are going to struggle. That’s one of life’s guarantees, and we can’t escape it. What we can control is how we deal with that struggle. We can try to run away from it, but in the end, that’s only going to prolong the pain of struggle. It’s already hard enough, so why would we want to drag it out?

Doesn’t that sound exhausting? Worse, when we’re too exhausted from running away, we lack the

The other way to deal with struggle is to take a cue from the buffalo. When a storm is coming, the y y y y

lightning because they understand that is the quickest way to come out the other side.

If we run towards the storm and we embrace the struggle, we can surmount the issue much quicker. We can also use it to learn and get stronger.


Guaranteed Struggle


18W E E K

F O R C O A C H E S

GUARANTEED STRUGGLE: FOR COACHESStruggles can make us and our athletes stronger, but they can also suck the life out of a program. The difference between being a good coach and being great coach is how we handle the struggle.

y y workout or eat healthy. We put a plan in place. We stick to that plan, and we feel awesome. Then a few days, or maybe weeks go by, and it starts to wear on us. It gets harder and harder to maintain that initial momentum. We start to wear under the pressure

y golden. Players are fresh and ready to roll. This is going to be the best season ever. Then, the struggle starts to really kick in. Practice is hard. Games are hard. Everything is hard. We know that it’s worth it, but the level of willpower required to keep moving just keeps growing.

y y

how to properly spend our willpower--and that of our athletes--so it lasts the whole season.

THIS WEEK, BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR 1. An opportunity to do something fun at practice. Practice doesn’t always have to be serious. Find a way to work something fun into the daily grind. It could be something as simple as a game of tag. Maybe that sounds too juvenile, but no teenager is too old or jaded for fun even if they do want to pretend they’re too cool for it. If that’s not your

me e e e e e e sports. Check out the More Resources page for some

e e m e

2. An opportunity for a team-building activity. This could be something like a movie night, playing some

me v e me e e have to be related to practice or the game because

m e e e e connect off the court, so they work better together on the court.

3. An opportunity to talk about commitment. Sometimes we need to remind our players and ourselves why we do this. Get the team together and e e mm e team. Have the coaching staff share some of their reasons for showing up each day. Maybe even open it up to the players to share why they are present. This helps keep the goal in sight and remind everyone e e e

QUOTES OF THE DAY:MONDAY:

y y y

TUESDAY:“Imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we’re all in this together.” - Brené Brown

WEDNESDAY:“If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” - Frederick Douglass

THURSDAY:“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” - Arnold Schwarzenegger

FRIDAY:“Gold medals aren’t really made of gold. They’re made of sweat, determination, and a

y

Guaranteed Struggle


18W E E K


GUARANTEED STRUGGLE: FOR CAPTAINS y y

you and your team are facing, it might look like Mount Everest and feel like you’re climbing without supplies. However, if you break down the problem into smaller pieces, you might realize that you’re actually strolling through foothills with a picnic basket.

There are three main factors in a struggle: the circumstances, the pain point, and the goal. The circumstance is what is happening. The pain point is what makes it hard. The goal is what this struggle is moving you towards.

Now, there might be multiple pain points. For instance, if the circumstance of your struggle is chemistry class, one pain point might be that the subject is boring so it’s hard to pay attention, and another might be that it’s a morning class so you’re not very awake for it anyway.

y y y

Is it the circumstance itself? In that case, the problem is your mindset more than the actual situation. If you can’t even get past the idea of what is happening enough to face it, then you’re just running away from the storm. If you just keep focusing on the fact that you don’t want to take chemistry because you think it’s stupid or it’s something you’ll never use, you’ve failed before you even started.

Is one or more of the pain points driving the bus? If you’re too focused on how much it hurts, you’re going to veer off course. If you’re too busy worrying about how much you hate getting up in the morning to pay attention in chemistry, you’re focusing on something you can’t change. The class is going to be at the same time each day whether you like it or not. So if that’s your focus, the struggle is just going to stagnate, and you’re going to

Is it the goal? This is what you want in the driver’s seat. You want the ultimate goal to be front and center so you don’t get off track. If you can pull your focus to the fact that you want to pass this chemistry class, and focus on

y mitigate the pain points so they aren’t pulling you back as much.

C


e e m e e e eme e

m e e m m

e e e rather still be in bed.

e e e e e tired from morning practice and being in school all day.

e m e m e e e games.

Now, write out a couple of your current struggles. What are the pain points? What’s the goal? How can you focus on the goal to make it so those pain points aren’t as big a deal?

Guaranteed Struggle


18W E E K


GUARANTEED STRUGGLE: FOR ATHLETESYou will encounter people in your life who never seem to struggle at anything. Maybe they’re just naturally good at school or good at throwing accurately. To the outside observer, it looks like they don’t have any worries because everything comes to them easily.

That is an illusion. Their struggles might not be obvious to others, but you can bet that they exist. Maybe that person struggles with self-esteem issues or social anxiety. Maybe they

y may look to you, know that they are dealing with their own tough situations, too.

y struggles, they can also make you a powerhouse in both arenas. Strength comes from struggle. Whether you’re lifting weights or running long distances, working out is hard. It requires both physical and mental determination to keep going and push through the discomfort to reap the results.

y

ideal.

Sometimes it might feel like you are the only person who ever has, or ever will, struggle with your particular issue. But that’s not true. When you feel alone in your struggle, it can be hard to imagine other people facing the issues that you do, so let’s put some real numbers to some situations that you or people you know may be facing.

• 40% of kids in America are being raised by a single mother. Think about a basketball team, there are 5 guys or girls on the court at a time; according to that statistic, 2 of those players would be raised by just their mom.

• At least 12.5% of teens age 12-17 will suffer a major depressive episode in a year. That means if you look at a group of 8 friends at school, at least 1 of them would be struggling with major depression. That doesn’t even include less severe--but still very relevant-- depression or other emotional struggles.

• In 2015, 28% of high school seniors had reading skills below their grade level. If you y y

struggling with reading.

The struggle to overcome obstacles is what makes you strong. There is no shame in it. And you are not alone.

Guaranteed Struggle


18W E E K

F O R PA R E N T S

GUARANTEED STRUGGLE: FOR PARENTSDespite what our kids might think, we do remember the days when we were their age. The reason it’s hard for them to believe it is because being a teenager today just isn’t the same as being a teenager back when we were growing up. Our kids are dealing with different issues and a different environment.

That said, we can still draw parallels. The exact circumstances aren’t the same because society isn’t the same, but there will always be similarities.

For instance, the subject matter in schools has changed a lot, but the consequences for struggling at school haven’t. On the plus side, the ways to help struggling students aren’t all that different, either. The tutors might be more likely to be virtual now, but they still exist.

The social hierarchy at school may not be the same as when we were their age, but there’s a good chance that y

to worry about seeing the “perfect” student we were envious of posted all over Instagram or Twitter as well as walking by in the hallways, but it’s a safe bet that we still remember the envy and how that made us feel.

Adolescence is kind of like a treasure hunt where our kids don’t have a treasure map. They don’t even really know what the treasure is that they’re looking for, but every day they go out and search for it anyway.

That search is important for development. It’s y y

the journey to adulthood because the journey itself is where growth happens.

Sometimes we wish we could hand them a map to make it easier because some of the bumps and dead ends they run into on the way can be scary for them and us. But, we don’t have a map to give because their journey won’t look exactly like ours did. The landscape has changed and the tools to help reach the destination have progressed.

Still, we can put up guideposts, paint some boundary lines, or hand them a book of traveller’s tips. Things have changed a lot since we were their age, but not so much that we can’t recognize the rough outline of the path to growing up.


Our kids might not realize we do remember being teens because our stories tend to be the rough equivalent of “back in my day.” Instead of focusing on how much everything has changed, it might be more helpful to focus on what hasn’t changed.

1. What are some of your child’s struggles that remind you of tough times when you were their age?

2. What do you think is the biggest difference between growing up when you were a kid and growing up today? How might it actually be similar?

3. What is the most important lesson you learned growing up and how did you learn it? How could you re-write that episode of your life in a modern setting?

4. What’s a life tip or piece of advice that someone gave you when you were growing up? Maybe it was something your parents told you that they learned as teens, and it was relevant to you. How is it still relevant today?

5. If you were a teenager again today, how do you think e e e e m ee

would help you?

Guaranteed Struggle

2 W o r d s C h a r a c t e r D e v e l o p m e n t • S e a s o n 1 • M o r e R e s o u r c e s • P a g e 1

MORE RESOURCES01S E A S O N

EXTRA CONTENT & INFORMATION

WEEK 1: HIGHER STANDARDSPodcast: Unbeatable Mind Podcast with Mark Divine, Captain Bob Shoultz, A Personal Ethoshttps://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-unbeatable-mind-podcast-with-mark-divine/id955637330?mt=2&i=1000333272824

Video: No More Excuses Motivational Video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Soj7RXjYWE4

Video: Raise Your Standards & Change Your Rituals, *Warning Language* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yl1VXOC3tZU

Video and Article: Brendon Burchard, How to Raise Your Standards http://brendonburchard.tumblr.com/%20post/129751886073/how-to-raise-your-standards

WEEK 2: SACRIFICE REQUIRED

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2U4uFyhdkI

Article: 8 Things Successful People Sacri ce for Their Success, Thuy Yau https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/8-things-successful-people-sacrifice-for-their-success.html

. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTnqgQRATbI

https://belimitless.com/start-day-right-gurbaksh-chahal/

WEEK 3: MOST VALUABLEARTICLE: 9 Valuable Principles That Will Make You Treat People Better, Lolly Daskalhttps://www.inc.com/lolly-daskal/9-important-ways-that-will-make-you-treat-people-better.html

Article: Seven Ways to Show the People You Lead That You Value Them, Doug Fields https://homeword.com/articles/seven-ways-to-show-the-people-you-lead-that-you-value-them/#.Wwcp_lMvyMJ

. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTnqgQRATbI

Article: Create Success by Creating Value for Othershttp://withivan.com/blog/creating-value-for-others/

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-unbeatable-mind-podcast-with-mark-divine/id955637330?mt=2&i=1000333272824


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Soj7RXjYWE4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yl1VXOC3tZU

http://brendonburchard.tumblr.com/%20post/129751886073/how-to-raise-your-standards

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2U4uFyhdkI

https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/8-things-successful-people-sacrifice-for-their-success.html

https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/8-things-successful-people-sacrifice-for-their-success.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTnqgQRATbI

https://belimitless.com/start-day-right-gurbaksh-chahal/

https://www.inc.com/lolly-daskal/9-important-ways-that-will-make-you-treat-people-better.html

https://homeword.com/articles/seven-ways-to-show-the-people-you-lead-that-you-value-them/#.Wwcp_lMvyMJ

https://homeword.com/articles/seven-ways-to-show-the-people-you-lead-that-you-value-them/#.Wwcp_lMvyMJ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTnqgQRATbI

http://withivan.com/blog/creating-value-for-others/




WEEK 4: R FACTORAdditional Resource: Google search: “E+R=O Brian Kight”

Video: No More Excuses Motivational Video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Soj7RXjYWE4

Article: Turn Your Challenges into Opportunitieshttps://www.fastcompany.com/3033550/how-top-executives-turn-problems-into-opportunities-and-you-can-too

Article: How Successful People Stay Calm, Travis Bradberry https://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2014/02/06/how-successful-people-stay-calm/#31ffc9a32f79

WEEK 5: KNOCK KNOCKVideo: How To Create Opportunity in Your Life For Long Term Success | SSP, Alexander Ouellethttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sA3_uNoLRVQ

Article: 7 Ways to Create an Opportunity Rich Life, Davis Nguyenhttp://www.davisnguyen.com/create-opportunities/

Video: Creating Opportunities | Think Out Loud With Jay Shettyhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjOf-EDoC8o

WEEK 6: MOST VALUABLEVideo/Speech: The Man in the Arena, Theodore Roosevelthttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3sH_8nw2uM

https://www.ted.com/talks/angela_lee_duckworth_grit_the_power_of_passion_and_perseverance

Podcast: Unbeatable Mind Podcast with Mark Divine, Dean Karnazes on Ultra-endurance and determinationhttps://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-unbeatable-mind-podcast-with-mark-divine/id955637330?mt=2&i=1000390828514

BOOKS:The Blessing of a B:https://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/10/12/the-blessings-of-a-b-minus/

The Blessing Of a Skinned Knee


https://www.fastcompany.com/3033550/how-top-executives-turn-problems-into-opportunities-and-you-can-too

https://www.fastcompany.com/3033550/how-top-executives-turn-problems-into-opportunities-and-you-can-too

https://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2014/02/06/how-successful-people-stay-calm/#31ffc9a32f79

https://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2014/02/06/how-successful-people-stay-calm/#31ffc9a32f79

http://brendonburchard.tumblr.com/%20post/129751886073/how-to-raise-your-standards

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sA3_uNoLRVQ

http://www.davisnguyen.com/create-opportunities/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjOf-EDoC8o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3sH_8nw2uM




https://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/10/12/the-blessings-of-a-b-minus/




WEEK 7: WHAT IF?Video: Ask Why Not? Motivation Video, Jom Rohn https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUEXOS8nEZ0Video: I can do It, Eric Thomas & Les Brown https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmfX7N_o4-0

. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5bPontivJE

WEEK 8: NO EXCUSESList of Expensive Phrases: • I can’t -- I choose to • I have to -- I get to • He/she made me -- I have chosen to accept the responsibility • I don’t have time -- It’s not a priority to me right now

Episode 2 of the the PlusOne Podcast:www.PlusOnepod.com

Video: No More Excuses Motivational Videohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Soj7RXjYWE4

. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsSC2vx7zFQ

WEEK 9: FIVE P’sArticle: Stop Wasting Your Time, Tony Robbins Teamhttps://www.tonyrobbins.com/productivity-performance/stop-wasting-your-time/

Additional Resources: Time Tracking AppToggl: www.toggl.com

Additional Resources: 24 Hour Calendar Templatehttps://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/76/75/5e/76755e582e8e8451bbf0bef4e755c8f6.jpg

Video: Tony Robbins’ 10-Minute Morning Ritualhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgnu9mapQiQ

Video: Ray Allen Preparation Motivationhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7KGG681Cd0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUEXOS8nEZ0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmfX7N_o4-0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5bPontivJE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sA3_uNoLRVQ

www.PlusOnepod.com


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsSC2vx7zFQ

https://www.tonyrobbins.com/productivity-performance/stop-wasting-your-time/

www.toggl.com

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/76/75/5e/76755e582e8e8451bbf0bef4e755c8f6.jpg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgnu9mapQiQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7KGG681Cd0




WEEK 10: EIGHTEEN INCHESVideo: Steve Jobs’ Vision For The Worldhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvEiSa6_EPA

Video: Change your Mindset and Achieve Anything, Colin O’Brady https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vo_lZiytsMw

Video: Tim Kight Focus 3 Key Notehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ySQ1UAtWTg

Video: Ray Lewis Motivational Speech to Hurricanes Playershttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QO-XM4JMeAI

WEEK 11: ONE THING 2 1 .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxBQLFLei70

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ma6OjSsobko

Video: What’s Your Why? Eric Thomashttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XIGu3Kxg2I

WEEK 12: PURPOSED PAIN 1

*Warning Language*

Video: It’s Not About Where You Start, Coach Mackey https://twitter.com/MackeySpeaks/status/899595376340193280

https://twitter.com/TBrianKight/status/894734104121430016

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvEiSa6_EPA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vo_lZiytsMw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ySQ1UAtWTg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QO-XM4JMeAI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxBQLFLei70

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ma6OjSsobko

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XIGu3Kxg2I

www.Netflix.com

https://twitter.com/MackeySpeaks/status/899595376340193280

https://twitter.com/TBrianKight/status/894734104121430016




WEEK 13: OWN ITArticle: The Theory of the 3 Whys, Jason Zookhttps://www.inc.com/jason-surfrapp/the-theory-of-the-3-whys.html

Video: Make Your Next Mistake Your Best Mistake, Coach Mackeyhttps://vimeo.com/233317282/2231e4a43e

Podcast: Making Mistakes, NPR’s Radio Hourhttp://www.npr.org/2013/03/11/174030515/making-mistakes

WEEK 14: WHAT IF? 1

https://hbr.org/2015/10/how-1-performance-improvements-led-to-olympic-gold

Additional Resource: 168 Hour Worksheet, 2Words Character Development

Additional Resource: How to Manage Your Time Effectively, University of Kenthttps://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/sk/time.htm

Video: Jump Shot: The Kenny Sailors Sailors Storyhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qn97lFk7Nuw

WEEK 15: OVERNIGHT SUCCESSArticle: Picasso’s Napkin: The Myth of the Overnight Successhttps://betterhumans.coach.me/picassos-napkin-the-myth-of-the-overnight-success-d838e8dcdfd8

https://creativemornings.com/talks/seth-godin/4

1 www.plusonepod.com

https://www.inc.com/jason-surfrapp/the-theory-of-the-3-whys.html

https://vimeo.com/233317282/2231e4a43e

http://www.npr.org/2013/03/11/174030515/making-mistakes

https://hbr.org/2015/10/how-1-performance-improvements-led-to-olympic-gold

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0Bz4b7D8NcgjvNnhHM09fOGZLa1k/view?usp=sharing

https://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/sk/time.htm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qn97lFk7Nuw

https://betterhumans.coach.me/picassos-napkin-the-myth-of-the-overnight-success-d838e8dcdfd8

https://creativemornings.com/talks/seth-godin/4

www.plusonepod.com




WEEK 16: FOCUS FORWARD


Article: Burn the Ships, Travis Robertsonhttp://travisrobertson.com/leadership/burn-ships-succeed-die

https://angeladuckworth.com/grit-scale/

https://angeladuckworth.com/grit-book/

WEEK 17: CLARK KENTAdditional Resource: John Wooden’s Pyramid of Successhttp://www.coachwooden.com/pyramid-of-success

teen’s shifting identityhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-in-between/201710/the-masks-we-wear

WEEK 18: GUARANTEED STRUGGLEArticle: Be the Buffalo, Rory Vadenhttp://roryvaden.com/blog/be-the-buffalo-the-mentality-of-how-ultra-performers-respond-to-challenges/

Podcast: When Willpower isn’t Enough, Freakonomicshttp://freakonomics.com/podcast/when-willpower-isnt-enough-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/

Additional Resources:Team-building; football drills Livestrong; baseball drills, Helpful Baseball Drills; soccer drills, Soccer Coach Weekly; volleyball drills, Livestrong; basketball drills, Livestrong


http://travisrobertson.com/leadership/burn-ships-succeed-die

https://angeladuckworth.com/grit-scale/

https://angeladuckworth.com/grit-book/

http://www.coachwooden.com/pyramid-of-success

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-in-between/201710/the-masks-we-wear

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/marjorie-clifton/grace-under-pressure_b_4065380.html

http://roryvaden.com/blog/be-the-buffalo-the-mentality-of-how-ultra-performers-respond-to-challenges/

http://freakonomics.com/podcast/when-willpower-isnt-enough-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/

http://freakonomics.com/podcast/when-willpower-isnt-enough-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/

season-1-weeks-1-18-master-workbook.pdf - 2 words

Documents