cub scout campfire compilation - scouts...
TRANSCRIPT
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Cub Scout Campfire Compilation
Songs, Stories & Cheers
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Contents
CAMPFIRE SONGS ............................................................ 5
1. AIN'T NO BUGS ON ME SONG .................................. 5
2. AIN'T THAT FUNKY NOW ......................................... 6
3. ALBERTA BOUND ............................................... 7
4. ANIMAL SONG ......................................................... 8
5. AND THE GREEN GRASS GREW ALL AROUND .......... 8
6. BEAR SONG: I MET A BEAR ...................................... 8
7. BARRETT’S PRIVATEERS ........................................... 9
8. BILL GROGAN’S GOAT ............................................ 10
9. BINGO .................................................................... 10
10. BLUE JAY .............................................................. 10
11. BOOGIE WOOGIE WASHER WOMAN .................. 11
12. BOOM CHICKA BOOM ......................................... 11
13. BREAKFAST .......................................................... 12
14. CANNIBAL KING ................................................... 12
15. COMING OF THE FROGS ...................................... 13
16. CUDDLY KOALAS .................................................. 13
17. DEAD DOG ROVER ............................................... 13
18. DECK THE HALLS .................................................. 14
19. DON’T WEAR NO SOCKS SONG ........................... 14
20. DOWN BY THE BAY .............................................. 15
21. DO YOUR EARS HANG LOW ................................. 15
22. FAREWELL TO NOVA SCOTIA ............................... 15
23. FIRE’S BURNING (CAMPFIRE) .............................. 16
24. FRUIT SALAD ........................................................ 16
25. FRANKENSTEIN SONG .......................................... 16
26. GA GOO ............................................................... 16
27. GOOD KING WENCES ........................................... 17
28. GOOD OLE HOCKEY GAME .................................. 17
29. GING GANG GOOLI .............................................. 17
30. GOING ON A LION HUNT ..................................... 17
31. GRANNY'S IN THE CELLAR SONG ......................... 18
32. GRIMY GREASY GOPHER GUTS ............................ 18
33. GOTTA BOOGA .................................................... 19
34. HAGALEENA HAGALEENA MAGALEENA .............. 19
35. HEAD, SHOULDERS, KNEES AND TOES ................. 20
36. HERMAN THE WORM'N ....................................... 20
37. HE'S GOT THE WHOLE WORLD ............................ 20
38. THE HIPPOPOTAMUS SONG ................................ 20
39. HOLE IN THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA ..................... 21
40. HOKEY POKEY ...................................................... 21
41. I KNOW AN OLD LADY ......................................... 21
42. I MET A BEAR ....................................................... 21
43. IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT ................. 22
44. IF YOU’RE LOST AND YOU KNOW IT .................... 22
45. I'VE GOT A HEAD LIKE A PING PONG BALL .......... 23
46. IT’S A SMALL WORLD ........................................... 23
47. I’VE BEEN WORKING ON THE RAILROAD ............. 23
48. JUNGLE BOOK RAP ............................................... 23
49. KING OF CARACTACUS ......................................... 24
50. KUM BY YAH ........................................................ 24
51. LAND OF THE SILVER BIRCH ................................. 24
52. THE LITTLEST WORM ........................................... 24
53. I WANT TO LINGER .............................................. 25
54. MOOSE SONG ...................................................... 25
55. MOUNTAIN DEW SONG ....................................... 25
56. MRS. O'LEARY'S COW (OLD MOTHER LEARY) ...... 27
57. MY BONNIE .......................................................... 27
58. MY MOMMA DON'T WEAR NO SOCKS ................ 28
59. MY STOMACH HAS HAD IT! ................................. 28
60. MY TURKEY .......................................................... 29
61. NOBODY LIKES ME ............................................... 29
62. ON TOP OF SPAGHETTI ........................................ 30
63. PAW PAW PATCH ................................................ 30
64. PINK PAJAMAS ..................................................... 30
65. PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON ................................. 30
66. PURPLE STEW ...................................................... 31
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67. QUARTERMASTER’S STORE ................................. 31
68. RAVIOLI ................................................................ 31
69. THE ROOSTER SONG ............................................ 32
70. ROW, ROW, ROW YOUR BOAT ............................ 32
71. SAM SAM THE LAVATORY MAN .......................... 32
72. SAY WHY .............................................................. 32
73. SHABOOM SHABOOM ......................................... 32
74. SHAKE ANOTHER HAND ....................................... 33
75. SHAVING CREAM SONG ....................................... 33
76. SINGING IN THE RAIN .......................................... 33
77. THE SLAVES OF JOB ............................................. 33
78. SLEEPY SCOUTER ................................................. 34
79. TARZAN ................................................................ 34
80. THE GRAND OLD DUKE OF YORK ......................... 34
81. THE BEAR WENT OVER THE MOUNTAIN ............. 34
82. THE MORE WE SHARE TOGETHER ....................... 35
83. THE PRINCESS PAT ............................................... 35
84. THE SECOND STORY WINDOW ............................ 35
85. THE TWELVE DAYS OF CAMP ............................... 35
86. THE WOLVES WENT HUNTING ............................ 36
87. THIS OLD MAN ..................................................... 36
88. THERE AIN'T NO FLIES ON US .............................. 36
89. THERE WAS AN OLD LADY ................................... 36
90. THERE’S A HOLE IN MY BUCKET .......................... 37
91. THIS LAND IS YOUR LAND .................................... 37
92. THREE BLACK BUZZARDS ..................................... 37
93. TIE ME KANGAROO DOWN SPORT ...................... 38
94. TOM THE TOAD ................................................... 38
95. WALDIEOTCHA .................................................... 39
96. WALTZING MATILDA ........................................... 39
97. WE'RE AT CAMP .................................................. 40
98. WORM SONG ....................................................... 40
99. YOGI BEAR ........................................................... 40
CAMPFIRE STORIES ........................................................ 41
1. BRICKLAYERS ACCIDENT REPORT STORY .............. 41
2. 'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, ................ 41
3. PURPLE GORILLA STORY ........................................ 42
4. GLOOP MAKER STORY ........................................... 44
5. DARK SUCKERS STORY .......................................... 45
6. THE MEDICRIN STORY ............................................ 45
7. THE MOST POPULAR MAN STORY ........................ 47
8. CREMATION OF SAM MCGEE STORY ..................... 47
9. GHOST TRAIN ......................................................... 49
10. VINDER VIPER STORY ........................................... 49
11. SOME SPECIAL PIG STORY .................................. 50
12. BALLAD OF JOHNNY O'DELL ................................ 50
13. SHAGGY DOG STORY ........................................... 51
14. THE EMERALD RING (SCARY STORY) ................... 52
15. GHOST WITH ONE BLACK EYE STORY .................. 53
16. NAIL IN THE ATTIC STORY .................................... 54
17. RED SLOPPITY LIPS ............................................... 54
18. JOB AT THE ZOO .................................................. 55
19. BLOODY FINGER .................................................. 56
20. FARMER JONES AND THE BIG QUAKE ................. 56
21. A HOUSE OF TERROR ........................................... 57
22. 10 HOLES ............................................................. 58
23. GIRL AT THE UNDERPASS .................................... 59
24. ON WASHINGTON ROCK ..................................... 59
25. LA MALA HORA .................................................... 60
26. ABIYOYO .............................................................. 61
27. AKKI TAKKI TONGA .............................................. 62
CAMPFIRE CHEERS ........................................................ 64
SCOUT CAMP GRACES ................................................... 69
1. ALPHABET GRACE .................................................. 69
2. JOHNNY APPLESEED ............................................... 69
3. SUPERMAN ............................................................ 69
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4. FLINTSTONES ......................................................... 69
5. ADDAMS FAMILY ................................................... 69
6. EDELWEISS ............................................................. 69
7. ZIPADEE DO DA ...................................................... 69
8. WE WILL ROCK YOU ............................................... 69
SCOUT TABLE GAMES .................................................... 70
1. TELEPHONE GAME ................................................. 70
2. DUCK GAME ........................................................... 70
3. SHOW US HOW TO GET DOWN! ............................ 70
4. TABLE GAME .......................................................... 70
5. LLAMA MAMA ....................................................... 70
6. STRONG & ABLE ..................................................... 70
SCOUT VESPERS ............................................................. 71
ANNOUNCEMENTS ........................................................ 73
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Campfire Songs
1. Ain't No Bugs on Me Song
(Tune: Ain’t gonna rain no more): http://www.songsforteaching.com/folk/ohitaintgonnarainnomorenomore.htm Oh, there ain't no bugs on me, on me. There ain't no bugs on me There may be bugs on some of you mugs But there ain't no bugs on me. Oh there ain't no flies on me, on me. There ain't no flies on me. There may be flies on some of you guys But there ain't no flies on me. Well, the Juney bug comes in the month of June The lightning bug comes in May Bed bug comes just any old time But, they're not going to stay Well, a bull frog sittin' on a lily pad Looking up at the sky The lily pad broke and the frog fell in He got water all in his eye. There ain't no frogs on us. There ain't no frogs on us. There might be frogs on some of you dogs, But there ain't no frogs on us. Mosquito he fly high Mosquito he fly low If old mosquito lands on me He ain't a gonna fly no mo' A peanut sittin' on a railroad track His heart was all a flutter Along come a choo-‐choo on the track Toot! Toot! Peanut butter! A cow walked on the railroad track, the train was coming fast. The train got off the railroad track to let the cow go past!
As I went walking through the woods Humming a tune so gaily The wind come whistling through the trees And froze my ukelele Oh there ain't no lobsters on me There, ain't no lobsters on me There may be lobsters On some of you mobsters But there ain't no lobsters on me. Oh it ain't gonna rain no more no more It ain't gonna rain no more How in the heck can I wash my neck When it ain't gonna rain no more? Well little bugs have littler bugs. Up on their backs to bite'em And the littler bugs have still littler bugs And so ad infinitum. We had a cat down on our farm It had a ball of yarn When those little cats were born They all had sweaters on She lay down by the sewer And by the sewer she died And at the coroner's inquest They called it sewer side We had a goat down on our farm It ate up old tin cans When those little goats were born They came in Ford sedans Some people say that fleas are black But I know that ain't so 'Cause Marry had a little lamb Whose fleece was white as snow Mary had a little lamb, so goes the tale of yore. She loved that little lamb so much, she passed the plate for more. I woke up in the morning, I glanced upon the wall. The roaches and the bedbugs were having a game of ball.
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The score was six to nothing, the roaches were ahead. A bedbug hit a home run and knocked me out of bed! The chamber maid came to my bed Get up you lazy sinner We need the sheets for table cloths And it's almost time for dinner Jack and Jill went up the hill To try out Jack's new flivver The car broke down a mile from town And dumped them in the river. A doctor fell into a well and broke his collar bone. We think that he should tend the sick and leave the well alone. A farmer slipped on the old barn roof when rotten boards gave way, And as as he fell, he shrugged and said, 'It's time to hit the hay.' Humpty Dumpty fell right down and landed on his head, So, all the horses and the menhad scrambled eggs and bread.
2. Ain't That Funky Now
This is popular, probably because its just so silly and scouts can easily create more verses. It's more of a chant than a song. On the ‘WHOA – ain’t that funky now” put on your James Brown impression!! Lyrics: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, All the king's horses and all of the king's men said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap]
Hickery dickery dock, the mouse ran up the clock, the clock struck one, and down he run and said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet eating her curds and whey When along came a spider and sat down beside her and said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Baa Baa Black sheep have you any wool, Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full, One for my master and one for the dame, And one for the little boy who said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring, he went to bed and bumped his head and said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] I'm a little tea pot short and stout, this is my handle and this is my spout, when you tip me over I will shout... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Yankee Doodle went to town a-‐ridin' on his pony, Stuck a feather in his hat and said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Old mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone, but when she got there, the cupboard was bare and she said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Eeny meeny miny moe, catch a tiger by the toe, if he hollers make him say... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap]
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All around the mulbery bush the monkey chased the weasle, The monkey thought it was all in fun, and said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater had a wife and couldn't keep her, Put her in a pumpkin shell and she said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] This little piggy went to market, This little piggy stayed home. This little piggy had roast beef, And this little piggy had none. And this little piggy said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the water. The itsy bitsy spider said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Rub-‐a-‐dub-‐dub-‐dub three men in a tub,... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Ole King Kole was a merry old soul, And a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl, And he said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] There was an old woman who lived in a shoe, She has so many children, she said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Hey diddle diddle the cat and fiddle, The cow jumped over the moon. The little dog laughed to see such sport And cat said... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap]
Little boy blue come blow your horn, The sheeps in the meadow, the cows in the corn... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep And doesn't know where to fine them... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap] Mary had a little lamb, its fleece was white as snow, And everywhere that Mary went, the lamb was sure to go... WHOA, ain't that Funky now! [Clap, Clap]
3. Alberta Bound
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xK3kHHZLi38&feature=related Oh the prairie lights are burnin' bright The Chinook wind is a-‐movin' in Tomorrow night I'll be Alberta bound Though I've done the best I could My old luck ain't been so good and Tomorrow night I'll be Alberta bound No one-‐eyed man could e'er forget The Rocky Mountain sunset It's a pleasure just to be Alberta bound I long to see my next of kin To know what kind of shape they're in Tomorrow night I'll be Alberta bound Alberta bound, Alberta bound It's good to be Alberta bound Alberta bound, Alberta bound It's good to be Alberta bound Oh the skyline of Toronto Is somethin' you'll get onto But they say you've got to live there for a while And if you got the money You can get yourself a honey A written guarantee ta make you smile But it's snowin' in the city And the streets and brown and gritty And I know there's pretty girls all over town But they never seem ta find me
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And the one I left behind me Is the reason that I'll be Alberta bound Alberta bound, Alberta bound It's good to be Alberta bound Alberta bound, Alberta bound It's good to be Alberta bound It's good to be Alberta bound
4. Animal Song
There was a …crocodile (chomping motion with arms) An orangutan (monkey action) A silvery fish (slithery fish motion with hand) And an eagle flying (flap arms) A rabbit (make rabbit ears) A beaver (make beaver teeth) A crazy elephant! (make elephant trunk with one arm swinging) Da na na na na, da na na na na! (swinging dancing action, snapping fingers) Repeat the song a number of times, taking out an animal each time till all you're left with are the actions!
5. And the Green Grass Grew All Around
(Repeat after me song) There was a tree, It was the prettiest tree, That you ever did see! Chorus (sung together) And the tree was in the ground, And the green grass grew all around, all around, and the green grass grew all around. And on that tree, There was a branch, It was the prettiest branch That you ever did see! Chorus (sung together) And the branch was on the tree, And the tree was in the ground, And the green grass grew all around, all around, and the green grass grew all around.
For the next verses, add on as follows: there was a twig there was a leaf there was a nest there was an egg there was a bird there was a wing there was a feather there was a flea there was an ameoba there was an ELEPHANT For the last chorus: And the elephant was on the ground, and the green grass grew all around, all around, and the green grass grew all around.
6. Bear Song: I met a Bear
(the tune of “the littlest worm) The other day, I met a bear A great big bear, a way out there He said to me, why don’t you run I see you ain’t got any gun And so I ran away from there, But right behind me was the bear Ahead of me, there was a tree A great big tree, oh glory be! The nearest branch was ten feet up, I’d have to jump and trust my luck And so I jumped into the air, But I missed that branch on the way up there Now don’t you fret, now don’t you frown, ‘Cause I caught that branch on the way back down! This is the end, There aint no more, Unless I see, That bear once more.
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7. Barrett’s Privateers
http://www.chivalry.com/cantaria/lyrics/barretts-‐privateers.html Oh, the year was 1778, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! A letter of marque came from the king, To the scummiest vessel I'd ever seen, God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. Oh, Elcid Barrett cried the town, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! For twenty brave men all fishermen who would make for him the Antelope's crew God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight,HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! She'd a list to the port and her sails in rags And the cook in scuppers with the staggers and the jags God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. On the King's birthday we put to sea, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! We were 91 days to Montego Bay Pumping like madmen all the way God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers.
On the 96th day we sailed again, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! When a bloody great Yankee hove in sight With our cracked four pounders we made to fight God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. The Yankee lay low down with gold, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! She was broad and fat and loose in the stays But to catch her took the Antelope two whole days God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. Then at length we stood two cables away, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! Our cracked four pounders made an awful din But with one fat ball the Yank stove us in God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. The Antelope shook and pitched on her side, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! Barrett was smashed like a bowl of eggs And the Maintruck carried off both me legs God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers. So here I lay in my 23rd year, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW! It's been 6 years since we sailed away And I just made Halifax yesterday
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God damn them all! I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold We'd fire no guns-‐shed no tears Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier The last of Barrett's Privateers.
8. Bill Grogan’s Goat
(tune = I met a bear) Leader sings and everyone repeats at each (*) Bill Grogan's goat,* was feeling fine.* Ate three red shirts,* right off the line.* Bill took a stick,* gave him three whacks,* And tied him to,* the railroad tracks.* The whistle blew,* the train grew nigh;* Bill Grogan's goat,* was doomed to die.* He gave three moans,* of mortal pain,* Barfed up those shirts,* and flagged that train.* The Engineer,* got out to see,* What in the world,* this thing could be.* And when he saw,* It was a goat,* Pulled out his knife,* and cut it's throat.* Now Billy Goat* is really dead,* He went to heaven,* without a head.* And when he got there,* St. Peter said,* 'Dear Billy Goat,* where is your head?'* I do not know,* I can not tell,* For all I know,* It just may be ...* Way down yonder in the paw paw patch.* (can migrate right into the Paw Paw Patch song) Lyrics: Where, oh where, oh where is Susie? Where, oh where, oh where is Susie? Where, oh where, of where is Susie? Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch.
Chorus: Pickin' up paw-‐paws; put 'em in a basket. Pickin' up paw-‐paws; put 'em in a basket. Pickin' up paw-‐paws; put 'em in a basket. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. Come along, boys, and let's go find her. Come along, boys, and let's go find her. Come along, boys, and let's go find her. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. -‐ Chorus She's a queen of old Hawaii. She's a queen of old Hawaii. She's a queen of old Hawaii. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. -‐ Chorus She can teach you how to hula. She can teach you how to hula. She can teach you how to hula. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. -‐ Chorus
9. Bingo
Farmer Brown had a dog and Bingo was his name B-‐I-‐N-‐G-‐O, B-‐I-‐N-‐G-‐O, B-‐I-‐N-‐G-‐O And Bingo was his name O. Repeat, each time replacing the last letter with a clap. Farmer Brown had a dog and Bingo was his name B-‐I-‐N-‐G-‐clap, B-‐I-‐N-‐G-‐clap, B-‐I-‐N-‐G-‐clap And Bingo was his name-‐O. Farmer Brown had a dog and Bingo was his name B-‐I-‐N-‐clap-‐clap, B-‐I-‐N-‐clap-‐clap, B-‐I-‐N-‐clap-‐clap And Bingo was his name O.
10. Blue Jay
Way down yonder, Not so very far off A Blue Jay died of the whooping cough He whooped so hard with the whooping cough That he whooped his head and his tail right off Second verse same as the first A little bit louder and a little bit worse
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... 5 – 10 verses
... start whispering and end shouting / whooping
11. Boogie Woogie Washer Woman
Way down the road where nobody goes, There's a boogie-‐woogie washer woman washing her clothes, Scrub, scrub, here, scrub, scrub, there, Scrub those stains right out of there! She goes: scrub, scrub, a-‐boogie, a-‐woogie, Scrub, scrub and a-‐boogie some more... She goes: scrub, scrub, a-‐boogie, a-‐woogie, Just a boogie-‐woogie washer woman washing her clothes! Yeah! Actions: Way down the road: shade hand over eyes, look into distance Where nobody goes: shake finger "no" There's a boogie-‐woogie washer woman washing her clothes: do the boogie Scrub, scrub, here: scrub invisible clothing on one knee Scrub, scrub, there: scrub on other knee Scrub those stains right out of there: scrubbing to the beat She goes: scrub, scrub: scrub on one knee, then the other, taking one step forward each time A-‐boogie, a-‐woogie: do the boogie, taking two steps backward Scrub, scrub and a-‐boogie some more: repeat action of above line She goes: scrub, scrub, a-‐boogie, a-‐woogie: repeat action Just a boogie-‐woogie washer woman washing her clothes: boogie, turning around in a circle
12. Boom Chicka Boom
I said a Boom Chicka Boom I said a Boom Chicka Boom I said a Boom Chicka Rocka Chicka Rocka Chicka Boom Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Janitor style. Janitor Style: I said a Broom Sweep-‐a Broom
I said a Broom Sweep-‐a Broom I said a Broom Sweep-‐a Mop-‐a Sweep-‐a Mop-‐a Sweep-‐a Broom Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Baseball style. Baseball Style: I said a boom chicka boom I said a boom chicka boom I said a boom chicka rocka hit that softball to the moon. Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Barn-‐yard style. Barn-‐yard Style: I said a moo chicka moo I said a moo chicka moo I said a moo chicka watch your step, don't track it in the room. Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Photographer style. Photographer Style: I said a zoom clicka zoom. I said a zoom clicka zoom. I said a zoom clicka Smile Watch the Birdie clicka zoom. Uh huh Oh yeah One more time MCDonalds style. McDonalds Style: I said a Big Mac and Fries I said a Big Mac and Fries I said a Big Mac and Fries and don’t forget to Super Size. Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Thunderstorm style. Thunderstorm Style: I said a boom crasha boom I said a boom crasha boom I said a boom crasha flasha crasha flasha crasha boom Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Sufer style.
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Surfer Style: I said a dude chicka dude I said a dude chicka dude I said a dude chicka wipe out chicka WHOA chicka dude Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Conservation style. Conservation Style: I said a tree hug a tree I said a tree hug a tree I said save the whales, save the gas, save the water, hug a tree Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Beavers style. Beavers Style: I said a Beaver chicka Boom I said a Beaver chicka Boom I said a Beaver collect the wood and build the dam chick boom Uh huh Oh yeah One more time Fire style. Fire Style: I said a OUCH chicka OUCH I said a OUCH chicka OUCH I said a OUCH burnt my finger in the fire Chicka OUCH Chicka Boom Uh huh Oh yeah One last time. I said a Boom Chicka Boom I said a Boom Chicka Boom I said a Boom Chicka Rocka Chicka Rocka Chicka Boom Uh huh Oh yeeeeeaaaahhhhhhhhh!! Version 2 (repeat after me song) I said a BOOM Chica BOOM I said a BOOM Chica BOOM I said a BOOMA Chica ROCKA Chica ROCKA Chica BOOM
Alright? Oh Yeah, One more time, Really. . . quiet loud valley girl (add, -‐like in everywhere) janitor (broom, sweepa broom, brooma sweepa mop-‐a, etc.) underwater (finger against lips) any other way you want. . .
13. Breakfast
(Tune = My Bonnie lies over the ocean) Your breakfast is calling this morning, Your bacon is crisp in the pan, Your pancakes are doing a flip, flop, I’m cooking as fast as I can. Get up! Get up! Oh, roll yourself out of the bed, the bed. Get up! Get up! Oh, don’t be an old sleepy head.
14. Cannibal King
Tune: http://www.boyscouttrail.com/content/song/cannibal_king-1635.asp The Cannibal King with the big nose ring Fell in love with the cute young maid And every night by the pale moonlight It sounded like this to me... Ah-‐rump (kiss kiss), Ah-‐rump (kiss kiss) Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a Ah-‐rump (kiss kiss), Ah-‐rump (kiss kiss) Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a As the years went by like one, two, three Soon there was a family And every night by the pale moonlight It sounded like this to me... Ah-‐rump ma-‐ma, Ah-‐rump, pa-‐pa
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Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a Ah-‐rump ma-‐ma, Ah-‐rump, pa-‐pa Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a As the years went by like one, two, three Soon a bigger family. And every night by the pale moonlight It sounded like this to me... Ah-‐rump gran-‐ma, Ah-‐rump gran-‐pa Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a Ah-‐rump gran-‐ma, Ah-‐rump gran-‐pa Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a As the years went by like one, two, three Soon there was no family And every night by the pale moonlight It sounded like this to me... Ah-‐rump (silent pause), Ah-‐rump (silent pause) Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a Ah-‐rump (silent pause), Ah-‐rump (silent pause) Ah-‐rump, Ditty-‐aye-‐dee-‐a-‐a-‐a
15. Coming of the Frogs
(tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic) http://www.boyscouttrail.com/content/song/battle_hymn_of_the_republic-‐457.asp Mine eyes have seen the horror of the coming of the frogs. They are sneaking through the swamps, they are lurking under logs. You can hear their mournful croaking through the early morning fog. The frogs keep hopping on. Chorus Ribbit, ribbit, ribbit, croak, croak (Repeat 3x) The frogs keep hopping on. The frogs have grown in numbers, and their croaking fills the air. There's no place to escape to 'cause the frogs are everywhere. They've eaten all the flies
and now they're hungry as a bear. The frogs keep hopping on. I used to like the bullfrogs, like to feel their slimy skin. Liked to put them in my teacher's desk and take them home again. Now they're knocking at the front door, I can't let those frogs come in. The frogs keep hopping on. They have hopped into the living room and headed down the hall. They have trapped me in the corner and my back's against the wall. And when I open up my mouth to give a desperate call. This is all that's heard: Ribbit, ribbit, ribbit, croak, croak...
16. Cuddly Koalas
(Tune = Frere Jacques) Cuddly koalas, cuddly koalas (cradle & swing arms) Possums too, possums too (possum eyes -‐ circle with finger & thumb brought up to eyes) Wallabies and wombats, wallabies and wombats (little bounce/jump/bend knees with hands in front, rather like begging action) Kangaroos, kangaroos (bigger jump, more exaggerated hands)
17. Dead Dog Rover
(Tune = Four Leaf Clover) http://www.boyscouttrail.com/content/song/song-‐494.asp I'm looking over my dead dog Rover Who I hit with a power mower One leg is missing; the other is gone The third leg is scattered all over the lawn. No need explaining the one leg remaining
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is spinning on the carport floor. I'm looking over my dead dog Rover, who I overlooked before. I'm looking over my minced dog Rover, who I hit with a power mower My dog's not eating, He no longer barks He hit the propeller and turned into sparks No need explaining; there's no dog remaining He's part of the grass you see. I'm looking over my dead dog Rover who I sent to eternity!
18. Deck the Halls
Tis the season to be naughty Falalalalalalalala Tell your father he is crummy Falalalalalalalala Break a window, pop a tire Falalalalalalalala Light your teachers pants on fire Falalalalalalalala Deck the halls with gasoline Falalalalalalalala Light a match and watch it gleam Falalalalalalalala Watch the school burn down to ashes Falalalalalalalala Aren't you glad you played with matches? Falalalalalalalala!
19. Don’t Wear No Socks Song
(Instead of "Your Momma", you could use "Camp Staff", "Boy Scouts", "Our Gang", ... whatever you want) Your Mama don't wear no socks A ding dong I saw 'em when she took 'em off A ding dong She threw them in the tree A ding dong Now the dogs refuse to pee A ding dong dong dong dong A ding dong dong dong dong A ding dong
She threw them on my bed -‐ now my poor Teddy's dead She threw them in her bed -‐ now dad sleeps in the shed She threw them under the bed -‐ left all the cockroaches dead She served them up for lunch -‐ but no one wanted much She put them in the fridge -‐ now we all live under a bridge She threw them in the sky -‐ now Superman refuses to fly She threw them in the air -‐ now Superman's on medicare She threw them over the fence -‐ haven't seen the neighbor since She threw them on the wall -‐ now Spiderman won't crawl She threw them on the ceiling -‐ now the paint's all peeling She threw them in a boat -‐ now that boat can't float She threw them at the cat -‐ now the cat's a welcome mat She threw them on the clock -‐ now the clock don't tick or tock She threw them up towards heaven -‐ brought down a 7-‐4-‐7 She threw them in the garbage can -‐ killed 3 rats and the garbage man She threw them in the washing machine -‐ now all the clothes are green She threw them at a squirrel -‐ made that poor squirrel hurl She threw them at a rock -‐ that rock got up and walked She threw them at a bus -‐ you should have heard it cuss She threw them at a flower -‐ now it's praying for an April shower She threw them in the fire -‐ that made the fire expire She threw them in my Coke – I took a sip and nearly croaked. She threw them at the sun – Made the sun dial 911 She threw them on a telephone wire -‐ Started the Chicago fire She threw them in a hole -‐ Wouldn't touch 'em with a 10 foot pole She thew them in outer space -‐ That's the end of the human race She threw them at King Kong -‐ That's the end of this silly song
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20. Down by the Bay
Tune: http://www.songsforteaching.com/folk/downbythebay.php Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow Back to my home I dare not go For if I do My mother will say "Did you ever see a fly Wearing a tie?" Down by the bay. Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow B ack to my home I dare not go For if I do My mother will say "Did you ever see a bear Combing his hair?" Down by the bay. Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow Back to my home I dare not go For if I do My mother will say "Did you ever see a moose Kissing a goose?" Down by the bay. Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow Back to my home I dare not go For if I do My mother will say "Did you ever see a whale With a polka dot tail?" Down by the bay. Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do My mother will say "Did you ever see a llama Wearing pajamas?" Down by the bay. Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow Back to my home I dare not go For if I do My mother will say "Did you ever have a time When you couldn't make a rhyme?" Down by the bay
21. Do Your Ears Hang Low
Do your ears hang low, do they waggle to and fro? Can you tie them in a knot, can you tie them is a bow? Can you throw them o'er your shoulder like a continental soldier? Do your ears hang low? Do your ears stick out, can you waggle them about? Can you flap them up and down as you fly around the town? Can you shut them up for sure when you hear an awful bore? Do your ears stick out? Do your ears stand high, do they reach up to the sky? Do they hang down when they're wet, do they stand up when they're dry? Can you semaphore your neighbor with the minimum of labor? Do your ears stand high?
22. Farewell to Nova Scotia
Tune: http://www.contemplator.com/canaus/novascot.html The sun was setting in the west The birds were singing on every tree All nature seemed inclined for to rest But still there was no rest for me.
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Chorus Farewell to Nova Scotia, you sea-‐bound coast Let your mountains dark and dreary be For when I am far away on the briny ocean tossed Will you ever heave a sigh and a wish for me? I grieve to leave my native land I grieve to leave my comrades all And my parents whom I held so dear And the bonnie, bonnie lassie that I do adore. Chorus The drums they do beat and the wars to alarm The captain calls, we must obey So farewell, farewell to Nova Scotia's charms For it's early in the morning I am far, far away. Chorus I have three brothers and they are at rest Their arms are folded on their breast But a poor simple sailor just like me Must be tossed and driven on the dark blue sea. Chorus
23. Fire’s Burning (Campfire)
(round) Fire’s Burning, fire’s burning, Draw Nearer, Draw nearer In the glowing, in the glowing Come sing and be merry
24. Fruit Salad
An activity song. Each set of beavers gets to be one kind of fruit which has a different cheer and sometimes an action: Apples, peaches, pears and plums coconuts, coconuts (hit head and click tongue three times) Banana NA, NA, na na NA Grapes, Grapes, do-‐ah, do-‐ah Watermelon, Watermelon (spit out seeds)
Raspberry, Raspberry (raspberry x3) Papaya, Papaya, p-‐p-‐p-‐papaya You bring each group of beavers in one by one, then motion with your hands for louder and softer, then bring each set out one by one.
25. Frankenstein Song
(Tune: Clementine) In a castle, on a mountain, Near the dark and murky Rhine. Dwelt a doctor, the concoctor, Of the monster, Frankenstein. Chorus Oh my monster, oh my monster, Oh my monster, Frankenstein. You were built to last forever, Dreadful scary Frankenstein. In a graveyard, near the castle, Where the sun refused to shine, He found noses and some toeses For his monster Frankenstein. Chorus So he took them and he built him, From the pieces he did find. And with lightning he animated The scary monster Frankenstein. Chorus Scared the townsfolk, scared the Police, Scared the kids did Frankenstein, Til with torches, they did chase him, To the castle by the Rhine. Chorus
26. Ga Goo
Ga goo went the little green frog one day Ga goo went the little green frog Ga goo went the little green frog one day And his eyes when ga ga goo. Now you know frogs go la di da di da
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la di da di da la di da di da Now you know frogs go la di da di da They don't go ga ga goo.
27. Good King Wences
(Tune = Good King Wencelas) Good King Wences' car backed out On the feet of Stephen. "Watch out, king, I'll get you yet; Yes, I will get even." Later on that very day Stephen kept his wo-‐ord: He shot Wences with a bang, And that's the last I hea-‐a-‐rd.
28. Good Ole Hockey Game
Tune: http://www.wtv-‐zone.com/phyrst/audio/nfld/08/hockey.htm Hello out there! We're on the air, It's Hockey Night tonight; Tension grows, the whistle blows, And the puck goes down the ice. The goalie jumps, and the players bump, And the fans all go insane; Someone roars, "Bobby scores!" At the good old hockey game. Oh! The good old hockey game, Is the best game you can name; And the best game you can name, Is the good old Hockey game! [spoken] "Second period...." Where players dash with skates a-‐flash, The home team trails behind; But they grab the puck and go bursting up, And they're down across the line. They storm the crease like bumble bees, They travel like a burning flame; We see them slide the puck inside, It's a one-‐one hockey game.
Oh! The good old hockey game, Is the best game you can name; And the best game you can name, Is the good old Hockey game! [spoken] "Third period! Last game in the playoffs, too!" Oh, take me where the hockey players Face-‐off down the rink; And the Stanley Cup is all filled up, For the champs who win the drink. Now the final flick of a hockey stick, And the one gigantic scream: "The puck is in" -‐ The home team wins The good old hockey game! Oh! The good old hockey game, Is the best game you can name; And the best game you can name, Is the good old Hockey game!
29. Ging Gang Gooli
Ging gang gooli, gooli, gooli, gooli watcha Ging gang goo, ging gang goo, Ging gang gooli, gooli, gooli, gooli watcha Ging gang goo, ging gang goo Heyla, heyla sheyla Heyla sheyla, heyla, ho-‐o-‐o Heyla, heyla sheyla Heyla sheyla, heyla, ho Shalli-‐wallee, shalli-‐wallee, shalli-‐wallee,shalli-‐wallee Oompah, oompah, oompah oompah Shalli-‐wallee, shalli-‐wallee, shalli-‐wallee,shalli-‐wallee Oompah, oompah, oompah oompah
30. Going on a Lion Hunt
(repeat after me song) Going on a Lion Hunt Gonna Catch a big one! I’m not scared, I’ve got my gun! Uh oh, Big Tall Grass Can’t go over it,
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Can’t go under it, Can’t go around it, Gotta go through it! (swish, swish, swish, swish) Repeat, but find different obstacles: 2. Thick, dirty mud 3. Big tall trees (climb) 4. Deep dark cave 5. Red beady eyes, furry mane, wet nose, sticky pink tongue. . . it’s a lion! Run! Go through all obstacles, and arrive home.
31. Granny's In the Cellar Song
Granny's in the cellar. Oh Lordy can't ya smell her, Cooking Biscuits on that darn old greasy stove. In her eye there is some matter that keeps drippin' in the batter And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. Chorus: Down her nose, down her nose, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. In her eye there is some matter that keeps drippin' in the batter, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. Granny's in the cellar. Oh Lordy can't ya smell her, Cooking Grits on that darn old greasy stove. On her belly, there's some zits that keep poppin' in the grits, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. Chorus: Down her nose, down her nose, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. On her belly, there's some zits that keep poppin' in the grits, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose.
Granny's in the cellar. Oh Lordy can't ya smell her, Cooking Crabs on that darn old greasy stove. On her elbow, there's some scabs that keep fallin' in the crabs, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. -‐ Chorus Granny's in the cellar. Oh Lordy can't ya smell her, Cooking Fries on that darn old greasy stove. On her belly there's a boil that keeps oozin' in the oil, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. -‐ Chorus Granny's in the cellar. Oh Lordy can't ya smell her, Cooking Rice on that darn old greasy stove. In her hair there is some lice that keep jumpin' in the rice, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. -‐ Chorus Granny's in the cellar. Oh Lordy can't ya smell her, Cooking Cobbler on that darn old greasy stove. Her glass eye is a wobbler and keeps fallin' in the cobbler, And she whistles while the [Sniff] drips down her nose. – Chorus
32. Grimy Greasy Gopher Guts
http://www.boyscouttrail.com/content/song/greasy_grimy_gopher_guts-467.asp Version (1) Great green gobs of grimy greasy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Little dirty birdy feet All wrapped up in percolated porpoise pus And I forgot my spoon I forgot my spoon! I forgot my spoon! Great green gobs of grimy greasy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Little dirty birdy feet All wrapped up in percolated porpoise pus
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And I forgot my spoon…..but I got a straw… Version (2) Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts Mutilated monkey meat Hairy pickled piggy feet French fried eyeballs floating in some kerosene And me without a spoon. Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts Scab sandwich, puss on top Vulture vomit, camel snot Deep dish boogers soaking in a bowl of fat And me without a spoon. Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts Parrot eyeballs dipped in glue Petrified porpoise puss Flaming ear wax bobbing in a bowl of barf And me without a spoon. Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts Dessicated dinosaur dung Percollated pelican poop Tortoise turd balls with the little flies inside And me without a spoon.
33. Gotta Booga
Tune: If you’re happy and you know it Gotta booger on my finger get it off (*clap, clap*) Gotta booger on my finger get it off (*clap, clap*) Gotta another on my brother Gotta a dozen on my cousin Gotta booger on my finger get it off (*clap, clap*)
34. Hagaleena Magaleena
Chorus Hagaleena Magaleena Upa Staka Waka Taka Oka Poka Loka was her name. (Clap Clap) There was a funny girl, she had a funny name. She got it from her pappy just the same, same, same. Chorus She had two hairs in the middle of her head
One was alive (put one finger on top of your head) And the other one was dead (put another finger on top of your head) Chorus She had two eyes in the front of her head One was green and the other was red. Chorus She had two teeth in the front of her mouth One pointed north (put one finger against your mouth, pointing north) And one the other pointed south (put another finger against your mouth, pointing south) Chorus She had two lips, two beautiful lips, Shaped just like two battleships. Chorus Her nose was so long that when she sneezed It got caught in between her knees. Chorus Her ears stuck out like the sails of a boat Her Adam’s apple wandered up and down her throat. Chorus She had two arms in the middle of her body One knew judo (horizontal karate chop motion) And the other knew karate (vertical karate chop motion) Chorus She loved to polish her fingernails She bought her polish in ten gallon pails. Chorus She had two feet size twelve and a half One took a shower (kick out one foot) And the other took a bath (kick out the other foot) Chorus Her feet were flat as bathroom mats I forgot to ask how they got like that. Chorus
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A semi-‐truck hit Mag-‐a-‐leena (slow down during this line) (back to original tempo) Completely destroyed that poor machina! Chorus
35. Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes
Head and shoulders, knees and toes, Knees and toes, knees and toes, Head and shoulders, knees and toes, Eyes, ears, mouth and nose.
36. Herman the Worm'n
Sitting on a fence post, Chewing my bubble gum. (As if smacking your lips. Four times.) Playing with my yoyo. (Woo-‐woo) When along came Herman the Wormin' And he was this big. (Slow the tempo with "this big". Demonstrate how big as if by holding up your hands as if you'd just caught a small fish.) And I said, "Herman! What happened?" And he said, "I ate a beaver." Each verse, Herman gets bigger. . . I ate a Cub I ate a Scout I ate a Venturer I ate a Rover I ate a Leader For the last verse, Herman is tiny again. . And I said, "Herman! What happened?" And he said, "I burped."
37. He's Got the Whole World
He's got the whole world, in his hands He's got the whole world, in his hands He's got the whole world, in his hands He's got the whole world in his hands .. He's got the little bitty baby, in his hands ... .. He's got you and me brother, in his hands ... .. He's got you and me sister, in his hands ...
.. He got everybody here, in his hands ...
.. He's got the little bitty babies, in his hands ...
.. He's got the wind and the rain, in his hands ...
38. The Hippopotamus Song
A bold hippopotamus was standing one day On the banks of the cool Shalimar He gazed at the bottom as he peacefully lay By the light of the evening star Away on the hilltop sat combing her hair His fair hippopotami maid The hippopotamus was no ignoramus And sang her this sweet serenade Chorus: Mud, mud, glorious mud Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood So follow me follow, down to the hollow And there let me wallow in glorious mud The fair hippopotama he aimed to entice From her seat on that hilltop above As she hadn't got a ma to give her advice Came tiptoeing down to her love Like thunder the forest re-‐echoed the sound Of the song that they sang when they met His inamorata adjusted her garter And lifted her voice in duet Chorus Now more hippopotami began to convene On the banks of that river so wide I wonder now what am I to say of the scene That ensued by the Shalimar side They dived all at once with an ear-‐splitting sposh Then rose to the surface again A regular army of hippopotami All singing this haunting refrain Chorus (Extra verse:) The amorous hippopotamus whose love song we know Is now married and father of ten, He murmurs, "God rot 'em!" as he watches them grow,
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And he longs to be single again! He'll gambol no more on the banks of the Nile, Which Naser is flooding next spring, With hippopotamas in silken pyjamas No more will he teach them to sing...
39. Hole in the Bottom of the Sea
There's a hole in the bottom of the sea, There's a hole in the bottom of the sea, There's a hole, there's a hole, There's a hole in the bottom of the sea. There's a log in the hole in the bottom of the sea, There's a log in the hole in the bottom of the sea, There's a hole, there's a hole, There's a hole in the bottom of the sea. There's a bump on the log in the hole ... etc. There's a frog on the bump on the log ... etc. There's a fly on the frog on the bump ... etc. There's a wing on the fly on the frog ... etc. last verse: There's a flea on the wing on the fly on the frog on the bump on the log in the hole in the bottom of the sea... There's a hole, there's a hole, There's a hole in the bottom of the sea.
40. Hokey Pokey
You put your left foot in You take your left foot out, You put your left foot in, And you shake it all about. You do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around. And that's what it's all about. Hey! (Continue using various body parts.)
41. I Know An Old Lady
I know an old lady, Who swallowed a fly, I don't know why, She swallowed a fly I guess she'll die. I know an old lady, Who swallowed a spider, That wriggled, and jiggled And tickled inside her, She swallowed the spider to Catch the fly, But I don't know why she Swallowed the fly. I guess she'll die. Bird -‐ now how absurd, to swallow a bird. Cat -‐ now fancy that, to swallow a cat. Dog -‐ my what a hog, to swallow a dog. Goat -‐ just opened her throat, and in walked a goat. Cow -‐ I don't know how, she swallowed a cow. Horse -‐ 'she died of course'
42. I met a Bear
Audience repeats each short line after the leader, then everyone sings the whole verse together. The other day, I met a bear, Out in the woods, away out there. [Point] The other day, I met a bear. Out in the woods, away out there. He looked at me, I looked at him, He sized up me, I sized up him. He looked at me, I looked at him. He sized up me, I sized up him. He says to me, 'Why don't you run?' 'Cause I can see, you got no gun.'
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He says to me, 'Why don't you run?' 'Cause I can see you got no gun.' I says to him, 'That's a good idea.' 'Now legs get going, get me out of here!' I says to him, 'That's a good idea.' 'Now legs get going, get me out of here! 'I began to run, away from there, But right behind me was that bear. 'I began to run, away from there, But right behind me was that bear. And on the path ahead of me, I saw a tree, Oh glory be. And on the path ahead of me, I saw a tree, Oh glory be. The lowest branch was ten feet up, I'd have to jump and trust my luck. The lowest branch was ten feet up, I'd have to jump and trust my luck. And so I jumped into the air, But I missed that branch away up there. And so I jumped into the air, But I missed that branch away up there. Now don't you fret, and don't you frown, I caught that branch on the way back down.
Now don't you fret, and don't you frown, I caught that branch on the way back down. That's all there is, there ain't no more, Unless I meet that bear once more. That's all there is, there ain't no more, Unless I meet that bear once more.
43. If You're Happy and You Know It
If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, If you're happy and you know it clap your hands. If you're happy and you know it and you really want to show it, If you're happy and you know it clap your hands. repeat with: stamp your feet shout hurray do all three
44. If you’re lost and you know it
If you’re lost and you know it hug a tree If you’re lost and you know it hug a tree If you’re lost and you know it, and you have a whistle blow it If you’re lost and you know it, hug a tree If you’re lost and you’re cold put on a bag If you’re lost and you’re cold put on a bag If you’re lost and you know it, and you have a whistle blow it If you’re lost and you’re cold put on a bag If you’re lost and you’re scared tell a tree (whisper: I’M SCARED) If you’re lost and you’re scared tell a tree (whisper: I’M SCARED) If you’re lost and you know it, and you have a whistle blow it If you’re lost and you’re scared tell a tree (whisper: I’M SCARED) If you’re lost in the forest do all three If you’re lost in the forest do all three
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If you’re lost in the forest hug a tree, put on a bag, tell a tree (whisper: I’M SCARED) If you’re lost and you know it, and you have a whistle blow it If you’re lost in the forest do all three
45. I've Got a Head Like a Ping Pong Ball
I've got a head like a ping pong ball, I've got a head like a ping pong ball, I've got a head like a ping pong ball, Ping! Like ping pong ball. I've got a head like a ping pong ping pong ping pong ping pong ping pong ball, I've got a head like a ping pong ping pong ping pong ping pong ping pong ball, Ping ping ping ping ping ping ping ping ping. Ping!
46. It’s a Small World
It's a world of laughter, a world of tears It's a world of hopes and a world of fears There's so much that we share That it's time we're aware It's a small world after all Chorus: It's a small world after all It's a small world after all It's a small world after all It's a small, small world There is just one moon and one golden sun And a smile means friendship to everyone Though the mountains divide And the oceans are wide It's a small world after all
47. I’ve Been Working on the Railroad
I’ve been working on the railroad, All the livelong day; I’ve been working on the railroad, Just to pass the time away Don’t you hear the whistle blowing, Rise up so early in the morn? Don’t you hear the captain shouting “Dinah, blow your horn?”
Dinah, won’t you blow, Dinah, won’t you blow, Dinah, won’t you blow your horn? Dinah, won’t you blow, Dinah, won’t you blow, Dinah, won’t you blow your horn? Someone’s in the kitchen with Dinah, Someone’s in the kitchen, I know; Someone’s in the kitchen with Dinah, Playing on the old banjo. Fee, fie, fiddlie-‐i-‐o Fee, fie, fiddlie-‐i-‐o Fee, fie, fiddlie-‐i-‐o Playing on the old banjo.
48. Jungle Book Rap
(To a beat 1,2,3 like Queen’s “We will Rock You”) Leader: I am Akela of the Seeonee Group: Seeonee Seeonee Leader: I’m the Leader of the pack and they follow
me. Group: Follow me Follow me Leader: Bagheera the Panther is sleek and black. Group: Sleek and black sleek and black Leader: He’s a silent hunter and friend of the pack. Group: Friend of the pack friend of the pack Leader: Baloo the teacher a big brown bear. Group: Big brown bear big brown bear Leader: He’s always welcome in a Wolf Cub’s lair. Group: Wolf Cub’s lair Wolf Cub’s lair Leader: Bandar-‐log, monkeys a silly bunch. Group: A silly bunch a silly bunch Leader: They’ll end up as a python’s lunch. Group: Python’s lunch python’s lunch Leader: Kaa the python don’t be ‘fraid of him. Group: ‘Fraid of him ‘fraid of him Leader: He taught Mowgli how to swim. Group: How to swim how to swim
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Leader: Tabaqui the jackal is sneaky and mean. Group: Sneaky and mean sneaky and mean Leader: He’ll smile in you face while he picks your
bones clean. Group: Picks your bones clean picks your bones
clean. Leader: Raksha, the Demon, Mowgli’s mom Group: Mowgli’s mom Mowgli’s mom Leader: She kept him safe from Ol’ Sheer Khan. Group: Ol’ Sheer Khan Ol’ Sheer Khan Leader: Sheer Khan the Tiger, a mangy ol’ cat Group: A mangy ol’ cat a mangy ol’ cat Leader: Mowgli killed him and that was that. Group: That was that that was that
49. King of Caractacus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP2ITVsOMIQ The ladies of the harem of the court of King Caractacus were just passing by, Repeat 4x The noses on the faces of the ladies of the court of King Caractacus were just passing by, Repeat 4x The boys who put the powder on the noses of the faces of the ladies of the court of King Caractacus were just passing by, Repeat 4x The fascinating witches who put the scintillating stitches in the britches of the boys who put the powder on the noses of the faces of the ladies of the harem of the court of king Caractacus were just passing by, Repeat 4x If you want to take a picture of the fascinating witches who put the scintillating stitches in the britches of the boys who put the powder on the noses of the faces of the ladies of the harem of the court of King Caractacus, you’re TOO LATE, they JUST PASSED BY!
50. Kum By Yah
Kum by yah, my lord, kum by yah Kum by yah, my lord, kum by yah Kum by yah, my lord, kum by yah Oh, lord, kum by yah. Someone’s crying, my lord, kum by yah, Someone’s crying, my lord, kum by yah, Someone’s crying my lord, kum by yah, Oh, lord, kum by yah. Next verses: Someone’s praying, my lord, kum by yah Someone’s laughing, my lord, kum by yah Someone’s singing, my lord, kum by yah
51. Land of the Silver Birch
Land of the silver birch, home of the beaver Where still the mighty moose wanders at will Blue lake and rocky shore, I will return once more
Boom diddy ah da, Boom diddy ah da, Boom High on a rocky ledge I’ll build my wigwam Close to the water’s edge silent and still Blue lake and rocky shore, I will return once more Boom diddy ah da, Boom diddy ah da, Boom My heart grows sick for thee here in the lowlands I will return to thee hills of the north Blue lack and rocky shore, I will return once more Boom diddy ah da, Boom diddy ah da, Boom Land of the silver birch, home of the beaver Where still the mighty moose wanders at will Blue lake and rocky shore, I will return once more Boom diddy ah da, Boom diddy ah da, Boom
52. The Littlest Worm
(repeat after me song) The Littlest worm I ever saw Got stuck inside My soda straw (all together repeat verse)
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He said to me Don’t take a sip For if you do I’ll surely slip I took a sip And he went down All through my pipes He must have drowned He was my pal He was my friend But now he’s gone And that’s the end The moral of This story is Don’t take a sip Of soda fizz DRINK MILK!!
53. I want to Linger
Hm-‐hm, I want to linger, hm-‐hm, a little longer, hm-‐hm , a little longer here with you Hm-‐hm, it's such a perfect night, hm-‐hm it doesn't seem quite right Hm-‐hm, that this should be my last with you. Hm-‐hm, I want to linger, hm-‐hm, a little longer, hm-‐hm , a little longer here with you Hm-‐hm, and in September, hm-‐hm, I will remember, Hm-‐hm, our Scouting days of friendship true. Hm-‐hm, I want to linger, hm-‐hm, a little longer, hm-‐hm , a little longer here with you Hm-‐hm, and as the years go by, hm-‐hm, I'll think of you and sigh Hm-‐hm, this is goodnight but not goodbye.
54. Moose Song
(Leader/Response for each line.) There was a great big moose, He used to drink a lot of juice.
There was a great big moose. He used to drink a lot of juice. Wo ahohoh, Way oh Way oh Way oh Way oh, Way oh Way oh, Way oh Way oh Way oh Way oh. Well, his name was Fred. He used to drink his juice in bed. Well, his name was Fred. He used to drink his juice in bed. He drank his juice with care, But he spilled it on his hair. He drank his juice with care, But he spilled it on his hair. Now he's a sticky moose He's a moose — full of juice — on the loose!
55. Mountain Dew Song
Lyrics: My brother Bill runs a still on the hill Where he turns out a gallon or two (or three) And the buzzards in the sky get so drunk they can not fly Just from sniffing that good ol' mountain dew. Chorus: They call it that good ol' mountan dew, And them that refuse it are few. I'll hush up my mug if you'll fill up my jug With that good ol' mountain dew. My aunt Lucille had an automobile, It ran on a gallon or two (or three) It didn't need no gas and it went awful fast Running on that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus My uncle Mort, he is sawed off and short, He measures 'bout four foot two (or three) But he thinks he's a giant when you give him a pint Of that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus Old Auntie June had a brand new perfume,
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It had such a wonderful 'pew' (pee-‐ew) But to her surprise, when she had it analyzed, It was nothing but that good ol' mountain dew -‐ Chorus My Uncle Art, he ain’t very smart His IQ is just twenty two (or three) But he thinks he’s a wizard, when he fills up his gizzard With that good ol' mountain dew -‐ Chorus My Uncle Hank bought an old army tank Way back in ‘forty two (or three). It wouldn't budge, ‘till he gave it a gludge Of that good ol' mountain dew -‐ Chorus I know a guy named Pete, his hair ain't so neat, Though he fixes it with syrup and blue (what's blue?) But it stays right in place when he uses just a trace Of that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus The preacher-‐he walked by, with a big tear in his eye Said that his wife had the flu (boo hoo) And hadn't I ought just to give him a quart Of that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus My uncle Klaus had a real mean old mouse It'd beat up a cat or two ( or three) When they asked how it happened, He said it was a lappin' That good ol' mountain dew -‐ Chorus There's an old hollow tree, just a little way from me Where you lay down a dollar or two If you hush up your mug, then they'll give you a jug Of that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus You take a little trash and you mix it up with ash, And you throw in the soul of a shoe. Then you stir it awhile with an old rusty file, And they call it that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus
During the last war, we couldn't get no more, We didn't have no sugar for the dew With a few old potaters and a few ripe tomaters, We turned out some stuff, I'm tellin' you. -‐ Chorus Old Deacon Crane took a trip in the rain, Said his wife had come down with the flu, But she'll be all right if you give her a pint Of that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus Mr. Franklin Roosevelt, he told me how he felt The day the old dry law went through: If your likker's too red, it will swell up your head Better stick to that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus Old auntie Bess had some hair on her chest. I asked her if she put it there with glue. She said, "Heck No! It just started to grow, When I took up drinking mountain dew." -‐ Chorus My cousin Jake, he was bit by a snake. And the doc thought he wouldn't pull through. But he up and danced a jig when they gave him a swig Of that good ol' mountain dew. -‐ Chorus More verses ... The scouts yell all day and they like to play Maybe sing a song or two (or three) The key may be wrong but they'll sing out strong For that good ol' Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus The summer camp staff could sure use a bath Maybe one or two (or three) They surely will laugh if you give 'em a bath In that good ol' Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus The racoons at night sure give us a fright They come in by ones or twos (or threes) But we chase them off fast when they come for our glass Of that good ol' Mountain Dew
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-‐ Chorus The beachfront is great and we hardly can wait To swim for an hour or two (or three) The water will fizz when we take a whiz After drinking that Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus Now that we're home we still like the foam When we drink a can or two (or three) We'll be back next year and then we'll cheer For our good ol' Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus Our old buddy Paul really is tall He stands about six foot two (or three) He got that way from drinking each day A six-‐pack of Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus Our SPL Pete has bad stinky feet You can smell 'em for a mile or two (or three) But they smell awful sweet if you dose 'em in DEET then rinse 'em with Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus My uncle Crocker, he was a boxer He'd give 'em the old one two (or three) He wouldn't fight, it just wouldn't be right Unless it was for his Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus We went up the Brule, right before school To kayak a mile or two (or three) We sure did row once we had a go At that good ol' Mountain Dew -‐ Chorus That darn IRS wants my money, God Bless! I'd like to keep a dollar or two (or three) They'll settle for less, if I fill up their glass With that good old Mountain Dew -‐Chorus
56. Mrs. O'Leary's Cow (Old Mother Leary)
Five nights ago, When we were all in bed,
Old Mrs. Leary left the lantern in the shed And when the cow kicked it over, She winked her eye and said It'll be a hot time, in the old town, tonight! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE! Four nights ago, When we were all in bed, Old Mrs. Leary left the lantern in the shed And when the cow kicked it over, She winked her eye and said It'll be a hot time, in the old town, tonight! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE! Three nights ago, When we were all in bed, Old Mrs. Leary left the lantern in the shed And when the cow kicked it over, She winked her eye and said It'll be a hot time, in the old town, tonight! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE! Two nights ago, When we were all in bed, Old Mrs. Leary left the lantern in the shed And when the cow kicked it over, She winked her eye and said It'll be a hot time, in the old town, tonight! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE! One night ago, When we were all in bed, Old Mrs. Leary left the lantern in the shed And when the cow kicked it over, She winked her eye and said It'll be a hot time, in the old town, tonight! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!
57. My Bonnie
My Bonnie lies over the ocean My Bonnie lies over the sea My Bonnie lies over the ocean Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me. Chorus: Bring back, bring back, Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me, to me. Bring back, bring back,
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Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me. Other Bonnie verses: My Bonnie has tuberculosis. My Bonnie has only one lung. My Bonnie can cough up raw oysters, and roll them around on her tongue. My Bonnie has tuberculosis. My Bonnie has only one lung. My Bonnie spits blood in her pocket And dries it and chews it for gum. My Bonnie leaned over the gas tank, The height of its contents to see; I lighted a match to assist her, Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me. Last night as I lay on my pillow, Last night as I lay on my bed, I stuck my feet out of the window, This morning my neighbors were dead. Bring back, bring back, Oh bring back my neighbors to me, to me. Bring back, bring back, Oh bring back my neighbors to me. My mother’s an apple pie maker. My father he fiddles for tin. My sister scrubs floors for a living. Oh boy, how the money rolls in. Rolls in, rolls in, Oh boy, how the money rolls in, rolls in. Rolls in, rolls in, Oh boy, how the money rolls in. My breakfast lies over the ocean. My dinner lies over the sea. My stomach is in a commotion, Don't mention my supper to me. Chorus Bring back, bring back, Oh bring back my bucket to me, to me. Bring back, bring back, Oh bring back my bucket to me. I really felt rotten this morning, They tell me I really looked pale,
My stomach gave adequate warning, To lean far out over the rail. Chorus The sound of a stomach in motion, A murmuring noise inside me, I looked down and there on the water, Was breakfast and dinner and tea. Chorus
58. My Momma Don't Wear No Socks
My momma don't wear no socks (a ding dong) I saw her take them off, (a ding dong) She threw them on the plate, Guess what my brother ate! Chorus: A Ding-‐dong, dong, dong, dong A Ding-‐dong, dong, dong, dong A Ding-‐dong. …in the sky … superman refused to fly. ... in the fire ... those flames grew higher and higher. ... in the boat ... that boat refused to float. ... in the trees ... grossed out the squirrels and bees. ... in the lake ... that killed off every snake. ... in the house ... that shook up every mouse. ... in the car ... that car did not go far. ... into space ... that ended the human race. ... over the fence ... haven't seen our neighbours since. ... in our tent ... sure wish we had a vent. ... in the sky ... bats and birds refused to fly. ... on the floor ... cockroaches moved in next door. ... in my coke ... it made me gag and choke. ... round the bend ... that means THIS IS THE END.
59. My Stomach has Had it!
(My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean) My stomach is in a commotion I want to lean over the rail I don't want to dirty the ocean So somebody bring me a pail. Come up, come up, Come up my diner, come up, come up. Come up, come up, Come up my diner, come up.
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I'm coming, I'm coming For my head is bending low. I hear those gentle voice calling "Hasten Jason, bring the basin, Oops, flop, bring the mop!" Variation My breakfast lies over the ocean, My dinner lies over the sea, My stomach is in a commotion, Don't mention my supper to me. Chorus: Bring back, bring back, Oh bring back my bucket to me, to me. I really felt rotten this morning, They tell me I really looked pale, My stomach gave adequate warning, To lean far out over the rail. The sound of a stomach in motion, A murmuring noise inside me, I looked down and there on the water, Was breakfast and dinner and tea.
60. My Turkey
(Tune = My Bonnie lies over the ocean) My turkey went walking one morning The November weather to see. A man with a hatchet approached her Oh, bring back my turkey to me. Chorus Gobble, Gobble, Oh bring back my turkey to me, to me. Gobble, Gobble, Oh bring back my turkey to me! I went down the sidewalk a shoppin’ The sights in show windows to see. And everywhere hung great fat gobblers. Oh, bring back my turkey to me. Chorus I went out to dinner and ordered The best things they had I could see. They brought it all roasted and sizzling;
They brought back my turkey to me. Chorus My turkey has two juicy drumsticks My turkey has two crispy wings My turkey has ten pounds of stuffing But only one wishbone, poor thing! Chorus My turkey looked great on the platter My turkey looked great on my dish But after that last turkey sandwich Hold onto that wishbone and wish! Chorus
61. Nobody Likes Me
Nobody likes me, Everybody hates me, Going to the garden to eat worms, yum, yum. Big, fat, juicy ones, Long slim slimy worms, Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms. Yum, yum. Down went the first one. Down went the second one. Third one caught in my throat. (cough, cough) Big, fat, juicy ones, Long slim slimy worms, Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy, wuzzy worms. Yum, yum. Up went the first one. Up went the second one. Third one caught in my throat. (cough, cough) Big, fat, juicy ones, Long slim slimy worms, Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms. Yum, yum.
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62. On top of Spaghetti
On top of spaghetti all covered with cheese I lost my poor meatball when somebody sneezed It rolled off the table and onto the floor And than my poor meatball rolled out of the door It rolled into the garden and under a bush And than my poor meatball was nothing but mush The mush was as tasty as tasty could be Then early next summer it grew into a tree The tree was all covered with beautiful moss It grew lovely meatballs with tomato sauce So next time you eat s'getti all covered with cheese Hang onto your meatball and don't ever sneeze! The naughty (School Teacher version)
Up on a mountian, Where my teacher stood, She was shot with a rubber band, She didn't look good. I went to her funeral, I went to her grave. Some people threw flowers, I threw a grenade. The coffin went Up, Up, Up. The coffin went Down, Down, Down. The coffin went SPLAT! SPLAT! SPLAT! Right into the ground I opened the coffin, She didn't look dead, So I took my bazooka, And shot off her head.
63. Paw Paw Patch
Where, oh where, oh where is Susie? Where, oh where, oh where is Susie? Where, oh where, of where is Susie? Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. Chorus: Pickin' up paw-‐paws; put 'em in a basket.
Pickin' up paw-‐paws; put 'em in a basket. Pickin' up paw-‐paws; put 'em in a basket. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. Come along, boys, and let's go find her. Come along, boys, and let's go find her. Come along, boys, and let's go find her. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. -‐ Chorus She's a queen of old Hawaii. She's a queen of old Hawaii. She's a queen of old Hawaii. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch. -‐ Chorus She can teach you how to hula. She can teach you how to hula. She can teach you how to hula. Way down yonder in the paw-‐paw patch.
64. Pink Pajamas
(tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic) tune: http://www.boyscouttrail.com/content/song/battle_hymn_of_the_republic-‐457.asp I wear my pink pajamas in the summer when it's hot. I wear my flannel nighties in the winter when it's not. And sometime in the springtime and sometimes in the fall. I jump right in between the sheets with nothing on at all. Glory, glory, hallelujah; Glory, glory, what's it to ya. Balmy breezes blowing through ya. With nothing on at all.
65. Puff the Magic Dragon
Chorus Puff, the magic dragon live by the sea And frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee, Little Jackie Paper loved that rascal Puff And brought him strings and sealing wax
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and other fancy stuff. Together they would travel on a boat with billowed sail, Jackie kept a lookout perched on Puff’s gigantic tail, Noble kings and princes would bow where’er they came, Pirate ships would low’r their flag when Puff roared out his name. A dragon lives forever but not so little boys Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys. One gray night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more And Puff that mighty dragon, he ceased his fearless roar. His head was bent in sorrow-‐-‐-‐ green scales fell like rain, Puff no longer went to play along the cherry lane Without his lifelong friend Puff could not be brave So Puff that mighty dragon, sadly slipped into his cave.
66. Purple Stew
Making a purple stew, whip whip, whip whip, Making a purple stew, doobie doobie doo, Purple tomatoes and purple potatoes and, YOU, in my stew, (start with one person in the centre of the circle, when you sing “YOU”, that person points to someone else, who joins them in the circle. When you repeat, both people in the centre point to someone new – end with everyone together in the stew)
67. Quartermaster’s Store
There were beans, beans, trying on some jeans In the store, in the store There were beans, beans, trying on some jeans In the Cornermaster’s store Chorus:
My eyes are dim, I cannot see, I have not brought my specs with me! I have not brought my specs with me! Verses: .. peas, peas, with shocking dirty knees .. ham, ham dancing with the jam .. bread, bread that looks like it is dead .. grapes, grapes as hairy as big apes .. fingers, fingers, caught in automatic wringers .. ants, ants, crawling down your pants .. cars, cars, stuck in honey jars .. tables, tables, with legs like Betty Grable's .. trees, trees, full of honey bees .. rats, rats, as big as alley cats .. turtles, turtles, wearing rubber girdles .. pigs, pigs, doing the Irish jig .. ants, ants wearing rubber pants .. beans, beans wearing denim jeans .. ham, ham, an awful lot like Spam .. grapes, grapes wearing yellow capes .. clocks, clocks wearing woolen socks .. cakes, cakes made with soap flakes .. bats, bats wearing cowboy hats .. steak, steak that keeps us all awake .. lard, lard, they sell it by the yard .. bread, bread like great big lumps of lead .. kippers, kippers who go about in slippers .. cake, cake that gives us tummy aches .. beans, beans as as big as submarines .. gravy, gravy enough to sink the navy .. pots, pots as big as parking lots
68. Ravioli
(tune: Allouette) Ravioli, I like ravioli; ravioli, it's so good for me. Leader: Do I have it in my hair? Yes you have it in your hair. Leader: In my hair? OHHH ... Ravioli, I like ravioli; ravioli, it's so good for me. Continue with: chin, tie, shirt, skirt (pants), shoes, floor. Repeat the items mentioned with each verse sung.
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69. The Rooster Song
(verse is repeat after me, chorus is together) I had a chicken That wouldn't lay any eggs I had a chicken That wouldn't lay any eggs Chorus: Until that rooster came in my yard And caught that chicken right off her guard We're getting eggs now just like we used to Ever since that rooster came in my yard Other verses and their chorus: Bubblegum machine / gum -‐-‐ we're getting chick-‐lets Toaster / toast -‐-‐ we're getting Eggos Cow / milk -‐-‐ we're getting egg nog Teacher / tests -‐-‐ we're getting egg-‐sams Politician / win elections -‐-‐ we're getting chicken catch-‐a-‐Tory Dog / pups -‐-‐ we're getting pooched eggs Toy / sell toys -‐-‐ we're getting Lego Nylon / nylons -‐-‐ we're getting L'Eggs now Dumptruck / move dirt -‐-‐ we're getting egg-‐scavations Hospital / heal people -‐-‐ we're getting eggs-‐rays Health spa / keep me fit -‐-‐ we're getting eggs-‐ercise Farmer / grow beans -‐-‐ we're getting chick peas Hairdresser / dye hair -‐-‐ we're getting henn-‐aed Philosopher / ponder -‐-‐ we're getting eggs-‐istential Chemist / labs -‐-‐ we're getting hen-‐alytical Physicist / thermodynamics -‐-‐ we're getting hen-‐tropy Gardener / grow veggies -‐-‐ we're getting egg plants Fishwife / nag -‐-‐ we're getting hen pecked Company / trade goods -‐-‐ we're getting eggs-‐ports Spice rack / herbs -‐-‐ we're getting chick-‐ory Song that went on way too long -‐-‐ we're getting egg-‐sasparated
70. Row, Row, Row Your Boat
Consider doing this as a round, dropping or replacing the last letter, or in a circle formation tapping the knees. Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream, Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, Life is but a dream.
71. Sam Sam the Lavatory Man
Sam, Sam, the lavatory man, Chief inspector of the outhouse clan (stand straight like soldier & salute) He issues the tissues, the paper, and the towels (pass out 'items') He listens to the sounds of the rumbling bowels (hold hand to ear) Down, down, down below the ground (point down on down) Where all the little poopies are swimming around (swimming motion) There sits Sam, the lavatory man, Scooping up the poopies, Scooping up the poopies, Scooping up the poopies in his little tin can!
72. Say Why
Say why do we have to say goodbye? X3 Say why, my friend, say why. Say when will we ever meet again? X3 Say when, my friend, say when. Say where, and I’ll meet you right there. X3 Say where, my friend, say where. Say why do we have to say goodbye? Say when will we ever meet again? Say where and I’ll meet you right there, Say why, say when, say where.
73. Shaboom Shaboom
The flicker of the campfire, the wind in the pines The stars up in the heavens, the moon that shines A place where people gather, find friends of all kinds A place where all ones’ troubles are always left behind
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Shaboom Shaboom, Sha la la la la la la la la la la x2 So give me the light of the campfire, so warm and so bright And give me some friends to sing with, I’ll be here all night Love is for those who have found it, I’ve found mine right here Just you and me and the campfire, and the songs we love to hear Shaboom Shaboom, Sha la la la la la la la la la la x2
74. Shake Another Hand
Shake another hand, shake a hand next to ya, Shake another hand and sing along! Shake another hand, shake a hand next to ya, Shake another hand, and sing.... and sing this song! Chorus: Ah la la la la la le lu ya, Ah la la la la le lu ya! Ah la la la la la le lu ya, Ah la la la la le, alleluia! Other Verses: Touch another toe, pat another back, touch another nose, hug another friend...
75. Shaving Cream Song
I have a sad story to tell you It may hurt your feelings a bit Last night as I walked into my bathroom I stepped in a big pile of ... Shaving cream, be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen I think I'll break off with my girlfriend Her antics are queer, I'll admit Each time I say, "Darling, I love you" She tells me that I'm full of ... Shaving cream, be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen Our baby fell out of the window You'd think that her head would be split But good luck was with her that morning She fell in a barrel of ... Shaving cream, be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen
My old lady died in a bathtub She died from a terrible fit In order to fulfill her wishes She was buried in six feet of ... Shaving cream, be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen When I was in France with the army One day I looked inside my kit I thought i would find me a sandwich But the darn thing was loaded with ... Shaving cream, be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen And now folks my story is ended I think it is time I should quit And if anyone of you feel offended Push your head in a bucket of ... Shaving cream, be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen
76. Singing in the Rain
I'm singing in the rain, Just singing in the rain, What a glorious feeling, I'm happy again. Thumbs together. aratat aratat aratataa aratat aratat aratataa Repeat verse. After each verse add another body part: Elbows together Knees together Toes together Bum out Chin up Eyes crossed Tongue out
77. The Slaves of Job
This is a singing game and a real challenge. Each participant has and object. This can be a pop can, shoe, block of wood, small yogurt dish, etc. Items are passed to the right in time with the music. The direction may be reversed at the end of each round.
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The (pass the object on "slaves" and continue to pass the object) slaves of Job, Are playing pass and hold. Take it, hold it (hold on "hold it"), pass it along. (continue to pass the object) And while they were playing, They sang this simple song, (Now hold on to the item and move it back and forth.) Zigga zagga, zigga zagga, zigga zagga zong (pass the item on "zong") .
78. Sleepy Scouter
(tune: What Do You Do With A Drunken Sailor) What shall we do with a sleepy scouter, What shall we do with a sleepy scouter, What shall we do with a sleepy scouter, Early in the morning Chorus: Hoo-‐ray and up he rises, Hoo-‐ray and up he rises, Hoo-‐ray and up he rises, Early in the morning. Sock him with a pillow full of feathers ... Yell in his tent when it's time for breakfast ... Throw a glass of cold water on him ...
79. Tarzan
This is a repeat song Tarzan, Was swinging from a rubber band, Crashed into a frying pan, Now Tarzan Has a tan. Jane, Was flying in an areoplane, Crashed into a freeway lane, Now Jane has a pain, Now Tarzan has a tan. Cheeta, Was dancing to the beata, Crashed into the streeta, Now Cheeta is Velveta,
Now Jane has a pain, Now Tarzan has a tan. Tiff, Was going out wih Biff, Tiff took a whif of Biff, Now Tiff doesn't like Biff, Now cheeta is Velveta, Now Jane has a pain, Now Tarzan has a tan. Shamu, Was swimming in the ocean blue, Crashed into a red canoe, Now Shamu's gonna sue, Now Tiff doesn't like Biff, Now cheeta is Velveta, Now Jane has a pain, Now Tarzan has a tan.
80. The Grand Old Duke of York
Oh, the grand old Duke of York, He had ten thousand men. He marched them up the hill, And he marched them down again. And when they were up, they were up; And when they were down, they were down; And when they were only half way up, They were neither up nor down. Do this with your Beavers, marching on the spot. Repeat the verse, each time getting faster than the previous one.
81. The Bear Went Over the Mountain
The bear went over the mountain, The bear went over the mountain, The bear went over the mountain, To see what he could see. And all that he could see, And all that he could see, Was the other side of the mountain, Was the other side of the mountain, Was all that he could see.
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82. The More We Share Together
The more we share together, together, together. The more we share together, the happier we'll be. 'Cause your friends are my friends, And my friends are your friends. The more we share to together, the happier we'll be.
83. The Princess Pat
(repeat after me song) The Princess pat Lived in a tree She sailed across The 7 seas She sailed across The channel too, And took with her A rickabamboo A rickabamboo? Now what is that? It’s something made For the Princess Pat It’s red and gold And purple too, That’s why it’s called A rickabamboo Now captain Dan, And his loyal crew He sailed across The channel too, But his ship sank, And yours will too, Unless you take, A rickabamboo. A rickabamboo? Now what is that? It’s something made For the Princess Pat It’s red and gold, And purple too,
That’s why it’s called A rickabamboo.
84. The Second Story Window
Chorus The window, the window, The second story window, If you don’t know a nursery rhyme, We’ll throw you out the window, Mary had a little lamb, it’s fleece was white as snow, And everywhere that Mary went, she. . Threw it out the window! (repeat with different nursery rhymes – you can play in teams, and whoever can think of more rhymes wins. .)
85. The Twelve Days of Camp
On the first day of summer camp My mother sent to me: A box of oatmeal cookies. On the second day of summer camp My mother sent to me: Two T-‐shirts, And a box of oatmeal cookies. On the third day of summer camp My mother sent to me: Three pairs of socks, Two T-‐shirts, And a box of oatmeal cookies. Four woolen caps, Five underpants, Six postage stamps, Seven nose warmers, Eight Batman comics, Nine bars of soap, Ten Band-‐aids, Eleven shoestrings, Twelve bottles of insect repellent.
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86. The Wolves Went Hunting
(tune: The Ants Go Marching) The wolves went hunting two by two, Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting two by two, Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting two by two, The small ones came with old Baloo, And they all went padding on, With an eye, for game Hush, hush hush, hush Hush, hush hush, hush The wolves went hunting four by four Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting four by four Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting four by four They drank beside Waigunga’s shore And they all went padding on, With an eye, for game Hush, hush hush, hush Hush, hush hush, hush The wolves went hunting six by six Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting six by six Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting six by six The Banderlog and the pack don’t mix And they all went padding on, With an eye, for game Hush, hush hush, hush Hush, hush hush, hush The wolves went hunting eight by eight, Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting eight by eight, Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting eight by eight, The moon was high and they were late, And they all went padding on, With an eye, for game
Hush, hush hush, hush Hush, hush hush, hush The wolves went hunting ten by ten Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting ten by ten Crouch low, crouch low, The wolves went hunting ten by ten Avoiding the village and fields of men And they all went padding on, With an eye, for game Hush, hush hush, hush Hush, hush hush, hush
87. This Old Man
This old man, he plays one, He plays knickknack on my thumb. With a knickknack, paddy, give a dog a bone. This old man goes rolling home. Two-‐on my shoe. (Tap shoe) Three-‐on my knee. (Tap on knee) Four-‐on the floor. (Touch the floor) Five-‐on my hive. (Move hands as if brushing bees away from ears) Six-‐on my sticks. (Tap knuckles of other hand) Seven-‐up to Devon. (Shake fist) Eight-‐on my pate. (Tap top of head) Nine-‐on my spine. (Touch backbone) Ten-‐now and then. (Raise hands shoulder high, open and close fists in rhythm)
88. There Ain't No Flies on Us
There ain't no flies on us, There ain't no flies on us, There may be flies on some of you guys, But there ain't no flies on us. (Next group starts again even louder "Oh, yeah....")
89. There Was an Old Lady
There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. I don't know why she swallowed a fly. I guess she'll die.
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There was an old lady who swallowed a spider. That wiggled and jiggled and tickled insider her. She swallowed the spider to catch the fly. I don't know why she swallowed a fly. I guess she'll die. There was an old lady who swallowed a bird. How absurd! To swallow a bird! She swallowed the bird to catch the spider That wiggled and jiggled and tickled insider her. She swallowed the spider to catch the fly. I don't know why she swallowed a fly. I guess she'll die. Continue adding on verses: Cat . . . Imagine that! She swallowed a cat. Dog . . . What a hog! She swallowed a dog. Goat . . . She opened her throat and in walked a goat. Cow . . . I don't know how she swallowed that cow. There was an old lady, she swallowed a horse. She DIED of course!
90. There’s a Hole in my Bucket
Liza: Henry! Fetch me some water! Henry: There's a hole in my bucket dear Liza, dear Liza There's a hole in my bucket dear Liza, a hole. Liza: Well, fix it dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry, Well, fix it dear Henry, dear Henry, fix it. Henry: With what shall I fix it ... Liza: With a straw dear Henry ... Henry: The straw is too long ... Liza: Well, cut it dear Henry ... Henry: With what shall I cut it ... Liza: With an axe dear Henry ... Henry: The axe is too dull dear Liza ... Liza: Well, sharpen it dear Henry ... Henry: With what shall I sharpen it ... Liza: With a stone dear Henry ... Henry: The stone is too dry dear Liza ... Liza: Well, wet it dear Henry ... Henry: With what shall I wet it ... Liza: With water dear Henry ... Henry: In what shall I fetch it ...
Liza: In a bucket dear Henry ... Henry: There's a hole in my bucket, dear Liza ...
91. This Land is your land
Tune: http://kids.niehs.nih.gov/lyrics/thisland.htm This land is your land, This land is my land, From Bonavista To Vancouver Island, From the Arctic Circle, To the Great Lake waters, This land was made for you and me. roamed and I rambled And I followed my footsteps To the fir-‐clad forests Of our mighty mountains And all around me A voice was calling, This land was made for you and me. I followed your low hills And I followed your cliff rims, Your marble canyons And sunny bright waters. As the fog was lifting, A voice was saying This land was made for you and me. When the sun comes shining And I am strolling, And the wheat fields waving And dust clouds rolling, As the fog was lifting A voice was calling, This land was made for you and me.
92. Three Black Buzzards
(tune: Three Blind Mice — sorta) Three black buzzards. Three black buzzards. Three black buzzards ... sitting ... on a ... dead tree. But one flew away AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
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Two black buzzards. Two black buzzards. Two black buzzards ... sitting ... on a ... dead tree. But one flew away AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH (continue until you have no black buzzards) But one came back! REJOICE !!! One black buzzard. One black buzzard. One black buzzard ... sitting ... on a ... dead tree. But one came back! REJOICE !!! Two black buzzards. Two black buzzards. Two black buzzards ... sitting ... on a ... dead tree. (Continue until back up to three black buzzards) Your arms are this way: left hand is cupping right elbow. Right hand is up in the air showing the number of black buzzards. When you say "dead tree" you bring your right hand down onto your left arm and right back up again quickly.The pauses between the words "sitting on a dead tree" should vary ... of course the Beavers/adults will laugh because they are trying to do it at the same time as you!!
93. Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport
This is much more fun in hammed up Australian accents. The story is of an old Australian stockman that is dieing and gives instructions to his mates. Lyrics: I'm not gonna pull through, Blue; I'm not gonna pull through. I'm not gonna pull through, Blue, So this you gotta do ... Chorus: Tie me kangaroo down, sport Tie me kangaroo down. Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down. Watch me wallabies feed, Reed, Watch me wallabies feed. They're a dangerous breed, Reed So, watch me wallabies feed. Let me wombats go loose, Bruce, Let me wombats go loose. They're of no further use, Bruce. So let me wombats go lose. Keep me cockatoo cool, Lou, Keep me cockatoo cool. Don't go actin' the fool, Lou, Just keep me cockatoo cool. Take me koala back, Jack Take me koala back. He lives somewhere out on the track, Jack So, take me koala back. Mind me platypus duck, Bill Mind me platypus duck. Don't let him go running amuck, Bill Just, mind me platypus duck. Play your digeridoo, Blue Play your digeridoo. Keep playing 'til I shoot through, Blue Play your digeridoo. Tan me hide when I'm dead, Fred Tan me hide when I'm dead. So, we tanned his hide, when he died, Clyde And that's it hangin' on the shed.
94. Tom the Toad
(Tune = Oh Christmas tree) Oh, Tom the Toad, oh, Tom the Toad, Why are you lying on the road? Oh, Tom the Toad, oh, Tom the Toad, Why are you lying on the road? You did not see the truck ahead Now you've got the tracks on your head.
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Oh, Tom the Toad, oh, Tom the Toad, Why are you lying on the road? Oh, Sue the Skunk, oh, Sue the Skunk Why do you make my tires go thunk? Oh, Sue the Skunk, oh, Sue the Skunk Why do you make my tires go thunk? You did not look from east to west Now on the road there's such a mess. Oh, Sue the Skunk, oh, Sue the Skunk Why do you make my tires go thunk? Oh Sam the Snake, oh, Sam the Snake Why do you lie out there and bake? Oh Sam the Snake, oh, Sam the Snake Why do you lie out there and bake? You did not see the truck go by Now you look like a butterfly. Oh Sam the Snake, oh, Sam the Snake Why do you lie out there and bake? Oh Possum Pete, oh, Possum Pete There's nothing left but hair and feet. Oh Possum Pete, oh, Possum Pete There's nothing left but hair and feet. You thought you'd beat that bus across Now you look like a pile of moss. Oh Possum Pete, oh, Possum Pete There's nothing left but hair and feet. Oh, Froggie Fred, oh, Froggie Fred Why do you lie there stone-‐cold dead? Oh, Froggie Fred, oh, Froggie Fred Why do you lie there stone-‐cold dead? You didn't look as you jumped out, A ten-‐ton truck ran up your snout! Oh, Froggie Fred, oh, Froggie Fred Why do you lie there stone-‐cold dead?
95. Waldieotcha
Come on and waldieotcha, waldieotcha, Doddleedo, doodleedo, Waldieotcha, waldieotcha, Doddleedo, doodleedo, Simplest song, there's nothing to it, All you have to do is dooleedo it,
I like the rest but the part I like best goes, Doodlee, doodlee, do, woo!
96. Waltzing Matilda
Once a jolly swagman camped by a billabong, Under the shade of a coolibah tree, And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boiled You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me. Chorus: Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me, And he sang as he watched and waited 'til his billy boiled, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me. Down came a jumbuck to drink at that billabong, Up jumped the swagman and grabbed him with glee, And he sang as he shoved that jumbuck in his tuckerbag You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me. Chorus: Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me, And he sang as he shoved that jumbuck in his tuckerbag, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me. Up rode the squatter mounted on his thoroughbred, Down came the troopers -‐ one, two, three, Whose that jolly jumbuck you've got in your tuckerbag? You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me. Chorus: Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me, Whose that jolly jumbuck you've got in your tuckerbag? You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me. Up jumped the swagman, and sprang into the billabong, You'll never catch me alive said he, And his ghost may be heard as you pass by that billabong You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me.
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Chorus: Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me, And his ghost may be heard as you pass by that billabong, You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me.
97. We're at Camp
(tune: A Ram Sam Sam, Pizza Hut Song) We're at camp, camp camp, we're at camp, camp, camp Yippee, yippee, yippee, we're at camp, camp, camp We're at camp, camp camp, we're at camp, camp, camp Yippee, yippee, yippee, we're at camp, camp, camp. High five eh, high five eh Yippee, yippee, yippee, we're at camp, camp, camp High five eh, high five eh Yippee, yippee, yippee, we're at camp, camp, camp
98. Worm Song
Worms, worms, you gotta eat worms, Three worms a day keeps the nerds away. Oh, worms, worms, each more worms. Ym, yum, mmm, mmm, gulp more worms.
99. Yogi Bear
I know someone you don't know, Yogi, Yogi, I know someone you don't know, Yogi, Yogi Bear, Yogi, Yogi Bear, Yogi, Yogi Bear, I know someone you don't know, Yogi, Yogi Bear, Yogi has a little friend, Boo-‐boo, Boo-‐boo, Yogi has a little friend, Boo-‐boo, Boo-‐boo Bear, Boo-‐boo, Boo-‐boo Bear, Boo-‐boo, Boo-‐boo Bear, Yogi has a little friend, Boo-‐boo, Boo-‐boo Bear, Yogi has a girlfriend too,
Cindy, Cindy, Yogi has a girlfriend too, Cindy, Cindy Sue, Cindy, Cindy Sue, Cindy, Cindy Sue, Yogi has a girlfriend too, Cindy, Cindy Sue, They all have an enemy, Ranger, Ranger, They all have an enemy, Ranger, Ranger Smith, Ranger, Ranger Smith, Ranger, Ranger Smith, They all have an enemy, Ranger, Ranger Smith, They all live in Jellystone, Jelly, Jelly, They all live in Jellystone, Jelly, Jellystone, Jelly, Jellystone, Jelly, Jellystone, They all live in Jellystone, Jelly, Jellystone,
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CAMPFIRE STORIES
1. Bricklayers Accident Report Story
(This is a follow-‐up letter to a bricklayer's accident report requesting worker's compensation.) Dear Sir, I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block #3 of the accident reporting form. I put 'Poor Planning' as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient. I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-‐story building. When I completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later, were found to weigh 240 pounds. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley which was attached to the side of the building at the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to insure a slow descent of the 240 pounds of bricks. You will note on the accident reporting form that my weight is 135 pounds. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collarbone, as listed in Section 3, accident reporting form. Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley which I mentioned in Paragraph 2 of this correspondence. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of the excruciating pain I was now beginning to experience.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground-‐and the bottom broke out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, the barrel weighed approximately 50 pounds. I refer you again to my weight. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and severe lacerations of my legs and lower body. Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move and watching the empty barrel six stories above me, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope. The empty 50 pound barrel, weighing more than the rope I had let go, fell rapidly to earth, resulting in the two broken forearms and wrists when I raised by arms to protect myself. I hope this information satisfactorily fulfills your request for further information.
2. 'Twas the night before Christmas,
'Twas the night before Christmas, And down at the pond, All the Beavers were singing And carrying on. The stockings were hung On the branches with care, In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there. Beavers and Jones' were all fast asleep, No one was moving, Not one little peep. Beavers in their lodges and Jones' in their house,
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You couldn't even hear The tiniest mouse. When out in the woods There arose such a clatter, Keeo got up To see what was the matter. Out of the lodge He swam in a flash Right to the surface With hardly a splash. The moon was shining On new fallen snow, It looked just like midday With a soft glow. When what to Keeo's surprise Should suddenly appear But a red sleigh And eight reindeer. And there was a driver So lively and quick. Keeo knew in a moment, It must be St. Nick. With two little elves Also in sight, Santa must have Lots of work tonight. Now Dasher and Dancer, And Prancer and Vixen, On Comet, on cupid On Donner and Blitzen. Through the treetops, Watch the boughs, Dash Away through the night Hurry right now. Santa and friends came That night on the fly, Came to the Jones' and Beavers From way up high. He landed his sleigh
In the woods on the ground To fill all the stockings And not make a sound. A bundle of toys He had flung on his back, He looked like a peddler As he opened his sack. His elves checked the beavers To see if they were asleep And then checked the Jones' So they wouldn't cheat. Santa saw Keeo And gave him a wink, So Keeo wasn't exactly Sure what to think. They finished their work And sprang back to their sleigh And soon they were once Again on their way. Keeo returned to The lodge to sleep And wait for the Beavers To wake up for their treats. But he heard Santa say As he drove out of sight, Merry Christmas to all And to all a good night.
3. Purple Gorilla Story
When I was younger, I had an old pick-‐up that didn't run very well. I was constantly needing to repair it, but I couldn't afford anything better. One evening, I was driving home from a camping trip out in the mountains and it started sputtering which was a good sign it would soon stop running. Luckily, there was a farm up ahead so I pulled in and stopped. I knocked on the door and asked the farmer if I could use his phone to call for help. Unfortunately, he didn't have a phone way out there. So, I asked him if I could spend the night in his barn and maybe use his tools to fix my truck in the morning. Now, you know how farmers are -‐
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always willing to help folks out and all -‐ so he said that would be just fine. He even invited me to have dinner before turning in for the night. We had a nice dinner of beef, potatoes, and beans and then he showed me to the barn so I could lay out my sleeping bag on the straw. It was a real nice barn and I was sure I'd get a good night's sleep. But, just as he was leaving, he said there was one thing he figured I should know about. So, he tool me over to a pile of straw and pushed it out of the way, revealing a trap door in the floor. He grabbed the iron ring on the door, and pulled it up -‐ creeeeeeeeeeek. There I saw stairs heading down into the dark and I followed the farmer down the stairs -‐ squeek, squeek, squeek, squeek. At the bottom of the stairs there was a large oak door with an iron bolt. The farmer pushed the bolt across -‐ clunk -‐ and pulled the door open -‐ creeeeeeeeeek – and walked through. Down a narrow, dark tunnel we encountered a steel door with a solid crossbar holding it closed. The farmer lifted the crossbar – groooooooan -‐ and struggled to pull the door open -‐ uuumph, grunt -‐ and we walked on. A few yards further on was a clear door made of bullet-‐proof glass 12 inches thick. It had a combination lock and I watched as the farmer opened it -‐ 12-‐23-‐7 -‐ click, click, click and then swung the door open -‐ swooooosh. Past this door was a huge cage made of 3-‐inch round titanium bars. But, that wasn't what caught my eye. What I saw was the huge monster inside the cage. It was gigantic! It was covered with purple fur! And, it was asleep. The farmer said, 'This is what I needed to show you. This is my purple gorilla and you've got to promise me, I mean really promise me, that you will NOT touch him!' Well, I thought that was about the most ridiculous thing I'd ever heard. Of course, I'm not going to touch a gigantic purple gorilla! And, so I promised him. And, I thanked him for showing my his secret. Then, we made our way back to the surface. He closed the glass door -‐ swooosh – and spun the lock -‐ click, click, click. He closed the steel door -‐ uumph, grunt -‐ and lowered the crossbar -‐ groooan. He closed the oak door -‐ creeeeeek -‐ and slid the bolt
in place -‐ clunk. We climbed the stairs -‐ squeek, squeek, squeek, squeek and then dropped the trapdoor closed -‐ ker-‐thump! Then, he spread straw back over the trapdoor to hide it. Well, I was tired so I laid out my sleeping bag and 'hit the hay' (ha-‐ha) and the farmer went back to his house. But, I just couldn't stop thinking about that purple gorilla. What a magnificent creature! I wonder why the farmer didn't want me to touch it? Hmmmm, it was asleep so what harm would there be? Finally, my curiousity got the best of me and I couldn't fight it any longer. I jumped up and went over and brushed the straw from the trapdoor. I grabbed the iron ring on the door, and pulled it up -‐ creeeeeeeeeeek. I went down the stairs -‐ squeek, squeek, squeek, squeek. I pushed the bolt on the oak door open -‐ clunk -‐ and pulled the door open -‐ creeeeeeeeeek -‐ and walked through. I raised the crossbar on the steel door -‐ groooooooan -‐ and struggled to pull the door open -‐ uuumph, grunt -‐ and walked on. I came to the 12-‐inch thick bullet-‐proof glass door and opened the combination lock -‐ 12-‐23-‐7 -‐ click, click, click and then swung the door open -‐ swooooosh. I walked up to the huge cage made of 3-‐inch round titanium bars and gazed at the purple gorilla that was still fast asleep. I reached out my hand. I softly touched his fur. And, he immediately jumped up and let out a blood-‐curdling roar, turning and staring a me with huge, blood-‐red eyes! Needless to say, I tore out of there as fast as I could! When I got to the glass door, I could hear the gorilla tearing at the bars of the cage. I turned around in time to see him ripping and bending the bars and forcing his way through. I closed the glass door -‐ swooosh -‐ and spun the lock -‐ click, click, click -‐ and ran on. Just as I was closing the steel door -‐ uumph, grunt -‐ I heard the gorilla hit the glass door and it shattered into millions of shards of glass. I lowered the crossbar -‐ groooan – and ran on. I slammed the oak door closed -‐ creeeeeek -‐ just as the steel door exploded off its hinges. I slid the bolt in place -‐ clunk -‐ and scurried up the stairs -‐ squeek, squeek, squeek, squeek. Just as I was dropping the trapdoor -‐ ker-‐thump -‐ the oak door disintegrated into slivers no bigger than a toothpick. I didn't bother spreading straw over the trap door -‐ instead I ran to my truck hoping to escape. As I opened
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my truck's door, straw and wood flew out the door of the barn as the trapdoor was thrown from its hinges and the gorilla leapt out into the barnyard. He saw me as I jumped in the truck and tried to get it started. I turned the key and could see the gorilla running across the yard toward me. The truck didn't start. I tried again, and this time the engine turned over and came to life. Just as I was putting the truck in gear, the purple gorilla reached the door, grabbed the handle and ripped the door completely off the truck. I stomped on the gas, the engine raced, but nothing happened -‐ the gorilla had lifted the truck off the ground and I was helpless. As I sat there helplessly, that enormous purple gorilla reached into the cab, stretched out his giant hairy hand towards me, grabbed my arm, and said, 'Tag, you're it!'
4. Gloop Maker Story
There once was a sailor returning to his ship. Just as he approached the edge of the dock, he slipped and fell into the water between ship and dockside. As he hit the water, the ship began to swing toward the harbor wall, and he would have been crushed to death had not a little man, with great presence of mind, thrown a rope and hauled him to safety. 'Whew, thanks!' said the sailor. 'You saved my life. Tell me, is there anything I can do for you in return?' 'Well actually,' said the man, 'there is something. I'd dearly like to work aboard ship and, in fact, I was just on my way to look for a job when I saw you in the water. If you could put in a word for me. I'd be greatly obliged.' 'Done!' said the sailor. He took the little man on board and tracked down the Petty Officer. 'This man saved my life just now, and he really would very much like to have a job on the ship.'
'Well, I don't know,' said the Petty Officer. 'We have a full ship's complement, but I'll certainly put in a word on his behalf to my superior. What does he do?' 'I'm a Gloop Maker,' said the little man eagerly. Not wishing to appear ignorant in front of his subordinate, the Petty Officer didn't want to ask what exactly a Gloop Maker was, so he went to see the Chief Petty Officer. 'This man saved the life of one of my seamen,' he told the Chief. 'Do you think we could find him a job aboard? He's a Gloop Maker.' Not wishing to appear ignorant in front of his subordinate, the Chief Petty Officer asked the Warrant Officer, who asked the Sub-‐Lieutenant and so on, all the way through the chain of command until the request reached the Captain. After congratulating the little man, the Captain, not wanting to appear ignorant, named him ship's Gloop Maker and ordered the Supply Officer to provide whatever materials were necessary for work to commence. The little man asked for a strong block and tackle fitted up on the afterdeck, a small stool, a hammer and chisel, a portable furnace, a big lump of iron, a few pounds of copper and several more of silver. As the ship sailed, the little man set his stool alongside the chunk of iron, lit the furnace and began to melt down the copper and silver. Then, with much hammering and chiseling, he began to add blobs of copper and curlicues of silver to the sides of the lump of iron. Each day crewmembers stopped and stared at the wondrously strange thing taking shape at the ship's stern. But not wishing to appear ignorant, nobody asked the Gloop Maker what he actually was making. 'Coming along nicely,' said the captain as he made his daily rounds. 'Any idea precisely when it will be :ah: ready?' 'Oh yes,' said the man. 'On July 15 at 14:00hours. That's when it'll be ready, and I'd like the crew assembled on deck at that hour, if you please, sir.'
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And so, the great day came, the men assembled and the Gloop Maker put down his hammer and chisel. Proudly he stood back and indicated that the block and tackle should be lowered onto his masterpiece, whose copper and silver curlicues gleamed in the sun. Carefully he directed it to be lifted from the deck and swung round until it hung over the sea at the ship's stern. 'Ready, steady, go!' he cried, and he cut it free. And, as it fell into the deep blue waters of the Atlantic, it went ... 'GLOOP!'
5. Dark Suckers Story
For years, it has been believed that electric bulbs emit light, but recent information has proved otherwise. Electric bulbs don't emit light; they suck dark. Thus, we call these bulbs Dark Suckers. The Dark Sucker Theory and the existence of dark suckers prove that dark has mass, is heavier than light, and is faster than light. First, the basis of the Dark Sucker Theory is that electric bulbs suck dark. For example, take the Dark Sucker in the room you are in. There is much less dark right next to it than there is elsewhere. The larger the Dark Sucker, the greater its capacity to suck dark. Dark Suckers in the parking lot have a much greater capacity to suck dark than the ones in your room. As it is with all things, Dark Suckers don't last forever. Once they are full of dark, they can no longer suck. This is proven by the dark spot on a full Dark Sucker. A candle is a primitive Dark Sucker. A new candle has a white wick. You can see that after the first use, the wick turns black, representing all the dark that has been sucked into it. If you put a pencil next to the wick of an operating candle, it will turn black. This is because it got in the way of the dark flowing into the candle. One of the disadvantages of these primitive Dark Suckers is their limited range. There are also portable Dark Suckers. In these, the bulbs can't handle all the dark by themselves and
must be aided by a Dark Storage Unit. When the Dark Storage Unit is full, it must be either emptied or replaced before the portable Dark Sucker can operate again. Dark has mass. When dark goes into a Dark Sucker, friction from the mass generates heat. Thus, it is not wise to touch an operating Dark Sucker. Candles present a special problem as the mass must travel into a solid wick instead of through clear glass. This generates a great amount of heat and therefore it's not wise to touch an operating candle. Also, dark is heavier than light. If you were to swim just below the surface of the lake, you would see a lot of light. If you were to slowly swim deeper and deeper, you would notice it getting darker and darker. When you get really deep, you would be in total darkness. This is because the heavier dark sinks to the bottom of the lake and the lighter light floats at the top. That is why it is called light. Finally, we must prove that dark is faster than light. If you were to stand in a lit room in front of a closed, dark closet, and slowly opened the closet door, you would see the light slowly enter the closet. But since dark is so fast, you would not be able to see the dark leave the closet. Next time you see an electric bulb, remember that it is really a Dark Sucker.
6. The Medicrin Story
Long ago, before Gamecubes, before Playstations, even before Atari, there were nasty, vile monsters roaming the land. In those days, a few brave, strong men made their living by protecting common people from these beasts. This is a story about one such man named Erik and the adventure he had. There was a small village on the edge of a wide prairie, next to a very thick forest that led up into the cold, dark mountains. In these mountains lived the dreaded Medicrin. The Medicrin would stalk down from the mountains in the dead of night, sneak into the village, and snatch a sleeping villager. He would take the poor soul away and eat him for breakfast. This happened
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every week so you can imagine the villagers became quite tired of it. The terrified villagers called a meeting, and decided to hire the greatest hero around -‐ Erik the Brave! Erik rode into town on his trusty steed, entered the city hall, and listened to the story the villagers told of the monster that attacked at night each week. When they were finished, Erik told them he would have a plan in the morning and he went to his hotel room. In his room, he consulted his Great Hero's Book of Vile Monsters, and found the chapter about the Medicrin. He learned that Medicrins stink like rotten eggs. He learned they have 6 fingers with long claws. He learned they never brush their teeth. He learned they have very good noses. And he learned they love to eat human flesh, but even more, they love to eat Loons. So, early the next morning, actually very, very early the next morning, Erik hunted high and low, near and far, to find a loon. He finally found one just before breakfast, captured it, tied it up, and brought it back to the village. He then told the villagers his plan. He had them dig a pit that was 20 feet deep (because the Medicrin was 9 feet tall) and 10 feet around. While they were digging, Erik tied a big rock to the leg of the loon, so it could not fly away. When the pit was finished, just about a half hour before sunset, Erik tossed in the rock, and of course the loon went in too. Then, he told the villagers to go to their homes while he waited for the Medicrin. Erik jumped in the bushes and waited with his great broadsword with which to slay the Medicrin. That night, the Medicrin snuck into the village . . . It smelled the loon . . . It came closer to the pit . . . But then it smelled DANGER, and it ran off. On the way out of the village, it grabbed one of the villagers for a snack. Needless to say, the villagers were not happy. Some demanded their money back, others wanted to throw Erik into the pit. After calming the villagers, the next day, Erik again consulted his Great Hero's Book of Vile Monsters, and learned more about the Medicrin. He
learned it wore the same underwear for 3 weeks in a row. He learned it could not sing at all, but enjoyed listening to opera music. But, most importantly, he learned that Medicrins love sugar more than anything else in the world, even turnip-‐spinach surprise! So, Erik used some of the money the villagers had given him and rode his trusty steed to the next village, bought all the sugar he could carry and returned -‐ this took two days because villages were far apart in those days. The next day, he rode to a different village and bought their sugar. The next day, he went to yet another village. It had now been a week and the Medicrin was due to come again this night. Erik gathered all this sugar and threw it into the pit. The loon, that was still stuck down in the pit, had not eaten in a week now and was extremely hungry. As fast as Erik could throw the sugar in the pit, the loon ate it up. It ate ALL the sugar! Erik was struck with panic, and ran to and fro trying to figure out what to do next, but night had fallen, and the Medicrin would be there soon, so Erik crossed his fingers, and hoped for the best. That night, the Medicrin came . . . It smelled the loon . . . It came closer to the pit . . . It smelled sugar . . . It came closer to the pit . . . It smelled DANGER and turned to run away. But, that smell of sugar was just too overpowering. It couldn't resist. The Medicrin ran up and dove down into the pit. And, it was trapped! Brave Erik leaped from behind the bush, raised his sword, and jumped down onto the Medicrin, driving his sword into its neck, and slew it. Which just goes to show: A loon full of sugar helps the Medicrin go down.
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7. The Most Popular Man Story
One day at work, Bob was bragging that he knew everyone that was anyone. His boss got tired of his boasting and decided to call him on it. He said, 'OK Bob, how about Clint Eastwood? Do you know him?' 'Oh sure ', said Bob. 'He and my Dad shoot pheasant together and he's a great guy.' 'OK, prove it', said his boss. 'Let's fly out to Hollywood and you can introduce me.' 'Great!', said Bob. And so they did. They took a taxi to Mr. Eastwood's estate, Bob knocks on the door, Mr. Eastwood opens it and shouts, 'Bob! Hey, great to see you! You and your friend come on in and have lunch.' Bob's boss was impressed, but still skeptical. When they left after lunch, he said, 'That was a coincidence that you knew Clint Eastwood. How about President Bush?' 'Sure, I know him', replied Bob. So, they fly off to Washington, DC and head to the White House. As they are touring the grounds, Mr. Bush sees Bob and comes right over saying, 'My gosh, Bob, I haven't seen you in a couple years. Come on in, have some coffee and let's catch up.' After a couple hours, Bob and his boss are escorted off the White House grounds and Bob asks his boss, 'Well, do you believe me now?' His boss, shaken and a bit bewildered, but still not completely convinced says, 'I'll believe you if you show me you know one more person -‐ the Pope.' 'Certainly', says Bob, 'I've known the Pope since I was just a little kid. Let's fly over to Italy.' So, off to Rome they fly and join a mass of people in Vatican Square waiting to catch a glimpse of the Pope. Bob says, 'There's no way I can get the Pope's attention with all these people here. How about if I go talk to one of the guards I know and then I'll come out on the balconey with the Pope to prove to you I know him.' Bob's boss waits as Bob heads off into the crowd. About 15 minutes later, the Pope emerges on the balconey and right beside him is Bob waving to the crowd. When Bob returned a few minutes later to where he had left his boss, there were paramedics there surrounding his boss laying on the ground -‐ he had
had a heart attack. Bob rushes up and asks what happened. His boss looks up at him and replies, 'I was doing ok when you came out on the balconey. But then the guy next to me asks 'Hey, who's that up on there on the balconey with Bob?"
8. Cremation of Sam McGee Story
There are strange things done in the midnight sun By the men who moil for gold, And the arctic trails have their secret tales That would make your blood run cold. The northern lights have seen queer sights, But the queerest they ever did see Was the night on the marge of Lake LaBarge I cremated Sam McGee. Now, Sam McGee was from Tennessee Where the cotton blooms and blows. Why he left his home in the south to roam 'Round the pole, God only knows. He was always cold, but the land of gold Seemed to hold him like a spell, Though he'd often say, in his homely way, He'd sooner live in hell. On a Christmas day we were mushing our way Over the Dawson Trail. Talk of your cold:through the parka's fold It stabbed like a driven nail. If our eyes we'd close, then the lashes froze 'Till sometimes we couldn't see. It wasn't much fun, but the only one To whimper was Sam McGee. And that very night as we lay packed tight In our robes beneath the snow, And the dogs were fed, and the stars o'erhead Were dancing heel and toe, He turned to me, and 'Cap', says he, 'I'll cash in this trip, I guess, And if I do, I'm asking that you Won't refuse my last request.' Well, he seemed so low I couldn't say no, And he says with a sort of moan, 'It's the cursed cold, and it's got right hold
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'Till I'm chilled clean through to the bone. Yet 'ta'int being dead, it's my awful dread Of the icy grave that pains, So I want you to swear that, foul or fair, You'll cremate my last remains.' A pal's last need is a thing to heed, And I swore that I would not fail. We started on at the streak of dawn, But, God, he looked ghastly pale. He crouched on the sleigh, and he raved all day Of his home in Tennessee, And before nightfall, a corpse was all That was left of Sam McGee. There wasn't a breath in that land of death As I hurried, horror driven, With a corpse half hid that I couldn't get rid Because of a promise given. It was lashed to the sleigh, and it seemed to say, 'You may tax your brawn and brains, But you promised true, and it's up to you To cremate those last remains.' Now, a promise made is a debt unpaid, And the trail has its own stern code. In the days to come, 'though my lips were dumb, In my heart, how I cursed the load. In the long, long night by the lone firelight While the huskies 'round in a ring Howled out their woes to the homeless snows Oh, God, how I loathed the thing. And every day that quiet clay Seemed to heavy and heavier grow. And on I went, though the dogs were spent And the grub was getting low. The trail was bad, and I felt half mad, But I swore I would not give in, And often I'd sing to the hateful thing, And it hearkened with a grin. 'Till I came to the marge of Lake LaBarge, And a derelict there lay. It was jammed in the ice, and I saw in a trice It was called the 'Alice May'. I looked at it, and I thought a bit, And I looked at my frozen chum, Then, 'Here', said I, with a sudden cry,
'Is my crematorium.' Some planks I tore from the cabin floor And lit the boiler fire. Some coal I found that was lying around And heaped the fuel higher. The flames just soared, and the furnace roared, Such a blaze you seldom see. Then I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal And I stuffed in Sam McGee. Then I made a hike, for I didn't like To hear him sizzle so. And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled, And the wind began to blow. It was icy cold, but the hot sweat rolled Down my cheek, and I don't know why, And the greasy smoke in an inky cloak Went streaking down the sky. I do not know how long in the snow I wrestled with gristly fear. But the stars came out, and they danced about 'Ere again I ventured near. I was sick with dread, but I bravely said, 'I'll just take a peek inside. I guess he's cooked, and it's time I looked', And the door I opened wide. And there sat Sam, looking calm and cool In the heart of the furnace roar. He wore a smile you could see a mile, And he said, 'Please close that door. It's fine in here, but I greatly fear You'll let in the cold and storm. Since I left Plumbtree down in Tennessee It's the first time I've been warm.' There are strange things done in the midnight sun By the men who moil for gold, And the arctic trails have their secret tales That would make your blood run cold. The northern lights have seen queer sights, But the queerest they ever did see Was the night on the marge of Lake LaBarge I cremated Sam McGee.
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9. Ghost Train
I was a railway fireman back in those days, working on the CPR line in Alberta. I did a hard day's work and earned me a fair wage. I was young then, and my pretty little bride was just setting up housekeeping in the little cottage that was all we could afford. Life was good, and I thought everything would continue rolling along that way. Then came that fateful day in May of 1908. I was working nights that month, and my buddy Twohey was the engineer. We were about three kilometers out of Medicine Hat when a blazing light appeared in front of the engine. It was another train on a collision course with us. Twohey yelled at me to jump, but there was no time. The light was right on top of us. I thought we were dead. Then the oncoming train veered off to the right and ran passed us, its whistle blowing and the passengers staring at us through the windows. But there was only a single track in that stretch of hills, and it was the one we were on. I looked over at the shrieking, rumbling Ghost Train and saw that the wheels were not touching the ground! Well, we were mighty spooked by the incident. Twohey decided to take some time off from engineering and began working in the yard; but I kept working the night shift as a fireman, not wanting some Ghost Train to drive me away a job I enjoyed. A few weeks later, I was stoking the fire for an engineer named Nicholson when we heard the shrill whistle blast through the calm night air. We were on the same single track just outside of Medicine Hat, and the brilliant light of the Ghost Train burst out of nowhere, blinding us. Nicholson gave a shout of terror and I thought my heart would stop. As before, the Ghost Train veered off to the right at the last possible second. I saw it race passed us on tracks that did not exist, its passengers staring curiously at Nicholson and I from out of the windows. That did it. I wasn't about to go back on the tracks after that. I did yard work for the rest of the month of May and a few weeks in June. Finally, I decided that enough was enough, and I gritted my teeth and resumed my role as fireman.
I was firing up an engine in the yard one evening in early July when the report of an accident came in. The Spokane Flyer and a Lethbridge passenger train had a head-‐on collision on the single track three kilometers outside of Medicine Hat, on the exact spot where the Ghost Train had appeared. The Lethbridge locomotive had derailed and its baggage car was destroyed. Seven people were killed in the accident, including the two engineers. One was my buddy Twohey, and the other was Nicholson.
10. Vinder Viper Story
Notes: The punch line should be delivered as a little old German man with such an accent. Years ago, a man inherited a house from his great uncle who died in the war. The house sat on a hill outside of town in the next state and rumors were told that it was haunted. The man traveled to the town to inspect the house and found that it was a wonderful old mansion in great condition, but very, very old. So, he decided to move in and enjoy his inheritance. A couple weeks after he moved in, late at night, the phone rang. When he answered it, a voice said, "I am the Vinder Viper. I will be there in 2 weeks!" and then it hung up before he could say anything. This really shook the man. The next day, he searched the Internet under 'snakes' for 'vinder viper' but found nothing. A week past with no concerns and again, late one night, the phone rang. "I am the Vinder Viper. I will be there in 1 week!" and hung up. This made the man quite nervous, not knowing what a vinder viper was. He asked around the town, and no one had ever heard of any such viper. Four days later, late at night, the phone rang. "I am the Vinder Viper. I will be there in 2 days!" The man is getting much more concerned now. The next night, the phone rang. "I am the Vinder Viper. I will be there tomorrow!" Needless to say, the man is just plain scared now.
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The next evening, the phone rang. "I am the Vinder Viper. I will be there in 1 hour!" The man tries to leave, but his car battery is dead. Nearly an hour later, the phone rang. "I am the Vinder Viper. I will be there in 2 minutes!" The man runs around locking all the windows and doors and calls 911. The police are on their way. Soon, there was a knock at the door. The man opened the door a crack and asked, "Is that the police?" "No, I am the vinder viper. I come every month to vipe your vindows."
11. Some Special Pig Story
I remember when I was younger, down the road lived old farmer Palmire. Mr. Palmire was a pretty good farmer for those parts and had chickens, cows, vegetables, the whole works. I'd occasionally help him with his farm chores to earn a bit of spending money. One day, while forking hay out of his barn, I noticed a pig walk around the corner of the barn. Strange thing was, this pig had three artificial legs. He kind of hobbled along and stood over at the feed trough and had his fill. When I was done with my work, I asked old Palmire about that pig. Why would anyone give a pig an artificial leg -‐ especially three of them! Mr. Palmire told me, 'Well, that's not no ordinary pig. That there pig is darn special. One day, my son Jimmy was swimming in the creek when he got stuck under some tree roots. That old pig jumped right in the water, dove under, yanked those roots out, and drug Jimmy to shore! Now, that's one special pig!' I said, 'That's amazing. But, what about his artificial legs?' 'Well,' continued Mr. Palmire, 'another time, my daughter Tilly was walking down yonder through the trees when a stray cougar jumped out of a tree and was going to attack her. Just then, this here pig came tearing through the brush, barreled right into that cougar and chased him clean out of the valley. Most amazing thing I ever heard of a pig doing.'
'Wow!' I replied. 'But, what about the legs?' 'Just this spring, that pig saved my wife when she got locked in the smokehouse. That pig somehow got the door unlocked and got my wife out before she cooked to death.' 'Alright!', I interrupted, 'I realize that pig is special, but why does it have three artificial legs?' 'Well, a pig like that is just too special to eat all at once!'
12. Ballad of Johnny O'Dell
Wild are the tales of the Pony Express And most of them are true if I don't miss my guess. But wildest of all tales that they tell Is that of fearless young Johnny O'Dell. Johnny was little, but he was a man Whom none could outride, outshoot or outplan. Ride, he could ride anything that could run And could outdo any man with a gun. Back in those days there were men in the West And Johnny O'Dell was as good as the best. Only the bravest could carry the mail Through terrible dangers that haunted the trail. Dangers there were on the night I describe, For Johnny encountered an Indian tribe. Blackie, his horse, gave a new burst of speed. No Indian pinto could equal that steed. Bullets and arrows whizzed over his head As into the foe and right through them he sped. Outlaws had raided the station ahead The horses were stolen, his partner was dead. Onward went Johnny over the trail. For such was the life when you carry the mail Rivers they forded for bridges there were none While crossing one stream he was stopped by a gun. "Halt!" cried a man on the bank of the creek-‐ As together they fired by the light of the sun. Still lay the stranger whom Johnny had met,
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For all that I know he is lying there yet. Onward went Johnny into the West, As a spot of crimson appeared on his vest. Together they continued their hazardous ride, The powerful horse with the brave man astride. Into the town of Red Gulch did they go, As blotches of blood marked their way through the snow. This was the end of the perilous trail Through bullets, and arrows; through blizzards and hail. Johnny dismounted and cried with a wail, "Oh, Darn it all, I've forgotten the mail!"
13. Shaggy Dog Story
Way up in the very north of Canada, there lived a trapper and his dog. His name was Sam -‐ the trapper, not the dog. The dog's name was Rover and he was an extremely shaggy dog -‐ I mean REALLY shagy. Out in the wilderness, Sam did not get visitors nor much mail. But, he did have a newspaper subscription to help stay current with the world. Once a month a plane flew over and dropped out Sam's copy of the newspaper from the closest town which was 98 miles away. Today just happened to be newspaper day so Sam picked up the paper, went to his cabin, made a cup of hot chocolate and sat down to read. After reading the entire paper, Sam noticed an interesting ad on the back page. It said that way down south in Minnesota an eccentric multi-‐millionaire was offering half his fortune if only someone would bring him his dying wish, a really shaggy dog. Carefully he tore the item from the newspaper and placed it in his pocket. Whistling for Rover, he hurriedly packed for his journey. It would be a long haul through some of the worst of the winter months, but he could do it! And so, with packsack and snowshoes, and Rover on a makeshift lead, he headed south.
(At this point you should add your own horrific tales of icy crevasses, blizzards, starvation, polar bears, thin ice, thick snow: anything to make the journey as difficult and as courageous as possible.) Weeks passed as Sam and Rover, footsore, frostbitten and weak from lack of food, fought their way nearer and nearer to the millionaire's deathbed. Would they find his house? Would he have found another dog? Would he still be alive? Urgently, Sam asked at each trading post or small homestead he passed. "My word, that's a shaggy dog you have there!" folks remarked whenever he stopped. "That's the shagiest dog I've ever seen!" "Is there a dog under all that shaggy hair?" Finally, Sam and Rover reached the mansion of the multi-‐millionaire and stopped at the huge oak-‐studded front door. Raising a weather-‐beaten hand, Sam tugged at the wrought iron bell-‐pull. Distantly, the bell clanged. The door opened and a butler stood in the doorway. "I've come about the shaggy dog ad in this newspaper," said Sam, carefully drawing out the clipping from his pocket and offering Rover's lead to the butler. Silently, the butler withdrew with the dog. Sam listened to his footsteps cross the huge hall and climb the massive circular staircase. He waited patiently on the doorstep, dreaming of the luxury soon to be his. At last the butler reappeared. Solemnly, he handed back the dog. "Not shaggy enough," he said, and shut the door
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14. The Emerald Ring (Scary Story)
There was once a very rich young man that fell in love with a beautiful woman. They dated and were engaged. For an engagement gift, he gave her an exquisite emerald ring appraised at $135,000. She loved her ring and wore it all the time. The man also had a new house built for them to live in once they were married. The morning of their wedding day, in the church before the ceremony, the woman suddenly became very sick so the bridesmaid called 9-‐1-‐1. Paramedics arrived only 15 minutes later, but it was too late, she had already died. The husband-‐to-‐be was heart-‐broken and distraught with grief. He told the priest to hold the funeral that very afternoon instead of the wedding ceremony and bury her the next day. He then locked himself in the attic of his new home and would talk to no one. The priest that was to perform their wedding agreed to lead the funeral but, as it turns out, he was greedy, very greedy. He agreed to do the funeral but demanded extra pay for his time, taking advantage of the rich young man's grief and wealth. Of course, the families agreed since they had no options on such short notice. All the wedding guests came to the funeral where the bride was wearing her wedding dress and her big emerald engagement ring. Everyone marveled at how beautiful she was, even in death, and how sad it was that the groom was taking it so hard. After the short service, all the guests left and the coffin was sealed. The next day, it would be placed in the ground. That night, while resting in his room above the church, the priest could not stop thinking about the beautiful young woman's emerald ring. It sparkled and twinkled in the lights and would now never be seen again -‐ what a waste. What a waste of so much money! Finally, he could stand it no longer and decided to take the ring for himself since no one would ever know.
He pried up the lid of the coffin and tried to pull ring off her finger, but it would not budge. He twisted, yanked, and pulled with no luck. Frantically, he ran to the kitchen and returned with a butcher knife. He hacked off her finger and then pulled off the ring. What an amazing ring! As he reached to close the lid of the coffin, the dead woman's eyes popped open, her mouth twisted into a grin, and she reached towards him with both hands, the severed ring finger dripping dark blood. The priest screamed, dropped the ring, and ran up to his room where he hung himself from the rafters because he knew this ghost was after him for stealing its ring. Little did he know that the woman was really alive and was only going to thank him. She had not actually died, but had slipped into a deep coma. The trauma of cutting off her finger had shocked her back to consciousness, saving her from being buried alive the next day. Wearing her wedding dress, the young woman walked through the night to her new home and knocked and rang the bell but no one answered. Circling the house, she saw a light on in the attic window so she threw a rock at it. The young man opened the window and peered down. He saw his bride and said, "Begone, ghost! Leave me in peace and stop torturing me!" But, his bride said, "No, I am no ghost. Look, I am bleeding. Now, get down here right now or I surely will die before morning!" The man ran downstairs and brought her inside. The doctor was called and they were married (by a different priest) the next day and lived happily ever after.
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15. Ghost with One Black Eye Story
Notes: Quite a few different versions of this and it is similar to 'Ghost of Able Fable'. Could be done as a skit. My great-‐grandfather ran a hotel downtown back in the days when people were tough and times were hard. Folks traveling through town would need a place to wash off the road dust, eat, and sleep a spell. His hotel turned a nice little profit and many nights during the summer, every room would be filled -‐ that is every room except one! As the story goes, this one room was haunted. Seems that way back when the hotel was first built a man got in a fight over a girl down in the bar. He took a tremendous left cross right in his left eye and it knocked him out -‐ just one punch. Folks hauled him up to his room to sleep it off, but he never woke up -‐ died right there in the room. Since then, no one was able to sleep in that room cause of the ghost. One day, a barmaid needed a room. Grandpappy said, "Sorry, miss, I've only got one room left and its haunted." "That's ok, I'll take it," replied the barmaid. While getting ready for bed, she heard, "I'm the ghost with one black eye. I'm the ghost with one black eye." Scared the bejeebers out of her! She ran downstairs in her nightgown, right out the front door, and was never seen again. A few years later, a cowboy rented the room. Grandpappy said it was haunted, but he said, "Shoot Heck, pardner, I rope bulls and don't spit out my chaw juice. I ain't afeared of no ghost." But, as he was taking a bat, he heard, "I'm the ghost with one black eye. I'm the ghost with one black eye." That cowboy gulped, choked on his chaw, his face turned purple, his eyes bulged out, he jumped out of the bath, covered his private parts with his hat, and skidaddled out of town like a jackrabbit across the prairie.
The room sat vacant for more years until a U.S. Marshal drove into town in a new fangled automobile instead of on a horse. He asked Grandpappy for a room, but this was the busy season and guess what -‐ there was only one room left and Grandpappy explained it was haunted. "That's just fine," said the Marshal. "I've killed 37 men, been shot 12 times, bit by a rattlesnake twice, and gargle with turpentine every morning. I'm not too concerned about some silly ghost." So, he went up to his room. But, no sooner had he closed the door when he heard, "I'm the ghost with one black eye. I'm the ghost with one black eye." He turned and smashed right through the door, leaped the entire flight of stairs, picked up his automobile, and ran out of town screaming and hollering at the top of his lungs. [Make up any number of characters, getting tougher each time...] A couple years after that, in the early 1900s, a family was passing through town on a family vacation. Any idea how many rooms were left? NOPE -‐ there were TWO rooms left! But, the mother and father wanted their own room and their young son could have his own. Grandpappy told them about the ghost, but the boy just said, "Wow! A REAL GHOST? Cool!" The mom and dad went to their room and the boy opened his up. He took a bath, got ready for bed, and hopped in. Just then, he heard, "I'm the ghost with one black eye. I'm the ghost with one black eye." And, the boy hollered back, "Well, I'm a Cub Scout and you don't scare me! If you don't shut up, you're gonna be the ghost with TWO black eyes!"
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16. Nail in the Attic Story
When I was a young boy, there was a strange old man in our neighborhood named Frank Samuels. We all called him Frownin' Frank because he was awful ornery and none of us every saw him smile. He had a mangy old dog he called King that always used other people's yards for a bathroom. Every morning and every evening, Frownin' Frank would take King for a walk and let him do his business in someone's yeard. I figure King was Frank's only friend. One evening, while we were playing in the street, Frank came walking down the road, hollering, 'King! King! here boy!' He hollered at us, 'You boys seen my dog?' We hadn't and we told him so. Frank just kept on frownin' and yelling for his dog. About an hour later, he came back looking pretty depressed and headed for his home. He hadn't found King. Frank looked all around his yard, in the shed out back, under the house and in the bushes in the back yard -‐ no sign of King anywhere. Finally, he went inside, took off his coat and shoes, and sat down in his chair. He knew he had to call the dog pound. Just as he picked up the phone, he heard a noise like scratching and whining upstairs. He put down the phone and quietly walked up the stairs in his socks so he could still hear the noise. When he got to the top, the sound came from still higher up -‐ in the attic! He climbed the stairs up to the attic door, making no sound in just his socks. He stood outside listening, but he didn't hear a thing. Then he opened the door, stepped in, and -‐ (Now SCREAM LOUDLY!) At this point, don't say anything more. Just sit there as if you have finished the story. Somebody will ask, 'Why did he scream?' You reply, 'You'd scream too if you stepped on a nail in your bare feet!'
17. Red Sloppity Lips
A boy was riding his bike along an old road and had become lost. He was trying to find his way back to a gas station to get directions when it began to rain. He pulled his jacket up over his head to help keep the rain away, but it began to rain harder. Then it began to thunder and lightning, so he knew that he must find shelter quickly. Up ahead he saw an old abandoned house, so he ran onto the porch. Certainly nobody would mind. But the wind began to blow and blew the door right open. The wind blew so hard, that it blew the rain onto the porch soaking the boy even more. So he went inside to get out of the rain. The house was very large and though it was abandoned, dirty, full of cobwebs and in need of some repair, it kept the boy dry. A big gust of wind blew in the door and then back out again, slamming the door shut. The boy tried to open the door, but the rain had caused the door to swell, wedging it in the door frame when it slammed. He could not open it. Just then, he heard a voice call out, 'Do you know what I do with my red sloppity lips and my long green fingers?' Next to the door was a large, green hairy monster with huge red lips, pointed fangs, and gangly legs and arms with very long green fingernails. The boy panicked and ran down the hall. The monster followed. Again, he heard the monster say, 'Do you know what I do with my red sloppity lips and my long green fingers?' as he followed him down the hall. The boy ran up some stairs at the end of the hall. And the monster pursued him. The monster was getting closer, and he heard the monster say louder, 'Do you know what I do with my red sloppity lips and my long green fingers?' The boy ran away from the monster down the hall at the top of the stairs and into a room at the end of the hall, closing the door behind him. But he heard loud footsteps coming down the hall. And he had run into a room with no windows, so he hid in the closet. The bedroom door crashed open and again he heard the monster say even louder, 'Do you know what I do with my red sloppity lips and my long green fingers?'
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The boy tucked himself into a corner of the closet and hid as best as he could. The closet door opened wide and the huge hairy monster stood before him. Again, so loud that it hurt the boy's ears, the monster once again said, 'Do you know what I do with my red sloppity lips and my long green fingers?' The boy shook as he answered with fear in a quiet voice 'no'. The monster said, 'Then I'll show you!' BLBLBLBLBLBLBLBL (Put your fingers to your lips and strum them across your lips while you make a 'b' sound. Cross your eyes when you do this if you can. This should result in the desired silly effect.)
18. Job at the Zoo
In high school, I needed money. I was able to drive, had a girlfriend, and like to go out with my friends. My folks didn't have much money and I needed to pay my own way. I had already done jobs working at restaurants and grocery stores and wanted to try something more interesting. While searching around, I stopped at the zoo. As it turned out, the zoo director liked my style and said he had an interesting job that he felt I could handle. We walked through the back alleys and tunnels of the zoo that most people never see until we got to the gorilla cage. But, it was empty. The director told me that their gorilla named Kong had caught a bug and was in quarantine for the next week. Kong was getting old and they were even now shopping around for a replacement since Kong just sits on a treebranch holding onto a rope all day. When the crowds started arriving on the weekend, they'd be disappointed to have no gorilla since everyone enjoys the gorilla exhibit, even a boring old gorilla. The director said he had a gorilla suit I could wear if I would be interested in sitting on the branch for 4 hours at a time so the people would at least have something to look at. It sounded good to me, not the usual high school job, so I told him I would.
The next day I went to the zoo, put on the gorilla suit and climbed into the cage. I sat on the branch holding the rope and soon there was a crowd of children pressing their faces to the bars. It didn't take long for me to start getting bored, so I would scratch my armpits, thump my chest, and twirl the rope. About an hour passed and I began to really get into this gorilla stuff. I would grab the rope and swing across the cage. The kids thought it was great so I started swinging higher and higher. In the next cage there was a lion and he was becoming irritated by my antics and began to pace his cage and roar. I kept swinging and started to swing to the lion's side of the cage and would use my feet to push off of his bars. I could really swing out far and he roared even louder. It was actually pretty fun and the kids were really enjoying the show. All of a sudden I missed the bars, flew through, and dropped right into the lion's cage! I landed on my back and was stunned but immediately got up and ran to the front of the cage to the croud, screaming "Help me, help me, I'm not who you think I am!" Just as I yelled, the lion jumped on my back and knocked me to the ground. His head was at my neck and I was sure I'd never make it to graduation. Then he whispered in my ear, "Shut up stupid, or you'll get us both fired".
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19. Bloody Finger
There once was a family a long time ago that went on vacation. A mother, father, Brother, Sister and last but not least a small baby. After a long day of sight seeing and traveling the family decides to check into a local hotel. They'd checked out all the surrounding areas and the hotels were all full. Finally they come to the last one and are desperate! They enter in to find that the hotel is full! Desperate, the father tells the clerk "We'll take anything you have..just Anything!! Please Mr. don't you have a room for us?" The clerk felt really bad for the family and told the father "Sir, we do happen to have just one room left. We don't normally let people stay in it though. It's haunted. Everyone that has stayed always disappearsin the middle of the night without so much as a goodbyeor even paying their bill!" The father says " Great!! We'll take it! You see, I don't believe in all that ghost rubbish anyhow!" He takes the key and they go off into the old hotel room. Seeing as how the family was so tired from their travel, the family decided to order out for pizza. The pizza finally arrives and the mother gets the pizza and sits it on the counter. The little baby was so hungry!! He watched that pizza the whole time! Mom announced "Everyone it's time to wash up for dinner!!" So off to the bathroom Mom goes to wash her hands for dinner. She enters into the bathroom, turns on the sink and a horribly scary voice can be heard... "BLOOOOOODYYYYYYYY FINNNNNNNNGGGERRRRRR" It scares the mom so badly that she jumps out the bathroom window and runs away! Never to be seen again! After a few minutes the father starts to wonder where the mother is...so he tells the kids he'll go find out so that they can take their turn in the bathroom and then eat the pizza. He goes into the bathroom, turn on the sink and hears that same scary voice "BLOOOOOOODYYYYYY FIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGERRRRR" He gets so scared that he runs to the window, jumps out never to be seen again. After a few minutes the brother starts to wonder where Mom and Dad went. He goes into the bathroom to check on them. He walks over to the sink, turns on the water and hears "BBBBLLLLLLOOOODDDDYYYY
FIIINNNNNNGGGERRRRR" (getting louder and louder each time it's said) He runs to the window and jumps out, never to be seen again. The sister starts to wonder where everyone has gone to. She goes into the bathroom to check things out. Once in the bathroom she decides to wash up. She walks to the sink, turns on the water and hears a scary voice "BBBBLLLLLLOOOODDDDYYYYY FFIIINNNNGGGGEEERRRRR" (getting louder each time it's said) She's so scared that she runs to the bathroom window and jumps out, never to be seen again. Ok...so all that's left is the baby,.....he's pretty upset that everyone has left him alone and he can't even reach that delicous pizza himself! He's going to tell them exactly what he thinks about it too! JUST as soon as he can find them. He crawls into the bathroom to see where everyone has gone. First he opens the door...nothing...he crawls over to the sink...still nothing....."hmm" he thinks to himself...THEN he hears it! The scary scary voice..."BLLLLOOODDDDYYY FIIINNNNNGGERRRRR" The baby, frustrated, looks around ..."BLLLLOOODDDDYYY FIIINNNNNGGERRRRR" (much louder this time!) the baby just sits there ,..."BLLLLOOODDDDYYY FIIINNNNNGGERRRRR (VERY loud) Finally the baby says just as loud and very frustrated "AWWWW Stick A BANDAID ON IT!" he shouts!
20. Farmer Jones And The Big Quake
On a bright and sunny morning in May, Farmer Jones went out to plow his fields. He led old Bessie, his plow horse, out of the barn and hitched her up to the plow. The aroma of newly plowed earth wafted behind him as he produced a ruler straight furrow across the field. Suddenly his reverie was broken as a strong earthquake struck. As the ground shook beneath his feet, he fell to his knees. His plow fell over almost on top of him, as did old Bessie. But, beyond the fence in the next field, the bull remained standing. Farmer Jones stood, dusted himself off, and grabbed the reins to right old Bessie. He pulled the plow upright, hitched up the horse again and began to plow. Shaken somewhat by the strange experience, the furrow began to zig a little from side to side as Bessie pulled the plow blade through the fertile ground. After only a few seconds a strong aftershock rolled through the farm. Again it was strong enough to knock Farmer Jones from
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his feet, topple his plow, and with a loud protest, drive old Bessie to the ground. This time the farmer looked back across the field toward the house and noticed that the goats and cows had fallen over, too .... But, beyond the fence in the next field, the bull remained standing. Shaken and puzzled, Farmer Jones picked himself up and dusted off his overalls. Righting the horse and plow, he quieted old Bessie as best he could. She seemed more rattled by all this that he was. As strong as the two earthquakes were, Farmer Jones could not understand how the bull remained standing. So he started toward the other field to see if he could find out what was going on with the bull. As he crossed the field, and climbed through the fence into the field where the bull stood, a very strong aftershock struck -‐-‐ much worse than either of the preceding earthquakes -‐-‐ putting him on the ground flat on his face. Looking behind himself he saw Old Bessie and the plow had fallen down again. Down toward the house the goats and cows had fallen down again. In fact, this aftershock was so strong that the chickens had fallen over as well. The front porch on the farmhouse had crashed down and the walls looked as though they would not last much longer. But, only a few feet away from him, the bull remained standing. He picked himself up, dusted off, and without bothering to right either horse or plow, marched toward the bull. Shaken to the core, puzzled and angry, Farmer Jones shouted, demanding to know why everything on the farm had been knocked over by the earthquakes and the bull had remained on his feet. Much to Farmer Jones' astonishment, the bull replied, "We bulls wobble, but we don't fall down!"
21. A House of Terror
The car finally gave out. Jeff hit the dashboard in frustration. It was bad enough that the car had to break down, but at night, in the rain, in the middle of God knows wherever he was, it was a fitting end to his bad week. The week had seen his wife le aver him, taking the kids with her. He had been demoted at his job, and was now forced to go back on the road as a salesman. Now this had happened, and things weren't going to get any better anytime soon. Jeff decided
that he might as well try to find a way out of this mess. He considered waiting in his car for another car to come by and help him. The road wasn't often used though, and that might take hours, so Jeff decided to first walk down the road to see if there were any other choices. After walking f or a half hour in the pounding rain, Jeff finally came across an old house in the woods. Now Jeff had seen enough horror movies to make him turn back, but the rain alone was enough to override his sense of fear and trepidation. He walked up the winding road up to the door. They looked to be very old and not kept up well, and Jeff wondered if anyone even lived there anymore... He knocked on the door, and to his surprise, it was answered rather quickly. An older man, looking to be in his late 70s, asked him what he wanted. Jeff explained his situation and asked if the man had a phone or someway to help. The old man said he was wary of travelers, but decided that Jeff looked honest enough, and let him use his phone. Jeff thanked him, and asked his name. He said his name was Joseph Palmer, and told Jeff the number of the nearest garage. Jeff made his way through to the phone, noticing that the house looked about as old inside as it did outside, and was surprised that there was even a phone at the place. He called the garage, but they said there was nothing they could do until the morning, and they would meet him at noon at his car. Mr. Palmer offered Jeff the guestroom to sleep in for the night. Jeff was a bit wary at spending the night in such a spooky old house, but decided that the walk back in the rain and sleeping in the car couldn't be much safer than staying at the house. He accepted, and was shown to the room. The house was adorned with antique everything, not a piece of furniture seemed to have been purchased in at least the last 60 years or more. Mr. Palmer showed him the room, and bided him good night. The man was nice, but the whole situation still left Jeff unnerved. He just tired to tell himself that he had watched far too many horror movies as a child. The bedroom had a canopy bed, one old lamp, a single window, and a red carpet. The house was eerily quiet as Jeff laid himself down on the bed. Quiet...except for a creek here, and a thump there. By now, Jeff's imagination had him too paranoid to sleep, as he heard Mr. Palmer outside the room, walking up and down the hallway outside. Up he went, and down he went. Then, the footsteps stopped, right
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outside his room. Jeff waited, yet nothing happened. A half hour passed, and yet h e heard nothing except the rain beating outside, and the wind howling as the storm blew on. Finally sleep slowly overcame Jeff, even with his nervousness heightened. Slowly, his eyes closed, though he thought he could almost hear something scratching at hi s door... Jeff awoke, the stormed had passed, and daylight was shining through the window curtains. Happy that all his nervousness was for nothing; Jeff got out of bed, and checked his watch. He had slept in until 11:20, and had to leave quickly before the garage e people got to his car. Leaving the room, he was greeted by Mr. Palmer. Palmer asked him if he had slept well. Jeff replied that he had, though he had trouble falling asleep. Palmer laughed and asked if he was afraid of the old house at night in the middle of nowhere. Jeff admitted that maybe, he was a bit afraid, but he felt silly for it now. He thanked Palmer, and said he had to leave quickly to get to his car. He turned to leave, when suddenly, something banged his head and everything went quite dark. .. When Jeff came to, he was tied to a chair in the basement. The place reeked of horrible smells. Mr. Palmer walked up to him, with a large knife in his hand. Jeff screamed and tried to free himself, but only tired himself out. He looked up in horror at Mr. Palmer, and asked him why he was doing this, and why now. Palmer answered that last night, he would have been nervous, full of fear, and ready for any attack Palmer would do. No, that wasn't the right time, everyone expects attacks at night. But during g the morning...people are more relaxed and the fear is low, making them blind to any chance of harm. Jeff asked him again, why was he doing this, what was he going to do with him and said someone, like the garage people, would find out what happened. Mr. Palmer said that mishaps happen on highways at night, mainly during storms, so hardly anyone would even think twice as to why he was gone. If anyone actually did start asking questions...Palmer said he had ways to discourage that kind of activity...As for why he was doing this, Palmer simply said that Jeff need not worry about that, in fact, he need not worry about anything anymore...Jeff looked into Palmer's eyes as he walked towards him, eyes were completely black, and tried to scream...
22. 10 Holes
Once in a little village not that far from here, there was a problem. Animals had started dying off, one by one. In the morning their owners would see them lying outside with 10 holes in their chest. The people thought it was the work of their neighboring town (insert name). Then, one night a man by the name of Fred was closing his store for the night. It was very late, and he was anxious to get home to his family. He shut off all the lights, then closed the door with a satisfying click. As he turned around to go to his car he saw a dark shape in the distance. He stood still trying to make out what it was. As it got closer, Fred turned to go. It was the last move he ever made. The next day they found him with 10 holes in his chest. This made the town quite worried. They were scared of more people getting killed. So, one night two brave brothers, John and Jacob went out to get rid of the problem. They each took knives, and walkie talkies. They said good-‐bye to their father, and kissed their grandmother on the way out. The two boys decided to split up. One would go by the site of the murder, and the other would wander the streets. If one was attacked they could use their walkie talkie to contact the other. So they set off, keeping a close eye on the shadows. Nothing seemed to be happening. It was a calm night, and it seemed like they would get home safely. But then suddenly John heard a crackling in the bushes behind him. He tried to call his brother, but it was too late. The figure leaped out of the bushes and tackled him, gouging his chest with its nails. Luckily Jacob heard the commotion, and rushed to help him. He leaped through the air and cut off the creatures right hand. The creature screamed and ran. Jacob took John to the hospital, and they bandaged him home. The doctors called them heroes, and finally they got home at 6 that morning. Only their grandmother was up, so they said good morning, then went back to bed. Neither of them noticed she was missing her hand.
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23. Girl at the Underpass
Not long ago, but before interstate highways ran around towns and cities, a young man left Greensboro late one night to drive to his old home in Lexington. At that time, just east of Jamestown, the old road dipped through a tunnel under the train tracks. The young man knew the road well, but it was a thick foggy night in early summer and he drove cautiously, especially when he neared the Jamestown underpass. Many wrecks had taken place at that spot. He slowed down on the curve leading to the tunnel and was halfway through it when his eyes almost popped out of his head. Standing on the roadside just beyond the underpass was an indistinct white figure with arm raised in a gesture of distress. The young man quickly slammed on his brakes and came to a stop beside the figure. It was a girl, young, beautiful, resplendent in a long white evening dress. Her troubled eyes were glaring straight toward him. Obviously she was in need. He jumped from the car and ran around to where she stood motionless. "Can I help you?" "yes." Her voice was low, stranger. I want to go home. I live in High Point." He opened the door, and she got in. As they drove off, he said, "I'm glad I came by. I didn't expect to find anyone like you on the road so late at night." "I was at a dance." She spoke in a monotone. "My date and I had a quarrel. It was very bad. I made him drop me back there." He tried to continue the conversation, but she would say nothing more until they were into High Point. "Turn at the next left," she said. "I live three doors on the right." He parked before a darkened house, got out of the car and went around to open the door for her. There was no one there! He looked into the back seat. No one! He thought she might have rushed up the sidewalk and out of sight. Confused and undecided about what to do next, he thought it only reasonable to find out if she had entered the house. He went up the steps and knocked on the door. No one came. He knocked again. There
was no sound anywhere. After a third knock, through the side panes a dim light appeared from the pitch-‐black hallway. Finally the door was opened by a white-‐haired woman in a night robe. "I brought a girl to this house," he explained, "but now I can't find her. Have you seen her? I picked her up out on the highway." "Where?" "At the Jamestown underpass. She told me she had been to a dance and was on her way home." "Yes, I know," said the woman wearily. "that was my daughter. She was killed in a wreck at that tunnel five years ago tonight. And every year since, on this very night, she signals a young man like you to pick her up. She is still trying to get home." The young man turned from the doorway, speechless. The dim light in the house went out. He drove on to Lexington, but never has he forgotten, nor will he ever forget, the beautiful hitchhiker and how she vanished into the night.
24. On Washington Rock
The dream was so vivid, she didn't realize at first that it was a dream. The party was crowded, the guests cheerful, the food delicious. Then a rumor began to circulate among the guests. The Devil was coming to the party. The Devil was on the way. She didn't pay much attention at first. Until a hush came over the crowd. Turning to see what it was, she saw a tall, handsome blond man standing in the doorway greeting his hostess. Around her, the murmurs began. It was the Devil. He had come. She watched out of the corner of her eye as the Devil made the rounds of the room. He looked so ordinary, it was hard to believe he was the Devil. Then he came to her group. As soon as he joined them, she knew the rumor was true. This was not someone to be trifled with. Frightened, she grabbed for a Bible her hostess had left lying on a nearby end-‐table and threw it at the Devil. For a moment, their eyes locked. The Devil's eyes
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were full of ferocious anger, terrible evil, and malevolent malice directed right at her. She thought she was dead. Then she woke, and lay trembling in her bed with the light on until dawn. The next morning was the end of term. Her parents and younger sister helped her clear out her dorm room and packed the car. It was dusk before they settled into their seats for the two-‐hour drive home. They talked excitedly as they drove towards their home in New Jersey, interrupting each other often, contradicting themselves and laughing. It was good to be together again. They were fifteen minutes from home when they left the highway. Her father turned onto Washington Rock Road that led up the mountain, through the C-‐bend around the Washington Rock State Park and then down the other side of the mountain. As they drove up the steep hill, a noisy motorcycle tail-‐gated them, trying to pass even though the road was windy and narrow. Finally the hill grew so steep that the driver was forced to slow down and eventually, they pulled away from him entirely. The car reached the top of the hill and started around the long C curve that took them through one end of the park. The park was dark and still. The whole family automatically looked to their right, out over the gorgeous view of the New York City skyline. They all saw the small park cart, sitting next to the road just inside the park boundary. It was parked directly underneath the only streetlight, where you couldn't fail to see it. And inside the vehicle.... She started trembling fiercely. Inside the vehicle was a tall, handsome blond man with eyes full of ferocious anger, terrible evil, and malevolent malice. It was the man from her dream. The man everyone said was the Devil! The tension in the car was palpable. She had mentioned her dream to no one. But her parents and her sister all felt the evil pulsing from the still figure in the cart. No one spoke as they drove past the man.
Suddenly, the engine gave a strange cough. Her father gunned the motor, once, twice in a silent, desperate battle to keep moving. She gripped her hands together, praying silently as she stared at the figure opposite their car. The engine caught again and her father pressed down hard on the accelerator. Then they were past the man and roaring away from the park and towards the downward slope of the mountain. She was sweating profusely, unable to stop shaking. She looked back out the window at the man in the park, and saw the motorcycle come roaring at last to the top of the hill. It drove half-‐way around the C-‐bend and as it drew opposite the figure in the cart, she heard the engine of the motorcycle cough. And then stall. And then the park was out of view and they were riding silently towards home, not daring to speak until they were safely indoors. She often wondered what happened to the man on the motorcycle.
25. La Mala Hora
My friend Isabela called me one evening before dinner. She was sobbing as she told me that she and her husband Enrique were getting divorced. He had moved out of the house earlier that day and Isabela was distraught. I called my husband, who was on a business trip in Chicago, and he agreed that I should go stay with Isabela for a few days to help her during this difficult time. I packed a small suitcase and got right into the car. It was late, and it would take me at least four hours to drive from my home to Sante Fe. Isabela was expecting me to arrive around midnight. As I traveled down the dark, wet highway, I kept feeling chills, as if someone or something were watching me. I kept looking in the rear view mirror, and glancing into the back seat. No one was there. Don't be ridiculous, I told myself, wishing fervently that I was home in my bed instead of driving on a dark, rainy highway. There was almost no traffic, and I heartily wished that I would soon reach Sante Fe.
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I turned off the highway just before I reached the city, and started down the side roads that led to Isabela's house. As I approached a small crossroads, I saw a woman step into the street directly in front of my car. I shrieked in fright and slammed on my brakes, praying I would miss her. The car shuddered to a halt, and I looked frantically around for the woman. Then I saw her, right beside my window, looking in at me. She had the face of a demon, twisted, eyes glowing red, and short pointed teeth. I screamed as she leapt at my window, her clawed hands striking the glass. I put my foot down on the accelerator and the car leapt forward. For a few terrible moments, she ran along side the car, keeping up easily and striking at me again and again. Then she fell behind and in the rear view mirror I saw her growing taller and taller, until she was as large as a tree. Red light swirled around her like mist, and she pointed after me, her mouth moving though I could not make out the words. I jerked my attention back to the road, afraid what might happen to me if my car ran off the street. I made it to Isabela's house in record time and flung myself out of the car, pounding on her door frantically and looking behind me to see if the demon-‐faced woman had followed me. Isabela came running to the door and let me in. "Shut the door! Shut it!" I cried frantically, brushing past her into the safety of the house. "Jane, what is wrong?" she asked, slamming the door shut. She grabbed my hand and led me into the living room. I sank onto the couch and started sobbing in fear and reaction. After several minutes, I managed to gasp out my story. Isabela gasped and said: "Are you sure you were at a crossroads when you saw her?" I nodded, puzzled by her question. "It must have been La malhora," Isabela said, wringing her hands. "The bad hour?" I asked.
"This is bad, Jane. Very bad," Isabela cried. "La Malhora only appears at a crossroads when someone is going to die." Ordinarily, I would have laughed at such a superstition, but the appearance of the demon-‐woman had shaken me. Isabela got me a cup of hot cocoa, brought my luggage in from the car, and sent me to bed. She was so concerned for me that she didn't once mention the divorce or Enrique. I felt much better the next morning, but I could not shake the feeling of dread that grew within me all day. Neither of us mentioned La Malhora, but we were both thinking of her when I told Isabela that I wanted to go home. Isabela insisted on accompanying me. I flatly refused to drive after dark. I was afraid I would see the demon-‐woman again when I passed the crossroads. We left the next morning, and we hadn't been home more than twenty minutes when a police car pulled into my driveway. I knew at once what it meant, and so did Isabella. The officers spoke very gently to me, but nothing could soften the news. My husband had been mugged on the way back to his hotel after dinner last night. His body had not been found until this morning. He had been shot in the head and was killed instantly.
26. Abiyoyo
Once upon a time, there was a beautiful little village in the mountains. It had beautiful little houses with beautiful little picket fences, and beautiful little people who lived in them. Most of the time, the people had peaceful, calm lives. There was one thing that disrupted the lives of the villagers -‐-‐ the giant Abiyoyo. Abiyoyo was a terrible ugly giant. He was so dirty he had toadstools growing out of his ears and his nose, and there was a forest growing under his fingernails. He was so smelly his stink went a mile around him in every direction. With one burp, he could knock down a house. With one fart, he could level a whole farm. Abiyoyo had no friends, and he was always angry. He spent all his time storming through the countryside and
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villages yelling: I AM ABIYOYO! I AM ABIYOYO!, and causing destruction everywhere he went. One day in the beautiful little village, the villagers started to smell something terrible, and they knew Abiyoyo was about a mile away, so they rushed to get everyone inside their houses. They started hearing in the distance "I am Abiyoyo! I am Abiyoyo!," and they started barring up their windows and doors to protect everyone as the giant came through town. Except for two people, who had no house. There was a man and his son who had just arrived in the village. They were musicians, and travelled the country playing for their food and sleeping wherever they could. The man played the violin, and the boy sang and danced. Because they were from far away, they didn't know what the smell and the shouting meant so they hadn't had a chance to run inside anyone's house, and were left alone in the street when Abiyoyo came into the village. Abiyoyo stormed into town yelling I AM ABIYOYO! I AM ABIYOYO! and started ripping up the beautiful little fences, and banging on the roofs of the beautiful little houses. He started burping and farting and ruining the farmer's fields. The man and his son watched in fear until Abiyoyo turned around and looked straight at them. They were very afraid, and didn't know what to do. Then the man took out his violin, and because he couldn't think of anything else to do, he started to play. Abiyoyo looked confused -‐ he had never heard music before. Then, the son started to sing, and he sang the first thing that came into his head: Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyo. Abiyoyo had completely stopped his rampage to watch the two musicians. So this time, the son sang louder: Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyo. The villagers had been listening in their houses, and started coming to the windows to see what was
happening. This time, they joined in on the song, and the son started to dance: Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyo. Then the most amazing thing happened -‐-‐ Abiyoyo himself started to sing and dance along with the son. And when he danced, the toadstools fell out from his ears and his nose. The dirt under his fingernails fell out. He even stopped smelling so terrible. And everyone came out of their houses to dance with the musicians and Abiyoyo: Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyo. They danced all the way out of the village together. Now that beautiful little village still exists, far away in the mountains. There are still beautiful little houses, with beautiful little fences, and there are beautiful little people living in them. The people still have peaceful, calm lives. They're not afraid of any giants anymore -‐ and sometimes off in the distance, you can hear a hint of a song on the breeze: Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyoyo, Abiyo.
27. Akki Takki Tonga
The story is of Nanook who travels by Kayak (very tippy) to go on his quest for manhood by hunting the great white polar bear. He must enter the Kayak very carefully (the more you ham it up, the better the punch line at the end). To paddle the kayak, you cross your arms in the shape of the paddles and sing the chant: Akki-‐takki-‐tonga, akki-‐takki-‐tonga Aye-‐ipsi-‐day-‐ispsi-‐day Akki-‐takki-‐tonga, akki-‐takki-‐tonga Aye-‐ipsi-‐day-‐ispsi-‐day You can do as many of these as you feel neccessary to get to the iceburg with the bear. When looking for the bear, balance becomes paramount and the overhanded and twist is required. (Keep track as it's a two way trip).
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Epsi-‐cola-‐minniwanka Epsi-‐cola-‐minniwanka Once the bear is located, the rifle must be placed over the bow of the kayak, emphasis played continually to balance. Depending on your crowd, you may wish to explain that the ways of the north dictate that the village will use all parts of this bear and only the very old are chosen for the hunt. Pulling the bear onto the kayak may also be exaggerated with one two handed heave for the front. Then a single handed pull combined with a nose pinch for the hind quarters. Travelling back to the village will require the very same "akki-‐takki's" as it did to get there (the kids will have been counting, take my word on that one). Just before your last paddle for shore, have the group give a big wave to their family on the shore. Last akki-‐takki will be performed with a swimming motion instead of the paddling.
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CAMPFIRE CHEERS
Alka Seltzer: Plot, Plop, Fizz, Fizz, Oh what a relief it is. Apollo: Shout: Countdown, 10 – 2 !! BLASTOFF! Then with your hand gain orbit and even out. Then say, “BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP.” Archery: Mimic shooting an arrow, then call out, “Bull’s Eye!” Artillery: Begin slowly with the flats of your palms and increase in speed: then slow down until finally the last time the hands are not brought together. Barber Shop: Make a razor sharp motion on the palm of your left hand with your right hand, turning your right over with each stroke. Don’t forget the barber’s flourishes. Bear: Growl like a bear four times, turning halfway around each time. Bee: Put arms straight out and pretend to fly, while going “Buzz-z-z-z, Buzz-z-z-z.” Big Hand: Leader says, “let’s give them a big hand”. Everybody in the audience holds up one of their hands with the palm up. Big Sneeze: Cup hands in front of nose and sneeze in hands. Having nowhere to put it, wipe your hands in your hair. Big thumb: Hold out a hand at arms length; make a fist with the thumb up. Variation: Add, “GREAT JOB!!” Black Powder: Pretend to have black powder in your hand. Pour powder down the barrel. Stamp it down, raise the gun and fire saying, “Click, BANG!!” *** Blast-off: Start counting backwards from 6 to 1. Bend the knees a little more on each count until you are in a squatting position. Then, while saying, “BLAST OFF!”, just straighten up in the air. Bow and Arrow: Make motion as if shooting an arrow and say, “Zing, Zing, Zing.” Pretend to release an arrow with each zing. Variation: Slowly draw arrow from quiver on your back. Place arrow against string of bow, pull back, release and say “pffft.” Cub Scout: Rip, Rap, Rap! Rip Rap, Ree! Loyal Happy Cub Scouts are We! *** British Rank: Be Prepared! Be Prepared! Shout! Shout! Shout!
Tenderfoot! Second Class! First Class Scout. Broken Arm: Stick arm out in front of you with the lower arm and hand dangling. Swing lower arm and hand back and forth in a limp manner. Broken Trolley: Pull the bell rope as if ringing a bell, repeating “CLUNK, CLUNK, CLUNK.” Bull: Make bull horns with fingers while shouting “El Toro, El Toro!” Call the Hogs: SOOOOOOO EEEEEEE, SOOOOOOO, EEEEEEE!!!!!!! PIP, PIG, PIG PIG!!! Canada (Scouts): C-A-N-A-D-A- Scooooooouts Canada!! Can of Applause: Cheer and applaud as cover is removed from can and become quite as lid is replaced. Carpenter: Pretend to be holding a hammer in one hand and a nail in the other. Start pounding the nail with the hammer while saying, “Band, Bang, Ouch.” Cat’s Meow: You’re the cats MeeeeOOOOW!!! Centipede: Group stands and yells: Ninety-nine THUMP!! Ninety-nine THMP!! Ninety-nine THMP!! This wooden leg is murder!!! Cheerio: Cheerio-Cheerio-Cheerio. Christmas Bells: Pretend to hold a bell rope, then get the left side of the audience to say “DING” on the down stroke and the other side of the audience to say “DONG” on the upstroke. Repeat three times. *** Class A: Clap rapidly in the following rhythm: 1-2-3-4, 1-2, 1-2-3-4, 1-2, 1-2, 1-2-3-4…(pause)… One big clap. *** Cookie Clap (Crummy): Everyone takes a big bowl in their arms. In bowl, dump ingredients to make cookies, such as flour, sugar, salt, chocolate chips and dill pickles (have the boys tell out the ingredients and you’ll get some odd cookies). After the ingredients are in the bowl, you take a big spoon and with stirring motion yell “Crummy, Crummy, Crummy”. *** Corny: Hold out hands as though holding a corn on the cob – eat the corn quickly and say: “Corny, Corny Corny …” Cork: Hold out one hand as though holding the neck of a bottle. Put a cork in the bottle, then hit it in with the palm of your hand. Cow: Pretend to milk cow saying: “Squirt, squirt, squirt, mooo.” Cow Yell: MOOOOO!!! MOOOOO!!! MOOOOO!!!
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Crab: Have the group stand. Have them pretend to be on a boat, by swaying back and forth, and from side to side, have them grab hold of a rope as if they are hauling in their trap, have then grab the trap box and say: “THIS IS THE BIGGEST KING CRAB I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!” *** Coyote: Have everyone stand, cup their hands around their mouth and say: “YIP, YIP, YIPEEEE!!!!” Deep Sea Diver: Pretend to put on your diving suit, adjust your helmet, pretend to close face door, and screw the locks in place. Then pretend to jump into the water by jumping one step ahead, pretend to be sinking to the ocean floor, mumbling, “BLUG, BLUG, BLUG!!!” Desert Rat: Clutch throat and say: “HOW, HOW, HOW, WATER, WATER, GLUG, GLUG, GLUG.” Wipe your mouth and say “AHHHHhhhhh, I sure feel and look better.!!!” Dip Stick: Pretend to get under the hood of your car, find the dip stick, pull it out, and say, “YOU SHURE COULD USE AN OIL CHANGE” and pretend to put it back, close the hood with a SLAM!!! Dreamer: Pretend to snore and wake up. Stretch and say: “WOW, that was a Great Dream !!!” *** Drum: On legs make a rat-a-tat sound 3 or 4 times, then hit the stomach two times and say “Boom, Boom”. Elephant: Let arm act as a trunk, wave it brokenly in front of your face. Raise your forearm up and down and say, “Peanuts, peanuts anyone?” Eskimo: “Brrrrr-rr, Brrrrr-rr”. Ferris Wheel: Move right arm in a large circle, on the upswing say: “OHHHHH!” On the downswing say: “AHHHHH!” Firecracker: Strike a match on the leg, light the firecracker, make noise like fuse “ssss”, then yell loudly “BANG!!” *** Fire Engine: Divide the group into four sections: (1) Rings the bell fast, “DING”; (2) Honks the horn, “HONK, HONK, HONK”; (3) Sounds the siren, “Rrrr, Rrrr, Rrrr”; (4) Clangs the clanger, “CLANG, CLANG, CLANG”. Have all four groups do their parts together. Fisherman: Pretend to reel out some line, let it drift, yank your pretend pole back and start to reel in the fish. Struggle with it for a short time and say: “I’VE GOT IT!!! I’VE GOT IT!!!” Flat Tire: Bend down, attach pump to tire, lift and push on pump three times, then say, “BOOM!” and jump back in surprise.
Flintstone: Shake hands over the head and say, “Yabba-dabba-doo”. (The) Fonz: Make a fist thumbs pointing up with each hand in front of you and say “Aaaaaaaayyyy”. Fruit Salad: Eat a large piece of pretend watermelon, spit out the seeds, pretend to have a piece of cantaloupe, spit out the seeds, then have a cherry, place a finger in your cheek and give one small pop as if spitting out the pit of the cherry. Ghost: Wave hands like a ghost and say: “SHOOOO, WHOO, WHOOOOOOOO!!” Variation: Wail, “BOO! BOO! BOO!” three times and then yell: “YAHHH!!” Giant Beehive: Tell the group to buzz like a bee. When your hand is raised, the volume should increase. When you lower your hand the volume should decrease. Practice at various levels. ***Golf: Shout “FORE” and pretend to hit the ball, place hand over above eyes to follow where the ball went. Variation: Add: Duck and cover your eyes saying: “OH NO! I HIT SOMEONE!!” Gondolier: Make a motion as if polling a boat, singing out: “O, SOLE MIO”. Good Turn: Stand up and turn around. Grand Howl: “HOW! HOW! HOO-O-OO-OOW!” Grand Sneeze: “A-h-h-h Chooooo!” three times, each time getting louder. *** Grand: Everyone is sitting down in their chairs. All stomp their feet three times loudly, then slap leg three times, then clap three times. Then stand up all together and shout “Ra, Ra, Ra!” Grape Juice: Everyone stomps around as if stomping grapes, then reach down with one hand dipping with a glass and drinking it, saying, “AAAAAhhhhh.” Guillotine: Pretend to wind a crank pulling the blade up, tie it off, take an imaginary axe and cut the rope. Knife your hand down like a blade, saying “Slooosh”. Then roll one hand over the other while saying, “Thud, flop, flop, flop.” Half A Hand: Hold up one hand with the palm open, with the other hand, cover the open hand so only half shows. Variation: Add a phrase such as “You are handy to have around.” Helper: Group stand and cheers, “Great job! Great JOB! GREAT JOB!” getting louder each time. Hamburger: Make a hamburger patty by clapping hands turning left
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hand on top, then left hand on the bottom. Hangman: Put your hand behind your neck like you are holding a hangman’s noose, then roll eyes and stick out your tongue. Heart And Sole: Slap heart and sole of shoe. Home Run: Simulate swinging a bat, then shade your eyes with your hands and yell “Thar she goes.” *** Hot Dog And Mustard: Get your hot dog and put it in a bun. Pick up the mustard bottle and squeeze some mustard on the hot dog, then take a big bite and say, “Yummmmmmmmmm!” Howdy: “HOOOOOW DDD DEEEE!!!” *** Howdy Pardner “HOOOOOW DDD DEEE PARRRDNER!!!!” *** Indiana Jones: Swing hand and arm back and then forward simulating the snapping of a whip. “Snakes, it would have to be snakes.” Invention: “I’ve made it, I’ve made it. I don’t know what it is, but I’ve made if.” Javelin: Hold hand as if close over a javelin, raise arm above shoulder and pretend to throw the javelin forward, wait a couple of seconds and say “Thud.” Jaws (Shark): Chomp, Chomp, Chomp. Jaws (version 2): Hold arms to cover face (hands holding elbows) yell “AAAAAAH, HELP!” Jet Clap: Swish your hand across the front of you like a jet and clap your hands twice, real fast to simulate the sonic boom. *** Jolly Green Giant: HO, HO, HO. GREEEEN GIANT Knight: Kneel and place your right hand on your left shoulder, then on your right shoulder, while saying – “I dub thee Sir Knight.” Lightening: With one hand draw a zigzag in the air in front of you saying, “ZAP, ZAP, ZAP.” *** Livewire: Grab onto a live electrical wire and shake the whole body. Lumberjack: Pretend to be chopping a tree then shout “Chop, Chop, Chop, TIMMMMMBERRRRR!” Mad Doctor: “Scalpel, sponge, sponge, sponge, oops.” Mad Scientist: Pretend to hold a test tube in one hand. Pour something into it; then something else, then shout “Boooommmm!”
Mexican Hat Dance: Put hands on feet and stamp feet while turning around in a circle. Moose: Place open hands by ears to form antlers and call “OOOOO-AAA-OOOO.” Mosquito: With hand, slap yourself on the neck, arms, legs, while saying “Oooo, Aaaah.” This can also be done by taking one finger and moving it around in the air as a mosquito flying (making a buzzing sound at the same time), letting it land on your arm, slapping at it, and then shaking off the dead mosquito. Motorcycle: Lift up the left foot and slam it down starting the engine with your hands, pretending to hold handlebars and saying “V-V-r-a-a-a-a-m-m-m-m.” Mountain Climbers: Pretend climbing on mountain. A rock slips off. Put your hand over your eyes, look down and yell “Look OUT BELOW!” Mount Saint Helen’s: Make fists out of both hands and put them together. Make the sound of steam building “ssssSSSS,” the sound builds; then when the mountain erupts yell “POP” as hands and arms extend over the head. Nail Pounding: Start the nail, drive it in, and hit the thumb yelling, “OOO-UUU-CCC-HHH!” A Nickel’s Worth: Flip your thumb as though flipping a coin, then catch it and slap it on the back of your hand. Oggy Oggy Oggy: Oggy Oggy Oggy, Oi, Oi, Oi, Oggy, Oi, Oggy, Oi, Oggy, Oggy, Oggy, Oi, Oi, Oi! Olympics: Join hands, raise them over head and shout, “Go for the Gold!” Oil Well: Yell “CRUDE, CRUDE, CRUDE.” *** Pack I: Everyone yell together, “Clap your hands,” then clap hands together two times. Then yell “Stomp your feet,” then stomp feet three times on the floor. Then say, “PACK(TROOP)____ can’t be beat.” Pack II: “Razzle, dazzle, never frazzle, not a thread but wool. Al together, all together, that’s the way we pull.” Pancake: Pretend to be holding a frying pan and a spatula in your hands. Pretend to put the spatula under the pancake and flip the pancake into the air. Look into the air as though watching the pancake flip in the air. Catch the pancake with the spatula, and flip it on your hand making a loud “Clap.”
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Paper Bag: Make motions to simulate opening a paper bag, forming neck, blowing it up and pop it saying “POP” loudly. Party: Throw hands in the air and say, “Confetti, Confetti, Confetti.” Pat on the Back: Everyone pat the back of the left shoulder with their right hand. Personal: Stomp feet three times and shout personal name. Pinata: Pretend to hit piñata, say “Swoosh” (miss), “Swoosh” (miss), “Swoosh” (hit) “HOORARY” *** Pirate: “Yo, ho, ho, and a bottle of Sprite.” Variation: “Avast Ye land lubbers! Walk that plant! Glub, Glub, Glub.” Variation 2: “Hoist the Jolly Roger! We’re off to find the treasure! Yo Ho Ho!!” Pole Vault: Stand two fingers of one hand on the other arm like legs. Have them run down the arm to the wrist and then leap into the air, as the hand comes down, CLAP! *** Popeye: First group yells, “Where’s my spinach! Where’s my spinach!” 2nd group yells “Toot, toot! You’re Popeye the sailor man! Here’s your spinach!” 1st group: “Well, blow me down, I love my spinach! Toot, toot!” Race Car: Say “Varoooom” five times starting quietly and increasing in loudness each time while shifting gears with the right hand. *** Rainstorm: To simulate rain, have everyone pat one finger of the left hand and one finger of the right hand. Gradually increase the intensity of the storm by increasing the fingers hitting together. Decrease the number of fingers as the storm passes. *** Relay: First person in row claps next person’s hand and so on down to the end of the row. Road Runner: “Beep-Beep-Zoom.” Robot: Walk stiff legged with arms in place saying in a monotone voice “DOES NOT COMPUTE, DOES NOT COMPUTE!” *** Rooster: Placing your thumbs in your armpits, wave the arms up and down while crowing. Round of Applause: While clapping hands, move them in a circle in front of you. *** Santa Claus: Reach out and hold stomach saying loudly “HO, HO, HO” three times. Variation: Add “MERRY CHRISTMAS!” Santa Claus Chimney: Pretend to be driving your sleigh, say
“Whoa!” (pulling up on reins), get out of the sleigh, pretend to climb into the chimney, begin to slide down and struggle, say: “Wheeze, grunt, rattle, clank, oh no,” move hands as if falling trying to grasp the sides of the chimney, then yell: “Craaaasssshhhh” and put your finger to your mouth and say: “Shhhhhhhhhh!” Satellite: Put your right hand over your head, making a circular motion with the right hand, opening and closing the right fist, while saying: “Gleep, Gleep, Gleep.” Variation: Begin with a countdown from 120, at zero, yell: “BLASTOFF!” stretch arm over head saying “Gleep, Gleep, Gleep” and turn around three times. Saw: Pretend to get a piece of lumber, measure it, pretend to draw a line, place pencil behind the ear, pick up your pretend saw and begin to saw holding your lumber with one hand and sawing with the other, while making your best sawing impression. *** Seal of Approval: Put your thumbs in your armpits, then move arms up and down like a seal moving it’s flippers and say: “Arf, Arf, Arf” several times. Variation: Pretend you are balancing a ball on the end of your nose. Siesta: Remain seated and pull an imaginary sombrero over face while snoring loudly. Silent: Raise both fists to level with hand and shout without any sound while shaking both fists. Or else have everyone stand in unison and open their mouths and scream without making any sound. *** Six Shooter: Point finger in the air and say “BANG” six times, then blow smoke from the end of the gun. Sky Rocket: Make a motion of striking a match on your pants, lean over to light your rocket. Make a “SH, SH, SH” sound, point from the floor to the sky as if you were following it in flight with your finger. Clap hands and say “BOOM”, spread arms wide and say “AH___AH___AH.” Stamp of Approval: Pound the palm of your left hand rapidly with your right fist. For another version, throw a handkerchief or cap in the air, have the youth stamp their feet until the cap hits the floor. Steamboat: Use both hands to make large rotary motion as if they were paddle wheels. At the same time say, “Chug-achug-chug.” Then reach up with the right hand and pull down saying “Toot, Toot.” *** Superscout: “Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. It’s Superscout!” Swimmer’s Belly: Put both hands out in front of you and slap your hands together once. Look both ways and say “Where’s the water, where’s the water.”
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Swine: “Suueeee, Pig! Pig! Pig!” Sword: Pretend to have a sword in your hand. Swing it across the body three times saying: “Swish, Swish, Swish.” *** Three Strikes: Turn head to the side sharply while saying “Strike!” Do these three times and end with, “You’re out!” Tiger: Shout “Grrrreat!” Thrust fist upward Tony Tiger style. Tightrope Walker: Have your arms out as if balancing on a tightrope. Lean to one side and say “Aaaiiiii” as you simulate falling. *** Tortilla: Slap both hands together, alternating one hand and the other from top to bottom. On every fourth clap, shout “OLE!” Toucan: Hold hands in front of mouth, simulating a bird opening its beak, several times while saying “TOUCAN, TOUCAN, TOUCAN! A CUB CAN TOO!!!” *** Train: Divide audience into groups to make different train sounds, getting faster and faster until a bell rings. Trumpet: “da-da-da-da-dada-da-da-CHARGE!” *** Turkey: Say “Gobble, gobble, gobble” then rubs stomach saying “Yum, yum.” Two-Handed Saw: Everyone pairs off into two’s. Each pair sticks their hands out with their thumbs up. Alternately grab each other’s thumbs until all four hands are each holding a thumb. Move arms and hands back and forth as if sawing. Viking: “Attack! Attack! Attack! Retreat! Retreat! Retreat! Retreat!” Watermelon: Hold a piece of watermelon in both hands, make the motions of taking several bites, turn head ad spit out the seeds. Weightlifter: Attempt to lift barbell and say “AAAaagh!” as you get the weight up above the head, and then drop it to the floor saying, “THUD!” Witch: Say in witchy voice: “Heee, Heee, Heee.” Wolf: “Wolf, wolf, wolf,” then give wolf howl. Yodelers: Cup hands around mouth saying “Yodel, ley, lee, who.”
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SCOUT CAMP GRACES
1. Alphabet Grace
A-‐B-‐C-‐D-‐E-‐F-‐G Thank you, God, for feeding me. Drink and bread and meat I see, Thank you, God, for feeding me. With the land and grass and tree, Thank you, God, for feeding me.
2. Johnny Appleseed
Oh the Lord is good to me, and so I thank the Lord, For giving me the things I need, The sun and the rain and the apple seed, The Lord is good to me. For every seed I sow, an apple tree will grow, And there will be apples there Enough for the whole wide world to share, The Lord is good to me Johnny Appleseed Amen.
3. Superman
Thank you Lord, for giving us food Thank you Lord, for giving us food For the food we eat, for the friends we meet, Thank you Lord for giving us food.
4. Flintstones
God is Great and God is Good and so we thank Him for our food. God is Great and God is Good and so we thank Him for our food. Amen, ah-‐ah-‐ah-‐ah-‐ah-‐amen. Amen, ah-‐ah-‐ah-‐ah-‐ah-‐amen. God is Great and God is Good and so we thank Him for our -‐ We thank Him for our -‐ We thank Him for our food!
5. Addams Family
We thank you Lord for giving, The food we need for living Because we really need it, and we like it too!
6. Edelweiss
Thank you Lord, on this day For our many good blessings. Thank you Lord, on this day For our many close friendships. Glory to God, may you hear our prayers, Guide us on forever, Thank you Lord, on this day For our blessings and friendships.
7. Zipadee do da
Zipadee do da, Zipadee ay, I am grateful for God's blessings today. I've plenty to eat, to drink and to share, I sit at God's table with friends everywhere.
8. We Will Rock You
Heavenly Father, Lord and King, You provide us with everything. We've got Food on our plate, Tastin' great. Thanks for the food we already ate. Singing thank you, Father, thank you! Thank you, Father, thank you!
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SCOUT TABLE GAMES
1. Telephone Game
Caller: Hey “Mark – name of person” Receiver: I think I hear my name Caller: Hey Mark Receiver: I think I hear it again ALL: You’re wanted on the telephone Receiver: If it’s not “Wendy – name of person”, I’m not home Repeat by calling next person
2. Duck Game
Inspiration for a question game required an increasing number of people. You are asked the opening question and answer with the set response. At the end, turn to someone else (anyone from a complete stranger to someone's who's standing there waiting to join) and ask the opening question. Results in a long chain of people passing responses or question from the original person to the most recent participant. Caller: Hey (name of person) wanna buy a duck? Receiver: A what? Caller: A duck! Receiver: Does it quack? Caller: Of course it quacks. It’s a duck! Receiver: Just a second. Hey (name of next person) wanna buy a duck? Repeat the game as a chain so that each person asking a question goes all the way back to the person who initiated the game.
3. Show us how to get down!
Caller: Hey (name of person), show us how to get down! Receiver: No way! ALL: Show us how to get down! Receiver: okay
I stomp my feet, I move it to the beat, I turn around, and I shake it to the ground (with actions) Receiver: Hey (name of next person), show us how to get down! Repeat by moving around the room. Person who gets down gets to pick the next person.
4. Table Game
One table starts by banging fists on table, calling “We are table #1, #1, #1, we are table #1, where is number 2?” First table to respond becomes table 2 and asks for table 3 and so on.
5. Llama Mama
Llama Mama is a common American circle game sort of like "Want to Buy a Duck" but more complex. It's commonly played within middle schoolers. Person 1: What's your mama? P2: I've got a llama mama. P3: You're mama's a mama? P4: No, a llama! P1: I want a llama! P2: No! You can't have my mama, with all that drama!
6. Strong & Able
When a person sees another person with their elbows on the table they callout: [name] [name] strong and able this is not a horses stable take your elbows off the table At which they have to run around the dining room (1 lap) punishment.
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SCOUT VESPERS
1. Chil the Kite
Now Chil the Kite Brings home the night That Mang the Bat sets free. The herds are shut In byre and hut For loose till dawn are we. This is the hour Of pride and power Of talon and tusk and claw. Oh! Hear the call! Good Hunting all That keep the Jungle Law. 2. Family Cub Vesper (tune: O Christmas Tree) Quietly we join as one, Thanking God for family fun. May we now go on our way, Thankful for another day. May we always love and share, Live in peace beyond compare. As a family may we find, Friendships true with all mankind. -Nashua Valley/Pioneer Valley Pow Wow 1996 3. Cub Scout Prayer (I) (tune: O Tannenbaum) Lord, in this evening hour I pray, For strength to do my best each day. Draw near to me that I may see, The kind of Cub that I should be. In serving other, let me see, That I am only serving Thee. Bless me, Oh Lord, in Thy great love, That I may be a better Cub. 4. Do Your Best (DYB) Tune: Row, Row, Row Your Boat) Do, do, do your best Do it every day!
Surely, surely, surely, surely That's the Cubbing way. 5. Cub Scout Vesper Song (Tune: O Christmas Tree): Softly falls the light of day, as our campfire fades away, Silently each Beaver asks, have I done my daily tasks? Did I give the world my care, remembering to smile and share? Beavers turn to God in prayer, knowing He will always care. Softly falls the light of day, as our campfire fades away, Silently each Cub shall ask, have I done my daily tasks? Have I kept my Cub laws too, taught to me by Old Baloo? Have I tried to do my best? God grant me a quiet rest. Softly falls the light of day, as our campfire fades away, Silently each Scout shall ask, have I done my daily tasks? Have I kept my honour bright? Can I guiltless sleep tonight? Have I done and have I dared, everything to be prepared? Softly falls the light of day, as our campfire fades away, Silently each Venturer asks, have I done my daily tasks? Have I kept my challenge true? Side by side, we’ll see it through, Have I turned to God today? Let Him help show us the way. Softly falls the light of day, as our campfire fades away, Silently each Rover asks, have I done my daily tasks? Have I served my fellow man, guided by our Founder’s hand? Rovers try to do their best; God will help them with the rest. Softly falls the light of day, as our campfire fades away, Silently each Leader asks, have I done my daily tasks? Have I given my very best, to the youth about to rest? Leaders keep the Scouting Spirit, with help of the Holy Spirit.
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6. Cub Flashlight (Tune: By the Light of the Slivery Moon) By the light Of my Cub Scout flashlight Wish I could see What it was that just bit my knee Batteries Keep a'shinin' for me The chance is slim The chance is slight I can last through the night With my Cub Scout flashlight 7. Cub Scout Prayer (II) Thank you for a night of good hunting that lends us down trails both familiar and new. Watch over us as we make our way through life’s jungle. Help us to keep the Wolf Cub Law and Do Our Best in the week ahead.
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ANNOUNCEMENTS
1. Announcement Song (I) Announcements, announcements, announcements. A horrible way to die, a horrible way to die, A horrible way to start the day, A horrible way to die. Announcements, announcements, announcements. What a terrible way to die, What a terrible way to die, What a terrible death, to be talked to death. What a terrible way to die. Announcements, announcements, announcements. Row Row Row your Boat Gently down the stream throw the announcements overboard and listen to them scream Announcements, announcements, announcements Row, row, row your boat Gently down the stream. Ha Ha! Fooled you, I'm a submarine. Announcements, announcements, announcements When you're up, you're up And when you're down, you're down. And when you're only halfway up You're also halfway down. Announcements, announcements, announcements Mary had a little lamb The doctor was surprised. Old McDonald had a farm He couldn't believe his eyes. Announcements, announcements, announcements ( A slow tempo verse) I was a farmer, I had some cows. I had some chickens, and great big sows. The sows said "Oink, oink". The chicks went "Cluck cluck". But the cows said "Run fast! Here comes the bull!"
Announcements, announcements, announcements We've got a silly cheer, that you've just got to hear! It makes no sense we're sure you know, The announcements have to GO! Announcements, announcements, announcements 2. Announcement Song (II) (to the tune of Frere' Jauque) Words of wisdom, words of wisdom, We don't need, we don't need, Stupid words of wisdom, stupid words of wisdom, Dumb, dumb, dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb. Announcements, announcements, announcements. 3. Announcement Song (III) (to the tune of London Bridge) Make the announcements short and sweet, Short and sweet, Short and sweet. Make the announcements short and sweet, They're so BORING! 4. Announcement Song (IV) The man stood up to talk. He talked real long and hard. He talked so long that I wrote this song, On the lid of a can of lard! Now lard is used to cook, And words they make a book. But if this guy keeps talking up a storm, We'll be awake no more!