2018WinnersLevel1:I'mimportantLevel2:I'mmoreimportantLevel3:I'mtheonlyonethatmatters-Rebecca,TokomairiroHighSchool,Milton“Iwanttoteachatahighschooloneday,”saysnohighschoolstudentever.-Sam,GreenBayHighSchool,GreenBay,Auckland“Let'smakethisyear'sworkbookhavelimitedroomforanswers.”-workbookdesigners-Liam,CashmereHighSchool,Somerfield,ChristchurchTakingNCEAexamsinCatholicschooliseasybecauseJesusistheanswer.-Riley,SacredHeartGirls’College,HamiltonEast,HamiltonYoucanleadaNCEAstudenttoanexam,butyoucan'tmakethemattemptit-ancientNZproverb-Cian,HamiltonBoys’HighSchool,HamiltonEast,HamiltonAlwaysbringanNCEAstudentEasteregghunting.Afteryearsofsearchingforthewilltolive,they'reexperts.-Cian,HamiltonBoys’HighSchool,HamiltonEast,HamiltonNowthatwe'reapproachingtheholidays,it'sfinallytimetotakeabreakfromallthatstudyingyouhaven'tstartedyet.-Emma&Jade,OnslowCollege,Johnsonville,WellingtonRosesarered,Violetsareblue,IfyoufailedNCEA,Ididtoo-Connor,GisborneBoys'HighSchool,GisborneThebestwaytopassNCEAistopassaway.-Ashley,WaiukuCollege,WaiukuShoutouttoalltheparentswhomadetheirkidsdosomuchhouseworktheseholidaysthatgoingbacktoschoolfeelsliketheholiday.-Sarah,TeAhooTeKuraPounamu,TheCorrespondenceSchool,Thorndon,Wellington

Aren’tthereenoughproblemsintheworldwithoutNCEAprovidingmoreforustotryandanswer?-Molly,TokomairiroHighSchool,MiltonLunch,chapter1:verse30:“Atimetoeatisatimetofranticallystudybeforethatinternalyoushould’vestudiedforthenightbefore.”-Nathan,GreenBayHighSchool,GreenBay,AucklandOrganicchemistry?ToohardDifferentiation?You'rejokingBadTeacher?WhyamIevenatschoolLearnCoach?SavinggraceHotel?Trivago-Finlay,GlendowieCollege,Glendowie,AucklandOhno!IfthegovernmentscrapNCEAlevelone,howwilltheyear11slearnabsolutelynothing?-Merciana,StDominic’sCatholicCollege,Henderson,AucklandGodofnationsatThyfeet,Ijustdon'twantnotachieved,Hearourvoices,weentreat,Ireallyneedthesecredits.-NCEAstudentanthem-Aylish,SacredHeartGirls’College,HamiltonEast,HamiltonLikeamitochondria,DavidSeymouristhepowerhouseofDancingwiththeStars.-Emma&Jade,OnslowCollege,Johnsonville,WellingtonNCEA2002Youcan'tbringphonesintoexamsNCEA2018Youcan'tbringwatchesintoexamsNCEA2034Youcan'tbringstationeryintoexams-Nirhjah,ColumbaCollege,Roslyn,DunedinBallseasoniseveryNCEAstudent'smostengagingmathproblemoftheyear:howmanybathroomtripsbeforeIgetcaughtwiththisflask?-Cian,HamiltonBoys'HighSchool,HamiltonEast,HamiltonTheonlydifferencebetweenJacindabeingpregnantandyourfavouriteteacheristhatJacinda'sbadsubstituteisn’tunderpaid.-Libby,JamesHargestCollege,Hargest,Invercargill

NCEAPhotographyiseasy.JustgetyourexammarkertofollowyouonInstagramandfollowthembackforanexcellence.-Aylish,SacredHeartGirls'College,HamiltonEast,Hamilton"Puresadness"has11lettersinit.SodoesNCEAAAAAAAA.Coincidence?-Fran,WhangareiGirls'HighSchool,Regent,WhangareiWewouldmakeajokeaboutNCEALevel2Latin,butnobodytakesNCEALevel2Latin.-Sophie,Queen'sHighSchool,StClair,DunedinForbiddenClassroomItems:-yourbestfriendwithintalkingdistance-bendyrulers,primedandreadyforslapping-ideasthatconflictwithwhatyourteacherthinks-televisionsmadeafter1980-matchsticksintheSacredHeartGirlsCollegeHamiltonscienceblock-Sophie,Queen’sHighSchool,StClair,Dunedin-Aria,MarlboroughGirls’College,Springlands,Blenheim-Angela,VillaMariaCollege,UpperRiccarton,Christchurch-Deanna,GlendowieCollege,Glendowie,Auckland-Jazmine,SacredHeartGirls’College,HamiltonEast,HamiltonGettingscholarshipinLevel2istheepitomeofbigexcellenceenergy.-Jazmine,SacredHeartGirls’College,HamiltonEast,HamiltonAnartisticexpressionofNCEA...----Kaylen,StMary'sDiocesanSchool,Stratford,TaranakiThedifferencebetweenAustralia'sATARandNewZealand'sNCEAis7PrimeMinistersin9years.-Rebecca,TokomairiroHighSchool,Milton"Itakemorethanoneportfoliosubject,becauseIliketheideaofartworkIspentallyearonbeinggradedinlessthan5minutes."-noone-Chloe,Queen’sHighSchool,StClair,DunedinNZQAwantstoknowiflearningtowritedecentexampapersisevergoingtohelpthemintherealworld.-Emma&Jade,OnslowCollege,Johnsonville,Wellington

Knockknock.Who'sthere?Unfamiliartext.Unfamiliartextwho?Unfamiliartextwhoeveryouwantmetobe,whensupportedbyevidence.-Sarah,TeAhooTeKuraPounamu,TheCorrespondenceSchool,Thorndon,WellingtonThedifferencebetweenNCEAandabusticketisthatthebusticketmightgetyousomewhere.-Bridget,RangiRuruGirls'School,Merivale,ChristchurchStuckonanevolutionquestioninabiologyexam?Justaskthesupervisorswhatitwaslikewhenlifefirstappeared.-Sarah,TeAhooTeKuraPounamu,TheCorrespondenceSchool,Thorndon,WellingtonIfyouhaven’tstartedyet,don’tworry-it’stoolate.-Nirhjah,ColumbaCollege,Roslyn,DunedinNCEA:NotConsistentlyExcellingAcademically-Blake,WhangaparaoaCollege,Whangaparaoa,AucklandForHalloween,NZQAiscomingdressedasaProfileofExpectedPerformancegraph.-Nirhjah,ColumbaCollege,Roslyn,DunedinWhenschoolisoveryouwon’tmissaskingpeoplewhattheyhavenextperiod,becauseyoudon’tcare.-Holly,SacredHeartGirls'College,HamiltonEast,HamiltonGuyFawkeswould'vegotafirm"notachieved"foroverthrowingtheUKgovernment.-Bridget,RangiRuruGirls'School,Merivale,ChristchurchOpeningyourexamislikeopeningaChristmasgifttofindit'saLynxgiftpack.-Chloe,Queen’sHighSchool,StClair,DunedinNCEAislikeShortlandStreet,itnevergetsbetter.-Bronte&Isaac,DarfieldHighSchool,Darfield,Canterbury

It’sthattimeoftheyearagainwhenyou’remoredisappointedaboutthecomedycompetitionbeingoverthanyourparentsareinyou.-Bridget,RangiRuruGirls'School,Merivale,Christchurch