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  • TREATING TRAUMA FROM SEXUAL BETRAYAL

    WEEK 1: GROUP WELCOME AND INTRODUCTION

    OBJECTIVE

    The objectives of this week’s group are to get to know the others in your group, help you

    understand yourself and what your trauma looks like, and review the treatment model for

    addressing trauma from sexual betrayal.

    COMPLETE:

    ‣ Welcome to Group ‣ Review a Model to Address Sexual Betrayal: The Essential Tools for Healing

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 1 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

    Betrayal trauma is a condition that literally parallels PTSD (post-

    traumatic stress disorder). PTSD can occur anytime the mind

    attempts to process a traumatic event that surpasses the customary

    or natural human experience. When trust and safety are broken, the

    betrayed spouse naturally calls into question the bond they have

    with their partner, and the reaction is manifested in characteristics

    aligned with PTSD; namely depression, anxiety, flashbacks, recurrent

    nightmares, and avoidance of reminders of the event.

  • WELCOME TO GROUP

    Where are you from?

    What is something a lot of people don’t know about you?

    What is the most fun thing you’ve ever done?

    If you had an hour to yourself, what would you do?

    What do you hope to accomplish in this group?

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 2 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • A MODEL TO ADDRESS SEXUAL BETRAYAL: THE ESSENTIAL TOOLS FOR

    HEALING

    CORE SOLUTION #1: SEEK GENUINE UNDERSTANDING AND CREATE A SAFE AND TRUSTING ENVIRONMENT

    CORE SOLUTION #2: INTERNAL EXPLORATION: RESOLVE DIFFICULT EMOTIONS AND HURTFUL BELIEFS

    CORE SOLUTION #3: CREATING A POSITIVE SUPPORT NETWORK WHILE REDUCING NEGATIVE INTERACTIONS

    CORE SOLUTION #4: STRENGTHENING YOUR INNER SELF

    COMPONENT #1

    Model Compassion

    Explore new and old wounds (Key Life Events Inventory)

    Boundaries Self-trust

    COMPONENT #2

    Understand client/ help them feel felt

    Identify triggers Establish close connections

    Self-care

    COMPONENT #3

    Provide education and clear guidance

    Find core beliefs about self and others

    Build a support team

    Mindfulness/Yoga

    COMPONENT #4

    Help client listen to their inner voice

    Process painful memories and difficult emotions

    Inner circle (identify who’s where)

    Resiliency

    COMPONENT #5

    Establish working goals to help client feel hope

    Treat PTSD symptoms

    Understand spiritual connections

    Create genuine happiness

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 3 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • TREATING TRAUMA FROM SEXUAL BETRAYAL

    WEEK 2: EXPLORING NEW AND OLD WOUNDS

    OBJECTIVE

    The objective this week is to learn more of your story and background. Through a deep

    understanding of early life traumas, you will learn how your current relationship triggers

    add to your trauma.

    Our goal this week is that you leave with a deeper understanding about self, see the link

    between past and present, and gain a deeper appreciation for the feelings you are having.

    OOCW

    READ:

    ‣ Chapter One: The Creation of Post Traumatic Stress

    ‣ Chapter Two: Assessing Trauma from Sexual Betrayal

    ‣ Chapter Three: Adding Trauma to Trauma

    ‣ Chapter Four: Stuck in Fight, Flight or Freeze

    WATCH (LINK IS CASE SENSITIVE):

    ‣ Why Do I Feel like I’m Going Crazy? bit.ly/ADDOBT

    ‣ What, This is Normal? bit.ly/ADDOBT

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 4 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

    Memories are the key not to the past, but

    to the future.

    CORRIE TEN BOOM

  • COMPLETE:

    ‣ Key Life Events Timeline

    KEY LIFE EVENTS TIMELINE

    All of us have key life events that alter our lives for good or bad. In this assignment, your

    task is to identify the significant events that have changed your life. Take into account big

    events such as the death of a loved one, moving, your first sexual experiences, etc. Other

    things you might include: parents fighting or divorcing, a parent with mental health

    challenges or substance abuse problems, being bullied on a playground, difficult school or

    team experiences. Some of these events may have also happened in your adult years (e.g.

    Health problems, job loss, etc.). Don’t think too much about it, just write down as many

    experiences as you can think of for the next few minutes. Once you are done, place your

    experience on the timeline.

    Once you are done, place your experiences on the timeline.

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 5 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • EVENT AGE

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 6 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • Now, place each of the events above on the timeline below:

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 7 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • To finish, respond to the following prompt here or in your journal:

    Now that you have identified key life events from the past, what sticks out to you

    the most? Identify any common themes throughout the timeline as well as the

    events that had the biggest impact on your life.

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 8 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • TREATING TRAUMA FROM SEXUAL BETRAYAL

    WEEK 3: DISCOVERY, THE PAINFUL BEGINNING

    OBJECTIVE

    The objective of this week is to understand how discovery influenced you and how your

    initial response may be part of unlocking your trauma. We will help you recognize the

    physical manifestations of your trauma in order to begin working on overcoming the

    symptoms.

    Our goal is that you leave with an understanding of the importance of how Discovery Day

    (D-Day) has influenced you. In addition, we want you to understand what healthy

    disclosures and unhealthy disclosures can do for your relationship.

    OOCW

    READ:

    ‣ Chapter Five: Discovery, the Painful Beginning

    WATCH (LINK IS CASE SENSITIVE):

    ‣ How to Make Sense of Your Trauma bit.ly/ADDOBT

    COMPLETE:

    ‣ Appendix B: Sharing Your Story

    ‣ Appendix C: Support Resources for Couples Disclosures 


    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 9 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

    When we share our stories, what it does is it opens up our hearts for other people to

    share their stories. And it gives us the sense that we are not alone on this journey.

    JANINE SHEPHERD

  • TREATING TRAUMA FROM SEXUAL BETRAYAL

    WEEK 4: THE SECRET TO HEALING — IT STARTS WITH SAFETY

    OBJECTIVE

    If you don’t feel safe, overcoming trauma will be difficult. In this week’s group we will guide

    you in learning about the safety of your current environment.

    We hope that you leave this group with an increased understanding of the importance of

    safety in your healing. We also want you to begin establishing a plan so that you can

    create more safety in your life.

    OOCW

    READ:

    ‣ Chapter Six: The Secret to Healing — It Starts with Safety

    WATCH:

    ‣ No video this week!

    COMPLETE:

    ‣ Page 84: List of Support Checklist ‣ Your Relationship with Others ‣ Finding a Safe, Calm Space

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 10 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

    When we share our stories, what it does is it opens up

    our hearts for other people to share their stories. And it

    gives us the sense that we are not alone on this journey.

    JANINE SHEPHERD

  • YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH OTHERS

    OVERVIEW

    In this lesson we will help you identify how open you are with others and help you create

    more meaningful relationships.

    INSTRUCTIONS

    On a scale from 1 to 10, with 10 being “I already do this” and 1 being “I don’t do this at all,”

    how would you score yourself in these five areas? 1. Openness, 2. Honesty, 3. Integrity, 4.

    Faith & Hope, 5. Understanding of Love.

    Once you have the score written, create a game plan to improve each area.

    STEP #1

    On a scale of 1 - 10, rate the following:

    STEP #2

    How am I going to improve in the areas that need improvement?

    EVENT RATE FROM 1-10 (10 = ALREADY DO IT)

    OPENNESS

    HONESTY

    INTEGRITY

    FAITH & HOPE

    UNDERSTANDING OF LOVE

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 11 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • STEP #3

    What did you learn?

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 12 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

  • FINDING A SAFE, CALM PLACE

    INSTRUCTIONS

    Answer the following questions:

    Am I safe?

    © 2017, Addo Recovery, LLC of 13 33 FEEL CONNECTED AGAIN

    Only in a safe environment is it adaptive and appropriate

    to simultaneously inhibit defense systems and exhibit

    positive social engagement behavior.

    DR. STEPHEN PORGES

  • Where am I safe?

    If I have a safe place, can I inhibit my defense systems and exhibit positive social

    engagement be