Fall 2011

2 – About The Batter’s Box

3 – Announcements

4 – Schedule & Standings

5-8 – Sandlot Recaps

9-11 – Blue Diamond Recaps

12 - Diamonds in the Rough

13 – “The Dirt”

14 – Social Calendar

15- Charities & Sponsor Bar

16-18 – Wiffle Ball for Dummies

19 – DOs & DONTs

20 - Pictures

James Salgado & Charm Reyes

Teach me how to Dougie!

Fall 2011 – Issue 6

We can pass for siblings!!!

Winter Registration Open Start date: January 20th Where: Chilled Ponds 1416 Stephanie Way, Chesapeake, VA Times: 7:30 – 9:30

www.backyardsportsclub.com

Captains Registration is waived! $150 bar tab for winning tournament team!

6 person minimum per team – 3 guys and 3 girls

$55.00 Registration fee

Go to www.backyardsportsclub.com to register a team TODAY!

Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive! and don't forget to catch!

Coming Soon To a “Batter’s Box” Near You

Then email them to me at backyardsportsclub@gmail.com

backyardsportsclub@gmail.com

Double Pitcher

Contests

Every team will be offered a space every edition of the Newsletter to submit something funny... write about their game... whatever...and since we’re doing a newsletter every Tuesday of every week, you have plenty of time to come up with something! If your team doesn’t submit anything, and isn’t in the newsletter, talk to your captain!

Ideas for Team Submissions When I say, submit something for your team, here are some ideas: • Play by plays of the game • Document the debauchery at the bar - i.e. describing someone’s amazing acting skills hobbling across the bar with a “sprained ankle” just to Ice a teammate. ] • Draw pictures!!!!! • Favorite quotes, poems, song lyrics, movie scripts, YouTube video, or motivational speeches! • Email chains from the morning after . • Funny pictures of you, your team, or something random on the internet • Give your team member awards - drunkest, loudest, person with the least shame, best off the face catch, etc.! • Anything. Really. Someone on your team is creative.

Submissions are due EVERY Monday by 7 p.m.

Backyard Sports Club’s email is

backyardsportsclub@gmail.com. I look forward to working with all of you!

** If you need extra time, email me and just let me know.

DISCLAIMER: if you have problems with keeping your language in check, not bashing refs, being overly nasty to other teams, and other no-no’s, the Editor does have the right to not include your write up in the newsletter if the content is deemed inappropriate or out of line. We will try to screen write ups as they are received, will try to let teams know so that they have time to resubmit, but there is no guarantee. The easiest thing to do is to keep it clean, be nice, and remember this is all in good fun.

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Announcements

Please send any requests for “Announcements” to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com 3

REMINDER: There is NO smoking at the fields! And please be

discreet if you are drinking alcoholic beverages. Coolers and Solo cups are your friends!!! We do not want to lose these fields, so PLEASE respect the rules! Thanks

End of Season Tournament Games will start at 10 am. There will be a luau during the tournament. Food will be

provided. Feel free to bring beverages of your choice, but remember no bottles! There will be a Homerun Derby after the tournament. $5 buy in and it ALL goes to charity.

Polar Plunge – Anything Red

WHERE: Virginia Beach Ocean Front WHEN: February 3rd – February 4th

TIME: Early to Late Jon Reyes is looking for members of Backyard Sports Club who

want to join him in doing a selfless act of jumping in the freezing cold water for the Special Olympics. The theme of his team,

Anything Red, is just as it sounds…wear anything red. His usual plan is to get a hotel at the beach Friday night, party, wake up bright and early in the morning, drink, drink some more, and

when you finally get enough liquid courage in you…jump in the Atlantic Ocean! If you want to join his team or if you would just like to donate, you can talk to him, or search “Polar Plunge Me

Please!” on Facebook to find more information.

Hair Graphics Owner and Master Stylist, Joy Gillenwater from I’d Hit That has been creating avant-garde looks for over 10 years. Educated by some of the leading companies in the salon industry; Vidall Sasson, Bumble & Bumble, Wella and Paul Mitchel, to name a few. She has a acquired a multitude of skills to give clients the exact look they want. Her work is inspired by the love of art and design specializing in texture cuts and creative color techniques. Joy believes that your hair is a very important part of your life, as well as your self-image and personality and looks forward to working with you.

Pembroke Chiropractic

Holly Hickson and Marcie Masterman from Holey Balls in Your Mouth work at Pembroke Chiropractic for Dr. Mark Soccio. Allow your body to “Fall Into Good Health” this season without the use of harmful drugs or surgery. Our holistic approach goes beyond the medical approach. Our first goal is to help you get out of pain as quickly as possible by assisting your body’s inborn ability to heal. Discover Chiropractic!

Don’t forget to like us on Facebook!

Happy Healing!

757-490-5828

Please submit all scores and write ups about your teams to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com 4

Blue Diamond November 3rd Schedule

6:30 Games • Wiffle Crush vs. Sons of Pitches – Field 1 • Wiffskey Militia vs. Take a Wiff of This – Field 2 7:30 Games • Wiffle Crush vs. Holey Balls – Field 1 • Wiffskey Militia vs I’d Hit That – Field 2

8:30 Games • Wiffle Crush vs. Holey Balls – Field 1

• Wiffskey Militia vs. I’d Hit That– Field 2

Take a Wiff of This 8 6 1 1 Sons of Pitches 9 6 3 0 Wiffskey Militia 7 5 1 1 I’d Hit That 7 2 5 0 Holey Balls in Your Mouth 8 2 6 0 Wiffle Crush 7 1 6 0

Blue Diamond Standings Team Name GP W L T

Flying Wiffles 8 5 3 0 Wiffle Dat Azz 8 5 3 0 Wiffler’s Mom 8 5 3 0 Chicken N Wiffles 8 4 4 0 Da Bombers 8 1 7 0

Sandlot Standings Team Name GP W L T

Da bombers vs flying wiffles

“Well, we weren’t sure how many people we were going to have because a lot of people were out, but we ended up having enough people- even though someone came in their work clothes and played! We gave it a tough fight and had a few errors here and there, but everyone hit well and we played hard, but we couldn’t come to beat Jon’s team- they have good hitters on their team. They were still fun to play, even though they beat us! As always, I’m very proud of the team!”

- Ashley Burres

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No Write-Up Was Submitted on behalf of

Flying Wiffles

Wiffler’s mom vs chicken n wiffles

For the last week regular season games, Wifflers Mom decided to have a mutiny against the captain and his pitching. I will say it wasn't that bad, but who am I to say. They were going to give me one more shot in the first game, which They ended up taking me off the mound half way through. I can blame our loss to Chicken N Wiffles on my team’s rebellion against me. Great job guys!

- Jeff Bouley

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No Write-Up Was Submitted on behalf of

Chicken N Wiffles

Wiffler’s mom vs da bombers

“We always have a great time playing Charm’s team- they’re so fun! This game seemed like a long shot because we were getting beat pretty bad early on, but we stuck with it and put up a good fight- we ended up rallying in the last inning and almost came back, but came up short! They won, but we were hitting great and made some great defensive plays. Everyone did great and I’m definitely proud of the team! Watch out for the tournament- we’re playing to win!!! J”

- Ashley Burress

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Wifflers Mom was on the rebound but it was a little too late. For the second game with a new pitcher and a new batting order we rallied in the first to get to a good size lead which we held till the end. Way to end on a good note team and finish with a winning record!

- Jeff Bouley

Wiffle dat azz vs flying wiffles

What a game, what a game! Wasn’t sure how this night was going to go, especially for me (I was a little drunkey coming to the game since my work had just hosted a Yappy Hour). Reyes and company scored nine runs in the first two innings so it wasn’t looking good for us. Finally at the bottom of the 5th inning, Christie yells out in her cute little Southern accent that we all love “Come on ya’ll, we only need 8 runs.” I don’t know if she was being sarcastic or serious, but whatever, it worked! Wiffle Dat Azz came back and scored nine runs. What a great inning…I even got to play a lil game of Twister with Jessica! All I can say is it felt GREAT to give Jon an L for the evening ;)

- Stella Solorzano

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No Write-Up Was Submitted on behalf of

Flying Wiffles

Take a Wiff of This

Holey Balls in Your Mouth

Take a Wiff vs. I’d Hit That This game started out really slow, and I’d Hit That took the lead pretty early on. Take a Wiff just couldn’t find our bats this game. The wind was blowing in, and stopping all of our balls in their tracks. It seemed like the only 2 playing D on their team were Daniel Reyes and “Angry” Ronnie! We just couldn’t get our balls past those two. It was a low scoring game, but we managed to pull out a W in the end. Good game to both teams!

Take a Wiff vs. Wiffskey Militia A well played game by both teams. Take a Wiff had a few minor mishaps in the field, and we couldn’t find our bats this game. Ryan Roebuck played excellent defense along with the rest of the Militia. This was a very close game, and it ended up being a tie in the end. Wish we could face these guys again this season, but due to the majority of our team being in Florida for a baseball tournament, we’ll have to wait till next season.

- Charm Reyes

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Holey Balls vs. Wiffskey Militia My team goal has always been not to lose by double digits. Going by history against Wiffskey Militia, the team goal would be modified to keep the game from being called off due to the slaughter rule. We lost by 12 but at least we put 4 points againist them. We were not able to stop the ground balls but the game was a good warm up to our 7:30 game against Sons of Pitches. Great game by all.

Holey Balls vs. Sons of Pitches We heard a lot about the Sons of Pitches. They were coming off a 5-game winning streak and they beat the Top 2 teams last week. They even sat behind us in the dugout to intimidate us. Just playin on the last part :P But that didn't scare my team. I missed the 1st game against them and I heard it was very close. Holey Balls was motivated to win. Holey Balls had solid base hits throughout the game and aggressive base running. Great game by all.

- James Salgado

I’d Hit That

Sons of Pitches Sons of Pitches vs. I’d Hit That

Our game against I'd Hit That was a lot of fun not because we won but because we got to play them when they were in a good mood and not having to worry about their wayward drunken teammates. Rebecka kicked them off the team and their team spirit and play on the field has greatly improved. Ronnie played great on defense. We hit a few home runs (of course Caroline again) and played good enough defense to win. The real story was Cory releasing the bat after the swing. Not once, but TWICE, did he let go of the bat on the follow through and it whipped around and hit Nadia! we'll do a better job of controlling the monster next week. Sorry Nadia!

Sons of Pitches vs. Holey Balls in Your Mouth We were excited to play Holey Balls in Your Mouth when they were at full strength. Adding Salgado makes a big difference. You may call it slap hitting, we call it BUNTING!!!!!! Other than James' cheating and hurtful ways, we had a good time. The pitches never got the bats going and made silly mental mistakes on defense that cost us extra runs. Not once, but TWICE, was I caught off the bag and tagged out. My bad, Pitches. Caroline and Brian knocked a couple out but that was about all our offense could muster. Game ended when one of our players slid back into first base after rounding the base. that was the third out of the game. AWFUL way to lose a game but rules are rules.

- Will Buker 10

I’d Hit That vs. Sons of Pitches We got our asses beat... literally. Ruthless! But it's good to know that chivalry isn't dead: After hitting Nadia with the bat (not once, but twice), in true woman-beating fashion, Corey was kind enough to buy her a make-up pitcher of beer at UNO's (the man's got class, ladies!). Even with Daniel playing with us, it just wasn't enough to take these guys down. SOP won the game when Tim mistook the pitcher's mound for 2nd base; hey, honest mistake! They DO look a lot alike! Still a fun game!

I’d Hit That vs. Take a Wiff of This We had the lead for most of this game with our groove on. Well, for the most part, anyway. Daniel joined the team and helped us give his sister's team a run for their money. The beatings continued, though. Charm's rusher left an impressive welt on my leg (name?!)... I didn't know wiffleballs could do that! And we turned against ourselves when Ronnie unleashed one on Daniel and pelted him a little to close to "home" at the pitcher's mound with a line drive... Maybe he's trying to ensure against any little Reyes'??

- Besos! Becks

Sons of Pitches vs. Wiffle Crush Earlier in the evening we were told that Wiffle Crush had forfeited so after our second game, one of our players left. Then out of the blue, Reyes casually strolls up, "You ready to play?" uhhhh I guess. Poor Paula had already departed but we trudged on without her. Playing against a makeshift Wiffle Crush team, we were able to scrape together some runs via smart base running and timely home runs from Caroline (if you're counting, that's 3 for her on the night, 9 on the season) and Brian (his third of the night also). Brian also made several diving catches on the night in left field increasing his chances of winning Defensive Player of the Year.

Wiffskey Militia

Wiffle Crush

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No Write-Up Was Submitted

No Write-Up Was Submitted

on behalf of Wiffskey Militia

Diamonds in the Rough

Matt Strickler – I’d Hit That By day, he's a tireless public servant fighting for the rights of all Virginians in the hopes that they can play Wiffle Ball in peace and prosperity. On the field, he's a dynamic lefty racking up home runs and sacrificing his body for outs in the field. Matt enjoys live music, decorative gourds, and all things outdoors. He spends much of his time on or in the water working his side job as an oyster farmer, fishing on the Chesapeake Bay, or hugging dolphins and whales. So if his good looks and Wiffling skills aren't enough, ladies, wait until he catches you a delicious bass and introduces you to Flipper and Shamu. You've never seen so many panties drop as when he starts talking dolphin.

Andrew Wozniak – I’d Hit That Doctor Woznasty, to those who know him well, is a stud wiffleballer with a rapist's wit. When he's not stroking balls

deep, he's probably doing shit you couldn't understand in his job as a chemical oceanographer at ODU. The author of numerous scholarly papers, Andrew's dashing good looks and penchant for storytelling, practical joking, and well-

timed flatulence make him the life of any party. Ladies, if that doesn't make you swoon, this UVA grad's sensitive side and ginormous collection of Indie LPs surely will. In addition to music, Andrew enjoys the outdoors, Philly sports, and

Wordfeud. Oh, yeah, and he's from Delaware, mother f’er. 12

The Dirt

Wife Beater He’s the Ike Turner to Tina Turner, he’s the Chris Brown what’s your problem? I’m gonna teach Nadia some kung fu so she can drop kick you in the forehead next time you decide to throw your bat at her!

First Comes LOVE, then comes… These two are sooo cute! Sorry Jon and Jessica, I have to blow up ya’lls spot! Just look at them! This is def a match made in heaven… everyone seems to think so, just ask Amanda Elliott and Daniel Reyes! J on Mappin, you can thank me later for “hookin it up!” And I better be invited to the wedding!

Lady Crush

Guys…Gals…I don’t care what you are, we all seem to have a crush on Mrs. Caroline Stolle Gorham! She straight crushes the ball when she gets up to bat…seriously…EVERY time! This girl has skills and I can’t differentiate if I’m just mad jelly of her abilities or if I just have a crush on her! Great pick up Sons of Pitches! Keep her close, cause she’s a hot commodity in the wiffle ball community! I may have the baseball players on my team, but I don’t know if any of them can mash like her!

Good Luck Snipers! Rumors are true….last years champs, Take a Wiff of This, downfall to having a squad full of baseball players is they have to travel all over for baseball tournaments. Even though I am bitter that these boys will be gone and we won’t have a chance to defend our title…I wanna wish them good luck, and I wanna see ya’ll bring home the trophy!

will be forfeiting the rest of the seasons games and the Tournament due to lack of players. The only

to Rihanna….Cory Yates, Thursday night beat the living crap out of Nadia Kraft with a wiffle ball bat! He was merciless with his swings! Just kidding people, but he did throw the bat TWICE, and ended up hitting poor Nadia BOTH times…once in the arm and once in the boobie! Dang, Corey,

The Serial Photo Bomber Two weeks in a row Doug Werner has managed to photobomb Amanda Elliot and Daniel Reyes’ picture. They just want to have a cute picture of just the two of them, but somehow Doug always finds a way to get his pretty little face in there! Good job, buddy!

Hey Now! Watch your Hand!

Nice Boob grab Court!

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Social Calendar of Events

Charities & Sponsor Bar

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Food Specials

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Wiffle Ball

Well, since no one wants to read the official Backyard Sports Club Wiffle Ball rules, here is a simple Wiffle Ball for Dummies to help you out as the season starts out!

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When running to first base, remember to run across the outside base. The reason for this is so the first baseman doesn’t crush you trying to tag you out. However, if you’re running to 2nd, you can touch 1st base and book it to 2nd.

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Wiffle Ball

Well, since no one wants to read the official Backyard Sports Club Wiffle Ball rules, here is a simple Wiffle Ball for Dummies to help you out as the season starts out!

NO SLIDING! NO CLEATS!

NO GLASS BOTTLES! NO SMOKING!

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Wiffle Ball

MOST IMPORTANTLY….DO NOT, DO NOT THROW YOUR TRASH

BAGS WITH EMPTY CANS OR BOXES OF “ADULT BEVERAGES” INTO THE TRASH RECEPTICALS THEY HAVE AT THE FIELDS.

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These DO NOT Go Into the Trash Cans at the Fields:

The Field Manager has already warned us about this, and if he has to tell us one more time, he

will take away our drinking privileges at the fields…or worse, he can end up kicking us off these fields all together! So PLEASE take your trash bag full of cans, cups,

and boxes with you!!!

The Dos and DONTs

• DO NOT bring alcoholic beverages to the field….or at least be discreet about it! • DO clean up after yourselves! Unfortunately, maid service was cut out of Backyard

Sports Club’s budget due to the economy. • DO be friendly to the Refs: Please do not yell at them…just remember, you’re the one

that will look like a jerk if you yell at them. • DO NOT be “that guy.” We do not own Uno Chicago Grill or the premises around it; so

when you do something stupid, you’re not excluded from any laws just because you are wearing a Backyard Sports Club t-shirt.

• DO NOT leave a fellow wiffleballer behind; we take care of our own. Don’t let your

teammate drink like a champ and drive home. Find the closest decent looking guy/gal, introduce them, and have them go home together.

• DO NOT be bitter. It’s super important that if you end up having a “sleep over” with a

fellow wiffleballer, be cool with them for weeks to follow. We’re a small community, you’re gonna end up seeing them all season! When they drop you off at your car, hug it out, smile…and say “hi” the following week.

• DO NOT try to guess that persons name! • DO go to our sponsor Bar, Uno Chicago Grill. It’s what the cool kids are doing. • DO NOT fight! This is a fun league, HAVE FUN! If you fight, fun’s over for you, you’ll be

kicked out. • DO always wear your Backyard Sports Club shirt. I know laundry once a week may be

too much, so it’s cool if you go a couple weeks without washing….unless you’ve got bad B.O. like Robbie Wright!

• DO NOT smoke at the fields!

**DISCLAIMER** Nothing in the Backyard Sports Club Newsletter is to be taken seriously, except for the schedules and scores! Please send scores, recaps, pictures, questions, funny quotes, and/or any information that you would like to be added into the week’s newsletter to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com 19

HOTTIES

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Norfolk, Virginia Backyard Sports Club, Blue Diamond & Sandlot Divisions