taking the lid off leaflet
DESCRIPTION
Information for people living with another persons substance useTRANSCRIPT
The Taking the Lid Off Workbook, a resourcebook is available from the person who gaveyou this leaflet. It discusses how familymembers are affected and what helps inmore detail.
Safety First
Make sure you have a back-up plan forcrises. Someone you can turn to help you.
Don’t lecture, especially when they have beendrinking or using.
There may be calmer times when it is possible totalk about how their drinking or drug use isupsetting you.
It is ok to
love the
person but
not like
the problem
The important thing to remember is thatyou are not alone. Help is available. You cantalk to:
For adults:
• Al Anon ( Support for families and friendsof alcoholics)Telephone No: 028 90 682368
• The SamaritansTelephone No: 028 90 664422
For children andyoung people
• Contact Youth (Chill) 028 90 320092
• Opportunity Youth028 90 435810
• Chill has aYouthline serviceat0808 8088000
• Childline0800 1111
• Your schoolcounsellor orpastoral careteacher
For more information forlocal help visit
www.edact.org
Other useful websites arewww.al-anon.org
andwww.drugsalcohol.info
Takingthe Lid Off
For people living with someone’salcohol and drug misuse
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The information in this leaflet is for you ifsomeone you care about is misusing alcohol orother drugs. It will give you ideas that will help inwhat can be an extremely difficult situation.
When someonehas a problemwith alcohol ordrugs it affectseveryonearound them.The peoplemost affectedthen are thoseclosest to thatperson. If youare living withthis level ofstress, it isprobably havingan effect on you.It is commonthat you see whatis going on as “normal” and don’t realise theimpact it is having on you.
There are things you can do that help with all thestress and worry.
These include:
• Take the lid off it! Talking it through withsomeone you trust and who understandsalcohol and drug issues can help you makesense of what you are going through.
• Building the supports you can use.
• Looking at the ways in which you are copingand learn ways of coping that work for you.
• Learning about addiction and drug use.
• Remembering you are never to blame for yourparent’s or family member’s drinking or druguse.
• Looking after yourself. How? By…- Valuing yourself - Talking about your
feelings- Keeping in touch with
friends and loved ones- Learning new skills- Taking a break- Doing something
enjoyable - Keeping physically active- Eating well
• Everyone needs supportfrom others sometimes. Itis ok to ask for help. Ifthings get hard, reach outto others you know will behelpful.
One of the
most
destructive
things about
living with
alcohol or
drug misuse
is that you
never know
what’s coming
next.
It helps to talk.
Talking about it may
not change them, but it
can change you
If one of your parents or other family membershas a problem with alcohol or other drugs youmay …
As a young person
• Feel panicky, confused, mixed up• Bottle up what you are feeling• Try to hide it from your friends• Feel angry and upset at the drinkers way of
behaving, especially when you have been letdown or have promises broken
• Feel helpless and angry at yourself because youcan’t changethings
• Try to take ontheirresponsibilities
• Feel guilty thatsomehow youare to blame.You are not toblame!
As an adult
• Pretend the problem will go away or that itdoesn’t exist.
• Try to keep things going at home by trying tokeep things “normal”
• Protect the person drinking or using otherdrugs by hiding it from relatives, neighbours orwork.
• Never be sure what to expect next• Become convinced that you can get them to
change
So many people living with addiction feel soalone and isolated. If 4 million people acrossthe UK and Ireland are dependent onalcohol or other drugs, you can be sure youare not alone. There is someone else in yourclass, community or church who is livingwith this problem.
So what can you do?
An important issue is that you can’t makethem change.You can only change how you respond.
You didn’t cause it
You can’t control it
You can not cure it
But... you can cope
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