screamfree parenting 290613

7/28/2019 Screamfree Parenting 290613

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Screamfree

PARENTING

Raising Your Kids by Keeping

Your Cool


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Agenda

1. Dont Freak Out

2. What Kind of Parent Are You?

3. Parenting Is Not About Kids, Its AboutParents

4. Q & A


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Introduction

Traditional Behaviour Approaches toParenting

How to change children behaviour

change parenting tactics

Gerald Patterson (1982)

Fail to notice when children behave well

Pay too much attention to negative

behaviours

Makes empty threats or escalating

demands on children


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Introduction

Missing Link

Parent thoughts and feelings

ACT Model of ParentingPhilosophyThoughts and Feelings areHeart of how you perceive and respond

to your child

- Notice thoughts and Feelings(Mindfulness)


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Introduction

Accept and Aware

Choose

Take Action


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Dont Freak Out

AnxiousCalming all our reactiveresponses to this anxiety

Suggestion

Put a Fence Around your Worries

Create a Pause Between Action and

Reaction

1 Pre-temper indicators

2 Pause


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What Kind of Parent

Are You? Fundamental Shift

Not about Children. Its about Parent

Typical Parenting StyleAuthoritarian Obedient & Skilled in life or very rebellious

Less Happiness

Permissive Pretty Unhappy as adults

More difficulties with authority figures


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What Kind of Parent

Are You? Authoritative

Clear Rules & Fair

Calm & Safe

Successful in Life

Parenting Style Quiz


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Parenting Style

34 Points

You are in the Too Hard Zone. Rules are

very important to you and strictness is a

good thing. Although you might get shortterm compliance, the relationship is

beginning to suffer and long term

performance is not good


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Parenting Style

57 Points

You are in the Just Right Zone, or the

sweet spot. You have found a way to stay

in the middle during tough times and canstay focused even when your child is

trying to use excuses


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What Kind of Parent

Am I The Calm Parent

The Anxious Parent

The Angry Parent The Supportive Parent

The Blaming Parent

The Consultant The Perfectionist

The Boss


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Not About Kids,

Its About Parents Are your children something you can

control

Even if you could control your kidsshould you?

What is its not the kids who are out ofcontrol


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Biggest Enemy

Biggest Struggle as Parents

Not with television, computer games

Not with bad influences

Own emotional reactivity

Where does emotional reactivitycome from?

What can we do about it


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Are we responsible for our children?

You need to be in control of the thingsyou can control.

Starts and End with You

You are responsible to your children

screamfree parenting 290613

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