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LIVING NOW, LOOKING UP

+simple summer salads, how to create edible

Valentine’s hearts and an organised

gift drawer

TO ADOPT OR NOTJoin the conversation

Marriage + baby = three’s

a crowd?

2013 is the year to:

BE WISE WITH YOUR FINANCES (P11)

BANISH BUSYNESS (P17)

MANAGE YOUR TIME WELL (P20)

Combating fear... In a crime-filled land

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Meet the model:

Courtney Jonas

Courtney is a 23

year-old Capetonian

gospel music singer

and songwriter,

whose career has

soared in the last

few years and looks

set to only get

brighter. “I want my

music to create an

atmosphere where

people can come,

open their hearts

to God and not feel

judged in any way,”

said Courtney. “I

want to sing to all

the lost, broken-

hearted, sad, happy

and vibrant people

out there. Everyone

deserves to have a

close relationship

with God and hear

His voice. I want

to grow stronger

each year by HIS

grace, and be HIS

instrument in this

world”. Read more

about Courtney’s

musical journey on

page 41.

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Reflect The adoption conversation........................................................p21

Living in fear – the South African experience...................p25

Bringing a baby into your marriage –

is three a crowd?..............................................................................p29

Refresh *Your look *Your home *Your plate Gift drawer essentials for an organised year ahead.........p5

Face to face with fashionista Mosa Mokuena......................p9

Simple summer salads – healthy and delicious................p31

RenewGetting to grips with your finances in 2013..........................p11

Busyness: can it be banished?..................................................p17

RedeemA day in the life of Kenyan missionary Loki Swanepoel..........p39

Relax How to make fondant Valentine’s hearts....................................p35

Meet Jaci Mun-Gavin, a parent with a purpose.........................p37

Singing for the redeemed – a chat to Courtney Jonas............p41

RegularsEd’s letter.............................................................................................p3

Win.....................................................................................p6, p38, p42

Column..............................................................................................p43

CONTRIBUTORS

Editor

Nicole Cameron

Food Editor

Lara Demnitz

Lifestyle Contributor

Carin Bevan

Features Writers

Dalene Reyburn

Kate Motaung

Liza Ender

Layout

Stevette de Wit

CONTENTS

EDITOR’S LETTER

It’s the New Year and no doubt we’re full of

resolutions to eat better, exercise better, organise

better...basically BE better in general! While

the chances are slim that we’ll do a full 180

degree turn in areas of our lives where we battle

(probably about as slim as one needs to be to

fit into those skinny jeans – I speak for myself

here) there’s no harm in setting some goals for

improvement and arming ourselves with tools

that’ll help us get there. On page 11 you’ll find

some money management tips for the year

ahead, useful if you’ve been looking to get to

grips with a godly view on your finances. Then on

page 17 the concept of “busyness” is discussed –

how many of us ended 2012 feeling exhausted,

stressed and in desperate need of a holiday?

Perhaps now’s a chance to reflect on how we

manage our time and prioritise the things that

really matter.

Kate Motaung digs into some meaty topics this

issue, be sure to read and be challenged by her

piece The Adoption Conversation on page 21,

as well as Living in Fear on page 25, where she

reflects on how South African Christians should

respond to the desire for safety in a crime-

ravaged land like our own. These are both areas

where our attitudes and motivations have to look

different to those of unbelievers, if we profess

to believe the gospel of Jesus Christ. Personally,

I’m very interested in Liza Ender’s article on page

29, looking at the changes a baby brings to one’s

marriage – with our first little one due towards

the end of March, Lord willing, I’m relying on

God’s grace to ensure three doesn’t become

a crowd.

With motherhood on the imminent horizon, as

well as some other solid reasons, Radiant’s format

will change to more of a webzine look-and-feel

over the next few months. The magazine layout is

a concept that I am passionate about, and I hope

to return to it down the line, hopefully supported

by a greater readership and advertising base.

A print version of Radiant is very much a long-

term hope and dream! Please keep an eye on the

website www.radiantmag.co.za for changes.

Happy 2013!

Nicole

Third edition. January 2013

© Radiant Magazine 2012

CONTACT DETAILS

Tel: 084 301 6860

nicole@radiantmag.co.za

Follow us on Facebook and Twitter (@radiantmagazine)

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MEET THE TEAM THESE ARE THE VERY VALUABLE CONTRIBUTORS WHO ARE REGULARLY INVOLVED IN RADIANT:

CARIN BEVAN

Carin Bevan lives in Muizenberg with her husband Thomas, a schnoodle (cross schnauzer poodle) named Poppy and the new apple of her eye, her baby boy Jamie. She blogs about motherhood, crafts and pretty things and loves baking, knitting, taking pictures with her toy camera and having Gilmore Girls and Doctor Who DVD-marathons. She also runs a website called VintageMedia.co.za, where she writes about South African TV series from the 70s and 80s. Follow her on Twitter: @handinherpocket.

KATE MOTAUNG

Kate Motaung grew up on the shores of Lake Michigan and has lived in Cape Town for the past ten years. She spends her days relying on the

grace of God to support her South African husband in his ministry and homeschool their three children. Kate writes for the webzine Ungrind

(www.ungrind.org) and has contributed to MOPS, Young Disciple and (In)Courage.

DALENE REYBURN

Dalene Reyburn is passionate about God, people, and life in general. She is wife to Murray, mom to Cameron and Scott, daughter, sister, friend, aunt, teacher, learner, traveller, writer, adventurer, speaker, blogger, baker, hiker, bed snuggler, barefoot walker, letter writer, prayer warrior, tea drinker, home maker, book reader, chick-flick watcher, and lover of: Africa, music, trees, poetry, cappuccinos, seasons, stars, sunsets, dancing, golden retrievers and catching trains in foreign countries. You can check out her blogs Growing younger on the inside and Celebrating Life, or you can follow her on Twitter: @deereyburn.

LARA DEMNITZ

Having studied as a chef in Stellenbosch, Lara pursued her career overseas, working in London, and Italy. She currently lives at home in

Cape Town, dividing her time between cooking and working as a part time Aftercare Teacher. She is also the author of the cooking blog, How to cook

an Elephant (www.cookanelephant.blogspot.com)

LIZA ENDER

Married to an amazing man, who happens to be a minister, and mommy to two sweet little girls, there is seldom a dull moment in this house! I teach a music group for babies and toddlers; ‘Wriggle & Rhyme’, once a week and look after student girls and the young moms in our church community. Love living in Cape Town, writing, reading, running, cooking (…not of the

fish finger variety so much…) cups of tea and chocolate!

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With a drawer full of these gift goodies you can turn any present into something fun

and impressive. By Carin Bevan

Gift wrapping paper

Brown paper

Tissue paper

An assortment of gift bags, boxes and tins

Washi, deco and fabric tape

GET READY FOR A YEAR’S WORTH OF GIFT GIVING WITH THESE GIFT DRAWER BASICS:

GIFT DRAWER

EssentialsGIFT WRAPPING ESSENTIALS

Washi tape has recently become very popular in South Africa and is now quite easy to find. It’s a Japanese masking tape made from rice paper and comes in many colours and designs. You’ll find it at Typo or at one of these online shops:

In Good Company: http://www.heartandhome.co.za/ Love Letters Stationery and Gifts: http://www.lovelettersstationery.co.za/ Paper Peony: http://paperpeony.co.za/washitape/Washi Tape: http://washitape.co.za/ We Heart This: http://we-heart-this.com/

Deco and fabric tape haven’t yet had their big break on our shores, but you can easily order it from overseas. Fabric tape is made from fabrics such as cotton and lace. Deco tape is usually made from plastic and tends to have stronger colours than washi tape. It’s also more sticky, which makes it better if you’re using tissue paper or fabric.

You’ll find deco and fabric tape at Yozocraft (with very reasonable shipping rates): (http://www.yozocraft.com/) and on Etsy (http://www.etsy.com)

Washi tape and deco tape Sticky tape is a gift-wrapping must-have– and not simply to stick the loose ends of wrapping paper together. Use washi tape, deco tape or fabric tape to decorate gift paper, tags, cards and the gifts themselves.

CLOCKWISE FROM TOP LEFT: Pink Diagonal Stripe tape: R28 from Washi Tape. Cotton fabric tape: $2 from Yozocraft. Red and Green Birds and Florals tape: R28 from Washi Tape. Deco tape: Author’s own.

PunchesUse paper punches to make and decorate gift tags

or cards, or punch shapes from coloured paper to

make confetti. Look for them at craft shops or in the

scrapbooking section of your local stationery shop.

We found this heart punch and bee punch at the

Crazy Store for about R10 each.

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With a drawer full of these gift goodies you can turn any present into something fun

and impressive. By Carin Bevan

Gift wrapping paper

Brown paper

Tissue paper

An assortment of gift bags, boxes and tins

Washi, deco and fabric tape

Gift cards and tags

Ribbon

Paper punches

Stamps

Gift fillers

GET READY FOR A YEAR’S WORTH OF GIFT GIVING WITH THESE GIFT DRAWER BASICS:

GIFT DRAWER

Essentials

Washi tape has recently become very popular in South Africa and is now quite easy to find. It’s a Japanese masking tape made from rice paper and comes in many colours and designs. You’ll find it at Typo or at one of these online shops:

In Good Company: http://www.heartandhome.co.za/ Love Letters Stationery and Gifts: http://www.lovelettersstationery.co.za/ Paper Peony: http://paperpeony.co.za/washitape/Washi Tape: http://washitape.co.za/ We Heart This: http://we-heart-this.com/

Deco and fabric tape haven’t yet had their big break on our shores, but you can easily order it from overseas. Fabric tape is made from fabrics such as cotton and lace. Deco tape is usually made from plastic and tends to have stronger colours than washi tape. It’s also more sticky, which makes it better if you’re using tissue paper or fabric.

You’ll find deco and fabric tape at Yozocraft (with very reasonable shipping rates): (http://www.yozocraft.com/) and on Etsy (http://www.etsy.com)

StampsThis sweet set has a stamp for every occasion,

whether it’s a birthday, wedding, Valentine’s Day or

a simple coffee date. Use them on wrapping paper,

gift tags or cards. Love Diary Stamp Set: $6.80

from Yozocraft.

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Giveaway!!Get your gift drawer off to a good start. We’re giving away a gift-wrapping kit with 4 deco tape rolls, ribbon, 10 small brown paper gift bags and 10 manila tags - plus a little surprise or two. To win, email nicole@radiantmag.co.za with GIFT DRAWER in the subject line. Competition closes 28 February.

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Cards and tagsFill your gift drawer with a variety of cards and gift

tags and you’ll be good to go whatever the occasion.

1 Clever, cute and eco-friendly to boot: After their tagging job is done, these plantable gift tags will grow into a basil or rocket plant. R100 for 12 from

Love Letters Stationery.

2 These chalkboard gift tags are loads of fun – and can be reused! Chalkboard Heart: R5 from In Good Company.

3 This set of 18 cards and envelopes comes in a tin and is perfect for any occasion. R155 from Love Letters Stationery.

4 Turn gifts for overseas friends into keepsakes with these Karoo inspired gift tags: R16 per pair from PaperPeony.

5 Use your punches, tape, ribbon and stamps to turn ordinary manila tags into one-of-a-kind gift tags. You can buy these in

bulk or individually at stationery shops such as The Write Shoppe or Walton’s.

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GIFT FILLERS

Make sure you have a bunch of little gifts in your

drawer for those last-minute birthday party invites!

Gift fillers are like stocking fillers: small presents

that can make a more generic gift like flowers,

chocolates or gift vouchers seem just that much

more special!

STOCKISTSCrazy Store: http://www.crazystore.co.za/

Etsy: http://www.etsy.com/

In Good Company: http://www.heartandhome.co.za/

Love Letters Stationery and Gifts: http://www.lovelettersstationery.co.za/

Mr. Price Home: http://www.mrpricehome.com/

Nicoletta: http://www.nicoletta.co.za/

PaperPeony: http://paperpeony.co.za/washitape/

Waltons: http://www.waltons.co.za/

Washi Tape: http://washitape.co.za/

We Heart This: http://we-heart-this.com/

The Write Shoppe: http://www.thewriteshoppe.co.za/

Yozocraft: http://www.yozocraft.com/

1 Tape one of these pretty Flying Teacup Decorations to the wrapping paper or gift bag: R50 from In Good Company.

2 Write edible notes to complement your gift. This packet of Love Notes includes 15 heart-shaped wafers and a food colouring marker: R35 from Nicoletta’s online store. (We’ve also spotted these at Pick ‘n Pay for slightly more).

3 Fill a pretty tiny tin with sweeties, buttons, or little notes: $3 from Yozocraft.

4 Tie these heart-shaped cookie cutters to a bunch of flowers with a cheerful ribbon. Or use them to make your own conversation hearts – see our craft project for instructions. Set of 5 cookie cutters, R19.99 from Mr Price Home.

5 Use these colourful erasers as a gift filler with a cute notebook and pencils. Set of 12 Fun Erasers: R30 from In Good Company.

6 Slip a gift voucher into one of these lovely fabric-covered card pockets: $5.25 from Yozocraft.

STOCKISTSCrazy Store: http://www.crazystore.co.za/

Etsy: http://www.etsy.com/

In Good Company: http://www.heartandhome.co.za/

Love Letters Stationery and Gifts: http://www.lovelettersstationery.co.za/

Mr. Price Home: http://www.mrpricehome.com/

Nicoletta: http://www.nicoletta.co.za/

PaperPeony: http://paperpeony.co.za/washitape/

Waltons: http://www.waltons.co.za/

Washi Tape: http://washitape.co.za/

We Heart This: http://we-heart-this.com/

The Write Shoppe: http://www.thewriteshoppe.co.za/

Yozocraft: http://www.yozocraft.com/

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Mosa Mokuena is a Free state born, Jozi-based Fashion designer who established her label MosewaMosa in 2006. radiant chats to her about inspiration, being a christian in a tough industry, and what 2013 holds in store – both For

her brand and on the worldwide Fashion scene...photography by siMon deiner

FACE TO FACE WITH MOSEWAMOSA

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Where do you draW inspiration from for your designs?

I’m mostly inspired by nature. I’m also blessed in that my work has taken me all over the world and having a family that lives overseas has allowed me to explore the world all the more. As a result I’m inspired by the countries that I visit and the diversity of culture that I see there. Countries like Morocco and Turkey stand out for me, and Paris and New York are two cities that are an obvious source of inspiration for me.

is it difficult to be a christian Woman in the fashion industry? What are some of the challenges/opportunities you come across?

The fashion industry like any industry has its own pros and cons. Besides all the beauty and creativity coming out of it, it is fuelled by sex, drugs, alcohol, etc. My identity as a Christian really helps me to stay grounded. It reminds me of who I am and who I am here to serve and that in itself helps me keep my eye on the ball. I’m not perfect but I strive to remain true to who I am. Yes, I work hard to please my clients, but above all I strive to honour God in what I do.

What are your hopes and plans for moseWamosa in 2013?

In the year to come my focus remains growing the business from the ground up and continuing to build the foundation. I’ll be launching a more generic brand (still under MosewaMosa) that will house a commercial line targeted at working women aged

between 25 and 45. I have identified retail spaces that reflect the brand’s identity; I’ve learnt from previous retail spaces I supplied that you’ve got to know exactly where you want to place your brand in the market and not compromise on that. MosewaMosa will be reserved for bespoke services to our private clientele. At the moment I sell my clothing from my showroom in downtown Johannesburg on 3 Loveday Street.

What are some fashion must-haves for the season ahead?

Whenever I’m asked this question I respond that personally I don’t follow trends! I’m an artist first and foremost, and work to set trends rather than mimic them. The MosewaMosa brand is classic and timeless, with a focus on ethereal elegance; quite different from what is out there at the moment. To remain relevant we do however do our research on upcoming trends and try to incorporate them into our own language. For those wanting to keep up with trends everything continues to be big, bright and ostentatious from clothing right up to shoes, accessories and even nails. Prints and florals still continue to be enormous and take on different mediums such as digital and photographic. So you may want to stock up on printed dresses, anything that is coral and gold, and chunky and bold accessories, as this will continue beyond this year. After all this I still want to say, find your own style that complements your character and tweak it here and there to add fun to your wardrobe and your life.

To see more MosewaMosa creations, visit www.mosewamosa.co.za

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T TOP MONEY MANAGEMENT

TIPS FOR

2013They may not be quick fixes, but getting

your mind around these points will help you to establish good practices that honour

God and best serve His purposes...By Nicole Cameron

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1 UNDERSTAND YOUR MONEY WORLD-VIEW

Our relationship to money is very complex – in most cases

we have grown up with a certain understanding, either as a

result of our parents’ model or as a reaction against their

principles. We define ourselves as “spenders” or “savers”

and, in both instances, are quick to fall into the trap of

following the world’s view that our money is our own.

It’s little wonder; when we are bombarded by advertisers

telling us that this is the case, and that true satisfaction

is possible through consumption (or wise investment). We

are happy to give a percentage of our income for ministry

purposes, but all too often simply add a Christian gloss to

a view of money that looks no different from that of our

unsaved friends and family. Getting to grips with a godly

view of money starts with reflecting deeply on whether we

really believe that God owns everything, that He provides

for all our needs and that we are living for the new

creation, where we’ll leave behind all the possessions we

stashed up on earth.

2 TEST YOUR SPENDING HABITS AND WHAT THEY REVEAL We may believe the biblical view in theory, but in practice

it may look a little different. In The Treasure Principle

Randy Alcorn says Jesus put such an emphasis on money

and possessions (15% of everything Christ said relates

to this topic) because there’s a fundamental connection

between our spiritual lives and how we think about and

handle money. Is your heart deceiving you? Ash Carter

(author of The Money Mentor) points out that the only

reason advertising works is because we are sinful – “at

every point in history, human beings have looked to their

harvests, their families, their trinkets and their toys to fill

the deep longing in their hearts that can only be filled by

a relationship with God”. Diagnose where your heart really

lies by asking these kinds of questions: How would I feel

about losing X (your job, for example)? If I had to choose

between X and Y, which would I give up? How do I actually

spend 168 hours a week?

Where does the money

from my salary really go?

(Recording these details

over a two-month period

may reveal a surprising

reality). And ultimately, ‘In

100 million years, will it

matter that I...?’

3 KNOW GOD’S PRIORITIES FOR YOUR MONEY

Fortunately, the Bible

is not quiet about how

we should order our

priorities in order to reflect

God’s concerns and be

responsible stewards of the

limited financial resources

He provides us with. Carter

defines our responsibilities

as starting with providing

for our own needs (so that

we are not a burden to

others), then for those of

our family (this includes

our parents, whether

they are believers or not)

and then the local church

followed by the global

church. Remember that all-

important differentiation

between needs and wants

when it comes to looking

after ourselves and our

families! Ultimately, the

more we appreciate the

ongoing generosity of God

to us, the more willing we

will be to give freely from

all that we already have

(2 Corinthians 9).

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4 GET OUT OF DEBT This is when it starts to get practical. Most developed

countries are struggling with massive national and

personal debts. Living on credit, through unsecured loans

(where you have not pledged an asset of equal value)

may be “manageable” if you can maintain the monthly

payments, but it reveals the underlying problem of living

beyond one’s means and the strong possibility of an

attitude towards money that is not honouring to God. If

you find yourself in this situation, the starting point is to

make a list of what your debts are, what they cost you over

a year, and whether you have any items that you can sell in

order to reduce these loans. Develop a strategy to pay off

the most expensive debts first – it may require a change in

lifestyle to free up more money to get out of debt quicker.

The advice of a professional can be invaluable here.

5 BREAK DOWN YOUR EXPENDITURE The Money Mentor divides spending up into five

headings: fixed necessary expenditure (essential basic,

unavoidable costs - rent, electricity, water etc), flexible

necessary expenditure (these costs can change from

month to month, for example groceries, depending on

our consumption habits), long-term financial planning (we

need to make provision for our retirement), giving (Randy

Alcorn recommends thinking of tithing as training wheels

to get you going: “Start at 10% of income, and then ramp

up your giving from there, removing the stabilisers”) and

variable discretionary expenditure (the category that

covers everything not listed above; and also the easiest to

overspend in). Information is power, so once you are clear

on the above (in practice, not just on paper) you can start

planning to re-order the things in your financial matters

that you are not happy with.

6 MAKE A PLANThis is where the word budget comes in! To design an

annual budget, set up a spreadsheet with the next twelve

months across the top and your categories down the

left-hand side. Put the income at the top, and expenses

underneath, and using your records, estimate what you

will spend in the year to come. Remember that plans

change, so be prepared to be flexible. Also build in

contingencies – there are always surprise expenses! Try to

think through one-off items that will occur, for example, a

holiday, as well as events like Christmas and birthdays that

will predictably break the regular pattern.

7 THINK THROUGH FUTURE INVESTMENTS CAREFULLYBear in mind that all

investments need to

deliver returns. This is the

case even when it comes

to things like education,

where we can be tempted

to put sound financial

practices to one side for

the sake of emotional

or other reasons. While

there are many non-

financial reasons to invest

in your children’s tertiary

education, at the end of

the day their subsequent

career needs to yield an

appropriate return.

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10 KEEP RECORDS Making real progress

and change in the area of

personal finance requires

a long time – so commit

to the long haul and keep

going as you started.

This means keeping your

spreadsheet up to date,

even when it seems that

watching paint dry would

be a more entertaining

alternative. Over time,

you’ll develop a system

that works for you, but

don’t expect it to be

instinctive. And don’t be

too hard on yourself when

you don’t it right 100%.

Success starts with that

initial step – all the best for

a disciplined and rewarding

financial year ahead!

(Insights from this piece were taken from Ash Carter’s book ‘The Money Mentor’ and Randy Alcorn’s ‘Treasure Principle’ – both recommended for further reading.)

8 REMEMBER CASH IS KEY

Any businessman knows that running out of cash spells

disaster – and it’s the same when it comes to personal

budgeting. Be sure to understand how your cash flows so

that there is no point in the month when your expenses

are more than the amount in your bank account, despite

the theoretical availability of the money at a later point in

the month.

9 INCREASE GIVING AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY Remember that our goal is to serve Jesus with our whole

lives, so as soon as you receive an increase in income,

or an unexpected bonus, consider how it can be used

generously. Budgets are useful but at the end of the day

they are simply tools to help free up more money for

giving.

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What are some of the budgeting tips you’ve learnt over the years that you’d like to share with other women? My husband has been a great help to me in this area. I do most of the shopping,

but he helps me by breaking down the exact amounts of how much we can spend in

certain areas. So, for example, I try to do one big, monthly shop for the main staples

(toilet paper, flour, sugar, etc.), then do one additional shop per week to top up on

bread, fruit, milk, etc. We’ve worked out how much we can afford to spend for each

of these, so I know from week to week what my limitations are. It also helps to keep

cash in envelopes for each week, so there are visible, tangible banknotes in hand

to keep me from going over budget on the credit card. We’ve also tried to use our

credit card more like a debit card - depositing money into the account each month

and using what’s actually in there, to avoid going into debt and accruing interest.

How do you manage the challenge of feeding, clothing and entertaining a large family on a tight budget?The Lord has been incredibly good to us in this area. I think this is what I appreciate

about the body of Christ in South Africa...so many people are willing to share

possessions and pass things on that they’re not using anymore. If we are honest and

humble about our needs, people have been more than willing to pitch in and help

out. Sure, we’ve had to say ‘no’ to several things that other families may get to enjoy,

but we make the most of the things we can afford. For example, instead of going out

for pizza and a movie, we may make pizza at home and take out a free DVD from the

library to watch together as a family. Or we may not go to the Spur whenever we’d

like to, but now and then we may take advantage of Spur’s Monday special with two-

for-one burgers. We’ve tried to teach our kids not to complain that they don’t get to

choose whatever they want from the menu, but to be grateful for whatever they do get.

When it comes to gifting and hospitality, do you have any advice for cutting costs without giving gifts or meals that seem meagre?Don’t underestimate homemade baked goods! Find a handful of fail-proof recipes

that can stretch, buy a packet of pretty paper plates, some clear plastic bags and

some ribbon, and you’ve got a gift! Homemade goods are often more cost-effective,

and also show that you’ve put time and love into the gift. There are a few different

types of muffin mixes that are quite good. All you have to do is add oil, water and an

egg, and you can get 24 muffins for R18 instead of the pre-made six muffins for R18.

It’s just a matter of looking out for cost-effective options that are manageable with

your schedule and resources.

PASTORS’ WIVES WEIGH IN WITH THEIR BUDGETING ADVICE:

Kate Motaung, married to Kagiso and mom to Kabelo, Dineo and Caleb

What are your little saving secrets that help you through the month?

Carin Bevan Cash! I only put my week’s spending money in my wallet and make sure

I leave the credit card locked up. I think much harder about what I spend money on

when I have to take out cash.

Janice Cameron Save your till slips!

Natalie Mayer (1) Keep a little notebook in your handbag, and write down what

you’ve spent at the end of every day. Seeing how fast it adds up helps me to put the

brakes on spending! (2) Train yourself to wait a month (or even more) before buying

something you want. After that, you will be able to see whether you actually need the

item or whether it was just a passing fancy. Say no to impulse buys!

WHAT READERS SAY:

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Grocery prices seem to be soaring on a daily basis. What practical steps can women take to save in this area?

I’ve found that there are a lot of practical cost–cutting steps that one can take.

Here are some of my favourites:

Get the cheapest. Although it might be a little difficult to branch out sometimes (especially

if you’ve always bought a particular brand), it’s worth looking out for the

cheapest makes of each item. These can change as prices go up, so it’s good

to check every time. If you find that you don’t like that brand, you can always

try something different next time – but with many things, it won’t make much

difference, if any, and you’ll be surprised how much you can save this way. This

even can apply to buying different items at different shops. Our favourite cereal

is cheapest at a shop very near to us – so we always buy it there, although I do

most groceries elsewhere. Of course, there is no problem with having certain

non-negotiables – for us, tea fits into this category!

Look for speciaLs. I love specials and sales! The free local newspapers usually have specials pages

for at least a couple of grocery shops – a good idea is to go through them and

tick off (or write down) the items you want, and to use that list the next time you

go shopping. You’ll find you can save quite a lot that way. I also find it’s worth

glancing through the aisles while at the shop, for specials that one might have

missed. But bear in mind-a deal is not a deal unless you wanted it in the first

place!

stock up. This follows on from the previous point. Some items come on special less

frequently than others –and quite soon you’ll get a feel for how often they do.

If you think you’ll run out before the next special, try to stock up to carry you

through. For example, our favourite tea has gone up in the past few years, but

every few months it is available at several Rands less than usual. By buying a

couple of boxes whenever it’s cheap, I’ve found that the tea we drink costs me

the same as it did about three years ago (most gratifying!). Stocking up does

require spending a bit extra to start off with, as you’re buying more than you

need for that month– so depending on your budget, you might want to start

slowly. However, it very quickly starts paying off. You may be stocking up on

cheese this month, but you don’t need to buy chicken or coffee, as you bought

those last month.

Buy marked-down Goods. Checkers has a wonderful system of selling off vegetables and baked goods

cheaply once they reach their ‘sell-by’ date. This might sound a little off-putting

– but bear in mind that they can’t sell ‘off’ produce, so just after the sell-by date

the vegetables are usually still fine. I find that they can last about a week.

Beware the enemies of savinG! Everyone has her own particular one. One notorious pitfall is impulse buying. If

this is a temptation, it’s very important to make a list, and to avoid the tempting

aisles as far as possible. If necessary, avoid malls! ‘False economy’ can also be

a threat. If one is travelling 10 km extra to save a rand... it might be worth re-

evaluating!

avoid wastaGe. This is fairly self-evident, but wastage is a thief of money. So try not to let

anything go off, and see if you can find creative ways to find a use for geriatric

groceries. If milk goes a little sour, boiling it will either extend its life briefly, or

curdle it (in which case it can be used in rusks).

Camilla Marx, married to Bryan.

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BANISHING THE BUSYNESSIs there a way to enjoy a balanced and restful year ahead? By Nicole Cameron

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HURRY SICKNESS

In his book The Busy Christian’s Guide to Busyness, Tim Chester

reminds us that God

doesn’t make mistakes –

24 hours a day were part

of the world God declared

very good. “The problem

is not that there isn’t

enough time for what we

want to do, the problem is

that we’re trying to do too

much. We haven’t come to

terms with the fact that

we are finite and limited,”

he says. He goes on to

say that busyness in itself

isn’t bad, and that most

of us enjoy doing a lot of

things, and when we feel

we can cope then we are

content in our busyness;

it is only when we try to

do more than we can that

we feel stressed about the

extra demands. It’s at that

point that our whole lives

can feel crammed, when

really it’s just a few things

beyond what we can cope

with that makes everything

feel impossible. “Here’s

a foundational truth,”

says Chester. “God does

not expect us to do more

than we can. So the key

question is: why are you

trying to do more than

you can?”

More often than not, it

is because we are slaves

to our sinful desires that

drives us to “idolatrous

busyness” that ultimately

causes harm, in our bodies,

our families, our churches

and in our relationship

with God. What reason

can you give for the last

reason you said “yes” to a

request instead of “no”?

And what truth should

encounter the false belief

beneath it? Blogger Dalene

Reyburn puts it this way:

“It’s easy to use busyness

as a cover – to shroud

ourselves in a feel-good

kind of ‘I’m-so-busy-I-must-

be-successful aura. It’s also

easy to develop a Messiah

complex – for example,

‘These people need me. I

have to be there/do this/

etc’ and to forget that we

are least like the Messiah

when we are frazzled and

overwrought.”

Our lives are about putting

the Kingdom of God first

and being faithful with

the time we’ve been

given – if we’re going

to be measured by our

faithfulness why do we

put so much emphasis

on achieving for the sake

of our pride and others’

approval? The sad reality,

Chester points out, is

that Christians can be

the busiest people of all

because we want to have it

all. “We have a foot in both

camps – we have better

things to do – gospel,

kingdom things, but we

also want the trappings of

this world. We work hard

for the treasure of heaven.

But we also work hard for

the treasure of earth. So

we’re running around twice

as much as non-believers.

We want God’s life, but we

want the good life too.”

For me, getting to the end of 2012 felt like a mad

dash to the finishing line. And when I chatted

to friends they felt exactly the same way – a

crazy set of to-do lists combined with an attitude of

perseverance would surely see us survive till “break-

up day” and the promise of a few weeks in the sun

with family and festive celebrations – a chance to rest

and recover from a year that was just way too busy,

and to reflect on how next year would be so very

different. Only problem is, I’d convinced myself of that

very notion exactly a year ago, and invariably the year

before that.

Most people feel like their lives are over-full. And as

Christians, we have even more commitments when

we consider church meetings, Bible study, building

community and serving the needy – how can we

possibly balance time between work, friends and

family and church life? Many of us feel trapped in our

lifestyles; like we know too many people to keep up with

properly and that we take on too much most of the

time. Clearly, there’s a problem, and as is most often

the case, the solution lies not in finding an extra hour in

the day, but in getting to the heart of the issue...

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ACHIEVING A WORK-LIFE BALANCE

Once we’ve explored the deeper, darker side of our

busyness, we’d do well to remember the very practical

outline the Bible gives to attain what many of us see as the

holy grail – that elusive work-life balance. God’s solution:

The Sabbath pattern of working and doing chores in six

days and having one day totally devoted to rest. While

holidays are a great opportunity to enjoy God’s creation

and spend time with people, they are in fact quite a recent

thing – it’s only in the past hundred years that most people

have received paid leave. We often feel like we “need”

our holiday because our lives are so out of balance,

whereas it’s not a sustainable solution – one in three

people find the days before a holiday the most stressful

of the year, and it hardly takes a week back at work for

the holiday glow to have faded completely, with the grim

prospect of 350 days of stress to get through before the

next respite. We can even spread this pattern up over

What one thing do you do every day that brings you rest?I make a point of making an arrangement to meet a friend from work in the

canteen for a quick chat and cold drink every day. Even if it’s only ten minutes,

it makes the world of difference to have a break and share the day’s struggles

with someone who understands – we can laugh about things that would

otherwise frustrate us and that re-energises me for the rest of the day.

What is your top time management tip?On a Sunday night I look at the week ahead and work out when I will have

some spare time and what I can get done in it. Because my free hours are so

limited due to work commitments I need to make it count – if I don’t plan ahead

I bumble through the week only to realise how much of it I’ve wasted. I’ll plan

things like how many birthdays I have in one month, and then allocate a spare

hour in the week to go to the shops to buy presents.

What one thing do you do every day that brings you rest?When I get home from school every day I make myself a cup of coffee and go

and savour it outside on my verandah. This is my “me time” before I hit the

afternoon routine of helping my kids with their homework and getting supper

ready.

What is your top time management tip?Being organised is everything. I try to get the kids to have their bags packed

and lay out their school clothes the night before. I have a schedule of extra-

mural activities so I know what time everyone needs to be fetched etc.

Planning ahead is the only way to keep things running smoothly.

a lifetime – 40 years of

work in preparation for a

retirement of leisure. Give

yourself the freedom of

a day of play – whatever

that might constitute in

your mind -preferably

without technology and a

dependence on too much

leisure “consumption”. You

can also try to bring a few

activities/habits into your

day or week that you find

restorative; for example

going for a brisk walk

in the early evenings or

booking yourself in for the

odd facial or massage.

BUSY READERS GIVE THEIR TOP TIPS FOR KEEPING STRESS AT BAY:

Blanche Cupido, 33, cardiologist at Groote Schuur Hospital, Cape Town

Caroline Fredericks, 39, teacher at Kyalami Preparatory, Gauteng, and mom to Cameron (11), Matthew (8) and Ethan (5).

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As Christians, we are meant to be “poured out” and busy

– we are made to serve God and other people. It’s easy to

mistake a desire for time-out with a desire to withdraw

from responsibility and pamper ourselves – when we’re

surrounded by a culture of self-indulgence we can fall into

the trap of believing we deserve unfettered “me time”. But

it’s just as easy to spiral into over-commitment and stress

EFFECTIVE TIME MANAGEMENT

Sometimes we’re too busy because we simply don’t manage our time well. Effective time

management is the subject of many books, and most will agree that it’s important to

work out how you spend your time, and then re-evaluate how this reflects against your

priorities. The book Brilliant Time Management (Michael Clayton, Prentice Hall 2011)

outlines six fundamentals of time management. They are:

COMMUNICATION Whether it’s in the workplace or at home, failing to communicate why, when or how

you are doing something can be a big time waster. Clayton says that the secret to good communication

is simple: always take responsibility for your communication – say to yourself that it is your job to ensure

that others understand what you are saying, or that you understand what they are saying.

DISCIPLINE Discipline is about remembering what you must not forget, planning what must go well,

reviewing what you must learn from and organising what must not get lost. It’s about making the effort

to do things that are easy, when you’d rather do nothing at all. It’s important to establish routines that

work – after ten to twenty times of repetition, they’ll become a habit.

MEMORY Your memory will help you to get done the things you need to do before they become so

pressing that you feel they are taking over control. A bad memory is no excuse these days what with the

many tools available to aid recall.

PLANNING Plans will change, but planning is indispensable as this process prepares you to understand

what is going on and what the options are. Planning is the mark of the proactive person.

REVIEW Rather than work at something doggedly, it’s more effective to take breaks and review your

progress, weighing it up against your priorities and being honest about successes, failures, and the

overall process.

ORGANISATION An important part of being organised is being tidy, but be sure to apply your “own

sort” of tidy – some people need regimented neatness, while others prefer the cosy familiarity of objects

that yet others would deem clutter. Being organised will help you look forward to tasks without that

foreboding sense of “it’s such a mess”.

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Insights for this piece were gleaned from:

THE BUSY CHRISTIAN’S GUIDE TO BUSYNESS

by Tim Chester

BRILLIANT TIME MANAGEMENT

by Mike Clayton

READ ALL ABOUT IT...

– let’s make 2013 the year

when we reflect honestly

on our priorities and make

the necessary changes in

our lives.

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Dave and Emma had been married for a handful of years

and already had two active children to show for it.

They were happy, and life was as smooth-sailing as it could

be with two toddlers underfoot. Yet at the back of their

minds, they both remembered a conversation they’d had

before they had said, “I do.”

“I’d love to adopt one day,” Emma had mused aloud to Dave

one sunny afternoon as they sat in peak-hour traffic.

“Really? Me too,” Dave affirmed.

Pleasantly surprised, Emma pushed gently, ““Even if we

already had biological children?”

“Yes, I could do that,” he’d replied, half-concentrating on

the road.

Now, four years later, the topic re-surfaced. “Now?” Emma

thought to herself. “Now, when our budget is already

stretched with two kids in nappies day and night?” But

she and her husband shared a common foundation – they

both trusted in an all-sovereign God, One whose timing

was always perfect. They began to pray about it, and even

began the application process at a local Christian adoption

agency. But life meandered on its way, day after day, like

a gentle, winding river. Then one day, they heard: A teen

mom had chosen their profile as the parents she wanted

for her newborn son. In just six days, they would become a

family of five.

Countless emotions elbowed at each other, fighting for a

place in the spotlight – excitement, fear, apprehension, joy.

Then nerves prevailed, and questions pelted their minds like

a hard, relentless rain: “What would he look like? How would

the other kids respond to having a new brother? How

would we feel about him? How would our extended family

react to the sudden addition?”

SEEKING WISDOM

Emma decided to use

the limited time she had

to enlist the advice of

experienced friends. One

morning after a church

function, she found herself

side-by-side washing dishes

with an adoptive mother

in their congregation. She

articulated her qualms

as best she could to her

new confidante, who

reassured her that she, too,

had experienced similar

misgivings before their own

adopted children had come

home.

The words that this kind,

gentle woman spoke to

Emma over soapsuds and

dishtowels stuck with her

for years to come. “As we

understood God’s love for

us and our own adoption

in Christ, adopting children

became a no-brainer! Our

mental barriers to adoption

were removed and it

became an outworking of

what we believe – ‘We love

because He first loved us’

(1 John 4:19) and Ephesians

THE ADOPTION CONVERSATION Is there an even better reason for Christians to adopt, beyond serving our broken society? By Kate Motaung

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5:5-6 – ‘In love He

predestined us for adoption

to sonship through Jesus

Christ, in accordance with

His pleasure and will— to the

praise of His glorious grace,

which He has freely given

us in the One he loves.’”

The truth and conviction

of scripture washed over

Emma like warm water

cleansing a clouded glass.

Suddenly she could clearly

see God’s big picture when

it came to adoption.

THE UNSPOKEN FEARS The woman at the sink

continued, confessing that

she, too, had wrestled with

similar fears about her

adopted children. Then

she concluded, “Ultimately,

we realised that God

would have prepared this

child for us from before

conception - because that’s

how sovereign He is! So we

needed to trust that He had

the child picked for us and

wouldn’t give us anything

we couldn’t trust and

depend on Him for. Also,

there were no guarantees

that our biological children

would be perfect -they may

well have inherited some

biological imperfections

from us. In the same way,

our children by adoption

may not have our genetic

physical impediments like

needing glasses or having

eczema! We would love and

care for whoever God gave

us.”

God Himself had adopted

Emma into His eternal

family, on the pure basis

of His amazing grace, and

not because of anything

whatsoever that she had

done to earn or deserve it.

He hadn’t chosen her or set

His love upon her because

she was loveable – she

knew in her heart of hearts

that Romans 5:8 was true:

“…God demonstrated His

own love for us in this –

that while we were still

sinners, Christ died for

us.”

Yet what would it take for

Emma and Dave to set

aside their nervousness

about the future to

wholeheartedly imitate

the sacrifice that God had

made for them? Was it

even possible? Again,

another portion of scripture

popped into Emma’s mind

as she weighed out the

pros and cons: ‘…with God

all things are possible’

(Matthew 19:26).

MOULDING AND SHAPINGFeeling as though they

were indeed making the

right decision, Emma

decided to phone one

more friend, who had very

recently welcomed a one-

year-old boy into her home

in addition to their two

other biological children.

When Emma asked how

it was going, the friend

replied honestly, “We have

felt God’s sovereignty in

so many details helping

to reassure us that the

boy we have is just the

boy God wanted us to

have, which has given us

the strength to cope with

the early challenges and

up-and-down emotions.

By the grace of God, our

feelings are slowly but

surely catching up with our

commitment!”

As soon as Emma shared

the news with her friend

about their decision to

adopt, her friend was

“We are not the solution to the orphan

crisis, the cross is. It is the solution to

our crisis.” Dr. Russell Moore, author of Adopted for Life.

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ecstatic, but she did offer

this advice: “Remember

that God is our heavenly

Father who has good

purposes for our lives, to

make us more like Jesus

– trust His sovereign

hand and be willing to be

moulded!” Upon hanging

up the phone, Emma felt as

though she was ready for

whatever God had planned

for their family.

The next day, Dave

landed in a similar

conversation with another

dad, while pushing kids

simultaneously on the park

swings. The topic again

turned to the unknowns,

and the Christian man with

whom Dave was conversing

laid it out, plain and simple.

“Look,” he said frankly.

“It’s not your sense of noble

duty to society that’s going

to get you out of bed at

two o’clock in the morning

when the kid is crying after

a bad dream. It has to be –

it can only be – for the sake

of the gospel.”

Dave considered

these words of advice

thoughtfully, grateful for

the wealth of experience of

another Christian brother

who had already walked

the densely crowded path

that lay before him. But

what if it turned out to be

a disaster? What if it was

all just a big mistake? No,

they had to do it. After

all, they had the privilege

of having Christ in their

hearts and in their homes.

It would be selfish to keep

Him to themselves. But

surely they could rather

just volunteer their time

at an orphanage every

Saturday? Surely that

would make a difference,

right? It would make a

difference, but as another

parent had reminded them,

“discipleship takes place in

the home.” How could they

pass up this opportunity to

live out the love of Christ

on a daily basis to a child

who might not otherwise be

exposed to the gospel?

PART OF THE FAMILY Four days later, through

no small feat of God’s

provision, they met their

new son for the first time.

Both Emma and Dave were

overwhelmed by the way

they felt when they held

their new baby in their

arms for the first time.

A few days later, Dave

confided to Emma, “It felt

the same as it did when

I first held the other two

kids after they were born!”

“For me, too!” Emma

agreed. The early weeks

were difficult, but the

Lord was gracious. Dave

and Emma were amazed

by the way their church

family rallied around them

during this time, providing

an abundance of supplies,

resources and support.

The moms and tots group

which Emma was a part of

even threw them a surprise

“Welcome Party,” in lieu

of a regular baby shower.

There were numerous

challenges, and Emma

found that she had to rely

on the Lord’s grace more

than ever before – and yet

the blessings outweighed

the trials.

Months later, Emma

stumbled upon a wonderful

book called Adopted for Life

by Russell Moore. In the first

chapter of the book, Emma

read, “Not everyone is called

to adopt. No one wants

parents who adopt children

out of the same sense of duty

with which they may give to

the building fund for the new

church gymnasium. But all of

us have a stake in the adoption

issue, because Jesus does.

He is the one who tells us his

Father is also ‘Father to the

fatherless’ (Ps. 68:5). He is the

one who insists on calling ‘the

least of these’ His ‘brothers’

(Matt. 25:40) and who tells us

that the first time we hear His

voice, He will be asking us if

we did the same.”

Emma closed the book and

considered all of the people

who had poured into their own

lives before, during and after

the adoption process. Without

a second thought, she realised,

“Yes. Adoption is something

that everyone can support

and be a part of, whether they

actually adopt or not.”

Author note: This article is comprised of a compilation of experiences and quotes from several real-life adoptive families in South Africa.

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3 THINGS WE LEARNT THROUGH THE ADOPTION OF OUR SON, ZURICH ABRAHAM MARSHALL:

Our motivation for adoption flows out of God’s love for us and our gratitude for His gospel.

Adoption is a powerful illustration of the Gospel. God adopted us into His

family through the ultimate sacrifice of His Son. This is key for us, and we

really tried to root our motivation here throughout the entire adoption

process and still do on a daily basis. Obligation, duty, guilt, or emotion would

never suffice. Out of the overflow of what God has done and continues doing

for us, is our motivation for giving ourselves to a child in need.

God pursues us as orphans and adopts us into His family.

The adoption process showed us a beautiful picture of how God adopted us

into His family. We are so undeserving and unworthy, but yet He still pursues

us and loves us as His very own. We are beyond grateful for this beautiful

picture that we are reminded of daily through His sovereignty and through

the entire process of adopting our son Zurich. We fought hard for two long

years until we were home with our son from Ethiopia and we would do it

ten times over again. It has changed our family for the better and we can’t

imagine our lives without him.

Our God is bigger than we can ever imagine.

The adoption process showed us what a big God we serve. There are so many

orphans and children without adequate care all over the world. Ethiopia alone

has over five million orphans. God is bigger than we ever can imagine and He

knows each child by name. He has called us to care for widows and orphans

(James 1:27). Adoption is such a beautiful way to display the power of the

Gospel in our own lives and what Christ has done for us on the cross. We are

reminded of these truths daily and grateful for the unending grace that is

poured into our lives. We have been so blessed by adoption in our family and

hope to adopt again in the near future.

ADOPTED FOR LIFE by Dr. Russell Moore

Nichole Marshall says: “It is a gospel-centred book on adoption that truly changed our lives.”

THE LONG JOURNEY HOME

Aaron and Nichole began their adoption process in February 2010 and brought their son home to US soil in February 2012, after a gruelling

battle to pass court in Ethiopia. Nichole says, “Zurich was actually abandoned in a ditch by the side of the road, just down the street from an orphanage, when he was about one month old. There is no trace of biological family for him that was found. We are grateful to now be his forever family.” She adds that they were in Zurich, Switzerland, around the time when he was born. “We felt like it was a strong name for one of the wealthiest cities in the world, and such a beautiful picture of how God brought this sweet little boy from being abandoned, into our family and ultimately His family of wealth.”

LEFT: Aaron and Nichole Marshall with their son Zurich

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It was ten thirty in the morning as I unlocked the

front door to our home and ushered my three kids

inside. They had barely set foot in the house when

they pleaded, “Can we go play outside, Mom?” “Sure,”

I answered, and walked through the lounge to unlock

the glass door leading to the backyard. “That’s odd,” I

thought to myself, “This key never used to stick before.

I wonder why it’s so difficult to open today.”

As I struggled to get the key to turn, my gaze fell to the

window on my left. Broken glass. The reality did not

register. I continued to fidget with the key. More broken

glass, on the floor below the window. Finally the reality

sunk in. There had been an attempted break-in.

My mind kicked into full gear as my eyes rapidly

assessed the damage. Thankfully, the burglar bars

were still in tact, so it did not seem likely that anyone

had actually succeeded in entering the house. Still, my

heart pounded. I stepped cautiously through each room,

checking behind every door, determined to make sure

that we didn’t have any unwanted guests in our midst.

Then I went for the phone. My husband was speaking

at a conference an hour away that day, out of cell

phone reach. Unsure as to whom I was supposed to call

first – landlady? Insurance? Police? – I found myself

dialing our pastor’s number to ask for his advice in the

situation. As I held the receiver to my ear, recounting

the events to our pastor, my eldest son interrupted me:

“Mom, there’s a guy in our backyard!” I told my pastor,

who told me to call the

police. Within seconds I had

corralled the kids out of the

lounge into their bedroom

and locked the door behind

us, phone in hand. In a mild

state of panic, I told the

kids to get under the bed,

and I dialed the police, my

eyes fixed on the burglar

crouching against a wall in

our backyard.

While we waited for the

police to arrive, I tried my

best to maintain a calm

outward appearance for the

sake of my kids, though my

heart thumped against the

wall of my chest. Did he

know we were inside? Could

he hear me talking through

the window? Was he

armed? What would he do

when the police came? How

could I shield my kids from

this reality, when there was

no way for me to conceal it?

All these questions raced

By Kate Motaung

Responding to the desire for safety in a crime-ravaged landBy Kate Motaung

FEARLIVING IN

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through my mind as the

seconds loudly ticked by

on my watch, the burglar

unmoving. I prayed out

loud with the kids, in an

attempt to calm my own

nerves as well as theirs,

and to direct our thoughts

to our Almighty God for

comfort. We prayed for

our safety – but mostly,

we prayed for the guy

outside.

Finally the police arrived,

and to cut a very long

story somewhat shorter,

the perpetrator managed

to hide in the shower

of our granny flat for

three hours before finally

jumping over our wall into

the neighbour’s yard and

escaping without being

caught. Needless to say,

I didn’t sleep a wink that

night. The glass remained

broken, and the wind

howled relentlessly from

sunset to sunrise. Of

course, in my mind’s eye,

every single blowing leaf

and cracking twig was

the sound of a ‘bad guy’

trying to gain access to

our abode. I thought I

was going to have a heart

attack. I knew I should

be thinking about other

things, but my elevated

blood pressure and

echoing pulse prevented

my mind from being

calmed. I finally got up

the next morning and saw

my reaction in a fresh

light. I could not live like

this. I could not live the

rest of my life crippled by

fear. I had seen it happen

before to friends of mine,

and I was determined that

it would not happen

to me.

I refused to be imprisoned

in my own home because

of the thoughtless whim

of a teenager to snatch

a wallet or two. But how

was I supposed to rein in

my fear? Should I change

the locks on our doors;

get stronger burglar bars;

add spikes to the tops

of our existing concrete

perimeter walls?

Would any of those

changes get to the root

of the issue and calm my

anxious heart?

DOCTRINE THAT DEFINES AND REFINES

A Christian friend of

mine was mugged in

broad daylight on her

way to work one morning,

with multitudes of

people milling around.

Recounting the aftermath

of the event, she admits,

“I was angry and hurt

and convinced myself it

was alright to feel the

way I did. ‘It’s unfair,’ I

thought, ‘that I should be

expected to accept being

mugged as a ‘normal’

South African experience

and just get on with

life.’ Encouragement

from family and friends

helped me realise I could

not carry the bitterness

around with me.”

Crime and traumatic

events will affect different

people in different

ways. For my friend, the

Lord used her mugging

experience to highlight

the fact that each one

of us, regardless of

background or history,

is fallen before God.

She writes, “The whole

incident, interestingly

enough, made me reflect

on fundamental Christian

truths. We live in a fallen

world where crime and

pain is a reality. The

realisation that struck

me most was a direct

conviction from the Lord

that even though I am a

church-going, tax-paying

citizen, I am as wretched

in my transgressions as

the man who assaulted

me. Before the Lord, we

are both sinners. I have

been saved by grace.”

After our attempted

break-in, I, too, began

thinking about the

character of God, and the

promise of salvation. The

more I thought about it,

the more I realised that

even if something did

happen to me, I would be

much better off – enjoying

eternity with my Creator.

The following passage

from Matthew 10 came to

mind, as I considered the

fact that mortal man can

only do so much harm:

“Do not be afraid of

those who kill the body

but cannot kill the soul.

Rather, be afraid of the

One who can destroy

both soul and body in hell.

Are not two sparrows

sold for a penny? Yet not

one of them will fall to

the ground outside your

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Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are

all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more

than many sparrows” (Matthew 10:28-31).

Another related passage that helped me was

Psalm 56: 3-4:

“When I am afraid,

I will trust in you.

In God, whose word I praise,

in God I trust; I will not be afraid.

What can mortal man do to me?”

I quickly realised that the Word of God was going to be a

very effective tool in putting my mind at ease. I decided

then and there to find a handful of verses to memorise

and meditate on to combat this mounting post-break-

in anxiety. I won’t pretend as though these verses were

magical in any way – I still had moments of tension and

gripping fear. It took several days after the incident

before I was able to confidently hang washing on the

line at the back, in full view of where the perpetrator

had hidden. We all know there is no way to prevent

crimes from being committed against us. Bad things

can happen to anyone at anytime. But as Christians, we

have something that no one else has – a firm belief in the

sovereignty of God.

THE SOVEREIGNTY OF GOD

What happens when bad things do happen to us? Do

we let Satan win and just throw in the towel on our faith

in an Almighty God? What about Romans 8:28? “And

we know that in all things, God works for the good of

those who love Him ….” What? How could a crime be

considered good? No, it doesn’t say that all things are

good … it says that God works all things for the good of

His people.

It’s often through traumatic experiences that the rubber

hits the road and our faith is tested. Do we really

believe that God could use even a mugging, a break-in

or a hijacking for the good of those who love Him? We

may never see the good that comes from a particularly

unpleasant event – but it doesn’t diminish the truth of

God’s character and promises.

In my friend’s case, the Lord caused her to reflect on His

sovereignty as it relates to His vengeance and justice.

She writes, “I was greatly encouraged by many scriptures

detailing God’s sovereignty over my life and his never-

faltering hand over me. Through it all, though, this

passage still speaks to me: ‘Do not avenge yourselves,

but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance

is mine, I will repay, says the Lord’’ (Romans 12:19).

You see, in South Africa

where crime is rampant

and we are faced with

these situations all the

time, it’s easy to believe:

“I did NOT deserve

that!”; and it’s easy to

feel vengeful. I needed

to remember that I don’t

actually deserve anything,

but God is gracious. I do

not deserve to be His

daughter, but He accepted

me freely and justice in

Him is perfect. As John

Piper said, ‘God is a God

of perfect justice. He sees

every wrong done. His

memory is infallible. And

he will repay with perfect

justice.’ But the justice

belongs to Him, not me.”

LIVING IN THE LAND OF “WHAT IF’S”

As difficult as it was, I

refused to let one incident

make me paranoid for

months. Not only for

myself, but for my kids as

well – would it be fair for

me to lock them inside,

just in case something

might happen? If that

were my approach, I

would never be able to

travel in a car, for fear

that it might crash. If

the line of thinking is

followed to its logical

conclusion, nobody would

be able to do anything

or go anywhere for fear

of the “what if’s.” We

all struggle at certain

times and in different

ways. Parents will always

fear for their children’s

safety. Women will often

be fearful when walking

alone at night. Don’t get

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me wrong – I’m not saying

we should be unwise or

careless.

I’m also very aware that,

particularly in South

Africa, horrendous

crimes take place every

day, and the lingering

trauma will likely have no

quick fixes. It may take

years to recover from a

particularly traumatic

event. But it is possible,

with God’s help. Above

all, we have to believe

that nothing – absolutely

nothing – happens

apart from the perfect,

sovereign control of our

Lord and Saviour.

FINE-TUNED THEOLOGY

I heard an account of a

woman whose husband

died in the hospital

emergency room.

Following the tragedy,

she said, “The hospital

is no place to sort out

your theology. It has to

be in place before the

emergency strikes.” The

same could be said for

crime. We should prepare

ourselves in advance, so

that we are ready to cling

to the truth should the

need arise.

How much do we depend

on our burglar bars,

our alarm systems, our

panic buttons, our cans

of pepper spray – and

how much do we depend

on the Lord our God? Is

Psalm 20:7 really true

for us? “Some trust in

chariots and some in

horses, but we trust in the

name of the LORD

our God.”

Honestly speaking, do

we worship safety and

security more than the

One who can provide it?

A few days before our

break-in, I read the

following passage:

“I, even I, am he who

comforts you.

Who are you that you

fear mere mortals,

human beings who

are but grass,

that you forget the

Lord your Maker,

who stretches out the

heavens

and who lays the

foundations of the

earth,

that you live in constant

terror every day

because of the wrath

of the oppressor,

who is bent on

destruction?”

(Isaiah 51:12-13)

As we consider our own

fears and anxieties, let’s

reflect carefully on this

passage and honestly

consider:

In whom or what do I

find my comfort?

In what ways do I fear

mere mortals?

In what ways do I

forget the Lord my

maker?

In what ways do I

lack faith in the power

and sovereignty of my

Creator?

In what ways do I live

in constant terror

every day?

From what do I need

to repent of before

God and ask for

forgiveness?

When I asked my friend

what advice she would

give to someone who has

had an experience with

crime, she replied: “Know

that the Lord is sovereign.

If, for some reason, He

allows you to go through a

painful experience, He will

carry you through it.”

That’s it, folks. It may

sound easier said than

done, but with God, all

things are possible. May

He help each one of us

to strengthen our faith in

Him.

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a crowd

The other night we had an all-nighter; not the self-inflicted kind I remember from yesteryear; not the result of work left ‘til the last minute, nor (sadly) because of a great celebration. Our youngest little one was vomiting for most of the night. Two nights on, and we had a repeat of the whole thing with our three-year old. A few days later, I was down...

Now, I am very aware that for some mothers, the all-nighters from colicky babies or sick children are more the norm than the exception, so I recognise that this experience is mild in comparison. I tell you about it simply because in between clean up ‘shifts’ and efforts not to grumble and delve into self-pity; I reflected on how motherhood, in fact parenthood, is really a pathway to putting others first... always. Every minute of the day, even the minutes between 12am and 4am, it’s my life, my money, my time, my body, my food, my sleep... for yours!

It begins before we’re even aware of it. When a woman falls pregnant, her organs shift a little higher up every week to make space for this growing life. God has so wisely created our bodies to seamlessly jump into ‘selfless sacrifice’; why is it then that after the ‘honeymoon’ period, our hearts seem to take forever to shift into gear?

SERVING NOT BEING SERVED... LIKE NEVER BEFORE!

Three’s a crowd? Truth be told, even two’s a crowd when we’re called to hold another’s interests as more important than our own. When my husband and I got married, we were told that sharing a life together would be a platform to see how utterly selfish our hearts are, more so than we’d probably noticed before. That certainly was the case. In our experience the same can be said when it comes to having babies... only, on steroids!

No matter how easy or colicky the baby, how compliant or rebellious the toddler, your ‘wants’ and ‘needs’ and ‘creature comforts’ as individuals, and obviously as a couple, come last. In our experience of God’s kindness, the love He has placed in our hearts has at times made it feel easy as pie to deny ourselves for one of these precious little people – but

certainly not all the time! As we serve and sacrifice daily, an exhaustion and resentment can start to grow in our hearts... and whilst we probably see much of that reflected in our speech and attitudes toward our children, it undoubtedly causes distance and difficulty towards one another in marriage.

KEEP LOOKING TO JESUS

Getting married and having a family is such a wonderful gift and blessing from the Lord. However, it does not bring the contentment nor the fulfilment that can only be found in a relationship with Him. In fact, marriage and family are both gifts that point to Him. The family unit is another one of God’s genius designs for proclaiming His wonderful salvation available in Jesus.

Marriage is often described as a tool

for us to see our selfish hearts.

What happens when you add a baby

to the mix? By Liza Ender

Three’s

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When we love and respect our husbands and teach and train our children, we are pointing them to Jesus. Even the watching world gets a glimpse of our God; His goodness, wisdom and rescue mission.

If we know and belong to Jesus, our behaviour needs to show it, and for married women this looks like being taught and trained “to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands.” Why? According to Titus ch2:5 “so that no-one will malign the word of God”; and in v10 “so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Saviour attractive.” (Take a look at Ephesians 5 and Titus 1& 2 to read more)

Marriage and family are God’s idea, and so we turn to Him for the enabling power to live life His way; life lived the good way – in fact, the best way. Titus tells us “Our great God and Saviour, Jesus Christ... gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are His very own, eager to do what is good.” (Titus 2:13 and 14)

Jesus gave Himself for you. Sacrifice and service is tough, and I believe motherhood requires at times the deepest levels of selflessness we might ever know. But no matter how much we might serve, we will never have served and sacrificed more than our King Jesus. Fix your eyes on Him. Imitate His example. Draw your strength from Him. Pray for wisdom, pray for more of his unlimited patience and then pray some more! Trust His promises and His endless goodness.

FOCUS CHANGE You will no longer be able to give your spouse all your personal attention. Both you and your spouse must commit to not take this reality personally. You are not neglecting your partner, just taking some time that you would have spent with each other to devote to your new baby. However, it’s important to continue to make time together a top priority. Infants take around-the-clock care, so what happens to your marriage relationship during this time? Ask God to give you a realistic glimpse of what your current priority list looks like and if any adjustments should be made before the baby arrives.

LESS TIME TOGETHER Making time for just the two of you (without your baby) may become your new creative project. It was so easy before to be together. There were no distractions, but soon things will be different. It will take more effort from you and your spouse to make sure that you are continuing to nurture your relationship. Consider regular date nights or spending time together when your child is asleep. Remember, you can’t have a growing relationship with someone if you neglect to spend time nurturing that relationship.

ONENESS How in tune you feel with your spouse has the potential to decrease after having a child. But this doesn’t need to be the case! Remember that technically you are one. Genesis 2:24 says, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.” Both you and your spouse MUST make the effort to continue nurturing your marriage relationship. Your oneness will affect the life of your child. It really will. Think about your own parents. Did they enjoy one another? What did that look like to you? What does enjoying each other look like in your own relationship? How do you know when your spouse is enjoying you?

HOBBIES Now that you have a child, you may not find time to train for a mini-marathon, or your husband may not find time to rebuild the engine on his ‘66 Mustang convertible. Both of you may discover that your hobbies and interests change to include your child. Consider using free time as family time or take small family outings, such as trips to the zoo, picnics in the park, or shopping trips to the store. Yes, even your shopping trips will change. Although you may increase in shared interests, continue to hold on to some essential individual interests too. Try to create a healthy balance between both.

FREEDOMS Both you and your spouse will have less time to do your own thing. You may even reminisce about the days before you had kids, days when you could visit your friends without packing up a minivan. Freedom changes do not have to mean life sentences for either of you. New beginnings will fall in place. This can be a difficult transition for some men (and some women too). Pray that you and your spouse will be able to release individual freedoms in order to gain new family devotion together.

Your spouse plays an important role in how you will parent. We know that within

marriage we “become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24, NIV) with our spouses, and we also

know that “a house divided against itself will fall” (Luke 11:17, NIV). So if we are one we

must act as one and parent as one. The only other option is to fail based on division.

Without God, it isn’t possible to create the oneness He intends. But with Him and with

pursuit, we “can do all things” (Philippians 4:13).

This content appeared on www.growthtrac.com and is an excerpt used with permission from Rebecca Dawson’s book Help! I’m a Mom To Be (Blue Room Publications and Production, LLC).

HELP!My marriage is having a baby!How will a child affect your marriage? There are lots of answers to this question, but let’s look at five:

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Always use fresh ingredients If you have some dodgy looking veg, use it in stews, where it is okay for them to be limp and soggy. Salads need to be crisp and fresh.

Wash your ingredients wellSpinach and fresh lettuce are nefariously known to have sand and grit hidden in their leaves. Wash vegetables really well to make sure that they’re dirt-free. You WILL notice the difference.

Don’t over complicate with too many flavours Choose a theme, i.e. Chinese style, Thai flavours, or Greek etc. and stick to those type of flavours. A

simple summer SaladsCRISP, FRESH, HEALTHY. NOTHING QUITE SAYS “SUMMER” LIKE A GREAT SALAD...By Lara Demnitz

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“Greek influenced Chinese salad with a Malaysian style barbecue blue cheese dressing” is a bit like experiencing culture shock on a food scale.

Keep a balance of texturesA good salad will have crisp veg, something with a crispy texture or an intense crunch, and then softer, easily chewable items. You don’t want a salad that has too many crunchy textures, as it will feel like you are chomping on gravel.

If in doubt keep most of the ingredients blandGood salads work because they don’t all have intense-flavoured ingredients. Lettuce, cucumber and tomatoes are generally soft

I am a huge fan of salads. I judge a restaurant or food establishment based on their presentation and freshness of their salads. If a restaurant puts that much care and attention into the most simple of their dishes, then you know that their more complicated dishes will surely be a win. That or clearly they have a genius in the cold kitchen. You generally can’t go too wrong with a salad if you keep the balance of flavours right and follow these simple rules

flavours, and are enhanced by one or two intense flavours, such as a spicy meat or vegetable, and a flavourful dressing.

Don’t experiment on guests Rather save that for the comfort of your own home. If you are entertaining, use a recipe that you have used before that has been successful.

Serve the dressing lastMost dressings contain an acid and an oil. The acid will firm up the salad ingredients, and start to break them down, and the oil will make them floppy. Dress your salad just before serving.

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Roasted beetroot, butternut, feta and bacon salad with toasted pumpkin seeds

Serves 8

1kg beetroot (about 10 medium ones)

1kg butternut, peeled and chopped

250g bacon, diced

200g feta, drained

100g pumpkin seeds

50ml balsamic vinegar

2T brown sugar

Olive oil

Salt

Pepper

400g salad leaves

1 cucumber

150g baby tomatoes (optional)

Preheat oven to 150°C.

*TIP: Wash your hands thoroughly and spread a small amount of oil on your hands, rubbing it in to your fingernails. This prevents the beetroot juices from staining your hands.*

Peel the beetroot and wash them well. Chop into quarters or sixths for the larger beets. Place in an oven proof dish or on a tray. Drizzle with olive oil and season. Roast for an hour.

Mix the balsamic and sugar together and pour over the beetroot, place back in the oven for a further half an hour.

Peel and chop the butternut and place in a separate oven proof dish or on a tray. Drizzle with olive oil and season. Place in the oven when the beetroot has already roasted for 50 minutes.

When the veg are almost finished, with 15 minutes roasting time remaining, crumble the feta over the butternut, and sprinkle the bacon on top, and continue roasting.

Wash the salad leaves and set aside.

Slice the cucumber and add to the leaves.

Splash the salad leaves with some balsamic vinegar and olive oil, and toss.

Season and then divide between eight salad bowls or plates.

In a hot pan, toast the pumpkin seeds until they brown slightly and start to pop.

Divide the beetroot, butternut, bacon and feta between the eight bowls and serve warm with more balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Sprinkle the pumpkin seeds on top.

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Strawberry, feta and black pepper salad

Serves 4

120g salad leaves

Half a cucumber

100g baby tomatoes

2 rounds of feta, cubed

8 strawberries, quartered

5 radishes

Olive oil

Balsamic glaze

Black pepper

Preheat oven to 180°C.

Wash the salad leaves and arrange on a plate or in a bowl.

Halve the cucumber, and arrange on top of the salad leaves.

Scatter the washed baby tomatoes over the salad.

Cube the feta, and quarter the strawberries, and arrange on the salad.

Finely slice the radishes and layer on top.

Drizzle with olive oil and balsamic glaze. Grind with a generous amount of black pepper and serve immediately.

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Warm sticky chicken salad with almondsand apricots and a honey and mustard dressing

Serves 4

For the chicken:

1t olive oil

250-300g (2) chicken breasts, de-skinned and deboned

2T apricot jam

2T teriyaki or soy sauce

1T sesame oil

40g (12) Turkish apricots

For the salad:

100g salad leaves

1/4 cucumber, sliced

100g baby tomatoes, washed and halved

1/4 red onion, sliced

40g toasted almond flakes

Preheat oven to 180°C.

Wash and cut the salad ingredients accordingly.

Place on two separate plates and refrigerate.

Make the dressing:

Mix the olive oil and lemon juice together.

Whisk in the honey and mustard. Continue whisking until it forms a smooth, slightly thick dressing.

Taste and adjust according to your palate - I like my dressings to be acidic and not too sweet.

Set aside.

Make the chicken:

Chop the chicken into bite-sized pieces and set aside.

Heat a saucepan on the stove and add the olive oil. When the pan is hot add the chicken.

Stir-fry until beginning to brown, about three minutes, and then add the sliced apricots.

Cook for a further two minutes and then add the apricot jam, the teriyaki or soy sauce, and the sesame oil. Cook until the sauce begins to bubble, about one more minute.

Check that the chicken is cooked all the way through, and has no pink shades in the centre.

Spoon the cooked chicken and apricots over the prepared salad ingredients and sprinkle with the toasted almonds.

Drizzle over the dressing and serve.

For the dressing:

25ml olive oil

20ml lemon juice

1t honey

2t wholegrain or plain Dijon mustard

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STEP 1Put a handful of marshmallows in a microwave-safe bowl and splash with water.

If you’re using flavouring, now’s the time to add a few drops.

Tip: Our favourite flavour is caramel essence. We added about 1 1/2 teaspoons to 7 marshmallows. Be careful not too add too much at this stage, as some of the flavours can be quite strong – you can always put in more when you add the icing sugar in Step 4.

YOU WILL NEED

Marshmallows

Icing sugar

Food colouring and flavouring (optional)

Rolling pin

Heart-shaped cookie cutter

Toothpick

Fondant heartsan edible project for valentines daySurprise your sweetheart with these handmade

conversation hearts this Valentine’s Day. Not only do they

taste and look sweet, but you don’t need to be queen of

the kitchen to whip them up – in fact, you don’t need any

baking or cooking skills at all! By Carin Bevan

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STEP 2Microwave on high for a few seconds at a time – the marshmallows should just begin to melt and become puffy.

STEP 6bThe plan is to make the dough soft, not sticky, and easy to roll out. When you’re done, the dough ball should look like pizza dough or soft play dough.

STEP 6aDip your hands in icing sugar and start kneading. Do this by rolling your fist and knuckles over the dough or by squeezing it through your fingers.

STEP 10Leave the hearts out for a few hours, or overnight if possible, to make them slightly harder and crunchy.

Fondant hearts are very sweet, so serve them with dark chocolate mousse and coffee or pop them on a chocolate cupcake. Or put them in a pretty gift box, bag or tin and give them to your sweetheart!

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STEP 3Stir the marshmallows with a wooden spoon or rubber spatula until smooth.

Tip: You can add the food colouring now – just remember that the colour will fade when you add the

icing sugar. Or you can add it when you knead the dough (see Step 6.) Adding it now is ideal for liquid colour, while adding it in Step 6 works well for colouring gel. You can always put in more when you add the icing sugar in.

STEP 4Stir in some icing sugar, one spoonful at a time. The goal is to turn the mixture into a soft dough that you can roll into a ball, so add enough sugar to make the mixture less sticky, but not so much that it becomes hard and stiff.

Tip: As you add the icing sugar, taste the mix to make sure that the flavouring is still strong enough. Add more if needed.

STEP 7Roll out the dough with a rolling pin. If the dough sticks to the pin, sprinkle it with icing sugar. We rolled out our dough to about half a centimetre thick, but it’s up to you to decide how thick you want your fondant hearts to be.

STEP 8Cut out the heart shapes.

STEP 9With a toothpick, write short messages on your hearts. It may take some practice to get the letters small and neat, but making mistakes is no problem – if you’re not happy with the result, just scrunch up the dough, roll it out, cut a new shape and try again.

STEP 5When you can easily shape the dough into a ball without it sticking to your hands, place it on a table or baking sheet that has been sprinkled with icing sugar. (This is to make sure

that the dough doesn’t stick to the surface.)

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A parent

WITH A purpose...

MEET Jaci Mun-Gavin:

This devoted wife and hands-on mom to six children

is a robotics engineer by qualification, but finds being

married to the leader of a church, raising her kids

and writing books now keeps her busier and more

challenged than a career in engineering ever did.

Together with her husband Richard, the family – Jada

Grace (10), Kiara (7), Jed (5), Rourke (4), Kade (2) and

Tyden (8 months) make their home on the Kwa-Zulu

Natal South Coast. Jaci chats to Radiant about her

latest book release...

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Can you tell us, in a nutshell, what your book Purposeful Parenting is about?

Purposeful Parenting is a book to give parents a vision and direction for the why and how of parenting God’s way. It gives parents a reason to start or continue down this daunting road, and lots of helpful biblical rules and guidelines to producing children that will fulfill their God-ordained place and role in the world.

What inspired you to write on this subject and how did the book come to be?

God tells us that, of all His creation, people are the ‘work’ that is created in His image. And I believe, of all the things people do, parenting children is the one picture that most accurately represents how God relates to us, and how we can relate to Him. This book is about representing God to the world in a way that is a true reflection of His kindness, love, and gentleness, so that our children, and people who witness our parenting, might be drawn to want to know their Heavenly Father because they like what they see in us as parents. How has God challenged you personally, as you wrote on this topic?

God is so kind! The opening chapters of the book that explore the purpose of parenting and why we would ‘subject’ ourselves to the incredible strain and hard work was written while I was in the throes of feeling horribly nauseas with my 6th pregnancy - and looking after five little ones! My question to God, “Remind me why I am doing this?!” was very real and personal, and He answered with such astounding clarity and really inspired me with a strong sense of the usefulness and incredible value of what I was doing..

If you had just one piece of advice to give new parents, what would it be?

Love covers a multitude of sins… and errors! Hold them while you can and number your days correctly - they will fly by!

What do you enjoy doing to relax on your own/with your family?

I absolutely adore being with my kids. I love reading to them. I love sitting on the floor and playing with them. I love going for walks with them. I find that if I put aside everything ELSE I have to do and just concentrate on being with my children, then they’re not hard work at all. It’s trying to get the rest of life done with six kids trailing along that is hard work.

Are you working on any new material at the moment?

Yes! I feel like my brain and my heart are going to burst from all the ideas God is pouring into me. It’s trying to get them down on paper one at a time that is going to take a while! But I’ll just have to pick one and hopefully I’ll have something more for you to read (or watch - one of the ideas is a play!) soon.

A parent

WITH A purpose...

MEET Jaci Mun-Gavin:

South African readers can purchase Purposeful Parenting from www.publisher.co.za for R114.00 (http://www.publisher.co.za/cart/details/209/41/parenting/purposeful-parenting.html) or internationally (and for Kindle) it is available on Amazon. (http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=jaci+mun-gavin)

Giveaway!!Radiant is giving away a copy of Purposeful Parenting by Jaci Mun-Gavin. To enter, simply send your name and postal address to nicole@radiantmag.co.za with the book’s title in the subject line. Competition closes 28 February 2013.

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A DAY IN THE LIFE...Loki Swanepoel chats to Radiantabout being a missionary in rural Kenya...

Q Can you share a bit about when and how your family came to be living where you are?

One of the things that attracted us to each other when my husband Grant and I met at Bible school was the fact that we were both very interested in missions. After we got married, God used various older Christians to encourage us in our desire to pursue cross-cultural missions. Someone specifically recommended to us that we should consider Kenya as a mission field. My husband had grown up in Kenya as a missionary kid, since his parents have been doing translation and literacy work here for many years.

We came to Northern Kenya as Bible teachers/missionaries in 2004 and spent the first six years here ministering in Korr, a small town in the heart of the Rendille people, and reaching out to several of the nomadic pastoralist groups in the area. In the middle of 2011 God surprised us with a new assignment and we moved to a different people group, the Samburu. Before we were living in the desert; now we live in a green valley full of magnificent acacia trees, but our passion is still to advance the gospel in Africa through applied Bible teaching.

Q What are some of the simple things we take for granted that you and the people around you do not

have access to?

For me as a missionary wife there is no supermarket, no post office, no bank, no tarmac road for many hours’ drive, no hospital (just a very basic little clinic in the neighbouring town) and for the last year our closest colleagues and Western friends were at least two hours’ drive away from us. Where we live now, internet is a huge struggle, so emails get typed with a finger on my phone. But our lives are nothing of a struggle compared to that of the local people. They live in tiny, dim-lit huts. They have to carry all their water to their homes and look for firewood to cook their often meagre meals. There are many people groups around where polygamy and giving very young girls away in marriage is the order of the day. Very few children are in schools and the vast majority of the adult population cannot read or write. Life expectancy is low and all of the pastoralist groups up here feel marginalised and ignored by the majority of their countrymen.

Q What does your life look like on a day-to-day basis?

Our main aim at the moment is to equip the leaders of the young church in Kurungu, so that they can better reach, lead and teach their own people. Grant meets weekly with the elders and I

with the ladies (mamas, as they are called here) so we can study the scriptures together. We are trying to build relationships with the local people in any way possible. That means frequent medical trips to a nearby town where there is a clinic, involvement in one of the local schools as a board member, welding broken motorbikes for some of the local men who are trying to earn a living transporting goods, or employing people in some of the various ongoing projects on our compound and visiting folks at their homes whenever the opportunity arises.

I am first a wife and a mom, so most of my time goes into normal housewife stuff. On weekdays, I cook our meals (no corner café with convenience foods or a take-out restaurant in our one horse town), home school my two six-year-old girls while keeping an eye and or ear open for my two two-year old boys, and attend tea-time (national institution in Kenya at ten every morning) where I have an opportunity to talk to our workers and listen to Grant sharing from the scriptures. I have to communicate almost exclusively in Swahili with people around me, which means talking feels like work sometimes, even though I am an extrovert. Since I am a

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normal sinner and there are often challenging situations, I spend a good bit of time repenting too:)

Q What has surprised you most about

missionary life?

On the one hand, it has been much harder at times than I had anticipated and that in a very unglamorous way. Sitting under a thorn bush somewhere on the plains waiting and praying for safety while your husband fixes the car doesn’t sound glamorous and it isn’t:) Getting all kinds of horrible tummy bugs for more than a year when we first arrived had no particular adventure attached to it. Just like any major change, for example, getting married or becoming a parent, becoming a missionary is another chance to discover how selfish one is. I read in a biography of a lady traveling by boat to the Far East long ago how an older missionary got all the young newcomers together and told them “Now then, girls, when you arrive on the mission field all the scum in your soul is going to rise to the top”. A bit of a come-down for someone who has been told by many that she is so

brave and spiritual and they would never be able to do the same. But wonderful because it makes the cross seem so much more precious! On the other hand, missionary life is an amazing “career”, with so many opportunities. We have had a chance to learn many new skills since we came to Kenya. We have had to learn everything from installing solar lighting and how-to-buy-all-your-food-for-three-months-in-one-go to drawing up detailed financial plans for donors and attending committee meetings where some points have been on the agenda for the last twelve years. We’ve learned new languages and cultures, eaten new foods and seen some breath-taking scenery. We’ve also made friends with people whom we would never have met had we stayed at home.

Q What is your vision and prayer for the

work that your family is involved in, currently and in future, and how can we pray for you?

As we live here longer, we are more and more aware of the fact that there are no quick and easy roads to a mature, indigenous church. That is

the desire of our hearts - to see mature Christian leaders leading the church in a godly way. In people groups with such a high illiteracy rate, especially amongst adults, this is fraught with difficulty but God wants some of these people in His kingdom so we trust He will make a way. Our prayer is that us living here will make the gospel attractive to people. My whole ministry philosophy as a young mom is summed up in Titus 2:3-5. I pray that my being kind and loving, busy at home, showing hospitality and respecting my husband’s leadership will commend the gospel to people.

We covet your prayers for the things mentioned above; and that we would be faithful and that God will show us the good works that He has prepared for us to walk in every day. Please also pray for our communication project that we started recently in order to get reliable internet here in the bush. I love the charge of Paul to Timothy and if you pray just this verse regularly for us it would make such a difference. “Keep your head in all situations, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, fulfil all the duties of your ministry”.

FROM FAR LEFT: Grant Loki and family, Grant preaching, Kurungu church, Grant teaching devotions

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Singing for the

redeemedCourtney Jonas has achieved

a lot in her 23 short years. In

addition to performing roles in

High School Musical and Evita

straight after graduation, last

year saw the exciting release

of her first solo album

We Are The Redeemed.

Following a career as a

gospel artist has always

been her dream, so

Radiant chatted a

little more to this

up-and-coming star

about her musical

journey thus far...

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I read that you decided you wanted to be a gospel artist at the age of nine. When did you become a Christian?

I was very fortunate to grow up in a

Christian home – my mom was devoted

to the Lord and I even went to a Christian

school, so I was surrounded by a God-

filled environment. Obviously though,

there comes a time when you need to

make a decision for yourself, which for

me happened at an early age by God’s

grace. Around that time I started picking

up Christian CDs and I would turn them

over to see the label of the recording

studio, and the dream of one day being

signed as a singer and songwriter began

to grow.

You’ve achieved success both in the secular entertainment industry as well as in the Christian music industry. Was there a point where you needed to decide it was one or the other?

There definitely came a point where

I had to make a decision. Just after I

graduated from the Waterfront Theatre

College I got offered my roles in High

School Musical and subsequently Evita,

which were just the most amazing

experiences. They fell into place really

quickly and easily and I believe God gave

me those opportunities. But being a

solid Christian in the secular music and

theatre industry doesn’t come without its

struggles, and there came a point where

I knew I needed to pursue the gospel else

I would get caught up in musical theatre.

My childhood dream of being signed as

a gospel singer and songwriter came

true in 2011 when my first major deal

came through, starting with the iShine

Southern Starz TV show (an extension

of America’s enormous tween ministry,

flighted on DSTV’s ONE Gospel channel).

My career direction is now firmly rooted

in the Christian music industry and I

haven’t looked back.

redeemedThere’s no doubt about the struggles a Christian faces in the secular entertainment world. Are there any particular challenges that come with being an artist in the Christian music industry?

As a Christian artist you are expected to

be perfect in every way, which obviously

isn’t possible as we’re human! It can be

challenging but at the same time it’s

just a reminder to strive to be a godly

example to your fans. This is especially

true when it comes to being a role

model for the youth – you don’t want to

shame God in any way and ultimately be

responsible for leading them astray in

their impressions of what a Christian life

should look like.

You released your album in 2012 so that was a huge step. What are your plans for 2013?

Yes, releasing my first solo album, “We

Are The Redeemed” towards the end of

last year was a major highlight for me

and from what I hear the album sales are

doing well and I hope they continue to in

the year ahead. I am actually expecting

a baby in the next couple of days (!) so

the year ahead will be very much about

motherhood, and writing new songs as

I’m inspired by this new journey. I feel

that becoming a mom can only enhance

my work and I’m looking forward to

carrying on, keeping my eyes fixed on God.

Win!!Christian Art Media is giving 2 CD hampers away to lucky Radiant readers. Each hamper will contain We Are The Redeemed, the Oslo Gospel Choir album Stay Amazed and iShine Southern Starz (all featuring Courtney). Email nicole@radiantmag.co.za with “CD hamper” in the subject line.

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So here’s the thing. About a year ago I had coffee with a friend. She’s wisdom with skin on. She shared an idea that God had been evolving through her experiences. It might not be brand new to you, but it was to me. She said: “Your greatest strengths can so quickly – too easily – become your greatest weaknesses.”

The paradox deceives us. We think that our weaknesses are opposite to our strengths. So we think that our weaknesses are our greatest weakness. (D’oh.) But they’re not. We know our weaknesses. (Mostly.) It’s obvious when we suck at something. And so when it comes to our weaknesses we operate in humility. We graciously avoid – apologise – defer. It can be quite beautiful to be bad at something. It gives us a chance to celebrate someone else. Point the glory away from ourselves without being false or self-deprecating.

It’s our strengths that make us dangerous. Dangerous to the enemy if we play them right. Dangerous to ourselves and others and the Kingdom if we don’t. Our real weaknesses – our blind spots that have us pushing on oblivious and self-assured – are our overdeveloped strengths. Which means, the incredible, city-set-on-a-hill things about you that draw people to Jesus can be just the things that push people away.

I blogged here http://growyounginside.com/2012/08/28/when-you-wrestle-with-ambition-and-gods-agenda/ about one of my Double-Edged Personality-Strength disorders. Maybe you can relate. For example, maybe you’re that confident-decisive-energetic woman. A go-getter with clear ideas. You sweep people up and away. With you they’ll go places. Wow, you are so attractive. Except when you’re forceful. Domineering. Opinionated. Then you’re so not. Maybe you’re that caring-kind-sensitive girl. Always concerned. You feel things hard and you would climb skyscrapers to help people. You’re so beautiful. Except when you’re over-sensitive. And when you ask too many questions because you just don’t know when to turn down the intensity levels and give people some space. Then, girl, you are such high maintenance. You get the idea, right?

So what’s the answer? How do we enjoy our strengths – live them out unapologetically and for God’s glory – without allowing them to become liabilities?

You need to know what waits on the other side. If you are good at being dynamic and decisive, know that you might also be good at being impetuous and impatient. If you are good at self-sacrifice, know that you are probably also good at playing the poor-me martyr.

You need to surrender your agenda and your ego. A dam

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By Dalene Reyburn

The brightnessthat leaves the deepest shadow

is a massive body of water. Everyone can see that. (FYI: In the dam analogy, you’re the dam.) The dam doesn’t need to prove how much water it has by every day opening the sluice gates and destroying all forms of life in the valley below (with its life-giving water). There might come a time when a massive show of strength is necessary. Then for sure the dam should create a magnificent deluge without apology. But day to day, the dam should look at the crops in the valley. Listen to the people. Decide just how wide to open the sluice gates. Some days there’s just a trickle of water down the wall. Some days there’s a steady stream. And on very thirsty days, the people know where to go. Also, the dam has no reason to boast about its water. Because, ‘What do you have that God hasn’t given you?’ (1 Corinthians 4:7)

I find this stuff so overwhelming, because I’m terrified I don’t see it in myself. I pray for you, radiant woman, and I pray for me, that we would look with Holy Spirit eyes. Listen with Holy Spirit ears. Decide in faith. Then go with the strength we have, because the God of peace and power is sending us (Judges 6:14, 22-24).