9,132 days or 25 years and 1 day- that’s where I am in my book today. While I am grateful and happy that I am not going through the "quarter-life crisis” just yet (or maybe I am over it already? or maybe it is still on its way?), I know it will be very cocky of me to release a listicle on how to overcome or avoid quarter life crisis when in fact I am probably yet to approach it. I don’t have all the answers to all the mid-20s questions. But maybe because I’m also on this age-stage, I can help you stir up a good introspection by asking the right Questions.

To guide you on how to go through it, I’ll write my own thoughts or answers as well. But let me re-emphasize, I am not claiming authority for the right answers! Let my answers be your internal conversation starter, but the whole point is that you should come up with your OWN answers. So here goes our 10-point…

Quarter Life Quiz

When I re-read this after writing and before posting, I realized that there are so many other concerns about reaching 25, but let’s try to keep each other’s attention span and start with only

10, ok? haha. Lezdudiz!

DISCLAIMER

Have you found your “Ikigai"?I spend a lot of time being with young (and old) professionals and one of the most common struggles is this- "I don’t know what my passion and purpose is. I am not deeply happy with my current job because I feel like something is lacking, or overwhelming…"

I think that much of the quarter life crisis is about the question- What should I really be doing with my life?  I guess this shows that reaching 25 is really a defining moment.

I went through my own quest for answers and then I  came across the concept of “Ikigai” in one of the LinkedIn articles that I read. It is a Japanese concept that is basically about finding out the intersection between that which you love, that which the world needs, that which you can be paid for and that which you are good at. Go ahead and read the article for yourself http://bit.ly/FindYourIkigai

As a counter-punch, here’s another perspective from Oliver Segovia,

"To Find Happiness, Forget About Passion" http://oliversegovia.com/2012/01/13/to-find-happiness-forget-about-passion/

Happiness comes from the intersection of what you love, what you’re good at, and what the world needs. We’ve been told time and again to keep finding the first. Our schools helped developed the second. It’s time we put more thought on the third. ”

Are you living a balanced life?I am currently working as a Marketing consultant to 3 private companies, I am co-leading the Singles Missions of Feast Valle Verde (composed of almost a hundred people), I am the eldest among 3, I am this, I am that. At age 25 when we are at the peak of our energies and career, life can get really busy and fragmented, but I accept that as a fact of life already. The struggle is in keeping the balance. I found this Wheel of Life exercise very helpful and I hope you’ll take the time to go through it too and check your balance.

This will help us take a “helicopter view” of our life, so that we can bring things back into balance. The Wheel of Life gives us a vivid visual representation of the way our life is currently, compared with the way we’d ideally like it to be. It is called “Wheel of Life” because each area of life is mapped on a circle, like the spoke of a wheel.

Here’s the link to the full exercise:

http://bit.ly/WheelOfLife25

Are you investing on your continuous education and “connections"?

We are living in a generation of information explosion, so much so that when people or companies s imply need information,  they don’t always have to pay  someone to get it for them, they just have to do a few clicks on their device and voila, job done! I think that this creates a pressure for us to stay relevant, to keep honing our skills and expertise in what we do, in order to know more, be more and contribute more.

On the other side of the coin, it’s not just enough that we are competent and excellent at what we do- at the end of the day, what they say is true- Life is all about relationships. I had my first job not through  searching online but through the endorsement of a classmate. I got my second job, again not by passing my resume to as many companies, but through another endorsement / referral by someone that I invested in a good working relationship with. Same goes with the businesses that I work with now, it is all about connections (in a good way)!

Some Practical Advice:

Check out the courses at Day8 Academyhttp://day8.org/

Join the WhiteSpaceClub, a monthly gathering of professionals from different fields and age group, all coming together just to build on ideas, connect with each other and share learningshttp://josiahgo.com/white-space-club-by-josiah-go/

**Both Day8 and WhiteSpaceClub are lead by one of my mentors (I wonder if he’s aware of it haha), the marketing guru, Josiah Go.

✓

Are you tracking your expenses?Yeah I know you know about the 10-20-70 rule already. Give 10% back to God, save 20% and live on the 70%. I’m also sure that there are more credible people who can talk about insurances, mutual funds, bonds etc. But I notice that there is little emphasis on building the habit of tracking your expenses. Most of the people our age would have a very active social life- meeting friends here and there, attending bridal showers, weddings and even Christenings and then we all probably share in the household expenses too, and this is also the stage where we have to invest in clothing, grooming etc. I don’t think any of these is bad for as long as there is proper allocation and management. This holds true for me - what we do not measure (or record), we cannot manage.

My practical advise, use a Budget or Expense tracker app.This is what I personally use: Expense IQ App ( Google it! J )

Are you working on BEING(not just searching for) "the right (wo)man"?

For me, 25 is still a good time to be single and love your self and your family and serve the Lord, but I also believe that this is a good time (1) to start working on being the right woman or man- enroll in a culinary course, serve in a Kids ministry, surround yourself with old couples who have stood the test of time and listen to their hard-earned, golden lessons etc and (2) to expand our territories and thereby increase the chances of meeting and winning... the JACKPOT! hahaha

Of course I also feel the pangs of being single at times, but maybe not as much as most of us because I try to saturate myself with so much love from family and friends and to “lose myself” in the service of others :)

Try and check these out https://www.facebook.com/CoachAileen and http://onetrueloveclub.com/

What is your physical outlet?At age 25, naturally, our energy levels are very high and we are at the height of our health, and so we tend to think that we can still “afford” to “abuse" our bodies with less sleep and more and more food and just keep going. But I don’t think that’s fair and right.

Others go for badminton, or boxing, or running, or jogging or laughing (there’s such a thing as laughter yoga, right? haha), but whatever it is, I think the point is that we should have a physical outlet through which we can release our energies or stress or pressure. As for me, I walk. Seriously- I walk in the morning, around the village, around 7 to 9am :) I know it’s a little late and slow, but it helps me achieve the goal, which is to clear my mind and sweat it out!

Try to take this quiz on finding the Right Exercise to Match Your Personality http://bit.ly/ExerciseQuiz

What places have you seen?We can learn from books, talks, conversations and even online, but as for me, nothing beats learning through EXPERIENCING. I am blessed to have started my professional career as a travel agent and so even during those times when my salary was too small all I can afford to travel was the distance between my house and office, I was at least  compensated with a lot of local and international trips.

At age 25 when we are (1) at the peak of our health- when we can still walk along rocky roads and climb steep heights and mountains and dive deep down under and (2) earning fairly higher salaries than the younger ones and at the same time not have as much financial responsibilities as the older ones, I believe that it is the best time to see the world and realize that the cliché “World Peace” that everyone is dreaming of ever since the world began, actually starts with each one of us, going out of our shell and reaching out to others as fellow human beings regardless of race and color. Aside from achieving World Peace (haha), travelling also opens our eyes to the bottomless wonders of His creation, and makes us tell ourselves- “If You are the Creator of this magnificent mountain and clear skies, and you are my Creator too, I must be very, very, very beautiful!” ;)

As for me, my goal is to join one of the trips of Travel Factor (http://travelfactor.org)or Byaheng Victory (http://www.victoryliner.com/byaheng-victory) soon :)

How is your relationship with your own family?Regardless of how many friends we have and how deeply connected we are with them, nothing beats loving the people that God Himself chose for us to live with- our family.

Recently, I was reminded by a friend of what I said in one of my previous talks (yes, I forget my own lessons haha)- that on my eulogy, I would put the most attention and emotion (and yes, I presume I would still be alive on my eulogy, hahaha) listening to what my sisters and parents and relatives would say about how I lived my life, more than my friends and foes, because most of my friends have seen me at my best, while my family have seen me through it all. They say perfection breeds admiration, imperfection breeds true Love. Some friends really only admire us, but it is our family’s love that is really true (at least that’s what I believe)

So at 25, while we have much energy, time and treasure, let’s splurge on the people who matter the most! :)

Have you defined your valuesand your vision for your life?

I think that people go through crisis when they reach quarter life (25+) because it is a crucial stage, of defining and establishing who and what they really want to be for the rest of their lives. I think this is the time when the pressure to choose our solid career path, our spouse (or vocation), our passion etc is at its height. And I think (again, haha) that these can only be addressed if we care enough to pause and really define our vision for our life and identify the values that we will decide to hold on to come hell or high waters in our journey towards that vision.

Proverbs 29:18 says that Where there is no vision, the people perish. And I agree! J If we want to stay alive, and come fully alive from this day (when we reach 25) forward, we have to be fired up by our vision.

It’ll be too long to share mine and again, the point of this is not to tell the world that I have all the answers, so I just wanna invite you to take that pause also and, maybe with the help of the Ikigai exercise as well, define your own. And then, this should help us define our values:

http://bit.ly/DefineYourValues

Have you surrendered?I am sorry but I am not sorry to end this quiz at a “preachy” note but I think this is really important- I think we are like characters in an action movie who do not know the ending of our stories yet, we'd jump off the cliff, we’d shoot our opponents, we’d roll on the floor, we’d do all those exhibitions and absurd, difficult stuff. Absurd and difficult as they may be, we just keep on following the Director because we know that He knows best, that it is His story anyways.

After defining our purpose, passion, values, goals, finding our one true love and setting our vision and all that jazz, at the end of the day, we keep the thrill of the ride and let go of the frustrations only when we Surrender to the Higher Power who has it all in His hands.

Even before we were 25, now that we are 25, and as we stay alive beyond 25, it is in this sweet Surrender that we find true serenity :)

I’d be happy to connect with you and exchange learnings!Let’s keep in touch!

How did you do? J

https://www.facebook.com/gretchen.veranhttps://twitter.com/thegreatchen

http://www.slideshare.net/gretchenveranhttp://ph.linkedin.com/in/gretchenveran