Editorial

We are here

When everythingfalls apart

Home(less)?

Against theinterconnected

loneliness

Keeping oneselfout the way(Incognito)

CLANDESTINE ANARCHIST NEWSPAPER

from everywhere and nowhereNR. 1

MAI 2018FOR FREE

To appear here and there with the strong desire forintimacy, trust and complicity. Always in search of alife, that feels genuine. A life that does not have to

censor in different shades. A life that throughauthenticity is ready to establish its own path to

coherence joyfully. That wants to be more than anroaming shadow in the midst of society...

The newspaper project in hand Fantasma is anexpression of this search. It arised from thecircumstance of involuntary but self­chosenclandestinity and is for that regard not bound by place.We, the authors, foster the desire as made­invisibles totalk about this be­invisible. About lived experiences andconsiderations in this situation. From us, as from othercomrades – and that would be extremly wonderful – thatfind themselves on such a journey right now or haveonce. And because the invisible can not exist without itscounterpart, we encourage all the visibles, that havebeen indirectly affected by a situation like this, to sendin your self­written contributions. To put the reflectionsand initiatives, away from concrete, technical questions,up for a public debate and thus open up a space fordiscussions and exchange with all interested.

The desire to bring back to life the in all directionsextending demystification of clandestinity, from theillusion of the wild and spectacular rebel­life (a fictionof Hollywood with its usual cast, consisting ofprotagonists and spectators) to that illusion of theanxious­paranoid vagabond­lifes. Definitely theresmoments full of wild enthusiasm and the urge foraction. As well as full of doubts and desperation. Buteither of these sides only build the black/white framewhich holds together the many different shades of greythat we are made of. To mistake this frame as the wholeand let it be a fixed picture would only lead to areduction of this complex life with all its tangles to thereplicated spectacle with already prefabricated fixedpictures and roles.

The desire to highlight, through this instrument ofcommunications, all of the hidden capabilities of theindividual, their autonomy, their endless room tomaneuver and to define it as a starting point for arevolutionary transformation of society. It does notmatter in which specific situation one finds itself rightnow.

The state persecutor the finger showing, we hope to beable to contribute with this paper to the anarchist projectand to grow with it. But to make this humble projectknown and spread it all over the place, we are

dependent on the solidarity of the visibles.Unfortunately our situation does not allow to find you,get to know you, to talk from eye to eye, present ourprojects at an info/talk or else.

So we call on you to copy and spread this irregularappearing paper. To give it into the prisons and the lastcorners of this society, so that it can be part of a anti­authoritarian debate in view of a social revolution,across the borders of visibility and encourage tosubversive action. Thanks a lot for all of your solidarityand support through words and actions....

After the spanish AnarchistGabriel Pombo da Silva wasshortly released in the summerof 2016 after being in prisonfor over 30 years with theperspective, 45 days after hisrelease, to find himself behindprison bars again, he and hiscomrade Elisa decided to gounderground and not giveback this new found freedom.At the beginning of 2017 hepublished a letter in which it isdescribed how the cops werealerted to these two and whythey had to be released after24 hours. Gabriel ended theletter with the followingwords "To those who continueto support me and show metheir unconditional love I amhere! To those who continue towant to assassinate me I amhere!" The protagonists and

their history is of smallimportance in this text. It ismore about the decision to notdance to the rhythm of lawsbut to leave during this deathdance, knowing the henchmenare right at your feet and tokeep the possibility to fightoutside of prison walls againsttheir logic and existence. Onecould think this decision onlycomes after a intensivediscussion with the peopleconcerned about theeventuality of needing to gounderground. But this is notnecessarily the case. Life doesnot go in a straight­line or asplanned and so coincidencesand garbage intersect our

plans. And mostly, exactlywhen we are not anticipatingit. For 100 comrades on therun there is at least 100 goodreasons at a 100 differentpoints in time that made thesecomrades decide to go the wayof clandestinity. So to putyourself mentally in this stateand trying vehemently toanswer the question how onewould act as personconcerned, is a nice dry run,but not more than that at all. Ainteractive phenomenon ofimagination and reality, thatshatters at each others cliffs.To assume that with adequatetechnical preparationbeforehand, one will have

certainty how oneself (as wellas things around oneself) willchange is an illusion.Certainty in the sense ofconcrete technicalprecautionary measures, forexample a first on the rundestination or reliable solidarycontacts, that offer support,will without a doubt offer ahuge advantage. But comparedto the complex whole of theproblem, this aspect ofpreparation stays a formality.One could compare it torendering first­aid, which isand continues to stayunbelievably important, but itcan not replace self­recovery.This self­recovery, understoodas your own life force, can notbe replaced by anything oranyone, are your own ideasand beliefs.

WE ARE HERE

We hope to receive contributions,suggestions, as well as criticism

on the e­mail below.We are also appreciative of translationsof every issue (which can also be send to

the e­mail), so that this can belay­outed and published.

fantasmamagazine@riseup.net(use TOR­Browser for own security)

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INTH

ISNU

MBE

R

∞

ADMIST SOCIETY...

FFaann tt aa ss mmaa

∞

∞

∞

∞

No human being can live forlong in permanent uncertainty.We need familiar things, places,other people, that we can referto and orientate on. We need acertain stability andpredictability in what waythings around us are gonnachange, as small as theperimeter may be. Our wholesurrounding might change, butits existing stays pivotal. Aswell as the existence of beingable to make own decisionsand acting in places one knowsand with people one loves.

I grew up in a society, in whichthese desires could not bedefined by the individuals, butonly from the state and itsinstitutions. They presentthemselves as a guarantor forstabilty, security and protectionof the social living together.Everything seems to work.Everything proceeds in thegiven and regulated lanes.Everybody finds their place inthis, no matter how fucked upor hopeless it seems. For everyopinion, criticism andoppositions there is room tounfold, as long as they are notleaving their lanes. As long asthe wheels are turning,everybody and everything istaking care of in this colorfulworld of goods of democracy...As B. Traven once said ­“people like nothing more thanuse well­trodden paths becausethere one feels simply safe.”

But what happens to us whenwe are being suddenlyconfronted with uncontrollable

situations, that force us to leavethese familiar lanes and paths?When suddenly not everythingis working as smoothly like itwas supposed to?Once seeing the light of dayheteronomy takes its course. Weare given no time to wonder andexplore this world, itsadventures and secrets with ourfresh children's eyes, to findanswers to the upcomingquestions... From when we arelittle we are being forced into an

all­encompassing thought­ andbehavior framework. It shapesand teaches us how we have tolive and think, teaches who wehave to be, how to look andwhat is being expected of us.We know our freedoms and

rights, know the threats whendisobeying the rules. We aresoftly and with full severityaccustomed to subordinate ourown desires for the good of agreater societal peace, we learnto exploit others and letourselves be exploited.To all the questions in theworld, answers have alreadybeen found, that do not have tobe challenged. For everythingthere are prefabricated models,that one can fall back on and

more often than not are justbeing impressed on reality.

Cracks on the whole....All these norms burn deep inour subconsciousness andengrave into our notions,

behavior patterns and actions.The goal is to restrict theindividual action and itsunimaginable possibilities andconvert it into social regulatedsequences. This goes along withmutual social control, becauseeverybody has to adapt andadhere to this code of conduct.The actions and reactions of theindividuals is foreseeable,algorithmic and constricts theirbehavior to act throughpermanent replication. If thissmoothly working society isbeing disrupted the concernedpeople are being confrontedwith many, maybeunprecedented questions. Whatwe have before perceived asomnipresent, inviolable andunchallenged existing ordercatches cracks and is notworking anymore. Thissituation calls us to look forpossible answers, cause fromthe outside we are not gettingany, so we have to try newpaths, start to act self­determined and self­organized,because it can not be delegatedanymore. These situations caninclude a vast number ofpossibilities for individual andcollective liberation andadvancements, as well aschasing individuals closer to theopen arms of the state.

When everything falls apart oneis forced to leave those lanesand might discover unknownbyways, pushes newboundaries, gets to know themand can overcome some ofthem or make them ineffective.But cracks in normality are notalways just liberating andbeautiful. They are scary andcan be painful and brutal,especially when they arecoming suddenly and with fullforce, in addition to an maybeapparent unfavorable moment.

As in littleI was being shaken by anunexpected and far­reachingevent. I lost control, my life wasgliding through my fingers.Nothing or very little wascomprehensible in this momentfor me. My own little world wasseemingly falling apart witheverything what I establisheduntil then and loved. Cause Ihad to/chose to vanish into thinair.In the past I only sporadicallylook into the topic ofclandestinity. I knew thatsituations like that are possiblewhen one

They give life orientation andact as a compass. Even moreso, when all familiar and well­known falls away and onefinds itself permanently innew places with new faces.

In a situation, where one runsthe risk of fading as a bareshadow in a grey society, thiscompass can help to use thisrole of the shadow in onesown favour. To get to know itsadvantages and appreciatethem and to be able to attackthe authority as an unknownelement of social tension.Cause anti­authoritarians onthe run also always mean tospread the conflict with anyauthority across all bordersand all corners of the world.The in the above mentionedletter I am here stands for oneindividual. But for me itstands for every single one,whose beat of clandestinityasks them day after day todance – we are here.

WHEN EVERYTHINGFALLS APART

PAGE 2

"It is not the assets whyyou are alive,

but the wishes, the venturesand the plays,

why you are alive…"(B. Traven, the dead ship)

WE ARE HERE(continuation)

A certain place. Familiar feelings and thoughts.Orientation. Memories. A thousand exciting, as wellas boring stories and one entirely personal. All thismeans home to me. Where did it go, my home? Ordid I lose ground?

When the eye of the beholder shuts, there is barelymore than nothingness, that spreads across the coldfloor of facts. We were physically separated, myhome and me. But I ask myself in retrospect howlong our lives where distancing ourselves already,when I was still there. What were these familiarfeelings and thoughts again? And what made thisplace so special? Could I, apart from the mundanegeography, really orientate myself? Every now andthen I am still reeling my fingers to this old home

there on the horizon and wondering was it ever morethan a fata morgana? I was never really made for it,much less it for me. And still I threw myself into itslocal depths to learn to understand it, myself and ourrelationship better. More often than not it had otherplans and left me back questioning. I hated and lovedit at the same time. I wanted it, but different then itwas and developed / fundamentally different! Is itpossible, I ask myself, to talk at this point still aboutmy home? I do not think so. It was not my leavingthat marked our separation. It was its glaring clarity,its social absence, its control mania and its increasing

(social) sterility, that detached us internally andfinally also externally. Time heals the fewest woundsand so I am looking back today with distance inspace and time on this home and I am disgusted andangry cause it is it which tries daily to displace andgag, what I call at home, namely my acquaintances,friendships, confidants and affinities.

Why mourn this home, when it is so keen to turn intoa monster? Maybe just because it was a knownenemy to me and I knew to find out its weaknesses,analyse them and use them. To continue this work Ihave to pick up the exploration of this still unknownterrain of my new enemy. And who knows, I mightstumble upon an extension of my familiar home...

HOME (LESS)?

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The following imprinted excerptsof the article "Keeping oneselfout the way" we extract from thebook „Incognito – Experiencesthat defy identification“ whichfirst edition was released in theyear 2003 in Italian (meanwhiletranslated in French and English). We think the selectedpassages illustrates very well the overcharging and always„unfavourable“ situation to stand suddenly in front of needingto go underground and raising important issues worth to bediscussed. The highly recommendable book consist of different

articles from mostly anarchistcomrades, which living inclandestinity at that time orwhich looking back on earlierlived experiences. They arepersonal experience reports,suggestions, as well as practical

and theoretical considerations which take the raeder alonginto different adventures ­ painfully as well as empowering ­and allows teeny impressions in the living conditions of thosewhich had to become „inexistent“ because of legalpersecution.

INCOGNITO

Today, in the year of 2018, in atime of globalized networks, inwhich everything and nothingseems equally possible at thesame time, the line betweenseemingly antithetic terms anddefinitions seems to shrinkconstantly. This line is tendingto become more and moreflexible, to elapse and slowlybut ultimately evaporate.Language as a tool ofcommunication with all itsnuances, differences andcontradictions is threatend tocorrode in the swamps ofnonsense and arbitrariness,confronted with a commodity

society whose commondenominator is reduced to thecreation of trend words andsymbolism. But this is not at allabout revelling in nostalgia,lamenting about the decay oflanguage and communication.This I will leave to theprofessors. What I am trying to

do is putting a subversive thesison the table, taking the currenttechnological changes inconsideration that are aiming atan overall interconnectedsociety – this based upon thephilosophical study and re­evaluation of a linguisticdichotomy. I am aiming at the

dichotomy between being aloneand being together. This mightsound quite mundane in thefirst place. But if we take acloser look at thesecomplementing terms in the ageof digitalized society itbecomes clear that it is indeedquite complex to actuallydefine the specificcharacteristics of these twonotions. Does the phenomenonof being alone still exist in aworld of global networks? Andif not, what does the permanentstate of being together mean forthe individuals? What does thistell about the quality of thesocial relations? Or, for puttingit like this: if a large part ofsociety experiences moments ofbeing alone and being together(understood as a interactive,directly experienced socialrelation) less and less, whichadjunct could describe their„social condition“? I decidedfor defining this state thatneither lets the individuals bealone nor together asinterlinked. Being interlinkedin this context means to be in(potential) contact with otherindividuals via algorithmiccodes without entering a socialbonding connected with certainresponsibilities. Additionally itmeans to not actually have achoice whether you want to beinterconnected or not, if you donot want to risk being socially(and econonomically)excluded. Summarized onecould say that

I’ve never had any strong feelings of belonging to one specificcountry, with its traditions and culture. I’ve never felt any rootsgrow inside me to such an extent that that could keep me in oneplace. I think that this helped when I decided ‘to go to earth’ andhide from bureaucracy and the law. The first time my house wassearched a cop asked me if I had been expecting it. My answerwas yes. I was an anarchist and known to them as such, so Iwasn’t surprised. Nor was I surprised when I realized that itwould be better ‘to have a change’. Choices like that are aquestion of responsibility. When you are fighting an enemy youwill also certainly want to escape from it and its repressive grip,even if you have to pay quite a high price and keep away from the

places and people you love. This was something that I had takeninto account, something I knew might happen to me. So I wasn’tsurprised when it became real and urgent. But I was prettyconfused, both because reality is always different to what youimagine and because I found myself in a situation I had neverexpected: becoming clandestine, not on my own or with mypartner, but with my child. […]At first it was very difficult. Even if, as I said, I had pictured thatmoment so may times, I was not ready either at a practical orpsychological level. For example, I had nowhere to go and itwasn’t easy to find a suitable place. My comrades were all wellknown to the cops and that period was not at all

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AGAINST THE

INTERCONNECTED

LONELINESS

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WHENEVERYTHING...

(continuation)

"KEEPING ONESELFOUT THE WAY"

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chooses a rebellious life, but tobe honest I antici­pated more toget imprisoned before beingable to go on the run.Accordingly it was a hard blowin the face and at the same timea very schizophrenic situation,cause like this I could keep mybeloved freedom. My thoughtswere being clouded by a heavyfog, the ground under my feetseemed to volatilize and I couldnot hold onto anything, I wasabout to fall deep.Everything seemed uncertain, Iwas being robbed of all lovedand familiar. Time heals nowounds, but it makes thoughtsclearer again (with it came backthe awareness to not be totallycommitted to this situation, thatit is up to me what I make ofthis, how I decide and act).What helps the healing of thewounds is the attack. The attackon this world, which inflictsthose wounds upon me andforces me to live heteronomous.The attack on all the visible andinvisible boundaries, that thwartin my way. But also to tacklemyself with all the anxiety anddoubts that come up. With allthe turning visible conditionednorms, that accompany me.

My otherwise outwardly focusshifted inside me, wheneverything familiar becameabsent. Long­forgotten came tothe surface and I was beingforced to explore my upcomingmemories and pain.Unbelievably what is inside ofyou... But at the same time anindescribable energy was beingdischarged, which piercedthrough my body and soul. I feltand feel a internal determinationand love for freedom, like Irarely felt before. A will to liveand the childish joy to be able toexperiment. Knowing thatmeanders and risks willaccompany me, that a thousandmonsters will stand in my way.Knowing that the ground, that Iam starting to build on again, isshaky and could collapse anymoment. Despite thesecircumstances I continue mydaily search, always in thedirection of the horizon, mydreams and desires. Cause it isnot the assets why you are alive,but the wishes, the ventures andthe plays why you are alive...

nobody is alone, nobody istogether, but everybody isinterconnected. Or, differentlyput: all are alone, all aretogether, no one is related. Forevaluating the quality of thesesocial circumstances it isimportant to take the context ofthe society in consideration.The fast development ofteleinformatics and with thisthe modern digital sphere tookonly three decades to transforminto a totality that makes it hardto imagine the current socialreality without it. Despite thefact that seeminlgy no one hasto be alone anymore – becausesocial relationships now can bereplaced by „social networks“of any kind – we areexperiencing a time in whichthe separation of the more andmore densily packedindividuals increases andincreases. If it is true, that mostindividuals feel lonely andweak, even though they are „incompany“ at any time, be itvirtually or not (being incompany is still being classifiedas the norm, and thisdemonstrates power through itsexcluding, yet fascistcharacteristic), we have to facethe question of the socialrelationships, those withourselves and those with others,for putting a subversive thesisof individual and collectiveliberation against this socialmisery.

The potential of being aloneIndividuals that prefer to be oract on their own are oftenperceived and stigmatized as

mavericks, egoist or sociallyincompetent – always basedupon the perception that thehuman being is in its coresocial and for that notsupposed to do its own stuff,without constant awareness ofthose around. The will ofbeing alone is, following thisargumentation, somethinginherently antisocial, becauseit excludes the community.Welcome to the mad world!Being abled to be alone, to bejust by yourself, feeling inconnection with yourself andothers, but sovereign fromthese others, is this anti­social..? The situation ofbeing without others andbeing confronted withyourself, and just yourself,bears an unforeseen potentialfor self­development, on a lotof levels: nothing but theabsence of everything thatpromises safety, that irritates,confuses or judges puts theindivual into a situation inwhich it can learn to perceivea situation which societydemonizes as emptiness (thelack of sending and receiving,in every sense) as anopportunity of freedom.

Here, at this point of beingalone, fantasy begings, andwith this, totally new terrainopens up for the soleindividual: the one of thespiritual extension of thehorizon, or the potentialovercoming of fears throughthe confrontation with oneself, loneliness, for example.Of course, there are noguarantees for nothing. Notfor the joy, the strengtheningof the self through theovercoming of individualfears or the developing desire

for subversion, just because ofa change of the circum­stances. But, in opposition tothe situation of beinginterconnected, being aloneserves the potential for all ofthis. A potential opportunityto leave the cage and, as a

hurricane of possibilities, putinto practice which seemedimpossible until this moment.As an experiment, which willbe followed by a lot of others.Of course these experiencesare raddled with moments ofloneliness and disorientation.But ­ comparable to a stressedmuscle, that puts cracks intothe mental interior of theindivual, which, after sometime, serve their positivereversal – mental strength­ening – these moments wontlast long. This can´t be taken

as a generic causality (mentalpain equals mentalstrengthening) but as aprocessual tendency that onecan observe in the mentalinteriority of individuals againand again.

...of being together, ofsolidarity

Linguistic dichotomies requireeach other for becomingexistent. The being alone needsthe being together (and theother way around) for definingitself. If we understand thesubversive potential of the bothof these social circumstancesand their mutual intertwiningwe understand that they containeach other, despite theirlinguistic contradiction. Be­cause who is willing to formrelations with others, to enter

responsible relationshipswithout mediation that containall facettes of humandeficiencies opens up thepossibility of recognisingoneself in words and deeds ofothers and, by doing this, thepossibility for solidarity. Butfor recognising yourself in thewords and deeds of others oneneeds a process of self­recognition, which can only becarried on by the individualitself. And with this, theindivdual is always alone.

...and their subversivestrength

If we try to perceive theinterlinked society not as aconcluded process, but as aconstant social reproduction ofthe individualized masses andas a technological developmentof those in power forpreserving the social order ­ in2018 there is not much more topropose to our potential alliesthan what our comradesproposed already a hundredyears ago: the emerging ofindividuals of self­initiave;capable of confronting theconditioned fears and doubts;capable to feel, maintain, shareand live the deep desire forsubversion; capable of formingrelations of responsibility andmutual solidarity by havingsocial relationships free frommediation; capable to refuse thesubmission that is spreadinglike cancer and the „socialcircumstance“ of intercon­nected loneliness which isconnected to it and to attackhere and now. This old proposalis maybe even more urgent thenever if we don´t want to losethe ground and basis for asocial revolution, which seemsfar, far away.

PAGE 4

calm or favourable. I think that many people were really worried and solidarity,practical and effective solidarity, was not easy to practise and therefore to find. Iwas really sorry about that, and I am still absolutely convinced that this issomething that comrades should discuss carefully in the future. I mean we shouldtry to create the minimal conditions so that comrades are not left alone with theirproblems and excluded from all their relationships. Coming back to my time inhiding, I felt the need to take all the things that made me feel ‘at home’ with mewherever we went: certain books, tapes and objects (maybe I’m a bit fetishist)that kept me in touch with my previous life. In general, we succeeded in notbeing noticed wherever we went: I introduced myself to others as a mum takingher baby on holiday to healthy resorts. It was summer and certain places wouldbe healthy for anyone! I played my part very well; I was very careful about what Itold anyone about us and tried to be coherent in my role. I also made my attention

more acute by focussing it on even the most insignificant details. It must be bornein mind that people (not to mention landlords) are very curious about a newmember of their community, and that you cannot always answer the questions(too many questions) they ask evasively, otherwise you would seem strange. Youhave to be careful because in a ‘normal’ situation questions like ‘where do youlive’, ‘what do you study’ and ‘what’s your job’ or even an invitation to dinnerthat you would rather refuse, could be annoying; and an unfriendly andunsociable answer could cause trouble. When you are in hiding it might bedangerous either to make relationships or to be too reserved. It is quite a delicatesituation. As I said, I tried to tell people the same story about myself but I alsotried not to give a picture that was too different from what I actually was. I meanthat in the long run (I’ve been in hiding for 6 years) it is impossible to becompletely different to what you are. […]I also understood that living beyond the rules and normality, with no name,surname, address, and a false number on one’s ID card stimulates creativity,imagination, and dignity, and makes you take back what’s yours. Time is yours,choosing and overcoming difficulties is yours, the decision to play the cat or themouse is yours, the moment when you decide to say ‘Stop!’ is yours. […]

"KEEPING ONESELF OUT THE WAY"(continuation)

AGAINST THEINTER...

(continuation)