Mindfulness on the go Meditation in a time stealing mode

Vinay Dabholkar vinay@catalign.com

May 31, 2015

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http://www.catalign.in/2015/05/mindfulness-on-go-my-first-workshop.html

Let’s say “hello” in the primary language of the land

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What is the primary language of the new land?

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Primary language is “Stillness” Found in the gaps between thoughts

Exercise: • Sit comfortably • Close your eyes • Observe the train of thoughts (If there is no

thought, even better!) • Notice the gaps between consecutive thoughts

(if you find any) • It’s OK if you don’t find any gaps • Duration: 2 minutes

Workshop objective

• What the is the challenge?

• What can we do?

Approach #1: Attention

Approach #2: Alertness

Approach #3: Acceptance

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A sincere request

• Don’t believe in anything anyone says – be it a scripture, a Guru or the facilitator

• Treat “believing” and “not believing” same as “don’t know” (We don’t say – I believe in C programming, I believe in sunrise)

• The most useful thing is an experiment that you can try out for yourself and check (“A Mirror”)

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The challenge

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What is the source of all this trouble?

Thought

http://www.catalign.in/2014/11/thought-as-system-by-david-bohm-book.html

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Q: It is said: Do your duty without any expectation of results. How shall I get that frame of mind?

M: You need not aspire or get any new state. Get rid of your present thoughts, that is all. Talk: 472, 15th March 1938

Sincere request: An example

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Vinay lives in Kathmandu and his family dies in the quake. He is devastated and visits Ramana in Tiruvannamalai. Tells Ramana, “My life is ruined”

Ramana’s imaginary response: Get rid of the thought, that’s all.

Your response to Ramana’s response

1. “This guy is fraud. He doesn’t even move his butt from his Ashram and claims there is no problem.”

2. “Om, Ramanaya Namah! Ramana is God. Whatever he says is true. I believe him.”

3. “Sounds weird. But let me check when I have a problem and see if I can test this approach.”

#1 and #2 are dead ends. #3 may open a door.

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What does thought do?

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#1: Creates & sustains a gap between perception and reality

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Deepika’s interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mp9f1buA_A4 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hedonic_treadmill

During depression, at the end of a very successful year as an actress (2013), Deepika Padukone felt “emptiness”. For most of us, the gap manifests in the form of worry, anxiety, anger, guilt, blame, expectations etc. – also referred to as – perpetual unsatisfactoriness or hedonic treadmill

#2: Drains energy through wasteful thinking

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http://www.catalign.in/2015/01/realizing-my-biggest-addiction-thinking.html

#3: Creates huge psychic pollution

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“All managers are useless”

Boss is mad at me…

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http://www.catalign.in/2014/11/thought-as-system-by-david-bohm-book.html

Imagine you cross your boss in the office corridor and you see that he is looking particularly unhappy and avoiding eye contact. Then you recollect that he would have seen your email that your teams’ delivery will slip this time as well. Now, it is clear to you that he is really going to take some action this time. You go to your seat and immediately start browsing job market sites. Soon you are convinced that boss is going to fire you. You start sending mails to your close friends looking for help in finding a job. You are not able to focus on your work and you come home worried.

What kinds of perception-reality gap does thought create?

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• Gap persists in spite of the knowledge • How do you work around it?

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Not all illusions are visual. There are illusions of thought which we call cognitive illusions. These can be more stubborn than visual illusions.

Two powerful cognitive illusions

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“I never misbehaved, always listened to parents and teachers, never wore a miniskirt… still I got dumped” – Rani in Queen Like Rani, we believe we understand cause-and-effect relationship – e.g. listen to parents and things will be good – an illusion of understanding

Source: Thinking, fast & slow

#1: Illusion of control

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If kids go to International school…

Understanding of cause-and-effect

Ability to predict future

3D printers will be everywhere by 2020

Illusion of skill

I will turn this company around

Source: Thinking, fast & slow

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It is not that we don’t understand anything…

The problem is….we have unlimited capacity to ignore our ignorance.

WYSIATI-rule: What you see is all there is (Management case study syndrome)

Source: Thinking, fast & slow

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“I listened raptly to a long symphony on a disc that was scratched near the end, producing a shocking sound and the bad ending ruined the whole experience”

#2 Illusion

Source: Thinking, fast & slow

#2: Illusion of experience

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Pleasantness

Time • Peak-end rule • Duration neglect

Kahneman’s TED talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgRlrBl-7Yg

The selfie-syndrome (or sunset-syndrome)

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“What we learn from the past is to maximize the qualities of our future memories, not necessarily of our future experience. This is the tyranny of the remembering self.” -- Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, fast & slow

Get a feel of the dysfunction

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Proprioception

Exercise: • Stand up with no obstacle in front • and close your eyes • Raise your arm – pointing in front direction • Slowly move it to the left & then to the right (say 20

degrees) • Let it drop as if limp • Press it against the chair & feel the pressure

• Duration: 5 minutes

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proprioception

3 types of movement awareness

Movement type:

1. Sideways movement – spatial awareness

2. Dropping of hand – voluntary vs involuntary

3. Pressure of hand – pressure awareness

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What if some of these awareness are damaged?

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Ian Waterman

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• At the age of 19, Ian lost spatial awareness of body movement below neck

• Can’t feel his hand/feet position • Only when he can see, he can move his leg • It is as if you are missing your step every moment

http://www.okjdiscoveries.com/articles/mind-bomb/2013/12/ian-walterman-without-proprioception

Leper dressing at Anandwan

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• Pressure awareness damaged • Apply too much pressure inadvertently

http://travelwithgrace.me/category/meditation/

Now imagine if you lose the awareness to know if the movement of your hand is voluntary or involuntary

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You don’t know if • You are moving your hand, or • Your neighbour is moving your hand, or • Gravity is moving your hand

Thought is like a body-part

• All humans have a common dysfunction

• We don’t know if a train of thought is:

– A solution to a problem you are working on, or

– A response to a remark from the person sitting next to me, or

– A response to an imaginary scenario like losing my job in the future

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http://www.catalign.in/2014/11/thought-as-system-by-david-bohm-book.html

Let’s see the dysfunction in a magnified form & a glimpse of the

solution

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A beautiful mind

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojmWRWijVfQ (movie)

http://www.catalign.in/2015/03/a-beautiful-mind-and-three-acts-of.html

How could you, John?

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“How could you believe that extra-terrestrials are sending you messages?”

“Because, the ideas I had about supernatural beings came to me the same way that my mathematical ideas did. So I took them seriously.”

http://www.catalign.in/2015/03/a-beautiful-mind-and-three-acts-of.html

Nash’s “weight-loss” process

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“It is a continuous process rather than waking up from a dream. It is a matter of policing one’s thoughts trying to recognize paranoid ideas and rejecting them, just the way somebody who wants to lose weight has to decide consciously to avoid fats or sweets.”

http://www.catalign.in/2015/03/a-beautiful-mind-and-three-acts-of.html

Approach: Nash vs Deepika

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Deepika’s interview advocated getting expert help to solve a problem such as depression. Nash advocated applying your own mind to solve the problem of the mind.

What is mindfulness?

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Mindfulness

1. Attention in the present moment (not in the past or future)

2. Alertness about what is arising and passing away e.g. thoughts, emotions, sense perceptions

3. Acceptance of reality as it is without judgment

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http://www.catalign.in/2014/07/three-practices-from-eckhart-tolles.html

A two state model

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Relatively undisturbed

Disturbed

It is better to start the practice in the “Relatively undisturbed” state

Attention

Alertness

Acceptance

Approach #1: ATTENTION Shift attention out of thinking

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Metaphor #1: Wiper & road

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Don’t try to control the wiper, instead shift the focus away from wiper on to the road

Metaphor source: https://nachiketasquest.wordpress.com/2014/04/08/focus-on-the-road-some-wisdom-from-mooji/

Image source: http://www.ehow.co.uk/how_7313829_replace-country-windshield-wiper-arm.html

Metaphor #2: train & platform

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Whenever you get an opportunity, hop off the train and observe the trains from the platform

Metaphor source: http://ashramof1.tumblr.com/post/86281899767

Image source: http://retirementjourney.blogspot.in/2010/11/coonoor-to-kathmandu-4-9-november-2010.html

Lineage

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Mooji (source of both metaphors)

What is the platform or anchor?

You can use any of these as the anchor:

Feel the movement / change:

• Breath (at the tip of the nostrils)

• Abdomen

• Tingling in the hand / fingers

• Surrounding sounds

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Exercise

• Sit comfortably

• Close your eyes

• Shift attention at the tip of the nostril and feel the incoming & outgoing breath (5 min)

• Shift attention to the rising and falling movement of abdomen (5 min)

• Cross your fingers and shift attention to the tingling in the fingers especially where they cross each other (5 min)

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When do we do this? • Waiting:

– At the traffic light – For the lift – For your turn at the grocery checkout counter – For your laptop to switch on

• Introduce a moment of wait: – Answering the phone, starting your car, taking first bite

• Mundane activities (means to an end to end) – Restroom break -- Jogging – Commercial break -- Washing dishes – Walking from here to there -- sweeping – Opening a door

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Approach #2: ALERTNESS Catch yourself getting lost in thought

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Catch me if you can – A game

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About to get angry

Getting angry

Angry Anger subsiding

Anger Intensity

Stage-1

Stage-2

Stage-3

“Gotcha” point

http://www.catalign.in/2014/02/eckhart-tolles-catch-me-if-you-can.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqX5IFKYFWk (video – Dealing with anger, resistance and pessimism)

Eckhart Tolle – author of the game

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mz0e9LrOsyk (A chapter by chapter webinar based on 10 chapters of “A New Earth” with skype calls all around the world)

Identify “buttons” first

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This began most recognizably with the rejection of politically oriented thinking as essentially a hopeless waste of intellectual effort

Source: A beautiful mind, by Sylvia Nasar, chapter 47, Remission

What is wasteful? LOST in thought

• L(abel): Right / Wrong, Good / Bad

• O(wnership): Car, House, Idea, Relationship

• S(tory): Victim, Villain (guilt, blame, worry)

• T(ime): Past / Future

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Press the “button” voluntarily

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http://www.catalign.in/2014/11/thought-as-system-by-david-bohm-book.html

Approach #3: ACCEPTANCE This is what it is. What next?

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Metaphor #1: Stuck in the mud

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If you are stuck in the mud, the first thing you need to say is “Yes. I am stuck in the mud.” What doesn’t help is: “Why did I get stuck? I wish I had not come here…”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/12/bad-memories-eckhart-tolle-how-to-deal_n_2260002.html?ir=India&adsSiteOverride=in

Image src: http://www.bryanzimmermansblog.com/why-do-so-many-just-give-up-on-making-money-online-how-to-keep-yourself-out-of-this-rut

Metaphor #2: Friend’s mom’s story

• Husband passed away

• Friend’s mom behaving as though he is alive

• “I need to get back and prepare dinner for him”

• Until a time, when she accepts the death of her husband

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Metaphor #3: Release the pedal

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Acceptance is also known as – non-resistance A shift from effort to non-effort

Image source: http://lifehackery.com/2008/09/28/automotive/

Seneca’s write-off method

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Every night, before going to bed, mentally write off everything you own / possess: wealth, job, relationships etc.

If you still have them in the morning, treat it as a bonus.

http://www.valueinvestingworld.com/2012/01/nassim-taleb-on-seneca.html

Write-off at the end of every action

• Sending mail – write-off response

• Ordering online – write-off delivery

• Request for meeting – write-off response

• Telling your son to do something – write-off his compliance

• Applying for a job – write-off favourable response

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Universal “yes” to everything

Meditation is a universal “yes” to everything

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This is how it is. What next?

http://non-duality.rupertspira.com/about/rupert-spira

Metric: Progress indicators

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Metric

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Focus Parameters

Attention How many times you are able to hop off the train of thinking on the platform in a day?

Alertness How do you respond to challenging situations? (loss of something/someone, when you are hurt etc.)

Alertness How many times are you able catch yourself getting LOST (Label, Ownership, Story, Time) in thought?

Alertness How many times are you able to catch yourself before or during an emotional surge?

Acceptance How many times are you able to catch yourself building an expectation at the end of an action (sending email)?

Acceptance How many times are you able to detect internal resistance and release the pedal?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmQJaFV0y0w

Thank You

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