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Have you ever asked yourself, “Why am I still single? What’s wrong with me?” You’re a smart, successful woman who has worked hard to create a life you love. You’re in control of your career, and you have a clear plan for your future and how you’re going to get there.

You have everything . . . except the right person to share it with. It’s easy to feel like something is wrong with you. I get it. I’ve been there! I was single with a PhD, teaching at a prestigious university in a city where most women complained about the dating scene. However, I soon discovered that the real reason I was single had little to do with where I lived, the kind of career I had or how old I was. I was making deadly dating mistakes, but I didn’t know it! I needed someone to come alongside me and show me the way. Once I fixed those issues, I met and married my dream man in just 11 short months! We now have 2 children and an amazing life together.

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Now that I’m a matchmaker and dating coach I’ve seen smart, successful women like you make the same mistakes I used to make. I want to help you break those dating patterns so you can find and keep the love of your life. That’s why I put together this eBook to help you understand once and for all, why you’re still single, and most importantly, what you can do to take control of your love life and find love now! The reason you’re still single isn’t because there’s something wrong with who you are. You’re still single because you’re making deadly mistakes that ruin your chance at the relationship you really want deep in your heart. And you didn’t know it. Until now. Here are the top 3 mistakes smart, successful women make that keep them single.

1) You’re Too Busy

Did you know the average single person in the US hasn’t been on a date in 2 years?! Most successful women I coach are just too busy to date or to put the time and effort into building a relationship. One client in particular comes to mind. Let’s call her Sheryl.

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Sheryl is a gorgeous woman in her 30s. She’s quickly climbing the corporate ladder and she loves her career! After a string of relationships with emotionally unavailable men, she’s decided she won’t settle for anything less than an amazing relationship. “I meet a lot of people. I just don’t like any of them. And that online dating thing? Ugh!” she said. So she’s decided to follow the advice everyone gives her. “Just focus on enjoying your life! The right man will come along. Don’t wait for some guy to rescue you.” Sheryl does everything with her heart and soul, so when she decided to enjoy her life, she went for it!

• She’s a leader in her church (she’s there every Sunday) and is on almost every committee you can think of (she’s got meetings after church and during the week)

• She’s physically active and works out 5 days a week. • She’s joined competes in speech competitions on

Saturdays. • She volunteers at a youth organization mentoring

young girls • She has weekly girl’s night out with her friends.

It’s not surprising, then, that whenever someone asks Sheryl how she’s doing, she says, “BUSY!” All of Sheryl’s activities make for a full life and an impressive resume. But there’s no room for another person. If you think it’s unfair that I’m telling you to cut out some of your extra activities to focus on finding love, consider this story from a man who was dating a woman just like Sheryl.

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He was in love with her, but decided to break up because she was just too busy. She was always cancelling dates and had recently signed up for another volunteer activity without talking to him first. He felt like he wasn’t a priority in her life and figured it wasn't worth investing his time into their relationship. Here’s the deal: You’ve invested time, money and energy into building your career and creating the life you want. It didn’t just happen. You’ll have to make a similar investment into your love life. Great relationships don’t just happen!

2) You’re Too Picky

You’re a powerful, successful woman and you want a high-quality man who is ready for a relationship. I’m here to tell you, you deserve one! However, the way you’re going about trying to find him is limiting your options. Now before you think I’m picking on you, ponder this: If you’re looking for a success-oriented, relationship-ready man who is tall, handsome, in great shape, and who shares your interests and values, you’ve got a big problem.

Dr.  Aesha  says:  If  you’re  unavailable,  you  will  attract  (and  choose)  an  unavailable  man.  

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Ponder this:

• The top six-figure income earners make up 1% of the US population.

• Professional African American woman outnumber

professional African American men 3:1.

• 80-90% of church congregations are made up of women!

• Most men in their 30s and 40s tend to look for

women in their 20s. If you’re looking for a man who can match you in income, goals, values and more, this is what your dating pool looks like:

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With such a narrow dating pool, you’ll need help finding your ideal partner. You’ll also need to know which qualities you should be picky about. Tall + handsome + a great paying job doesn’t necessarily add up to the perfect partner. You and I know that such a man could be narcissistic and too busy with his career to give you the love, attention and respect you deserve! What’s more, looking for someone who’s a lot like you can lead to a lot of friction in your relationship.

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3) You’re Making Too Many Dating Disconnects Maybe you’re already a dating machine and you’ve gotten really clear about the kind of man you’re looking for. However, if you still haven’t met the right man you could be making big mistakes in the early stages of a relationship that can cause a man to disappear. Maybe you had a “great” first date: He seemed to really like you and he promised to call you back. He even kissed you passionately to say good night! The chemistry was there and you knew he had great potential. Then . . . days passed with you staring at your phone, waiting for the call. Worse yet, you spent even more time trying to figure out what you did wrong to scare him away. "Maybe he's not ready for a relationship? Was he really attracted to me? He's just intimidated by my success. . ." Why didn't he call you back? Rachel Greenwald has an answer for you in her book, Have Him At Hello: Confessions From

Dr.  Aesha  says:  You  can  have  the  man  you  want,  but  to  ?ind  him,  you  have  to  

get  clear  on  what  the  kind  of  attributes  he’ll  need  to  have  to  make  

your  relationship  work.    

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1,000 Guys About What Makes Them Fall In Love . . . Or Never Call Back. As a matchmaker and dating coach, Greenwald wanted to figure out why some of her clients had great first dates that fizzled out while others turned into amazing relationships. She decided to ask the guys in what she called "Exit Interviews." With permission from her clients, Greenwald called the dates and asked them straight up: Why didn't you call her back? The resulting feedback was surprising: 90% of the time, the women were wrong about why a guy disappeared! With results from 1000 interviews, Greenwald was able to pinpoint major dating patterns and mistakes women were making on first dates and in the early stages of a relationship. 1. The Boss Lady: You're too argumentative, controlling, or competitive during the first date. The interviewees said they enjoyed stimulating conversation, but they didn't want to feel like they were at a business lunch or political debate. One man put it this way: "I'm looking for a wife, not a business associate." You call it being forthright or direct, but the guys felt that it was aggressive and "unfeminine." Some of the guys also said that when a woman offered to pay for the date or a showed up in to a date wearing her work clothes, they felt she wasn't feminine enough and didn't want a second date. 2. The Flasher: You think you're being open and vulnerable by sharing your deepest, darkest secrets on your first date. He thinks you have issues! Give him more time to get to know you before revealing all your quirks.

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3. The Ex-Factor: Don't talk about your EX on a first date. No matter how you try to bring him up, you'll risk coming across as bitter or still attached. And scrub your social media profiles of any mentions of your ex, even if you're still friends. 4. The Closer: Instead of casually getting to know your date, you "interview him" with probing questions. A guy can tell that you're digging for information when you ask questions about his family & dating history, how much he makes per year or whether he thinks he 'll ever get married and have kids.

None of these mistakes have anything to do with your worth as a person, but being aware of the mistakes you’re making can help you have more control of your love life.

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I hope you enjoyed this eBook! If you’re ready to turn your love life around, I’m ready to help. To learn more about our matchmaking and coaching services, please email me at aesha@aeshaonline.com. Or, you can book your complimentary Romance Plan session now at https://aeshaonline.youcanbook.me/

Dr.  Aesha  says:  I  know  you  don't  want  to  waste  time  on  the  wrong  person,  but  slow  down!  Focus  on  making  a  connection  on  a  date  by  

being  open  and  authentic.    

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I’d love to see if we have something that’s a fit for you and your dreams of love and happiness.

To true love,

Dr. Aesha

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About Dr. Aesha

Dr. Aesha is quickly emerging as the go-to matchmaker, dating coach and relationship strategist for smart, successful women. She equips, empowers and inspires her listeners and clients with strategies to help them find and keep love in the ever-changing modern dating world. How does a college professor become a professional matchmaker and dating coach? After years of making painful dating mistakes, including a broken engagement to an emotionally & verbally abusive man she dated while in college, Dr. Aesha overcame low self-esteem and discovered secrets to how men think & what makes relationships last. She met and married her dream man after 11 short months of dating and has been happily married since 2006. Dr. Aesha quickly noticed that the matchmaking & dating coaching industry didn’t speak to the special needs and unique

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experiences of African American professional women or women of faith. Drawing on her academic expertise researching African American women’s voices, Dr. Aesha gives unique strategies for women of color in their search for love and marriage. Author of the book, Can I Help A Sister Out: How To Meet & Marry The Man of Your Dreams and founder of AeshaOnline.com, a community with free resources on dating, marriage, and relationships, Dr. Aesha has become known for her uncommon wisdom, inspiration and tell-it-like-it is relationship advice. Dr. Aesha holds a PhD in Rhetoric and Composition from The Pennsylvania State University (University Park, PA), a Master’s in English from The Pennsylvania State University (University Park,PA), and a Bachelor’s Degree in English and Secondary Education from Marquette University (Milwaukee, WI). Dr. Aesha is currently studying with the Matchmaking Institute to obtain certification as a matchmaker. She lives in Ventura, California with her husband and two children.