Dondi’s Family Album

Many of you have asked about my personal life. . .What made mine and Titanya’s parents put us into Polynesian and Middle Eastern dance lessons? Are our parents dancers? Did I go to college? What other kind of work do I do?

When I was a little girl I wanted to be a tortoise. You know, the pretty girls who served drinks on airplanes. I could never remember the word, “stewardess” so to me the most beautiful women on earth were the tortoises. Of course, I wasn’t old enough to be a tortoise, so the next best thing was to be a baby Dorothy Hamil. My mom bought me the haircut, the little skating dress and she even put me into ice skating les-sons.I wanted to do flips through

the air but just kept falling on my face. I gave up. I wanted to be a tortoise and Dorothy Hamil, but I knew absolutely that I would end up being an actress.

I would be on the big screen and no one could tell me any different. It was my “calling” from a very early age and I was in theatre at 6 years old. I had booked lots of commercials and some film by 20. That was

my passion. I had a bigger crush on acting than any boy I ever met. I WAS Scarlet O’Hara, Marilyn Monroe and all three Charlie’s Angels--at least inside my head.

Other ideas of what I wanted to be waxed and waned, but the one career I knew about was acting. The life path I never wanted or really cared to know about was belly dancing. My sister, Titanya, was the harem girl on Halloween-- not me. Belly dancing wasn’t even a career; it was some kind of made up, mystical dance out of the past--perfect for Hal-loween! Belly dancers weren’t real. To me belly dancers were aggressive women who lived in the desert. Yuck. I hated heat and sandy places with no water (that would make any-one aggressive). To me belly dancers had dark eyes, dark

hair and gigantic bellies. I was fair, with green eyes, and trying to stay thin as long as I can remember, so that image didn’t resonate with me at all. As for the music, forget it!

I had heard some Middle Eastern

My first real theatre job. “A Cry of Players” at Palomar College in which I played Shakespeare’s daughter. I’m 6 years old and sitting with my dad (in hat) and the

director, Buddy Ashbrook during rehearsal.

Tanya and Mom celebrated Tanya’s 3rd birthday early because Mom knew I would be born on Tanya’s birthday. I was Tanya’s

birthday present!

music in a marketplace on a trip to Fiji with my family when I was 8 years old and it hurt my ears. To me it sounded like old, starving women crying. It wasn’t pretty. We were excited to be in Fiji because Titanya and I had been in Poly-nesian dance lessons since before 5 years old. We loved the fun costumes and the beauty of the is-land music. We started Polynesian dance lessons like a lot of children start any type of lesson. In this case, we were living in Del Mar, California and Shelby Williams brought her poi balls to “show and tell” in my kindergarten class. I told mom about it and she suggest-ed that I start lessons. Mom and

dad both encouraged my sister and I to stick with the lessons and be a part of all the “little girl” shows.

How we yearned to be a part of the “big girl” shows. We did hundreds of “ami’s” hoping to be big girls. Well, all of those “ami’s” paid off. Of course, I didn’t know they were paying off. I secretly wanted to be a ballerina. I loved tutu’s! Mom and Dad encouraged ballet too, but my plump hips and budding figure discouraged my dreams

of flying through the air like a lithe swan. I didn’t start belly dancing lessons when I was 12 because I wanted to. I started them because our house was falling apart! My mom, sister and I moved to Oregon and bought a 100-year-old church. To us it made the perfect home . . . but it needed some major work.

We didn’t have any money for repairs so mom would get things fixed on trade. Mom was a masseuse and heal-er. When the “pipe fixer guy” told Mom that his wife was a professional belly dancer, she gave both of them massages in trade for belly dance lessons for me, Titanya and mom. We had lessons in our sanctu-ary after school and had a lot of fun trying to outdo each

other with “neck slides.” It was

perfect, especially since there were few Polynesian teachers in Oregon to continue our “hula” studies with. I didn’t take belly dancing seriously for another 10 years. It was just a fun thing I took as a hobby, and it never took the place of summer theatre or acting classes.

Acting is where I really focused, until college. In college there was something that took the place of

Dondi and Tanya’s Mutual Birthday September 30th ~ Las Vegas

My Dad just presented me with the trophy for Best Score in the Nation for “Expository Speaking” in front of 400 fellow

competitors. ~ National Championships, Minnesota.

acting AND dance. Speech and Debate! With the urgings (force) of our Dad, Titanya and I went to college (begrudgingly) and joined the Speech and Debate team. I dreamed of run-ning around Eu-rope or hoping the first bus to Hollywood but instead, went to Palomar College in San Marcos, California.

There our father was the head coach of the Speech and Debate team and the chairperson of the Speech, Theatre, Dance, and ASL Department -- so whatever he said, went. I tried to explain to him that I barely graduated from high school and that I would probably flunk college. It didn’t matter. I think my Dad was in denial. Ray Dahlin’s daughters were supposed to love school and have no problem

getting good grades! So, barely hanging on to a high school diploma, Dad enrolled my sister and I in over 28 units apiece, and over 5 events on the nationally acclaimed speech team. A member of the Speech

team?? I had never even raised my hand in class!

Dad believed that Tanya and I could be Speech & Debate champions. I didn’t want to disappoint him. So, along with Tanya, I worked hard for two years, going to tournaments almost every weekend, perfecting my voice and articulation, and researching, memorizing and revising speeches over and over and over.

These were absolutely some of the best times of my life. I was part of a team with my Dad and sister! The second year of col-lege I was invited to join the Deans list and also received an “Outstanding Speaker in the Nation” award amongst U.S. colleges, and was awarded MVP by my peers at Pal-omar College for the second year in a row. It was a very pride-filled and special time. The following are some of my speeches and events that were my life for two years:

• EXPOSITORY: “Kabuki Theatre of Ja-pan” and “Artificial Skin for Burn Victims”

• PERSUASIVE: “Dangerous Trucks in the U.S. Trucking Industry” and “Dangerous Toys aimed at Children”

• COMMUNICATIONS ANALYSIS: “The Rhetoric of War Songs”

• POETRY: “The Congo” By Vachel Lindsey, “The Ballad of Judas Iscariot” (various poets)

• PROSE: “Sophie’s Choice” By William Styron. “Et Cum Spiritu Tuo” By Karen Marie

Krista Minns

• DUET ACTING: “Yentl” Adapted from the movie. “A Moon for the Misbegotten” By Eugene O’Neil

• READERS THEATRE: “All in the Golden Afternoon,” (The true story of Alice in Wonderland.) “A Spy in the House of Love, “ The diaries and stories of Anais Nin”

In two years, at over 30 tourna-ments in six different states, I worked my buns off with a team of wonderful people, who also worked their buns off, to take 2nd in the Nation as a collegiate speech and debate team.

Personally I won over 150 tro-phies.

At the two National Champion-ship Tournaments (the “Olympics” of speech and debate) I garnered the following wins:

Dondi ~ Dad ~ Tanya

• “Artificial Skin” ~ GOLD

• “All in the Golden Afternoon” ~ GOLD and “The Huffer-Goldman Award” (best Readers Theatre in the nation voted on by our fellow competitors)

• “A Spy in the House of Love” ~ GOLD• “Sophie’s Choice” ~ SILVER

• “Kabuki Theatre” ~ SILVER

• “Dangerous Trucks” ~ BRONZE

• “Runner-Up ~ Outstanding Speaker in the Nation.”

It was a happy, confidence building time. Being a part of a team was endearing, valuable and amaz-ingly supportive. I left Palomar on an extreme high and soon after moved to Hollywood to pursue my dreams of acting. There I plum-meted to extreme lows and found myself despairingly alone in a very scary world. The memories from my years in Hollywood are for another place and time - not a web site. Perhaps someday a book.

Mom and Dad always instilled their belief in my sister and me and that is what has always given me the confidence to move for-ward with courage, even when I’m scared.

And yes, our Mom and Dad are amazing dancers and speakers! Dad as our ballroom dance partner

has spoiled both Tanya and me. It’s nearly impos-sible to find anyone as good.

How did belly danc-ing become my life? At twenty years old I was liv-ing inHollywood, going on auditions and scraping by with waitress jobs andborrowed rent from my Dad. What could I do that would bring in money and be fun and flexible? Something had already been with me for half my life. . . belly dancing. Belly dancing at ritzy Hollywood parties was fun and did bring in some cash.

I danced across Florida, where I had moved to in my early twenties for the ex-ploding commercial market. But by 1995 I wanted to be closer to family on the West Coast of the U.S., so I moved to San Diego to be near my father.

Belly dance took off! In a city with the 2nd largest Chaldean population in the U.S. and a growing Arabic and Persian community, belly dancing became a career. I’ve studied hard to learn not only about the dance but also about the music, people, culture and religions.

And the music no longer hurts my ears! In fact, I’m in love with it--can’t live without it--and belly dance is now my main source of income. I travel all over the world as a

Dad and I dancing together during one of my shows.

teacher and performer while I keep a home in San Diego.

I’ve worked jobs from custodian to model to speech consultant. Currently, when I’m not dancing, I

work as a tour guide in San Diego and Baja, and occasionally audition for film, television, and voice-overs. My passion is traveling, which I am blessed to do often through “on location” acting jobs and dance contracts in various parts of the world.

When spare time pops up, you can bet that I’m spend-ing it with my Dad, my sister , or my Mom and her husband David, in various parts of the world. Noth-ing is more important to me than my family. They are phenomenal.I sacrificed precious and happy times with them when I lived in Hollywood--and for what? Empty promises of arrogant cast-ing directors and inflated dreams that never will come true.

My past dreams won’t come true because the Hollywood I’ve dreamt about doesn’t exist. I’m not willing to sell my soul to the devil for the

one that does.

I never want to sacrifice my family and friends again for demeaning cattle calls and a hellish existence that breeds insecurity. I will never do that again. I have too good of a life!

In sha’allah.~ Dondi

Dondi & Dad dance during her show atTroy’s Greek Cuisine in San Diego

Me (left) and Tanya (right) with our Mom in Northern California

Our family today: Donna, Tiernan, David, Titanya, Jeff, Roger, DondiEsalen, 2010

The End