Amazing Grace

My true, personal account of God’s Amazing Grace!

By: Misha HinesAccompanied with “Amazing Grace” by Darlene Zschech

As always I couldn't sleep, but what the good Lord did for me in the early hours of the morning made it all so worth it!

Before I tell you what happened, I have to give you an idea about the place my

heart was in.

My heart has been full of MANY things from constant money problems, to

someone very near to my heart committing suicide recently, to

issues with my marriage.  Not to mention everything from the past,

beginning as far back as 5 years old.  I have never been able to "give it to

God" as I've been told to do, no matter how badly I wanted to.  Also, for about the past year I have been

in an off and on fight with my mentor, who not only saved my life but introduced me to God.  As some

may imagine, this has been weighing VERY heavy on my heart, especially knowing that it was mostly because

of me that we fought.

Ok so this is what He did for me.....I was on my porch crying and praying

out loud, from the bottom of my heart; I was asking for forgiveness, confessing all my flaws, anxieties, fears and convictions, all my guilt and sorrows as well as expressing

how THANKFUL I am for everything in my life whether good or bad.  I was

admitting how difficult it is for me to give Him all those things I badly

needed to give Him, even though He has shown me time and time again

that it's ok, that He's got this.

I was asking Him to somehow show my mentor that I am truly sorry, and to

somehow show her what's deep within my heart; because even though I am thankful for everything He has given me, the gift

of her was different, special.  Without Him I know I wouldn't have met her, but

without her I would have NEVER known Him.

I told Him, "God, tonight I am opening my heart wide for You to take it ALL; every fear, anxiety, regret, flaw, every broken

piece of my heart I have held on to because I cannot change, I cannot move on until I give it all to You." I begged Him to PLEASE take it all, so that He could fix my heart, to make it perfect again - as He

sees it.

In that moment I closed my eyes and He showed them ALL to me as He took them, like a very vivid slideshow.  Everything I

was holding on to from my dad's death to my being molested as a child; to regrets

over mistakes I have made with my mentor, my husband and children, and so

many others in the past; the guilt and sorrow I had felt over my own suicide attempts, and fears I had for my kids,

along with all the money problems; to the guilt I held, feeling I had failed my dear friend who committed suicide.  ALL the sadness within my heart, EVERYTHING.

I wept UNCONTROLLABLY, with everything I am as He showed me what He was taking away,

and what I had been holding on to for so long.All of those feelings and emotions that I felt in

that moment were SO overpowering; it's unexplainable, unimaginable

Even to me!

Then......

It suddenly stopped, all tears were gone; I felt nothing but peace and an AMAZING LOVE!  No more sadness, no more fear, no more regret,

no more guilt, no more sorrow; I was no longer broken.  It was nothing like I have ever

experienced before, let alone imagined I would experience.

All I could say was, "Thank you for taking them!"  I think I was in shock because I had never really believed I deserved His mercy, His Amazing Grace and He had just shown me

that I do!

As I sit here reflecting on this experience; I am praying for ALL

of mankind to experience His love in some kind of AMAZING

way as I have, because until you feel it for yourself, you can never

truly understand the depth of His Almighty, UNDYING Love for

YOU.

Thank You for listening, I am praying for you!

I have no other way to end my story than with my favorite bible verse: