yhc magazine - march 2013

MARCH 2013www.yhcmagazine.com

VENTURA COUNTY CONEJO VALLEY MALIBU WEST SAN FERNANDO VALLEY

BRING NATURE INTO YOUR WORLD / ENDOMETRIOSIS / MERCURY DISPOSAL IN THE DENTAL OFFICE/McGRATH FAMILY FARM / GLUTEN SENSITIVITIES / THE HEALING COMPASS & QI CENTER INWOODLAND HILLS / BUDDHISM IN ART / THE REFILL SHOPPE IN VENTURA +MORE!

S U S T A I N A B L E A W A R E N E S S

People are always talking about Dr.V behind his back.

Thank you!

“Gave me my life back”

“Best in the area”

“Truly Grateful”

“Well Mannered, Understanding and Sympathetic”

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“I highly recommend”

Anthony A. Virella, MD, FACS

Diplomate, American Board of Neurological SurgeryFellow, American College of SurgeonsM.D., 1996 Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons, New York, N.Y

Complex Spine & Brain Specialists

1250 LaVenta Drive, Suite 200 • Westlake Village, CA 91361

805.449.0088 office • 805-449-0046 fax

New Simi Valley Office Location1687 Erringer Road, Suite 206 • Simi Valley CA 93065

805.955.8898 office • 805.955.8828 fax

www.dr-virella.com

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14/ SPECIAL HEALTH BULLETINHolistic/Biological Dentistry Helping the Planet and YouBy Dr. David Villarreal

18/ HEALTH VIEW 1Organic Mattresses for Your Comfort and HealthBy Alicia Doyle

20/ HEALTH VIEW 2Bully or Wimp?—Striking the Husbandly BalanceBy Wayne M. Levine / Director, BetterMen Coaching

22/ BEYOND GREEN LIVINGExpand Your Reach into NatureBy Jan Tucker

32/ MIND & SPIRIT Do You Know That Your Partner is a Reflection of You?By Bruce Derman, PhD

36/ EAST/WESTSerious Cramps or Endometriosis? Important to Find OutBy Denise Noyer-Erez, L.Ac. FABORM

FEATURES

Contents S U S T A I N A B L E A W A R E N E S S

06/ PUBLISHER’S LETTERTHE NEW NORMAL

09/ FYI CHEMICAL-FREE LAUNDRY DETERGENT AND SOFTENER?

26/ NATURAL APPROACHAUTOIMMUNE DISEASE AND GLUTEN SENSITIVITYBy Dr. Sharon Norling

30/ ENVIRONMENTTHE REFILL SHOPPESAVING THE PLANET CAN BE FUN!By Jan Tucker

40/ FROM THE HEARTTHREADS OF AWAKENING—BUDDHISM IN ARTBy Alicia Doyle

42/ COMPASSIONATE EATINGMCGRATH FAMILY FARM—A LIVING HERITAGEBy Bianca Rose Martinez

10/ CONNECTIONA CENTER FOR ACUPUNCTURE,COMMUNITY AND HEALINGBy Alicia Doyle


ANN K. CASTLEFOUNDER & PUBLISHER

THERE IS NO DENYING IT—our planet is changing. The corre-lation between the levels of pollution and the drastic weatherchanges, backed by extensive scientific data, is the wake-up call wehave been ignoring for too long. It has become the new normal.

Planet earth has been and always will be our responsibility. It is ourhome and frankly, up to now we haven’t been doing our best to keepher clean. You wouldn’t sweep dirt under your rug would you? Keepdoing it and the pile becomes apparent.

That is what we are doing to our planet. Industrial waste, pesti-cides, plastics, oil spills, genetic modification of our food—the accu-mulation of these toxins have resulted not only in Mother Earthbecoming ill, but all living creatures as well. We live in a toxic worldand it is quite apparent by the growing cases of cancer, heart dis-ease, diabetes and severely compromised immune systems.

In this issue, we provide ongoing information about the importanceof our farming community and eating and supporting local growers,living a sustainable life beyond the green concept and introducingthe remarkable people who run a peaceful and healthy environmentfor nurturing the mind, body and spirit—the Healing Compass andQi Center in Woodland Hills.

Starting with this issue YHC would like to introduce Jan Tucker ofWhite Lotus Living who will inform and empower us with informa-tion about beyond green living. We also explore several healthissues and how they can be treated and managed with alternativeand integrative approaches.

Some of you may not agree with the studies that global warming is here. I only ask that you open your hearts and minds to what is happening around us and learn about the credible studies. YHCMagazine will always present these issues and more with responsi-bility and our full commitment to you.

With Peace, Love, Blessings and Gratitude,

ERRATUM: Regarding the article we ran in the January 2013 issue,Health View 1 Planning forLife’s Transitions: The End Journey:

Subsequent to publication ofthe last article in the series,Carol was advised by a rep-utable source that the policiesand procedures for paramedicsfor treating people before andduring transit to a hospital arevery complex and can poten-tially be influenced by DNRs,Healthcare Directives, and thePOLST form, as well as perti-nent laws in the county andstate in which the emergencyoccurs. A correction to theparagraph "9-1-1 Services" anddetailed information willappear in a forthcoming article,“From the Gurney to the ER."

The NewNormal

PUBLISHER’S LETTER S U S T A I N A B L E A W A R E N E S S

SHAPE UPwith YHC Magazinein the April FITNESS ISSUE.Don't miss this issuepacked with usefulinformation to look and feel yourvery best!Available April 1st


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DIRECTOR OF SALES & MARKETINGLAURA MUSTACCHIO

[email protected]

COPY EDITOR ANN K. CASTLE

JAN TUCKER, MBA

ACCOUNTING DONNA BRYANT

ADVERTISINGMARIAN GREEN

[email protected]

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERSMARY MYERS AND JEFF SLOANE

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS BRUCE DERMAN, PHD;

ALICIA DOYLE; SHARON NORLING, MD, MBA;

DENIS NOYER-EREZ, LAC, FABORM;BIANCA MARTINEZ; JAN TUCKER,

MBA; WAYNE M. LEVINE, MA; DAVID VILLARREAL, DDS.

COVERAGE AREA INCLUDESMONTHLY TO VENTURA COUNTY,WEST SAN FERNANDO VALLEY,

MALIBU AND THE CONEJO VALLEY;AGOURA HILLS, CALABASAS,

CAMARILLO, ENCINO, MOORPARK,NEWBURY PARK, NORTHRIDGE, OAK

PARK, OXNARD, SIMI VALLEY,TARZANA, THOUSAND OAKS,

VENTURA, WESTLAKE VILLAGE,WEST HILLS, WOODLAND HILLS

FOR ALL INQUIRIES, CONTACT ANN K. CASTLE AT

[email protected] OR 805.341.2972

SHELLEY CHILTON, CSA, LRE, LVNHOSPICE, HOME HEALTH, SKILLED NURSINGFACILITY ADMINISTRATOR, ACCESS TLC HEALTHCARE, TLC HOME HOSPICE, ACCESS TLC HOMEHEALTH CARE

KATIE GREELEY, DCUNITED FAMILY CHIROPRACTICSPECIALIZING IN PEDIATRIC CHIROPRACTIC CARE

STEVEN GREENMAN, DDSSPECIALIZING IN ADVANCED COSMETIC, IMPLANT& SEDATION DENTISTRY, SNORING & SLEEP APNEA

HILDA MALDONADO, MDSPECIALIZING IN FUNCTIONAL MEDICINE, ANTI-AGING MEDICINE & HORMONE THERAPY

SHARON NORLING, MDBOARD CERTIFIED OB/GYN, HOLISTIC/INTEGRATIVEMEDICINE, MEDICAL ACUPUNCTURE, NUTRITION & FUNCTIONAL MEDICINE

DENISE NOYER-EREZ, LAC, FABORMLICENSED ACUPUNCTURISTSPECIALIZING IN WOMEN’S HEALTH

DANIEL SLATON, DVMWESTLAKE VILLAGE ANIMAL HOSPITAL

ALON STEINBERG, MD, FACCBOARD CERTIFIED CARDIOLOGIST

DAVID VILLARREAL, DDSCENTERS FOR HEALINGSPECIALIZING IN HOLISTIC DENTISTRY

The opinions expressed here are those of the individual writer and not necessarily those of the publishers or management of YHC Magazine. All rights reserved.Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is prohibited. Publication of the name or photo of any person or organization in YHC Magazine should not beconstrued as an indication of that person’s expressed opinion. Advertisers and their agencies assume responsibility and liability for the content of their advertisement inYHC Magazine. Photographers whose work is published in any advertising or editorial content within YHC Magazine agree to indemnify and save harmless the publishersfrom all liability, loss and expense due to a photographer’s failure to gain a model release. YHC Magazine is not responsible for loss of or damage to unsolicited manu-scripts, unsolicited artwork, or any other unsolicited material. Unsolicited material will not be returned. YHC Magazine’s liability in the event of an error is limited to aprinted correction. YHC Magazine does not assume liability for products or services advertised herein.

PRINTED IN U.S.A.

WWW.YHCMAGAZINE.COM

FOUNDER & PUBLISHERANN K. CASTLE

MEDICAL ADVISORY BOARD


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It’s no wonder. Laundry detergent labels are some of the most difficult to decipher, given their hiddeningredients. And since many are known biohaz-ards, replacing this single item will go a long way toward reducing your exposure to carcino-gens, not to mention protecting our rivers,streams and oceans.

Search no more because we found the most natu-ral USDA-certified organic detergent and fabricsoftener possible—combined. It’s made from theshell of a berry. It’s commonly called soap nuts.

Women have used soap nuts to clean their laun-dry by hand at the river for generations because itreally works. The saponin in the shells, which iswhat forms the soapy lather, is also antimicrobial,antifungal, odor-reducing and gentle.

Dried soap nut shells can be used in your washer,but better yet, soap nuts now come in liquid form.This handy liquid can also be used to clean coun-ters, appliances, floors, carpets (in your steamcleaner or for spot removal), glass, windows, win-dow sills and more. It cuts grease better thanother products and it’s extremely concentrated.

WHO SAID IT WAS MORE EXPENSIVE TO GO NATURAL?

One load of laundry cleanedwith liquid soap nuts costsonly 18.8 cents compared tomore than 27 cents whenusing conventional brands.If you use fabric softener along with your tradi-tional detergent, your cost per load averages 37cents. You save 25 percent with soap nuts if youtypically use laundry detergent by itself, and yousave 49 percent if you use fabric softener. In otherwords, your cost is more than double if you uselaundry detergent plus fabric softener. No fabricsoftener is needed with soap nuts, which leavesyour clothes really soft.

Soap nutshells as theywould nor-mally be usedin the laundry.

All three liquid soap nuts productsare certified USDA-organic and GreenDot award winners.

OTHER USES FOR SOAP NUTS

In addition to all the uses above, the natural soap nutsberry has also been adapted for use as a natural sham-poo and as Alta dish washing liquid, a soap for dish-washers, for hand washing dishes and for garmentsrequiring hand washing.

Based on direct comparisons, its cleaning power is supe-rior to the natural, vegetable-based liquid soaps whichhave grown in popularity. Next time you need to getlaundry or dish detergent, household cleaning solutionsor shampoo, try the line of EXTREME 18X liquid soapnut products found at http://bit.ly/liquidsoapnuts.

chemical-free

By Jan Tucker


LINDA READ-SHELBY, LAcLicensed Acupuncturist

VIVEKA S. RUCKER, LAcLicensed Acupuncturist

A C ENTER FOR ACUPUNCTUR IN THIS TIME WHEN REALITY DOCTOR SHOWS ARE SO POPULAR, IT’SCLEAR PEOPLE ARE HUNGRY FOR KNOWLEDGE ABOUT HOW TO TAKECARE OF THEIR BODIES. “They want a safe, natural approach to heal theirconditions,” said Linda Read-Shelby, LAc. “However, medicine, whetherWestern or Eastern, is not one size fits all.”

CONNECTION


E, COMMUNITY AND HEALING

Linda is the cofounder of The Healing Compass Acupuncture WellnessClinic & The Qi Center along with Viveka S. Rucker, LAc. They are bothCalifornia-licensed acupuncturists with master’s degrees in traditionalChinese medicine.

“It’s important to come to a professional licensed person to get safe andpersonalized care that treats your individual needs,” Viveka said.

“People are bombarded from all sides with a preponderance of informa-tion about acupuncture and natural health care, nutrition, what foodsare good to eat, vitamins, herbs, supplements,” Linda said. “We provide asafe, comfortable place where patients get their questions answered,and their misconceptions addressed in a non-judgmental fashion.”

Range of ServicesThe center offers complete Chinese medicine general health care, includ-ing acupuncture, Chinese herbal therapy, personalized nutritional evalu-ation and whole food nutritional supplementation, customized dietarytherapy, meditation, qigong, yoga, and tai chi healing exercise.Additional services include massage and bodywork, hypnotherapy,women’s health care, male and female fertility treatment, food allergytesting, saliva hormone testing, cosmetic acupuncture and microcurrenttreatment, lifestyle counseling, wellness education, and classes andworkshops.

“Acupuncture is the most well known and requested service in Chinesemedicine,” Linda said. “Within the past six months we computerized ourpersonalized nutritional evaluations which have been very popular asthey show and prioritize for each person exactly which particular bodysystems are in need of support.”

Inspired to GrowThe Healing Compass & Qi Center was inspired after Linda and Vivekaspent eight years in private practices. “We both felt the limitations of oursmaller offices and the ability to provide all the services we wanted forour patients,” Linda said. “As colleagues and friends for many years wemet to discuss what we wanted to achieve with our work.”

Viveka wanted a space large enough to accommodate her practice andalso offer qigong and other Chinese medicine wellness classes. Linda wasready to expand her practice and had a desire to offer Kundalini yoga.

“Earlier in our careers we’d shared asmall space so we knew we couldwork well together,” Viveka said.“Little did we know what the futurewould hold.”

The center, opened in January of2011, started with their Chinesemedicine practices and oneKundalini meditation class in asmall reception room. “That classstarted to grow,” Linda said.“Students and patients were askingfor more classes and services so wesaw the need and desire from thecommunity.”

In the spring of 2012, Linda andViveka took on additional spaceadjoining their clinic in order tohave a dedicated studio for classesand a small boutique. “Our center isa work in progress and a collabora-tion of our and our patrons’ visionfor how we can best be of service,”Viveka said.

A Special Place“We created the phrase, ‘Discover apath that leads you back to you,’ toreflect our intention to support thewhole person on their path to heal-ing,” said Linda. “Everything is inter-connected,” added Viveka, “thebody, mind, spirit, environment andlifestyle are all involved. The pathto healing is not a straight line, butone that curves over hills and val-leys along the way,” she said.

B Y A L I C I A D O Y L E / / P H O T O G R A P H Y B Y M A R Y M Y E R S

continued >>

T H E H E A L I N G C O M P A S S & Q I C E N T E R


“While our medical services are thecore of our practice, we so enjoyworking with people and witnessingthe shift that happens as they discov-er the results of placing a priority onthemselves and their health,” Vivekasaid. “The true value of this is beingpresent and showing up for them-selves,” said Linda, “Truly it is thiswonderful energy of patients, teach-ers, students and others we work withwho make the center the specialplace it is.”

The center hosts each patient like aguest in a private home. “The healingprocess begins the minute you enterour serene atmosphere with freshflowers, soft lighting, peaceful musicand a warm greeting,” said Linda, “andwe’re regularly told that the tea weserve after each treatment or class isone of the most loved things we do.”

“The calming and harmonious aes-thetic of our center is an integral partof the healing experience,” saidViveka. “Studies have shown that envi-ronment has a profound effect onmood and body functioning.”

Power of Chinese MedicineChinese medicine excels in providinganti-aging and longevity-promotingcare. “The centurian population has

grown more than 60 percent in thelast three decades and more than 80percent are female,” Viveka explained.“Many of our patients want to lessenthe effects of aging for a better qualityof life and fewer medical expensesdown the line.”

The aging process is inevitable, Lindasaid. “Yet, the good news is that howwe age, look and feel is somethingeach of us can powerfully influence.Treating yourself properly in all facetsof life will naturally promote greathealth and a long life. Chinese medi-cine provides a proven path for heal-ing and aging with vitality.”

FeesPeople have many options for anacupuncture treatment. “Our goal is tohelp them decide what type of carethey want by explaining the differ-ence between acupuncture as a tech-nical service, and the system ofChinese medicine which is multi-faceted,” Viveka said.

“Our desire to provide patients withthe true benefits of Chinese medicineis why we work with all of its tools,”Linda said. “We also provide wellnesseducation as part of our practicethrough classes and workshops. Ourgoal is to promote the best outcome forour patients, not just a temporary fix.”

The center serves patients of all ages,but generally treats people in their30s and up. Patients typically seek nat-ural care options for chronic diseases,eczema and other skin disorders, aswell as anti-aging and cosmetic treat-ments. Other patients need help withfertility and reproductive systemissues, blood sugar management,weight management, dependence onpharmaceutical medications, oncolo-

gy support, and pain management forwhich acupuncture is best known.

“We provide primary care for thosewho use Chinese medicine as theirmain health care modality, referring toother health professionals whenappropriate or necessary,” Viveka said.

The Goal“The ultimate goal for our center,patients and students is the same goalwe have for ourselves—we want tofeel good physically, feel good aboutourselves, live fully, experience joyand be present in our lives,” Vivekasaid. “We want that for our communi-ty, our world and everyone who walksthrough our doors. We strive to pro-vide a place for guidance and supportas you heal through our medicine andpersonally discover ways to achievethese things for yourself.”

“Chinese medicine is primarily a pre-ventive form of health care,” Linda fur-ther emphasized. “It makes usstronger so we can avoid diseaserather than starting to deal with itafter it happens.”

“It’s not one system over the other, it’susing both systems appropriately andoften in combination,” Linda said. “Wework with Western medical doctorsand other health care professionals toprovide personalized care for patientsand their very individual situations.”

The Healing Compass AcupunctureClinic & The Qi Center is located at22440 Clarendon St., Suite 101, inWoodland Hills. Call 818.591.8600 or visit www.healingcompass-qicenter.com.

A C ENTER FOR ACUPUNCTURE, COMMUNITY AND HEALING

The ultimate goal for ourcenter, patients and students isthe same goal we have for our-selves—we want to feel goodphysically, feel good about our-selves, live fully, experience joyand be present in our lives...”

“

CONNECTION T H E H E A L I N G C O M P A S S & Q I C E N T E R


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Holistic/Biological DentistryHelping the

“The U.S. Environmental ProtectionAgency (EPA) reports there is more than1,000 tons of mercury in the mouth ofAmericans, which is more than half of allthe mercury being used in the U.S. today.”

planet and you

SPECIAL HEALTH BULLETIN


AVERY HIGH PERCENTAGE OF DENTISTSAROUND THE WORLD STILL ROUTINELY USEDENTAL AMALGAM AS A FILLING MATERIALTO REPAIR DECAYED TEETH. I’m surprised the pub-lic is not aware that these so called silver fillings actuallyconsist of 45 to 55 percent metallic mercury.

The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) reportsthere is more than 1,000 tons of mercury in the mouth ofAmericans, which is more than half of all the mercurybeing used in the U.S. today. They also identified that den-tistry accounts for 14 percent of the U.S. domestic usage ofmercury annually.

How do these fillings pollute our environment?

Wastewater from Dental OfficesIn 2003, according to the EPA, dental offices were found tohave been the source of 50 percent of all mercury pollutionentering publicly-owned treatment works. Wastewatertreatment facilities are designed to process human waste,not heavy metals. The mercury from dental discharges isseparated out into sludge, or biosolids. These are usuallyincinerated or used as fertilizer, with the mercury contentagain being directly emitted into the environment.

By Dr. David Villarreal

D I S P O S I N G O F M E R C U R Y

In a recent study morethan 67 millionAmericans 2 years andolder exceed the intakeof mercury vapor consid-ered safe by the U.S. EPAdue to the presence ofdental amalgam fillings.”

Holistic/biologic dental practices use specific amalgam sep-arators. These separators can successfully reduce theamount of mercury discharge in wastewater from dentaloffices and are essential in stopping mercury from enteringthe environment.

This does not, however, solve additional burdens placed byamalgam (silver) fillings on the environment and humanhealth. I have been a longtime supporter of SurfriderFoundation, whose mission is “the protection and enjoy-ment of oceans, waves and beaches through a powerfulactivist network.” We need more of these types of founda-tions for the survival of our planet.

Human WasteStudies show the average person with amalgam fillingsexcretes approximately 0.1 mg of mercury per day in his orher feces. This amounts to more than eight tons of mercuryin the U.S. alone per year eventually going into our sewers,streams, lakes and oceans.

CremationCremation of bodies with amalgam fillings adds to air emis-sions and deposition onto land and waterways. In 1991, cre-mation of 320,372 bodies added an estimated 2,800 poundsof mercury into the atmosphere in the United States.

Mercury VaporMercury vapor generated by the placement and removal ofamalgam fillings was found in a clinical study to be muchhigher than permissible by EPA standards. The study con-cluded dental professionals are totally ignorant of the occu-pational and environmental dangers associated with theuse of dental amalgam. They receive no education or train-ing regarding this issue.

There is a lot to consider when removing and disposing ofmercury fillings. Our office has mercury vapor ionizers posi-tioned to pass over the patient’s face and through the com-mon breathing space between patient, dentist and assis-tant. The mercury vapor emanating from the oral cavity isattached by the negative ion flow and carried to a positive-ly-charged collector plate mounted on the wall near thepatient’s feet. This collector plate is then cleaned with analcohol wipe and safely disposed as a biohazard waste.


continued >>

“

��

Denise Noyer-Erez, L.Ac. & AssociatesFellow, American Board of Oriental Reproductive Medicine

www.IneedleU.com

Support a healthy pregnancy • Induce and ease labor • Reduce stress

Increase your chances of having a baby withAcupuncture & Oriental Medicine

1220 LaVenta Dr, Suite 205AWestlake Village, CA 91361(805) 497-2625

15503 Ventura Blvd, Suite 200Encino, CA 91436

(818) 774-9844


We are concerned that no one in theoperatory or in our office breathes thesehazardous vapors when removing amal-gam (silver) fillings. Mercury vapor isreleased in greater quantities as a resultof drilling. We follow very strict removalprotocols because unsafe removal cancause more mercury-related health prob-lems to patients and dental personnel.

A Ban on Dental Mercury is the Answer

In a recent study more than 67 millionAmericans 2 years and older exceed theintake of mercury vapor considered safeby the U.S. EPA due to the presence ofdental amalgam fillings. More than 122million Americans exceed the intake ofmercury vapor considered safe by theCalifornia EPA due to these fillings.

Research has already begun to explorehow the mercury in amalgam and itsvapor can be altered into methlymercury(commonly accepted to be the most toxicform of mercury) within the human body.Bacteria in soil and water can convertmercury into methlymercury, which inti-mately impacts human health as well asmaritime environments.

We are starting to see some type of inter-national timeline forming to hasten theban of dental mercury which would savepeople and the environment, but wemust each do our part, not just for our-selves but our families and our planet!

Erik Solheim, Norway’s Minister ofEnvironment and Development, in 2007described the solution clearly, “Mercuryis among the most dangerous environ-mental toxins. Satisfactory alternatives tomercury in products are available and itis therefore fitting to introduce a ban.”

Dr. David Villarreal is aholistic, biological dentist andis co-owner of Centers ForHealing located at 1000Newbury Road, suite 225 inNewbury Park, CA, phone:805.375.2233. He is also theowner and formulator of

Estrella Natural Dental Products. He is an avid surferand local native of Southern California.

SPECIAL HEALTH BULLETIN

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Board Certi2ed Biological DentistsBoard Certi2ed Biological Dentists

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Dr. Blanche Grube DMDPresident of International

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Call for a FREEMercury Vapor TestCall for a FREEMercury Vapor Test

Specializing in:• Holistic & Sedation Dentistry• Laser Dentistry• Ozone Treatment• Biocompatibility Testing• Mercury Free• Heavy Metal FreeAll surgery done on premises

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Dr. David Villarreal DDSOwner and Formulator of

EstrellaNatural Oral Care Products

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Every Second Thursday of the Month!Please email us at [email protected] reserve your seat!

FREEEDUCATIONAL TALKSFREEEDUCATIONAL TALKS

for Your Comfort and HealthOrganic Mattresses CRIB MATTRESSES ARE THE FIRST INVEST-

MENT INTO YOUR CHILD’S HEALTH ANDdevelopment, especially when you consider theyspend 75 percent of their first four years on it, accord-ing to Sharon Cook, the founder of a mattress storethat specializes in organic products.

“We use manufacturers located in California, carry20-year warranties and use Certified Organic materi-als,” explained Cook, the owner of Snoozzz Mattress,located at 2920 E. Thousand Oaks Blvd. in ThousandOaks, California.

By Alicia Doyle

HEALTH VIEW 1 O R G A N I C M A T T R E S S E S


“A study done by theAmerican Academy ofPediatrics found thatphthalates causemore damage tobabies than adultsbecause their bodiesare still developing.”

Organic mattresses are made withorganic and non-toxic materialsinstead of conventional and chemicallyquestionable materials. Parents andphysicians recommend organic mat-tresses as a way to avoid unnecessaryexposure to these chemicals.

“An Organic mattress has three simpleingredients: Organic Cotton, OrganicWool and Natural Latex,” Cookexplained. “They are naturally antimi-crobial, hypo-allergenic, dust-mite andbed-bug resistant and do not containharmful off-gassing chemicals.”

Snoozzz Mattress specializes inContemporary and OrganicMattresses, Foundations, OrganicBedding, Pillows and Accessories,Power-Lift Chairs and Recliners,Handmade Wood Beds and CustomUpholstered Beds.

The inviting showroom features prod-ucts that are carefully handpickedfrom independent, family-owned man-ufacturers and suppliers with a multi-decade history of quality, reliability,innovation, integrity and value.

“Organic mattresses offer superb sup-port and comfort, are made of only nat-ural materials, are completely hypoal-lergenic and antimicrobial, and willlast upwards of 20 years,” Cook said.“Today most cribs convert into a youthsize bed which translates into morebang for your buck and less waste andimpact on the environment.”

On the flipside, non-organic crib mattresses contain fire retardantsprays that may contain toxic chemi-cals, phthalates, BPA and/or PVCwhich has been linked to endocrinesystem disorders and possibly cancer,Cook warned.

“Babies are likely to consume moreharmful off-gasses because of theirhigher respiration rate,” Cook said. “A study done by the AmericanAcademy of Pediatrics found thatphthalates cause more damage tobabies than adults because their bod-ies are still developing.”

Research from Jim Sprott, a NewZealand scientist and chemist, states

that crib death iscaused by toxicgases, which canbe generated from ababy’s mattress.Chemical com-pounds containingphosphorus, arsenicand antimony havebeen added to mat-tresses as fire retar-dants and for otherpurposes since theearly 1950s. A fun-gus that commonlygrows in beddingcan interact withthese chemicals tocreate poisonousgases.

The FDA andConsumer ProductSafety Commissionhave also issuedgeneral warningsregarding the use ofphthalates and theirdangers to ourhealth.

According to the Natural ResourcesDefense Council, mattresses madefrom petroleum based chemicals, suchas polyurethane foam, are highly flam-mable and require the addition offlame retardant chemicals to makethem flame resistant.

The council reports that in the past,the most commonly used flame retar-dants were polybrominated diphenylethers, which were banned in Europeand then in many states in Americaafter they were found to be accumulat-ing in blood and breast milk; they werealso found to interfere with thyroid hor-mone and thereby affect brain devel-opment.

The council further notes that mat-tresses made from natural materials,such as wool, must still meet flameresistant standards, but because thesematerials are more inherently flameresistant, they require the addition offewer chemicals. Therefore a mattressmade from “organic” materials isgrown without pesticides and is betterfor the environment.

When it comes to babies, the densityof a mattress is also important, Cooksaid.

“If your baby rolls over while sleepingand the mattress is too soft, they donot have the strength to lift their headsup and can suffocate,” Cook said.“Babies and toddlers require a firmermattress to assist in development ofstrong bones and correct posture.”

The cost of a standard CertifiedOrganic crib mattress, measuring 28-by-52-by-6 inches, over 365 days is less than 75 cents per day, Cook fur-ther emphasized.

“This cost covers organic materials,optimal durability, first-rate comfortand support. Could you, or your baby,afford any less?”

For more information call 805-379-2400 or visitwww.snoozzzmattress.com.

“


...a mattress made from "organic" materials is grownwithout pesticides and is better for the environment.

“

Bully or Wimp?


HEALTH VIEW 2 B U L L Y V . W I M P

AS A HUSBAND, DO YOU EVERFEEL LIKE YOU’RE BETWEEN AROCK AND a hard place, forced to decidebetween the lesser of two evils—damned ifyou do and damned if you don’t? If so, youhaven’t considered all of your options.

When we’re challenged or pressured, feelinganxious or worried about pleasing, we tendto tighten up physically, restricting the bloodflow to our brains and causing us to makeless than ideal choices. This is where manyhusbands find themselves when a conflictdevelops, or when they’re feeling powerless,frustrated or angry with their wives.

It’s while in this debilitating state that menbelieve their only options are to eitherbully—getting what they want despite thecollateral damage—or wimp out—walkaway with their tail between their legs andtheir resentment intact.

We don’t need to make that poor choice. Weshould never have to choose between beinga bully or a wimp. The solution is in learningthat you have the ability to be a confidentand caring husband in all situations.

Call it Like it IsYou may not want to admit to being a bully.It’s an ugly word. But you are being a bullywhen you’re relentless, coercive, insisting onbeing right, intent on changing her mind,threatening, withholding, badgering, intimi-dating, yelling, manipulating, and, of course,being physical in any way.

You’re a wimp when you’re afraid of disap-proval, conflict, differences of opinion or ofher tone or expression. You’re being a wimpwhen you’re not in your power, not confi-dent, not compassionate, not loving, notclear about what’s right and wrong and notwilling to take a stand.

Do These Examples Seem Familiar?Ben is in one of the men’s groups I facilitate.Ben thought he had a great marriage. Hiswife of five years, Lisa, felt differently. Shewanted me to know what had been going on

—Striking the Husbandly BalanceWayne M. Levine

“You’re a wimpwhen you’re afraid ofdisapproval, conflict,differences of opin-ion or of her tone orexpression. “

in their house—perhaps information Ben wasn’t revealing to the menin his group. They came in for some couples work.

Ben’s got a big personality, a very opinionated, A-type sort of guy.Lisa is smart and confident but quiet. The louder he gets, the softershe gets. When he has a point to make, he won’t quit until sheagrees. Lisa acquiesces because she knows Ben won’t quit.

At these moments, Lisa doesn’t feel heard, loved or secure. She feelsbullied. She’s tried to tell him but he can’t hear it from her. I madesure he heard it from me, and it started to sink in. Ben was just doingwhat he had seen his dad do to his mom, though he had vowed tonever be like his dad!

George, a coaching client, is not an A-type personality. He’s an engi-neer. He’s brilliant and emotionally disconnected. Like so many men,he lives in his head and would have a difficult time recognizing a realemotion. He’s afraid of his wife Paula and of intimacy. He’s so afraidof the possibility of her rejection, he hasn’t brought romance to hismarriage in years. Sex? Fugetaboutit.

Over the years, George had convinced himself that Paula just wasn’tinterested in him romantically. And then he went on to convince him-self that an affair would be the most logical way to proceed. This isthe kind of dialogue that takes place in the heads of these smart guyswhen they rely solely on their own counsel.

Because of his fear, neither he nor his wife had been getting whatthey needed from their relationship.

Although it took quite some time, George began to participate fully inhis own life, and brought sex and romance back into his marriage.

Why Does This Happen?You’re only a bully or wimp when you’re afraid. But when you’re inyour power, when you’re coming from a confident and loving place,you’ll always find there’s a better option. Perhaps you won’t be ableto resolve the issue in that moment. But you’ll know you’re capable ofaddressing the issue later when you’ve had a chance to think aboutit, calm down or ask for help.

Because of fear, neither Ben nor George had ever truly consideredtheir options. They couldn’t. All they knew was what they had experi-enced in their parents’ dysfunctional homes.

But with help, they were able to safely confront themselves, their painand their past. Once they did, better options began to reveal them-selves. Then they were able to make some serious and wonderfulchanges to become better husbands and better examples for their kids.

At the end of the day, it’s not about striking a balance between beingthe bully or the wimp. It’s about having the courage to become aconfident, loving, fearless and compassionate husband.

Wayne M. Levine is the director of BetterMen Coaching inAgoura Hills. He teaches men to be the best men, fathers, andhusbands they can be through individual, couples and groupcoaching, both in the office and via phone. Wayne is also authorof the best-selling book, Hold On to Your N.U.T.s—TheRelationship Manual for Men. Find out more and get a copy ofWayne’s book at www.BetterMenCoaching.com.



Expand Your Reach intoNatureBy Jan Tucker

BEYOND GREEN LIVING N A T U R E

“Slowing down andpracticing awarenesscan help us to deter-mine how we want torelate to what we’reseeing and doing.”


continued >>

LIVING A NATURAL LIFE IS SOMETHINGMANY OF US ASPIRE TO BUT OTHERS REJECTAFTER BEING EXPOSED TO THE SAME INFOR-MATION—the abundance of media messages about cli-mate change, the importance of sustainability, the emer-gence of green products on our shelves, and all the thingswe know and need to know about how going againstnature is damaging to our future existence.

We’ve all seen so much information on this subject that itcan be hard to understand what natural living is. Thegood news is, it’s possible to keep things simple—and thepurpose of this new column is to help you live a naturallife simply—so you can enjoy it.

Where to Begin?I brainstormed dozens of ideas related to natural livingand since I am a yogi living a yoga lifestyle—the spiritualyoga rather than the physical yoga—my list is quiteextensive. It is based on the yoga principles I hold dear(the first one being to simplify, by the way).

That said, the concepts I will introduce in this continuingcolumn are not unique to yoga. During the past 23 yearsof my spiritual journey I have always embraced a conceptI was compelled to include from the very start—I place ahigh value on the similarities in all the world’s religionsand among all people.

In my mind, this is one of the first natural concepts. Weall live on the same planet, sharing the same land andoceans with each other and with the plant and animalkingdoms. We have common needs, we share commonproblems, and to focus on anything but our commonground seems very unnatural. In fact focusing on our dif-ferences has led to major world problems.

Creating a peaceful world where we live and work togeth-er in harmony, respecting all people, is a natural conceptthat results from this perspective on life. We don’t all haveto agree, and we will never all achieve everything wewant at the same time. But living naturally is about hav-ing compassion for and honoring all living beings. It’sabout creating a better world where we can all improveour lives through each other’s mutual support. It’s aboutliving by the truth. Isn’t that a great vision?

Other Key Concepts of Living NaturallyOur world is so very complex and so are our lives. Multipleresponsibilities pull at us from all directions. We keep ourown stress levels so high that our health is affected. Atthis point what do we do?—we keep going! That’s not thebest answer.

Living naturally is about returning to the basics and sim-plifying—about slowing down to enjoy life more—it’sabout going within to reflect on what is really important.

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Realizing needs and wants are two dif-ferent things and then prioritizing the listgoes a long way toward settling us into amore natural lifestyle. We can do this.The key is to realize the need to do thisbefore we create more harm.

We have lost our connection withnature—specifically, with the naturalworld outside our homes and offices.Some of us even live surrounded bybuildings and asphalt with perhaps afew trees lining the sidewalks and apark or two. Connecting more closelywith nature helps our soul to connectwith its source.

If you’ve been indoors even for a shorttime and you go for a hike in the woods or on the beach—anywhere out-doors—you can feel your body and mindhealing from the contact. You can feelyour mind and your soul expanding andyour body wanting to slow down to takeit all in. We need our contact with natureand we can take even simple steps toget it. Developing an awareness of thiswill help make sure we strengthen ourconnection.

We can adopt practices to help us livemore naturally. Regular exercise andmeditation come to mind. Even a fewminutes each day is a great start if we’vebeen pushing too hard. We need quiettime to slow down and unwind, and atother times to process what we’ve expe-rienced on the outside before we take in more.

Slowing down and practicing awarenesscan help us to determine how we wantto relate to what we’re seeing and doing.Exercise, of course, keeps us in bettercondition and if we combine it with atrip outdoors the benefits multiply.

What about our health? There are a mul-titude of ways to care for our health froma proactive, preventive stance ratherthan waiting until we have a symptomand taking steps to fix it. From the foodwe eat to the amount of sleep we get toour general outlook on life—there are

We need our contact withnature and we can take evensimple steps to get it.Developing an awareness ofthis will help make sure westrengthen our connection.”

“BEYOND GREEN LIVING N A T U R E

It’s in the bag!Mark your calendars…starting July 1st manygrocery stores in the Los Angeles area willcharge 10 cents per grocery bag if you forgetto bring your own.

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many natural ways to achieve betterhealth. YHC Magazine already coversthis topic so thoroughly.

Then there are the plethora of chemicalsour bodies deal with in our environ-ment—both inside and outside of ourhomes. It’s known as the body burden.But we have control over the productswe choose to use, including personalcare products and cosmetics; food;clothing and furniture; household clean-ers, solutions, and equipment; paintsand pesticides; lawn and garden prod-ucts; and even items for our pets. If wepurchase these items consciously, wecan replace most of the chemical-ladenproducts with truly green natural onesand live a whole different kind ofhealthy natural life.

So much of returning to nature can bebased on learning from knowledgegained in the past. We have thousands of years of tested worldwide wisdomfrom which to draw. Certainly the devel-opment of technology is based on pastdiscoveries and experience. Technologyisn’t the only area where we can benefitfrom past knowledge. We can developnatural processes, products and reme-dies based on past knowledge, too.

As individuals and as nations we need to open our hearts and minds to thisancient wisdom, to the wisdom of ourolder generations both alive and longgone, in order to draw on their knowl-edge and practices rather than reinvent-ing the wheel.

In many cases the wheel has alreadybeen invented. It’s much wiser to learnfrom mistakes that have already beenmade and corrected than to make thesame mistakes over when trying torecreate the wheel. Let’s look back anduse the knowledge of our ancestors andour older generations to help us livemore naturally. We can truly thrive if wemake this a commitment.

Each month I will provide helpful infor-mation about how to create your ownnatural life—together we’ll improve theworld.

Jan Tucker is founder of White Lotus Living, Inc.,whose vision is all about positive thinking, return-ing to basics, tuning in with nature, unifying theworld with compassion, and through all these prin-ciples—ultimately—world transformation. It’sabout truth. www.whitelotusliving.com is also aplace for consumers to learn about and gain accessto truly green, natural products.


Autoimmune Disease Gluten SensitivityandDO YOU HAVE AN AUTOIMMUNE DIS-EASE (AD), A CHRONIC ILLNESS ORUNRESOLVED CONDITIONS? You may havegluten sensitivity or intestinal permeability.Intestinal permeability can lead to gluten sen-sitivity and gluten sensitivity can lead to intes-tinal permeability.

By Dr. Sharon Norling

NATURAL APPROACH G L U T E N S E N S I T I V I T I E S P A R T 1

“AD is one of the top10 leading causes ofdeath in female chil-dren and women in allage groups up to 64years of age.”

Gluten sensitivity can develop antibodieswhich create tissue autoimmunity and hasbeen shown to create autoimmune diseases.Perhaps you have been tested for gluten andthe test came back negative. Often conven-tional labs are not comprehensive enough andreport false negatives. New comprehensivespecialty labs can now diagnose gluten sensi-tivity with much more accuracy.

According to the American AutoimmuneRelated Disease Association (AARDA), one outof 12 men and one out of 9 women have AD.The statistics represent cases of actual AD.

Through laboratory testing and research weknow that autoimmune disease can exist inthe early silent stage with positive antibodiesbut without any significant loss of self-tissue.Identifying the cause of the inflammation andtreating it can help prevent serious illnesses.

What Is Gluten All About?We hear so much about gluten today. Whynow? The problem is related to our food andlifestyle! Our foods have been genetically mod-ified, hybridized and processed. We are alsoexposed to more toxins, pollutants, anddemanding lifestyle schedules.

Gluten is a protein found in many grainswhich is sticky, gives elasticity to dough andmakes food products chewy. Most people iden-tify breads and pasta as sources of gluten.When they avoid these, they may think theyare gluten-free but in truth, gluten is almosteverywhere.

There are no requirements for gluten-containing food productsto be labeled as such.

Gluten is found in ketchup, beer, alcohol, bran, imitationseafood, chewing gum, soy sauce, commercial salad dressing,sauces, salsa, artificial food colorings, canned vegetables,horseradish sauces, instant hot drinks (coffee, tea, hot choco-late), rice syrup, soups (both canned and frozen), bouilloncubes, MSG, sausages, food stabilizers and the list goes on.

In addition to wheat, other grains such as spelt, kamut, barleyand oats contain gluten. Other foods can cross-react withgluten causing our body to react.

Gluten may also be found in some cosmetics, hair products,other dermatological preparations and envelope glue.

What Should You Do?If you have been diagnosed with gluten sensitivity, I highlyrecommend you seek support and information from a nutrition-ist who can guide you through the maze of the gluten food ter-ritory. The risk of continuing to be ill, developing severe brainand body dysfunction or getting an autoimmune disease is notworth guessing what items contain gluten.

A person may have gluten sensitivity and not have celiac dis-ease. Celiac disease is defined as a genetic disorder with HLA-DQ2 or HLA-DQ8 (two major celiac disease genes) and glutenintolerance affecting one in 133 people.

Many people have severe reactions to gluten but do not havethe gene variation. The classic symptoms of celiac includediarrhea, weight loss, bloating and malnutrition. If a personwith the disorder continues to use gluten, they increase theirrisk of gastrointestinal cancer by 40 to 100 times that of thenormal population.

An individual can have gluten sensitivity and not have gas-trointestinal symptoms or enteropathy. A recent article inLancet Neurology (2010) reported gluten sensitivity can not beassociated with celiac disease or intestinal destruction but cancause harm to the brain and nervous system leading to diverseneurological malfunction.

About Autoimmune DiseasesOur immune system protects us from invasion by infections,abnormal cells and foreign substances. However, it can mal-function and autoimmunity is the result.

Gluten sensitivity can cause tissue autoimmunity in the brain,thyroid, pancreas, cardiac, joints, liver, skin, adrenals andstomach. The antibodies can be diagnosed using specific spe-cialty labs such as Cyrex Laboratories (www.cyrexlabs.com).The longer the person with gluten sensitivity continues to eatgluten the more likely they are to develop other ADs. The needto avoid gluten is not an option.

Autoimmunity is progressive. First, people lose tolerance totheir own tissue and elevated antibodies can be detected.Then destruction occurs that causes subtle symptoms but notenough to be diagnosed as AD. Finally, the tissue destructionis significant enough to cause loss of function. At this point,labs and imaging detect changes and AD is diagnosed. Theearlier the diagnosis and the earlier the intervention the betterthe outcome.


continued >>

If a person with thedisorder continues touse gluten, theyincrease their riskof gastrointestinalcancer by 40 to 100times that of thenormal population.

“

“


According to AARDA, “The NationalInstitutes of Health (NIH) estimates23.5 million Americans suffer fromAD and the prevalence is rising. Incomparison, cancer affects up to 9million and heart disease up to 22million. Researchers have identified80 to 100 different ADs. These dis-eases are chronic and can be life-threatening. AD is one of the top 10leading causes of death in femalechildren and women in all age groupsup to 64 years of age.”

Further, “Commonly used immuno-suppressive drugs lead to devastat-ing, long-term side effects. Accordingto the Department of Health andHuman Services’ office of Women’sHealth, autoimmune disease and dis-orders ranked number one in a top 10list of the most popular health topicsrequested by callers to the NationalWomen’s Health Information Center.”

Common ADs include:

• Hashimotos thyroiditis• Diabetes• Lupus (SLE)• Rheumatoid arthritis• Multiple sclerosis• Sjogren’s syndrome• Myasthenia gravis• Scleroderma• Autoimmune hepatitis• Antiphospholipid syndrome

Tips for PreventionAD is complex but there are somethings you can do to help prevent itand keep the symptoms from recur-ring. First, avoid or remove the trig-gers. Monitor your antibody testing.Importantly, avoid excess stress,physical overtraining, insomnia, lowblood sugar, gluten, infections, andtoxic relationships.

A lifestyle that includes laughing,loving and appreciation is the bestprescription. Enjoy a positive attitude,some exercise, good sleep, stable

blood sugar, hormonal balance andhealthy social interactions.

All these help to decrease inflamma-tion which supports a healthyimmune system. Use appropriatesupplement support and considerglutathione, an antioxidant which iscritical for a healthy immune systemas indicated by recent research.

Get tested for gluten sensitivityusing Cyrex Labs or another special-ty lab. The conventional routine labsoften report false negatives. If youare positive for gluten sensitivityhave a lab test that tests cross reac-tivity so you are not using othergrains as a substitute such a quinoaor millet if you are reactive to them,too. Importantly, also test for specificautoimmune antibodies before youdevelop serious health conditionsand full-blown ADs. Don’t overlookthis and don’t be overlooked. There isa root cause to your symptoms. Theanswer is first in the testing andthen avoiding gluten.

Dr. Sharon Norlingbrings a lifetime of education, training andpassion in both conven-tional and natural medi-cine. Using specializedtesting she finds theroot cause of symptoms

and illnesses and uses effective natural medi-cine whenever possible. For more informationon these topics please see her book, YourDoctor Is Wrong. Her practice is in WestlakeVillage. 818.707.9355.

NOTE: Dr. Norling has no financial interests inCyrex labs.

Dr. Norling will be presenting Gluten 1 on March 5th and Gluten 2 on March 19th at 6:30 pm RSVP at

www.drsharonnorling.com.

NATURAL APPROACH G L U T E N S E N S I T I V I T I E S P A R T 1

Intestinal Permeability

Gluten Sensitivity andGluten Cross-Reactive Foods

Autoimmunity

ENVIRONMENT T H E R E F I L L S H O P P E


“Making littletweaks” is the key tosuccessfully changinglifestyle habits.

THE REFILL SHOP OPENED ITSDOORS IN 2010 AND HAS BEENMAKING A DIFFERENCE ON ACOMMUNAL AND GLOBAL LEVELEVER SINCE. Michelle Stevens’ brilliantidea for a greener world has been beautiful-ly executed with taste and style. Her con-cept is simple; the everyday products youuse from cleaning to body and hair care,you can refill vs. purchasing new productand packaging every time you run out. You can bring your own pre-cleaned bottleto the store or you can choose one of themany varieties offered to begin your re-filling journey.

When you visit The Refill Shoppe you are infor a treat. Artistically displayed eco-friend-ly products can be found around the storeincluding ways to green your eating habitswith bento boxes, tiffins, “snack dittys” andalternatives to plastic zip baggies. Many ofthe products offered are only found onlineso its great to be able to see and touchbefore you decide to make a purchase.There are also colorful varieties of canteensand re-fillable water bottles as an alterna-tive to plastic.

Michelle and I talked about how her envi-ronmental awareness evolved. She said thatgrowing up on a boat had an impact on her,not just the alternative lifestyle part of itbut the connection to the water andwildlife. A big motivational factor andinspiration for her business is her love forthe Earth. She feels a deep concern for thelevels of pollution going on in our worldtoday but was quick to say that she neveruses any guilt-based tactics to lure peopleinto the store. Michelle feels that “Makinglittle tweaks” is the key to successfullychanging lifestyle habits.

The best thing about her concept of refillingis that it is fun! Michelle and her staff canhelp you find delicious blends of scentsfrom an abundant list of essential oils andfragrances. You can also get boosters addedsuch as Aloe Vera for extra moisturizing.Some of the essential oils include Jasmine,Cedar Wood, and Chamomile just to name a few.

The Refill Shop is more than just a retail store; it contributesto a more connected community. I asked Michelle what thefuture holds and she replied that she plans to open morestores in cities that would embrace the concept. Not only providing them with an earth-friendly consumer alternativebut to create little hubs of energy and like-minded people toconnect, share ideas and make new friends.

You can visit the Refill Shoppe at its new location 313 E. Main St. on the sunny side of the street in DowntownVentura. For a complete list of products, services, essentialoils and fragrances visit therefillshoppe.com.

Bianca Rose Martinez is an artist, public speaker andauthor of the book Compassionate Eating: A guide toConscious Consumption for Mind, Body Spirit & Planet.She also teaches organic vegan cooking classes inVentura. For free recipes, class schedules and otherservices, visit www.compassionateating.com.

Saving the Planet Can be Fun!The Refill Shoppe


By Bianca Martinez // Photos by Jeff Sloane

Do You Know That Your Partner is a

Reflection of You?MANY PEOPLE TALK ABOUT THEIRPARTNERS AS THOUGH THEY ARELESS THAN THEMSELVES IN SOMECORE WAY. This is the primary reason thedivorce rate is so high, since only unequalssplit apart. In support of this unequal perspec-tive, many people present a picture of theirrelationships as being essentially an accident,like their coming together was a total mysteryto them and everyone else.

Some also claim that they are the essence ofintimacy and just happened to end up with anintimacy cripple. Others are very preoccupiedwith the differences between the sexes, asdescribed by John Gray in Men are from Marsand Women are from Venus, in which womenare seen as being into intimate relationshipsand men are only into tasks and sports.

Have you ever looked at a couple and thought,“Why are they together? They seem so differ-ent.” You were probably viewing some superfi-cial quality and missed seeing that they aretogether because they are the same. The dif-ferences were just a façade.

By Bruce Derman, PhD


MIND & SPIRIT R E F L E C T I O N O F Y O U

Only people whoview their partners asunequal at a corelevel divorce. Coupleswith a mutual per-spective hardly everdivorce.

The Truth About RelationshipsIn my work, I consider all conclusions aboutpartners being so different as myths that dis-tort a true understanding of intimate relation-ships. Despite all the variations in personalitystyles among couples, I want to share with youeven if you don’t want to hear it—you can onlybe with your match.

The partner you are looking at across the tableis merely a reflection of your relationshipnature—no more, no less—or you wouldn’thave the energy to sustain any involvement. Ifyou are only open to experiencing fear to amoderate degree, then you will only matchwith people who are at that level.

This is true regardless if you are dealing withbrief relationships, unavailable people, or highdrama individuals. Eckhart Tolle, the author ofStillness Speaks and The Power of Now states,“Ultimately…there is no other, and you arealways meeting yourself.”

So, if you keep having relationships with alco-holic men who need rescuing, it is because youare not ready for more than a little boy, sinceyou are in truth a little girl who wears a care-taker disguise. If you keep having relationshipswith narcissistic women who dump on you, itis because you are a little boy who doesn’tthink he deserves better. These relationshipsare not wrong or even unsuccessful; they aremerely statements of who you are and who youare open to meeting.

Very few of us have an interest in you, espe-cially if you have been together for severalyears, have the same capacity for intimacy andshare the same level of emotional developmentas you.

In my opinion, if you were truly different inyour emotional capacity you wouldn’t betogether and would display what I call lovingdisinterest. There would be no fighting, debat-ing or arguing—just no interest.

This view is difficult for many to accept,because seeing your own limits is so exposingand revealing. Very few are willing to be thattransparent.

It’s more typical to make up a story about your-self and your partner so you can feel impressedwith yourself. After all, it sounds good to hearthat we could have a great relationship if itweren’t for the behavior of our date, wife, orcompanion. Rather than accept the humble-ness of seeing that you are no better than yourpartner and that they are merely a reflection ofyou, some spend enormous amounts of timeand energy proving that they are better or lessthan their partner.

If you are so convinced that you are better than your partner,you need to ask yourself why you are with them. Or why arethey hanging out with you since you devalue them or don’tlove them?

I call this verbal and emotional preoccupation, the differencegame, in my book, We’d Have a Great Relationship If It Weren’tfor You. In the difference game, any task, perspective, or activi-ty can be used to prove we are better or less than our partners:“I love you more; I am more sensitive and open; I am brighter; Ihave better judgment; or I am more successful.”

Switching to EqualityImagine if you dropped this ego attachment and no longer par-ticipated in this difference game. You would then have time tolisten, love, share, and be sexual much more than you haveknown in your relationship. Of course, you would no longer beable to use your partner to inflate or deflate yourself, and youwould be on very unfamiliar territory.

To see if you are ready for this, imagine saying:

“She loves me as much as I do her.”

“He is just as open as I am.”

“He is just as vulnerable as I am.”

“She is just as interested in me as I am in her.”

If you can make comments like this without hedging, then youare ready for an equal and mutual, intimate relationship withyour partner. However, if you hedge or justify in any way, thereis still room for you to continue playing the difference gameand maintaining a non-mutual attitude.

Being accountable for your relationship and giving up being avictim and clinging to justifications such as, “I am with himbecause there is no one better,” or “I am still here because ofthe children,” takes courage.

continued >>

Couples who can supportmutuality tend to make realagreements, not sloppy ones.A real agreement involvessaying “yes” on all four levels:mental, emotional, physi-cal, and spiritual.

“

“


There are two major characteristics ofa mutual relationship:

1. Real agreements–Coupleswho can support mutuality tendto make real agreements, notsloppy ones. A real agreementinvolves saying “yes” on all fourlevels: mental, emotional, physi-cal, and spiritual. While itrequires a greater commitment,these agreements stand up overtime and don’t need to be con-tinually repeated.

2. The We—A mutual relation-ship consists of three parts, incontrast to the presence of onlytwo in unequal relationships.These are your needs, your part-ner’s needs, and the needs of therelationship itself. Allowing forthe relationship to have its ownintegrity, called The We, helpscouples to be grounded, open,and respectful. From this per-spective the couple continuouslyapproaches conflict by askingwhat would best serve the cou-ple’s love and needs. When TheWe is present, shared statementstypically are brief, inclusive andnever contain put-downs.

Benefits of the Mutuality ApproachBy integrating the mutualityapproach into your relationship, thetwo of you will experience a softeningof your respective armors, as youleave behind your proving and defen-sive postures.

From this place you will regard theother as your equal at the core.Couples who learn to be with theirpartner with a mutual attitude haveconsiderably less desire to fight, putthe other down or be distant. Whenyou realize your partner is an equalreflection of you, there is no need toprotect yourself and the doors of trueintimacy are wide open.

Also, you will no longer be emotional-ly reactive to your partner, goingthrough the constant shift of movingcloser and moving away from eachother. In this common dance one ofyou moves toward the other and thenautomatically the other moves backand away.

At a certain point when the distancerstarts to feel anxious and insecure,they start to move forward until theycan feel secure again about theirpartner’s interest and then the gameshifts again.

The sad part of this repetitive danceis that the couple is never able toachieve any lasting closeness, since both partners see the other as a threat.

All this movement reactivity dissi-pates when the couple sees theirsameness in being equally afraid, aswell as in their desire to be close toeach other. When they can achievethat awareness they no longer needto protect themselves in this circularchase and can enjoy the stillness ofbeing close to their partner.

Something to Ponder Only people who view their partnersas unequal at a core level divorce.Couples with a mutual perspectivehardly ever divorce. Have you everheard anyone say, “He’s just as emotionally available and loving asme and I want to divorce him?” Ithink not.

In recognizing their mutual equality,a couple no longer needs to use theirdifferences to elevate or deflate them-selves. They can now accept andintegrate all their differences into therich tapestry of their intimate rela-tionship. The reflection they oncefeared is transformed into a powerfulpicture of their love.

Bruce Derman, PhDis a licensed clinical psy-chologist in private prac-tice for 44 years, withoffices in Woodland Hillsand Santa Monica. He isthe author of three booksincluding, We’d Have A

Great Relationship If It Weren’t For You. He isknown as the relationship doctor, since he spe-cializes in all stages of relationship from dating,to beginning a relationship, sustaining a rela-tionship and learning to divorce with dignity. Hewill appear on The Ben Show on Comedy Centralstarting February 28, playing himself. Visit hiswebsite www.therelationshipdoctor.net, [email protected], or call 818.375.7194


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Endometriosis?


ENDOMETRIOSIS AFFECTS 5.5 MIL-LION WOMEN AND GIRLS IN THE U.S.In most cases this can be a very painful repro-ductive and immunological disease in whichthe endometrium, the uterine lining, moves out-side the uterus and implants in other areas ofthe pelvic area.

Women affected by this disease often describetheir symptoms as “killer cramps.”Endometriosis affects 10 to 15 percent ofwomen from adolescence to post-menopause.

Identifying the Disease

Endometriosis tends to be accompanied by thefollowing common symptoms:

• Very painful periods.

• Painful ovulation.

• Heavy or irregular periods.

• Pain with intercourse, urination or bowel movements.

• Infertility.

The cause of endometriosis is not clear, but ithas been strongly linked to immune system dys-function and exposure to dioxins and other toxicchemicals that accumulate in the fat stores offish, animals and people.

By Denise Noyer-Erez, L.Ac. FABORM

Important to Find Out

Serious Cramps or

EAST~WEST E N D O M E T R I O S I S

“For some womenwith mild symptoms,doctors may suggesttaking over-the-counter medicationsfor pain.”

continued >>

A Variety of TreatmentsTreatment of endometriosis can be mild to aggressive depend-ing on the person’s symptoms, goals and age. For example,some women may want to manage their pain while others areconcerned about preserving their fertility. The treatment forwomen who plan to have a baby may differ greatly from treat-ment for those whose main complaint is pain.

Following are some of the treatments used for this disease.

Pain medication. For some women with mild symptoms, doc-tors may suggest taking over-the-counter medications forpain. These include ibuprofen (Advil and Motrin) or naproxen(Aleve). When these medicines don’t help, doctors may pre-scribe stronger pain relievers.

Hormone treatment. When pain medicine is not enough, doc-tors often recommend hormones. Hormone treatment is bestfor women with small growths who do not have bad pain.

Birth control pills may be prescribed to decrease the amountof menstrual flow and prevent overgrowth of the tissue thatlines the uterus. Once a woman stops taking the pill, shecan, of course, become pregnant. When stopping the pill, thesymptoms of endometriosis return.

GnRH agonists and antagonists greatly reduce the amount ofestrogen in a woman’s body, which stops the menstrualcycle. These drugs cause side effects similar to menopausesuch as hot flashes, bone loss and vaginal dryness. The diffi-culties with endometriosis may disappear for months withthese treatments.

Surgery is usually the best choice for women with severeendometriosis who have many growths, a great deal of painor fertility problems. Both minor and more complex surgeriescan help. Your doctor might suggest one of the following:

• Laparoscopy treatment can be used to diagnose and treat endometriosis. During this procedure, doctors remove growths and scar tissue or burn them away. The goal is to treat the endometriosis without harming the healthy tissue around it, and to relieve pain. If the endometriosis is interfering with attempts to become pregnant, often this procedure can correct this prob-lem as well.

• Laparotomy or major abdominal surgery involves a much larger cut in the abdomen than laparoscopy. This allows the doctor to reach and remove endometriosis growths in the pelvis or abdomen.

• Hysterectomy is a surgery in which the doctor removes the uterus and sometimes the ovaries. This is done when the endometriosis has severely damaged these organs and should only be considered as a last resort.


EAST~WEST E N D O M E T R I O S I S


Holistic TreatmentsBecause endometriosis symptoms recurwhen medical treatment stops, manywomen have found other therapies to bevery helpful in alleviating symptoms,such as acupuncture, herbal remedies,aromatherapy, dietary modifications,vitamin supplements and relaxationtechniques.

Research shows acupuncture is veryeffective in helping women and girlswith this condition by significantlyreducing pain, decreasing inflammationand regulating the menstrual cycle.

One study published in the EuropeanJournal of Obstetrics & Gynecology andReproductive Biology, November 2010(Epub August 2010) confirmed that 86percent of the women in the study hadconsiderable results within 10 acupunc-ture treatments.

Dietary changes are also very importantand necessary for someone with thiscondition. The first priority is to minimizePCB and dioxin exposure and consump-tion at home and in the workplace. Athorough detox program along with ananti-inflammatory diet is recommendedto assist the body in decreasing theaccumulation of metabolic waste.

November 2010 (EpubAugust 2010) confirmed that86 percent of the women inthe study had considerableresults within 10 acupuncturetreatments.”

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Suggested dietary strategiesare to:

• Avoid red meat, as it contains arachiconic acid which increasesinflammation and pain.

• Increase green vegetables such as kale, Brussels sprouts and broccoli.

• Add spices having anti-inflam-matory properties such as turmeric, ginger and flaxseed.

• Avoid sugar, caffeine and alcohol.

• Minimize or avoid dairy products since they can increase inflam-mation and pain.

• Take supplements such as fish oil from an approved source (youneed to watch mercury levels).

As you can see from the variety ofapproaches, there is hope for patientswith endometriosis. Seek help from yourdoctor or qualified holistic practitioner ifyou have symptoms.

Denise Noyer-Erez, L.Ac.,FABORM Founder andPresident, DENISE NOYER-EREZ, L.Ac. & ASSOCIATESACUPUNCTURE & INTEGRATIVEMEDICINE

Licensed Acupuncturist, Denise Noyer-Erez, complet-ed her Master’s of Science and clinical internship inOriental Medicine at Emperor’s College in SantaMonica, California. She received further training inacupuncture at the International AcupunctureAcademy in Beijing, China. Prior to that, she hadstudied at Cal State University Northridge, focusing onexercise physiology. Denise is also board certified inOriental Reproductive Medicine, and a Director and aFellow of the American Board of OrientalReproductive Medicine.

Denise has also completed extensive postgraduatetraining in gynecology, as well as reproductive well-ness, including; fertility, support for IVF/IUI, pre andpostnatal care, menopause and pelvic pain.

Denise is Founder and Clinical Director of heracupuncture and integrative medical clinic, where she and her staff are devoted to the health and well-ness of their patients. Denise works closely with localdoctors, including obstetrician/gynecologists, repro-ductive endocrinologists, urologists and other physi-cians and specialists. She and her team are commit-ted to excellence and caring for each person individu-ally and compassionately.

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FROM THE HEART T H E T H R E A D S O F A W A K E N I N G


IN 1992, AFTER A FEW MONTHS ININDIA STUDYING BUDDHISM and liv-ing among Tibetans, Leslie Rinchen-Wongmo chose to formalize her commit-ment to the Buddhist path and was givena new name.

“Rinchen-Wongmo is my Tibetanname—it means Precious EmpoweredWoman,” she explained. “For Tibetans,names can change several times in alifetime. When great obstacles areencountered or significant changes takeplace in one’s life, it’s not uncommon toask a lama for a new name. This shows adeep respect for the power of words andan awareness of the fluidity of identity.”

Discovering Her PurposeHer name, Rinchen-Wongmo, was givenby Geshe Sonam Rinchen, the Tibetanlama with whom she took refuge in theBuddha’s inner path of freedom andwell-being. “Taking refuge in theBuddha, Dharma, and Sangha is, in lay-man’s terms, the formal act of becomingBuddhist,” she said.

For as long as she can remember, “I hadalways been drawn to an Eastern spiri-tual view. It simply felt natural to mefrom an early age, but I had no specificpractice.”

She had experienced TranscendentalMeditation, as well as seeing the DalaiLama in college during his first visit tothe United States. “When I met Tibetanculture on my first trip to Ladakh, I feltI’d found a family to add to my alreadywonderful family in the U.S.”

“Living among the Tibetans for nineyears, I was Rinchen-Wongmo,” she con-tinued. “I learned to make thangkas asRinchen-Wongmo.”

Today, Rinchen-Wongmo is known forher thangkas, a Tibetan word referringto sacred pictorial scrolls. For her, thisinvolves creating a particularly rare typeof thangka which renders sacredBuddhist images and portraits frompieces of silk stitched together by hand.

The BuddhasA maker and teacher of sacred textileart, Rinchen-Wongmo has creatednumerous thangkas including aMedicine Buddha, also known asHealing Buddha. “I was moved to makethis thangka as my mother enteredchemotherapy and many friends andloved ones encountered health problemsand loss.”

In Buddhism, the Buddha is oftenreferred to as a physician because heprescribes the treatment for overcomingthe disease of mental affliction.

“In that sense, all Buddhas are healingbuddhas,” Rinchen-Wongmo said. “Butthis particular form, deep blue in colorand holding a medicinal plant, is specif-ically associated with healing physical

ailments that can be obstructions tospiritual progress in this life or to thelongevity conducive to making the high-est use of this life.”

“The traditional images are supports formeditation and spiritual practice,” sheexplained. “They are rich in symbolismconnected with a philosophy and prac-tices aimed at waking up to our truenature, acting compassionately andending suffering.”

Evolving Her Skills and TeachingIn her apprenticeship, she learned tocreate these traditional images out ofsilk, and she continues to create themon commission. “But now, I also use thesame techniques to create portraits ofreal people, incorporating various meth-ods of photo printing and machine quilt-ing. Up to now these portraits havebeen of people in the HimalayanBuddhist world because that’s whatcontinues to inspire me. Their sincerity,hardiness, and closeness to the earth’srhythms move me.”

Her teaching program, the StitchingBuddhas Virtual Apprentice Program, isnow the focus of her energies.

“I teach spiritually-oriented, fabric-loving women the skills I learned inapprenticeship to Tibetan masters along with modifications and adapta-tions I’ve learned through my own experience,” she explained. “In a six-month course conducted through theInternet, they learn the fundamentals of Tibetan appliqué and produce theirown silk lotus.”

Many students then choose to continueinto a self-paced practice stage inwhich they apply their nascent skills toprojects of increasing intricacy. “Mymost advanced students are now begin-ning to make their own thangkas afterthree or four years of practice and grad-ual adoption of new skills,” Rinchen-Wongmo said.

Growing up, she was always visual. “I took painting classes as a child. Idesigned puppets and stage sets andput on puppet shows for the neighbor-hood kids as an even younger child. Icreated scrapbooks of family vacationsbefore scrapbooking was popular ordefined. I was also the class and thespian historian, creating scrapbooksfor those groups, and made posters forevents and campaigns in school.”

In college, she studied environmentaldesign, which led to a graduate degreein urban planning and managementand work in housing and communitydevelopment.

“I had intended to get an architecturedegree but had back troubles. I realizedI wouldn’t be able to take the longhours over a drafting table andswitched courses,” Rinchen-Wongmosaid.

In the same time period, she was learn-ing to quilt and loving it. “That, too, wasderailed by my bulging spinal discs. Sofor a decade, I was doing other thingsuntil, while serving as an economicdevelopment volunteer for the Tibetansin India, I saw my first silk thangka inproduction. I fell in love with the colors,the fabrics, the texture, and the connec-tion with my spiritual path. I just had tostart stitching again.”

Shortly afterward, she entered a full-timetraditional apprenticeship with a Tibetanmaster. “Working alongside several youngTibetan women who didn’t speak anyEnglish, day in and day out for four years,I learned to stitch like the Tibetans doand create these vibrant—both in colorand energy—sacred images.”

Her Work has MeaningFor Rinchen-Wongmo, this style of art isa merging of her spiritual study andpractice, combined with her playful joyand creativity.

“I love that the images I create with myhands have helped many very specialpeople to become free of suffering and toteach others about their true nature,”she said. “I love being connected withthem through these images and throughthis sacred creative practice. And I hopethat in my small way, I can open peo-ple’s hearts with my work, that I canprovide some stimulus or inspiration fortheir awakening.”

“Students tell me this work makes themmore attentive and aware, and that thisawareness spreads to other areas oftheir lives,” Rinchen-Wongmo said.“They say that it’s calming and center-ing, but also enlivening and delightful.They notice their own patterns come upin the face of the fabric and thread. Thework is more challenging than theyexpect. There’s a deep sense of satisfac-tion in the creation.”

For more information on the teachingprogram, visit www.stitchingbuddhas.com

To see more of Rinchen-Wongmo’s artand sign up for Weekly Wake-Ups, visitwww.threadsofawakening.com.

Threads of Awakening—Buddhism in Art

By Alicia Doyle

We owe it to ourselves to keep this livingheritage alive. Not only will this help usappreciate our own history, it will providesecurity knowing future generations willhave access to safe, healthy food and theability to touch the life-giving essence of the earth.

McGrath Family Farm is located on WestVentura Boulevard just off of the CentralAvenue exit. The country store, where youcan purchase some of the tastiest, freshestproduce you’ve ever had, is open daily from9 to 6. McGrath Farm also sells organic pro-duce at farmers markets in Santa Monica,Camarillo, Topanga Canyon, Hollywood,Beverly Hills and Pasadena.

Next time you are driving down the 101allow yourself to experience the beauty and rich history McGrath Family Farm hasto offer (and pick up some inspiration fordinner too!)

For farmer’s market locations, CSA info,farm tours and more, visit www.mcgrathfamilyfarm.com.

Bianca Rose Martinez is anartist, public speaker and authorof the book CompassionateEating: A guide to ConsciousConsumption for Mind, Body Spirit& Planet. She also teaches organicvegan cooking classes in Ventura.For free recipes, class schedules

and other services, visit www.compassionateating.com.

WHILE DOING RESEARCH for my new book project, OrganicVentura, I had the pleasure of meeting several local, organic farm-ers in the County and visiting their beautiful farms.

This fertile patch of Southern California is blessed with some ofthe richest soil in the world, not to mention the incredible climate.In all my years of living here it was hard to believe I had not visit-ed McGrath Family Farm in Camarillo or fully appreciated the liv-ing heritage right here in our communal backyard.

Phil McGrath is a fourth generation farmer. His family’s farminglineage goes back to their great-grandfather who originally pur-chased the land back in 1868. Although the farm has been dividedand portions sold over the years, the essence has remained thesame—hard working people dedicated to producing wholesomefood while shunning harsh industrial practices that use pesticides,genetic modification, herbicides and other harmful chemicals.

McGrath stands alone as one of the only certified organic farms inVentura County. While surrounded by conventional farms in thefields and at Farm Bureau meetings, Phil has stayed true to hisbeliefs that farming can and should be done as sustainably aspossible. We had much in common with our shared passion forhealthy food and environmental awareness.

Good Reasons to Visit the FarmThe ability for McGrath’s family to continue to play this importantrole in our community hinges on the awareness and the willing-ness of people to make the conscious choices to support local,organic agriculture.

Conventional farming often does not look ahead regarding envi-ronmental or social consequences future generations will have toface. Most conventionally-grown produce is shipped out of theCounty and even out of the country and does not actually feed thelocal community. This system might be good commerce but is itsustainable long-term?


McGrath Family Farm

– A Living HeritageBy Bianca Rose Martinez

COMPASSIONATE EATING M c G R A T H F A M I L Y F A R M

“Phil has stayedtrue to his beliefsthat farming canand should be doneas sustainably aspossible.”

yhc magazine - march 2013

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