willow brook road - droppdf1.droppdf.com/.../qm97n/willow-brook-road-sherryl-woods.pdf · 2015. 10....
TRANSCRIPT
#1NewYorkTimesbestsellingauthorSherrylWoodssweepsreadersawaywiththestoryofabelovedmemberoftheO’Brienfamilyassheclaimsthelifeshe’salwaysdreamedof
Spirited,spontaneousCarrieWintershasgrownupunderthewatchfuleyesofnotonlyhergrandfatherMickO’Brien,buttheentiretownofChesapeakeShores.
Nowthatshe’shomefromEurope,aglamorousfashioncareerbehindherandherheartbroken,thereseemtobefartoomanypeoplewatchingtoseeifshe’llliveuptothe
expectationsherfamilyhasforher.
Asifthatweren’tenoughpressure,Carriefindsherselfdrawntosexy,grief-strickenSamWinslow,whoisyearningforsomeonetohelphimraisethenephewwho’sunexpectedlycomeintohislifeafteratragedy.
Withherownlifeinturmoil,
isCarriereallyreadytotakeonanewcareerandanewman?OrisSamexactlywhatsheneedstocreatethestrong,lovingfamilyshe’salwayswanted?
Praisefor#1NewYorkTimes
bestsellingauthorSherrylWoods
“SherrylWoodswritesemotionallysatisfyingnovelsaboutfamily,friendshipand
home.Trulyfeel-greatreads!”
—#1NewYorkTimesbestselling
authorDebbieMacomber
“LaunchingtheChesapeakeShoresseries,Woodscreates
anengrossing…familydrama.”
—PublishersWeeklyonTheInnatEaglePoint
“Sparksflyinalivelytalethatisoverflowingwith
familyconflictandwarmth
andthepossibilityofrekindledlove.”
—LibraryJournalonFlowersonMain
“Warm,complex,andsatisfying.”
—LibraryJournalonHarborLights
“Suretosatisfy.”
—PublishersWeeklyonAChesapeakeShoresChristmas
“Woods’samazinggraspofhumannatureandthe
emotionsthatliedeepwithinusmakethisstory
universal…thislatestnovelintheChesapeakeShoresseries
doesnotdisappoint.”—RTBookReviewsonDriftwood
Cottage
“Onceagain,Woods,withsuchauthenticity,weavesataleoftrueloveandthe
challengesthatcanknockupagainstthatlove.”
—RTBookReviewsonBeachLane
“Engagingandsatisfying…Asweet,affectingholiday-
themedread.”—KirkusReviewsonASeaside
Christmas
Alsoby#1NewYorkTimesbestsellingauthorSherryl
Woods
ChesapeakeShores
DogwoodHillTheChristmasBouquetASeasideChristmasTheSummerGarden
AnO’BrienFamilyChristmasBeachLane
MoonlightCoveDriftwoodCottageAChesapeakeShores
ChristmasHarborLightsFlowersonMain
TheInnatEaglePoint
TheSweetMagnolias
SwanPointWhereAzaleasBloom
CatchingFirefliesMidnightPromisesHoneysuckleSummerSweetTeaatSunriseHomeinCarolinaWelcometoSerenityFeelsLikeFamilyASliceofHeavenStealingHome
TheDevaneyBrothers
TheDevaneyBrothers:Daniel
TheDevaneyBrothers:MichaelandPatrickTheDevaneyBrothers:
RyanandSean
OceanBreeze
SeaGlassIslandWindChimePointSandCastleBay
RoseCottageSisters
ReturntoRoseCottageHomeatRoseCottage
TrinityHarbor
AlongCameTroubleAskAnyone
AboutThatMan
ForacompletelistofalltitlesbySherrylWoods,
visitwww.sherrylwoods.com.
Lookfor#1NewYorkTimesbestsellingauthorSherryl
Woods’sTheChristmasBouquet
availablesooninpaperbackfromMIRABooks
SHERRYLWOODS
WillowBrookRoad
DearFriends,
Iusuallyusethisspacetogiveyoualittlebackgroundonthestoryyou’reabouttoread.ThistimeIhopeyou’llindulgemeasIthanksomefolkswho’vemadeitpossibleformetowritethemany,manybooksyou’vereadthroughtheyears.
Almostfromthevery
beginningIhaveworkedwiththeverysavvyDeniseMarcil,whosededicationasmyagenthasmadeheranincrediblebusinesspartner.ShehadfaithwhenmineflaggedandacalminginfluencewhenIwasontheedgeofsomewritingcliff.Noonecouldhaveworkedharderormadethislongcareerasmuchfun.
I’vebeenblessedwithso
manyfabulouseditorsthroughtheyearsaswell,womenwho’vegentlynudgedmetocreatebetterandbetterstories.LuciaMacrostartedmycareerwithSilhouettewaybackinthe’80s.JoanGolanguidedmethroughliterallydozensofbooks.NowIhavetheabsolutepleasureofworkingwithMargaretO’NeillMarburyforthesecondtime.
I’mabetterwriterbecauseofthemandtoomanyotherstoname(therehavebeen140-plusbooks,afterall).
Onceabookispolishedtoperfection—orasneartothatasweeverget—it’sinthehandsofthepublisherandsalesteam.I’veworkedwithseveral,butnosalesforcecouldbemoredeterminedorenthusiasticthanthemenand
womenatHarlequin.Gettingthesebookswhereyoucanfindthemisatoughjob,andthey’retheverybestatit.Theyhavemyundyinggratitude!
TherearedozensofothersI’dliketothank,includingfamilyandfriends,butI’llusethislastlittlebitofspacetothankyou!Youremailsandlettersmeantheworldto
me.AndI’vealwaystriedtokeepyouinmindwitheverypageIwrite.Blessyouforthesupportandloveyou’veshown.
Allbestasalways,
Sherryl
Contents
Chapter1
Chapter2
Chapter3
Chapter4
Chapter5
Chapter6
Chapter7
Chapter8
Chapter9
Chapter10
Chapter11
Chapter12
Chapter13
Chapter14
Chapter15
Chapter16
Chapter17
Chapter18
Chapter19
Chapter20
Chapter21
Chapter22
Chapter23
Epilogue
ExcerptfromDogwoodHillbySherrylWoods
1
TheoriginalMickO’Brien–designedcottageonWillowBrookRoadhadbeenbuiltwithweatheredgrayshingles,whitetrimandatinybackporchbarelybigenoughfortworockerssidebyside.TheyfacedWillowBrook,
whichfedintotheChesapeakeBay.Thebackyardslopedgentlytothebrook,withthegracefulbranchesofatrademarkweepingwillowtouchingthelawnatthewater’sedge.Thepeacefulsettingwasjustrightforquietconversationorrelaxingwithagoodbook.Infrontthecottage
featuredasmallyardwithanactualwhitepicketfenceand
aclimbingyellowrosebushthattumbledoveritwithaprofusionoffragrantblooms.Brightredandhot-pinkgeraniumsfilledpotsonthestoopinavibrantdisplayofclashingcolors.Thepropertyoozedpicturesquecharm.Withthreecozybedrooms
andafireplaceinthelivingroomandasurprisinglylargeeat-inkitchen,itwastheperfectChesapeakeShores
vacationgetawayorastarterhomeforasmallfamily,butCarrieWintershadbeenlivingtherealoneandatlooseendsforalmostsixmonthsnow.Theonlypersonaltouchshe’daddedbeyondthemismatchedfurnitureshe’dacquiredfromvariousfamilyatticswastheportraitofthewholeO’BrienfamilytakenattheChristmasweddingofhertwin,Caitlyn.
Thesedays,sittinginoneofthoserockersformorethanaminuteortwomadeherantsy.Aftertwoyearsinapressure-cookerpublicrelationsjobatwhichshe’dexcelled,beingidlewasanewexperience,andoneshedidn’tparticularlylike.Shewastoodistractedforreadinganythingdeeperthanthelocalweeklynewspaper.Andthoughshelovedtocook,
makingfancymealsforonepersonjustleftherfeelinglonely.Worstofall,sheseemed
incapableofmotivatingherselftogetoutofthisfunkshe’dbeenineversincecominghome.ChesapeakeShoresmightbewhereshewanted—orevenneeded—tobeasshetriedtopieceherlifebacktogetherandreevaluateherpriorities,butit
hadcreateditsownsortofpressure.Whiletherestofthe
O’Brienclanwasunmistakablyworriedabouther,hergrandfatherMickwasborderingonfrantic.O’Briensdidnotwastetimeorwallowinself-pity,whichwasexactlywhatCarriehadbeendoingeversincethebreakupofherlastrelationship.Timedto
coincidewiththecrash-and-burndemolitionofhercareerinthefashionindustry,thecombinationhadsentherfleeingfromParisandstraightbacktoherlovingfamily.Carriesighedandtooka
firstsipoftheoneglassofwinesheallowedherselfattheendoftheday.Wallowingwasonething.Gettingtipsyallalonewas
somethingelseentirely.Evenshewaswiseenoughtoseethat.AnimageofMarc
Reynolds,thefashion-worldiconshe’dthoughtsheloved,creptintoherhead,asitdidaboutahundredtimesaday.Thatwasdownfromaboutamillionwhenshe’dfirstflownhomefromEuropeafterthebreakup.Ifitcouldevenbecalledthat,she
thoughtwryly.Truthfully,she’dfinallyrealizedthatMarcthoughtofhermoreasaconvenientbedpartnerandworkhorsewhosepublicrelationseffortsforhisfashionempirehadhelpedtoputitonthefasttracktointernationalacclaim.Unbeknownsttoher,hisheartapparentlybelongedtoashe-devil,self-absorbedmodelwhotreatedhimlikedirt.
Carriecouldrelate,sinceMarchadprettymuchdonethesametoher.Shewasstillstrugglingtounderstandhowherjudgmentcouldpossiblyhavebeensocloudedthatshehadn’tseenthatsooner.Surelythesignshadbeenthere.Hadshebeensobesottedshe’dmissedthem?Ifso,howcouldshepossiblytrustherinstinctsaboutamanagain?
Notthatshewasgoingtoletthatbeanissueanytimesoon.Shewasswearingoffthemaleofthespeciesuntilshefiguredoutwhoshewasandwhatshetrulywanted.Attherateshewasprogressingonthatfront,itcouldtakeyears.Enough!shetoldherself
firmly,carryingheralmost-fullglassinsideandsteppingoverascatteringoftoysas
shewent.Shesmiledasshepickedupafloppy-earedbunnyandsetitgentlyinachair.Astackofchildren’spicturebookssatonanearbytable.Takingcareofhertwin
sister’slittleboy,JacksonMcIlroy,wasabouttheonlythingthatgaveherasenseoffulfillmentthesedays.WithCaitlynservingamedicalinternshipatJohnsHopkins,
andCaitlyn’shusband,Noah,runninganincreasinglybusyfamilymedicinepracticehereintown,Carriehadvolunteeredforday-caredutywhenevertheyneededher.Moreandmoreoftenthey’dcometorelyonher,whichsuitedherjustfine,butseemedtobemakingeveryoneelseinherdrivenfamilyalittlecrazy.Babysittingwasn’t
consideredasuitablecareergoalforthegranddaughterofthetown’sfounder.Shepickedupafewmore
toys,puttheminthebrightlycoloredtoyboxshe’dpaintedherselfoneparticularlydrearywinterday,thengrabbedherpurseandwalkedintotown.TenminuteslatershewasatO’Brien’s,theIrishpubhersecondcousinLukehadopenedafewyearsback.She
knewshe’dfindagoodmealthere,evenifitcamewithaservingoffamilymeddlingfromwhicheverO’Brienhappenedtobearound.Whenshewalkedinthe
door,shewasstartledtofinditmostlyempty.“Hey,Carrie,”Lukesaid,
automaticallypouringaglassofwhitewineforher.“Whereiseverybody?”she
asked,asshesettledona
stoolinfrontofthemagnificentoldbarthatLukehadfoundinIrelandandshippedhometobethecenterpieceofhispub.“It’sbarelyfiveo’clock,”
hepointedout.“We’llbefillingupsoon.”Carrieglancedatherwatch
andgroaned.Today—adaywithoutthebabytowatch—hadbeenendless.Apparentlyitwasn’tclosetobeingover,
either.“CanIaskyoua
question?”shesaid,asLukepolishedglasswareandreadiedthebarforthisevening’sbusiness.Hestudiedherfacefora
moment,thencamearoundthebarandsatdownbesideher,givingherhisfullattention.“What’sonyourmind?”“Youweretheyoungestin
mymom’sgeneration,right?”“Oh,yeah,”heconfirmed.“Didyoufeelpressuredto
accomplishsomething?”Helaughed.“Areyou
kiddingme?”“Notevenalittlebit,”she
saidseriously.“Youknowallthis,butlet
meremindyou.BythetimeIfinishedcollege,yourmomwasafinancialsuccessstoryonWallStreet.Kevinhad
servedinthemilitary,thenjumpedontothebandwagontopreservethebaywithUncleThomas.ConnorwasahotshotdivorcelawyerinBaltimore.Breehadopenedasuccessfulflowershop,thenalocaltheater,whereshe’snowwritinganddirectingtocriticalacclaim.AndJesswasbarelyintohertwentiesandalreadyturningtheInnatEaglePointintoasuccessful
regionaldestination.”Heallowedthattosinkin,
thenadded,“That’swhatIwasupagainst.Ontopofthat,mybrotherstartedworkingwithUncleMickasanarchitectstraightoutofcollege,andmysisterisallbutrunningtherealestatebusinesshereintownwithmydad.O’Briensseemedtoknowwhattheywantedinthewomb,allofthemexcept
me.”“Andme,”Carrie
lamented.“Funnyhowyouweretheyoungestandfeltlost.CaitandIaretheoldestinourgeneration.Sherecognizedherdestinyevenbeforeshegotoutofhighschool.She’sdeterminedtobeadoctorandsavetheworld.Notevenmarriageandababyhavederailedherplans.”
Lukegrinned.“Andyourgoalsaren’tthatlofty?”“I’mnotsureIevenhave
goals,”sheadmitted.“IthoughtIdid.IenjoyedPRworkwellenough.Iwasgoodatit,too.AndIlikedbeinginthefashionindustry,butthatwasmoreaboutbeingwithMarcthanthework.Itdidn’tbreakmyheartwhenanotherjobinfashiondidn’tmaterializerightaway.
WorkingwithhimiswhatImissmost,sothatmustbetellingmesomething.”Lukestudiedherwitha
commiseratinglook.“Haveyoufiguredoutthemessage?”Sheshrugged.“Nope.AllI
knowisthatIhatebeingatlooseends.”“Whataboutthattripyou
tookwithUncleMicktoAfrica?Anyinspiration
there?”Hergrandparentshadgone
toAfricatocheckoutseveralvillagesindireneedofmedicalhelp,especiallysincetheoutbreakofEbolahadhadsuchadevastatingimpact.MickhadbeendraftedbyCaitandadoctorinBaltimoreintodesigningsmallmedicalfacilitiesforthevillagestoprovidethecaretheysodesperately
needed.Ithadbeenaneye-openingtripwithanidealisticmissionsheadmired.“Sure.Itmademerealize
howluckywe’veallbeen.I’vedonatedatonofmoneyfrommytrustfundtothecausebecauseI’veseenfirsthandhowworthwhileitis,butIdon’twanttoreturn,notthewayCait’schompingatthebittogo.ShewassoenviousthatIgottogowith
GrandpaMickandGrandmaMegan.Me?”Sheshookherhead.“Icouldhardlywaittogetbackhome.”“TheStates?”“NotjusttheStates,but
here,backinChesapeakeShores.IthoughtonceIgothereeverythingwouldmagicallybecomecleartome.”Lukegaveheralong,
consideringlook.“Haveyou
thoughtaboutstayinghere,Carrie?Reallythoughtaboutit?Ialwaysknewthistownwasrightforme.ItwasjustabouttheonlythingIdidknow,butyou’velivedinalotofexcitingcities—NewYork,Milan,Paris.AreyouabsolutelycertainChesapeakeShoresisbigenoughforyou?”Shefrownedatthe
question,whichseemedto
suggestashallownessshedidn’tappreciate.Shedidn’tneedglitzandglamour.Shereallydidn’t.She’dhadatasteofit.Thathadbeenenough.“Whatdoyoumean?”she
challenged.“Thisishomeforme,Luke,thesameasitisforyou.”“Ifyousayso,”hesaid,his
doubtsstillevident.“Idosayso.”
“YouwereborninNewYork,”heremindedher.“Youwenttocollegethere,too,andtraveledallovertheworldwhenyouwereworkinginfashion.I’veonlybeentoIreland,wherethingswereprettylaid-back,especiallyinthesmallervillages,butIimaginethelifestylehereisverydifferentfromtheglamorousplacesyou’veseeninFranceand
Italy.It’sdefinitelyaworldawayfromthehustleandbustleofNewYork.”Thoughherinstinctwasto
counterLuke’sobviousskepticismwithcompletecertainty,shetookasipofherwineandactuallygavethequestionsomethought.“Itisdifferent,butina
goodway,”sherepliedslowly,tryingtoputhergutfeelingsintowords.“The
paceisslower.Thevaluesaredifferent.Familyreallycountsforsomething.Momsawthat.SheleftNewYorkandbroughtmeandCaitlynbackhere.”“Becauseshewasinlove
withTrace,”Lukesaid.Carriesighed.“Yes,Trace
didplayabigpartinherdecision,butshe’sbeenhappybeinghome.She’dtellyouthat.She’sfiguredout
howtobalancethecareershelovesandthefamilyshelovesevenmore.”“Balanceisimportant,”
Lukeagreed,thengaveheranotherofhisannoyinglonglooks.“Whatdoyouenvisiondoingwithyourlifehere?Iknowtheambitiongenecan’tpossiblyhaveskippedoveryoucompletely.AllO’Brienshaveit.”“Notme,”sheadmittedas
ifitwereacrime.Lukewasrightaboutonething—O’Brienswereexpectedtobeexcellentmultitaskers,and,despiteherlastnamebeingWinters,shewasanO’Brienthroughandthrough.Lukehadbroughttheconversationfullcircle,rightbacktothosegoalsthatseemedtobeeludingher.She’dbeensoblastedluckyherentirelife.Whatrightdidshehaveto
complainaboutanunexpectedbumpintheroad?“AllIeverreallywanted
wastobeawifeandmom,”shetoldhercousin.Shemadetheadmissioninahushedvoice,asifitweresomesortofcrimetowantsolittleforherself.WhenLukedidn’treactas
ifshewerecrazy,shecontinued,“Gramwasmyrolemodel.Nellmadeareal
homeforMomandhersiblingsafterGrandpaMickandGrandmaMegansplitup.Ialwayssawmyselfdoingthatsamething—cooking,baking,nurturingmykids—righthere,surroundedbyfamily.AllthroughcollegeIkeptexpectingtomeetsomeoneandfallinlove.Ipracticallymadeacareeroutofdating.IthoughtforsureI’dgetamarriagelicense
fifteenminutesafterIpickedupmydiploma.”Shesighedagain.“That
wastheplan,butitneverhappened.ThenImetMarcandthoughthewastheone.Ofcourse,hewasthelastmanonearthwho’deverbehappyinasmalltown,soIhavenoideahowIexpectedhimtofitintomydream.”“Everheardof
compromise?”Lukeasked
withasmile.“FromMarc?Notlikely.”“Howaboutyou?”“Fortherightman,sure,”
shesaidglibly,thenwondered.“Okay,you’reright.Ican’tsettle.Itwouldneverwork.IwantwhatMomandTracehave,whatBreehaswithJakeandGrandpaMickhasfoundwithGrandmaMegannowthatthey’rebacktogether.Iwant
thewholehappily-ever-afterthing.”“Soyoucan’tsettleand
youclaimyoudon’tcareaboutacareer,”Lukesummedup.“Youhaveyourselfarealdilemma.”“Isn’tthatwhatI’vebeen
tryingtotellyou?”shesaidinfrustration.“Maybeyouneedtofocus,
picktheareaofyourlifethatmattersthemosttoyou,the
oneoverwhichyouhavesomecontrol.”Shesmiledatthat.
O’Briensdidlovetocontrolthings.Hergrandfatherwasamasteratthatandhe’dinstilledthatstubborn,we’re-capable-of-anythingstreakinallofthem.“We’vealreadyconcluded
thatIcan’tcontrolwhenoriftherightmanmightcomealong,andIhavenocareer
goals,atleastnotthekindI’mpassionateabout,”sheremindedhimyetagain.“Ithinkyou’remakingthis
toocomplicated,”Lukesuggested.“Stopfrettingaboutacareer,ifthat’snotwhatyoucareabout.Putitonthebackburner.Getoutthereandstartdating.Therearesinglemeninhereeverynightoftheweek.I’llfixyouup.Whenwasthelasttime
youwentonadate?Thepathtomarriagegenerallystartswithafirstdate.”“SoI’veheard,”shesaid,
thoughrandomdatingdidn’tappealtoher.She’ddonethatallthroughcollegetonoavail.Besides,she’dswornoffmenuntilshefiguredouthowshe’dbeensowrongaboutMarc,howshe’dmisjudgedhisvaluesandhisfeelings.
ButLukewasrightaboutonething.Shedidneedsomesortofsociallifebeforeshewentcompletelystir-crazy.“Howaboutthis?Idon’twanttobefixedup,butthenexttimeI’minhere,ifthere’saniceguyaround,introduceus.Womenandmencanbefriends,right?That’snotabadstartingpoint.”“Ihavemydoubtsabout
menandwomenbeingpals,butit’sdefinitelyastart,”Lukesaid.“Ipredictyou’llbemarriedinnotime,withahalfdozenkidsunderfoot.”Asalluringasthatimage
was,Carriecouldseethedownside.“CanyoupicturewhatGrandpaMickwillhavetosayaboutthat?Helovesallhisgrandchildrenandgreat-grandchildren,butheexpectsmorefromus.”
“Forgetyourgrandfather.Thisisaboutwhatyouwant.YouknowNellwillbeonyourside.”Carriesmiled.“Sureshe
will,butshe’llbestandingthereallalone.GrandpaMickwillbehorrified.Sowilljustabouteveryoneelse.EvenMomandTracewillthinkI’mwastingmypotential.”“Thisisaboutyou,
though,”Lukeargued.“And
aboutwhatwillmakeyouhappy.Whenitcomesdowntoit,Ithinkthat’swhattheytrulywantforallofus.Asappalledasmydadwasbytheideaofthispub,hegotonboardwhenhesawhowmuchitmeanttome.Treatthewholemarriagethingasifitwereajobhunt.Interviewapplicantsonadailybasis.”Carriegavehimachiding
look.“Yousaythatasifit’s
perfectlysimpletoplucktheperfectmanoutofthinairortoidentifyhimbygettinghimtoansweralistofquestions.Trustme,it’snot.Besides,where’sthemagicinthat?”Hercousinchuckled.“Ah,
soyouwantthemagic,too?”“Ofcourse.AnduntilI
findit,Ican’tverywellsitaroundanddonothing.Istillneedagoal.Beingidleisn’tallit’scrackeduptobe.I’m
notsuitedforthat,either.”Luke’sexpressionturned
thoughtful.Whileheponderedwhateverhewaspondering,Carriesippedherwine.“You’rebabysittingfor
halfthekidsinthefamily,aren’tyou?”hesaideventually.“Yes,butwhat’syour
point?That’snotexactlyajob.”
Hegaveheralonglook.“Makeitone.”Shefrownedatthe
seeminglyoffhandsuggestion,thoughitwasevidentLukewaswarmingtotheidea.“Whatdoyoumean?”shepressed.“Youlovekids.Youdon’t
haveanyofyourownontheimmediatehorizon.”Hestaredatherasifwillinghertoreachthesameconclusion
hehad.Whensheremainedsilent,headdedwithatouchofimpatience,“Consideropeningadaycare.”Carrieimmediatelywaved
offtheidea.“Comeon,Luke.Ican’tchargefamilyforkeepinganeyeontheirkids.”“Whynot?Ifyouweren’t
around,they’dbepayingsomebodyelse.Icertainlychargethemfortheirpintsofalewhentheycomeinhere.”
“Notthesamething,”sheinsisted.“Thisisabusiness.Weallunderstandthat.”Helaughed.“Andtheday
carecouldbeyourbusiness,”hesaid.“Justsomethingtothinkabout.Thetowncoulduseone.Moirawassayingthattomenottwenty-fourhoursago.Shesaidifwe’reevergoingtohavekids,givenourbusyschedulesandhertravelingwithher
photographyexhibits,we’llneedsomeonewetrusttocareforthem.Sheflatlyrefusestoputaplaypeninthecornerandseeourchildraisedinabar.”Carriecouldjustimagine
Moiramakingthatpointveryclear.FromherveryfirstintroductiontotheO’BriensinhernativeIreland,Moirahadneverhesitatedtoexpressanopinion.Ithadearnedher
thenicknameofMaddeningMoira,untilLukehadpleadedwithallofthemtodropit.Lukegaveheragrin.
“Maybewhenyou’retotallyfocusedonstartingabusinessforyourself,therightmanwillsuddenlyappear.Bythenyoumaybesobusy,youwon’tevenhavetimeforhim.”“Thewayyouwerewhen
Moiracamealong?”shesaid,recallinghowhe’dexpectedMoiratositbypatientlywhilehegotthepubupandrunning.She’dtakenexceptiontothat.“Exactly,”headmitted
withagrimace.“Moiratriedtogetsomesensethroughmyhardhead,butitwasNellwhofinallysetmestraightaboutwaiting.”“How?Ineverheardthe
story.”“AfterGramfellillduring
thetripsheandDillontooktoNewYork,shecalledMoiraandmeintoherroomatthehospitalandtoldustostopwastingtime.Sheremindedusthatweshouldneverputoffthethingsinlifethatreallymatter,thatthere’sneveraperfecttimeforfallinginlove.Iswear,evenlyingthereinthathospital
bedlookingsoblastedtinyandfrail,shewasaforcetobereckonedwith.”“Shestillis,”Carriesaid,
thenadmitted,“Itscaresmetothinkwhatwillhappenwhenweloseher.She’sthebedrockofthisfamily.”“Andtohearhertellit,
she’snotgoinganywheretillshe’ssatisfiedwe’reallsettledandcontent,”Lukereplied.“Withawholeslew
ofgreat-grandchildrenaroundnow,Ithinkshe’splanningonbeingwithusforawhile.”“Ihopeso,”Carriesaid
softly.Lukepattedhershoulderas
hestoodup.“Ineedtogetbacktowork.JustthinkaboutwhatIsaid.Maybedaycareistherightfitforyou,maybenot,butyouwon’tknowuntilyou’veexploredthepossibility,thesameasI
figuredoutapubwastherightfitformethefirsttimeIwalkedintooneinIrelandandrealizeditcouldbetheheartofacommunity.Ifoundmytruecallingonthattrip.”“AndMoira,”shesaid,
smiling.“AndMoira,”heagreed.Afterhe’dgoneintothe
kitchentocheckinwithhischef,Carriesighed.WasthereanymerittoLuke’s
idea?Orwoulditfeelasifshewasgivinguponherowndreamofhavingafamilybysurroundingherselfwithotherpeople’schildren?Shewasagreatbabysitter,aterrificaunt,buttherewasawholelotmoretorunningadaycare,includingmoreregulationsthanshe’deverhadtodealwith.Ofcourse,shehadtakenacoupleofearlychildhooddevelopment
andchildpsychologyclassesinschool.She’dbeenfascinatedbythetopicsandshe’dacedthem.Shemightevenhavepursuedmoreclassesbackthen,ifshehadn’tgottenaPRinternshipandgravitatedinthatdirection.Shethoughtofallthe
O’Brienkidswhowereunderfootonaregularbasisandsmiled.Theywerethe
bestpartofherlife,noquestionaboutthat.Couldsheturnthatintoacareer?JustasLukehadsuggested,
itwassomethingworthconsidering.Shecertainlydidn’thaveanalternativeinmindandsheneededtodosomethingbeforeherfamilylostpatienceandshelosthermindwrestlingwithallthisindecisiveness.
***
Samglancedintherearviewmirrorandsawthathisnephewhadfinallyfallenasleep.Hebreathedasighofrelief.Hewasn’tsurewhichwasworse,thelongsilenceswhenBobbysaidnothingatallorthestringofunanswerablequestionsthathadbeenthrownatSameversincehissisterandbrother-
in-lawhadbeenkilledinanaccidenttwoweeksearlier.ThediscoverythatBobbywasbeingplacedinhiscarehadshockedhimintosilence,forsure.Itwaslittlewonderithadleftthesix-year-oldthoroughlyconfused.Andnow,heretheywere
drivingintoChesapeakeShores,atownwhereSamhadn’tevenhadtimetogethimselfsettledbefore
learningaboutthetragedythathadtakenBobby’sparents.He’dlefthisnewjobasagrievingbrother,hisonlythoughtsfocusedongettingthroughthefuneral.Nowhewasreturningasasingleparentwithsomanythoughtsandfearsswirlinginhishead,hehadnoideawhichneededtobetackledfirst.He’dputhisowngriefonthebackburnersohecouldstay
focusedonthescaredlittleboysuddenlyinhiscare.“Dinner,”hemuttered
underhisbreath.WheneverBobbyawakened,he’dbestarving.TheonethingSamdidknowwasthathecouldn’tgoonfeedingtheboynothingbutfastfood,theonlythingthatseemedtotemptBobbytoeat.FortunatelyfastfoodwasinshortsupplyinChesapeakeShores,which
didn’thaveachainrestaurantintown.TheclosestMcDonald’sorBurgerKingwasmilesaway.Insteadofheadingstraight
totheInnatEaglePoint,wherehe’dbeenstayingsincehisarrivalintown,SamturnedontoShoreRoadandfoundaparkingspotacrossfromseverallocalrestaurants,includingO’Brien’s,apubthatspecializedintraditional
Irishcomfortfood.Wasn’tthatexactlywhatheandBobbybothneeded?Somethingcomfortingandfilling?Exitingthecar,he
hesitated.DidhehavetowakeBobbyjustsohecouldrunin,ordersomefoodandrunbackacrossthestreet?Itwasearlyenoughthatthestreetwasmostlydeserted.Theshopshadclosed,sofew
touristswerelingeringalongthewaterfront,anditwastooearlyformostpeopletobeheadingoutfordinner.Anditwas,afterall,ChesapeakeShores,atownwithoutanysignificantcrimeexceptfortheoccasionalhighschoolprank.EvenasSamopenedthe
backdoorofthecar,hecouldhearBobby’ssoftsnores.Theboylookedsopeaceful;it
seemedashametowakehim.Convincinghimselfhisnephewwouldneverbeoutofsight,hejoggedacrossthestreetandwentinside,grabbingamenuoffthebar,thenmovingbacktothedoorwaywhileheglancedthroughtheofferings.Irishstewwastheday’sspecial.Thatsoundedhealthyandfilling.Andhowlongcoulditpossiblytaketodishitintoa
containersoSamcouldbeonhisway?Afteronemoreglanceto
reassurehimselfthatBobbyhadn’tawakened,hereturnedtothebar,onlytofindnoonetheretotakehisorder.Infact,theonlypersonintheplacewasayoungwoman,herexpressionglumasshestaredintoaglassofwineshe’dbarelytouched.“What’samanhavetodo
togetsomeserviceinhere?”heaskedirritably.Thewoman’sresponding
frownwaslikelyjustified,butSamcouldn’tworryabouttheimpressionhemightbemaking.Hehadachildoutsideandwaytoomuchonhismind.“Sorry,”shesaidinacool,
politetone.“Mycousinhadtogoinbacktospeaktothechef.He’llberightout,I’m
sure.”“Youdon’tworkhere?”“No,butifyou’reina
hurry,IcangetLuke.”Samnodded.“Please.Or
canyoujusttellhimI’dliketwoordersoftheIrishstewtogo?”Hehesitated.“Doyouthinkasix-year-oldwouldlikethat?”Herexpressionbrightened.
“Sure.It’sgreat.Allthekidsinourfamilyloveit.I’llgive
Lukeyourorder.He’llfixyourightup.”Samcouldn’thelpnoticing
thesexyhighheelsshewaswearingwhensheslidoffherbarstool.Thoseshoesdrewattentiontolong,shapelylegs.Hedidn’tknowalotaboutfashion,buthehadafeelingshehadn’tboughtthematthediscountstoreoutonthemainhighway.Infact,herentireoutfit,ascasualas
itwas,seemedtoshoutthatithadcomefromadesigner,notofftherack.Arichtourist,perhaps,thoughshedidseemtobetotallycomfortableinhere.Andhadn’tshereferredtotheownerorthebartenderashercousin?Samdidn’thavetimetotry
toputthepuzzlepiecestogether.Hesureasheckdidn’thavetimetoallowhis
curiositytobestirredbyabeautifulwoman.Hislifehadrecentlygottenmorecomplicatedthanhecouldeverhaveimagined.Rightnow,heneededtogethisfoodandgetbacktoBobby.Oncemore,hewentback
tothedoorandglancedacrossthestreet.TherewasnosignthatBobbywasstirringandnobodywasstandingbesidethecar
lookingalarmedthatachildhadbeenleftaloneinside.Thatdidn’tmeanSamcouldbegoneformuchlonger.ThelastthinghewantedwasforBobbytoawaken,findhimselfaloneandpanic.Pacingimpatiently,hewas
startledwhenthewomanappearedathisside,obviouslyonherwayout.“Yourfood’sontheway,”
shesaidassheopenedthe
door.Alightfloralscentthat
remindedhimofsummernightswasleftinherwakeasshepassedhim,thenheadedacrossthestreet.Samsawtheexactmoment
whenshespottedBobby.Shestoppedbesidethecar,didadoubletake,thenturnedbacktogiveSamalookthatcouldhavemeltedsteel.Shewhirledaroundonthosespike
heelsofhersandmarchedstraightbackinhisdirection.Thepub’sdoorslammed
openandshestoodbeforehim.“That’syourcar?”Samnodded,aflush
crawlinguphisface.“Youleftyoursoninthe
carallalone?Whatwereyouthinking?”shedemandedindignantly.“Thismaybeasafetown,butnoplaceis100
percentsafe.Plusitcangethotinsideinpracticallynotime,especiallyonasunnydaylikethis.”Eventhoughheknewshe
wasprobablyjustifiedinherindignation,Samstaredherdown.“Whyisthisyour
business?”“Becauseinnocentchildren
needtobeprotectedfromirresponsibleparents.”
“I’mnothisparent,”Samretorted,thoughnotonlywasthatnotentirelytrue,heknewitwasalsohardlythepoint.He’dbeenaparentforaboutananosecond.Hewasstillgettingthehangofit.“He’smynephew.”Sinceherharshstaredidn’t
waveratthat,hefoundhimselfexplaining.“Hisparentsdiedinanaccidenttwoweeksago.I’mjust
bringinghimheretolivewithme.You’llhavetoforgivemeifIthoughtlettinghimfinallygetsomerestwasmoreimportantthandragginghimoverheretowaitwithmewhileIgetsomefood.Hewasneveroutofmysight,washe?Andthewindowsareallcracked,sothere’saircirculating.Didn’tyouseemestandingrightherebythedoorkeepinganeyeonhim?”
“Isuppose,”shesaid,backingdown,butsparksstillflashedinhereyes.“Youcan’ttakechanceswithachild’ssafety.Thingscanhappenintheblinkofaneye.”“I’mwellawareofthat,
probablymoresothanyouare,”hesaid.“That’swhathappenedtomysisterandbrother-in-law.Theyweregoneintheblinkofaneye.
Nobodycouldhaveanticipatedthat.AndIsureasheckdidn’tanticipatebecomingadadovernight.”Shefalteredatthat,her
cheeksturningpink.“I’msorry.Look,justgobacktothecar,okay?I’llbringyourfoodoutassoonasit’sready.It’llmakeusbothfeelbetterifhe’snotovertherealone.”Samstartedtoargue,then
gavein.Hepulledacoupleof
twentiesfromhiswalletandgavethemtoher.“I’mnotsurehowmuchthebillwillbe,butthisshouldcoverit.”Shehandedbackoneofthe
twenties.“Thiswilldo.I’mgoingtohaveLukeputsomechocolate-chipcookiesinwithyourorder.They’renotonthemenu,buthekeepsthemonhandforthekidsinourfamily.They’remygreat-grandmother’srecipe.She
bakesonceaweekandbringsthemoverhere.Sheleavesasupplyatmyhouse,too,sincemostofthekidsareinandoutofthere,too.”Thethoughtofhome-
bakedcookiestriggeredalonginginSam,onehehadn’tevenrealizedhe’dburieddeepinside.“Mygrandmotherusedtodothesamething.Shebakedforthewholefamily.She’sbeen
goneforyears,butIstillrememberthewayherkitchensmelled.”Asmilespreadacrossthe
woman’sfaceatlast.“There’snothinglikeit,isthere?Don’tevertellNell,ifyouhappentomeether,butIbake,too,justsomyhousewillsmelllikethatwhenthekidscomeby.Iwanttobethego-toauntorcousinorneighborwhenitcomesto
cookies.”Sheshooedhimtowardthe
door.“Go.I’llbeoverwithyourfoodinjustaminute.”Samdutifullyleftthepub
andcrossedthestreet.Hestoodbesidethecarandwaitedforthewomantoemergewithhisorder.Atleasthetoldhimselfhisgazewassointensebecausehisstomachwasrumbling,butthetruthwas,hewanted
anotherglimpseofher.Shewasamassofcontradictionswithherfancyclothesandhome-bakedcookies,thelostexpressionhe’dcaughtonherfacewhenhefirstnoticedhersittingatthebar,andherfieryindignationwhenshe’dfoundBobbyaloneinthecar.Contradictionslikethat,
though,usuallymeanttrouble.AndthesedaysSamhadmoreofthatthanhe
couldpossiblyhandle.
2
Throughthepub’swindow,Carriestudiedthemanashewaitedbesidethecar.Helookedbone-weary.Littlewonderafterjustsufferingatragiclossandthenfindingouthewasresponsibleforhisnephew.Nolongerfurious
aboutfindingtheboyaloneinthecar,shewasabletocutthemansomeslack,butjustthisonce.She’dbekeepinganeyeonhim,andnotbecausehewashandsomeassinwithhistousledhair,deepblueeyesandfirmjaw,butbecausethatchildwaslikelyinneedofanadvocatewhoknewsomethingaboutkids.WhenLukeemergedfrom
thekitchenwiththetake-out
order,Carrieheldoutherhand.“I’lltakeittohim.”Lukefrowned.“Since
whendidweoffercurbsideserviceandhow’dyougetropedintoit?”“Justgivemethebag.Did
youputinsomeofNell’scookies?”“Youtoldmeto,didn’t
you?OfcourseIdid.Areyoupickingupthecheck,too?”“Veryfunny.Hismoney’s
bytheregister.Keepthechange.”Shewasabouttoopenthe
door,whenLukecalledout.“Carrie!”Shestopped,butdidn’t
turnaround.“Comebackhereafter
you’vedeliveredthat,”hesaid.“Iwasgoingtohead
home.”“Notjustyet,”hesaid
firmly.Afewyearsagoshemight
haveremindedhimhewasn’tthebossofher,butshewasmorematurenow.“Fine,”shesaidgrudgingly.Shecrossedthestreetand
handedoverthebag.Thearomaofthestewmadeherstomachrumble.Maybereturningtothepubwasagoodidea,afterall.Shecouldusesomeofthatstewherself.
“Here,takethisquick,beforeIdecidetodiveinandeatitmyself,”shesaid,handinghimthebag.Hereachedforthebag,
tookasniffandsighed.“Itdoessmellgood.IhopeBobbywilleatit.”“Isheapickyeater?”“It’shardtotell.He’s
shownlittleinterestinanythingthepastcoupleofweeks,butthatcouldbe
becauseofthecircumstances.TheonlythingI’vebeenabletocoaxhimtoeatareburgersandFrenchfries,butIknowIneedtobreakthathabit.”“Nowyou’retalkinglikea
responsibleparent,”shetoldhimapprovingly.Hegaveherawrylook.“If
onlyitwerethateasy.Makesureheeatshealthymealsandallwillberightinhisworld.”
“AreyoustayinghereinChesapeakeShoresorjustpassingthrough?”Whenhedidn’timmediatelyrespond,sheadded,“I’mCarrieWinters,bytheway.”Heheldouthishand.“Sam
Winslow.Igatheryou’realocal.”“Absolutely.Mycousin
Lukeownsthepub.IthinkImentionedthat.Mygrandfather,MickO’Brien,
designedthewholetown.”Heregardedherwith
amusement.“Isthatwhatentitlesyoutodigintothelivesofeveryoneyoumeet?”“That’sjustnatural
curiosity,”shesaid,tryingtokeepadefensivenotefromhervoice.“Andfriendliness.ChesapeakeShoresisknownforbeingaveryfriendlytown.Werolloutthewelcomematforstrangers.
You’dknowthatifyou’dspentanytimehere,whichmustmeanyou’repassingthrough.”Foramomentshethought
hewasn’tgoingtoanswer,butthenhesighedheavily.“ActuallyImovedhereabouttwoweeksbeforemysister’saccident.I’mthenewwebdesignerandtechexpertforthelocalpaper.”Carrie’smoodimmediately
improved.Shebeamedathim.“Thenyou’reworkingforMackFranklin.Thatmakesyoupracticallyfamily.He’smarriedtomycousinSusie—well,mysecondcousin,actually—she’sLuke’ssister.”Heshookhishead,
amazementwrittenonhisface.“TherereallyareO’Brienseverywhereinthistown,aren’tthere?”
Shegesturedtowardthecarvedgoldlettersonadarkgreenbackgroundonthefrontofthepub.“Wedon’ttrytohideit,”shesaid.“Andtherearealotofus,especiallywhenyoutakeintoaccountextendedfamily.Andit’saclose-knitcommunityingeneral.You’regoingtoloveithere,anditwillbeagreatplaceforyournephewtogrowup.”
Exhaustionanddefeatseemedtosettleonhisfaceoncemore.“Ihopeso.Hisparentsdyingsosuddenly,movingtoanewplaceplusadaptingtohavingmeas,well,whateverI’msupposedtobenow.”Heshookhishead.“It’salotforasix-year-oldtohandle.”Carriecouldonlyimagine
howdifficultitmustbe,andnotjustforalittleboy,but
forthisman,aswell.“Ifyoueverwanttotalktosomeone,myauntJess,whoownstheInnatEaglePoint,ismarriedtoashrink.”“WillLincoln?”hesaid,
lookingsurprised.“You’vemethim?”“I’mstillstayingattheinn
tillIcanfindaplacetobuyorrent.I’vehadacoupleofconversationswithWill.Heinvitedmetojoinsomeofthe
guystoshoothoops.Henevermentionedwhathedoesforaliving.”“He’sagreatguy.Orif
youjustneedsomebodytolisten,Luke’snotbad.Helivesuptothestereotypeofabartenderwhocanlistenwithoutpassingjudgment.That’swhyIwasintheretonightspillingmygutstohim.Ihaveaslewofpeopleinmyfamilywho’dhappily
listen,butnotwithouttellingmewhattodo.Lukejustthrewoutsuggestions.Hegavemesomeinterestingfoodforthought.”Samlookedherover
skeptically,apparentlyleapingtoconclusionsbasedonherdesignerclothes,theridiculouslyexpensiveshoesshelovedandtheflawlessmakeupshe’dlearnedtoapplyworkinginfashion,
wherelooksmattered.Beingintheworldofcovermodelsrequiredthatshepayalotofattentiontoherownappearanceifshehopedtocompete.WasittoomuchforChesapeakeShores?Sowhatifitwas?Itwashardlysomethingsheneededtoapologizefor.Sincewhenwaslookingpresentableinpublicacrime?“Youhaveproblems?”he
asked,provingshe’dreadhisdisdaincorrectly.“Everybodyhasproblems,”
shesaid.“Someareworsethanothers,butthatdoesn’tmeantheydon’tmattertothepeopletryingtogetthroughthem.”“Tellmeaboutyours,”he
said.“Didyouhavetroubledecidingwhattoweartonight?PerhapsyourPorschewouldn’tstart?Or
maybeyouacceptedadatewithaguyandaretryingtofigureouthowtogetoutofit?”Thecommentssuggesting
thatshewassoshallowstung,especiallycomingfromamanwhocouldn’tpossiblyknowanythingabouther.Shebackedoffatonce,no
longertryingtohideherannoyance.“Look,Iwasjusttryingtohelp.That’swhatwe
dointhistown.Idon’tdeservetobejudgedorinsulted.”Heturnedandfacedher
then,andshecouldclearlyseethedespairinhisdark,shadowedeyesalongwithwhatwasperhapsjustahintofguilt.“I’msorry,”hesaid.
“Truly.Idon’tknowwhatgotintome.Iusuallyhavebettermannersthanthat.”
“Youobviouslyhavealotonyourmind,”shesaid,decidingyetagaintomakeallowances.Itseemedshewasbeingcalledontomakealotofallowances,somethingsherarelydid.“Sometimessharingaburdenhelps.Ifyoudon’twanttotalktomeorLuke,justaboutanyoneinChesapeakeShoreswouldbeeagertolistenandlendahelpinghand.”
“I’mnotsurethere’sawell-meaningpersononearthwhocanfixthis,”hetoldher.“Well,asdifficultasit
mightbe,timeusuallytakescareofmostproblems.”Shegavehimaruefullook.“Andjustsoyouknow,Idon’thavethepatienceforwaitingforthattohappen,either.I’mjusttoldthatit’strue.”Hesmiledasshe’d
intended.
“I’mprettysurethistestwasdesignedtotrymine,too,”headmitted.“Theydosaykarmahasawayofgettingyou.AcoupleofweeksagoIwasaprettycarefreeguy.NowI’mtenseandcapableofbitingofftheheadofsomeonewho’sonlytryingtobenice.”“You’reprobablyentitled,
butfairwarning,”shesaidlightly.“Iwon’tletyouget
awaywithitagain.”“Thankyou.”Helooked
away.“Thegrief,that’sonething.You’reright.I’llgetoverthatintime.ButbecomingadadtoaboyI’veonlyseenafewtimesbefore...”Heshookhishead.“Ihavenoideahowtodothat.”Hegaveheranotherdoubtfullook.“Anythoughtsonthat?”“Onedayatatime,”she
saidatonce.“Iknowitsoundsglib,butthat’stheonlywaytodoanythingthat’sdifficult,atleastthat’swhatmyfamilyisalwayssaying.Andaskforhelpwhenyouneedit.”“I’vealwaysreliedon
myself.MyparentsarelonggoneandmysisterandI,well,we’dhadourdifferences.Wehadn’tbeenallthatclosethepastfew
years,whichisanotherreasonthiscustodyarrangementcameassuchashock.”Sorrowdarkenedhiseyes.“NowIgettolivewithregretfornotdoingmoretomendfences.Wealwaysthinkwehaveallthetimeintheworldtofixthings.”“I’vefoundthatregretsare
usuallypointless,”shetoldhim.“Thesituationiswhatitis.Youhaveachildto
considernow.Ifyoudorightbyhim,I’msurethat’sallthatwouldreallymattertoyoursister.Andtrustme,whenwordgetsaroundaboutwhatyou’regoingthrough,you’llhaveallthesupportyoucouldpossiblyneed.”Shehesitated,triedtotalk
herselfoutofmakinganimpulsiveoffer,butthenmadeit,anyway.“Infact,ifyouneedanyhelpwithday
care,Icanprobablyhelpout.Idon’trunadaycare,butIwatchmysister’sbabyafewdaysaweek.Severalofmyyoungercousinsstopbyfromtimetotimetohangout.Yournephewwouldbewelcome.Ihaveanendlesssupplyofcookiesonhandandalotofthecoolesttoys.”Forthefirsttimesince
they’dmet,Samsmiled,anditactuallyreachedhiseyes.
Carrie’sheartdidasuddenandentirelypredictableflip,somethingthathadn’thappenedtoherinallthemonthssinceshe’dbeenawayfromEuropeandMarc.Itwasdisconcerting—andveryuntimely,givenherrecentresolutiontoavoidjumpingintoanotherrelationshipanytimesoon.“I’dbettergetbacktothe
pub,”shesaidhurriedly.
“Luke’swaitingforme.AndIhearabowlofthatstewcallingmyname.”“Sure,”Samsaidandheld
upthebag.“Thanksforbringingthistome,andforthecookies.”“Noproblem.And
rememberwhatIsaid,ifyouneedhelp,ask.YoucanalwaysgetmycellphonenumberoraddressfromLukeorMackorSusie.”
Sheturnedandcrossedthestreetquickly.Shehesitatedforjustaninstant,tryingtoassurethattherewasaperfectlyneutralexpressiononherfacebeforeshesawLuke.ShewascarefulnottoglanceoverhershouldertoseeifSamhadleftorevenwaved.Hewasjustaguy,afterall,acustomer.Shedidn’tneedhercousingoingallprotectiveonher.
“Youtooklongenough,”Lukesaid,frowningwhenshefinallywentinside.“You’reluckyIcameback
atall,”sheretorted.“Youknowhowwealldislikebeingorderedtodoanything.AndI’monlyhereforsomeofthatIrishstew,notforoneofyourlectures.”Luke’sscowldeepened.“I
justwanttoknowwhyyouwerewaitingonthatguy.It’s
notasifyouworkhere.Andhewasrude.Imighthavebeeninthekitchen,butI’mnotdeaf.Iheardthewayhetalkedtoyouwhenhefirstcamein.”“Therewereextenuating
circumstances,”shesaid.“Really?Tellme.”Shedebateddoingjustthat,
butdecideditwasn’therstorytotell.“I’msureyou’llbeseeinghimaround.He’s
workingforMack.Getyoursistertofillyouin.Forgetaboutthestew.I’mgoinghome.”“Pleasejusttellmeyou
havenointerestinhimbeyondbeingnicetooneofmycustomers,”hercousinsaid.“WhatifIcan’tsaythat?”“Carrie,comeon.Thatguy
hasissues.”“Noquestionaboutit,”she
agreed.“Don’tyouhaveenough
issuesofyourownwithouttakingonhis?”“I’mnottakingon
anything.I’mbeingfriendly.That’swhatwedoaroundhere.AskMick.”Lukegroaned.“Blastitall!
Ileaveyoualoneinhereforfiveminutesandyoumanagetogettangledupintrouble.”Shelaughedatthe
exaggeration.“Stopfretting.I’mnottangledupinanything,”shesaid,wavingasshewentoutthedoor.Notyet,anyway.
***
MickwatchedhisgranddaughterwalkawayfromO’Brien’sasifshewereinabighurrytogetsomewhere.Shedidn’teven
turnaroundwhenhecalledouttoher.“What’sgoingonwith
her?”hegrumbledtohiswifeasheheldopenthedoortothepub.“Sincewhendoessheignoreherowngrandfather?”“Whenshedoesn’twantto
talkaboutwhatever’sonhermind,”Megansaid.“Eversinceshecamehome,you’vebeenalloverhertomake
somedecisionsaboutherfuture.Maybeshe’stiredofit.”“Well,sheneedstostop
wastingtime,”hereplied.“Youcan’ttellmeshe’sstillbrokenheartedoverthejerkinEurope.Heobviouslywasn’tgoodenoughforher.”“Notyourcall,”Megan
remindedhim.“It’snotaboutwhetherhewasorwasn’tgoodenoughforher,orabout
howlongitshouldtakehertogetoverhim.”Mickjustscowledathis
wife.HehateditwhenMegangotallreasonableandpointedoutthathecouldn’tcontroleverythingaroundhim,especiallywhenitcametohisownfamily.Okay,shewasusuallyright,butthatdidn’tmeanheshouldstoptryingtomakesurethingsworkedoutthewaytheywere
supposedto.“Hey,UncleMick,”Luke
said.“AuntMegan.Doyouallwantatableorareyougoingtositatthebar?”“We’llsitatthebar,”Mick
toldhim.“ThenyoucanfillusinonwhyCarriewasinsuchastatewhenshelefthere.”“Mick!”Meganprotested.
“Don’tinvolveLukeinthis.”Lukeregardedthemwith
aninnocentexpressionthatMickwasn’tbuyingforasecond.“Wassheinsomekindofa
state?”Lukeinquired,asifhehadn’tnoticedathingoutoftheordinaryabouthermood.Mickfrownedathim.“Did
allyoukidsmakeapacttokeepmeinthedarkaboutthings?”Hisnephewlaughed.“No
pact,”heinsisted.“ButIdid
takeanoathtoprotectmycustomers’privacy.”“Carrie’snotacustomer.
She’sfamily.”“Thenmarchrightonover
toherhouseandaskheryourself,”Lukesuggested,settingapintofaleinfrontofMickandaglassofredwineinfrontofMegan,whowastryinghardtobitebackasmile.“Ungratefulwretch,”Mick
mumbled.“WatchitorI’lltellGram
youwerecallingmenames,”Lukeretorted.“Madoesn’tscareme,”
Micksaid.“Well,sheoughtto,”
Megansaid.“Nowhush.Let’shaveanicedinnerandthengohome.”MicksighedasLukebeata
hastyretreat,leavinghimtostewoverthelackof
information.“You’rebothactingasifI’minthewrongforbeingconcernedaboutmyowngranddaughter,”hetoldMegan.“Notwrong,”shesoothed.
“Justmisguided.Carrie’sagrownwoman.She’llfigurethingsoutforherself.Andtobehonest,Mick,themoreyoupush,theharderyou’llmakethatforher.Stubbornnessisafamilytrait.
You,ofallpeople,oughttoknowthat.”Hescowledathiswife.
“YousayingI’mstubborn?”Shegavehiman
incredulouslook.“Youarethekingofstubborn!”shedeclared.“Butyou’realsocaringandthoughtfulandIwouldn’thaveyouanyotherway.Just,please,thisonce,stopyourmeddling.Itwaspartlybecauseofyourgood
intentionsthatourCaitlynbarelymadeitdowntheaislebeforeherbabywasborn.Learnfrompastmistakes.”“Caitlyn’smarriednow,
isn’tshe?AndeveryoneofourkidsandmybrotherJeff’saresettledandhappy,insomemeasureduetomyso-calledgoodintentions.”“Inspiteof,”Megan
corrected.ShecalledouttoLuke,whowashoveringjust
outofviewinthekitchendoorway.“Luke,bringussomeofthatstew,andhurry,please.MaybeifMick’sstomachisfullofsomegoodold-fashionedIrishfood,he’lltakeabreakfromfrettingaboutCarrie.”Mickfrownedatthe
suggestion.“I’mperfectlycapableofdoingtwothingsatonce,”hetoldher.Sheleanedoverandkissed
hischeek.“Iknow,”shesaidquietly.“More’sthepity.Ifyouneedsomethingelsetochewon,howaboutthis?”Thesuggestionshe
whisperedinhisearforhowtheymightspendtherestoftheeveningprettymuchwipedallthoughtsofhisgranddaughterandherproblemsrightoutofhishead.Hegrinnedathiswife.“Cleverwoman,”he
murmuredapprovingly.“Youhaven’tlovedmeall
theseyearsfornoreason,”shesaidsmugly.Micksighed.Thatwastrue
enough.Evenduringalltheyearsthey’dbeenapart,he’dlovedhertopieces.Ithadjusttakengettingpasthishurtpridetogivehimthecouragetofighttowinherback.Nowthathehad,maybeheshouldn’tbewastingquiteso
muchtimeonfixingeverybodyelse’slives.“I’llmakeyouadeal,”he
offered.“What’sthat?”“Fortherestoftonightyou
havemyfullattention.”“Andthen?”sheasked.“Yourunyourartgallery
duringtheday,andI’lldothethingsIneedtodo.”“Ofcourseyouwill,”she
saidwithasigh.“Butifthat’s
thebestIcanhopefor,atleastCarriewillhavethenightofffromyourinterference.”Mickgaveanodof
satisfaction.HedoubtedCarrie’sproblemwouldresolveitselfovernight.He’dmakeithispriorityfirstthinginthemorning.
***
Carriewanderedaroundthecottage,halfexpectinghergrandfathertoappearanyminutewithmoreofhisquestionsanddisappointedlookswhenshehadnoanswersforhim.Whenheneverappeared,sheknewsheprobablyhadGrandmaMeganandmaybeevenLuketothank.Oddlyenough,shewould
havewelcomedthe
distractionofoneofGrandpaMick’scross-examinations.ImagesofSamWinslowwerealittletooenticingforhercomfort,especiallywhencounterpointedagainstthedisdainshe’dfeltradiatingfromhimduringtheirconversation.Addinhisboneheadedmoveofleavinghisnephewaloneinthecar,nomatterhowhe’djustifiedit,andhedefinitelywasn’t
someonesheshouldbegivingthetimeofday.Lukehadprobablybeenrightaboutthat.Shewasn’tcrazyaboutacknowledgingthat,either.Whenherphonerang,she
seizedit,gratefulfortheexcusetoescapeherconflictedreactiontotheman.“Whowastheguy?”her
twinaskedthesecondCarrieanswered.
“Excuseme?”“Theguyatthepub,”
Caitlynsaid.“Theonewhogotyoualltiedupinknots.”“Therewasnoguy,”Carrie
said,thenamended,“Well,therewasamanwhocamein.Wehadwords.Iactuallyyelledathim.”“Youyelledathim,”Cait
repeated,soundingshocked.“Whywouldyoudothat?”“Heleftachildaloneinhis
parkedcar.IdiscoveredtheboysoundasleepinthebackseatwhenIwasleavingthepub.”“Sothisguyleftasleeping
childinacar,thencameintothepubtodrink?”“Nottodrink,”Carriesaid
hurriedly.“Toordertakeout.Andtobefair,hewaskeepinganeyeontheboythewholetime,butIfreakedoutjustthesame.”
“Idon’tblameyou.Butthesecondyourealizedtheguywasanirresponsiblejerk,why’dyouhangoutwithhim?”“Ididn’thangoutwith
him,”Carrierepliedimpatiently.“How’dyouhearaboutthis,anyway?”“Noahstoppedbythepub
afterworkwithJackson.HeandLukegottotalking.Lukewasworried.Hethoughthe
detectedsomesparksflyingbetweenthetwoofyou.”“Lukeneverevensawusin
thesameroom,”Carrieargued.“Hedoesn’tknowanything.”“Okay,hehashis
suspicions,”Caitlynsaidwithexaggeratedpatience.“HesharedthemwithNoah.”“PleasetellmeGrandpa
Mickwasnowherearoundwhentheyhadthis
conversation.”“Noahdidn’tmentionour
grandfather.Whywouldyouthinkhewasthere?”“BecauseheandGrandma
MeganweregoinginjustafterIleft.Hecalledouttome,butIpretendednottohearhimandkeptonwalking.”“Oh,boy!”Caitsaid.“I’m
surethatwentoverwell.Don’tyouknowbynowthat
justmakesGrandpaMickmoredeterminedtofindoutwhat’sgoingon?”“Iknow,”Carriesaidwith
asigh.“I’vebeenexpectinghimtoturnuphereeversinceIgothome.”“Soyouapparentlygota
reprievetillmorning,”Caitconcluded.“Nowtellmemoreaboutthisguywho’sajerk.What’shisname?”“SamWinslow.He’sthe
newwebdesignerandtechexpertforMackatthepaper.YouknowhowmuchMackdependsonwhoever’sinthatposition.Hesaysthepaper’swebpresenceiswhat’ssavingitfromfailure.Theguycan’tbeatotalflakeifMacktrustshim.”“Andtheboy?IsSama
singledad?”Carrietoldherwhatshe
knewofhowtheboyhad
cometobewithSam.Thestorywasmetwithanuncomfortablesilence.“Comeon,”shesaid,
resignedtotheinevitable.“Saysomething.Iknowyouwantto.”“Oh,sweetie,youalready
knowwhatI’mgoingtotellyou,”Caitlynsaid,soundingworried.“Stayfar,farawayfromthissituation.You’llgetsuckedin.Iknowyouwill,
andthere’saverygoodchanceyou’llgetyourheartbroken.”“Howcanyousaythat?He
obviouslyneedshelp.”“Notfromyou,”Cait
insisted.“You’revulnerable.Youwantafamilytoomuch.He’lltakeadvantageofthat.”“Nobody’sgoingtotake
advantageofme,”Carrierepliedirritably.“Marcdid,”Caitreminded
hergently.“Thatwasdifferent.”“Itwas,”hersisteragreed.
“Hedidn’thaveachildtosweetentheappeal.”“You’rewrong,”Carrie
said.“I’mgoingtobed.Goodnight.”“Don’thangupangry,”
Caitpleaded.“Justbecareful,that’sallI’msaying.”No,Carriethoughtwitha
sigh.Shewassayingsomuch
more.Worse,justlikeLuke,shewasprobablyright.
3
Samputthedinnerhe’dorderedatO’Brien’sintothebackseatofhisSUVnexttoBobby.TheboyhadbeensleepingwhilehewastalkingtoCarrieWinters,buthewaswide-awakenowandlookingaroundwithacurious
expression.“Arewehomeyet?”he
askedSam,histoneplaintive.“Justabout,buddy.We’ll
behomeinacoupleofminutes.Istoppedlongenoughtopickupsomedinnerforus.”“Where?Idon’tsee
McDonald’s.”SampointedtoO’Brien’s.
“Seetherestaurantrightacrossthestreet?Dinner
camefromthereandit’sgoingtobedelicious.I’mtoldtheremightevenbesomehomemadecookiesinthebagfordessert.”“Howcomeyoudidn’t
takemewithyou?”“Youweresleeping.”Bobby’sexpressionturned
serious.“Mommyneverleftmealoneinthecar.Shesaiditwastoodangerous,evenwhenItoldherIwasbig
enoughtotakecareofmyself.”Onceagain,allofhis
shortcomingsasaprospectivefatherslappedSamintheface.He’ddiscoveredthatnoonecouldinduceguiltquitelikeasix-year-old...except,perhaps,anindignant,red-hairedstranger.“Yourmomwasabsolutely
right,butyouwerejustafewyardsawayandrightwhereI
couldseeyouthewholetimeIwasinsidetherestaurant,”Samsaidinhisowndefense.HewonderedifthatsoundedashollowtoBobbyasitobviouslyhadtoCarrieWinters?“AndChesapeakeShoresis
alotsaferthanthecity,evenoneassafeasLouisville,”headdedforgoodmeasure.“DoesthatmeanIcanplay
outsidebymyself?”Bobby
askedhopefully.“Mommyneverletmedothat.ShesaidIalwayshadtobewithagrown-up.”Thatsoundedjustlike
Laurel,Samthought.Asfarbackashecouldremembershe’dbeenmakinguprulesandissuingorders.Asakidhe’dresentedit,butwiththehindsightofmaturity,hecouldseethatshe’dbeentryingtomakeupforthe
chaosoftheirfamilylife.Ithadbeenherself-assignedtasktoprotecthim.Recallinghowoftenthey’dbuttedheadsandrecognizingnowhowgoodherintentionshadbeenbroughtthestingoftearstohiseyes.Howhadheletsomestupidargumentcomebetweenthem?“We’llhavetoworkthat
out,”Samhedged,fightingtearsashedrovealongthe
curving,waterfrontroadtotheInnatEaglePoint.He’dvowednottoshowanysignofweaknessinfrontofhisnephew.Bobbyneededtobelieveinhim.“Firstweneedtogetyou
enrolledinschool,soyoucanmakelotsofnewfriendsthisfall,”Samcontinued,injectinganupbeatnoteintohisvoice.“Andweneedtofindarealhousesoyoucan
haveyourownroomandmaybeevenabigyardtoplayin.”Bobby’seyeswidened.
“Youdon’tliveinahouse?”“Notyet.Ijustmoved
here,remember?I’mstayingataninn.Itlooksjustlikeagreatbighouse,though.”“Iwenttoahotelonce.Is
itlikethat?”Hiseyesbrightenedwithexcitement.“Doesithaveroomservice?”
“Ihaven’ttriedit,butIimagineitdoes.Wecancheckthatoutinthemorning.Iknowithasadiningroomwithlotsofwindowssoyoucanseethebayandallthebigbirdslikeospreyandeagles.Icansayforafactthatthepancakesarereally,reallygood.”ThelasthintofBobby’s
uncertaintyvanishedcompletely.“Ilove
pancakes,”hesaidwithasighofsatisfaction.“MommyonlymadethemonSundays,though.”“Well,hereyoucanhave
themanydayyouwantthem,”Sampromised.“Atleastaslongaswe’reattheinn.”Hisnephewfellsilentuntil
theypulledintotheparkinglotoftheinn.“Wow!It’sthebiggesthouseever!CanI
playintheyard?Canwegoswimming?”Hiseyesgrewevenbigger.“Itevenhasapool.Inever,everwanttoleavehere.”Samchuckledathis
suddenburstofenthusiasm.IthadbeeninshortsupplyforthepastcoupleofweeksasSamhaddealtwiththedetailsofthefuneral,puttinghissister’shouseupforsale,andfacingtheshockingnewsthat
he’dbeennamedBobby’sguardian.Hissister’sin-lawshadthreatenedtofighthimforcustodyuntilthelawyerhadconvincedthemthewillwasairtightandthatSamhadtheenergytocopewithaninquisitive,livelysix-year-old,somethingaretiredcoupleintheirsixtiesandlivingonafixedincomemightnotbeabletohandle.“I’mafraidwecan’tstay
hereforever,”hetoldBobby.“Itcostsalotofmoney,butIpromiseyouwe’llpickahousethatyou’regoingtolovejustasmuch.Youcanhelpmedecideontherightone.”Afamiliarfrownsettledon
Bobby’sfaceandSam’sstomachtieditselfintoknots.Hecouldfeelthedisappointmentradiatingfromthebackseat.Howmany
timeswashedestinedtoletthisboydownbeforeeveryonerealizedwhatamistakehadbeenmadeingivinghimcustody?“Sam?”Bobbywhispered
hesitantly.Samturnedandsawtears
dampeningBobby’sroundcheeksandrealizedthiswasaboutmorethanstayingattheinn.“What,buddy?”“Ifwekeepmoving,how
areMommyandDaddygoingtofindus?”Sam’shearttwisted.“We
talkedaboutthat,remember?Yourmommyanddaddycan’tcomeback.They’reinheaven.”“Butyousaidthatevenin
heaven,they’dalwaysbelookingoutforme.Howaretheygoingtofindme?”heasked,hisexpressionwaytooseriousandworriedfora
childhisage.Samhadneverfeltmore
outofhisdepthinhislife.“That’sthethingaboutheaven,”hesaideventually,prayinghewasgettingitright.“Thepeoplewelovewholivetherecanseeuswhereverweare.Yourmomanddadwillalwaysknowexactlywhereyouareandwhentheyaskedmetotakecareofyou,theyknewIwas
inChesapeakeShores.”“Havetheybeenhere?”“No,butI’llbettheyhave
thisamazingGPSthinginheavenandit’salreadyguidedthemrighthere.”“Really?”Samnodded,thoughhe
wascertainofnosuchthing.Hewantedtobelieve.Hereallydid.Butwhatsortofgodtookawayalittleboy’sparentsandlefthimallalone
withanunclewhodidn’thaveaclueabouthowtoraisehimself,muchlessachild?Evenasthosewordscrossedhismind,herememberedLaurelsayingmuchthesamething,tellinghimitwastimetostophisrestlessroamingandgrowup.He’daccusedher—yet,again—oftryingtocontrolhim.Theheatedexchange,oneofmanyinasimilarvein,had
occurredmonthsago,butithadbeenthelaststraw.Afterthathe’dsimplyavoidedtakinghissister’scalls,leavingmessageswhenhe’dknownshewouldn’tbehomesoshewouldn’tworry,butnotwantingtoriskanotherlectureonhisflaws.Despitethedistancethathadgrownbetweenthem,she’dneverstoppedtextingpicturesofBobbyorsendingnoteson
specialoccasions.Tohercredit,she’ddoneallshecouldtokeepthelinesofcommunicationopen,whilehe’dbehavedlikeaspoiledjerk.He’dlivewiththatregrettherestofhislife.Samclimbedoutofthecar,
thenopenedthebackdoortohelpBobbyoutofhisboosterseat,buttheboyhadalreadyscrambledfree.Heracedacrossthewideexpanseof
greenlawntowardthewater,thenturnedbackjustasSamfearedhemightgotopplingstraightovertheedgeofthecliffoverlookingthebay.Hehadtorememberjusthowfastasix-year-oldcouldmoveanddoabetterjobofstayingonhistoesatalltimes.“Comeon,kid.Let’sgoin
andeatdinnerbeforeitgetscold.Thenwecangetyou
settleddownforthenight.We’vehadalongday.Tomorrow’ssoonenoughtodealwithallthecomplicatedstuff.”Andmaybebytomorrow,
he’dhavesomeclueabouthowtodothat.Surprisingly,itwasthememoryofCarrieWinters’simpulsiveoffertohelpoutwithdaycarethatcenteredhimenoughtogetthroughonemorenight.Even
ifhenevertookheruponit,justknowingbackupwasaroundseemedtoeasehispanic.
***
Carrieknewthattheoddsofgettingthroughthemorningwithoutavisitfromhergrandfatherwerebetweenslimandnone.Toatleastpostponetheinevitable,she
headedtothecaféonMainStreetforbreakfast.Therewasaverygoodchancetherewouldbelotsoffamilyaroundsincemanyofherauntshadstoresnearby,andhergrandmother’sartgallerywasrightaroundthecorner.TheytendedtostarttheirdayatSally’swithcoffee,raspberrycroissantsandconversation.Carriecouldcatchuponthetowngossip
andavoidhergrandfatheratthesametime.ThenshecouldgobyNoah’sandpickupJacksonforthedaysinceNoahhadofficehoursfromearlymorninguntildinnertimeonWednesdays.Sureenough,atSally’sshe
foundherauntsBree,ShannaandHeatheralreadyontheirsecondcupsofcoffee,telltalecrumbsfromtheircroissantsstillontheirplates.Two
raspberryandonechocolate,fromthelookofit.“Didyouleaveanyof
thosecroissantsforme?”shedemandedassheslidintotheboothbesideBree.“Iputachocolateoneaside
foryou,”Sallytoldherwithawinkasshepouredacupofcoffee.“Andthere’saraspberryforyourgrandmotherwhenshegetshere,too.”
“Thankyou,”Carriesaidgratefully.“You’rethebest.”“Ijustknowmycustomers.
Ihearalotoftalkaboutcarbsanddietingwhenyouallareinhere,butthere’snotamorningthatgoesbythatmytrayoffreshcroissantsdoesn’tmagicallydisappear.”AfterSallylefttogether
croissant,Carrieglancedaroundthetableandnotedalltheexpectantlooks.“So,
what’sup?”“Maybeyoushouldtell
us,”Breesuggestedslyly.“Wordonthefamilygrapevineisthatyouhadalittletiffwithamanatthepublastnight.Lukeswearshesawsparks.Hemaybealotofthings,buthe’snotusuallyattunedtothosekindofundercurrents,soI’mguessingtheyhadtobemorelikefireworksforhimto
notice.”Carrietookadeepbreath
asshetriedtoavoidtheseaofcuriousstares.Sheneededastrategytogetoutofthisconversation.Shegazedateachwomanintently,thenbeganinnocently,“Outofmydeeprespectforyouasmyelders...”Beforeshecouldcomplete
thesentence,herwordsdrewtheexpectedhorrifiedgasps.
Shebarelymanagedtocontainachuckleattheirpredictablereaction.“Andbecauseofmydeep
understandingofwhateachofyouwentthroughwithtoomuchmeddlinginyourlives,”shecontinued,thenbeamedatBree,“I’mgoingtoignorethatlineofconversation.”Heatherwasthefirstto
recover.“Nicelyplayed,”she
said,anoteofgrudgingapprovalinhervoice.“Butwedon’thavetolike
it,”Shannaadded.“AndI’mgonnatellyour
motheryoucalledusold,”Breeclaimed,lookingthoroughlydisgruntled.“Sinceshe’solderthananyofus,Idoubtshe’llappreciateit.”Carrielaughed.“Ididn’t
callyouold.Isaidyouwere
myelders.That’sanundeniabletruth.AndIdorespecteachandeveryoneofyou.BesuretotellMomIsaidthat,too.”“Sowe’renotgoingtoget
athingoutofyouabouttheman?”Heatherasked,clearlydisappointed.“Nothingtotell,”Carrie
insisted.“YoucouldalwaysaskSusieabouthim.Theguy’sworkingforMackat
thepaper.They’reboundtohavecrossedpaths.”Allthreewomenpromptly
lookeddismayed.Carriestudiedtheirfaces,thenasked,“What?HassomethinghappenedwithSusie?Iranintoheracoupleofdaysago.Sheseemedfinethen.”“YouknowsheandMack
wantababyintheworstway,”Breesaid.“Sure,”Carriesaid.“They
finallydecidedtoadopt.IthoughtUncleConnorwastryingtohelpwithaprivateadoptionthroughhisoldlawfirminBaltimore.SusiewaspracticallyburstingwithexcitementwhenIsawher.Shesaidthebabywasdueanyminute.”Ahorrifyingthoughtoccurredtoher.“Nothinghappenedtothebaby,didit?”“Notexactly,”Heather
responded.“Notthewayyoumean.”“Thenwhat?”Carrie
asked.“Connorkeptcautioning
themthatthingscouldgowrong,butSusiewassosurethiswasit.Ifyousawher,youknowhowshewasfloatingonair,makingalltheseplans.Andthen,attheverylastminute,themothergottogetherwithher
boyfriendandtheydecidedtokeepthebaby.”“Oh,no,”Carrie
whispered.“Susie’sdevastated.
Connorsaidthelookonherfacewhenhebrokethenewswassomethinghehopednevertoseeagain.NothingMacksaidordidcouldconsoleher.Shesaysshecan’tgothroughthatagain.”“She’sgivingup?”Carrie
asked,genuinelyshocked.O’Briensdidn’tgiveupthateasily,notwhensomethingtrulymatteredasmuchasababymatteredtoSusie.“That’swhatshetold
Connor,”Heatherconfirmed.“Mackthinksshe’llcomearoundonceshegetsoverthislatestdisappointment,butIdon’tknow.Ispoketoherlastnightforabouttwominutes.Shesounded
terrible,buttheonethingsheseemedcertainaboutwasherdecisionthatthiswasit.Iofferedtogooversoshecouldvent,butshesaidshewasn’tinthemoodforcompany,thattherewasnothingmoretobesaid,anyway.”“Andshe’snotherethis
morning,”Shannaadded.“Thelasttimetheygotcloseandtheadoptionfellapart,
shedidn’tleavethehouseforaweek.Thistimecouldbeworse.Shereallythoughtaprivateadoptionwastheanswer,aguaranteeofsomekind,despiteallConnor’swarningsthatthingscouldgowrong.”“She’dactuallypaintedthe
nurserythistime,becausesheknewitwasgoingtobeagirl,”Breesaid.“Iwasovertherejustlastweekandshe
haddrawersfilledwithfrillylittleoutfitsforthebaby.”“That’ssosad,”Carrie
said,unabletoimaginethedepthofSusie’sdisappointment.She’dbeensobraveallthroughherboutwithovariancancer,evenafterfindingoutshe’dneverhavechildrenofherown.Nowthis.“IsthereanythingIcan
do?”Carrieasked.
“Shehastocometous,”Breesaid.“She’lldothatwhenshe’sready.I’mhopingshe’lltalktoJess.Forbeingsuchrivalswhentheywerekids,theyformedareallyclosebondduringSusie’scancertreatments.Maybeshe’llopenuptoher.”“Andifshedoesn’t?”
Carrieasked,notlikingtheideaofSusiegoingthroughthisalone.Familieswere
supposedtosticktogetherintimesofcrisis,evenwhenthepersonpushedthemaway.ThatwasanotherofthelessonsNellhadtaughtallofthem.“Thenwe’llgotoherina
fewdays,”Heatherassuredher.“You,too,ifyouwanttocome.”Shesighed.“AlthoughrightnowIhaveanewbabyathome.I’mnotsurehowshefeelsaboutthat.
Shesaysalltherightthings,butI’veseenthestrickenlookonherfacewhenshehastobearoundthebaby.”“SohaveI,”Shannasaid.
SheandCarrie’suncleKevinhadjusthadanotherchild,aswell.“Sheskippedthewholechristeningandthepartyafterward.Shehadanexcuse,butitwasprettyflimsy.”“Itmustjustaboutkillher
tobearoundallthesebabies
inourfamily,”Breesaid.“Butwecan’tfeelguiltyaboutit.Allwecandoistrytobeunderstandingandsupportive.”Carriesatbackinherseat
andsighed,thinkingofSamandhowhe’dbecomeadadwhenheleastexpectedit.Didheappreciatewhatagiftthatwas?Maybeintimehewould,butrightnowtherewaslittlequestionthathewas
strugglingwithit.AndtherewasSusie,desperatetoholdachildofherown,butrunningoutofoptions.Lifesometimestrulywasunfair.NellwouldassurethemallthatGodhadaplan,butCarriesurewishedHe’dletthemallinonit.
***
Mackwasathiswit’send.
SusiehadbeensittingonthedeckoftheirhomeonBeachLaneforhours,staringoutatthebayandclutchingthehandmadebabyquiltshe’dboughtatHeather’sshop.He’dknownwhenshe’d
broughtithomethatthequiltwasabadideaandthatpaintingthenurseryandbuyingaboatloadofbabyclotheswereevenworseideas,butSusiehadn’tbeen
deterred.She’dbelievedwitheveryfiberofherbeingthatthistimetheyweregoingtogettheirchild,adaughter,accordingtoConnor’sformerassociateinBaltimore,thelawyerhandlingthearrangements.“Babe,comeinside,”he
begged.“Youneedsomesleep.”Sheshookherhead.“Not
yet.”
“Youwereouthereallnight.”Heknewbecausehe’dawakenedtoanemptybed.He’dcheckedonherhalfadozentimesduringthenight,butshe’drefusedtocomebacktobed.Heavingaresignedsigh,
Mackbroughthiscoffeeandjoinedheronthedeck,ignoringthelookthattoldhimshe’dprefertogorightonbeingalone.
Hesetthecoffeeaside,thenpulledhischaircloseenoughtoreachforherhand.Eventhoughitwasawarmmorning,herhandwaslikeiceandtrembledinhis,butatleastshedidn’tpullaway.Susiewasthebravest,most
courageouswomanhe’deverknown.He’dneverseenherthisdefeated,notevenwhenshe’dbeenbattlingcancerandsickenedbychemoand
radiation.She’dhadhershareofdownmoments,herdoubtsaboutherfuture,butthiswasdifferent.Therewasasteelyresolvebehindherdecisiontogiveup,onethatleftlittleroomforargumentorhope.“Iloveyou,”hetoldher,
holdingontight,willinghertodrawonhisstrength.Sheturnedandgavehima
vaguesmile.“Iknow.”“Areyoureadytotalk
aboutthis?”Onceagainsheshookher
head.“Whatistheretotalkabout?”“Whatwe’regoingtodo
next,”hesuggested.“Nothing,”shesaidflatly.
“It’sover.”“It’sonlyoverifwegive
up.”“Well,that’swhatI’m
doing.I’mgivingup.”Sheturnedandgavehiman
earnestlook.“Ican’tgothroughthisagain,Mack.NowIhavesomeideaofhowwomenfeelaftermiscarriages.Theycarrythislittlebabyinsideofthem,insidetheirhearts,evenifonlyforafewweeks,andthenit’sover.There’snobabytohold.”“Therightbabywillcome
along,”heinsisted,thoughheknewnosuchthing.“Orwe
couldlookintoanolderchildadoption.Thinkofallthechildrenwhoneedlovingfamilies,kidswho’vebouncedaroundinfostercare.Wecouldopenourheartsandourhometothem.Maybethat’swhatwe’remeanttodo.”Susieclosedhereyesand,
hesuspected,herears,toblockouthiswords.“Ican’tdoit,Mack.Pleasedon’thate
me,butIcan’t.”Mackwasn’tsurewhatto
say.Susiehadalwaysbeenmorecertainaboutparenthoodthanhewas.Ithadbeenherdreamand,becausehelovedhersoblasteddeeply,he’dwantedtogiveherthat,nomatterhowthechildcameintotheirlives.Hecouldacceptherdecisionandmoveon,butheknewinhishearttheday
wouldcomewhenshe’dregretit.Maybeheneededtoacceptherdecisionfornow,thenbringthisupagainwhenthislatestwoundwasn’tsofresh.Sheglancedhisway.
“HaveyouheardfromSam?How’shecopingwithlosinghissister?”“He’sdoingokay,Ithink,”
Macksaid,relievedtohavehershowaninterestin
something,evenifshewasonlydoingittochangethesubject.“Theaccidentcameasaterribleshock,butthere’smore.He’sreeling,infact.”Realinterestsparkedinher
eyes.“Why?Whatelsehappened?”“Hissisterandbrother-in-
lawnamedhimguardianoftheirson,asix-year-oldboy.”Shockspreadacrossher
face.“Sam’sadad?Justlike
that?”Mackhesitated,sensing
thatthenewshadstirredenvyasmuchassurprise.Heshouldhaveconsideredthatandkeptquiet,butitwasouttherenow.“Itwasashocktohim,
too,”Mackreported.“Hesaidhe’dtellmemorewhenhegotbacktotown.Ithinkhewashopingtomakeitbylastnight.Iimaginehe’llcheckin
latertoday.Itoldhimtotakeaslongasheneeds.Wecanmanageokayatthepaperforanotherweek,ifheneedsthatlongtodealwiththesituation.Evenlonger,ifneedbe.”Thatvacantstarereturned
toSusie’seyes.“Samhasason,”shemurmured.“Ofallpeople.”“Hey,”Mackprotested.
“Sam’sagoodguy.”
“Isupposeso.He’satalentedwebdesigner,forsure,andatechgeniustohearyoutellit,butcomeon,Mack,doyoureallyseehimasdadmaterial?”“I’mthelastpersontoask
aboutthat.Idon’tknowwhatittakestobeagoodfather.”“Reliability’sagoodplace
tostart,”shesaid.“Samisreliable.”“Heleftyouinthelurch
rightafterhestartedonthejob,”shesaid,acriticalnoteinhervoice.“Babe,hissisterand
brother-in-lawwerekilled.Didyouexpecthimnottoattendthefuneral?”“Well,hehasn’texactly
settleddown,hashe?He’sstilllivingattheinn.”Macksuspectedshewas
utteringthesejudgmentsforareason,onehedidn’t
particularlylike.“He’donlybeenhereacoupleofweeks,hardlyenoughtimetofindahouseorevenanapartment,”hesaid,defendingSam.“Whereareyougoingwiththis,Suze?”“Howmanyjobshashe
heldoverthepastfewyears?Three?Four?Whatkindofmandoesthat?”sheaskedwithoutrespondingtohisquestionabouthermotives.
“Someonewho’stalentedandverymuchindemandinanewfield,”Mackreplied,notsurewhyhewassoardentlydefendingamanhebarelyknewhimself,buthavingthefeelingthatheneededtomakehispositionclear.Susieseemedtobeheadinginaworrisomedirection.She’dlikedSamwellenoughwhenthey’dhadhimoverfordinner.Thishad
tobeabouttheboy,thoughMackhopedhewaswrongaboutthat.“Weshouldgoovertothe
innandseehowthey’redoing,”shesaidoutoftheblue,standingupandprovingthatMack’sinstinctshadbeenrightontarget.“Thismorning?You
haven’tsleptawink.Youneedrestmorethanyouneedtoberunningaroundpaying
socialcalls.”Shefrownedathim.“I
wanttoseeformyselfhowSam’scopingwithachildtocarefor.”SinceMackhadbeen
prayingforadistractionforSusie,evenoneasmisguidedashewassurethisonewas,hetoldhimselfhecouldcontrolthesituationandgavein.“Whileyoutakeashower,
I’llcallJesstoseeifhe’sback.Ifheis,we’llgowhenyou’redressed,”hesaid.“Whywait?”sheasked,
givinghimabewilderedlook.“Becauseyou’vebeen
wearingthatsamerobeforthepasttwodays.Youcan’tgoanywhereinthat.”Sheglanceddownasif
surprisedbythereminder.“Iwon’ttakelong,”shepromised.“Iknowyouneed
togettowork.Goahead,ifyouwantto.Icanstopbyonmyown.”“Notachance.I’mgoing
withyou,”Macksaid.Heneededtoseeforhimselfifhiswifeintendedsomethingmorethanakindheartedvisittoanemployeewho’djustsufferedaterribleloss.Susieleveledaknowing
gazestraightathim.“I’mnotjumpingoffthedeepend,”
shetoldhim.“IknowIcan’tgoswoopinginandtakealittleboyawayfromSam,nomatterhowdesperateImightbefeeling.”Mackwasrelievedtohear
herexpresshisexactconcern.“I’mgladtohearthat’snotwhatyouwerethinking.”Shetouchedhischeek.“I
loveyouforcaringsomuchandforworryingaboutme.I’msad,butI’mnotcrazy.”
Hepulledherintohisarms.“Inever,forevenasecond,thoughtyouwere.”Afaintsmiletuggedather
lips.“Itcrossedyourmind,MackFranklin.Don’tyoudaretrytodenyit.Ihonestlycan’tblameyou.IhavebeensittingaroundherewallowingeversinceConnortoldusweweren’tgoingtogetourbaby.I’llprobablywallowsomemorebeforeI’mdone.”
Herestedhischinonthetopofherheadandheldherclose.“Takeallthetimeyouneed.AndifcheckingonSamandhisnephewwillreassureyousomehow,I’mallforit.Iimaginehe’llappreciatethegesture.Hemustbefreakingoutaboutnow.”“Ihopenot,”shesaid,her
expressionturningwistful.“Ihopehe’sonhisknees
thankingGodforthegifthe’sbeengiven.”Macktuckedafingerunder
herchin.“Suze,ifhe’snottherejustyet,itdoesn’tmeanhewon’tgetthere.Lookhowlongit’stakenmetobelieveIcouldbeadecentparent.Aftergrowingupwithpoorexamplesinmylife,Ihadmoredoubtsthananyonecouldimagine,butyoubelievedinme.Sodidyour
family.Samneedsoursupport,notsomebodywaitinginthewingstosnatchthatchildawayatthefirstsignofamisstep.”“Iknowthat,”shesaid,
indignationinhervoice,evenasshewascarefultoavoidhisgaze.Mackwishedshewerehalf
asconvincingasshe’dobviouslyintendedtobe.Instead,hefearedwhatmight
happenifsheseizedonthesituationtofilltheemptyspaceinherheart.Thepastfewdaysofdespairwouldseemlikeapicniccomparedtotheheartacheinstoreifthathappened.
4
WithSusiestillverymuchonhermind,CarriewalkedthefewblockstothehousethathadbeenconvertedintoNoah’smedicalofficesonthegroundfloor.Theupstairshadbeenturnedintoacozyapartmentforhim,Caitand
thebaby.OnceCaitwasfinishedwithhermedicaltrainingandhomeforgood,itwouldprobablybemuchtoosmallforagrowingfamily,butfornowGrandpaMickhadconverteditintoawarm,welcominghome.Itwastoobad,Carriethought,thathertwinwasrarelyheretoenjoyitorherfamily.Carrieusedherkeytothe
sideentrancetotheoffices
andfoundNoah’snurse,WendyKaine,alreadythere,bustlingaroundinthebrightlypaintedexaminingrooms,gettingreadyforanotherbusyday.“Youheretopickupthe
littleman?”Wendyaskedwithagrinasawailcarriedallthewayfromupstairs.“Goodluck.Heseemstobeexpressinghimselfquiteclearlytoday.Heisnota
happylittleboy.”Carriewincedatthesound.
Noah,whopridedhimselfonsoothingevenhismostdifficultyoungpatients,mustbeathiswit’sendaboutnow.“Icouldhideoutdownheretillhisdaddygetshimcalmeddown,”shewhisperedtoWendy.“Coward,”thenurse
accused.“Marchrightonupthereandshowthetwoof
themwho’sboss.”“Noah’sprobablytryingto
makehimeatmoreofthatboringbabycerealagain,”Carriesaid.“Jacksonreallyhatesthatstuff.IguessIshouldgoupandsavehim.”“Himwho?Jacksonor
Noah?”Wendyasked.“I’msurethebabywillappreciateit.Noah,too.IknowIwill.”Carriehurriedupthesteps,
tappedonthedoortothe
livingquarters—notthatitcouldlikelybeheardoverthebaby’snoisysobs—andwentinside.Sureenough,Noahhada
spooninhishand,afrustratedexpressiononhisface,andfarmorecerealonhisshirtthancouldpossiblybeinthelittleboywhowaswavinghisfistsandhadbig,fattearsrollingdownhischubbycheeks.
JacksonspottedCarrieandimmediatelyheldouthisarms.Adroolingsmilelituphisface.ShegrinnedatNoah,then
passedhimandpickeduptheeight-month-old.“That’sright,sweetie.AuntCarrieisheretosaveyoufromhavingtoeatthatnastyoldcereal.”Noahfrownedather.
“You’vebeentellingmeheeatsitforyou.”
Sheleanedcloser,thebabyclingingtightlytoher.“Wanttoknowmysecret?”“Please,”hesaid,sounding
alittledesperate.“Imixinalittle
applesauce.Helovesapplesauce.”Noahclosedhiseyes.“Of
course.Whydidn’tIthinkofthat?”“Becauseyouprobably
nevertastedthecereal
yourselfandhadnoideahowawfulitis.IbelievepeacheswerethefruitofchoiceforCaitandme.Andintheinterestoffulldisclosure,Ididn’tdreamthisuponmyown.MomgavemethetipafterI’dspentaweekwashingcerealoutofmyhair.”Noahlaughedthen.“Ifeel
awholelotbetternow.”Hisexpressionsobered.“Yousay
thisworkedforyouandCait?”Carrienodded.“Hmm.Shenever
suggestedit,either.I’mthinkingmywifedeliberatelyomittedafewhelpfultipswhensheleftmeincharge.”“Couldbe,”Carrieagreed.
“Shedoesliketofeelsuperior.Now,go.Changeshirtsandgettowork.Ihavethingsundercontrolhere.As
soonasIhaveJacksonfedandcleanedup,we’llheadonovertomyhousesopeaceshouldreignhereforyouandyourpatients.”“Thankyou,”Noahsaid,
histoneheartfelt.“Imeanit,Carrie.Idon’tknowwhatwe’ddowithoutyou.Thefirstcoupleofmonths,whenJacksonwaswithCaitinBaltimoresoshecouldbreast-feedhim,Ihadnoidea
ofwhatshemustbegoingthrough,evenwithhelp.Iwassosureitwouldbeeasierformehere,withfamilyallaround.I’madoctor.Idealwithsickkidsonadailybasis.They’renotusuallyinthebestmood,butthey’remostlysaintscomparedtomyownson.”“Jacksonisasweetlittle
angel,”shecorrected.Noahsmiled.“Well,it’sa
goodthingyou’resmitten.OtherwiseI’dbeupacreek.Thanksagainforpitchingin.”Hisexpressionturnedserious.“Iwantyoutoletmeknowifitgetstobetoomuchforyou,ifwe’retakingadvantage.”“Nottoworry.Ilove
havingJacksonwithme,”sheassuredherbrother-in-law.“Butitdoesn’tleavemuch
timefor...”Hisvoicetrailedoff.
“Forwhat?”sheasked,forcingasmile.“Mybusyscheduleofwatchingthegrassgrow?Mynonexistentsociallife?Pursuingmyexcitingcareerpath?”Atherundisguisedbitter
tone,worryimmediatelyspreadacrosshisface.“Carrie,areyouokay?Seriously?Doyouwanttotalkaboutanyofthis?Icanmaketime.”
“Absolutelynot.IthinkoneofthethingsIlovemostaboutwatchingthebabyisthathedoesn’taskquestionsIcan’tanswer.IhaveGrandpaMickdoingenoughofthat.AndMom.EvenCaitgetsinashotfromtimetotime.”“I’mhappytolisten,
though,”Noahsaid.“Beinganoutsider,Imightbeabletogiveyouadifferentperspective.”
“Noah,Iloveyouforwantingtohelp,butwe’retalkingabouttheO’Briens.Ihavesomanyperspectivesaboutmylife,myheadisspinning.I’llfigureitout,evenifit’snotontheirtimetable.”“Ofcourseyouwill,”he
saidwithconfidence.“I’llbebytogetJacksonlater.”“OrIcanbringhimback,”
sheoffered.“Whichever’s
easiestforyou.Justletmeknow.”AssoonasNoahhadgone,
shesatthebabybackdown,mixedsomeapplesauceintohiscerealandspooneditintohismouthatasteadyclip.Hegaveheratoothlesssmilethatalwayswarmedherheart.Today,thinkingofSusie’s
longingtohaveachildandherownfantasyaboutafamily,thatsmilemadeher
heartache.WhenwoulditbeSusie’sturn?Orhers?
***
Firstthinginthemorning,withBobbyupandeagerforthepromisedpancakes,Samdugoutsomewrinkledbutcleanclothesforhisnephew,thentookhimdowntotheinn’sdiningroom.TohissurprisehefoundMackand
SusieFranklininthefoyer.Susie’sgazeimmediatelylockedonBobbyandasmilespreadacrossherface.“Youmustbetheyoung
manI’vebeenhearingsomuchabout,”shetoldBobby.Bobbyregardedhershyly,
thenhidbehindSam.Samkneltdownanddrewtheboyupbesidehim.“Bobby,thisisMackFranklin.He’smybossatthenewspaper.Andthisis
hiswife,Mrs.Franklin.”“CallmeSusie,please,”
shesaid,hergazeneverleavingBobby.“WhenIcalledthis
morningtoseeifyou’dmadeitback,Jesstoldmeyougotinlastnight,”Macksaid.“Didthetripgookay?”“Itwassmoothenough.I
shouldhaveletyouknowwe’dmadeitbacktotown,”Samapologized.
“Absolutelynot.Youhadalottodotogetsettled,I’msure,”Macksaid.“Infact,Susieinsistedoncomingoverrightawaytoseewhatshecoulddotohelpout.”HegaveSamareassuringlook.“Thingsmustfeelprettyoverwhelmingaboutnow,butyou’renotinthisalone,okay?Iwanttomakesureyouknowthat.Weallwanttohelp.”
“Iappreciatethat,”Samsaid,beginningtoseewhatCarriehadbeentalkingabout.Eventhoughhewasnewtotownpeoplewerewillingtopitchin.Hehatedthatoneofthemhappenedtobehisboss,amanherespectedandwantedtoimpress.Hecouldn’thelpwonderingwhatMackthoughtofthechaosthathadsuddenlybecomehislife.
“I’mnotentirelysurewheretostart,”Samadmittedcandidly,thengrinnedatBobby’simpatienttugonhisjeans.“Excepttogetsomepancakesintomyboyhere.”“Yeah!”Bobbysaid.“Well,Icandefinitelyhelp
withthat,”Susiesaid.“I’llgointhekitchenandspeaktothechefmyself.”Bobbyregardedher
hopefully.“CanIcome,too?
Iwanttoseewheretheymakethepancakes.WhenIgetbig,Iwanttomakethemmyself.”“Absolutely,”Susieagreed
andheldoutherhand.SheturnedtoMack.“Whydon’tyougrabatablebythewindowsowecanseethewater?”AssheandBobbyleft,
Mackwatchedthemgowithasurprisinglyworried
expression.“Somethingwrong?”Sam
askedhimastheymadetheirwaytoatable.Mackshookoffwhatever
wastroublinghimandforcedasmile.“No,nothingforyoutoworryabout.Doyouneedmoretimeoff?LikeItoldyouwhenyoucalledtheotherday,Icanmanageforanotherweek.Imightnothavethecreative-designexpertiseyou
have,andIdefinitelydon’thaveyourtechskills,butIcanpoststoriesandpictures.”HeregardedSamwithconcern.“Youmusthavealistamilelongofthingsyouneedtodotoadjusttohavingcustodyofyournephew.”“Youhavenoidea,”Sam
said.“Thankgoodnessmysisterandbrother-in-lawhadtheforesighttohaveawill.Toomanyyoungcouples
thinkthey’reimmortal,accordingtothelawyer.Hesaysit’scriticaltoplanaheadwhentherearechildrentoconsider.Theyevenhadasmalllife-insurancepolicythatwillbesetasideforBobby’seducation.”Heshookhishead.“It’s
hardtoimaginemysisterbeingquitesoorganized.Neitheroneofusthoughtmuchbeyondournextmeal
whenwewerekids.”“Maybethat’swhy,”Mack
suggested.“Kidswhogrewupinachaotichouseholdoftenfeelthegreatestneedforasenseofstability.And,incaseyou’rewondering,Iknowthatfromexperience.”HegaveSamaruefullook.“Ofcourse,IhadtogothroughaplayboystageandacareercrisisbeforeIfiguredoutwhatIreallyneededand
gotmylifeontrack.”MaybeSamwasmorelike
Mackthanhe’drealized.Hecertainlyhadn’tchangeddramaticallyfromhisearlydaysofwantingtoseizewhateveradventurecamealongnext.Now,though?HeneededtofigureouthowtodothewholestablethinginahurryforBobby’ssake.“Maybethatexplainsit,”
hesaid,thoughhewasstill
skeptical.Shemighthavebossedhimaroundlikeamatureadult,butshe’dhadherownwildmomentsbeforeshe’dmarried.“IthinkitwasprobablyRobert’sdoing.Laurel’shusbandwasarealsteadyguy.Moneyinthebankeveryweekforthefuture,oilchangedinthecar,tiresrotatedorreplacedrightonschedule.Itwasironic,really,thatitwasafaultytire
blowingthatcausedtheircartospinoutofcontrolonabusyhighway.”“Thatjustshowsthatwe
can’talwaysplanforeverycurvelifemightthrowatus,”Macksaid.“I’msosorry,Sam.”Samnodded,unexpected
tearsoncemorethreatening.“Me,too,”hesaid,hisvoicechoked.Hesighedheavily,thenadded,“AllIknow
aboutthefutureisthatIneedtoenrollBobbyinschoolthismorning.Afterthat,Idon’thavearealplan.”“Schooldoesn’tstartfor
almostamonth,”Mackremindedhim.“There’snorush.WhynotwaitatleasttillMonday?Ifyouneedtohaveanypaperworkexpedited,I’msuresomeoneinthefamilywillbeabletohelp.Susie’scousinConnorisalawyer.
Andheruncle,MickO’Brien,cangetjustaboutanythingdonearoundherewithaphonecall.GiveBobbyafewdaystogetusedtobeinghere,lethimgetfamiliarwiththetown,meetafewkids.Giveyourselftimetogetyourfeetbackunderyou,too.”“Ijustthoughtmaybeifhe
wasenrolledinschoolandknewtherewasgoingtobeafamiliarroutine,he’dfeel
moresettled,”Samsaid.“I’mnotsurehequiteunderstandsthatthisishishomenow.HesaysalltherightwordsaboutknowingMommyandDaddyareinheaven,butIjusthavethissensehestillexpectsthemtofindtheirwaybacktohim.”“Thatmustkillyou,”Mack
said,thenhesitated.“Look,Imaythinkabreakbeforehehastothinkaboutanything
exceptbeingakidmightbegood,butrunitbySusie.She’ssmarteraboutthissortofthingthanIam.ItjustseemstomeBobby’salreadyhadtomakealotofbigadjustments.Acoupleofextradaystohangoutwithyoumightmakehimfeelmoresecure.Youguysprobablyneedsomeseriousbondingtime.”Samnodded.“Thatdoes
makesense.And,likeyousaid,maybeit’llhelpmetowrapmyheadaroundeverythingthat’shappened,too.”“Whataboutaplaceto
live?”Mackasked.“I’msureJesswillgiveyouabreakhere,ifyouneedtostayonforawhilelonger.”“Shementionedthatwhen
Igotbacklastnight,”Samresponded.“Butas
convenientandwonderfulastheinnis,it’snotalong-termsolution.ThesoonerIcanfindapermanentplaceforus,thebetteritwillbe.”“Icanhelpwiththat,”
Susiesaid,returningjustintimetooverhear.“Iknoweverypropertyintownthat’savailableforrentorforsale.Anypreference?”“I’dplannedtorentasmall
apartment,ifthereissucha
thinginChesapeakeShores,butnow...”Hisvoicetrailedoffandheshrugged.“Bobbyneedsstability,somaybeahouse.”“Iagree,”Susiesaid
enthusiastically.“AndIalreadyknowtheperfectone.It’snottoobigandit’sonWillowBrookRoad,whichisawonderfulstreetwithlotsofshadetreesandniceyards.Thereareseveralchildren
Bobby’sageonthestreet,andalotofthekidsinourfamilyareovertherealot,too.Mycousin’sdaughterlivesthereandshewatchesthemafterschoolfromtimetotime.”“Carrie?”Samasked.Astartledlookpassed
acrossSusie’sface.“Howonearthdidyouknowthat?”“Iranintoherlastnight
whenIwaspickingupdinner
atO’Brien’s.Shementionedshehaschildreninandoutallthetime.”“It’snotaformaldaycare
oranythinglikethat,”Susieexplained.“Carriejusthappenstobereallygoodwithchildren,soalltheO’Brienlittleonesgravitatetoher.Theadultstaketerribleadvantageofthat.Ithinkweallknowthatsoonerorlatershe’lldecideonanewcareer
andgobacktotheglamorouslifesheusedtolive,butinthemeantime,she’sagodsend.”ThementionofCarrie’s
previouslyglamorouslifesetoffalarmsforSam.Itonlyconfirmedwhathe’dguessedthepreviousnightjustlookingatherinanoutfitevenhecouldtellhadn’tcomeoffarackatadiscountstore.Hadn’thealreadyexperiencedonedisastrous
relationshipthatendedbecausehe’dratherspendhismoneyonadventuresthanclothes?MaybeCarrieWinters,despiteherthoughtfuloffer,wasn’tthebestpersontobringintoBobby’slife...orhis,especiallyifherfutureinChesapeakeShoreswasasuncertainasSusiehadjustsuggested.Bobbydidn’tneedtoformanattachmentto
anotherpersonwhomightdisappearfromhislifeatanymoment.Hehesitatedabouteven
consideringahousejustdownthestreetfromCarrie.Itseemedlikeareallybadidea.ButlookingintoSusie’sexpectantface,heknewhecouldn’taffordtoignoreahousewithrealpotential,especiallyinatownwherehealreadyknewrealestatecame
atapremiumandwasinshortsupply.“Sure,let’stakealook,”he
said.“I’llgiveyouacallandwecansetitup.”“Youdon’twanttolook
thismorning?Ihavetime.”“Don’tpush,”Macksaid
quietly.“Samhasalottodo.”“Anythingmoreimportant
thanthis?”Susieasked,hervoicetight.WithMack’ssteadygaze
holdinghers,shefinallybackeddown.ShereachedinherpurseandhandedSamabusinesscard.“Callmewheneveryou’reready.Buthousesdon’tstayonthemarketlonghere,”shecautioned.Samnodded,thenturnedto
Bobby,notingthathewasmakingslowbutsteadyprogressthroughastackofpancakesmoresuitedto
Sam’sappetitethanaboy’s.“Youdoingokay,buddy?”Bobbynoddedhappily,his
mouthfull.Whenhe’dswallowed,hetookabiggulpofmilkandsaid,“Youwereright,Sam.Thesearethebest,evenbetterthanMom’s.”Asifhe’dsuddenly
realizedwhathesaid,hissmilefaded.“IsitokaythatIlikethem?”hewhispered.“It
won’tmakeMommad,willit?”“Noway,”Samsaid.
“Yourmomonlywantedtheverybestforyoualways,whetheritwaspancakesor...”HesearchedhismindforsomethingsufficientlyyuckytoappealtoBobby’ssenseoftheridiculous.Hegrinned.“Orescargots.”Bobbywrinkledhisnose.
“What’sthat?”heasked
suspiciously.“Snails,”Samtoldhim.WithSusieandMack
fightingsmiles,Bobbymadeagaggingsound.“Momwouldnevermakemeeatsnails.”HegaveSamawarylook.“You’renotgonna,either,areyou?”“Theyareconsidereda
delicacy,”Samtoldhim.Bobby’sjawset
stubbornly.“Idon’tcare.I’m
noteatingthem.”Samlaughedandruffled
hishair.“Okay.Goodtoknowwhereyoudrawthelinewhenitcomestofood.Nosnails.”“Nosnails,”Bobby
repeatedfervently.Hebouncedinhisseat.“Whatarewegonnadotoday?”SamglancedatMack,then
backathissuddenlyeagernephew.“IthoughtI’dplay
hookyandwecouldcheckouttheshopsonMainStreet,maybespendsometimeonthebeachorswiminthepool.AndIthinkIsawaplaygroundonthetowngreen.Wouldyouliketocheckthatout?”“Allright!”Bobbysaid
withafistpumpthathadeveryoneatthetablesmiling.Sambreathedinasighof
relief.Finally,afterdaysof
awkward,disapprovingsilencesanddifficultchoicesthathadBobbyshiftingfromtantrumstooutrightrebellions,itseemedSamhadgottensomethingexactlyright.Unfortunately,itwasmostlythankstoMack’sinstinctsandnothisown.
***
EvenaftergivingJacksona
bathanddressinghimincleanclothesafterthecerealdebacle,CarriediscovereditwasstillsurprisinglypleasantforamorninginearlyAugust.Ratherthanpushinghisstrollerstraightovertoherhouse,sheheadedforMainStreetandthenShoreRoad.HerfirststopwasGrandma
Megan’sartgallery,whichwascurrentlyshowinganexhibitionofMoira’slocal
photographs,manyofthemtakenofO’Brienchildren,aswellasotherChesapeakeShoresresidents.Luke’swifehadbecomeasurprisinglysuccessfulphotographerthankstoMegan’scontactsintheNewYorkartworld.OutofloyaltytoMegan,Moiraalwaysinsistedonashowhereintowninlatesummer.Ithadtheaddedadvantageofgivingherasolidstretchof
timeathomewithLuke.WhenGrandmaMegan
spottedCarriewiththebaby,sherushedovertoholdopenthedoor.“There’smyprecious
boy,”shecooed,leaningdowntoscoopJacksonoutofthestroller.“I’mdelightedtoseeyou,
too,”Carriesaid,amusedbyhergrandmother’scompletelackofinterestinanything
otherthanherfirstgreat-grandchild.Meganglancedupather.
“Ifussedoveryoufromthedayyouwereborn.It’sJackson’sturnnow.”Shebouncedthebabyinherarms.“You’realmosttoobigformetohold.”“I’dsuggestyounot
bouncehimquitesoenergetically,”Carriecautioned.“He’sjustfinished
hisbreakfast.”“Itwouldn’tbethefirst
timesomeoneinthisfamilyspitupalloveroneofus,”Megansaiddismissively.“Didn’tyoubuythatscarf
inPariswhenyouandGrandpaMickwentthereforyoursecondhoneymoon?”Carrieasked.“Isn’tityourfavorite?”Hergrandmotherglanced
downandshrugged.“I’lljust
makeyourgrandfathertakemebacktobuyanotherone.”“Andhe’ddoitwithout
battinganeye,wouldn’the?”Carriesaid,envyingthemthedevotionthey’dfoundtogetherthesecondtimearound.Apparentlysomethingin
hervoicealertedMeganthatCarriewasinanoddmood.ShereturnedJacksontohisstrollerwithalittlepat,then
turnedtoCarrie,givingherthefullattentionshe’dapparentlyconcludedwasrequired.“Wouldyoucareforsometea?It’sIrishBreakfasttea,Nell’sfavorite.”“Weshouldbegoing.
You’reprobablybusy.”“I’mnevertoobusyfora
visitwithyou.Sit.I’llgetthetea.”Whenshecameback,
Carriewaspushingthe
strollerbackandforthandwatchingJacksonfightsleep.“Here’syourtea,”Megan
said,handingherthedelicate,old-fashionedchintz-patternedteacup.“Nowtellmewhat’sonyourmind.”“I’matlooseends,”Carrie
admitted.“Nonewsthere,”her
grandmotheragreed.“Anythoughtsaboutwhatyouintendtodoaboutit?”She
gaveheraslylook.“Otherthanavoidingadvicefromyourgrandfather,thatis?”Carriegrinned.“How’d
youguess?”“Thewayyoutookoff
fromthepubasifyoudidn’thearhimcallingafteryoulastnight,”Megansaid.“Andthefactthatyou’reinhererightnow,ratherthaninyourownhousewhereyoucouldputthebabydownforhisnap.”
“YouknowhowGrandpaMickis,”Carriesaid.“Imostcertainlydo,”
Meganreplied.“Thatsaid,notallofhisideasshouldbedismissedsoreadily.”“ButIneedtofindmyown
ideas,”Carrieargued.“Isn’tthatthewholepointofgrowingup,tofigureoutwhatwe’remeanttodo?Youdidn’texactlyhaveahandleonit,didyou?Youwerehow
oldandhadfivekidsathome,whenyoudecideditwasn’tenough,divorcedGrandpaMick,movedtoNewYorkanddiscoveredhowmuchyoulovedartandworkinginagallery?”“Touché,”hergrandmother
said.“Buttherewasalittlemoretothedivorcethanmyrunningofftofindmyself.”“Iknowthat.Itwas
becauseGrandpaMickwasa
workaholicandyoufeltlikehe’dabandonedyoutobeasinglemom,stuckathomewithfivekids.”Megansmiledatwhateven
Carrieknewtobeasimplisticversionofaverydifficulttimeinhergrandparents’marriage.“Thatdoessumitup,”
Meganacknowledged.“Oratleasttheheartofwhathappened.Here’sthe
differencebetweenyouandme.Ididn’tknowjusthowunhappyIwasforaverylongtime,andIhurtalotofpeoplewhenItookoff,includingyourmotherandyourauntsanduncles.I’vespentalotoftimemakingamendsforthat.Youhavetheadvantageofbeingonyourown.Now’stheperfecttimeforyoutogetseriousaboutfindingyourdream.Tomake
yourmistakeswhentheonlypersonlikelytobehurtisyou.”Carriemethersympathetic
gaze.“You’retalkingaboutMarc.”“Notexactly.I’mtalking
aboutwhatyoudidtoyourself.Youworkedyourselfintoexhaustiontoimpressamanwhodidn’tappreciateit,”Megancorrected.“Thegoodnewsis
thatyouhadsenseenoughtoleavebeforeyouweretrappedbyamarriagethatwasdoomed.”Carrierolledhereyes.
“Trustme,marriagewasneveronthetable,exceptmaybeinmyfantasy.Marchadanentirelydifferentagenda.Hewasaselfish,manipulativemanwhotookadvantageofthefeelingsheknewIhadforhim.Icansee
thatnow.”“Goodforyou!Youwon’t
makeasimilarmistakeagain,willyou?”“Isurehopenot.”Hergrandmotherstudied
herworriedly.“You’renotgoingtoletthatonemistakekeepyoufromtakingrisksoropeningyourheartagain,areyou?Becausethatwouldbearealtragedy.Youhavesomuchpotential,Carrie,so
muchlovetogive.”“ButIneedapurpose,”
Carrietoldher.“GrandpaMickhasbeenharpingonthateversinceIleftEurope.”“Andhe’sright.Everyone
needsapurpose,apassionthatmakesthemwanttogetupinthemorning.”“SoyouthinkI’mwasting
time,too?”“No,Ithinkyou’retaking
yourtimetryingtoavoid
anothermistake.That’snotyou.You’remyimpulsive,embrace-everythinggranddaughter,butsuddenlyyou’rescared.Ithinkthat’swhatIhatemostaboutMarcReynolds.Herobbedyouofthatwonderful,spontaneousspiritthatmadeyouspecial.IfImayofferonepieceofadvice,it’sthis.Starttakingchancesagain,Carrie.Ifsomethingfeelsright,tryit.If
someonefeelsright,openyourheart.”“Maybeyou’reright,”
Carrieacknowledged.“MaybeIhavebeenplayingitsafe.”Shegavehergrandmother
aplaintivelook.“OrmaybeIsimplyhavenoideawheretogofromhere.”Hergrandmotherwrapped
herinatightembrace.“You’llknowitwhenit
comesalong.Inthemeantime,I’lltrytogetyourgrandfathertogiveyousomespace.”Carrielaughed.“Thanks
fortheoffer,butwebothknowthat’salosingfight.I’lljusttunehimout.”Shetriedtoimaginehow
wellthatwouldworkandcouldn’t.“I’dbettergetJacksonhome.He’llbeawakeagainanyminuteand
hetendstowakeupcranky.Wedon’twanthimscaringoffyourcustomers.”“Wednesdaysareusually
slow.I’mnotworried.I’mgladyoucameby,sweetheart.”“Me,too.Loveyou.”Surprisingly,thoughthere
hadbeennosuddenburstsofinspirationduringtheirconversation,Carriefeltatpeacewhensheleft.That
lastedtwowholeblocksuntilshespottedSamWinslowsittingonabenchbytheplayground,andhisnephewheadingstraightforthetoprungsofthejunglegym.Carrie’sbreathcaughtin
herthroatasshepushedthestrollerasfastasshecouldintheirdirection.Shedidn’tdarecalloutforfeartheboywouldtakeamisstepandtumblestraighttotheground.
Withhereyesgluedtotheboy,shemadeittothebaseofthejunglegymandstoodtherewatchinghiseverymove,readytocatchhimifhefell.ShesensedSam’s
approach,butneverlookedaway.“Whatwereyouthinking?”
shesaidinaquietvoice.“Didyouhaveanyideawhathewasdoing?”
“OfcourseIdid,”Samsaiddefensively,hiswelcomingsmileimmediatelyfading.“I’mnotcompletelyincompetent.Bobby’sbeenclimbingjunglegymssincehewasfour.He’salittledaredevil.”Heleveledalookather.
“Don’tbelieveme?”Hewhippedouthiscellphoneandshowedherapictureofatriumphantlittleboyatop
anotherjunglegymwithawomanwhowasclearlyhismomstandingwatchjustbelow,atremuloussmileonherlips.“Yoursister?”Carrie
asked.Samnodded.“Shelooksterrified.”“Butshelethimdoit,”
Sampointedout.“Thedifferenceisshewas
standingrightbelowincase
hefell.”“AndIwassittingafew
feetaway.Imayhavelookeddistractedtoyou,buttrustme,Isawhiseverymove.AndyousawfirsthandhowquicklyIgotoverherewhenyouturnedup.”“Isuppose.”“Carrie,Imaybenewat
this,butI’mnotgoingtoletanythinghappentoBobby.Mysistertrustedmetogetit
right,andIwill.”Shelookedintohiseyes
thenandheardthesinceritybehindhiswords.“ThenIshouldrelaxandleaveyoutoit.”“Oryoucouldgotothe
caféwithus.IpromisedBobbyamilkshakeandagrilledcheesesandwichforlunch.”Shewasalittletootempted
bytheinvitation.“Ishould
probablygetJacksonhome.”Samlookedatthesleeping
babyandsmiled.“Isthisyournephew?”“TheoneandonlyJackson
McIlroy,”sheconfirmed.“Hisdad’sthedoctorintown.Withanadventurouskidinyourlife,you’llwanttogettoknowhim.”“Absolutely,”Samsaid.
“Now,aboutlunch.Howaboutit?Youcangrumble
thatnothingI’mfeedingBobbyishealthy.”Carrielaughedandthought
aboutwhathergrandmotherhadjustadvised,openingherhearttonewexperiences,evenifshewasn’tquitereadyforanewman.“Well,whenyouputitthat
way,itshouldbefun,”shesaid.“MaybeI’llevenletyouholdthebaby,ifhewakesupcrying.Thatcouldbeeven
moreentertaining.”“Hey,I’mbarelyholding
myheadabovewaterasitis.Onekidatatime,okay?”“Okay,”sherelented.“I’ll
gosaveatable.It’sgoingtobehoppingintheresoon.”Evenasshewalkedaway,
sheheardhimtryingtopersuadeBobbytoclimbdown.Theboypromptlyrefused.“Don’tmakemecomeup
thereafteryou,”Samwarned.Asmuchasshewantedto
turnaroundandwatchthetestofwillsplayout,shekeptgoingtoSally’s.Lunchpromisedtobeoneofthoseinterestingadventuresthathadbeeninshortsupplyrecently.
5
“Twiceinoneday?”SallycommentedwhenCarriewalkedintothecafé.“TowhatdoIowethehonor?”“I’mmeetingafriend.At
leastIamifhecangethisnephewtoleavetheplayground.”
“Ah,youmustbetalkingaboutSam,”Sallysaid,provinghowefficienttheChesapeakeShoresgrapevinecouldbe.“Iheardaboutwhathappened,thatoutoftheblue,he’sgothisnephewtoraise.”Sheshookherhead.“Poorlittlething.Hemustbefeelingsolostwithouthismomanddad.AndSammustbefeelingcompletelyoutofhisdepth.YouruncleKevin
wouldknowwhatthatwaslike.”Carrieimmediatelysatupa
littlestraighter.“Whydidn’tIthinkofthat?UncleKevinsuddenlyfoundhimselfasingledadwhenGeorgiawaskilled.ThewholefamilypitchedinwithDaveyuntilKevingothisfeetbackunderhim.IshouldarrangeforSamtomeethim.”Sallygaveheralonglook.
“Howdidthisbecomeyourproblem?”“Itoldyou.Sam’sa
friend.”“Ithoughthewasnewto
town.”“Okay,wejustmet,buthe
obviouslyneedshelp.Kevincangivehimsomeencouragement,tellhimhewon’tfeelasifhe’sflounderingforlong,”Carriesaid,warmingtotheidea.
“LookatKevin’slifenow.He’smarriedtoShanna.TheyhaveDavey,andanadoptedson,Henry,andtwokidsoftheirown.”“Youplanningtostepin
andbethisman’sShanna?”Sallyasked,asparkofdevilmentinhereyes.Carrie’sjawdroppedatthe
question.“No,ofcoursenot.I’mjustbeingneighborly.”Sallylookeddoubtful.
“Keeptellingyourselfthat.Youwantyourusualtodrink—anicedtea?”Carrieshookherhead,
determinednottobesopredictable.Maybeitwassilly,butshevieweditasafirststeptowardgettingmorespontaneitybackintoherlifejustasGrandmaMeganhadadvised.She’dbeenright.Playingitsafewasn’tCarrie’sway.
“IthinkI’llgocrazyandhaveanothercupofcoffee,”sheannouncedwithagreatersenseoftriumphthanthedecisiondeserved.Sallynoddedandwentto
greetagroupoftouristswho’djusttakenovertwotablesinthemiddleoftheroom,usinghalfthechairsforalltheirpackages.ClearlytheirvisithadbeengoodfortheChesapeakeShores
economy.JustthenSamcameinthe
door,afirmhandonhisnephew’sshoulder.TheboyworeamutinousexpressionasSamguidedhimtotheboothwhereCarriewaswaiting.“Carrie,thisisBobby.
Bobby,CarrieistheniceladywhohelpedmedecideonthatdeliciousIrishstewwehadfordinnerlastnight.”
Ignoringbothherandhisuncle,Bobbycrawledacrosstheseatandsettledinacornerofthebooth,armsfoldedacrosshischest,hisgazedowncast.“Sorry,”Sammouthed.Carriedebatedherstrategy,
thenoptedtobedirect,actingasifBobbyweren’tsodeterminedtopunishSamandpretendshedidn’texist.“Isawyouclimbthat
junglegymontheplaygroundjustnow,”shesaid,hertonecheerful.Bobbygaveherasurprised
look,butremainedstubbornlysilent.Carriewasundaunted.
“Youwerereallyhigh.Youmustbeverybrave.Howoldareyou?”ShesawSamstartto
answerforhim,andshookherhead.Hesatbackand
waited.“IthinkIwasaboutyour
agewhenmytwinsisterandIclimbedupontherailingontheporchatmygrandfather’shouseandtriedtowalkitlikeatightrope,”shecontinuedasifhe’dresponded.“Itwasprettyscary,butfun,too.Atleasttillourmomcaughtus.”Bobbyfinallymether
gaze,afaintinterestsparkinginhiseyes.“Wasitvery
high?”“Notashighasthejungle
gym,butprettyhigh.”“Iliketoclimbstuff,”he
said.“AndInevergetscared.”“That’sgreat,butit’s
importanttounderstandthatsomethingshaverisks.Youdon’twanttodoanythingthatmightbedangerous.Abrokenarmorlegwouldn’tbemuchfun.”
Bobbyshrugged.“MyfriendPetehadacastonhisarm.Hesaidititched.Andtherewerelotsofthingshecouldn’tdoforalongtime.”“Somethingtoremember,”
Carriesuggested.“Iheardyoumightwantagrilledcheesesandwichforlunch.That’smyfavorite,too.Sally’sarethebest.”Curiosityfinallyovercame
hisbadmood.“Isthatthe
ladywhoownsthisplace?”Carrienodded.“Andhere’s
anothertip.Ifyou’renicetoher,shesometimeshascookiesstillwarmfromtheovenforherbest-behavedcustomers.”Bobby’seyeswidened.
“Chocolatechip,likewehadlastnight?”“Evenbetter,”Carriesaid,
prayingNellwouldforgiveherifsheeverheardabout
thattraitorousclaim.“Ithinkyou’vesaidthe
magicwords,”Samsaid.“BobbyandIarebothsuckersforwarmchocolate-chipcookies.”“Icaneatlotsandlotsof
them,”Bobbyagreed.“Butonlyafterlunch,”
SamremindedhimjustasSallyarrivedtotaketheirordersfortwogrilledcheesesandwiches,aburgerforSam
andanorderoffriesforthetable.Clearlymoreateasenow,
BobbyglancedacrossthetableandstudiedJacksoninhiscarrier.“Isthatyourbaby?”“No,Jacksonismy
nephew.Hestayswithmesometimes.”“LikeI’mstayingwith
Sam?”“Notexactly,”Carriesaid.
“Hegoeshometohisdadatnight.Hisdad’sadoctorhereintownandhismomisinschoolinBaltimore.”Bobbylookedpuzzled.“If
she’samom,isn’tshetoooldforschool?”Carriesmiled.“Thisisa
specialschoolforpeoplelearningtobedoctors.”“Isshegonnagiveshots?”“Iimagineso.”Hegaveanexaggerated
shudder.“Idon’tlikeshots.”“Mostpeopledon’t,”
Carrieagreed.“ButIhappentoknowthatJackson’sdadgivesshotsthatyoubarelyevennotice.”“Didhegiveonetoyou?”“Morethanone.Iwas
goingonatripandneededseveralbeforeIwent.”Bobbyshookhishead.“I’d
havestayedhome.”“Andmissedoutonabig
adventure?”Carriesaid.“Ithoughtitwasworthit.”“Wheredidyougo?”Sam
asked.“Africa.Mygrandfather
hastakenonthetaskofdesigningandbuildingmedicalfacilitiesforseveralsmallvillages,somethingthat’sincreasinglycriticalwithalloftheoutbreaksofEbolathathavebeenoccurringinthatpartofthe
world.Iwentwithhimandmygrandmothertotalktothepeopleandseewhattheyneeded.Whilehedidhisthing,weworkedwiththewomeninthevillagestohelpwiththeirEnglishandteachthemsomepreventativecarefortheirbabies.”“That’simpressive.Are
youinvolvedinhisworkonaregularbasis?”“Notreally.Helpingin
underservedvillagesismysister’spassion.It’sthereasonshe’sstudyingtobeadoctor.Andthetripwasmygrandfather’swayoftryingtomotivatemetogetonwithmylife.”“Whatdoyoudonow,
asidefromtakingcareofyournephew?”Samasked.“Notmuch,”shesaid
candidly.“Andthat’stheproblem.”Reliefwashedover
herwhenshesawSallycomingwiththeirfood.“Here’sourlunch.”ShestoleaFrenchfryfrom
theplatetheminuteitwasonthetable,avoidingSam’scuriousgaze.Sheglancedhiswayagainandrealizedshe’dbeenwrong.Itwasn’tcuriosityonhisface.Hisexpressionhadactuallyshutdownasifhedisapprovedofherglibresponse.
Okay,maybeherlifewasabitofadisorganized,unplannedmessatthemoment,butwhowashetojudge?Asshefocusedherattentiononhermeal,itdawnedonherhowannoyingsnapjudgmentscouldbe.PerhapsthatwasexactlyhowSamhadfeltearliertodayandlastnight,whenshe’dbeenjudginghim.Maybeshe’dbeenalittle
prematureintellingSallytheywerefriends.Theywere,atbest,distrustfulacquaintances.Withsurprisingregret,sherealizedshedidn’tseethatchanginganytimesoon.
***
ExceptforCarrie’sabilitytocoaxBobbyoutofhisstonysilence,lunchhadpretty
muchbeenadisaster,Samdecidedasheheadedbacktotheinnwithhischatteringnephewathisside.Hecouldn’texactlyponderwhathadgonewrong,though,withBobbyaskingamillionandonequestionsaboutthetown,thebayandeverybirdtheysaw.Sam’sanswerswereinshortsupply.Whoknewasix-year-oldcouldbesobrightandinquisitive?
“Whydon’twelookforsomebooksaboutallthatthenexttimewe’reintown?”hesuggestedatlast.“Wecouldgobacknow,”
Bobbysaid,gazingupathimhopefully.“Isawabookstorerightnexttowhereweate.”“Areyousureyoudon’t
wanttotakeanap?”“Idon’ttakenaps,”Bobby
scoffed.“I’mtoobig.”Samsighed.“Okay,then.
Let’sgoback.”ThiswasSam’sfirstvisit
tothebookstore.Hewassurprisedbyhowextensivetheselectionappearedtobe.Itevenhadacozylittlecoffeearea.Bobbyimmediately
gravitatedtowardthechildren’ssection,wherebookshadbeenleftscatteredaroundandchild-sizefurnitureinvitedkidstosit
andlookatthebooksorplaywiththebook-themedtoys.Clearlytheownerunderstoodalotaboutchildren.Itwasanatmospherethatinvitedcuriosityandexploration,ratherthanonethatsaidHandsOff!Awomanemergedfrom
thebackandbeamed,firstatBobby,thenathim.“Hi,I’mShannaO’Brien,”shesaid,holdingoutherhandtoSam.
“Andyou’rethenewwebdesignerworkingwithMack.”Samblinked,astounded
notonlybyherperceptiveness,butbyherlastname.“Excusemeforlettingmyjawdrop,”hesaid.“ButI’mbeginningtothinkO’Briensareeverywhere,”Shelaughed.“Prettymuch,
andwithallthebabiesinthenextgeneration,Idon’tsee
thatchanging.”“HowdidyouknowwhoI
am?”“IranovertoSally’sahalf
houragotopickupasandwich.IspottedyouwithCarrieandthislittleguy.Itdidn’ttakelongtoputtwoandtwotogether.Wehaveverygoodmathskillsinthistown,atleastwhenitcomestothatsortofthing.”“I’dbetterrememberthat,”
hesaid,notsurehowhefeltaboutsomanypeople,nomatterhowwell-intentioned,knowinghisbusiness.Shannahadgonetokneel
downnexttoBobby.“So,whatkindofbooksdoyoulike?”“Allkinds,”Bobbysaid.
“Mymomreadtomeeverynightbeforebed.”HeglancedupatSam,hisexpressionsad.“Willyoudothat?Ipacked
someofmyfavorites,butIlikenewstories,too.”“Absolutely,”Samsaid
readily,gratefultogetahandleonsomethinghewascapableofdoingtomakeBobby’stransitiontothisnewlifeatinybiteasier.“Youpickoutwhateverbooksyouwantandwe’llreadthemtogether.”Lookingrelieved,Bobby
turnedbacktoShanna.“Do
youhavebooksaboutthebayandthebirdsaroundhere?”“Isuredo,”shesaid,
pullingseveraloffashelf.“Therearealotmore,butthey’reforgrown-ups.Ifyouwanttoknowmorewhenyou’vebeenthroughthese,comebackandwe’llseeifoneofthoseappealstoyou.”SheglancedatSam.“I’mabigbelieverinencouragingchildrentoreadabout
whateverintereststhem,evenifthebooksweremeantforadults.Theymightstumbleoversomeofthewords,butitkeepstheminterested.”Bobbywasalready
engrossedinapicturebookaboutlocalshorebirds,sosheturnedherattentionbacktoSam.“I’mtryingtoconvinceThomasO’Brientostartasummerclassfortheyoungerkidsintown.Healreadyhas
anactivegroupatthehighschool,butinmyopinionchildrenarenevertooyoungtodevelopapassionfortheworldrightaroundthem.Thomasrunsthefoundationtopreservethebay,andI’vetoldhimthebestwaytoassurethatthebaygoesonbeingprotectedistosparkinterestatanearlyage.DoyouthinkBobbywouldliketojoin?”
Samglanceddownathisnephewandsmiled.“Ithinkthat’syouranswer.He’stheonewhoinsistedwecomeintodayandfindthesebooks,andwejustarrivedbackintownlastnight.”“Thomasandmyhusband
willbethrilledaboutthatenthusiasm.Kevin—andyes,he’sanO’Brien,oneofMick’ssons,infact—workswithThomas.Betweenuswe
havethreeboysandagirl,ranginginagefromafewmonthstoseventeen.We’llhavetohavethetwoofyouoverfordinner,soBobbycanmakesomenewfriends.”“Thatwouldbegreat,”
Samsaid,likingthisopen,generouswomanatonce.“ShouldIinviteCarrie,
too?”sheaskedslyly.Heblinkedatthe
obviousnessofthequestion.
“Uptoyou,”hesaid.“It’syourdinner.”Shegaveanodof
satisfaction.“I’lltakethatasayes.Nowletmeringupthosebooks,unlessyouwanttolookaroundforsomeforyourself.”“IthinkI’mgoingtobe
spendingallmysparetimereadingthesewithBobby,”hesaid.“I’llfindsomeformyselfthenexttimewecome
in.”“Anyparticulargenre?”“Adventuretravel,”he
suggested.Bookswereprobablytheonlywayhewasgoingtosatisfyhiswanderlustfortheforeseeablefuture.“You’reinluck.Ihavea
greatselection.Thereareafewotherpeopleintownwhohavethetimeandmoneytotravel,soItrytoorderthe
latestbooksforthem.”“Youmustgettoknow
yourcustomersreallywell,”Samsaid,impressed.“It’stheonlywayfora
small,independentbookstoretosucceedthesedays,”shesaid.Whentheirpurchaseswere
paidforandbaggedintwoseparatebagssoBobbycouldcarryacouplehimself,shegaveSamanothersmile.“I’ll
beintouchaboutdinner.Probablyonenightnextweek.IknowTuesdayisdeadlinenightatthepaper,soI’llaimforWednesdayorThursday.”“Great,”Samsaid.OutsideBobbywas
practicallyskippingacrossthestreetinexcitement.“Canwereadwhenwegetbacktotheinn?”“Wouldyouratherdothat
thanswim?”Samasked,surprised.“Uh-huh,”Bobbysaidwith
anod.“IalwayslikeditwhenMommyreadtome.”“Thenthat’swhatwe’ll
do,”Samsaid.Heheldouthishand.“Holdmyhandwhenwecrossthestreet,buddy.”Bobbytuckedhishand
trustinglyintoSam’s,thengavehimashylook.“Ithink
maybebeinghereisgoingtobeokay.”Thesoftlyspoken
commentbroughtthestingoftearstoSam’seyes.Hewasgladforthesunglassesthatkeptthosetearsfromhisnephew.“Iknowit’sgoingtobeokay,Bobby,”hesaid,histonemorereassuringthanitmighthavebeeneventwenty-fourhoursearlier.“We’regoingtobeateam,youand
me.”Bobbygrinned.“Ilike
beingonateam.DoyouthinktheyhaveT-ballhere?”“Iimaginetheydo.”“CanIplay?”“Ifyouwantto.”“Willyoucometothe
gameslikeDaddydid?”“Youbet.”Samstudiedthesatisfied
expressiononhisnephew’sfaceandrealizedturninginto
adadwasn’tgoingtobequiteasterrifyingashe’dimagined.Bobbywasalreadyshowinghimtheway.
***
Jacksonwasdownforhisafternoonnap,thoughhowhecouldsleepwithDaveyandHenryfightingoveravideogameinthelivingroomwasbeyondCarrie.
“Hey,youtwo,alittlequieter,please.Thebaby’ssleeping.”“Oops,”Henrysaid,his
expressionimmediatelyturningserious.“Shouldn’tyouhave
outgrownthiscompetitivethingwithyouryoungerbrotherbynow?”sheteased.“You’reonlyayearawayfromgoingtocollege.”Hegrinned.“I’mjust
warmingupforcollege,”heinformedher.“Ihearitgetsprettywildandcompetitiveinthedormsandfraternityhouses.”“Whateverhappenedtothe
sweet,seriouslittleboywhofirstcametotowntolivewithShanna?”Carrieasked,rememberinghisarrivaleventhoughshe’dbeenjustafewyearsolder.“Igotturnedintoan
O’Brien,”hesaid,thengaveheratauntinglook.“Youwanttoplay?”Davey’seyeslitup.“Yeah,
Carrie,takehimdown,okay?”“I’mnogoodatthis
game,”sheprotestedinnocently.“Youbothknowthat.”Still,shesatdownandtookDavey’sremote.“Don’tbetoohardonme,okay,Henry?”
Fifteenminuteslater,she’dwipedthefloorwiththesmugteenager,provingheandDaveyweren’ttheonlycompetitivepeopleintheroom.Daveyhooted.Henry’sgazenarrowed
suspiciously.“Haveyoubeenpracticingbehindourbacks?”“Itismygameinmy
house,”shetoldhim.“Whatdidyouthink,thatI’dletyougoontrouncingme?”
Henrylaughed.“Iwashoping.Ineedsomebodyaroundtokeepmyconfidencehigh.UncleConnorsuredoesn’tletmewinandevenDavey’sgettingtobemorethanIcanhandle.IguessI’llhavetostartplayingwiththebabiesifIwantasurefirewin.”“Arethereanymoreof
thosecookies,Carrie?”Daveyasked.“I’dlikea
couplefortheroad.Weneedtogethomefordinner.”Shegavehimasternlook.
“WhichisexactlywhyI’mnotgivingyoumorecookies.Idon’twantyourmomordadoverhereyellingatmeaboutspoilingyourappetites.”Justthenherphonerang
andshespottedShanna’snameonthecallerID.“Speakofthedevil.”“IsthatMom?”Davey
asked.Carrienodded.“Thenwe’dbettermove,”
Henrysaid,leaningdowntogiveherakissonthecheek.“Bye,Carrie.Seeyou.”“Seeyou,”Daveysaid,
boundingoutthedooraheadofhisbigbrother.Carriesighedandanswered
thephone.“Yourboysareheadinghomerightnow.”“Goodtoknow,”Shanna
said.“Butthat’snotwhyIcalled.”“Oh?What’sup?”“Areyoufreefordinner
nextWednesdayorThursday?”“Sure,eitherone,”Carrie
saidwithoutbotheringtocheckhercalendar.“It’snotasifIhavealotofcommitmentsthesedays.Anythingspecialgoingon?”“Notreally.Wejust
haven’tseenenoughofyoulately,”Shannasaid.Thecommentwasso
completelyuntrueitwaslaughable.“Isawyouthismorning,”Carrieremindedher.“AndHenryandDaveyjustleftmyhouse.IseeallofyouatSundaydinneratGrandpaMick’s.What’sthisreallyabout?Anddon’tfib.You’renogoodatit.”“IinvitedSamWinslow
andhisnephewfordinner,”Shannaadmitted.“Oh,boy,”Carrie
whispered.“Ifyou’retryingtodosomematchmaking,quitit.SamandIhavesomeissues.”“NotthatIcouldseeat
lunchtoday,”Shannaargued.“ItwasquitethelittlefamilysceneinSally’s.”“Yousawus?”“OfcourseIdid.Ifitwas
supposedtobeasecretrendezvous,itmighthavebeenbettertohaveitsomeplacemoresecludedandminusthekids.”“Youaresofaroffbase,”
Carrietoldher.“ThereisnothingatallbetweenSamandme.There’snotlikelytobe,either.I’mnotcrazyaboutsomeofthedecisionshe’sbeenmakingaboutBobbyandhedoesn’tseemallthat
crazyaboutme,period.Letthisgo,Shanna.I’mgladyouinvitedhimover.EarliertodayIwasthinkingheandKevinmighthavealotincommon,givenhowabruptlytheybothbecamesingledads.Trustme,though.You’llhaveamuchbettertimewithoutmethere.”“IalreadytoldhimIwas
invitingyou.”ThatgaveCarriepause.
“Andhedidn’timmediatelycomeupwithanexcusetoavoidthewholething?”“Nope.Helookedmore
likeamanwhowashappysomeonewassteppingintopushthetwoofyoutogetheragain.”“Iseriouslydoubtthat.”Shannawassurprisingly
silentforaboutaminute.“Youknow,Itakeitback,”shesaid.
Carriewasstartledbythesuddenturnaround.Shedidn’tlikethedisappointmentthatimmediatelyspreadoverher.“You’rewithdrawingtheinvitation?You’recancelingdinner?”“Nope,”Shannasaid
decisively.“I’mmovingitup.It’stomorrownight.Idon’twantyoutohaveawholeweektotalkyourselfoutofcoming.Sam,either.Seven
o’clock.I’llcallhimrightnowtoconfirm.”“ButIneversaidyes.”“Oh,you’llbehere,”
Shannasaidconfidently.“Don’tyouhaveenoughissueswiththefamilywithoutaddingcowardtothelist?”“That’snotfair,”Carrie
grumbled,knowingShannahadsetaveryneattrapforher.“Lifeisrarelyfair,”
Shannasaidbrightly.“ButO’Briensalwayscope.Seeyoutomorrow,sweetie.”ShehungupbeforeCarrie
couldformanotherprotestorthinkofasinglewaytowiggleoutofthecommitment.Maybe,ifshewerevery,verylucky,Samwoulddothewiggling.Sadly,withthewayherluckwasrunninglately,itwouldn’thappenthatway.
Andsomewhere,deepdowninside,atraitoroussparkofanticipationwasdoingalittlejigaboutthat.
6
SamhadbeensurprisedtohearfromShannasoquicklyaboutdinner.Infact,she’dcaughthimsocompletelyoffguard,hehadn’tbeenabletocomeupwithasingleexcusetorefuse,eventhoughhewasn’tcrazyabouther
obviousattempttothrowhimtogetherwithCarrie.Hetoldhimselfhe’dacceptedforBobby’ssake.ThatwastheonlythingthatgavehimanycomfortasheapproachedShannaandKevin’shouseonaquietsidestreetnotfarfromdowntown.Thoughthehouseappeared
smallfromthestreet,hediscoveredonenteringthatappearanceshadbeen
deceiving.Therehadbeenadditionsontotheback,includingabigsunroomwhereababyinpinkwasbouncinginachildseat,atoddlerwasclimbingalloverateenagerastheboytriedtoplayavideogameandyetanotherboywaslaughinghysterically.“Waytogo,”thelaughing
youngstertoldthetoddler.“Gethimoffofme,”the
olderboypleaded,stilltryingtoconcentrate.“Noway!”theotherboy
declared.“He’smysecretweapon.”“IthoughtCarriewasyour
secretweapon.Youloveditwhenshebustedmychopsyesterday.”Shannastoodinthe
doorway,shakingherhead.“Welcometomyworld,”shetoldSam.Sheraisedher
voice.“Boys!Wehavecompany.”“Henry,Daveyand
Johnny,”shesaidasshepointedtoeachofthem.“Thebaby’sKelly.Everyone,thisisSam.He’sworkingwithMackatthepaper.Andthisishisnephew,Bobby.”Bobbyhungbackshyly,
butsurprisinglyitwastheteenagerwhocameoverandheldoutahand.“Hey,
Bobby,doyoulikevideogames?”Bobbynodded.“Thenyoucanbeonmy
side.Davey’senlistedthelittlemonkeyovertheretotrytodistractmewhenit’smyturn.Youcandothesamewhenit’sDavey’sturn.”“Youwantmetoclimbon
him?”Bobbyaskedskeptically.Henrylaughed.“Whatever
works,”hesaid.“You’llthinkofsomething.”Bobbylookedhesitantlyup
atSam.“Isitokay?”BeforeSamcouldanswer,
Shannasteppedin.“Dowhateveryouneedtodo,”shetoldBobby.“Justnohittingorbiting.Thosearethehouserules.”SheturnedtoSam.“We
probablydon’twanttowatchthis.ComewithmeandI’ll
getyouaglassofwine.KevinshouldbeheresoonandCarrie’sonherway.She’sstoppingtopickupdessert.Nellbakedtoday.Honestly,Idon’tknowhowNelldoesit.Onceaweekthere’sKevin’sfavoriteapplepie,acoconutcakeforConnorandhisfamily,chocolatecakeforAbbyandTrace,sconesforanybodywhowantsthem.Shemust
havebeenabakerinherpreviouslife.She’ddoallthepastryfortheinn,ifJesswouldlether.Nowthatshe’sinhereighties,weallthinksheshouldslowdown,butshe’shavingnoneofit.Haveyoumetheryet?”Samshookhishead.“ButI
havehadafewofherchocolate-chipcookies,”Samsaid.“CarriegavemesomewhenIstoppedbyO’Briens
theothernight.”Shanna’seyeslitup.“Did
youtrythestew?That’sNell’srecipe,too.Infact,mostofthefoodinthepubisbasedontraditionalrecipesshelearnedwhenshestayedwithhergrandparentsinIrelandyearsago.”“SoLukeinheritedher
skillinthekitchen?”Shannalaughed.
“Absolutelynot.She
despairedofteachinghimathing.HebroughtinachefandNelltrainedhim.Shestilllooksoverhisshoulderregularlytobesurehe’snotmessingup.Nothinggoesonthemenuunlessithasherstampofapproval.ForaguywholearnedtocookinaNewYorkdeli,he’sadaptedquitewelltoNell’sIrishfavorites.EverynowandthenhesneaksaReubenora
pastramisandwichontothemenuasaspecial,andNellpretendsnottonotice.”JustthenCarrie’svoice
carrieddownthehallwaytothebigopenkitchen.Samfeltanimmediateandtroublingsparkofanticipation.Apparentlyhecouldtellhimselfathousandtimesthatgettinginvolvedwithherwasabadidea,buthistestosteronewasn’t
convinced.“Anybodyhere?”she
calledout.“Inthekitchen,”Shanna
repliedasshepouredtwoglassesofwine.ShehandedonetoSam,thenheldouttheothertoCarrieasshesetthepieonthecounter.“Gramsaystoheatthisup
beforeyouserveit,”CarrieinstructedShanna.“Asifshehasn’ttoldme
thateverysingleweeksincethedayImarriedKevin,”Shannasaid.Carrielaughed.“She
doesn’tliketoleaveanythingtochanceandI’mprettysureshe’sconvincedthatnotaoneofusinheritedasinglebitofherculinaryskill.”“Nottrue,”Shannasaid.
“Kevin’sactuallyquiteadeptinthekitchen.He’sjustneverhometocook.”
Hewalkedinjustintimetooverhearthecomment.“I’mherenow,”hesaid,givingherathoroughkiss.“AndIalwaystakecareoftheimportantthings,right?Likethis?”Laughing,Shannashoved
himawaywhenheclearlywouldhavestolenanotherkiss.“Company,Kevin.”“It’sjustCarrie,”hesaid.“AndSamWinslow,”
Shannasaid,givinghimagentleelbowintheribs.“Sam,myhusband,KevinO’Brien.”SamgrinnedatKevin’s
suddenlychagrinedexpression.“Ididn’trealizewehadcompanycompany,”heapologized.“IthoughtitwasjustCarrie.”“Thanks,”Carrie
grumbled,feigninganinsultedlook.“Alwaysa
pleasuretoseeyou,too.”SheglancedatSam.“AminuteagoIwouldhavetoldyouKevinwasmyfavoriteuncle,butnowhe’sonprobation.I’mthinkingUncleConnorhastheedge.”Theteasinginteractionwas
arevelationtoSam,whoseownfamilylife,ifitcouldevenbecalledthat,hadalwaysbeenfilledwithtensionandlong,awkward
silences.Therewasasuddenwhoop
ofgleefromthesunroom.“Videogame?”Kevin
asked.“Always,”Shannasaid
withasigh.“SoundsasifmaybeDaveyactuallywonthisone.”Kevinglancedtoward
Sam.“Youanygoodatthosegames?”“I’veplayedsome,”Sam
said,thoughfromwhathe’dobservedtonight,hewasn’tnearlyascompetitiveasthemalesinthisfamily.“Wanttogooutthereand
takethemon?”Kevinasked.“Sure,”Samsaidatonce,
eagertogetawayfromthekitchenandtheunwantedattractionthatseemedtobesimmeringbetweenhimandCarrie.“Twentyminutes,”Shanna
remindedthemsternly.“OnceIgetdinneronthetable,I’mnotcallingyoualltwice.Andmakesurealltheboyswashtheirhands.Anddon’tforgetthebaby,thewayyoudidlastnight.”Sambitbackasmileashe
followedKevintothesunroom.“Youforgotthebaby?”“Hey,she’dfallenasleep,”
Kevinexplainedinhisown
defense.“Sinceshe’salmostneverquietformorethanaheartbeat,IthinkIshouldbeforgivenfornotrealizingshewasthere.”“Youhavenoideahow
happyIamtohearyousaythat,”Samtoldhim.Kevinregardedhimwitha
puzzledlook.“Why’sthat?”“BecauseI’veonlyhad
responsibilityformynephewforacoupleofweeksand
I’vespentmostofthattimeterrifiedIwasgoingtodosomethingtotallystupid.AndasifIdidn’thaveenoughdoubtsmyself,Carriehascaughtmetwicedoingthingssheapparentlyconsideredunforgivable.”“Whatthings?”Kevin
asked.“IleftBobbysleepingin
thecarwhileIranintoO’Brienstopickuptakeout.
EventhoughIkeptmyeyeonhimthewholetime,thatwasn’tgoodenoughforher.AndthenextdayshethoughtIwasn’twatchingcloselyenoughwhilehewasclimbingonthejunglegymattheplayground.”“Whenitcomestokids,
Carrie’sanatural-bornworrier,”Kevinconsoledhim.“Justlikehermom.AndjustlikeAbby,Carriewillbe
agreatmomsomeday.Wealltrusthertokeepaneyeonourkids,butwealsoknowshe’soverprotective.She’llgetoveritoncesheseesthatnotevenshecanbeeverywhereatonce.Kidsareadventurous.Theydocrazythingsandsometimesthey’retoofastforustocatch’embeforetheyfall.Allwecandoisbealertandminimizetherisks,thenbereadyto
patchupanybumpsandbruises,dryanytears.”“Voiceofexperience?”
Samasked.“Asadadandasaformer
paramedic,”Kevinconfirmed.“There’sabigdifferencebetweenlettingkidsbekidsandallowingthemtotaketheoccasionalrisk,andbeinganegligentparent.You’llfigureitout,too.”
Samwasdoubtful.“Ihopeso.Bytheway,Bobbywasaskingifthere’sT-ballintown.”“Sure.Showupatthehigh
schoolfieldonSaturday.We’llgethimonateam.”Inthesunroom,Kevin
muscledHenryawayfromthecontrolsforthevideogame,tooktheotherremotefromDaveyandhandedittoSam.“Letusshowyouhow
it’sdone,boys.”“Oh,please,”Henry
taunted.“I’vebeenbeatingyousinceIwasakid.”“Me,too,”Daveygloated.
“Dad,you’rereallybad.”Samlaughed.“Then
maybeIhavehalfachance.”“LosertakesonCarrie,”
Henrysaid,hisexpressioninnocent.“You’llneedaconfidenceboost.”SomethingtoldSamhe’d
betterwinagainstKevin.ThelastthinghewantedwastobehumiliatedforhisineptitudeyetagainbyCarrieWinters.
***
“Areyouconvincednow?”CarrieaskedShannaasKevinandSamleftthekitchen.“Hebarelyevenlookedatme.”Shannawavedoffthe
comment.“Thatmeant
nothing.Ifanything,itwasmoretellingthanitwouldhavebeenifhe’dfawnedalloveryou.”“Seriously?”Carriesaid,
tryingtofollowherlogic.“Sure.Menactall
indifferentwhenthey’refeelingexactlytheoppositeanddon’twanttogiveanythingaway.”“Itwasjustplain
awkward,”Carriecorrected.
“Ishouldprobablygosoyouallcanhaveapleasantevening.”“Andlethimthinkhe
chasedyouoff?”Shannaasked.“Ithoughtyouweretougherthanthat.”“You’rethinkingofmy
twin.It’sCaitwho’stough.I’mallsweetandsensitive.”Shannaguffawedatthat.
“Sincewhen?Youdidn’tsurviveinthesharktankof
fashionbybeinganybody’spushover.”“You’rewrong,”Carrie
said,instantlysomber.“IwasMarc’spushover.”“Wholedifferentstory,
sweetie,”Shannasaid.“It’stimeyouputthatbehindyou.LetSambeyourreboundguy.Practicebeingawholenewyouonhim.”“Nowthere’sacharming
approach,”Carriesaid.“I’m
sureit’llmakehimfeelallwarmandfuzzyaboutbeingchosentoplaysuchanimportantroleinmylife.”“Youneverknow.He
mightliketheideaofbeingaknightinshiningarmorforalittlewhile.”Carriegaveheran
impatientlook.“Haven’tyoubeenmarriedlongenoughtostopbeingsucharomantic?”“IhopeIwillalwaysbea
romantic,”Shannaprotested.“It’sagoodwaytobe.Lookatyourgrandmother.DoyouthinksheandMickgotbacktogetherwithoutbothofthembeingromanticsatheart?”“Icertainlyseethesparks,”
Carrieadmitted,“butItrynottothinkaboutexactlyhowtheygotbacktogetherorwhattheydobehindcloseddoors.Infact,I’dbecontenttogotomygravewithout
havingthatparticularimageengravedonmybrain.”“They’regreatexamples,”
Shannacountered.“SoareNellandDillon.Ourfamilyiscrawlingwithwonderfulrolemodelswhoexemplifytheimportanceofromance.YourmomandTracearenoslouches.”“AnotherimageIprefer
nottodwellon,”Carriesaid.“Thoughtheyareawfully
cutetogether.And,justtobeclear,I’mnotdenyingtheimportanceofromance.I’mjustsayingI’veneverencounteredit,notinthewayyou’redescribing.”“Andyetyoutellusallthe
timethatwhatyouwantmostinlifeistobeawifeandmom.I’mtellingyouthatrequiresromanceandsappy,messyfeelingsandrisks.”Carriesighed.“Iknow
you’reright.ButSam?Ithinkthat’salostcause.Hecan’tpossiblyhavetimeforanythingthesedaysbeyonddiscoveringifhehaswhatittakestobeadad.”“Hecouldprobablyuse
somebodytoencouragehimandshowhimtheway,”Shannasuggested.“Somebodywho’sanaturalwithkids.”“You’resuggestingIcoach
him?”“Somethinglikethat.”“Hehasn’ttakenkindlyto
mostoftheadviceI’veofferedsofar,”Carrietoldher.“Advice?”Shanna
repeated,herbrowlifted.“Orcriticism?”Aguiltyflushcreptup
Carrie’sneck.“Criticism,”sheacknowledged.“Okay,Iseeyourpoint—aboutthat,
anyway.AsforSamandmeasacouple,Ithinkyou’rewayoffbaseaboutthat.”Shannamerelygavehera
knowingsmile.“Iguesswe’llsee.”
***
Despitethedifferenceintheirages,Bobbyseemedtoflourishunderalltheattentionoftheolderboys.
Heevenheldhisownwhenitcametoteasingthem.Samwatchedtheinteractionwithamazement,thenutteredasighofrelief.Kevinapparentlyoverheardhim,becausehegavehimapuzzledlook.“Whatwasthatsigh
about?”heaskedSam.“I’msureyou’veheardthe
storyofhowBobbycametobemyresponsibilitybarely
threeweeksago,”Samsaid,smilingwhenabellylaugheruptedfromBobbyasDaveypinnedhimdownandtickledhimtogetevenforsomething.Kevinglancedover.“Hey,
watchit!Rememberhe’syoungerthanyou.”“Hehasitcoming,”Davey
retorted.“HewassupposedtobeonmysideforthisgameandhehelpedHenryjust
then.”“Ididn’tmeanto,”Bobby
said,gigglingandscramblingaway.“Honest.Iforgot.Iwasonhissidebefore.”“Yeah,sure,”Daveysaid,
thentickledhimsomemore.KevinturnedtoSam.“You
okay?Davey’sjustteasing,butifyouthinkit’stoomuchroughhousing,Icancallahalttoit.”“Absolutelynot,”Sam
said.“It’swonderful.ThisisthefirsttimeI’veheardareallaughfromBobbysince,well,sincehelosthismomanddad.Iwasafraidthere’dbeentoomanychangesforhimtohandle.IwasthinkingabouttalkingtoWill,afterCarriementionedhe’sashrink.Ithoughthecouldhelpmefigureoutwhattodotomakethistransitioneasieronhim.”Hegesturedtoward
thepileoflaughingboys,whichnowincludedHenryandeventhetoddler.“Lookatthem.”Kevinshrugged.“Looks
normaltome.”Samcouldn’tseemtostop
thesmilespreadingacrosshisface.“Iknow.”Kevingavehimaslapon
theback.“I’mnoexpert,butitlookstomeasifyou’redoingjustfine.”
“Maybeyoucouldmentionthattoyourniece.”Kevingavehimaslylook.
“Doesherapprovalmattertoyou?”Samlaughed.“Nottheway
youmean.Ijustdon’twantherreportingmetochildprotectiveservices.”Justthenhehearda
shockedgaspbehindhimandturnedtoseeCarrie,hercomplexionsuddenlypale.
“IwouldneverreportyouandriskhavingBobbysentintofostercare,”shesaid.“Notunlessyoudidsomethingtotallyoutrageousordangerous.Howcouldyousaysuchathing?”“Well,itcertainlydoesn’t
seemasifyou’reveryimpressedwithmyparentingskills,”Samsaid,alreadyregrettingacommenthe’dmeantmostlyinjest.
“Maybeyoutwoshouldworkthisoutonthepatio,”Kevinsuggested,castingapointedlooktowardthesuddenlysilentboyswho’dturnedtoseewhyvoiceswereraised.“I’lltellShannashe’llhavetoholddinnerafewminutes.”“Butit’sreadynow,”
Carrieprotested.“Shesentmetotellyou.Besides,Ihavenothingtosaytohim.”
Herunclehadthenervetosmileatherpetulanttone.HewasabravermanthanSam.Samcouldfeeltheangerradiatingfromher.“Idisagree,andthis
conversationtakesprecedence,”Kevininsisted.“Go,settlethisandgetbackinbeforedinnergetscoldsomywifedoesn’tlosepatiencewithallofus.”Heturnedtoaddressthe
kidsashepickedupthebaby.“Handswashedandinthediningroom.Davey,youshowBobbywheretogo.AndmakesureJohnnywashesup,too.”Shouldersstiff,Carrieled
thewaypastSam,openedapairofFrenchdoorsandwalkedontoaflagstonepatio.Keepingherbacktohim,shefoldedherarmsacrossherchest.
Takingadeepbreath,Samwalkedupbesideher.“Whichoneofusshouldgofirst?Kevindidn’tmentionthat.”“Youstartedit,”she
muttered.Sheglancedhiswayand
gavehimahurtlook.ToSam’sdismaythereweretearsinhereyes.“Whatwouldmakeyou
thinkI’dturnyouintochildprotectiveservices?”she
asked.“Isn’tthatwhatpeopleare
supposedtodowhentheythinkaparent’sbeingnegligent?”Samresponded.“You’vemadeitprettyclearthatyouthinkI’minept.Ican’tevenarguewithyourperception.I’mfloundering,noquestionaboutit.”Sheflushed,thensighed
heavily.“AndIshouldbecuttingyouawholelotof
slackunderthecircumstances.It’snotasifIhavetonsofparentalexperiencemyself.”“Butyou’regreatwith
kids,”Samsaid.“EveryoneI’verunacrosssaysso.YouhavenoideahowIenvythat.Ineverexpectedtobeadad.”“Youdidn’twant
children?”shesaid,lookinggenuinelyshocked.“Ineverthoughtmuch
aboutit.Myparentsweren’tthebestexamples,soIfiguredIshouldavoidfollowingintheirfootsteps.Mysisteralwayssaidshewasn’tcutoutformotherhoodforthesamereason,butthenLaurelmetRobertandhewassolidandsteadyandcompletelyunflappable—perfectdadmaterial.Heconvincedhertheycouldbegreatparents,
andtogether,theyreallywere.Bobby’sagreatkid,andIknowit’sbecausetheyknewwhattheyweredoing,unlikeme.”“Youcanbeagreatdad,
too,”Carriesaidwithfeeling.“I’msosorryifthethingsIsaidmadeyoufeelinadequate,orshouldIsaymoreinadequatethanyouwerealreadyfeeling.Itendtoopenmymouthwithout
thinking,especiallywhenachildisinvolved.”“That’smypoint,”Sam
said.“YoucouldtellrightawaythatBobbywasinthehandsofsomeonewhodidn’tknowwhattheyweredoing.Andyoucaredenoughtosaysomething.”“Butyoudidknowmore
thanIgaveyoucreditfor,”shecorrected.“Whenyoulefthiminthecar,instincttold
youtokeepaneyeonhim.Ijustjumpedtoconclusions.Samewiththejunglegym.Youknewitwassomethinghelovedandlethimgoforit,ratherthanhoveringtoocloseandmakinghimscaredtotrysomething.Ithinkreallygoodparentshavetofindabalancebetweenlettingkidsgrowandbeingoverlyprotective.”Shemethisgaze.“I’m
sorry,Sam.Itrulyam.How
aboutthis?NexttimeIthinkyou’rehandlingsomethingwrong,I’llmentionit,butIwon’tgetalljudgmentalandcrazyonyou.”Helaughed.“Doyoureally
thinkyoucanpullthatoff?”Shewinced.“Icanatleast
try.”“Well,don’ttrytoohard.
Despitenotenjoyingbeingthetargetofyourindignation,Ilikethatyouwereprotective
ofalittleboyyoudidn’tevenknow.Iadmireyouforcaringthatmuch.AndjusttoreassureyouaboutBobby,Imaybeinexperiencedandthesituationmaybetotallyunexpected,butI’mgoingtobethebeststand-inforhisdadthatIcanpossiblybe.”“Ibelievethat,”shesaid,
thenstudiedhim.“So,we’regood?”Henodded.“We’regood.”
“Okay,then.IseeShannaatthekitchenwindowstaringatus.I’mnotsureifshe’sjustcurioustoseeifwe’rekillingeachotherortickedoffaboutdinnergettingruined.”“Let’sgoinside,soshecan
checkforinjuries,”Samsuggested.“And,totellthetruth,I’vebeenlookingforwardtoahome-cookedmealeversincesheinvited
Bobbyandmeover.I’dhateforittobespoiled.”Carriefellintostepbeside
himastheywentbackin.“Don’tyoucook?”“I’masingleguy.Igrill
andIorderpizza.Iamalsoamasterofcoldcereal.”“Oh,dear,”shesaid,
regardinghimwithalarm.“Iknow,”hesaid,holding
upahandbeforeshecouldsaymore.“AssoonasBobby
andIhaveourownplace,Iwillmakesurehehashealthymeals,evenifIhavetorelyonsomebodyelsetocookthem.I’llgetShannatorecommendafoolproofcookbook.”Shegrinned.“Anexcellent
plan.Andknowingthesinglewomeninthistown,Iimagineyoucancountoncasserolesanddessertsturninguponaregular
basis.”“Willyoubeoneofthose
women?”“Youneverknow,”she
saidlightly.“Ofcourse,ifIam,I’llmakesureNelldoesthecooking.OrmaybeLuke’schef.Myskillinthekitchenisonlymarginallybetterthanyouclaimyoursis.”Herexpressionbrightened.“Orhowaboutthis?Wecouldbothtake
lessonsfromNell.She’dloveit,andyouandBobbydefinitelywouldn’tstarve.”Samwasstartledbythe
suggestion.“Whatdoyougetoutofit?”“Ibecomeoneofthefew
O’Brienswhoactuallyknowsherwayaroundthekitchen.Nell’salwaysbeensogoodatcooking,wecountonherforallthebigfamilyoccasions.Iwouldn’tmindhaving
braggingrightsasaworthysuccessorsomedaydowntheroad.UptillnowKevin’shadthem,buthedoesn’texercisethemenoughtocountanymore.”Samlaughed.“Ah,Ifinally
seeachinkinyourarmorofperfection.Signmeup,ifNell’swilling.”Herfacelitup.“Seriously?
You’lldoit?”Heshrugged.“Whynot?
BobbyandIhavetoeat.”Andperhapsitwouldgive
himachancetoseeCarrieinasettinginwhichshewasn’tquitesosureofherself.Helikedknowingshedidn’texcelateverything.Andevenwitheverythingalreadyonhisplateandhisdeterminationtoremainimmunetotheattraction,hehadtoadmitthatdiscoveringmoreaboutCarrieWinters
wasanintriguingprospect.
7
Shewascrazy,CarriethoughtasshewalkedtoNell’scottagethemorningafterdinneratShannaandKevin’s.WhywouldshethrowherselfintothepathofdangerbyspendingevenmoretimearoundSamand
Bobby?JustasCaitlynhadsuggestedduringherlastcall,CarrierecognizedthatshewasvulnerablerightnowandSam—aflounderingsingledad—wasexactlythesortofmanshewaslikelytofallforwhenshewasinsuchavulnerablestate.ShecouldtellherselffromnowtilldoomsdaythatshewasonlyinterestedinBobby’swell-being,butthelittlesizzlethat
ranthroughherwhenshewasincloseproximitytoSamsaidotherwise.Sizzles,assheknewalltoowell,couldturnintodangerousfires.Whenshetappedonher
great-grandmother’sfrontdoor,itwasDillonwhoanswered.“Well,ifitisn’tthe
prettiestgreat-granddaughterintheworld,”hesaidwiththatwonderfulIrishliltinhis
voice.“YoudoknowthatCaitlyn
andIlookexactlyalike,”sheresponded.Feignedsurprisespread
acrosshisface.“Doyou,now?Therearetwoofyou?”Carrielaughedandkissed
hischeek.“Youknowthereare.Where’sGram?She’snotstillasleep,isshe?”Helookedappalledbythe
verythought.“Thislateinthe
day?Notachance.She’sonherkneesinthegarden,despitemetellinghershehasnobusinessdoingalltheweedingherself.SinceIcan’tmakeherseereason,seeifyoucan’tlureherinsideforacupofteaandagoodlongchat.”“It’ssuchalovelyday,
maybeI’llmaketheteaandtakeitoutside,instead,”Carriesuggested.“She’s
muchmorelikelytotakeabreakifshecanenjoyherpreciousgardenatthesametime.”Dillonnoddedapprovingly.
“Andthat’swhyyou’rethesmartestgreat-granddaughter,aswellastheprettiest.”Carrielaughed.“I’mso
gladyoubroughtthatblarneywithyoufromDublin,rightalongwithyourloveforGram.”
“Nochoiceinthematter,mydarlinggirl.Nochoiceatall.Therewerefartoomanyyearswhenwewereapart.Iintendtospendwhatevertimewehaveleftonthisearthsidebyside,whereverthatmaybe.ChesapeakeShoresandherfamilyaretoomuchapartofmyNelltoaskhertocometoIrelandtobewithme.AndI’mblessedtohavemyowngranddaughterMoira
herenow,too,withLuke.”“Funnyhowthingswork
out,isn’tit?”Carriesaid,asshepouredboilingwaterovertheIrishBreakfasttealeaveshergrandmotherpreferred.Bringingateabagintothishousewouldbeconsideredpracticallysacrilegious.Teawastobemadetheold-fashionedway,ornotatall.“Therearealwayssurprisingtwistsandturns.”
“Lifeamazesmeeveryday,tobesure,”Dillonagreed.“That’showIknowI’mliving.”“Doyouneedhelp
carryingthatoutside?”heaskedassheputtwoofNell’sprettiestcups,theantiquechinateapotwithitscrackledfinish,amatchingsugarbowlandafewslicesoflemononatray.“Ihaveit,butthanks,”she
said.“Enjoyyourvisit.”He
reachedforsomewetwipesandatowel.“Takethesealong.Nellneverwearsgardeningglovesthewayshe’spromisedto.She’llwanttocleanupbeforetouchingthosepreciouscupsofhers.”Carriesmiledassheleft
thekitchenofthecozylittlecottageoverlookingthebay.
Dillontrulywasatreasure,andhislong-heldloveforNellhadbeenawonderfuldiscoveryonthefamily’striptoIrelandseveralyearsago.Reunitedafteryearsapart,theysetanexampleforthewholefamilyofhowlovecouldendure,despitenearlyalifetimewithotherpeople.Carriesettheteatrayona
tablebesidetwoAdirondackchairsfacingthebay,then
crossedthelawntowardthegardens.Shefoundhergreat-grandmotherwithherroses,humminganIrishtunethatsoundedfamiliar,thoughCarriecouldn’tcomeupwiththewords.“Doesmusicmakethe
rosesbloombetter?”sheteased.Nelllookedup,startled,
thenlaughed.“Notmine,Isuspect.Butitmakesme
happy.Whatbringsyoubyonthislovelysummermorning?”“Iwashopingforacupof
teaandachatwithmyfavoriteperson.”Shenoddedinthedirectionofthechairs.“I’vemadeitjustthewayyoulikeit.Canyoutakeabreak?”Nellfrowned.“DidDillon
putyouuptothis?He’sbeenpesteringmeallmorning
aboutthedampnessmakingthearthritisinmykneesworse.”“Heworriesaboutyou.”“Oh,Iknowthat,andI
lovehimforit,butI’vebeengardeningforenoughyearstoknowthatthepleasureoutweighsafewachesandpains.Butacupofteaandachancetocatchupwithyouwouldbewelcome.”Asshestruggledtogetto
herfeet,Carrieheldoutahand,butasshe’dexpected,Nellignoreditandmadeitonherown.Carriehandedherthewipesandtowel.“Iimaginethesewere
Dillon’sdoing,too,”shegrumbled,thoughherblueeyessparkledwithaffection.“Hesaysyouforgetto
wearyourgardeninggloves.”“Idon’tforgetathing.Half
thejoyisgettingalittle
dirty.”Carrieputanarmaround
Nell’swaist.“Orneryoldthing.”“Iamthat,”Nellsaidwith
prideastheywalkedacrossthelawn.“HowdoyouthinkI’velivedsolong?”Whentheywereseatedand
theteahadbeenpoured,sheturnedaseriousgazeonCarrie.“What’sonyourmind?Youaren’tletting
Mickpressureyouaboutwhatyou’regoingtodonext,areyou?”“Hehasapoint,”Carrie
conceded.“Ishouldmakeadecisionofsomekind.”“Well,myadviceistotake
yourtime.There’snorush.Therightanswerwillcometoyou.”“IwishIbelievedthat,”
Carriesaidwithasigh,thenshruggedoffthewayher
indecisionweighedonher.“That’snotwhyI’mhere,though.Iwaswonderingifyou’dhavealittletimetoteachmetocook.Me,andafriend,thatis.”Nell’seyessparkledwith
delight.“I’dlovethat,”shesaidenthusiastically.Herexpressionturnedcurious.“Tellmeaboutthisfriend.Itmustbeaman,sinceIcan’timagineyouwantingtospend
timeinthekitchenifitweren’t.”“MaybeIjustthinkit’s
timesomeonelearnsallyourrecipes,”Carrieresponded.“Luke’schefknowsagood
manyofthem.”“He’snotfamily.”“AndyouruncleKevinhas
pickedupafew.”“Iwanttoknowthemall.”“Andthisfriend,what’shis
motivation?”
CarrieexplainedaboutSamandBobby.“Oh,thepoorlittlething,”
Nellsaidatonce.“Hehasaweaknessfor
chocolate-chipcookies,”Carriereported.“Igavehimacoupleofyoursatthepubtheothernight.Igathertheywereahit.”“Well,hecan’tverywell
liveoncookiesandpizzaandwhateverSamcantakeoutof
thefreezerorpickupintown,”Nellsaidbriskly,herexpressionthoughtful.“IfSamisworkingforMackandtryingtomanageachildforthefirsttime,Iimaginehedoesn’thavealotoftime.Youfindoutwhenhehasacoupleofhourstospare,letmeknowandbringbothofthemby.Promisethemtherewillbeagoodmealattheendofthelesson.”
“Thanks,Gram.”“Now,tellmewhatthis
youngmanislike.Ishehandsome?”Carrieblushed.“I
suppose.”Nellleveledadirectlookat
herthathadhersquirming.“Isithimyou’redrawntoortheboy?”“Maybeboth,”she
admitted.“Oh,mydarlinggirl,be
careful.”“Iwillbe,Gram.Nobody
knowsbetterthanIdothatIshouldn’tevenbethinkingaboutarelationshiprightnow.Ihaveenoughdecisionstomake.”“That’snotatallwhatI’m
saying.Lovecomesalongonitsowntimetable.Ijustwantyoutobesurethatyou’respendingtimewiththismanfortherightreasons.There’s
alittleboywho’sbeenthroughtoomuchtobeconsidered.Whentwoadultstryandfail,it’sonething,butyoudon’twanttomakeamistakethatcouldhurtachildwho’salreadysufferedaterribleloss.”“It’snotasifSamandIare
dating,”Carrieprotested.“Wecanbarelycallwhatever’sgoingonafriendship.Ijustwantto
help.”“Andthat’salovely
gesture.Justthinkcarefullybeforeitgoesanyfurther.”“Believeme,Iwill,”Carrie
promised.“Nowletmetaketheteathingsbackinside.Areyoucoming?”“Istillhavemyrosesto
tendto,”Nellsaid.“YoucanreassureDillonthatI’mnotoverdoingitandthatifhe’sallthatworried,hecanget
outhereandpullafewweedshimself.Iwon’teventellhimhe’sdoingitallwrong.”Carrielaughed.“I’llpass
thatalong.”ShehuggedNell.“Iloveyou.I’llbeintouchaboutthecooking.”“I’llbelookingforwardto
thelessonsandtomeetingyouryoungman.”“He’snotmyyoungman,”
Carrieremindedher,probablytonoavail.Noone
inthisfamilylistenedtosuchdenialsunlessitsuitedtheirpurposes.Romantics,thewholedarnlotofthem!
***
DeterminednottodwellonNell’sspeculationaboutherrelationshipwithSam,Carriedecidedshe’dwaitbeforecallinghim.Shedidn’twanttoseemoverlyeager.And
sinceshedidn’thaveJacksontoday,maybeshecouldgoshoppingforafewthingsthatdidn’tpracticallyscreamdesignerwhensheputthemon.Shedidn’twanttothinkaboutwhyshefeltthatwasnecessary.NotscaringSamoffshouldnotbeaconsideration.Shewasonherwayback
fromthenearestmallwayoutonthemainnorth-south
highway,whenshespottedaday-carecenteronalargefenced-inpatchoflawnwithacolorfulswingsetinthebackyard.WithLuke’ssuggestionaboutapossiblecareerstillverymuchonhermind,shemadeaU-turnandwentback,mostlyoutofcuriosity.Alookaroundwouldn’thurtanything,andmaybeitwouldeveninspireher.
Inside,shecouldhearshoutsofgleefullaughtercomingfromtheback.Thatsoundmadehersmile.Thegirlatthereception
desk,wholookedtobebarelyoutofherteens,hungupthephoneandgrinnedatCarrie.“It’ssnacktime.Italwaysgetsnoisierthen.CanIhelpyou?”“IwaswonderingifIcould
speaktotheowneror
managerforafewminutes,”Carriesaid.“About?Ifyouhavea
childyou’dliketoenroll,we’renottakinganynewclientsrightnow.”“No,it’snotthat.Actually,
it’salongstory,buttheshortversionisthatI’mthinkingofopeningadaycareoverinChesapeakeShores.”Shesmiledreassuringly.“Nocompetitionforthisone.I
couldusesomeadviceandI’dliketolookaroundifsheorhedoesn’tmind.”“Holdon.Letmecheck,”
thegirlsaid.“I’mLucy,bytheway.LucyMorris.”“AndI’mCarrieWinters.
Doyouworkherefull-time?”“Prettymuch,butI’malso
studyingearlychildhoodeducation.MymomopenedthisdaycarewhenIwasababy,soI’veprettymuch
grownuparoundtheplace.I’vebeenworkinghereeversincehighschool.”“Youmustloveitsince
youchoseearlychildhoodeducationasacareer.”“It’sthebestjobever,”she
saidcheerfully,thenmadeaface.“Exceptonthedaysitisn’t.”“Whichdaysarethose?”“Whenonekidiscranky
andthemoodseemstobe
contagious.Orwhenmomcavesinandbringscookiesforsnacktime.Twentykidsonasugarhigh?”Sheshuddered.“Notpretty.”Carriechuckled.“Iknow
whatyoumean.I’vehadahousefulofkidsatmyhouselikethatatimeortwo.ThedayafterHalloweencanbeparticularlydicey.”“Tellmeaboutit.”Lucy
heldupafingertoindicate
hermotherhadfinallypickedupthephone.“Mom,there’sawomannamedCarrieWintersherewho’dliketotalktoyouaboutrunningadaycare.Canyoutakeaminute?I’llcomebackandtakeover,ifyouwanttocomeoutherewhereit’squiet.”Shenodded.“Surething.I’lltellher.”Whenshe’dhungup,she
stood.“Shetoldmetobring
youbacksoyoucangetafirsthandlookatthecraziness.She’llspendalittletimewithyouafterthat.”“Perfect.Thankyouso
much.”Lucygrinnedather.“I
predictyou’lleitherfallinloveinthefirstfiveminutesorrunforyourlife.Eitherway,you’llhavesomeinklingifthisisrightforyou.”
“Isurehopeso,”Carriesaid,followingherthroughasetofdoubledoorsthatledintoalargeplayarea.Aquickglancearoundhad
hersmiling.ThecolorswerebrightandcheerfulfromapaletteverysimilartotheoneusedinNoah’soffices.Tinytablesandchairswerescatteredaroundtheroom,alongwithboxesstuffedwithtoys.Therewasachalkboard
inanareawhereafewyoungchildrenwereapparentlyengrossedinlessonsthatwouldgivethemaheadstartfortheupcomingschoolyear.Somewerereading,butothersseemedtobegettingtutoringfromaboywholookedtobehighschoolage.Everyonewasfinishingupasnackofcheese,crackersandcarrotsticks,alongwithbottledwater.
Awomanwhoappearedtobeinherearlyfortiesdisentangledherselffromthreepreschoolerswhowerebeggingforanotherstory.“SitquietlyandLucywillreadtoyou,”shepromised.“Gopickoutonebookeach.”Thechildrenscampered
awayandthewomancameover.“I’mJulieMorris,”shesaid.Shenoddedtowardtheyoungerchildren.“Lucy,
you’lltakeover?”“I’monit,”Lucysaid.
“Nicetomeetyou,Ms.Winters,”shecalledoverhershoulderassherushedafterthekids.“Iknowitprobablyseems
chaotic,butit’sanorganizedchaos,”Julietoldher.“Lucysaidyou’reinterestedinopeningadaycare.”“I’mexploringthe
possibility,”Carriesaid.“I
hadanothercareer,butitturnedouttobeabadfit.SomeonesuggestedthatChesapeakeShorescoulduseagoodday-carecenter.”“So,outoftheblue,you
wanttosnapyourfingersanddoit?”Julieasked,herexpressionskeptical.Carriewinced.Itdidsound
crazywhenherplanwasdescribedthatway.“It’snotquiteasimpulsiveasit
sounds.EversinceIgotbacktotown,I’vebeencaringformynephewasafavortohismomanddad.Otherkidsinmyfamilyareinandoutofthehouseallthetime.IlovehavingthemunderfootandeveryonesaysI’mverygoodwiththem.”“Runningadaycareisa
lotmoredifficultthanbabysitting,”Juliecautioned.“Iknowthat.Ididtakea
fewearlychildhoodeducationcoursesincollegeaselectives,butIunderstandthat’sjustthetipoftheiceberg.That’soneofthereasonsIstoppedbywhenIspottedyourcenterasIwasdrivinghomejustnow.Irealizethere’salotIneedtolearnandIdon’twanttodothisbyhalfmeasuresifI’mgoingtodoit.Ifyouknewmyfamily,you’dknowwe
mightmakeimpulsivedecisions,butwedoourhomeworkandwedothingsright.Andtohearmygrandfathertellit,failure’snotanoption.”Juliestudiedherintently,
thenseemedtoreachadecision.“Look,Icansitdownwithyouandgooverregulations,yourbusinessplanandalltheotherthingsittakestobesuccessfulinthis
business.Icanevenadviseyouonsomecoursesifyouwanttofillintheeducationalblanks.”“Thatwouldbeincredibly
generousofyou,”Carriesaidenthusiastically.“I’dbehappytopayyouforyourtime.”Juliesmiled.“Nota
chance,becauseI’mnotgoingtostartadvisingyou,atleastnotrightaway.You
thinkyouwanttodothis,thenyousignupforthosecoursesonline,thencomehereacoupleofdaysaweekasavolunteer.You’llknowsoonenoughifyou’reanygoodatit.WhenIseeifyou’reserious,thenI’llteachyoueverythingyouneedtoknow.I’vebeenrunningthiscentersinceLucywasababyandI’vegotanexcellentreputation.IfI’mgoingtobe
yourmentor,thenI’mgoingtobethorough.”Carriewasmomentarily
takenaback,butthenshechuckled.“Done,”shesaid,holdingoutherhand.“We’lldoityourway.Ihavethebabyacoupleofdaysaweek,butIcanworkherearoundthat.”“Oryoucanbringthebaby
withyou,”Juliesaid.“Iwon’tevenchargeyouforit,since
you’regoingtobepitchinginasvolunteerstaff.I’veworkedthatdealwithacoupleofmomswhoneedchildcarewhiletheyhuntforwork.”“Somethingtellsme
spottingthisplacewastheluckiestthingtohappentomeinalongtime,”Carriesaidsincerely.ShelikedthatJuliewasn’t
goingtohandoverabunchof
factsandfiguresordoleoutadvicewithoutbeingsurethatCarriewasuptothejob.ShewasobviouslyawomanwhotookherresponsibilitytothechildreninhercareseriouslyandintendedtodowhatevershecouldforthosewhomightbeinCarrie’scaredowntheroad.ForthefirsttimeCarriewasstartingtoviewthewholeday-careideaasaserious,viableoptionfor
herfuture.“Mondaymorning,”Julie
toldher.“Igetherebyfive-thirty.Acoupleofparentsworkveryearlyshiftsanddropofftheirkidsonthewaytowork.Six-thirtywillbeearlyenoughforyou.”“I’llbehere,”Carrie
promised,managingtohideherstartledreactiontotheearlyhour.She’dgrownusedtolatenightsandlaid-back
mornings,acarryoverfromherlifestylewhenshe’dworkedwithMarc.Julienoddedapprovingly.
“Iexpectedyoutoreactdifferentlytotheearlyhour.”“I’lladmitthatI’venever
beenmuchofamorningperson,”Carrieconceded.“ButIamareliableone.I’llbehere.”“Keepsurprisingmeand
we’llgetalongjustfine.Now
I’dbettergetoverthereandseehowLucy’sholdingup.Thekidsadoreher,buttheytendtotrytotakeadvantageofher.She’sstillworkingonbeingadisciplinarianwhensheneedstobe.”ShegaveCarriea
distractedwaveasshehurriedoff.Carriestoodwhereshewas
foramomentlonger,soakingupthehigh-pitchedlaughter,
thesightofkidsbouncingintheirseatswithexcitementastheiryoungtutormadewhateverlessontheywerehavingfun.Theatmosphereintheroomwrappeditselfaroundherandwarmedherheartinawaynothinghadinaverylongtime.ApparentlyLukehadbeen
ontosomethingwhenhe’dpointedherinthisdirection.Shesupposedshe’dfindout
forsureoverthenextfewweeksormonthsorhoweverlongittookforJulietodecideifCarriehadpassedherpersonaltest.Carriealreadyhadapretty
goodideathatthistimeshe’dfoundaperfectfit.
***
WhenshefinallygotbacktoChesapeakeShores,Carrie
foundhergrandfatherpacingupanddownthefrontwalk,acellphoneuptohisear.Whenhesawher,hedisconnectedandshovedthephoneinhispocket.“It’sabouttimeyougot
home.Whyweren’tyouansweringyourphone?”“Thebatterydied,”Carrie
replied,thinkinghowconvenientthatwas,giventheexpressiononher
grandfather’sface.Shekissedhischeek.“What’sup?”“That’swhatIwantto
know,”hegrumbled.“You’vebeenavoidingme.”“I’vebeenbusy.”“Doingwhat?”Sheheldupherpackages.
“Shopping,foronething.”“Youcouldn’tpossibly
needmoreclothes.Ihelpedhaulallyourthingsoverhere,incaseyou’veforgotten.”
“TheywerealittletoofancyforeverydayinChesapeakeShores,”shesaid.“Iboughtafewmorepracticalthings.”Hisgazenarrowed.“So,
you’renotthinkingoftakingoffagainrightaway?”“Nope,”shesaid,setting
allthebagsdowninachair,thenheadingforthekitchen.“Icouldusesomeicedtea.Howaboutyou?”
“Tea’sfine,”hesaid.“Answerswouldbebetter.”“Ihaven’theardany
questionsyet.”Herbacktohim,shepulledapitcherofteafromtherefrigerator,retrievedtwoglassesfromacabinet,addedice,thenpouredthetea,takinghertimeaboutitbeforefacinghimagain.Hescowledather.“Don’t
besmartwithme,young
lady.”Shesmiled.“Askwhatever
youlike,GrandpaMick,butontheadviceofcounsel,Ireservetherightnottoanswer.”Thescowldeepened.
“Whatcounsel?Whatthedevilareyoutalkingabout?”Carrielaughed.“Grandma
MegantoldmeIdon’thavetoletyoupryintomylifeunlessIwantto.”
“Myownwifetoldyouthat?”hedemandedincredulously.“Shealsosaidshewas
goingtogetyoutostopbuggingme.”Shesigheddramatically.“Iguessthatdidn’tworkoutsowell.”Hescrubbedahandacross
hisfaceandlookedasifhewereclingingtohislastthreadofpatience.“Iswearthatwomanisgoingtobethe
deathofme.”Carriegavehiman
impulsivehug.“Butyouloveherlikecrazy.”“ThatIdo.”Helookedinto
hereyes.“AndIloveyou,too.Iwantyoutobehappy.Thatmeansgettingonwithyourlife.Idon’tseeyoudoingthat,thoughifyou’vemadeadecisiontostayhere,Isupposethat’sastart.”“I’mworkingontherest,”
Carrieassuredhim.“Honest,GrandpaMick.I’mseeingthingsmoreclearlythanIhaveinalongtime.”Hisexpressionbrightened.
“Tellme.”“Notjustyet.Iwanttosee
howthingsgofirst.”“NotevenatinyhintsoI
don’tworry?”“Notevenatinyhint,butI
promiseyoucanstopworrying.Theskieshave
clearedandtheoutlookaroundhereisimprovingbytheminute.”“Whateverthatmeans,”he
grumbledagain.“Itmeansyoucangomeet
GrandmaMeganatthegallery,takeheroutforanicedinnerandtalkaboutsomethingotherthanmeandmyproblemsforachange.I’msureshe’llappreciatethat.”
Heshookhishead,butsmiledatlast.“I’msureshewill.Okay,then.I’llstoppesteringyou.”Hegaveherameaningfullook.“Fornow,”heamended.“ButifIdon’tlikewhatI’mseeing,Ireservetherighttospeakup.”“Iwouldn’thaveitany
otherway,”shetoldhimassheledthewaytothedoor.“Loveyou.”“Loveyou,too,though
howyouturnedouttobesuchastubbornoneisbeyondme.”“Lotsofexamples,”she
remindedhim.“Andyou’rethebestoneofall.”Assheclosedthedoor
behindhim,sheleanedagainstitforamoment,thenrealizedshewassmiling.Forthefirsttimeinwhatfeltlikeforever,shehadn’tbeenfibbingtohim.Sheheaded
forhercomputertolookforsomeoftheclassesJuliehadsuggestedshecouldfindonline.Smilingasshesignedupfortwoofthem,shefinallyfeltasifshewasstartingtohavesomecontroloverherlifeagain.
***
Samhadbroughthomepizzaforthesecondnightinarow,
mostlybecauseitwaswhatBobbyhadinsistedhewantedandbecauseSamcouldn’tcomeupwithasensiblealternative.“Wecan’tgoonlikethis,”
hemutteredmostlytohimself.“Whynot?”Bobbyasked,
devouringhissecondslice.Atleastitwasaveggie
pizzatonight,Samthought,aconcessiontoahealthier
lifestyle.“Becauseyouneedreal
food.”“Pizzaisrealfood,”Bobby
said,lookingconfused.“Thisoneevenhasyuckyvegetablesonit.”Samnotedthepileofsaid
vegetablesthatBobbyhadpickedoffandleftonhisplate.“Theydon’tcountunlessyouactuallyeatthem.”“Idon’tlikethem,”Bobby
saidreasonably.“IfIatethem,I’dprobablygetsick.”“Youwouldn’tgetsick,I
promise.”Athoughtstruckhim.“Didyourmomeverletyouhavepizzaeverynightoftheweek?”Bobbyhesitated,clearly
debatingbetweenthetruthandananswerthatwouldkeepthepizzacoming.“No,”heconcededfinally.“ItwasforSaturdaynight.”His
expressionbrightened.“Andtomorrow’sSaturday,sowecanhaveitagain!”Samshookhishead.“I
don’tthinkso,pal.”Hegrabbedhiscellphone,
checkedforCarrie’sphonenumber,whichhe’dprogrammedin,andcalledbeforehecouldthinkaboutthewisdomofit.“Well,hi,”shesaid.
“Everythingokay?”
“Yousaidsomethingaboutcookinglessons,”heremindedher.“I’monoursecondnightinarowofpizzawithathirdoneinstoreunlessyoucansaveus.”Shelaughed.“Ispoketo
Gramthismorningandshe’seagertostartwheneverwe’reready.Iwasgoingtocallyoutocheckyourschedule,butIhadabusydaytoday.”“Wouldtomorrowbetoo
soon?Ineedtobreakthispizzahabitasquicklyaspossible.”“Areyougoodwith
anytimetomorrow?”“I’mtakingBobbyto
checkintoT-ballfirstthinginthemorning,butweshouldbefreebyeleven.AnytimeafterthatifitworksforNell,”hetoldher.“Andyou.”“LetmecheckandI’llget
rightbacktoyou.”
“Youhavemynumber?”“OncallerID,”she
responded.“I’llcallyouinacoupleofminutes.”“Thanks.”“WasthatCarrie?”Bobby
askedwhenSamsethisphonewithinreachonthetable.“Itwas.She’sgoingtoset
upsomecookingclassesforuswithhergreat-grandmother.”
Bobbyimmediatelylookedworried.“Somethingwrong?”Sam
asked.“DoIgettocome,too?”Overthepastfewdays,
SamhadnoticedthatBobbyrarelylethimoutofhissight.Itwasunderstandable,butitprobablyneededtochangeorthefirstdayofschoolwasgoingtobeaproblem.Still,hecouldn’tverywellbreak
thehabituntilhehadgoodalternatives.HeconsideredcallingShannaorevenKevintoseeifthey’dtakeBobbytoT-ballinthemorning,butonelookatthefearinBobby’seyestoldhimhecouldn’tdoit.“Sureyoucancome.”WhenCarriecalledback,
hewalkedoutontothebalconyoftheirroomattheinnandfinalizedtheplans.
“IsitokayifBobbycomesalong?”heasked,explainingBobby’sreactiontotheprospectofbeingseparatedfromSamevenforalittlewhile.“Gram’scountingonit,”
Carrieassuredhim.“And,bytheway,goodjobpickinguponhisfear.”“Pickinguponitisone
thing,”Samsaid.“Butnoteverysituationwillbe
resolvedaseasilyasthisone.Ihavetogobacktoworknextweek.Schoolstartsnotlongafterthat.”“You’llfigureitout,”
Carrieassuredhim.WhenSamremainedsilent,
shesaid,“Didyouhearme?”“Idid.Ijustcouldn’tquite
believewhatIwashearing.”“Ilearnedmylesson,”she
toldhim.“Positivereinforcementfromhereon
out.Doesithelp?”“Surprisingly,itdoes,”
Samsaid.“Seeyoutomorrow.”“Lookingforwardtoit.
Wantmetopickyouup,soIcanshowyouthewaytothecottage?”“Sure,”Samsaid,though
healreadyhadaprettygoodideawhereitwas.Anythingtospendalittlemoretimearoundthepositiveenergy
shewassuddenlyexuding.Itwaspitifulhowbadlyheneededthatrightnow.
8
WhenMackcouldn’tfindSusieathome,hedroveintotownandheadedfortherealestateoffice.Susierarelystayedlate,butforthepastcoupleofdaysshe’dbeenthereuntileightorlater.Whenhe’dasked,she’dtold
himthatpaperworkhadpiledupbecauseofthedaysshe’dstayedhome.Hehadn’tboughtherexcuse,andwhenhe’drunintoherdadearlier,Jeffhadconfirmedthattherewasnobacklogofpaperwork.“Anyideawhat’sgoing
on?”Jeffhadaskedhim.“Iknowhavingtheadoptionfallthroughwasablow,butshe’sbouncedbackalotmorequicklythanI’danticipated.
Andsinceshecamebacktotheoffice,she’sbeenworkingharderthanever.”“Inoticedthesamething,”
Mackhadsaid,noteventryingtohidehisconcern.“WantmetohaveJotalk
toher?”Jeffhadasked.Susieandhermomwere
close,butMackwantedtogettothebottomofthishimself.“I’llhandleit,butthanks.IfIthinkJoneedstoget
involved,I’llask.”Jeffhadslappedhimonthe
back.“Iknowyoulovemygirl,Mack,butsodowe.Ifyouneedhelp,allyouhavetodoisask.UnlikemybrotherMick,Idon’tmeddle.NeitherdoesJo,butwe’reonlyaphonecallawayifyouthinksomething’snotright.JustbecauseSusie’sagrownwomanandmarried,doesn’tmeanshe’snotstillour
child.”“Trustme,Iknowexactly
howstrongthebondis,”Macksaid,meaningitandgratefulforit,too.“YoutwowereeverybitasimportanttohercancerrecoveryasIwas.Sheneededusall.Shemayagain.”InMack’sopinion,
somethingdefinitelywasn’tright.Aftertwodaysofstaringatthebayand
showingnointerestinanything,SusiehaddemonstratedasuddensurgeofenergyrightaftermeetingSam’snephew,Bobby,onWednesday.TherewaslittledoubtinMack’smindthatthetwothingswereconnected.Afterparkingonaside
streetwhenhecouldn’tfindaspotalongMainoronShoreRoad,heheadedfortherealestateoffice.Ashe’d
expected,thelightswereburningbrightlydespitethelatenessofthehour.HecouldseeSusieatherdeskstaringatthephone.Takingadeepbreathandprayingforguidance,hewentinside,asmileplasteredonhisface.“Hereyouare,”hesaid
cheerfully,droppingakissonherforehead.“Ithoughtyou’dbehomebynow.Fridaynight’salwaysbeen
ourdatenight.”Sheflushedguiltily.“I
forgotallaboutitbeingFriday.Igotcaughtupinsomethinghere,”shesaid.“What?”heinquired
mildly.Shefrownedatthe
question.“Whythedoubtinyourvoice?YouknowIworklatesometimes.”“Ofcourseyoudo.Iwas
justcuriousaboutwhathad
keptyoutonight.Isthereabigdealpending?”“Somethinglikethat,”she
said,notmeetinghisgaze.Mackconcludedthat
dancingaroundthesubjectwasn’tgoingtogetanswers.Hesatinthechairbesideherdesk.“Suze,what’sgoingon?”“ItoldyouI’mworking.”“Itlookedtomeasifyou
mightbewaitingforthe
phonetoring.”Suddenlytheanswercametohim,thoughhedidn’tlikeit.“AreyouwaitingforSamtocallabouttakingalookatthathouse?”“Hesaidhewould,”she
replieddefensively.“GettingBobbysettledisimportant,sowhyhasn’thedoneit?”Sheregardedhimwithalarm.“Nothing’shappenedtoBobby,hasit?”“Bobby’sjustfineasfaras
Iknow.TheyhaddinnerwithKevinandShannaandthekidslastnight.WhenIspoketoSamearlierthisevening,hementionedthathe’ssigningBobbyupforT-ballinthemorning,thenNell’sgivinghimacookinglesson.”Forthefirsttimesincehe’d
arrived,therewasasparkofinterestinSusie’seyes.“How’dthathappen?”“IgatherSamthrew
himselfonCarrie’smercyandshesetitup.She’stakinglessonsfromNell,too.”“Ofcoursesheis,”Susie
said,asurprisingedgetohervoice.Mackknewthere’donce
beenafamilyrivalrybetweenSusieandJess,butthiswassomethingnew.“Hey,whytheattitude?”“He’ssingle.Hehasakid.
OfcourseCarriewouldlatch
ontohim,thesamewayshemadeherselfavailabletoNoahwhenhefirstgottotown.”Mackregardedherwith
shock.Inalltheyearshe’dknownherandthroughsomeverytoughtimes,he’dneverheardherbesomean-spirited,exceptperhapswhenhe’dstupidlyinvitedanex-girlfriendtoworkatthepaper.Eventhen,hiswife
hadstruggledhardtohideherdistasteforthewomanandhowmuchthesituationupsether.“Youknowperfectlywell
thatCarrieandAbbypitchedintohelpNoahgetsettledbecauseCaitlynwasstartingherinternshipatthehospitalinBaltimore,”hesaidquietly.“Therewasnothingmoretoit,certainlynotanythinglikewhatyou’reimplying.”
“You’resonaive,”Susiesaid.Mackfoundthewhole
conversationincreasinglypuzzling.IfSusiewasgoingdownthepathhefearedshemightbe,herjealousyofCarriewasaworrisomesign.“Sincewhendoyouhave
suchajadedattitudetowardCarrie?”heasked,keepinghistoneaslevelashecould.Sparkingafightwouldget
himnowhere.Shewincedatthequestion,
butdidn’trespond.Thatlefthimnochoicebuttobedirect.“Isitbecauseshe’s
spendingtimehelpingSamwithBobbyandyouwantedtobetheonetodothat?Ifso,Suze,that’saproblem.”Hetriedtoholdhergaze,
buteventuallyshesighedandlookedaway,thoughnot
beforehesawtearsforminginhereyes.Sheburiedherfaceinherhands.“I’mturningintosucha
witch,aren’tI?HowcanIbejealousofsomeonewho’sjusttryingtobenice?”Whenthetearsbeganto
fallinearnest,Mackgatheredherclose.“You’rethefurthestthingfromawitch.You’rejusthurtingrightnow.Iknowyou,babe.You’d
neversaythingslikethisifyouweren’t.”“Ican’tseemtostop
myself.TheseawfulthoughtskeepcomingtomeandIgetsoangry.Thankgoodnessit’syouandnotsomeoneelseinthefamily.They’dprobablywantmetogointotherapy.”WhenMackdidn’treply
rightaway,sheregardedhimwithdismay.“That’swhatyouwant,too,isn’tit?”
Ratherthanansweringdirectly,heasked,“Doyouthinktherapymighthelp?You’vebeenthroughalot.Notmanypeoplecouldhavehandleditaswellasyouhave.”“Youhave.Youwerea
rockthroughallofmycancertreatments.Youhandledeverycurvethatwasthrownatus.Evenwhenwefoundoutweweren’tgettingthe
baby,youweresoblastedstrong.Iwantedtobelikethat,butthisadoptionfiascowasthefinalstraw.Idon’thaveanyhopeorstrengthleftinme.”“Ofcourseyoudo.Giveit
time,Susie.Youcan’texpecttogothroughsomethinglikethiswithoutittakingatoll.Iwasprobablypushingtoohardforustotryagain,becauseIthoughtthatwould
help.Iwaswrong.Youneedtimetomourn.”“That’sexactlyit,”she
said,seizingonhiscomment.“I’mmourningthischildthatwasalmostours.WhenIlashoutatCarriethewayIdidjustnow,IcanhearthewordsasifsomeoneelseissayingthemandI’mhorrifiedatthespitefulness,butIcan’tseemtostop.”Shesighed.“MaybeIshouldseeWill.”
“That’syourdecision,butitmighthelptohaveanotherperspective.Imaybetooclosetothistogiveyouthesortofunbiasedsupportyouneed.”“I’llthinkaboutit,”she
promised.“Andnow,ifyou’renottotallyturnedoffbymymoodswings,howwouldyoufeelabouttakingmetodinner?It’snottoolateforourdatenight,isit?”
“It’snevertoolateformetospendaneveningwithyou,anyplaceyouwanttogo,”Macksaidreadily,relievedfornow.“Brady’s,Ithink.I’dlike
somewineandsomeexcellentrockfishandmaybeevenadecadentdessert.”Macksmiled.“Nowyou’re
talkingmylanguage.GreatfoodandadatewiththewomanIlovemorethan
anythinginthisworld.Let’sdoit.”Thoughshecastonelast
lookatthestill-silentphone,shegrabbedherpurseandlockedup.Justoutsideshelookedupathim.“HaveImentionedhowmuchIloveyouandhowluckyIamthatyou’rehanginginherewithme?”“Nochanceofmedoing
anythingelse,”heassured
her.“You’remyworld,Suze.Andwhetherweeverhavekidsorwedon’t,youwillalwaysbemorethanenough.Pleasetrytorememberthat.”
***
WhenCarriearrivedattheinninthemorningtopickupSamandBobby,therewasnosignofthem.HerauntJessfoundherpacinginthelobby.
“Thereyouare,”Jesssaid.“It’scrazyaroundherethisweekend.We’repacked,soI’vebeenhelpinginthekitchenanddiningroom,butI’vebeentryingtowatchforyou.Samwantedmetoaskifyoucouldpickthemupattheballfield.KevincamebyearlieranddroveSamandBobbytoT-ball.KevinthoughtitwouldbeeasierforBobbyifDaveyandJohnny
arrivedatthefieldwithhim.Sometimesmybigbrotherdemonstratesamazingsensitivity.”Shegrinned.“OfcourseitwasprobablyShanna’sidea.”Carrielaughed.“Morethan
likely.Thanksforpassingalongthemessage.I’dbettergetoverthere.”“Notbeforeyouhaveacup
ofcoffeewithme,”Jesssaid.“CallGramandtellher
you’rerunninglate.Shewon’tmind.Ispoketoherafewminutesagoandsaidyoumightbe.”Carrieregardedher
suspiciously.“YoutoldGramI’dbelate?”“Isaiditwasapossibility,
becauseofhavingtogobytheballfield,”herauntsaidblithely.Carrietriedtoprotestany
furtherdelay,butJesshada
firmgriponherelbowassheguidedherintothebusydiningroom.“There’satableoverbythewindow.I’llgetthecoffeeandjoinyouinaminute.”“Jess,Ireallydon’thave
time,”Carrieargued,thenglimpsedhermotheratthetableJesshadpointedout.“Ah,Isee.Anambush.”Jesslaughed.“Youcan
choosetoseeitthatwayif
youwant,butItendtodomybigsister’sbidding,especiallyaftershe’shandedmeanice,fatdividendcheckfromtheinvestmentsshe’smadeforme.”AsCarriecrossedthe
room,shenoticedhermomwasdistractedlystirringherowncoffee.Sinceshetookneithercreamnorsugarinit,itwasclearlyanervousgesturejusttopassthetime.
“Hi,Mom.You’reoutbrightandearlyonaSaturdaymorning,”Carriesaid,givingherahug.“How’dyoumanagethat?”“TracetookPatricktothe
ballfield.HewantstoplayT-ball,eventhoughhecanbarelyholdthebat.”“So,ratherthantaking
advantageofalittletimetoyourself,youjusthappenedtocomebyhere?”
“IhadacheckforJess,butthenIheardyouwerestoppingbytopickupSamWinslowandIwashopingtocatchaglimpseofbothofyou.ApparentlyImissedSam,buthereyouare.”“Sorryyou’renotgettinga
twofer,”Carrieteased.“AndwhywouldyouwanttomeetSam,anyway?”“TheO’Brienrumormill
hasbeenbuzzing.Iwantedto
seeiftherewasanytruthtowhatIwashearing.”ShegaveCarrieachidinglook.“Youmighthavementionedyourselfthatyou’dmetaniceyoungman.”“Everybodyismakingway
toomuchofthis,”Carriesaid.“Sam’ssingleandhe’sattractive.However,hejuststartedanewjobandhejustassumedcustodyofhisnephewafteraterrible
tragedy.I’msurehe’snotlookingforarelationshipanymorethanIam.Webotharewaytoobusytryingtogetourlivesontrack.”“Andyetyou’retaking
timethismorningtohaveNellteachyouhowtocook,”Abbysaid.Shegrinned.“Clevermove,bytheway.”“Itwasn’tsomesortof
ploy,”Carrieclaimed.“Samcan’tcook.Hehasasix-year-
oldwhoneedstoeat.”“Verylogical,”Abbysaid,
hereyessparkling.“Andyou?Wheredidyoursuddendesiretolearnyourwayaroundakitchencomefrom?Uptillnowyou’vebeenperfectlycontenttotakeyourmealswithfamilyoratthepuborSally’s.AndIknowyou’dhaveatonoffrequentdinerpointsatPaniniBistroorthepizzaplaceifthey
offeredthem.”“Andwhosetthatexample
forme?”Carrieretorted,drawingastartledlaughfromhermom.“Touché.Iamamasterof
takeout.Thankfullythathasn’tdrivenTraceawayyet.Heknewwhathewasgettingwhenhemarriedme,anditwasn’tgourmetcooking.”Sinceshe’dmanagedto
one-uphermomanddoubted
she’dpullitoffagain,Carriestoodup.“Mom,I’dlovetostayandchat,butIreallydoneedtopickupSamandBobbyandgetovertoGram’s.”“Fine.Go,butIexpectto
meetthemverysoon.Ifyoudon’tbringthemaround,I’llgolookingforthem.AtleastIknowwheretofindthelotofyouonSaturdaymornings.You’llbeinNell’skitchen.”
Shegrinned.“Howconvenient!”“Weren’tyoubannedfrom
Nell’skitchenalongtimeago?”“OnlyifItrytogetnear
thestove,”Abbyretorted,laughing.“Nowgo.Havefun.”“Loveyou,”Carriesaid,
kissinghercheek.“Hey,”Abbycalledwhen
shewasjustafewfeetaway.
Carrieturnedback.“Ihearyou’vedecidedto
stayintown.I’msogladaboutthat.Weallare.”“Boy,itdidn’ttake
GrandpaMicklongtospreadthatword.”“Isuspecthewastexting
beforeheleftyourhouse,”Abbyreplied.“Hesaiditwasthebestnewshe’dhadinweeks.”“I’mgladIcouldmakehis
day.”Itremainedtobeseenif
thedecisionwasgoingtoworkouthalfaswellforher,butshewasdefinitelyhopeful.
***
Kevin’soffertopickthemupforT-ballhadbeenastrokeofgenius,SamthoughtashewatchedBobbyshadowing
theolder,veryfriendlyDaveyonthefield.SoonBobbywastalkingtootherboyshisownage,takinghisturnatbatandlisteningcloselytowhateverthecoacheshadtosay.Ofcourse,Samalso
noticedthatBobbyneverwentmorethanacoupleofminuteswithoutglancinghisway.Withsomekids,hesuspectedthatwouldbenomorethanaquickcheckfor
parentalapproval,butinBobby’scase,Samhadafeelingitwasanotherexampleoftheboy’sneedtoreassurehimselfthatSamwascloseby.ItwasBobby’steam’slast
at-batwhenhefeltCarrie’spresencenearby.Heturnedandgrinnedather.“We’realmostdone.”“How’shedoing?”“Thekidhasprettygood
eye-handcoordination.He’shadmorehitsthantheotherkidsontheteam.That’smadehimaninstanthero.”Sheglancedaroundthe
fieldandspottedBobbywaitingforhisturnatbat.Hewaslaughingwithanotherlittleboy.Forthefirsttimesinceshe’dseteyesonhim,helookedlikeeveryotherchildhisagehavingagreattimeattheballfield.
“WhoseideawasitforhimtoplayT-ball?”sheasked.“His.Heaskedifthere
wereteams.IcheckedwithKevinandhereweare.”“He’sobviouslyplayed
before.”“Apparently,”Samsaid.
“NotthatIknewmuchabouthislifebeforeIgotcustody.Thankfullyhe’sstartingtospeakupaboutthethingshelikestodo.”
Carriegavehimacuriouslook.“Youknewabouthisfondnessforthejunglegym.”“Mysistersentpictures
fromtimetotime.Itwasoneofherwaysofkeepingthelinesofcommunicationopen.Whenwespoke,wetendedtobuttheads,sowedidn’tdoitoften.”“Thatsurprisesme,”Carrie
said.“Especiallysinceshetrustedyoutotakecustodyof
Bobby.”“Itsurprisedme,too,”Sam
confessed.“Ithinkmaybeshethoughtitwouldnevercometothat.”Hesighed.“IguessnowI’llneverknowwhatshewasthinking.”“I’msorry.”“Yeah,me,too.”ThebatterbeforeBobby
wascalledoutatfirstbase,andthegameendedbeforehecouldgotobat.Hedropped
thebatandrantoSam,hisfaceflushedwithexcitement.“Didyouseeme?Igottwo
hits!”“Isaw,”Samsaid.“You’re
prettygood.”“Notjustprettygood,”
Bobbycorrected.“I’mgreat!”“Well,definitelynolackof
confidencewhenitcomestoT-ball,”Samsaiddryly.“Ihaven’theardyousayhitoCarrie,yet.”
“Hi,”Bobbysaid,instantlyshy.“Ionlysawthelastcouple
ofminutesofthegame,butIheardverygoodthingsabouthowwellyouplayed,”Carriesaid.“Maybeyoucouldcome
nextweek,”Bobbysuggested.“I’dlovethat.MaybeI
will.”Sheruffledhishair.“Areyoureadytolearnto
cook?”Bobbylookeddoubtful,so
Samsteppedin.“Icertainlyam,especiallysinceyoutoldmewegettoeatwhatwecook.”Bobby’sexpression
brightenedatonce.“Wedo?ThenIhopewe’relearningtomakecookies.”Kevinapproachedjustthen
withDaveyandJohnnyintow.“We’regoingtoSally’s
formilkshakes,Bobby.Youwanttocomealong?”HeglancedatSam.“IcanbringhimbyGram’safterthat.”SamwatchedBobby
closely.Atfirsttheideaofapostgametreatseemedtointeresthim,butthenhegazedupatSam.“Youwouldn’tbethere?”“Ican’tgo,buddy.I’m
goingwithCarrieforthatcookinglesson,butyoucan
goifyouwantto.”Bobbytookhishandand
heldontight.“No.Iwanttogowithyou.”Kevingavehiman
understandinglook.“Noproblem.Maybenexttime.”HegaveCarrieaquickkissonthecheek.“Don’twearGramout.”“It’smorelikelytobethe
otherwayaround,”Carriesaid.
WhenKevinandhisboyshadgone,SamrealizedBobbywasregardingCarriewithcuriosity.“HowcomeKevinkissed
you?Isheyourboyfriend?IthoughtShannawashiswife.”Carrielaughed.“She
absolutelyis.He’smyuncle.Heandmymomarebrotherandsister.”“Didyoueverlivewith
him?”“Justforalittlewhileat
mygrandpa’shousewhenwefirstmovedbacktoChesapeakeShores.Thenmymomgotmarriedagainandwemovedtoanotherhouse.”“Oh,”Bobbysaid,his
expressionthoughtfulasifhewastryingtofittogetherapuzzle.“Youguysready?”Carrie
asked.
“Wecan’twait,right,Bobby?”“Iguess,”hesaid,
soundingdoubtful.Carrieleaneddownand
whisperedsomethinginhisearthatmadehimsmile.“Whatdidyoutellhim?”
Samaskedastheywalkedtothecar.“Thatnomatterwhatwe
cooked,thereareboundtobecookies.AndifIknowGram,
she’llhaveawholeplatefreshfromtheovenwhenwegetthere.”“Isn’tthatgreat?”Bobby
askedexcitedly.“Bestnewsever,”Sam
agreed.Hewasn’tholdingoutalot
ofhopethatwhateverheandCarrielearnedtomakewouldbereceivedquitesoenthusiastically.
***
Samglancedacrossthesmallbutcher-blockislandinNell’skitchenandsmiledatthefrownofconcentrationonCarrie’sfaceasshedicedvegetablesintoperfectlymatchedpieces.“Needaruler?”he
inquired.Shescowledathim.“Gram
saidtheyshouldbethesame
sizesotheycookthroughevenly.”“I’mnotsureshemeant
youhadtobequitethatprecise,”hesaid,grinningashegesturedtohisownhaphazardlydicedveggies.“Iguesswe’llseewhenshe
andBobbygetbackfromcheckingoutthegardenandpickingthefreshherbsweneed,”Carriesaid,finallyputtingdownherknifeand
regardingherneatpilesofvegetableswithobvioussatisfaction.Samglancedoutthe
windowandsawNellleaningdowntolistentoBobbyastheywalkedtowardthehouse.Tohissurpriseandrelief,Bobbyhadbeenchatteringnonstopeversincehe’dmetNell.Eitheritwashernaturalwarmthorthechocolate-chipcookiesjust
outoftheoven,butshe’dwonBobbyoveratonce.Carriefollowedthe
directionofhisgazeandsmiled.“Theymakequiteapair,don’tthey?”“Isshethiswaywithall
kids,sortofanaturalPiedPiper?”“Prettymuch.Whenmy
grandmotherleftmygrandfatherwhilemymomwasateenagerandher
siblingswerestillprettyyoung,Grammovedinandtookover.Therewerefiveofthemanditcouldhavewornherout,especiallywithGrandpaMickontheroadwithworksomuch.Instead,shealwayssaidthatbeingaroundthemandthegreat-grandchildrenwho’vecomesincehaskeptheryoung.Shehasthisfreespiritthatallofusappreciate.Andwatching
herfallinlovewithDillonalloveragainwhentheyreconnectedinDublinwasaninspiration.”“It’snicetoknowthat
thingsdoworkout,evenifit’snotonthetimetableweanticipated.”“That’swhatshesays,that
lovehasitsowntimetable,andweneedtopayattentiontoit.Noteveryonegetsthatsecondchance.”
Samstudiedherandnoticedasadnesshehadn’tseensincethatfirstnightwhenhe’dspottedheratthebaratO’Brien’s.“Howdoyoufeelabout
secondchances?”“Givenhowoftenwe
managetomessupourownlives,I’mallforthem,”shesaid.“You?”“Samething.Haveyou
messedupyourlife?Itseems
tomeyouhaveitall—abig,wonderfulfamily,awholetownthat’spracticallyafamilybusinessinsomecrazyway.You’rebeautiful.”“I’llacceptthe
compliment,butthoseareblessingsthatIreallyhadnothingtodowith.Mylookscanbeattributedtogreatgenes.ThistownisGrandpaMick’sbaby.Thefamily,well,that’sNell’sdoing.
Evenwhentherehavebeentensions,she’smadecertainthatweallsticktogether.It’sniceknowingthatkindofsupportisalwaystherewhenweneedit.”“Isthatwhyyoucame
backhere?IheardyouwerelivinginEurope.”“Inaway,”shesaid.“This
ishome,andIdoloveithere.”“Areyouplanningtostay
oristhereanotherglamorousjobonthehorizon.I’veheardfromacoupleofpeopleyouwereinvolvedinthefashionindustry.”“Allbehindme,”shesaid.
“Itturnedoutitwasn’trightforme.”Hegrinned.“Youworethe
clotheswell.”HeglancedatthebrightblueT-shirtandcaprisshewaswearingtoday,alongwithapairofflip-flops
withabigwhitedaisybetweenhertoes.Nomoresexyheels.Nodesignerwardrobe.“Isthisanewlook?”“Youhaveagoodeye,”
shesaid.“IdecidedIneededsomemorepracticalclothesforthelifeI’mlivingnow.IlovedsomeofthethingsIwasabletobuyatadiscountbecauseofmyconnectiontoadesigner,butIwouldhave
hadheartfailureifI’dsplatteredgreaseonthem.”ShegesturedtowardtheapronNellhadgivenher,whichwascoveredalreadywithvariousstains.“Lookatme.Isurewouldn’thavemadeoneofthoseperfecthousewivesportrayedinthoseoldTVsitcoms.”Sheglancedhiswayandcaughtapuzzledlook.“Youknow,theoneswhocouldcookentire
mealsinadressandheelswithoutgettingathingonthem.”“Ah,yes,”hesaidwith
dawningunderstanding.“Well,justsoyouknow,youlooklikeamillionbucksintheseclothes,too.”Sheblushed.“Sam
Winslow,areyouflirtingwithme?”“JustcallingitlikeIsee
it,”hesaid,thenwinked.
“I’vealsoheardthatalittleflirtingisgoodforyourhealth.Ifthatblushonyourcheeksisanyindication,itdefinitelyhasanimpactonbloodflow.”Shelaughed.“Inever
thoughtofitquitethatway.I’llhavetobrushuponmyflirtingskills.”Asuddenimageofher
flirtingwithanymanwhocrossedherpathgaveSam
pause.Andthefactthatitdidscaredhiminawaythatlittleelseinhislifehad,Theonlythingscarierwasknowingthatastrickyasthepastthreeweeksofadjustingtobeingadadhadbeen,hestillhadyearsinthatroletofigureout.Thatthoughthadhim
movingquicklytothedoortoholditopenforNellandBobby,relievedtohavea
distraction.HecouldfeelCarrie’spuzzledgazefortherestofthemorningashefocusedhisattentiononmasteringNell’sinstructionsandansweringherquestions.Whentheyfinallysatdown
atthebigkitchentabletosamplewhatthey’dcooked,hesmiledwhenBobbytookhisfirsttasteoftheIrishstewandlookedup,hisfacealightwithsurprise.
“Thisisreallygood,”hesaid,alreadyspooningupmore.“It’slikethestewwehadwhenwegottotown.”“Itis,”Carrieagreed,
lookingtriumphant.Shemethisgaze.“Howaboutthat?Wedidn’tmessitup.”“YoubothgetanAplus,”
Nellsaidapprovingly.“Neverhadbetter,noteven
backinDublin,”Dillonadded.
Samstudiedtheirexpressions,stillharboringdoubtsabouttheirsuccess.Eventuallyhetookatentativetaste.Astheflavorsofthebeef,freshherbsandvegetablesburstonhistongue,heregardedthestewwithamazement.“WhoknewIcouldcook?”
hesaid,anunmistakablehintofwonderinhisvoice.Nellchuckled.“Boy,
you’rejustscratchingthesurface.Youcan’tliveonIrishstewalone,evenasgoodasitis.Nextweekwe’llmoveontomychickenanddumplings.Nowthosedumplingsarethetestthatseparatesthemenfromtheboys.”Carriemurmured
somethingunderherbreaththatdrewasharplookfromNell.
“What’sthat,girl?Speakup.”“IsaidUncleKevin’s
dumplingsareprettylightandfluffy.”Nellgaveherachiding
look.“Youmeancomparedtomine?”Carrieshrugged.“Hedoes
seemtohaveamagicaltouch.”“Andwhere’dhegetthat
from,Iaskyou?”Nell
inquiredwithatouchofindignation.“I’mguessinghelearnedit
fromyou,”Samsaidquickly.Nellgaveanodof
satisfaction.“Ofcoursehedid,”shesaid,thenfrowned.“Butdoyouknowtheungratefulbratwon’ttellmewhathe’sdonetoimproveonmyrecipe.”“Soyou’readmittinghis
arebetter?”Carriepressed.
“Maybeasmidgen,”Nellconceded,“butifyoutellhimIsaidthat,I’llcallyoualiar.”SamnoticedthatBobby
wasthoroughlyengrossedinhismeal,thankgoodness.BecausewhiletherestofthemmightbewiseenoughtokeepNell’sadmissiontothemselves,ifBobbyheardit,he’dblurtitoutwithoutasecondthought.“Hey,Bobby,”Samsaid,
justtoseeifhewasasdistractedashe’dhoped.Bobbyglancedupfromhis
food.“Chickenanddumplingsnextweek.Iknow.”Samwinced.“And?”“Kevin’sarebetterbut
we’renottelling.”Dillon’sboomoflaughter
filledthekitchen.HereachedoverandsqueezedNell’shand.“That’llteachyouto
saythingsyoudon’twantrepeated,mydarlin’Nell.”Atwinkleinhereyes,she
focusedonBobby.“HowmanycookieswouldittaketomakesureyouforgetwhatIsaid?”Bobby’sfacelitup.“Ican
haveallIwant?”Carrieintervened.“No
bribery,Gram.”Nellsatbackwithasigh.
“IsupposeI’lljusthaveto
hopethatBobbyhasaveryshortmemoryorthatheandKevindon’tcrosspaths.”“Somethingtellsmeyou’re
doomedonbothscores,”Carriesaid.“Kidsalwaysrememberthethingsyoudon’twantthemtoandKevin’slikelytobeatBobby’sT-ballpracticeeverySaturday.”AshehadatKevinand
Shanna’s,Samlistenedwith
growingamazementtothebanteratthetable.Thiswaswhatitwouldbeliketohavearealfamily,connectednotjustbythechanceofDNA,butbygenuinecaring.Forthefirsttimeinhislife,hewantedthat,notjustbecauseitwaswhatBobbyhadlostanddeservedtohaveagain,butforhimself.Also,forthefirsttime,hecouldappreciatejusthowmucheffortLaurel
hadputintotryingtogivehimsomesemblanceofnormalcyamidthechaostheirparents’dysfunctionhadcreated.
9
OnMondaymorningCarriedraggedherselfoutofbedattheungodlyhourof5:00a.m.toshower,dressandmakethedrivetotheHappily-Ever-AfterDay-careCenter.Atleastthesunwasstillcomingupfairlyearly,soshewasn’t
drivingthewindingroadinthepitch-darkofwinter.Atthecentershefoundthe
lightsonandJulieandtwootherwomenbusymakingsandwichesforlunch.Juliegaveheranapprovinglook,madequickintroductions,thennoddedtowardashelfwhereaboxofdisposablegloveshadbeenleftopen.“Getbusy,”Juliesaid.“We
needtohavethesemade
beforethenextroundofkidsstartstoarrive.Lucyhastheearlyarrivalsentertainedfornow,butshe’llneedhelpassoonasitstartsgettingcrazyinhere.”Studyingtheturkey,
tomatoandlettucesandwichesbeingassembled,Carriepitchedinandwenttowork,thendaredtoask,“Wouldn’tpeanutbutterandjellybealoteasierandmore
popular?”“Peanutallergy,”Julie
explained.“Weknowwehaveoneboywhohasit.Onceweopenthatjar,whoknowswhomightgettheirhandsonit.Whytakechances?Andwetrytosticktohealthyoptions,notpopularones.”“Weshakethingsupwith
grilledcheeseandtunaonpitabread,”Lucysaid,
joiningthemandreportingthatthethreeearlyarrivalswereoccupiedwithinviewwithpicturebooks.“It’sneverboringandtheyoungerkidswillprettymuchtryanythingonce.Foracoupleofthem,themealtheygetherewillbethehealthiestonetheygetallday.Addinsomefruitandaddedveggiesatsnacktimeandtheygetdecentnutritionfromus.It
makestheolderonesmorealert,too,sowecanactuallygetinafewlessonsduringthedaywhenthelittlestonesaredownfortheirnaps.”“Whatagesdoyouhave?”
Carrieasked.“Inoticedsomeolderkidsherewithatutortheotherday.”“Wehavesixuptotheage
ofeightwhocomehereafterschool.Duringthesummerthey’reoftenhereallday.
They’vebeenwithussincetheyweretoddlers.Iwon’ttakebabies,”Juliesaid.“Ijustdon’thavethestaff,butwe’lltakethemasearlyastwoaslongasthey’rereasonablypottytrained.”JustthenaloudNo!carried
fromthelobby.Julieshookherhead,her
expressionresigned.“Lucy?”“I’monit,”herdaughter
said.
“Problemchild?”Carrieguessed.“Shejuststartedherea
weekagoandhasbig-timeseparationanxiety,atleastuntilwecangethersointerestedinsomething,shedoesn’trealizehermomhasleft.Oncetheotherkidsarehere,she’sprettygood.”ThinkingofBobby,Carrie
asked,“Howdoyoudealwiththeseparationthing?I
haveafriendwhojustassumedfullcustodyofhisnephewaftertheparentsdiedinanaccident.Sohe’sinanewtownwithanunclehebarelyknows.Inoticedtheotherdaythathe’snotlettinghisuncleoutofhissight.That’sgoingtobeaproblemwhenschoolstarts.”“Totallyunderstandable,”
Juliesaid.“Howoldishe?Doeshehavefriends?”
“He’ssixandhe’sstartedmakingsomefriends.”“Thesameage?”“Acoupleareolder,buthe
startedplayingT-ballonSaturdayandthatlookspromising.Heseemedtofitinprettyquickly,thoughthat’swhenInoticedhewaskeepingacloseeyeonhisunclethewholetime.”“Ifhe’ssocializingthat
wellalready,I’llbethe’llbe
fine,”oneoftheotherwomenmakingsandwichespipedup,thengaveashrug,herexpressionwry.“LotsofpsychologyclassesbeforeIhadtoquitcollege.Iknowjustenoughtobedangerous.”“Alicia,right?”Carriesaid,
determinedtokeepasmanynamesaspossiblestraightfromthebeginning.She’dbeenamasteratitduringhercareerinfashion.
RememberingnameswasthefirststepingreatPR.Alicianodded.“Listentoher,”Juliesaid.
“Imayhavebeenatthisalongtime,butAliciadoeshavetheadvantageofallthoseclasses.Oneofthesedayswe’regoingtoconvincehertofinishherdegreeandhangouthershingleinchildpsychology.OrI’llputheronstaffrighthereandbragabout
her.”Carrienoticedthatthe
womenhadaneasyrapportandademeanorthatwouldbewarmandwelcomingwiththechildren.WhenLucyreturnedwithalittlegirlwhosefacewastearstained,Aliciarushedovertogiveherahug.“We’resogladyou’re
here,”shetoldthechild.“Wanttocomewithmeand
drawapicture?”“No!”“Fingerpaints?”Alicia
suggested,evenasJuliewinced.“Okay,”thegirlsaidwitha
sparkofinterest.“Besureshewearsa
smockoverthatprettydress,”Juliecalledafterthem,thensighed.“Thepersonwhoinventedfingerpaintingshouldbemadetocleanupa
daycareattheendofthedayforayear.IswearI’dbanitfromthepremisesifIcould.”“No,youwouldn’t,”Lucy
said,givingherahug.“Youareinchargehere,soyoucouldeasilytossallthepaintsinthegarbageandnevermentiontheactivityagain.”Julie’sexpression
brightened.“Icould,couldn’tI?”“Andletallthosesmocks
youboughtgotowaste?Comeon,Mom,youknowthekidsloveallthosebrightcolorsandgettingmessy.Nothingonearthmakesyouhappierthanaroomfilledwithsmilingfaces.”Threemorechildren
arrivedinrapidsuccession.Theadultsmadequickworkofgettingthemsettledwithtoysorotherage-appropriateactivitiesbeforethenext
wavearrived.Byseven-thirtytheroomwasfilledwithnoisy,butdefinitelycheerful,chaos.BynineCarrie’sclothes
werestreakedwithfingerpaint,andherhair,whichshe’dpinnedatopherhead,hadtumbledtohershoulders.ButshewasashappyasthosechildrenLucyhaddescribed.She’dreadatleastadozenstories,helpedclumsyfingers
playwithblocksanddoledoutpraiseforunidentifiableartprojects.Afterlunch,withthelittlest
childrendownfornaps,andotherslookingatpicturebooksduringtheirownquiettime,shefinallyhadaminutetodrawinadeepbreath.“Howareyoudoing?”
Julieasked.“Istheindoctrinationbyfirehelpingordestroyingthiscrazy
impulseofyours?”“Iloveit,”Carrie
respondedwithouthesitation.Juliesmiled.“Thenthere
maybehopeforyou.You’llbebacktomorrow?OrWednesday?Wedidn’tsettleonaschedule.”“Tomorrow,”Carriesaidat
once,eagertolearnallshecouldasfastasshecould.Forthefirsttimein
months,shewasactually
excitedaboutgettingupinthemorning,evenifitwasat5:00a.m.whennosensiblepersonshouldbeexpectedtobeawake.
***
Sinceshedidn’twanttorevealherplanstothewholefamilyjustyetandithadbeenLuke’sideainthefirstplace,assoonasshe’d
showeredandchanged,Carrieheadedtothepub.ItwasstillearlyenoughtobedesertedandshefoundLuke,asexpected,behindthebar.Hestudiedhercuriously.
“Something’sdifferent.”“I’vehadaverygood
day,”shesaid.“Haveyou,now?Well,it’s
definitelyagreedwithyou.Yourfaceisglowingandyoureyesarebright.And
there’salovelystreakofsomethingthatlookslikebluepaintinyourhair.Whatwassospecialabouttoday?”Carriereachedforherhair,
regrettingthatshe’dsimplytwisteditintoalooseknotagain,ratherthanwashingitassheprobablyshouldhave.“Where?”sheaskedLuke.“It’sthestrandthat’s
pulledlooseandcurledalongyourneck.IfIdidn’tknow
youbetter,I’dthinkyouweremakingsomesortofrebelliousfashionstatement,thekindmeanttodriveyourgrandfathertodistraction.”“Hardly,”shesaid,then
shrugged.“Oh,well,it’llwashout.”Lukestaredatherwith
feignedshock.“Whoareyouandwhat’shappenedtomyperfectlygroomed,fashion-forwardcousin?You’renot
rushinghometodealwithitrightnow?”“Nope,”shesaid,grinning.
“Thisisthenewme,relaxedandtakinglifeasitcomes.”“Nowthat’safineattitude,
ifyouaskme,”hesaid.“Whatbroughtiton?”Sheextractedhispromise
thatonpainofdeathhe’dneverrevealawordoftheirconversation.“Bartender’s
confidentiality,”heintonedseriously.“You’vegotit.”“Itookyouradvice.”“Whatadviceisthat?I
handoutsomuchofitandI’mnotusedtoanyonetakingitseriously.”“Maybetherestofitis
suspect,butthiswasrightontarget.I’mvolunteeringataday-carecentertoseeifIlikeitandtolearneverythingIcanaboutpossiblyrunning
myown.IevensignedupfortwoonlineclassestheownerrecommendedItake.”“Now,there’sabitofnews
worthcelebrating,”hesaidatonce,tappinghisglassofsodawithherglassofwine.“Judgingbythewayyoulook,I’mguessingyou’refindingthatit’sagoodfit.”“It’sthebest,”shetoldhim
enthusiastically.“Theworkishard.Thereisahugeamount
ofresponsibility,butI’veneverbeenhappier.Iactuallycan’twaittogetbacktheretomorrow.”“Nodifficultchildrento
ruinitforyou?”“Sure,thereareproblem
kidsor,Ishouldsay,kidswhohaveproblemsfromtimetotime,butnothingIcan’thandle.”Shehesitated,thenamended,“Atleastsofar.”“Tellmeeverything.”
Shedescribedhowshe’ddiscoveredthedaycare,stoppedinandmetJulieandLucyandaskedforadvice.“IgotawholelotmorethanI’deverimagined,”shesaid.“Julie’sincredible.It’snotjustthatshehasawealthofinformationtoshare,butshecaresalmostasmuchasIdoaboutmakingsureI’mnotmakingamistake.Notformysake,ofcourse,sinceshe
doesn’tevenknowme,butforanykidswhomightbeplacedinmycare.Injustoneday,I’vealreadylearnedsomuch.I’malsobeginningtoseehowmuchIdon’tknow.”“Andthebluepaint?”Shesmiled.“Someofthe
kidsarealittleaggressivewiththefingerpaints,”shesaid,thenshrugged.“It’llwashout.”Luketappedherglass
again.“Andthatsortofacceptanceiswhatwillmakeyouverygoodatthis,ifitturnsouttobetherightcareerforyou.”“Ialreadyknowitis,”
Carriesaideagerly.“ButI’mnotrushingintoanything.Foronething,Juliewon’tteachmethenutsandboltstillshe’ssatisfiedthatI’mnotgoingtomessup.Foranother,thisexperienceis
invaluable.”“Whenwillyoutelltherest
ofthefamily?”Shesighedheavilyatthe
question.“Noidea.Notyet,that’sforsure.GrandpaMickwillthinkI’mgraspingatstraws.Forsomeonewho’salwaysbeenahugesupporteroftheschoolsandeducation,he’llviewthisasglorifiedbabysittingandawasteofmytalents.Icanhearhimnow.”
Toherregret,Lukenodded.“Icanhearhimdoingjustthat.Nothinglessthanloftyambitionsforhisfamily.Mysidewasmuchthesame.Canyoutunehimout?”“Today?Probablynot,”
sheconcededwithregret.“OnceI’m100percentcertainI’montherightpath,Iwon’tlethimintimidateme.”“Goodforyou.”He
glancedtowardthedoor.“Youmightwanttobraceyourself.Iseehimoutsidechattingwithsomeonerightnow.”“Idon’tsupposeyou’dlet
mesneakoutthroughthekitchen?”sheaskedwistfully.“OfcourseIwould,but
you’dhateyourselfforrunningaway.”“Surprisingly,notthat
much,”shereplied,butshe
didstaywhereshewas.“Notaword,remember?Youpromised.”“Hewon’thearthisfrom
me,”Lukeagreed.“Butdon’twaittoolongtofillhimin,Carrie.It’llonlyannoyhimwhenhedoesfindout.”Noquestionaboutit,she
thoughttoherself,thenmanagedabrightandhopefullyinnocentsmileashergrandparentscame
throughthedoor.Shestoodupandgavethembothhugs.“Sorrytobolt,butIhave
thingstodo,”shesaid,thinkingofthereadingsheneededtodoforheronlineclasses.She’dorderedthebooksfromtheuniversitybookstoreandthey’dbeenonherdoorstepearlier.Shecouldhardlywaittocheckthemoutanddoherfirstassignment.Herenthusiasm
wasafarcryfromthedayswhenshe’dhatedwastingtimeonstudyingincollege.Hergrandfatherregarded
herwithsuspicion.“You’vebarelytouchedyourwine.”“Notime,”shesaid.“Love
you.”“Enjoyyourevening,”her
grandmothercalledafterher.“Ihopeit’sahotdatethathasyourushingoff.”“Hotdate?”GrandpaMick
echoedindignantly.“What’swrongwithyou,woman?Youdon’tsaysomethinglikethattoourgranddaughter.”“Youdon’t,”shecorrected.
“I’mtherealist.Ifwewanthertobetrulyhappy,sheneedssomeoneinherlife.”Carriedidn’tlingertohear
whathergrandfatherhadtosaytothat,butshehadahunchhergrandmotherwasabouttogetanearful.Better
GrandmaMeganthanher!
***
SamlookeddownintoBobby’stearstainedfaceandfelttheurgetoshedafewtearsofhisown.They’djustfinisheddinneratSally’s—anotherburgerandfriesforBobby—whenSamhadtriedtoexplainthatheneededtogetBobbyenrolledinschool
firstthinginthemorningandthenhehadtogobacktowork.“Idon’twanttogoto
schoolhere,”Bobbyhadshouted,drawingstaresfromtheothercustomers.“Iwanttogoathomewithmyfriends.”“Youhavefriendshere,”
Samremindedhim,unabletokeepanoteofdesperationoutofhisvoice.
“They’renotmyrealfriends.Imissmyoldfriends.ImissMommyandDaddy.Iwanttogohome.”Samknewthatdeepdown
Bobbyunderstoodthatsimplywasn’tpossible.HeevenknewthatBobbyhadstartedtolikeChesapeakeShores.He’djustbumpedupagainsttherealityofthehugechangeinhislife.Samseemedtodothesamethingabouta
milliontimesaday.Theshockofitstillhadn’twornoff,andhehadn’tcomeclosetodealingwithhisownfeelingsaboutthelossofhissister.FocusedonBobbynow,
Samurgedhimoutoftheirboothandheadedoutside,hopingtofinishthisdelicatenegotiationwithsomedegreeofprivacy.HetookBobby’shandandcrossedthestreetto
theplaygroundonthetowngreen.Hechoseasecludedbenchunderamajesticoldoaktreeandsatdown,thenpattedtheseatbesidehim.Foraminute,itlookedasif
Bobbymightstubbornlyresist,hislittlejawsetandmoreofthoseheartbreakingtearsrollingdownhischeeks,buteventuallyheheavedasighandclimbedontothebench.Hedid,however,keep
somedistancebetweenhimselfandSam.Flyingbytheseatofhis
pants,Samsaidquietly,“Youknowyouliveherenowwithme.Iknowhowconfusingit’sbeenandwhatahugechangeitis,butwe’reinthistogether.”“Butyou’regoingto
work,”Bobbysaid,lookinglostandscared.“WhatwillIdo?”
“Inanothercoupleofweeks,you’llstartschool,you’llmeetlotsandlotsofnewfriends,andyou’llbesobusyyouwon’tevenhavetimetothinkaboutme.”“Whatabouttomorrow?”Sammadeanimpulsive
decision,oneheprayedthatMackwouldn’tobjectto.“Youcancometothenewspaperofficewithmetomorrow,ifyouwantto.
Youcanbringyourbooksandyourgames.”Bobby’ssilencesuggested
hewasconsideringtheidea.“Iguessthatwouldbeokay,”hesaideventually,thoughhedidn’tsoundveryhappyaboutit.“Wouldyouratherspend
thedaywithDaveyandJohnny?”Samasked.“IcancheckwithShannaandKevintoseewho’stakingcareof
themandmaybeworkthatout.”Bobbyfellsilent,then
heavedasigh.“Thatmightbeokay.”ButwhenSamcalled
ShannaandlearnedthatHenrywascaringforhisyoungersiblings,hecouldn’tbringhimselftoaskthatBobbybeaddedtothemix.WhileDaveymightnotbeaproblem,Johnnyandthebaby
wouldbeenoughofahandfulfortheteenager.“Areyoulookingfor
somethingforBobbytodotomorrow,soyoucanwork?”Shannaaskedperceptively.“How’dyouguess?”“Itwasboundtocomeup,”
shesaid.“CallCarrie.She’llbemorethanwillingtopitchin,I’msure.”“Shedidofferwhenwe
firstmet,”Samconceded,
thoughhedidn’tliketheideaoftakingadvantageofher.“Well,thereyougo.She’s
wonderfulwithkidsandBobbyalreadyknowsher.”Samglancedupand
spottedCarriecrossingthegreen.“Thanksforthesuggestion,”hetoldShanna.“I’llcheckintoit.”JustthenitseemedBobby
sawher,too,andcalledout.“Hi,Carrie!”heyelled,
scramblingdownandrunningacrossthegreentomeether.“Ijusthadahamburgerfordinner.That’smyfavorite.”Shelaughed.“Ithought
pizzawasyourfavorite.”Bobbynodded.“They’re
boththebestfoodever!”Samwincedather
reproachfulexpressionassheapproached.“Don’tlookatmelikethat.I’mweak.WhatcanIsay?Hamburgersand
pizzaaremyfavorites,too.”“Mine,too,whenitcomes
rightdowntoit,”sheadmitted,sittingnexttohim.“Whathappenedtoyourresolvetohavehealthymeals?”“Guilt,”hesaidatonce.“I
hadtobreaksomenewsandthiswasmeanttopavetheway.”Sheimmediatelyfrowned.
“Whatnews?”
“Sam’sgottaworktomorrow,”Bobbyannouncedsorrowfully.“Ah,Isee,”shesaid.“And
schoolhasn’tstartedyet.”“Exactly.”Samhesitated.
“IjustspoketoShanna,butHenryiswatchingherwholegang.Ididn’twanttoaddonemore.Shesuggestedyoumighthaveanidea.”“I’msureshesuggestedI’d
behappytohavehimatmy
house,andnormallyIwould,butI’mnotgoingtobearoundtomorrow.”“That’sokay,noproblem,”
Samsaidatonce.“I’llfiguresomethingout.Worstcase,he’llcometoworkwithme.”Herexpressionturned
thoughtful.“Idohaveanalternative.CanImakeaquickcall?”“Ifyouthinkitmightlead
toasolution,gorightahead,”
hesaidatonce.“Youknow,though,thisisnotyourproblemtosolve.”“Iknow,butthiscould
workout.”Sheheldupafingerashercallconnected,thensteppedawaysotheconversationcouldn’tbeoverheard.“Done,”shesaid,smiling
whensherejoinedthem.“Pleasetellmeyoudidn’t
changeyourplansonmy
account,”Samsaid.“Notatall.Ijustchecked
tomakesureitwouldbeokayifBobbycamealong.”“Where?”Bobbyasked
suspiciously.“Firstyouhavetotellmeif
you’reanygoodatkeepingsecrets,”shesaid.“InevertoldKevinabout
thedumplings,justlikeIpromised,”hesaidsolemnly.“Excellent.”
Samregardedhercuriously.“Whatonearthareyouuptoandwhyisitasecret?”“BecauseI’mnotsurehow
myfamilywillreact,”shesaid,thenshookherhead.“No,actuallyIknowexactlyhowthey’llreactandI’mnotquitereadytotakethemon.”“Thisisgettingmore
intriguingbytheminute.DoIreallywantBobbydrawninto
thisschemeofyours?”“I’mvolunteeringataday-
careplaceoveronthehighway,”shesaid.“YouhavetoadmittakingBobbyalongisanidealsolution.”SheturnedtoBobby.“Todaywasmyfirstdayandwehadlotsandlotsoffun.Wedidfingerpaintingandplayedgamesoutside.You’llbeoneoftheolderkids,soyouevengettohelpwiththelittle
ones,likeabigbrother.Thereweresnacksandareallygoodlunch.Ithinkyou’lllikeit.Doyouwanttocomewithme?”Bobbylookedskeptical,
hisworriedgazegoingfromhertoSamandbackagain.“You’llbetherethewholetime?Youpromise?”“Absolutely.”“Iguessitwouldbemore
funthangoingtothepaper
withSam.”“It’llbetonsmorefun,”
Carrieagreed.ShemetSam’sgaze.“Howdoesitsoundtoyou?”“Ifyou’resureit’snota
problemandBobby’swilling,it’sokaywithme.Theydon’tmindthatyou’rebringinghim?”“Notforthenextcoupleof
weeks.Schoolwillstartthen,soitwon’tbeanissueany
longer,right?”“Right,”Samconfirmed.
“I’dbehappytopaytheirfee.”“Hey,they’regettingme
free.That’sanextrapairofhands.TheownerhadalreadyofferedtoletmebringJackson,mynephew,onthedaysIhavehim.And,asIsaid,Bobbywillbeabighelpwiththelittlerkids.”SamstudiedBobby’sface.
“You’reokaywiththis?Carriewillhavemyphonenumber,soyoucancallmeanytime.”“Itcouldbefuntobelikea
bigbrother,”Bobbysaid.“Daveysaysit’sreallycoolhavingJohnnyaround.”“ThenIguessit’s
decided,”Samsaid,noteventryingtohidehisrelief.“Thanks,Carrie.You’realifesaver.”
“CanIgoclimbonthejunglegym?”Bobbyasked,hismoodimproved.“Sure,”Samsaid,standing
uptofollowalongbehind,asdidCarrie.“So,tellme,”hebegan.
“Whywouldn’tyouwantyourfamilytoknowyou’redoingvolunteerworkatadaycare?”“Becausethewhole
purposeofitistogetenough
experiencetoseeifIreallywanttoopenmyown,”shesaid.“Ah,”Samsaid.“Andyou
don’tthinkthey’dapprove?”“Somewill.Somewon’t.
I’mnotsurewhichsidewillbeinthemajority.”“Andtheirapprovalisthat
importanttoyou?”“Sure.They’remyfamily,”
sherepliedsimply.“Lifeisawholeloteasierwhenthey’re
onyourside.”“I’veheardenoughabout
Micktoimaginehemustbeaforcetobereckonedwith,”Samconceded.“Stubbornandopinionated
areacoupleofwordsthatusuallycometomind.”Shemethisgaze.“Whichremindsme,Iwasprobablyremissinnotswearingyoutosecrecy,too.”Samlaughed.“Alittlelate
now,don’tyouthink?IthinkmaybeIlikehavingsomethingtoholdoveryourhead.”“You’dblackmailme?”“I’mbeginningtothinkI’d
befoolishnotto,”hesaid.“Thisincredibleopportunityjustfellintomylap.”Sheshookherheadathis
teasing.“Okay,what’sitgoingtobe?Youalreadyhavemygreat-grandmother
teachingyoutocook,thankstome,andnowI’mprovidingdaycareforBobby.That’saprettygooddeal,ifyouaskme.”“It’sanexcellentdeal,but
I’mthinkingtherecouldbeonemorething,”hesaid,notsurewhyhewasheadinginthisdirectiondespiteallofhisreservationsabouttiming,andevenaboutCarrieherself.Hejustknewhefeltbetter
whenhewasaroundher,happierandmoreincontrolofthings.“Havedinnerwithme.”Hereyeswidenedwith
shock.“You’reblackmailingmeintogoingonadatewithyou?”“I’maskingyoutogoona
date,”hecorrected.“Keepingyoursecretisjustatinyincentiveforyoutoconsidersayingyes.”
Shelaughed.“AndifIsayno?”Heshrugged.“Iguess
we’llseewhatsortofarisktakeryouare.”Evenasheutteredthe
taunt,Samwasn’tsurewhichanswerhereallywanted.He’dalwaysbeendrawntodaring,adventurouswomen.EverythingheknewaboutCarrietoldhimshefitthatdescription.Butwasthatthe
sortofwomanheneededinhislifenow?HeandBobbyneededstabilitymorethanjustaboutanything.Hehadafeelingitwouldbeimpossibletofindbothinonewoman.Then,again,hewas
alreadydiscoveringthatCarriewasprettyremarkable.
10
Micktookhiswife’soffhandcommentaboutCarrieneedingsomeoneinherlifetoheart.He’dbeensofocusedongettinghergroundedandworkingatsomethingthatwouldfulfillher,he’dforgottenaboutthe
importanceofastrongrelationshipwithsomeonesuitable.AsheandMeganstrolled
homefromthepub,hesensedMeganstudyinghimwithconcern.“What?”heasked,toget
whateverwasonhermindoutintheopen.“You’vebeenawfully
quiet,”shesaid.“Thatusuallymeansyou’reupto
something.”“I’mrightherewithyou,”
heremindedher.“WhatcouldIpossiblybeupto?”“Idon’tknowandthat
worriesme,”shereplied.“Okay,thetruthisthatI’ve
beenthinkingaboutwhatyousaidearlier,”headmitted.“AboutCarrieneedingsomeoneinherlife.”Alarmimmediatelyfilled
hereyes.“Iwasnot
suggestingthatyougooutandfindthatsomeone,MickO’Brien!Carriecandothatallonherown.She’saveryresourcefulyoungwoman.”“Isn’tshetheonewho
foundthatMarcperson,whooverworkedherandbrokeherheart?Areyousuggestingherjudgment’sbetterthanmine?”Shechuckled.“I’llgive
youthatone.Icertainlycan’t
defendMarcReynolds,butCarrielearnedfromtheexperience.She’llbemorediscerningnexttime.”“Meggie,Iloveyoufor
havingfaithinourgranddaughter,butIwasn’tblindtothefactthatshedatedeverymanwhocrossedherpathallthroughcollege.”“Andhadsenseenoughnot
tochooseonewhowaswrongforher,”Meganreminded
him.“Anoldexpressioncomestomind,somethingabouthavingtokissalotoffrogsbeforefindingaprince.”“Idon’twantourgirl
kissinganyblastedfrogs,”Mickgrumbled.“Darling,it’sametaphor.”“Whatever.Thiswillgo
betterifIgivethingsalittlepush.Now,whodoweknowwho’savailable?”
Astheyapproachedthetowngreen,henoticedthatMeganwasnolongerlisteningtohim.HefollowedthedirectionofhergazeandspottedCarriewithayoungmanand,apparently,aboywho’dclimbedtothetopofthejunglegym.Sheandthemanwerelaughingandapplaudingtheboy’sachievement.“Who’sthat?”Mick
demanded,studyingthesceneintentlyandtryingtoassessanypotentialthere.Wasthemanamarriedacquaintanceoranavailablesingledad?“I’mnot100percentsure,”
Meganequivocated.Mickfrownedather.“Who
doyouthinkitis?”heaskedwithconsiderablepatience.Sometimesitrequiredingenuityandatrainedprosecutor’sskillstogethis
wifetorevealanythingshewantedtokeeptoherself.Thisappearedtobeoneofthosetimes.“I’veheardthattheyoung
manMackhiredasawebdesigneratthepaperjusttookcustodyofhisnephew.I’mguessingthat’shim.SamWinslow,Ibelieve.”Relievedtoknowthatthe
manwasemployedbyafamilymemberandlikely
bothsingleandresponsibleenoughtobegivencustodyofachild,Mickeagerlyturnedtoheadinthatdirection.“Let’sgooverthereandsayhello,”hesuggested,onlytohavehiswifetakeafirmgriponhisarm.“Notonyourlife.They’re
obviouslyenjoyingthemselves,andthat’sthegoalyouhadinmind,right?Leavethemalone.Letnature
takeitscourse.”“Sometimesnaturetakes
toodarnlong,”Micksaid,buthedidallowhimselftobepersuadedtotakethelongwayaroundthegreenenroutehomeinordertokeepthepeacewithhiswife.Tomorrow,hevowed,he’d
doalittleinvestigatinganddetermineifthisyoungmanwastherightsortforhispreciousgranddaughter.After
all,notjustanyonewoulddo.
***
Carriefeltasifshe’dbeenfrozeninplaceforasolidtenminutes.Firstthere’dbeenSam’sunexpecteddarethatshegoonarealdatewithhim.Whileshewasstillabsorbingthatanddecidinghowtoanswer,shesawhergrandfatherandfully
expectedhimtochargerightonoverandstartinterrogatingSamabouthisintentions.GrandpaMickwasnotknownforhisdiscretion,hissubtletyorhistiming.Theonemanshe’drisked
bringinghomefromcollegehadbeenreducedtostutteringonceMickgotstarted.Despiteanimpeccablebackground,apathtoalawpartnershipinhisfather’s
veryrespectableNewYorklawfirm,poorNathanhadn’tbeenabletowithstandMick’scross-examination.Carriehadconcludedthatdidn’tbodewellforhiscareerinacourtroomorfortheirrelationship.Anymanwhocouldn’tholdhisownwithGrandpaMickwasdoomed.Surprisingly,shewasn’tquitereadytoputSamthroughthattest.
“Carrie?”Sam’squestioningtone
snappedherattentionrightbacktohim.“Sorry.Ijustsawmygrandparents.”Hegrinned.“Andwhat?It
requiredallyourconcentrationtowillthemnottocomeoverhere?”Shelaughed.“You’re
amazinglyperceptive.Seehowwellitworked?They’vealreadymovedon.”
“Whichraisesthequestionofwhyyoudidn’twantthemtomeetme,”hesaid.“OramImisinterpreting?”“Oh,no,yougotitexactly
right.Well,notaboutthemmeetingyou.Theotherwayaround.”Shesighed.“It’scomplicated.It’snotthatIdon’twantyoutomeetthemever,justnotyet.”“Because?”“Let’sjustsaythatonce
GrandpaMickgetsanideainhishead,hetendstorunwithit,andthatincludesrunningroughshodoveranyoneinhispath.Neitherofusneedsthatsortofpressure.”“Sohe’sameddler,”Sam
concluded.“Andamaster
manipulator,”sheconfirmed.“Muchtomydismay,I’mhiscurrentproject.Idon’tthinkyouneedtogettangledupin
whateverplanshedecidestopursueforme.”Amusementdancedin
Sam’seyes,buthesaidverysolemnly,“Okay,then.I’llwatchmystepifwehappentocrosspaths.”“Oh,you’llcrosspaths,”
shesaidwithregret.“Ipredicthe’llhavefiguredoutwhoyouarewithinthehourifhedoesn’tknowalready,andyou’llfindhimwaiting
onthedoorstepatthepaperfirstthingtomorrowmorning.”Samlaughed.“Thenit’sa
goodthingIdon’tgointillten.Mackcandealwithhim.”Heheldhergaze.“Now,youandIhavesomebusinesstoconclude.Wheredowestandondinner?”“Thethreeofus,you,me
andBobby?”shehedged,tryingalittlemanipulationof
herown.“Nope.Arealdate,the
wayitwasmeanttobe,justtwopeoplegettingtoknoweachother.Fridaynight.I’llmakearrangementsforBobby.”Astemptedasshewas,
CarriethoughtitwastoosoonforSamtobeabandoningBobbytosomeanonymoussitter.Itwastheperfectexcuse,sosheseizedonit.
“Sam,you’veseenthewayBobbykeepsyouinsightnomatterwhathe’sdoing.Maybeafterhe’sstartedschoolandreallysettledinhere,he’llbereadyforyoutogooutandleavehimwithasitter.Butnow?”Sheshookherhead.“Ithinkit’sabadidea.”Henoddedslowly.“So,
justtobeclear,you’resayingnobecauseofBobby,not
becauseyou’renotinterestedorbecauseyou’veconcludedI’manirresponsiblejerk?”Shedrewinadeepbreath
andexaminedhermotives,thennodded.“It’sjustaboutBobby.And,again,Ireallyamsorryaboutjumpingtoconclusionsaboutyou.You’vegivenmereasontorevisemyfirstimpression.”“Okay,then,ifwe’repast
thatparticularhurdle,how
aboutthis?OnFridaynightthethreeofuswillgooutforpizzaandtwoweeksafterthat,whenschool’sstartedandBobby’sreadytospendsometimewithafriend,youandIcangoonarealdate,justthetwoofus.”“You’reonlygivinghim
twoweekstoadjust?”shesaid,unabletokeepanoteofpanicoutofhervoice.Sherealizedthatpanichad
nothingtodowithBobbyandeverythingtodowithher.Samapparentlysawthat,
too.“Doyouneedlongertoadjusttotheideaofadatewithme?”hetaunted.“Couldbe,”sheconceded
honestly.“ButIreallyamthinkingaboutallthechangesinBobby’slife.Hisadjustmentmaynothappenonsomeprecisetimetable.Whydon’twejustagreeto
playitbyear?”“Onlyifyouagreethat
we’llseeeachotherintheinterimdoingthingsBobbycando,too.”Carriefoundhis
determinationflattering,butshewasn’tquitereadytogivein.Indaysgoneby,playinghardtogetwouldhavebeenpartofsomestrategy,butwithSam?Itwaspanic,noquestionaboutit.
“I’vealreadysaidI’dcometoaT-ballgame,”sheremindedhim.“Andwe’reallgoingtoGram’sonSaturdays,too.I’llseeyoutomorrowwhenIbringBobbyhome.”Samfrowned.“Speaking
ofthat,Iusuallywindupattheofficetillatleastnineortenatnightgettingthelatesteditionuponline.You’llhavetobringhimtotheoffice.”
“Wherehe’llbeboredtotears,hungryandpesteringyouthewholetime?”sheobjected.“Thatwillbefunforbothofyou.No.I’lltakehimtotheinn,seethathegetsdinnerandhangouttillyougetthere.Ifhegoestosleep,Jesscankeepmecompany.”“That’stoomuch,”Sam
protested.“Idon’texpectyoutomakeacareerof
babysittinghim.”“Butthat’sexactlythe
careerI’mthinkingofpursuing,”sheremindedhim.“Considerthispartofmyprofessionaltraining.”“Thenyoushouldget
paid.”“Notachance.Thisisjust
afriendlygesture.IfIdoopenadaycareandBobbyneedsaplacetocomeafterschoolatsomepoint,thenwe
cantalkaboutfeesandsuch.”Samdidn’tlookallthat
happyaboutthearrangement.“Areyousure?Idon’twanttotakeadvantageofyou.”“You’renot,”sheassured
him.“Ioffered.”Forjustaninstantshehadaflashbacktoallthetimesshe’dsaidmuchthesamethingtoMarc,jumpingintotakecareofthingsthatweren’therresponsibilityanddoingitto
pleasehim.Thedifferencenow,shetoldherself,wasthatthispleasedher.IfitbailedSamoutofajam,somuchthebetter.Afterstudyingherasifto
assesshersincerity,Samnodded.“ThenIoweyouawholelotmorethanpizza.”“Youcangivemealovely
quotethatIcanuseinmyadvertisingwhenthetimecomes,”sheteased.“Oryou
candesignmywebsiteandonlineadvertising.Ifyou’regoodenoughthatMacktrustsyouwithhispreciouspaper,that’llbegreatforme.NowI’dbettergetmoving.Ihavetobeupatfive.”Sam’sgazenarrowed.
“WhattimedoyouneedBobbytobeready?”“Five-thirty,”shesaid
brightly.“Didn’tImentionthat?You’llbeabletogeta
nice,earlystartonyourday,too.Infact,youjustmightgettothepaperintimetocrosspathswithGrandpaMick,afterall.Isn’tthatsomethingfuntolookforwardto?”Hegroaned.“Andjust
whenIwasstartingtohaveallthesewarmandfuzzythoughtsaboutyou,Idiscoverthatyouhaveaslightlytwistedstreak.”
“That’sonlywhenitcomestotheadultsinmylife.Bobby’sperfectlysafe.”Samgaveheralonglook,
hislipscurvingslightly.“Neverdoubtedthatforaminute.”
***
Aftersendingastill-sleepyBobbyoffwithCarriejustbeforedawn,Samwentdown
totheinn’skitchentobegthebiggesttake-outcupofcoffeetobehad,thenheadedtothenewspaperoffice.Thewalkthroughthequiet
streetsofChesapeakeShoreswiththesunjustbeginningtostreaktheskyintheeastoverthebaywithbrilliantsplashesofpinkandorangewassurprisinglyinvigorating.Samthoughtitmightevenbeworthgettingupatthishour
moreoften,thoughhedoubtedhe’ddoit.He’dbeenanightpersonmostofhislifeanditwasprobablyalittlelatetoadjusthisbody’sclocknow.Asearlyasitwas,hefound
Mackattheofficebeforehim.Macklookedupfromhiscomputerscreenwithshock.“Iwasn’texpectingyoufor
afewhours.”
“Iwasup.IhadtogetBobbyreadytospendthedaywithCarrie,”hesaid,censoringhimselfquicklytokeepfromspillingthebeansabouttheday-carevolunteerworkshewasdoing.“CarriegotBobbyatthe
crackofdawn?Thathastobeafirst.She’sanightowl.”Samshrugged.“Theyhave
plans.”Mackregardedhimwith
suspicion.“CarrieandBobbyhaveplans?”“WhatcanIsay?Itworked
outforme,soIdidn’taskalotofquestions.”“They’renotgettingtoo
attached,arethey?”Mackasked.Samfrowned.“Noidea
whatyoumean.”Hehelduphiscoffeecup.“IneedalotmoreofthisbeforeIstartdelvingintomotivations.
Whydon’tyoufillmeinonthelogofstoriesforthisweek’sedition?IhavesomeideasforahomepageredesignIwanttorunbyyou,somethingthatwillmakeitevenmoreuser-friendly.”Macklookedasifhe
wantedtoprotest,butinsteadheletthesubjectdrop.“BeforeIgetintothat,thereisonethingIshouldprobablyaskyou.”
“Aslongasitdoesn’tinvolvedeepthought,shoot.”“Susie’sbeenwondering
whyyouhaven’tcalledaboutlookingathouses.”“BecauseItookyour
adviceanddecidedtospendalotoftimewithBobbyhelpinghimtogetacclimated.Iknowweneedtogetoutoftheinnandintoourownplace.I’llhavemoretimetolookoncehe’sstarted
school.”Macknodded.“Shewas
justworriedmaybeyou’ddecidedtostayattheinnormaybeevenuseanotherRealtor.”“NootherRealtor.I
wouldn’tdothattoher,”Samassuredhim.“TellherI’llbeintouchassoonasschoolstarts.Ireallyamanxioustoseewhatshe’scomeupwith.”
“Willdo,”Macksaid,lookingsatisfied.Hehandedoveraprintout.“Thesearethenewsstoriesforthisweek.Youcanseetheleadrightthereontop.Therearethreefeatures,too.Acoupleofimportantmeetingsarecomingupintownafterourprintdeadline,butIwantyoutogetthecoverageofthoseuponlineassoonasthestoriesarewritten.I’lldo
thosemyself.”“Photos?”Mackturnedthecomputer
screeninhisdirection,madeafewclicksonhiskeypad,andadozenpicturescameup.“Isortedthroughalotmoreandnarroweditdowntothese.I’llusesomeintheprintedition,butthejoyoftheonlineeditionisthatyoucanuseallofthem,especiallytheshotsthatshowcasealot
oflocals.Theyeatthatup.”“Gotit,”Samsaid.
“EveryoneID’dokay?Imaynotrecognizefacesjustyet.”“Ithinkso,butanyone
you’renotcertainabout,ask.”“Okay,then.I’monit.”Hewasabouttotakehis
coffeeacrosstheroomtohisowndeskwhenthedooropenedandMickO’Brienwalkedin.So,hethought,
Carriehadnailedit.Samhadtoturnawaytohideasmile.Mackmadethe
introductions,thenlookedatMickexpectantly.“Whatbringsyoubyatthishour?Ihopeyou’reheretotakeoutabigfull-pagead.”Micklaughed.“Forwhat?
Haven’tyouheard?I’mretired.”“That’snotwhatIhear
fromtheguyswhoworkfor
yourcompany,”Mackresponded.“Hasmynephewbeen
grumblingagainaboutbeingoverworked?”Mickaskedwithoutrancor.“Matthewdoesn’tknowhoweasyI’vebeenonhim,onallofthem,nowthatI’vemellowedout.”“So,ifyou’renothereto
advertisesomething,whatdoesbringyouby?”Mackasked.
“IwashopingtocatchSamifhehasacoupleofminutes,”Micksaid.Clearlysurprised,Mack
lookedfromMicktoSam,thenchuckled.“Surething.”Samheadedforhisdesk,
thengesturedtowardthechairbesideit.“Haveaseat.Idon’thavealotoftime.We’reondeadlinetoday.”“Thiswon’ttakelong,”
Micksaid,sittingdownand
takinghistimestudyingSam.“YouknowmygranddaughterCarrie?”“Ido,”hesaidsolemnly.“Wonderfulgirl,”Mick
said.“Idon’tknowherwell,but
I’msuresheis.”“Isawthetwoofyou
togetherlastnight.Theboywithyou,that’syournephew?”“Bobby,yes.Ijustgained
fullcustodyofhimafterhisparentsdied.”Seeminglygenuinedismay
registeredonMick’sface.“Terriblethingtolosebothparentslikethat.He’sluckytohaveyou.”“Iguesswe’llseeabout
that,”Samsaid.“ButI’mgoingtotrymybest.”“Can’taskmorethanthat.”“Sir,ifthere’snothingelse
onyourmind,Ireallydo
needtogettowork.Bobby’swithCarrierightnow,andIneedtogetmyjobdone,soIcantakeoveragain.”Sowhatifthetimelineforthatwasn’tastightashewasimplying.Micknodded.“I
understandallaboutworktakingpriority,butapieceofadvicefromamanwhogothisownprioritiesalloutofwhack.Family’swhatcounts.”
“I’lltakethattoheart,”Sampromised.Mickheldhisgazefora
longtime,thengavealittlenodthatSamcouldn’tinterpret.Hehadn’tknownMicklongenoughtoconcludeiftheinterviewhadgonewellorifhe’dfailedmiserably.Hesupposedtimewouldtell.TimewouldalsotellifMickO’Brien’sapprovalwasnecessaryif
SamwastohaveanyhopeofgettinganyclosertoCarrie.Rightnowthatmightnotmatter,buthehadahunchthingswereheadinginthatdirectionalittlefasterthanhe’doriginallyanticipated.
***
Attheday-carecenterBobbyhadshadowedCarrie’severymoveuntilLucyfinally
intercededandmanagedtogethimtoplayagamewithseveralotherchildren.AliciadrewCarrieaside.“That’stheboyyouwere
soconcernedaboutlastweek?”sheaskedwithanodinBobby’sdirection.“Yes,”Carrieconfirmed.“Andnowhe’sattached
himselftoyou?”“I’mtheonlypersonhe
knowshere.Samwasina
bindtodayandJuliesaidIcouldbringBobbywithmewhenI’mhere,atleastuntilhestartsschool.”ShefrownedatthelookofconcernonAlicia’sface.“Istheresomethingwrong?”“Yousaidhe’dlostboth
parents.ObviouslySamisfillinginforhisdadthesedays,butwhataboutyou?Areyoureadytotaketheplaceofhismom?”
“No,ofcoursenot.I’mafriend.Barelyeventhat.”“Bobbydoesn’tseemto
feelthatway.He’slookingforreplacements,Carrie.Unlessyou’rereadytostepintothatrole,becarefulhowyouhandlethings.WebothknowI’mnotanexpert,butIcanseehowattachedheisalready.”“He’sawonderfullittle
boy,”Carriesaid.“I’mjust
tryingtohelpoutinatoughsituation.”“Bestintentionsinthe
world,”Aliciaagreed.“Butasix-year-old...”Shehesitated.“Isthatright?He’ssix?”Carrienodded.“He’sgoingtogravitate
towardthefirstpersonwhocanfillthathugevoidthat’sbeenleftinhislife.”“Idon’tknowhowto
handlethisanyotherway,”
Carriereplied,frustrated.“Heneedstoknowtherearepeoplewhocareabouthim.”“Thenmakesurethereare
lotsofthem,”Aliciaadvised.“Notjustyou.”Carriecouldseeherpoint,
whichmeantthatthesoonerthereweremorelovingadultssurroundingBobbyandherroleinhislifewasminimized,thebetter.Italsomeantthoseplansshe’dmade
thenightbeforewithSamshouldprobablybeputonholdfornow.Creatinganongoingthreesomemightsuggestsomethingcompletelyunintendedtoalittleboylookingdesperatelyforafamily.Shetriedtellingherselfthe
disappointmentthatwashedoverherwasallaboutnotspendingmoretimearoundabright,inquisitivelittleboy,
butitwastheimageofhisgrown-upunclethatshecouldn’tseemtogetoutofherhead.
***
SamhadleftwordwithJessthatshecouldletCarrieintohissuitewhenshearrivedwithBobby.NotthatCarriecouldn’thavepersuadedheraunttoletherin,butwhy
shouldshebebotheredwiththehassle?He’dhopedtobeableto
jointhemintimefordinner,giventheearlystarthe’dgotteninthemorning,butonecrisisafteranotherwiththeirinternetserverhadmadethatimpossible.Ateight,hecalledCarrie’scellphone.“I’msosorry.IthoughtI’d
betherebynowtohavedessertwithyouoratleastto
takeover,butweseemtobeinaholdingpatternhere.”“Notaproblem,”Carrie
assuredhim.“Bobby’shaddinner,takenhisbathandiswatchingavideo.What’shisbedtime?”“Iaimfornine,butwe
sometimesgetdistracted,”Samsaid,thinkingofhowoftenthathadactuallyhappened.Ninehadbeenaprettyunrealisticgoal
apparently.Shelaughed.“I’llmake
surewe’renotdistracted.Heshouldbeinthatroutinebythetimeschoolstarts,anyway.”“You’reright,”Samsaid.
“TellhimI’lltrytobethereintimetoreadhimastory.”“He’salreadypickedout
tonight’sbook—orfivebasedonthepileheshowedme.I’llfillin,ifneedbe,thoughIbet
youdobettervoicesthanIcan.”“He’snotanespecially
toughcritic,”Samsaid.“ButIwilltrytomakeit.Seeyouinanhour.”Heactuallycamecloseto
makingit,too.Itwas9:45whenhewalkedintothesuitecarryingapizzaandabottleofwine.HeregardedCarrieapologetically.“He’salreadyasleep?”
“Outlikealight.Hehadabigdayattheday-carecenter.HewasyawningbythetimeIgotoffthephonewithyouandasleeptwopagesintohisfirststory.”“Idon’tknowhowtothank
you.Thiswaswayaboveandbeyond.”“Nothanksnecessary.We
hadfun,”sherepliedsimply.“Hereallyisagreatkid.”“Well,Iwon’tstart
dependingonyoutofillin,”hepromised.“Sam,it’snotabigdeal.If
IhaveJackson,hecanhangoutwithus.OnthedaysI’matthecenter,IalreadyhaveJulie’spermissiontobringhimalong.Hewasgreatwiththeotherkidstoday.Everybodylovedhim.”“Okay,then.WhenI’min
abind,I’llcheckwithyou,”Samsaid.“Now,then,are
youhungry?Canyoustayforawhileandsharethepizzaandwine?”Shehesitatedfora
surprisinglylongtime.“Carrie?What’sgoingon?
It’spizzaandwine,notalifetimecommitment.”“It’ssomethingsomeoneat
thecentersaidtoday,”shetoldhim.“TheythoughtBobbymightbegettingtooattachedtome.Wealready
knowyou’rehislifeline.Ican’tbeone,too.YouandI...well,wehardlyevenknoweachother.Bobby’semotionsareprettyprecariousrightnow.Wedon’twanthimtogetanyideasabouthowI’mgoingtofitintohisnewworld.”Samsetdownthepizza
andwineandcrossedtheroom.Herestedhishandsonhershouldersandlookedinto
hertroubledeyes.“Thefactthatyoucaresodarnedmuchisproofofhowspecialyouare.It’sthereasonI’dliketogettoknowyoubetter.”“HowamIsupposedto
trustthat?”sheasked.“You’reinadifficultsituation.I’mableandwillingtohelpout.Don’tyouseehowtangledupthatcouldget?AddinthepossibilitythatBobbycouldgethurtand
it’stoobigarisk.”Sam’sheartsank.“So,
you’renotonlysayingnotopizzaandwinetonight,butnextweekandbeyond,isthatright?”Shenodded.“Ithinkthat’s
forthebest.I’llstillcometohisT-ballgameonSaturdayandI’llbeatGram’sforourcookinglesson,butyoushouldprobablymakesurehegetstoknowlotsofother
peoplerightnow,sohedoesn’tgetoverlyattachedtomeoranyoneelse.”“You’vereallythought
aboutthis,haven’tyou?”“Eversinceitwasbrought
tomyattentionthatthesituationmightnotbehealthy.”“ForBobby?”hesaid,
wonderingyetagainifhisnephewwastheonlyoneshedidn’twanttoriskgetting
hurt.“Ofcourse.”Samdidn’tconsider
himselftobeallthatintuitivewhenitcametowomen,butthissituationwasplainasdayeventohim.“Somebodydidarealnumberonyou,didn’tthey?”Sheimmediatelylookedso
flustered,Samknewhe’dgottenitexactlyright.“Whathappened,Carrie?”
“Itdoesn’tmatter.”“Ithinkitdoes.It’snotthat
Idon’tbelieveyou’reconcernedforBobby.Iknowyouare.Butyou’vebeentakenadvantageofbysomeoneandthissituationisbringingupbadmemories.”“Maybe,”shefinally
admitted.“Inaway.Butthesituationsarenothingalike,honestly.Andbelieveme,youarenothinglikeMarc
Reynolds.”Samregardedherwith
shock.Hedidn’tknowalotaboutfashion,butheknewthatname.Themanhadarichtabloidhistorywithseveralofhistopmodels.“Hewasyourlastrelationship?”Sheshrugged.“Ifyou
couldcallitthat.Look,it’smessyandit’snotoneofmyfinermoments.Canweleave
itatthat?”Discussingitobviously
broughtbackpainfulmemories.Samquicklyrealizedthismightnotbethetimetoprobefordetails.“Sure,”hesaid.“I’msorry,Carrie.Imaynotknowwhathappened,butI’dbewillingtolayoddsyoudidn’tdeserveit.”Shesmiledathis
vehemence.“Thanksforthat.
I’dbettergo.”“You’reherenow,”he
protested.“Bobby’sasleep.Ihateeatingalone.Stickaroundforoneglassofwineandkeepmecompany.Canyoudothat?”Foramomentshelooked
torn,butthenhergazewasdrawntothepizzabox.“Whatkind?”“Veggie,”hesaid.Asmilebrokeacrossher
face.“Youwin!”shesaid,throwingopentheboxandtakingaslice,thencurlingintoacornerofthesofa.Samgrinned.“Make
yourselfathome,whydon’tyou?”“WhatcanIsay?Imade
Bobbyeatahealthydinnerdownstairs,butitwasprettydarnboring.This,however,isthefoodofthegods.Pizzalikethismayormaynotbe
trulyItalian,butI’mgivingthemcreditformakingthefoodworldabetterplace.”Samlaughed,satbeside
herandpouredthewine,thentookhisownslice.“Amentothat!Askanyunattachedmaleovereighteenwholivesonhisownandit’sprobablypizzathatkeepsusalive.”Carrieheldouther
wineglassandtappedittohis.Sammethergazeandheldit.
Awickedcurrentofelectricitysparkedbetweenthem.Nomatterwhatshe’dsaidearlier,nomatterhowwiseherdecision,thisthingbetweenthemwasn’tover.Itwasjusttemporarilyonhold.
11
CarriewasshakenbyhowintensethingshadgottenwithSamthenightbefore.Thatonelong,sizzlinglookevenaftershe’ddeclaredwhatabadideaitwasforthemtospendtimetogetherhadtoldherthatshewascrazyifshe
thoughtabunchofwordsandgoodintentionsweregoingtokeepthemapart.Shehadtotry,though.ForBobby’ssakeand,asSamhadguessed,herown.She’dmadeonetrulyterriblejudgmentaboutamanandithadtornheremotionallifeapart.Shewasn’tquitereadytotrustherselfagain.Anditwasn’tasifSam
hadn’tgivenhercauseforconcern.Lookhowbadly
he’dbungledthingswithBobbywhenthey’dfirstmet.Sure,therewereextenuatingcircumstancesandheseemedtohavelearnedfromthosemistakes,butoneofthethingsshewantedmostdesperatelywasamanwho’dbeagreatdad.Herssurehadn’tfitthebill.
WesWintershadbeencontrollingandhaddemonstratedthemoralsof
analleycatwhenhe’dgotteninvolvedwithoneofhermom’scoworkers.SincethedivorceandtheirmovetoChesapeakeShores,he’dbeenmostlyanabsenteefather,rarelyputtinginanappearanceevenonbigoccasionssuchasCait’swedding.He’dsentanextravagantgiftandalameexcuseforhisabsence.Herstepfather,though,was
somethingelse.Tracehadbeenaloving,warm,thoughtfulpresenceinherlifeandCait’sfromtheminutehe’dstartedtryingtowinbackhermom.He’dbeentough,butfair,alotlikeGrandpaMick,butwithoutthemeddlinggene.OnWednesdaymorning
withallthosethoughtsstilltumblingaroundinherhead,CarriewasatSally’sfor
coffeeintimetocatchupwithShanna,BreeandHeather.She’darrangedtodotheday-carecenteragainonThursday,buthadkepttodayandFridayopentobabysitJacksonasusual.EventhoughtheoffertobringhimalonghadbeenmadebyJulie,CarriethoughttheearlyhourwouldbetoohardonthebabyandonNoah,whohadpreciouslittletimewithhis
sonasitwas.Theirearly-morningritual,evenwhenitincludedgobsofsmearedcereal,mattered.“Wherehaveyoubeenthe
pastcoupleofmornings?”Breeasked.“Iwasbusy,”Carriesaid
evasively.“Notjustsleepinginafter
latenightswithyou-know-who?”Shannataunted.Bree’seyeslitup.“Ifthat
werethecase,thenthismorningwouldn’thavebeenanexception,”shesaid,clearlydelightedthatShannahadbrokentheiceandopenedupthisparticulartopic.“Ihaveitongoodauthority,shewasattheinntillallhourslastnight.”Carriebarelycontaineda
groan.“NotthatI’msurprised,sinceAuntJesshasneverbeenonetokeepa
tidbitofgossiptoherself,butdidshealsohappentomentionIwastherebabysittingBobbywhileSamwasondeadlineatthepaper?”“Tillaftermidnight?”her
auntBreeretortedwithundisguisedskepticism.“JakewaspickingupapizzaforalatesnackafterhefinishedabiglandscapingjobandhehappenedtorunintoSamat
thepizzaplace.So,IknowSamgotbacktotheinnbeforeten.Yourcarwasinthelottillmuch,muchlater.”Thisfinalrevelationwasmadewithacertaindegreeoftriumphinhervoice.Carriesighed.“Ireally
needtoreevaluatewhetherIcanstandtoliveinChesapeakeShores.”Thoughthecommenthad
comeoutimpulsively,she
couldn’thavechosenherthreatmorecarefully.Allthreewomenimmediatelylookedalarmed.“We’llcutitout—I
promise,”Shannasaidatonce.“Absolutely,”Breechimed
in.“Idon’twantmysisteronmycaseforchasingoffherdaughter.Abby’supsetenoughthatCaitlyn’sstilllivinginBaltimore,even
thoughNoahandtheirbabyarehere.”“Thenletthatbealesson
toyou,”Carriescolded,totakeadvantageoftheirmomentarychagrin.“Myrootsherearenotfirmlyplantedinthegroundquiteyet.”“Youboughtahouse,”
Heathersaidtentatively.“Youwanttostay.Youknowyoudo.”
“Ahousedoesn’tmakealife,”Carrieremindedthem.“AllO’Brienseventuallywanttohaveahomeheretocomebackto,evenforshortvisits.Itwasasmartinvestment.”“Andanindicationofhow
you’releaning.Alltheotherpieceswillfallintoplace,”Breesaidwithcertainty.“Ididn’tknowIwantedtostaywhenIfirstmovedbackfrom
ChicagoafterthatdisastrousexperienceIhadattheregionaltheater.ButthenIopenedFlowersonMain,JakeandIgotbacktogetherandIopenedthetheater.Thisiswhatmylifewasmeanttobe.”“Itworkedalotlikethat
forallofus.LivinginChesapeakeShoreswasthefirststepintoourfutures,”Shannasaid,thenaddedwith
confidence,“That’swhatitisforyou,too,Carrie.”“Andnowwe’reofficially
droppingthesubject,”Breesaid.Theothertwonodded,
thoughHeathergaveCarrieahopefullook.“Unlessthere’ssomethingyouwantedtotellusaboutyouandSam.”“Incorrigible!”Carrie
decreed,laughing.“Allofyou.”
“Onlybecauseweloveyouandwantyoutobehappy,”Shannainsisted.“We’renotjustnosy,honestly.”“Andnowyousoundlike
GrandpaMick,”Carriesaidwithanexaggeratedshudder.Thethreewomen
exchangedlooks,thenshudderedthemselves.“That’sit.Message
received,”Breedeclared.“Let’smoveontoSusie.
Haveanyofyouseenher?”“Notsincetheadoption
fiasco,”Heathersaid.“Iknowshe’sworkingagain,butshe’sobviouslyavoidingus.”“I’vecalled,”Shannasaid.
“IevenpokedmyheadintheofficeonMonday,butshepickedupthephoneandwavedmeoff.”“Notunusual,”Breesaid.
“She’sprettyfocusedwhenit
comestowork.”“Ah,butthat’sthething,”
Shannasaid.“Thephonehadn’trung.”“Oh,dear,”Carriesaid.
“She’sshuttingeveryoneout.Thatcan’tbegood.”“Ihaveonethought,”
Shannasaid.“We’redueforabook-clubmeetingandit’sherturntohostit.Icanremindherofthatandseehowshefeelsaboutit.Maybe
ifIapproachherandtheconversation’snotaboutherandhowshe’sfeeling,she’llrelaxandletusbackin.”“It’sworthashot,”Bree
said.“Somebodyneedstodosomething.GramwasbesideherselfwhenSusieandMackskippedSundaydinneragainthisweek.Idon’tlikeseeingherupset.”“Me,either,”Shannasaid.
“ThoughI’veneverknown
Nelltositonthesidelinesforlong.She’llbeonSusie’sdoorstepanydaynow,ifshehasn’tbeenalready.”“Nodoubtaboutit,”Carrie
said.“I’lltrytogetGramtoholdoffanotherweek,ifyou’llseeifyoucangetthisbook-clubmeetingorganized.”“Done,”theothersagreed,
practicallyinunison.“Okay,then,ifwe’reallin
agreement,I’dbetterheadtotheflowershop,”Breesaid.“Jake’sbringingmyorderinearly.”Shegrinnedwickedly.“IfI’mlucky,wecanmakeoutinthebackroomforacoupleofminutes.”Heatherlaughed.“Wemay
betheluckiestwomenintheworld.”“Howso?”Carrieasked,
curiousbecauseitdidseemtoherthattheywere.She
couldn’thelpwonderingwhattheirsecretwas.“We’reallmarriedtomen
westillthinkarehot,”Heatherreplied.“Betteryet,theycan’tkeeptheirhandsoffus,either.”Carrieslappedherhands
overherears.“Toomuchinformation!”sheprotestedeventhoughshewastheonewho’daskedfortheinsight.“Notso,”Breesaid.
“We’resettingagoodexampleforyou.Whenyoufindtheguywhomakesyoufeellikethatyou’llknowhe’stherightone.”AnimageofSamandthat
sizzlingmomentthey’dsharedthenightbeforeimmediatelycametomind.Shecouldsayitwasabadideafromnowtilldoomsday,butshewashavingmoreandmoretroublebelievingit.
***
MackstoppedbytherealestatemanagementofficetotrytolureSusietolunchandfoundherwithShanna.“Comeon,Susie.
Tomorrow’sbook-clubnightandit’syourturn.Pleasedon’tbackout.We’vebeenmissingyoulikecrazyatSally’sinthemorning.Wewanttocatchup.”
Susieopenedhermouth,abouttodeclineagainifMackknewanythingatallabouthiswife,butShannakeptrightontalkingoverher.“Youwon’thavetodoathing,”shepromised.“We’llbringthefood,thedrinks,allofit.We’llevencleanup.”“Soundslikeagreatdeal,”
Macksaid,watchinghiswifeclosely.Susiebarelysparedhima
glancebeforeshakingherhead.“I’mnotreadyforagirls’night.AndIhaven’tevenreadthebook.”Shannagrinned.“When
hasthatevermatteredtoanyoneexceptme?HalfthetimeI’mtheonlyonewho’sreadit.YouknowthisisjustanexcuseforalltheO’Brienwomentogettogether.”Mackkeptsilent,praying
thatSusiewouldbreakdown
andsayyes.Sheneededherfriends,whethershewantedtoadmititornot.“Okay,”shesaidatlast.
“ButnotonewordaboutwhathappenedtoMackandme,okay?Ican’ttalkaboutnotgettingthebaby.”“Promise,”Shannasaid.
“I’dbettergetbacktothestore.I’mtraininganewsalesclerkandshepanicsifwehavemorethanone
customeratatime.Seeyoutomorrowatseven.Don’tliftafinger.We’lldoeverything.”Susienodded,thoughshe
stilldidn’tlookespeciallyhappyaboutagreeingtoit.WhenShannahadgone,
Macktookherplacebesidehiswife’sdesk.“Thatshouldbefun.Youneedtospendsometimewiththegirls.”Shegavehimawrylook.
“Soyou’refreetoplayhoopswiththeguys?Don’tthinkIhaven’tnoticedhowcloselyyou’vebeenstickingtohome.”“It’snotasifspending
timewithmywifeisahugesacrifice,”heresponded.“Infact,Icamebynowtoseeifyouhavetimeforlunch.”“AtSally’s?”sheasked,a
frowninplace.“Unlessyou’dprefer
someplaceelse.”“Anyplaceelse,”shesaid
fervently.“PaniniBistro,thepizza
place,Brady’s?Yourchoice.”“Home,”shesaidatonce.
“Icanmakesaladsthere.”“Areyousureyou
wouldn’trathergoout?”“Verysure.”“Becauseyoudon’twant
torunintoanyonewhomightaskabouttheadoption?”he
guessed.Shenodded.“I’dtold
everybodyitwashappening,Mack.Iwassoexcited.NowIjustdon’tknowwhattosay.Ithurtsseeingthepityintheireyes.”Hereachedforherhand.
“I’msosorry,babe.”“It’llgetbettereventually,”
shesaidwithmorehopethanconfidenceinhervoice.“Peoplewillhearwhat
happened,iftheyhaven’talready,andwillavoidthetopic.”“Theywill,youknow.If
theydon’tdropit,iftheydoask,it’sonlybecauseeveryoneinthistownadoresyou.”“Isuppose.”“BeforeIforget,Samtold
melastnightthathe’llbeintouchaboutlookingathousesassoonasschoolstartsand
hehasmoretime.He’sbeenspendingmostofhissparetimewithBobby.”Herexpressionbrightened
marginally.“They’redoingokay?”“Itsoundslikeit.Iknow
Carrie’sbeenhelpingout,”hesaid,thencouldhavekickedhimselfwhendismayonceagainwashedoverSusie’sface.“Let’sgohavelunch.Ithinkit’scoolenoughtosit
ontheporch.”Shenodded,butitwas
clearsomeofthelifehadgoneoutofheragain.Whenshestoodup,Mackdrewherintohisarmsandpressedakisstoherforehead.“Iloveyoumorethan
anything,”hetoldher.“AndIhatethatyou’rehurting.”“I’mtryingtogetpastwhat
happened,Mack.Ireallyam.”
Mackbelievedher,buttheybothknewthatpainthatdeepsimplydidn’tvanishovernight.
***
Withthemorningoffafterworkinglatethenightbefore,SamboughtBobbyafishingpoleatEthel’sEmporium,thentookhimtothetownpiertoseewhattheycould
catch.Bobbyeyedthewormswithdistaste.“They’reyucky!”he
declared.Samlaughed.“I’llgrant
youthat,butthefishlovethem.”Heglancedupwithrelief
whenheheardHenry,DaveyandJohnnyapproaching.Shannahadcalledthatmorningandofferedtosendthemalongtohelpwitha
fishinglesson.“Everyboyinthistown
needstolearntofish,”she’ddeclared.“It’sariteofpassage.ItaughtHenrymyself.Ofcourse,Kevincamealongandimprovedonmylessons.Hedidn’tthinkawoman,especiallyonewhomovedherefromabigcity,couldpossiblyknowanythingaboutdoingitright.”“How’dyoufeelabout
that?”Samasked,curious.“Oh,hewasright,no
questionaboutit,”Shannaadmitted.“ButtheimportantthingwasHenrygaveitatryandcametoloveit.”Henrytookoverwiththe
youngerboysandSamsettledontoabenchtoenjoythemorning.NotonlydidHenryknowwhathewasdoing,itseemedhehadendlesspatiencewiththekids.
Davey,ofcourse,needednocoaching.Hecaughthisfirstfishbeforetheothersevenhadthebaitontheirlines.“Nowwethrowhimback,”
Daveysaid.“Butwhy?”Bobbyasked,
clearlyfascinatedwiththefishinDavey’shand.“Becausehe’stoolittleto
eat,”Daveytoldhimsolemnly.“Heshouldhaveachancetogrowup.”
WhilecatchandreleasewasobviouslyalessoningrainedbyKevin,itdidn’tseemtoresonatewellwithBobby.TearsfilledhiseyesandhecamerunningforSam.“What’swrong?”Sam
asked,atalosstounderstandtheobviouslyheartfeltemotion.“Whatifhecan’tfindhis
mommyanddaddyagain?”hewhisperedtoSam.
“I’llbetthey’reclosebywaitingforhim,”Samsaid.“That’swhatmomsand
dadsdo,”Daveysaidinhisownattempttobereassuring.ThatonlymadeBobbycry
harder.“Notmine,”hesaidbetweensobs.AllSamcoulddowashold
himclosewhilethetearsflowed.“I’msorry,”Daveysaid,
lookingshaken.“Iforgot
abouthismomanddad.”“It’sokay,”Samassured
him.“Sometimesitjusthitshim.Maybeweshouldallgoforsomeicecreamandforgetaboutfishingthismorning.”“Soundsgoodtome,”
Henrysaidatonce,takinghiscuefromSam.“Theseguysarealwaysupforicecream,right,Davey?”“Right,”Daveysaidat
once.
“Bobby?Johnny?Doesthatsoundokaytoyou?”Samprodded.Johnnykepthissolemn
gazetrainedonBobby,asifheunderstoodthatBobbywasthekeytowhethericecreamwasanoption.“Iguess,”Bobbysaidwith
aloudsniff.“CanIhavechocolate?”“Youcanhaveanyflavor
youwant,”Samsaid,
relieved.“MaybeCarriecould
come?”Bobbysuggested.Samthoughtofher
declarationthattheydonothingthatwouldfeedintoBobby’sgrowingattachmenttoher.“Ithinkshe’soutoftowntoday,pal.Remember?”Bobbylookedpuzzled,but
thenhisexpressionbrightened.“Oh,yeah,theday-careplace.”
EvenastheinnocentwordsleftBobby’smouth,Samwinced.“Day-careplace?”Henry
echoed,lookingconfused.“What’sthat?”EvenBobbyrealizedhis
mistake.HestaredsheepishlyatSam.“Uh-oh,”hewhispered.“Isshegonnabemadatme?”“Noway,”Samsoothed,
thoughheknewnosuch
thing.Fornow,though,hehadtododamagecontrol.HeofferedabrightsmileforHenry.“Justaprojectshe’sbeenworkingon.Shedoesn’twantanyonetoknowaboutityet.”Henrystudiedhimwith
thatsolemn,knowingexpressionthatsuggestedhewaswisebeyondhisyears.“Gotit,”hesaidreadily.“Noonewillhearaboutitfrom
me.”HescowledfiercelyatDavey.“Gotthat?”“Mylipsarezipped,”
Daveyconfirmed.Henrygaveanodof
satisfaction.“We’regood,then.”“Okay.Let’sgetthatice
cream,”Samsaideagerly.Assoonasthekidswere
settledonabenchfacingthebaywiththeircones,hesteppedaside,pulledouthis
cellandcalledCarrie.Sinceshewasworking,he’danticipatedvoicemail,butshepickedupatonce.“IhopeI’mnotdisturbing
youatwork,”hesaid.“ActuallyI’mathome.I
haveJacksontoday.Iwon’tbegoingtothedaycareagainuntiltomorrow.What’sup?”“JustsomethingIthought
youneededtoknow.”“IsitaboutBobby?Ishe
okay?”“Hehadalittlemeltdown
earlier,”hesaid,explainingwhathadhappened.“Hewantedmetocallyou.Iremindedhimyouwereworkingtoday—oratleastIthoughtyouwere—andhekindofblurtedoutsomethingabouttheday-carecenter.”“AndHenryandDavey
caughtit?”“Oh,yeah,thoughthey
havepromisedtokeepwhattheyheardtothemselves.Ijustthoughtyoushouldknowthatyoursecret’snotsosecretanymore.”Shesighedheavily.“I
shouldhaveknownitwouldn’tlast.IguessI’llhavetocomecleanaboutthissooner,ratherthanlater.It’snotasifIdon’tknowalreadythatthisissomethingIwanttopursue.IthinkI’mreadyto
dobattlewithanyoneinthefamilywhotellsmeI’mcrazyornotthinkingrationallyorwhatever.”“Ican’tsayifthisisthe
rightcareerpathforyouornot,butIdoknowhowgreatyouarewithkids,”Samsaid.“Ifthisissomethingthatyoubelievewillfulfillyou,thenIsaygoforit.”“Couldyouputthatin
writing?MaybeifIhavea
fewtestimonials,mygrandfatherandmyparentswon’tgoberserk.”“Happytodothat,”Sam
said.“Wanttohaveastrategysessionlater?”“Sam,”sheprotested.“AfterBobby’sinbed,”he
persisted.“Thesuite’sbig.Wedidn’twakehimuptheothernight.I’mverygoodatmakingpro-conlists.”Shelaughed.“Youhaven’t
metmytwin.Sheisthegrandmasterofthepro-conlist.”“I’llbetIcouldgivehera
runforhermoney.”HethoughtofhowfrequentlyLaurelhadforcedhimtositdownandevaluatedecisionsrationally,whenhe’dwantedtojumpintosomethingimpulsively.He’dhatedherforitatthetime,buttheskillhadstayedwithhim.Shehesitatedforsolong,
hethoughthe’dlost,buteventuallyshesaid,“Okay.Honestly,Icouldusethehelptoweedouttheemotionalargumentsfromthesound,rationalones.”“ThenI’llmakesure
Bobby’sinbedbynineandasleep.I’llaskJesstosendupsomebrainfoodforsnacks.”Shelaughed.“Whaton
earthwouldthatbe?”“Youknow...healthystuff.
Almonds.Carrotsticks.Whatever.”“MaybeIshouldbringthe
snacks,”Carriereplied.“AndthelessJessknowsaboutthislittleget-togetherthebetter.Thewholeblastedfamilyapparentlyknewaboutmebeingovertherelastnight.”“Youcouldswearherto
secrecy,”Samsuggested.“It’sdivulgingsecretsto
thewrongpeoplethatgotme
intothis,”sheretorted.“I’mnottellingmyauntathing.”Helaughed.“Iseeyour
point.”“Sam,thanks.”“Forwhat?Lettingmy
nephewblabyoursecret?”“Forscramblingtomakeit
right,”shecorrected.“Andforofferingtohelpmesortthisout.”“Notaproblem.Seeyou
tonight.”
HehungupandglancedoveratBobby,whowasnowcoveredwithchocolateicecreamandgigglinghappilyagain.Hewasstartingtoseethatthedifficultmomentsinparentingweresomehowbalancedoutquitenicelywithmomentsjustlikethis.Hehadn’tfeltthisoptimisticinweeks.
***
EventhoughapartofCarrieverymuchregrettedbeingpushedtorevealherplansmuchsoonerthanshe’dhopedto,shecouldn’thelpfeelingafaintsenseofreliefthatsooneveryonewouldknowandshecouldstartmovingonwithherlife.ShearrivedatSam’switha
grocerybagfilledwithherideaofappropriatesnackfood—chips,guacamoleand
apintofBen&Jerry’sicecream.Thecombinationwasprettysickeningwhenshereallythoughtaboutit,butit’swhathadappealedtoherwhensheshopped.“Bobbyasleep?”she
asked,hervoicelowwhenSamansweredthedoortohissuite.“Inbedbyeight-thirtyand
asleepafewsentencesintohissecondbook,”Sam
assuredher,thenpeekedintothebag.Onebrowshotupwhenhegotagoodlookatthecontents.“Seriously?SpicyguacamoleandChunkyMonkey?”“Itseemedlikeagoodidea
atthetime,”shetoldhimblithely.“Well,onething’sforsure,
itoughttokeepuswide-awakeallnight.”“Maybeweshoulddivide
itup,”shesuggested,rethinkingthewholething.“Dibsontheicecream.”“Thechipsworkforme,”
Samsaidagreeably.Carriepulledhertabletout
ofherpurseandcurledintothesamecornerofthesofawhereshe’dsatonherpreviousvisit.She’dhavetocomplimentJessonherfurniturechoicesoneofthesedays.Thiswasmuchmore
comfortablethanhersofaathome.“Okay,Mr.Organization,
wheredowestart?”“Pros,”hesaidatonce.
“Let’sbepositive.”“Okay,then,”shesaidand
typedthatshelovedspendingtimewithkidsatthetopofthelist.“AndI’mgoodwiththem,too,”sheadded.“Putthatdown,too.What
else?”
“I’vebeengettingpracticalexperience,”shesaid.“Maybeit’sonlyafewdayssofar,butit’sbeenthebestthingI’vedoneinalongtime.I’mtrulyhappyattheendoftheday.JuliealreadyagreesIhaveaknackforworkingwithkids,andshe’sbeenatitforyears.”“Howareyouwhenthings
don’tgososmoothly?”“Idon’tgetflusteredor
impatient,ifthat’swhatyou’reasking.I’mcalminacrisis.”“Anotherplus,”hesaid.“AndI’mgreatwithall
ages.IlovebeingwithJackson,butIthinkI’mprettygoodwiththeolderkids,too.”Samnodded.“Allvalid
reasonswhythiswouldbeagoodfitforyou.Anybusinessreasonsit’sagood
choice?”“That’seasy.Thetown
needsagooddaycare.There’ssomehelpavailableatoneofthechurches,butit’srunbyvolunteersandtheycan’thandleallthechildrenwhoneedaplacetogo.Jackson’sthereacoupleofdaysaweek,butthat’salltheycouldaccommodate.That’sonereasonI’vebeenpitchingin.Noah’sactually
luckytheywouldtakehimatall.Alotofplacesdon’ttakebabies.”Samwassmiling.“Youare
sointothis.Howcouldyourfamilydoubtforasecondthatit’sexactlyrightforyou?”“Experience?”she
suggestedwithashrug.“ThewholefashionthingwassomethingIwaspassionateaboutforaboutaminute.BeforethatIworkedwitha
sportsteam,alsoforaboutaminute.”Shemadeaface.“Andthebigdrawwithbothofthosejobs?Iwasattractedtoaman.”Helaughed.“Well,that’s
obviouslynotthecasewiththis.Anditwillbeyourbusiness,notsomeoneelse’s.”“Theymighthavebought
thatacoupleofweeksago,”shesaid.
“Whywouldn’ttheybuyitnow?”“You,”shesaidcandidly.
“YouneedhelpwithBobbyandtheyknowwhatasuckerIcanbeforamanwhoneedsme.”Suddenunderstanding
dawnedonSam’sface.“That’swhyyouwerecomparingoursituationtoyourrelationshipwiththefashionjerk,isn’tit?”
“Afraidso.”“Butdidn’tyoutellmethat
Lukehadproposedthisideatoyouevenbeforememet?”“Aboutfifteenminutes
before,tobeexact.Soyouseewhypeoplemightbeskeptical.Thetimingissuspicious.”“Doyouthinkthishas
anythingtodowithme?”heasked.Shehesitated,thenshook
herhead.“Runningintoyouthatnightmighthavestirredupallmymaternalfeelings,butthedaycare?AfterworkingwithJuliethisweek,Iknowit’saboutdoingsomethingthatwillmakemehappy,somethingI’llbegoodat.TheclassesIstartedonlineareonlyreinforcingthat.Bestofall,it’ssomethingIcandorighthereinChesapeakeShores.Idon’thavetogo
chasingallovertheworldtofindfulfillment.”“Thereyougo,”hesaid
withsatisfaction.“Youcanclearlydefendyourselfagainstanyargumentstheymighttry.”Sheatethelastbiteofice
creaminthecontainer,thenputitaside.“We’reclose,butwe’renottherequiteyet.”“No?”“Weneedthatconlist.
That’swherethingscouldgettricky.Let’sstartwiththefactthattwodaysofvolunteerworkdon’texactlymakemeexperienced.AddinthatI’veneverrunanykindofbusinessbefore.Therearerulesandregulationstocontendwith,findingalocation,advertising,hiringhelp.”Shecoveredherface.“Idon’tevenknowwhatIdon’tknow.”
“So,there’salearningcurve,”Samsaid,dismissingherconcern.“Itwon’ttakeforevertogetuptospeed.Anddidn’tyoutellmethatJuliehadpromisedtobeyourmentor?Youhaveacousinwhocanhelpyoufindalocation,anunclewhocanhelpwithlegalwork.Soundstomeasifyou’recovered.”Hestudiedherintently,
thenadded,“Unlessyou’re
lookingforexcusesnottotakeachanceandpossiblyfail.”Herchinshotup.
“Failing’snotanoption.”Andjustlikethat,her
confidencethatshewasmakingtherightdecisionwasrestored.ShemovedquicklytogiveSamafiercehug.“Thankyou!”“Ididn’tdomuch.”“Yes,youdid.Youhelped
mesortthroughthisuntilIcouldseeitclearly.YoumademebelieveImightnotbemakingamistake.”“Sowhatifyouare?”he
asked.“Mistakesoftenprovidethecornerstoneforgettingthenextphaseofyourlifeexactlyright.”“O’Briensaren’tsupposed
tomakealotofmistakes,”shetoldhim.Hegrinned.“Thenyoucan
bethefirst.”“NotaroadIparticularly
wanttogodown,butthanksformakingitsoundlessthanawful.”“Ihavefaithinyou,”he
saidsimply.Surprisingly,thatwasjust
theboostherconfidenceneededasshemadeplanstofaceherfamilyandthelikelyruckusthatwasgoingtoensue.
12
Thursdaymorningattheday-carecenterwasaneye-opener.Afterallthepositivenotesshe’dmadethenightbefore,Carriefoundherselfquestioningwhethershewastrulycutoutforthis.Everychildatthecenterseemedto
behavingaverybadday.EventheunflappableJulieandLucyseemedtobeattheirwit’send.Andevenattheirworst,thechildrenwhopassedthroughCarrie’shouseonaregularbasishadneverbeenthisoutofcontrol.Ormaybeitwasjustthathere,thereweresomanymoreofthem,allneedingattentionanddisciplineatonce.AsLucytriedtocalmtwo
sobbingchildrenandAliciatookchargeofthreemorewho’dbeenthrowingfoodateachotherjustsecondsbefore,JulieandCarrietooktheinstigatorsofthetroubletoJulie’sofficeforasupervisedtime-out.“Iamsodisappointedin
you,”Juliesaid,lookingintoeachlittlefaceastheysatacrossfromherathertinydeskwithitsoverflowing
pilesoffolders.Jawswobbledandeyesfilledwithtears.Carrieknewtheydeserved
Julie’sharshwords,butshefeltsobadforthethreeofthem.Itwashardtobelievethatjustminutesagothey’dbeenhurlingfruitandtauntsatchildrenevenyoungerthantheywere.Thoughsheknewshe
oughttoletJuliehandleit,
shecouldn’tseemtostopherselffromasking,“Reed,youstartedit.Canyoutelluswhy?”Bigblueeyesmethers.
“BaileywasbeingmeantoJavier.Hesaidbadthingsabouthismom.BaileysaidJavier’smomdidn’tevenknowwhohisdadis.Andthattheyweren’trealAmericans.”CarrieheardJulie’ssharp
intakeofbreathandbarelymanagednottovisiblyreactherself.“Javier,isthattrue?Isthat
whatBaileysaid?”Julieaskedgently.JuliehadfilledCarrieinon
thestory.Javier’smotherhadcomeherelegallyfromElSalvadoryearsearlierwithJavier’stwooldersiblingstojoinhisfather.AfterJavier’sfatherhadbroughtthemhere
andbeforeJavierwasevenborn,themanabandonedthem.Hismotherworkedtwojobstokeepfoodonthetableandaroofovertheirheads.ShepitchedinatthecenterwhenevershehadthetimetohelppayJavier’sfees.And,thoughlegallydocumentedtoremain,shewasstudyinghardandworkingthroughtheprocesstobecomeacitizen.WithJulieholdinghis
gaze,Javierfinallynodded,hisexpressionsad.“Itisnottrue,whathesaid.
IknowwhomyfatherisandIamAmerican,”hesaidwithatouchofprouddefiance.Juliecamearoundthedesk
andputagentlehandonhisshoulder.“Iknow,sweetie.I’lldealwiththis.”SheturnedtoReed.“Iappreciateyourwantingtostandupforyourfriend,butnexttime,
justtellmeandletmehandleit,okay?Yousawhowquicklythingsgotoutofcontrol.Someonecouldhavegottenhurt.”“Ipromise,”Reedsaid
solemnly.“You’vebeencominghere
alongtime,”Juliecontinued.“Icountonyoutolookoutforthelittlerkids,butnotlikethis.”“Okay,”Reedsaid.“Ijust
knewitwaswrongandIdidn’tlikeit.Baileyshouldn’thavesaidsomethinglikethat.”“No,heshouldn’thave,”
Julieagreed.“I’lldealwithBailey.Carrie,youwanttotakethesetroublemakersoutontotheplaygroundandshootsomebasketswiththemwhileIhaveawordwithBailey.”“Absolutely,”Carriesaid.
“Icanwatcheverybody,”Reedprotested.“Youprobablycan,”Julie
agreed.“Butrulesarerules.Nobody’sontheplaygroundwithoutanadultpresent.”Withthechaosnowunder
controlanditscausedetermined,Carriefeltbetter.Beingoutsideinthefreshairandworkingoffsomeoftheiraggressioninamorepositivewaywasjustwhatthey
needed.Shecouldn’thelpwondering,though,ifshe’dhavebeenasquickasJulietorecognizethat.Orifshewouldhavebeensoincensedbytheracialprofilingbyachildtooyoungtoevenknowwhatthatmeant,shewouldhavebeenonthephonetellingofftheparents.“WhatifI’mnogoodat
this,afterall,”shemurmuredtoherselfasshefollowedthe
threeboysoutside.“Hey,Carrie,doyouwant
toplay,too?”ReedcalledoutwithagrinthatremindedherofDavey.Sherecognizedachallenge
whensheheardone.“You’reon,”shesaidatonce,thenstolethebasketballfromhisgraspandmadeaquickshot.Thethreeboysstaredather
inamazement.“Stillwantmetoplay?”
sheasked.“Youbet,”Javiersaid,his
toneheartfelt.“Youcanbeonmyteam.”“Howcome?”Reed
demanded.“I’mtheonewhoaskedher.”“Yes,butI’mtheshortest,”
Javierrepliedreasonably.“Ineedthehelp.”Carrielaughed.“It’sso
nicetobewanted,”shetoldthem.“Javier,I’llplaywith
youfirst,thenwe’llswitch.Howaboutthat?”“Worksforme,”Reed
said.Carrielookedintotheir
happy,expectantfacesandconcludedmaybeshewasn’tquiteasbadathandlingcontroversyasshe’dfeared.
***
Samdiscoveredawholenew
sidetoBobbywhenhetookhimovertotheschooltogetregisteredandtakealookaround.Sincehisdadhadbeenprettymellowandeasygoing,thekid’sstubbornstreakhadtohavecomefromtheWinslowgenes,buthecouldn’trecallLaurelorhimeverdiggingintheirheelsandthrowingaroyaltantrum.“I’mnotgoing,”Bobby
declaredmutinously,arms
crossedtightly,hisjawset.Hiseyeswelledwithtears.“Theschoollooksreally
nice,”Samsaid.“Anddidyouseetheplayground?Ithaslotsmoreequipmentthantheoneonthetowngreen.”“Idon’tcare.Iwanttogo
tomyoldschool.”Samclungtohispatience
byathread.Heunderstoodwhatwasgoingon,butcopingwithitwassomething
elseentirely.Hewasway,wayoutofhisdepth.HewassureCarriecouldhavecoaxedBobbyoutofthecarandintotheschoolbynow,butshortofdragginghim,hedidn’thaveaplanforaccomplishingthat.Reasondidn’tappeartobeworking.“Youalreadyknowlotsof
kidsherefromplayingT-ball,”heremindedBobby.“I’llbetsomeofthemwillbe
inyourclass.”“Ilikemyoldfriends.”Samseizedonabribe.
“Andmaybewecantakeatripsomeweekendtoseethem,butyouliveherenowandthisisgoingtobeyourschool.”“NO!”Theemphaticshoutechoed
inthecar.Samtookadeepbreathand
triedtoimaginewhatitmust
belikeforhisnephew.He’dlosthismomanddad.He’dmovedtoanewtownwithanunclehebarelyknew.Itprobablyshouldn’thavecomeasasurprisethatsoonerorlaterBobbywasgoingtodiginhisheels.Samtriedanothertack.“Itwasn’tthatlongago
thatIwasnewhere,too,”heremindedBobby.“Ididn’tknowanybodyintownexcept
myboss.Startinganewjobisalotlikestartingatanewschool.Itcanbeprettyscary.”“I’mnotscared,”Bobby
declared,thoughhecouldn’tquitebringhimselftomeetSam’sgaze.“Ofcoursenot.You’rethe
bravestkidIknow,”Samagreedreadily.“You’vebeenhandlingstuffthatwouldbehardforanybody.Thisisjust
onemorethingyouhavetoface,butIknowyoucandoit,Bobby.Andacoupleofweeksfromnow,I’llprobablyhavetroublegettingyoutocomehome,becauseyou’llbehavingsomuchfunwithallyournewfriends.It’sjustthisfirststepthat’shard.”“Whatifmyteacher’s
mean?”heasked,hisvoicesmallandfilledwiththefearhe’dbeentryingsovaliantly
tohide.“Ican’timagineany
teacherinthistownbeingmean,”Samsaid.“Wehaven’tmetonesinglemeanpersonyet,havewe?”“Iguessnot,”Bobby
concededgrudgingly.Inspirationstruck.“Ihave
anidea,”Samsaid.“Daveywenttothisschool.I’llbethismomknowsalltheteachers.Wanttogobythe
bookstoreandShannacantellyouallabouther?”Bobbynoddedeagerly.
Anythingtodelaytheinevitable,apparently.“Okay,we’lldothatfirst.”“Andthenlunchat
Sally’s?”Bobbywheedled.“I’dprobablyfeelbetterafteragrilledcheesesandwich.”Samnodded.“Butafter
lunchwecomestraightbackhereandgetyouregistered.
Deal?”Bobbyclearlyrealizedit
wasthebestdealhewaslikelytoget.“Iguess,”hesaideventually.Samstartedthecarand
droveintotown.Fiveminuteslater,he’dexplainedthesituationtoShanna.“So,doyouhappentoknowthefirst-gradeteacher?”Shanna’sexpression
brightened.“YoubetIdo.
HernameisAmyPennington.”“Isshemean?”Bobby
asked,trepidationinhisvoice.“Noway.She’sverynice.
She’sbeenhereforaverylongtime.”Shesatdownononeofthelowchairsinthechildren’ssectionrightnexttoBobby,thenleanedintoconfide,“Youknowwhosheremindsmeof?”
“Who?”Bobbyasked.“Mrs.Claus.”Bobby’seyeswentwide.
“Santa’swife?”Shannanodded,asmile
tuggingatherlips.“Don’tevertellherIsaidthat,though.Here,I’llshowyou.”ShepulledaChristmaspicturebookfromanearbyshelfandflippedthroughthepages,thenpointed.“Thereyougo.Youwaittillyou
meetMrs.PenningtonandthentellmeifI’mright.”Bobbygiggled,andSam’s
heartfilledwithamixofemotionshecouldn’tquiteidentify.Happinessatthesound,tobesure,andrelief,butitwasmorethanthat.Hefeltatinybitlikeadadwho’dfacedamonumentalhurdleandsomehowgottenoveritjustright.“Thanks,Shanna,”hesaid
asBobbyscamperedofftochooseanewbookforhiscollection.“Notaproblem.I’mso
gladyouthoughttobringhimhere.”Shegavehimareassuringlook.“Youmightwanttorememberthatyouwon’talwayshavealltheanswerswhenitcomestoyourkids,butknowingwhentoaskforhelpandwheretogotogetitissometimesjust
asimportant.”“Howaboutbribinghim
withthepromiseoflunchatSally’s?Isthatassmart?”Shelaughed.“Sometimes
youhavetowingitanddowhateverittakestogetthejobdone.Justdon’tbackdownonceyou’rebackattheschool.Remindhimhemadeadealwithyouandholdhimtoit.”Samsighed.“Doesitever
getanyeasier?”“You’vebeenatthisfor
what,amonthmaybe?I’vebeenatthisparentingthingforawholelotofyearsnow.I’llletyouknowwhenIfinallystarttoseeeasy.”Herexpressionsobered.“Ofcourse,ithelpsthatIhaveKevinrighttheretopickuptheslack.YoucouldalwaysaskCarrieforbackup.”“I’malreadyrelyingonher
alot,maybeeventoomuch,”hesaid.“Idon’twanttotakeadvantageofher.Igathershe’sstillrecoveringfromthelastjerkinherlifewhodidjustthat.”Shannalookedsurprised.
“ShetoldyouaboutMarc?”“EnoughthatIunderstand
whyshe’sgun-shyaboutgettinginvolvedwithanyoneelsesheperceivescouldbeusingher.”
“Recognizingthatjustprovesyou’reathousandtimesmoresensitivethanhewas.Youhavemystampofapproval,forwhateverthat’sworth.”Shegavehimalonglook.“Justdon’teverforcemetoadmitthatIwaswrongaboutyou.Ihatebeingwrong.”Helaughed.“Mostpeople
do.AndI’lldomybestnottohurtCarrie.That’sa
promise.”Shenodded.“Goodenough
forme.”Samlookedaroundfor
Bobbyandfoundhimabsorbedinabookhe’dchosen.“Comeon,kiddo.Let’spayforthatandgrabsomelunch.”Bobbyjumpedupand
headedfortheregister.SampaidShannaforthebook.“Ioweyoualotmorethanthis
fortheadvice.”“Nope.Thatwasonthe
house.”ShegrinnedatBobby.“RememberwhatIsaidaboutMrs.Pennington.That’sjustbetweenus.”SamthoughtofCarrie’s
secretthatBobbyhadinadvertentlyblurtedoutalltoorecently.“Youmightnotwanttocountonthat,”hewarnedShanna.Sheshrugged.“I’ll
recommendhertoBreeforthisyear’sChristmasproduction.Amywillbesoflatteredshe’llthankmeformakingthecomparison.”“Doyouhaveapositive
spinforeverything?”“Idothesedays,”she
repliedcheerfully.“That’swhatahappymarriagewilldoforyou.Youmightkeepthatinmind.”“SoMick’snottheonly
meddlerinthefamily,”hesaidwryly.“He’sjustthetipofthe
iceberg,”sheconfirmed.Forsomereasonthatdidn’t
botherSamhalfasmuchasitprobablyshould.
***
“DinnerwithTraceandmetonight!”Abbydeclaredinabrief,butpointedvoicemail.
Carrielistenedtohermom’smessageandrecognizedacommandwhensheheardit.Sighing,shereturnedthe
call.“Areyoucooking?”sheaskedwhenAbbypickedup.Hermomchuckled.“What
doyouthink?Iknowmyfood’snevergoingtolureyouoverhere.Jessissendingoveraroastedchicken,redblissmashedpotatoes,
veggiesandtheinn’schocolatedecadencecake.”“Wow!Isthisabig
occasion?”“Itisifoneofmy
daughtersiscomingfordinnerafteralongabsence,”Abbysaid.“Ijustsawyouattheinn,”
Carrieprotested.“Twoweeksago.Andyou
haven’tseenTraceforevenlonger,tosaynothingofyour
littlebrother.Wemissyou,sweetheart.”Sincesheknewshe’dbeen
deliberatelyavoidingthem,Carriecouldhardlydenythatherabsencehadgoneontoolong.“Whattime?”“Dinnerwillbeatseven,
butcomewheneveryou’reready.”Therewasaslightpausebeforehermotheradded,“Anyoneyou’dliketobringalong?”
Thereitwas,Carriethoughttriumphantly.Theulteriormotive.“Sothisisn’treallyaboutcatchingupwithme.It’saboutSam.Youwanttocheckhimout.”“Ithoughtitmightbenice
forhisnephewtogettoknowPatrick,”hermothercontradicted.“I’msureitwouldbe,butI
amnotbringingSamwithintenmilesofanyoneinthis
familyjustyet.O’Brienstendtogetideasandthentrytoramthemdownthethroatsofinnocentpeople.”“Haveyoueverknownme
todosuchathing?”Abbyasked,analmostbelievablenoteofhurtinhervoice.“OnlybecauseI’venever
datedanyoneseriouslyinChesapeakeShores,”Carriereplied.“Andbecauseyoudon’twantmetoaccuseyou
oftakingafteryourfather.”Abbylaughedthen.“Well,
that’strue.Okay,comeonyourown.We’lltrytomakedowithjustyourcompany.”“I’msoflattered.Love
you,Mom.”“Backatyou.Seeyou
tonight.”Assoonasshe’d
disconnectedthecall,CarrieregrettednotagreeingtobringSamandBobbyalong.
Atleasttheywouldhaveprovidedaverynicedistractionfromthenight’slikelyremainingmission:gettingafixonherplansforthefuture.Shecouldn’thelpwonderinghowsurprisedtheyweregoingtobewhenshearrivedwithawrittenlistofanswersallpreparedforthem.
***
Carriewalkedintothehousethathadbeenherhomeformostofherlifejustasherstepfathercamedownthestairslookingasifhe’djustbeenforaswimfullyclothed.Shecouldn’tseemtostopthegrinspreadingacrossherface.“DidPatrickwinthebath
war?”sheteased.“Ofcoursehedid,”Trace
said.“I’mnotsurewhyyour
motherinsistshetakeabathwhenhe’sspenttheentiredayswimming.NordoIunderstandwhyakidwho’salittlefishfrommorningtillnightbalksatgettingintoabathtub.”Carriekissedhischeek.
“Justtogiveyouaroughtime.”“Youandyoursisterwere
neverthisimpossible,”Tracesaid.
“Becausewewereyourlittleangels,”Carrierepliedsweetly.“AndwewantedyouandMomtogetbacktogether,sowewerealwaysonourverybestbehavior.”Hermotherwalkedintothe
foyerjustintimetooverhearher.“Idon’trecallanyofthat,”shesaid.“Irecallbathtimeswithprotestsatdecibellevelsthatcouldhaveregistereddowntheblock.I
recalltwogirlswhoranawayfromhomeandscaredthedaylightsoutofme.Irecall—”Carrielaughedandcuther
off.“Mom,youdon’tneedtorecountallofourbadbehavior.LetTracehavehisillusions.”Abbyslippedanarm
affectionatelyaroundTrace’swaist,thenjerkedaway.“You’resoakingwet!”
“ThusthecomparisonofPatrick’sbath-timebehaviortoCait’sandmine,”Carriesaid.SheglancedatTrace,thenshookherheadathisbesottedexpressionashestaredathiswife.Ithadalwaysbeenthatway.Unlikehermemoriesofherdadandthenonstoparguments,hermemoriesofhermomandTracewereallcoloredbytheabsoluteconvictionthatthey
lovedeachotherandherandCaitlynlikecrazy.“MaybeIshouldgo
upstairsandcheckonmylittlebrother,”shemurmuredandmovedtowardthestairs.“Ishesupposedtobeinbedorishecomingdownheretohavedinnerwithus?”“He’lljoinus,”Abby
respondeddistractedly.“Trace,youneedtogetoutofthesewetclothes.”
“Anythingyousay,”hesaid,awickedtwinkleinhiseyesashereachedforthebuttonsonhisshirt.“Nothere,”Abby
protested,butshewaslaughing.“Impossibleman!”Carrielaughedandleft
themtotheirflirting.That,shethoughtassheclimbedthestairs,waswhatshewanted,amarriageinwhichtheromancestayedalive.It
wasexactlyasBree,ShannaandHeatherhadsuggestedearlier.Shefoundherlittlebrother,
stilldampandwearingnothingmorethanhisfavoriteSpider-Manunderpants,sittingonthefloorplayingwithhisLEGO.Hergrandfather,who’dgivenPatrickthemostexpensivesethecouldfind,claimedhewasalreadyseeingsignsthat
Patrickwouldfollowinhisfootstepsasanarchitect.Giventhewobblingstructurehewasworkingonnow,Carriewasn’tsosure.“Hey,bro,”shesaid,
earningaglanceandagrin.“Didyoubringme
something?”heasked.Patrickwaswellawarethathisbigsisterswereputonthisearthtospoilhim.“Broccoliandspinach,”
shereplied,keepingherexpressionserious.“Yuck!”“Thatisnowaytoshow
yourappreciationforagift,”sheadmonished.“Broccoliandspinach
aren’tpresents,”herepliedreasonably.“Oh,okay,”shegrumbled.
Shereachedintoherpurseandtossedhimthebagofpennycandyshe’dbrought.
Hiseyeslitupandhetoreintothebag.“Holdit!Afterdinner,”she
saidfirmly.“OrMomwillkillusboth.”Hegiggled.“Shetold
GrandpaMicknever,evertobringcandyintothishouseagain.”“Hashepaidanyattention
toher?”Patricknodded.“Hehides
itoutside,andthenIgoout
andfindit.”Atypicallysneaky
GrandpaMickmaneuver,Carrieconcluded.Shereachedforthebag.“Thenmaybe,ifyoualreadyhavecandyhiddenaway,youshouldn’thavethis.”“Yes,Ishould,”hesaid,
tighteninghisgrip.“It’smypresent.Youcan’ttakeitback.”“Whathaveyougotfor
me,then?”Hescrambledupand
huggedher.“Thankyou.”Sheruffledhisstrawberry
blondhair,creatingahaloofthecurlshehated.“You’rewelcome,peanut.Nowputonyourpj’sandcomedownstairs.We’llbeeatingdinnersoon.Ihearthere’scakefordessert.”Thatearnedafistpump.
Hesearchedthrougha
drawer,tossingthingsonthefloor,tillhefoundapairofpajamasheliked,thenpulledthemon.Thetopwasinsideout,butCarrierefrainedfrompointingthatout.Evenasatoddlerherlittlebrotherhadhadawell-developedindependentstreak.Itwasonlystrengtheningashepreparedtogoofftopreschoolthisyear.Astheyreachedthetopof
thestairs,hegaveheranimpishgrin.“Wannarace?”Beforeshecouldreply,
he’dperchedonthebanisterandwasflyingdowntherailing.Carriewatched,heartinherthroat,tillhereachedthebottom.SherecognizedforthefirsttimehowmuchhermommusthaveagedwatchingherandCaittesttheirlimits.Asshefollowedherlittle
brotherdownstairsusingtheactualsteps,shespottedhermotherwaitingatthebottom.“Youknow,”Abbysaida
littletoocasually,“ifyou’regoingtoopenadaycare,you’regoingtohavetokeepamuchclosereyeonthekids.”Carrieregardedherwith
shock.“Whosaid...?Howdidyou...?”“Wordtravels,”shesaid.
“Youshouldknowthatbynow.”“ButIhaven’tdiscussed
thiswithanyoneexceptLuke.Hetookavowtokeepittohimself.”“AndIdidn’thearaboutit
fromLuke.”“Whothen?”“Doesitmatter?Isittrue?
Areyouconsideringopeningadaycare?”Carrieignoredthe
question,stilltryingtofigureoutwheretheleakhadbeen.Thenithither.Davey,ofcourse.SamhadtoldherhimselfthatBobbyhadletitsliparoundtheboys.Henrywouldneverrevealaword,butDaveywasaloosecannon.“Haveyouspentanytime
withKevinlately?”sheinquiredinnocently.Afaintblushtintedher
mother’scheeks.“I’vespokentoyouruncle.Why?”“Didhehappentopass
alonganytidbitsoffamilygossip?”Hermomfrowned.“Okay,
yes,butwhatIwanttoknowiswhymybrotherknewaboutthisbeforeIdid?”“Hedidn’thearitfromme,
ifthatmakesyoufeelanybetter,”Carriesaid,andexplainedthelikelyscenario
thatledfromBobbytoDaveytoKevin.Abbylaughed.“Oh,sweet
heaven,ifthenextgenerationisstartingthisearlyspreadingfamilygossip,we’llneverbeabletokeepanothersecret.”Shelinkedherarmthrough
Carrie’sandledthewayintothekitchen.“Youcanfillusinoverdinner.”Tracelookedup.“Fillusin
aboutwhat?”
“Carriehasdecidedwhatshewantstodowithherlife.”Herstepfather’sgaze
narrowed.“Doesitinvolvegoinganywherenearthatfashiondesigner?”“Definitelynot,”Carrie
assuredhim.“Okay,then.Whateverit
is,I’mallforit.”Carrieheardthe
unconditionalsupportinhisvoiceandfeltherheartlift.
Sheknewhemeanteveryword.FromthemomentTracehadcomeintotheirlives,he’dbeennotonlyadevotedhusbandtohermom,butasteadyinginfluenceforherandCait.Hethoughttheywerecapableofanything.And,inpart,becauseofthatunwaveringfaithinthem,theybelievedit,too.
13
“YouhavetounderstandthatI’mjustatthebeginningstagesofthinkingthisthrough,”CarrietoldhermomandTraceafteraboredPatrickhadgonebacktohisroomafterdinner.“Idon’thaveallthedetailsworked
out.Oranyofthem,forthatmatter.Ijusthavelists,awholelotofverylonglists.”“You’vealwaysbeena
naturalwithkids,”Abbysaid,herexpressionthoughtful.“Youknow,therewasatimewhenIthoughtyoumightwanttogotomedicalschooljustlikeyoursisterandbecomeapediatrician.”“Notme,”Carriesaidat
once.“Theprocesstakesway
toolong.YouknowhowimpatientIam.Icouldn’twaittogetonwithmylife,eventhoughIobviouslydidn’tknowquitewhatIwantedthatlifetobe.Asforthewholemedicalthing,that’sCaitlyn’spassion.”“Andyouthinkopeninga
day-carecentercouldbeyours?”Traceasked,studyingherclosely.“Youhonestlythinkyou’llbe
happystayinghereandlookingafterkids?Kids,whoaren’tyourown,thatis.IthinkyourmotherandIfiguredyou’dbesettleddownwithawholebroodbynow.”Carrieshrugged.“SodidI,
butithasn’thappened.I’mtryingtofindanalternativethatwillbeagoodfit,somethingIcanbeasexcitedaboutasCaitisaboutmedicine.”
“It’sabigdecision,”heremindedher,asifsheweren’talreadyverywellawareofthat.Carrieknewhewas
makinghispointonlytobesureshewasn’tdivingintosomethingthisdemandingonawhim.Takingcareofotherpeople’schildrenwasahugeresponsibility.She’dseenthatfirsthandsinceshe’dbeenworkingwithJulie.Andonce
she’dcommittedtoit,itwasn’tsomethingshecouldwalkawayfromonyetanotherwhim.Peoplewouldbecountingonher.“Iknowitmustseemasif
thiswholeideahascometomeoutoftheblueandIcan’tdenythatafewmonthsago,ithadneveroncecrossedmymind,”sheconceded.“Whathappened?”Trace
asked.
“YoumeanbesidesrealizingthatIwasinadead-endrelationshipandquittingmyjobwithnoprospectsforanotherone?”shesaiddryly.“LeavingMarcandthatjob
werethesmartestthingsyou’ddoneinawhile,ifyouaskme,”Tracetoldher,noteventryingtohidethedisdainhe’dmanagedtomaskwhiletherelationshiphadbeennewand,she’d
claimed,everythingshe’deverwanted.“Youweretoogoodforhimandthatjobworeyouout.Itdidn’tmakeyouhappy.”“Ilovedmyjob,”she
protested.AndatfirstMarchadbeenasattentiveasshecouldpossiblyhavewanted.Itwasonlylaterthatshe’drealizedthatallthatattentionshe’dbaskedinwasnothingmorethanajadedattemptto
makesureshecontinuedtodohisbidding.Traceregardedher
skeptically.“Whichpartofthejobmadeyouwanttojumpoutofbedinthemorning?Andbeforeyouanswer,remembermyhistory.Iwasdraggedintobankingbymyfather—anice,stablecareerpathIwassupposedlydestinedtofollow.Itwouldhavemeant
goodmoneyandstabilityforsure,butIhatedeveryminuteofit.Itwasn’tuntilIconvincedDadthatmysisterwasmoresuitedtothatcareerandIwasfreetocontinuewithmydesignbusinessthatIwastrulyhappy.”Hegaveheralonglook.“SoIknowalittlebitabouthowimportantitistochoosewhatyouweretrulymeanttodoandnotletanyoneoranythingstandin
yourway.”Carrieheardwhathewas
saying.“Okay,itwasn’tthePRjobIlovedsomuch.ItwasMarc.You’rerightaboutthat.Iwantedtoimpresshim.”Sheshrugged.“AndIhappenedtobegoodatpublicrelations.There’salottobesaidjustforbeinggoodatwhatyoudo.Especiallyinthatworld,praiseisseductive.AndIwantedtodo
somethingthatwouldmakethefamilytakenoticeandbeproudofme.”“Darling,we’vealways
beenproudofyou,”hermothersaid,lookingshocked.“Sure,insortofayou’re-
our-daughter-and-we’ll-love-you-no-matter-whatway.Mom,youandeveryoneelseinourfamilysetthebarprettydarnhigh.”Abbysighed.“Isuppose
wedid,andyourgrandfather’scertainlynotaboveremindingeveryoneabouthisloftystandards.Still,weallknowhowthatjobworkedout.It’soveranddonewithnow,”hermothersaidbriskly.“Telluswhyyouthinkopeningadaycareiswhatyouweremeanttodo?Howdidyoureachthatconclusion?”“IwastalkingtoLuke
aboutmyoptions.Wejuststartedbattingaroundideasandhepointedoutthathalfthekidsinourfamilyareinandoutofmyhouseonaregularbasis.I’mgoodwiththem.Ilovebeingwiththem.”“Butthat’sallpretty
casual,”hermomsaidworriedly.“Thiswillbeafull-timecommitment,Carrie.It’snotsomethingtotake
lightly.”“Iknowthat,”shesaid
impatiently.Shereachedinherpocketandpulledoutthepro-conlistshe’dprinted.Shehandeditovertohermom.“Andthat’swhyI’mtakingitveryseriously.Lookthoseoverandyou’llseejusthowcarefullyI’vebeenanalyzingthis.”“Prosandcons?”Abby
saidwithasmile.“Thisis
somethingyoursisterwoulddo.”“SinceI’vebeenwatching
heranalyzethingstodeathpracticallysincebirth,Idecidedtogiveitatry,”Carriesaidwryly.“AndI’vebeenvolunteering,justforafewdayssofar,atadaycareoutsideoftown.Theowner’sbeeninthebusinessforyears.She’spromisedtobemymentorandguidemethrough
everythingIneedtodo,butonlyifIprovetoherthatIcanhandlethejob.There’snotellinghowlongI’llhavetopaymyduesbeforeshe’sconvinced,soIdefinitelywon’tbetakingthenextstepimpulsively.I’meventakingacoupleofclassessherecommendedonline.”“Ah,sothedaycare’s
whereyou’vebeengoingatthecrackofdawn,”hermom
concluded.“Nowitmakessense.Icouldn’tbelieveitwhensomeonesaidmylittlenightowlwasupandoutbeforedaybreak.”Carriedidn’tevenbother
askingwho’dfiledthatreport.Ithardlymattered.ShelookedexpectantlyfromTracetohermom,tryingtogaugetheirreactions.“So,whatdoyouthink?”
sheproddedwhenshe
couldn’tstandthesilenceanotherminute.“Nowthatwe’vetalked,I
canseehowitwouldbeexactlyrightforyou,”hermothersaid.“I’malittlesurprisednoonesuggesteditsooner.”Carrierolledhereyes.
“Who?GrandpaMick?Youknowhe’sgoingtohaveplentytosayaboutmewastingmypotentialby
babysitting.”“AndIthinkyou’reselling
himshort,”Abbycontradicted.“Hewantsyoucloseby.Thiswillkeepyouhere.Hewantstoseeyouhappy.Ifthisachievesthat,he’llhavenocomplaints.”“Anditshouldn’tmatter
whatMickoranyoneelsethinks,”Traceemphasized.“Ifthisiswhatyouwant,that’sallthatcounts.Have
youspokentomydadorLailaatthebankaboutgettingasmall-businessloanforyourstart-up?”Carrieheldupherhands.
“Slowdown.I’mnotthatfaralongyet.AndIstillhavetrust-fundmoneytounderwritethefirst-yearcostswhenIamready.”Traceshookhishead.
“SpeaktoDadormysister.Don’tputyourtrustfundat
risk.Partofopeninganybusinessisestablishinggoodcredit.Letthemhelpwiththat.ItwillmakeDad’sday.Youknowhe’salwayshadasoftspotforyouandyoursister.AndanytimeanO’Briensucceeds,it’sgoodforthebankandgoodforthetown.He’swellawareofthat.”“Isupposeitwouldn’thurt
totalktohimwhenthetime
isright,”Carrieagreed,thoughshewasn’tenthusiasticaboutlayingoutherplansforamanashardheadedaboutbusinessasTrace’sdad.He’dspoteverysingleflawandmakenoconcessionsbecauseshewasfamily.“Seemstomethattheend
ofsummerandthestartoftheschoolyearwouldbeagoodtimetogetthingsrolling,”
Abbysuggestedcasually.“Noway,”Carriesaid,
horrified.“Schoolstartsinacoupleofweeks.Thisisn’tsomethingIcanrushinto.EvenifIwantedtoopenquicklyandonaverysmallscale,therearetoomanyregulationsandlicensestodealwith.PlusIhavetofindalocation,dorenovations.ThereareamillionthingsthatneedtobedonebeforeI
couldevenconsideropening.”“StopbyandseeSusie
aboutsuitableproperty,”Abbysuggested.“Sheknowseveryhouseorretailspacearoundherethat’szonedforsomethinglikethis.”Carriestudiedhermom.
Somethingwasgoingonhere.“Whyareyousuddenlyinsucharushformetomakethishappen?It’snotjustso
I’llstaycloseby,isit?I’vealreadytoldyouIintendtostayinChesapeakeShores.Thatdecisiondefinitelyisn’tawhim.Iwantthistowntocontinuetobehome.”Abbyglancedacrossthe
tableatTrace,whonodded.“Thethingis,”shebegan,colorbloominginhercheeks,“we’reexpectinganotherbaby.”Carriestaredatherin
shock.“Ababy?But,Mom,youcan’tbe.You’re...”“Old.Goaheadandsayit,”
Abbysaid,herexpressionwry.“Believeme,nooneismoreshockedthanthetwoofus.IthoughtIwasalotclosertomenopausethanIwastobecomingamotheragain.”“Whoknows?Haveyou
toldanyoneelse?”Carrieasked.“No.Sofar,it’sjustus,”
Tracesaid,thencautioned,“Andwewantittostaythatwayforanothercoupleofmonths.Butyoucanseewhytheideaofadaycarerighthereintownandrunbysomeonewetrustcouldbealifesaverforus.TryingtokeepaneyeonPatrickwhileworkingathomealmostdrovemeoverthebrink.Withthisbaby,Iwanthimorheroutofthehouseandin
thehandsofaprofessional.YourmomandIareagreedonthat.I’mnotexpectinghertoputhercareeronthebackburner,either,soreliabledaycareisamust.”Carriebouncedoutofher
chairandhuggedhermom,thenTrace.“Iamso,sohappyforyou.DoesCaitlynknow?”“Notyet,”Abbyreplied.
“Wewantedtowaitalittle
longer.We’llfillherinnexttimeshecomeshomeforaweekend.”“ThenIdon’tsuppose
Patrickknowshe’sgoingtobeabigbrother,”Carriesaid.“Absolutelynot,”Trace
said.“Thepint-sizeO’Briensarenotevenremotelytrustworthywithsecretsofanykind.Theleakingofyournewsisproofenoughofthat.”
“Pointtaken,”Carrieagreed.“RemindmetobeatthetaroutofDaveynexttimeIplayavideogamewithhimjusttogeteven.”“Hey,it’snotallbad,
havingusinonyourplans,isit?”hermomasked.“Actually,no.Your
enthusiasmhasbeenreassuring,evenifIhavediscoveredit’sduetoanulteriormotive.”Shestudied
hermotherworriedly.“Areyoufeelingokay?Isthepregnancygoingokaysofar?”“I’malittletired,butthe
doctorsayseverything’srightontrack.We’lldoanamniocentesisdowntheroadjustlikewedidwhenPatrickwasontheway.”“We’renotgoingtotake
anychanceswithyourmother’shealthorthe
baby’s,”Traceassuredher.“Well,ifyouneed
anything,anythingatall,I’mjustaphonecallaway,”Carrietoldbothofthem.“Iamsohappyforyou.AndGram’sgoingtobeoverthemoon.”Abbysmile.“Shewillbe,
won’tshe?There’snothingNelllovesmorethananewO’Brientofussover.”Thinkingofallthebabies
inthefamily,Carriefiguredhergreat-grandmotherwouldbeinseventhheavenforalongtimetocome.
***
ForafullweekafterdinnerwithhermomandTrace,Carrietriedtoabsorbtheirbignews,whilecontinuingtobabysitJacksonandvolunteerattheday-carecenter.She
didn’thearmuchfromSambeyondaquickcalltoletherknowthathe’dsuccessfullyenrolledBobbyinschool.“NowIjusthavetoget
himinthedooronthefirstday,”he’dsaid,soundingunconvincedthathecoulddoit.“He’sgoingtobefine,”
Carriehadassuredhim.“Itwouldhelpifyou’dtell
methatinperson,”he
suggestedslyly.She’dlaughed.“Remind
menexttimewe’reatGram’s.”“Nosoonerthanthat?”“Sorry.I’mswamped.”Anditwastrue.Asher
confidenceinherplanhadstartedtogrow,impatiencehadsetin.Shedownloadedformsandstudiedtherequirementsforlicensing.Then,whenshe’dbeenatthe
centerforthreeweeks,shesatdownwithJulie.“HowamIdoing?”she
askeddirectly.Juliesmiled.“Iwondered
howlongitwasgoingtotakebeforeyoustartedgettingantsytogetstarted.”“TobehonestI’vebeen
hopingforsomesignfromyouthatyoufeelI’mqualified.”“Qualified?Inlessthana
month?”“Okay,maybenot
qualified,butcapableofgettingthere.”“Truthfully,I’vebeen
impressed,”Julieadmitted.“Somuchso,infact,thatIwishIcouldtalkyouintostayingrighthereandcontinuingtoworkwithme.”ShestudiedCarrie,thenshookherhead.“Butyouwanttoopenyourownplace,
don’tyou?”Carrienodded.“Ireallydo.
Workingwithyouhasjustsolidifiedmyresolve.Thismayhavestartedonawhim,butI’mcommittedtoitnow,butonlyifyoubelieveI’mgoingtobeabletodothisthewayitshouldbedone.AndI’mnotgoingtobailonthetrainingI’vebeengettinghereoronmyclasses.Iwillkeepcominghereatleasta
coupleofdaysaweekuntilallthepiecesofmyplancometogether.IoweyouthatandIcanuseeverysecondofpracticalexperienceIcanget.”Julienodded.“Okay,then,
youhavemyblessingtogetstartedwithyourownplans.”ShegesturedtowardthetabletCarriehadbroughttothemeeting.“Getreadytotakesomenotes.We’llstart
yourcrashcourserightnow.”Forthenexttwohours,she
filledCarrieinoneverythingfromthecostsofdoingbusiness,thelicensingprocess,liabilityinsurance,whattochargeandthebestqualitytoysandsuppliesavailableandwheretogetthem.“Andthat’sjustthetipof
theiceberg,”Julieconcluded.“Butit’senoughfortoday.
Yougetstartedonallofthatandwhenyou’reherenexttime,we’llgooversomemore.”ShesmiledatCarrie’s
apparentlyglazedexpression.“Don’tworry.Itwillallfallintoplaceandstarttomakesenseonceyoustartchippingawayatthatlist.Andwhenyoufindaplaceyoulike,invitemedownandI’llwalkthroughitwithyouandhelp
youfigureoutwhatchangeswillberequiredtomeetcode.It’sbeenyearssinceI’vebeentoChesapeakeShoresdespitehowclosebyitis.I’veheardwonderfulthingsabouttheInnatEaglePoint.MaybeLucyandIwillspendamother-daughterweekendthere.”“You’reagodsend,”Carrie
saidfervently.“AndmyauntJessownstheinn.I’lltalkher
intocompingyourroom.”Juliesmiled.“Well,how
aboutthat?Iwon’tsayno.AsforwhateverI’vedonetohelpyou,it’sinmyowninterestsasmuchasyours.Ican’tverywellletsomeoneI’vetrainedgooffandmakeamessofthings,canI?”“I’llgetstartedonallthis
tonight,”Carriesaid.“BythetimeIseeyoudayaftertomorrow,I’llhaveafull
reportonwhatI’veaccomplished.”Juliegavealittlenodof
satisfaction.“Ofcourseyouwill.”AsCarriewasleavingher
office,Juliecalledherback.“I’mproudofyou.You’vecaughtonquickly.You’veneveronceblinkednomatterwhatI’veaskedofyou.Andyou’regreatwiththekids.”Touchedbythepraisefrom
awomanshe’dcometorespect,Carrieblinkedbacktears.“Thankyou.”“Don’tthankmeyet.There
aregoingtobedaysinthemonthsandyearstocomewhenyou’llprobablyhatemeforencouragingyoutotakethison.”Carriecouldn’timagine
suchaday,butshenodded.Juliehadn’tbeenwrongaboutanythingelse.Shewas
probablyrightaboutthis,too.Butitdidn’treallymatter.She’dneverbeenmoreexcitedaboutanythingshe’devertackledbefore.AndO’Briensweremadeoftoughstuff.Difficultiesdidn’tdeterthemonelittlebit.
***
SamwasonhiswaytothepizzashopwithBobbyfora
celebrationofthefirstdayofschoolwhenhespottedCarrieheadingtowardO’Brien’s.Hechangeddirectionandinterceptedher.Asmilespreadacrossherfacewhenshesawthem.“Afirstdayofschool
celebration?”sheguessedrightaway.Bobbynodded
enthusiastically.“We’rehavingpizza!”
“Notexactlyararetreat,”shecommented,hergazeonSam.Hecaughttheglimmerof
amusementinhereyes.“I’mreformed,butnotobsessedaboutit,”hetoldher.“Besides,thisisBobby’scelebration,soit’shischoice.Wanttojoinus?”“Yes!”Bobbysaideagerly.
“Please,Carrie.”“Well,Icanhardlyturn
downthechancetohavedinnerwithtwohandsomeguys.Itwillhavetobeaquickone,though.Ihaveatonofworktodotonight.”Samcastacautiousglance
towardBobby,whowasalreadyrunningaheadtothepizzashop.“Day-careplans?”Shenodded,abrilliant
smilelightingupherface.“I’mmovingforwardwith
Julie’sstampofapproval,”sheconfirmed.“Onlymymomandstepfatherknow,though,sopleasekeepittoyourselfalittlelonger.I’mgoingtoseeSusietomorrowaboutlocatingaproperty,soIsuspecteveryoneinthefamilywillknowafterthat.”Samwincedatthemention
ofSusie.“What?”Carrieasked,
obviouslycatchinghisguilty
expression.“I’vebeenmeaningtocall
hereversinceIgottotownaboutlookingathouses.Timekeepsgettingawayfromme.Mack’sevenmentionedtometwicenowthatSusie’swonderingifI’mjustgoingtogoonlivingattheinn.”“Itisaprettycomfortable
place,”Carriesaid.“Butit’snotahome.And
it’sabovemybudgetlong-
term,evenwiththedeepdiscountJesshasbeengivingme.”Hewavedoffthetopic.“I’llgettoSusiesometimethisweek.RightnowIwanttohearallaboutyourplans.”“Hurryup!”Bobby’s
urgentcommandinterruptedthem.Samsighed.“ButIsuppose
now’snotthetime.”“Probablynot.”“Idon’tsupposeyou’ve
changedyourmindaboutdating?”heaskedhopefully.“Wecouldhaveaquiet,adults-onlydinnerthisweekend.”“Didn’tyoutellmethat
Bobby’sstilluneasyaboutbeingatanewschool?”“Yes,buttodayseemedto
gookay.”“That’soneday,Sam.
Giveitaweekandthenwe’lltalkaboutit.Ineedsome
spacetopullallthispaperworktogether,anyway.Andyouneedtospendyoursparetimehouse-hunting.”Samconcededdefeat
reluctantly.“I’mcallingyoufirstthingonMondayandaskingyouout,”heinformedher.“Andmakenomistake,I’mnottakingnoforananswer.”“ThenI’llpracticesaying
yes,”shetoldhimwithagrin.
“Whoknows?Imightbeverygoodatit.”
***
Thenextmorning,determinedtoturnherdreamintoreality,shewasintherealestateofficefiveminutesafteritopened,sittingacrossfromSusie.“Ineedahouse,”shetold
hersecondcousin.
Susieregardedherblankly.“Youhaveahouse.”“Butit’snotzonedfor
whatIhaveinmind.”“Andthatwouldbe?”“I’mplanningtoget
licensedandopenasmallday-carecenter.”Ratherthanapplaudingher
decision,asCarriehadexpected,Susiefrowned.“Iknowyoulovehaving
thekidsoverforvisitsevery
day,butanactualdaycare,Carrie?Haveyoureallythoughtthisthrough?”Carriediscoveredthat
havingeachnewpersonshetoldquestionherdecisionwasannoying.“OfcourseIhave,”shesaidimpatiently.“Sinceeverybodyinthefamilyhasbeenregardingmelikeaslackerformonthsnow,Ithoughtthiswouldcomeasgoodnews.Carrie’s
finallyfiguredoutwhattodowithherlife.Yippee!”Susie’ssmilewasonly
halfhearted.“Nobodythinksyou’reaslacker.”“Seriously?Igetalecture
fromGrandpaMickonanalmost-dailybasis.IcouldseetheworryeverytimeMomlookedatme,atleastuntilIfilledherinaboutthis.I’mprettysureGramhasbeenlightingextracandlesat
church.”Susiefinallychuckled.
“BeinganO’Briendoescomewithafairshareofpressure,”sheconceded.“Butdaycare?IthoughtyouweredestinedtoreturntoParisorMilan.WhysettleforChesapeakeShores,whenyou’veledsuchaglamorouslife?Weallenviedyougettingtoworkinsuchamazinglocations.”Carrieshrugged.“I’m
hardlysettling.Therealityis,I’manO’Brienandthisishome.DespitealltheworriedlooksI’veenduredsincecomingback,IknowthisiswhereIbelong.Openingadaycarejustseemslikeanatural.I’vedonemyhomeworkonthenumberofchildrenwithworkingparentsandtheoptionsavailable.Theonlyfacilityopenrightnowisatthechurchandit’sfilledto
capacity.Thetownneedsaday-carecenter.”“Soit’snotenoughforyou
thatmostofthekidsinourfamilyarealreadyinandoutofyourhouseonadailybasis?”Carriethoughtshehearda
surprisinglybitternoteinSusie’svoice.Shealsothoughtsheunderstoodit.Thankstothatadoptionfallingthroughatthelast
minute,Susiewasboundtobetouchyaboutanythinghavingtodowithkidsthesedays.Regardinghercousinwith
sympathy,shesaid,“I’msorrytheadoptiondidn’tworkoutthistime,Susie,buttherewillbeotherchances.YouandMackwillhavechildren.”“I’mdone,”Susiesaid
flatly.“AndIdon’twantto
talkaboutit.”“IsMackreadytogive
up?”Susiejuststaredather,her
expressioncompletelyshutdown.Carriegotthemessageanddroppedthesubject.“I’msorryifIupsetyou,”
Carrieapologized.Susiesighed.“AndI’m
sorryfortakingmylousymoodoutonyou.”“Please.I’mfamily,andI
knowhowbadlyyouwantchildren.Ido,too,butIknowit’snotthesame.”“Right.Youcouldget
pregnantanytime.Ican’t.”Susiewincedathertone.“Sorry.Again.It’sironichowalloftheO’Briensseemtoprocreateatthedropofthehat,andthenthere’sme.Lookatyoursister.Caitlyndidn’twanttogetmarriedorhaveababy,butheresheis
withagreathusbandandadarlinglittleboy,andI’mnotsuresheappreciateseitherone.”“Ofcourseshedoes,”
Carriesaid,immediatelyjumpingtothedefenseofhertwin.“Itwasjustabigadjustment.Shehadherwholelifemappedout.”“Iguesswhattheysay
aboutbest-laidplansistrue,”Susiesaid.“Theydotendto
goawry.IthoughtifIcouldeventuallyconvinceMacktolookatmetwice,we’dlivehappilyeverafter.”“YouandMackaresolid,”
Carrieremindedher.Susie’seyesturnedmisty.
“Iknow,andIthankGodforthateverysingleday.Mackstoodbyme—heevenmarriedmenotknowinghowlongImightlive.Mostmenwouldhavebailed.”
“Andyou’llgetthatbaby,justmaybenotonthetimetableyou’dhopedfor,”Carriesaidconfidently.Susiemanagedafaint
smile.“FromyourlipstoGod’sear,”shewhispered.Carriesqueezedherhand.
“It’llhappen.O’Briensalwaysmakethingshappen.”Susiedrewinadeep
breath,thensquaredhershouldersandfacedthe
computer.“Let’sseeaboutfindingaspotforthatdaycare.Whoknows?MaybeI’llcomeandworkforyouandgetmyfixofbabiesthatway.”“Suze,”Carriesaidquietly,
thenwaitedforhercousintofaceher.“Therewillalwaysbeaspotforyou,evenifyoujustwanttospendyourlunchhourhangingout,okay?”“Thanks.”
Buttheybothknewthatcaringforotherpeople’schildren,nomatterhowrewarding,wouldneverquitefilltheemptyplaceineitheroftheirhearts.
***
AfewdayslaterCarriehadjustpulledahotcookiesheetfromtheovenwhenhergrandfatherbargedintoher
kitchenwithoutbotheringtoknock.“What’sthisIhearabout
youopeningaday-carecenter?”Mickasked,hisvoiceboomingthroughthesmallspace.“You’vebeentalkingto
Susie,”sheconcluded.“ActuallyIwastalkingto
mybrother.JefftoldmeSusiehasbeenshowingyoupropertiesandthatyou’ve
alreadyappliedforalicense.Whatsortofnonsenseisgoingoninthatheadofyours?Whydidn’tyoudiscussthiscockamamyplanwithmebeforeyoudivedin?”Carriedroppedthecookie
sheetontothetablewithaclattershehopedwouldbeahintofjusthowannoyedshewas.Naturallyhergrandfatherwasoblivious.
She’dexpectedthisreactionfromhim,butthatdidn’tkeepitfromhurting.“You’reanO’Brien,”he
declared.“You’remeanttobedoinggreatthings,notbabysittingotherpeople’schildren.”“Evenifsomeofthose
childrenareO’Briens?”Hescowledather.“There
areplentyofpeopleinthisfamilytolookoutforour
own.Notaoneofthemneedstobeinsomeimpersonaldaycare.”“SonowI’mproviding
impersonalcare?”shechallenged.“YouknowwhatImean,”
hesaid.“ActuallyIdo.Youmean
thatI’mlettingyoudownyetagain.Youdidn’tapproveofitwhenIwasinEuropeworkinginfashion.Thenyou
weredisappointedinmeforquittingthatjobandcomingbackhere.YouwerethoroughlyfrustratedwhenIdidn’tjumponthebandwagonandtakeupCaitlyn’sfavoritecauseinAfrica.Sorry,GrandpaMick,IguessI’mjustdestinedtobeahugefailureinyoureyes.”Asherheatedwordsand
thetearsstinginghereyesregisteredwithhim,he
lookedstunned.“Ineversaidanysuchthing.”“Didn’tyou?Worse,you
justreferredtosomethingI’mtrulyexcitedaboutasacockamamyidea.”“Carrie,sweetheart,allI
wantisforyoutobehappy.”“AndIthinkthiswillmake
mehappy,”shetoldhim,swipingangrilyathertears.“Ireallydo.Ilovekids.RightnowIdon’tseeanychildren
ofmyowninmyimmediatefuture,sothisworksforme.I’mgoodwithkids.Askanyone.”“Well,ofcourseyouare.
I’veseenyouatthehousereadingstoriesandplayinggameswithallyourlittlecousins.You’veagift,noquestionaboutit,”hesaid,clearlybackpedalingasfastashecould.Hisexpressionturned
thoughtful.“Seemstome,though,whatyoureallyneedisamanandahousefulofkidsofyourown.”Carriegavehimahorrified
look.“Donotgetanyideasaboutmatchmaking,GrandpaMick.Imeanit.RightnowIneedtofocusonthisnewbusiness.Iwanttodoitright.Whenit’supandrunningandsuchahugesuccessthatevenyouwillbeimpressed,then
I’llthinkaboutmysociallife.Andwhenthatdaycomes,IwantyoutorememberthatI’mperfectlycapableoffindingtherightmanwithoutanyhelpfromyou.”Hergrandfatherdidn’t
appearimpressedbyherdeclaration.“Areyou,now?IsthereonelurkingaboutI’venotseen?ThatSamWinslowfellow,perhaps?”“LeaveSamoutofthis.
Therearelotsofmenlurkingabout,asyouputit,”shesaid,silentlybeggingforgivenessfortheblatantlie.“EverywhereIturn,infact.”“Thenyou’llbebringing
onetoSundaydinner,Iimagine,”hesaid.Checkandcheckmate,she
thoughtwitharesignedsigh.“Sure,”shesaid,wonderingwhoshemightdraftfortheassignment.Itneededtobe
somebodytoughenoughtowithstandMick’sscrutinyandwillingtoplaythegameforafewhoursonaSundayafternoon.Becausehisnamehadjust
comeupandbecauseanimageofSampoppedintoherheadalltooregularly,sheconsideredhimasapossibility.Badidea,shetoldherself.Thenagain,atleasthewouldcomeawaywitha
decentmealandsomenewfriendsforhislittleboy.Shewouldn’tgolooking
forhim,butiftheycrossedpathsbetweennowandSunday,whatwastheharminasking?Sheglanceduptofindher
grandfathermunchingonawarmchocolate-chipcookieandregardinghersuspiciously.“Youaren’tthinkingof
tryingtoputoneoveronme,areyou?”heasked.Shemusteredhermost
innocentexpression.Giventhenumberoftimesshe’dbeencalledupontouseitwiththisveryman,shehaditdownpat.“Absolutelynot,”shetoldhim.Hegavealittlenodof
satisfaction.“ThenI’llseeyouonSunday.”Hepickedupanother
coupleofcookiesandleftthroughthekitchendoor.Carriesighedheavily.Thatgaveherexactlythreedaystofindthemanofherdreams...oratleastsomeonewillingtoplaytherole.
14
OnSaturdaySamstoodjustinsidethefrontdoorofthelittlehouseonWillowBrookRoadasBobbyracedthroughtherooms,thesoundofhisfootstepsontheshinyhardwoodfloorsechoingintheemptyspace.
He’djustboughthimselfahouse,hethought,amazementandpanicwashingoverhim.Herehewas,amanwho’dneverplannedtoputdownroots,andhewassuddenlytheownerofahousewithamortgageandtheparentofagrief-strickenlittleboy.SomewhereGodmustbehavingareallygoodlaughathisexpense,becausethe
carefreelifehe’denvisionedforhimselfhaddefinitelygoneupinsmoke.Hewasalittleastonished
athowquicklyandsmoothlythepurchasehadhappened.Whenhe’dfinallycalledafterhisdinnerwithCarrie,Susiehadleapedintoaction.She’dclearlybeenhighlymotivatedandapparentlyinChesapeakeShoreswhenO’Brienswereinyourcorner,creditreports
andpaperworkcouldbehandledwithlightningspeed.Susiehadn’twastedtime
dragginghimallovertown.She’dbroughthimstraighttothishouseandletthecozylittlecottagespeakforitself.Sammighthavehesitatedfordays,weighedthemeritsofbuyingahouseatall,ratherthanrenting,butBobby’sinitialenthusiasmhadbeencontagious.Listeningtohis
exuberantshoutsechothroughtheemptyroomsandwatchinghiseyeswidenwithdelightwhenhespottedbothaswingandatreehouseinthebackyardhadclinchedthedealforSam.Everythingafterthathadbeenallaboutthepaperwork.“Nottoworry,”Susiehad
assuredhim.“I’vealreadyspokentothesellerandyoucanmoveinassoonasyou
wantto.Mackspoketothebankandreassuredthemyourjobissolid.Allyouneedtodoissignanendlessnumberofpapers,packup,getsomefurnitureinhereandyou’reallset.MycousinConnorwillhandleallthelegalities.”Samhadbeenastonished.
“Justlikethat?Dothingsalwaysgothissmoothly?I’veheardhorrorstoriesaboutbuyingahouse.”
She’dsimplyshrugged.“Inthistown,connectionshelp.”Theycertainlydid,Sam
concluded.He’devenbeenabletoarrangeforthebedshe’dboughtjustyesterday—akingforhim,thebunkbedsBobbyhadinsistedon—tobedeliveredfirstthingthismorning.Susieorsomeoneshe’ddesignatedhadmadeacallandthestorehadbeenmorethanhappyto
cooperate.He’dhadtocallCarrieandNelltocancelthisweek’scookinglesson,butthisdeliveryhadtakenprecedence.Thetruckhadbeenwaitinginthedrivewaybyeighto’clockandthehastilypurchasedfurniturewasalreadyinplace.Susiehadmadeafewmore
callsandO’Brienshadofferedadditionalfurniturefromatticsandextrasetsof
dishestheysworeweren’tbeingused,butthatwouldhappenduringthisnextweek.Inthemeantime,heandBobbycouldputtheirclothesinthefreshlypaintedclosetsandsleepintheirownbeds.BobbywaselatedbythenewSpider-Mansheetsonhislowerbunkandthematchingnight-lightthathadalreadybeenpluggedin.Theonlythingmissing,
Samconcludedwithasigh,wasarefrigeratorstockedwithcoldbeer.Hecouldreallyuseoneaboutnowashefacedhisnewreality.“Knock,knock.”Thehesitant,musicalvoice
cutintohisthoughts.Ormaybeitwasthearomaoffreshlybakedcookiesthatcaughthisattentionfirst.Heturned,andtherewasCarrie,hercheeksnaturallyrosy
frombaking,herauburnhaircurlingaboutherface.ShewaswearingshortsandaChesapeakeShoresT-shirtandlookedalittletooapproachable.Hecouldsuddenlyenvisioncominghometohereverynightandfindingherinhiskitchenlookingjustlikethis,thearomaofoneofNell’sspecialtiestheyweremasteringwaftingfromthe
kitchen.“Hi,”hesaid,thengestured
aroundtheemptyspace.“I’dinviteyouin,but,asyoucansee,chairsareinshortsupply.”“That’sokay.I’mjust
droppingoffcookiestowelcomeyoutotheneighborhood.I’malittlestunnedbyhowquicklyyoupulledthisoff.”“Me,too,”headmitted.“I
hadn’teventhoughtaboutthismovemakingusneighbors.Youokaywiththat?”Carriefrowned.“Why
wouldn’tIbe?”“Wesortofagreedtokeep
ourdistance,right?ForBobby’ssake?”“We’lljusthavetoworka
littlehardertomakesurehedoesn’tgetthewrongidea,”shesaid.
Samwonderedwhatshe’dthinkoftheideashewasgettingrightnow.Wasitpossiblethatchocolate-chipcookieswereanaphrodisiac?Shelookedfarmoretemptingthanthatplateofcookies.Hesuddenlyrealizedshe
wasstudyinghimwithapuzzledlook.“Ifyou’rereallyworried,
youshouldknowthatIdon’tintendtomakeahabitofthis.
Ijustwantedtowelcomeyou.It’sagreatneighborhood.Ididn’tevenrealizethishousewasonthemarketorI’dhavementionedittoyoumyself.Thelocationcouldn’tbemoreconvenienttotownandthehouseisabsolutelycharming.”Samdidn’tknowwhat
qualifiedahouseascharming,butthisonedidfeelexactlyrightsomehow.It
evenhadaworkingfireplaceinthelivingroom,built-inbookshelvesandoneofthosewhitepicketfenceshe’dalwaysthoughttobetheworstsortofclichéforthekindofquaint,suburbanlifehedidn’tintendtolive.Howoftenhadheexpressedhisdisdainforsuchalifetohissister.Shemustbehavingagoodlaughatthewayshe’dturnedhislifeupsidedown.
HerealizedCarriewasagainstudyinghimintently.“Sorry,”heapologized.“IguessI’malittledistracted.”“Iknowyou’rejustsettling
inandmusthaveamillionthingstodo,soIwon’tbotheryou,butifthere’sanythingIcandotohelp,letmeknow,okay?”Sheglancedaroundattheemptyroomagain.“Howareyougoingtomanagewithoutfurniture?”
Hesmiled.“Wehavebeds.That’lldoforacoupleofnights.”“Whataboutdishes?Pots
andpan?”“Allinduetime,”hesaid.
“IgatherfromSusiethatshe’sbeenraidingvariousO’BrienatticsandwillbebringingincastoffsonMonday.Afterthat,I’llbeshoppingforwhateverelseweneed.”
“Well,then,IguessI’lltakeoff,”shesaidandstarteddownthesteps.Asshereachedthesidewalk,sheturnedback.“Idon’tsupposethetwoofyouwouldliketogotomygrandfather’sfordinnertomorrow,wouldyou?It’llbetheusualSundaymadhouse,butNell’scooking,soIcanpromiseyouadeliciousmeal,andit’llgiveBobbyachancetomake
somemorefriends.”Samhesitated.Givenwhat
she’dtoldhimabouthergrandfather’smatchmakingtendenciesandwhathe’dseenforhimselfwhenMickhadcomebythenewspaperoffice,maybethiswasn’tsuchahotidea.Carriewasskittishenoughandneitherofthemneededextrapressurethesedays.Hewasoverwhelmedbyallthe
suddenchangesinhislifestyleandshewassortingthroughamilliondetailstodecidewhethertoopenthatdaycare.Allveryvalidconsiderations,heconcluded.Intheend,though,hehad
tothinkaboutBobby.ItwouldbeawholeloteasierforhimtoadjusttoChesapeakeShoresifhewassurroundedbyevenmorekidshisage.Samwantedhim
tofeelasifhebelongedhere,ratherthanconstantlyhearingthathewantedtogobackhometoseehisrealfriends.“Areyousureit’llbeokay
ifyoubringacoupleoflast-minuteguests?”Shelaughedatthat.
“You’llsee.InthemobsceneatGrandpaMick’s,they’llbarelynoticetwomore.AndyoualreadyknowSusieandMack,plusmeandLuke,so
youwon’tfeelthatoutofplace.Andyou’vemetmygrandfatherandsurvived,soitshouldbeallgood.Nellwill,nodoubt,seizethechancetogiveusbothanothercookinglesson.She’scomplainedaboutusmissingthepastcoupleofSaturdays.”Samnodded.“Okay,then.
Thanksfortheinvitation.”“Wouldyouliketoride
overwithme?”sheasked.
“There’snoreasontotaketwocars,sincewe’reneighbors.”“Whydon’tIdrive?”he
suggestedinstead.“MycarhasBobby’sboosterseat.”“Sure.I’llwalkoverhere
justbeforefive.”Shegavehimawaveandtookoff.Samstoodinthedoorway
andwatchedhergo,enjoyingtheswayofherhipsinthoseshortsprobablyalittlemore
thanheshould.Bobbyslippedupbesidehimandtuckedahandinhis.“WasthatCarrie?”he
asked.“Itwas.”“Whywasshehereand
whydidn’tIgettoseeher?”“Shecametoinviteusto
Sundaydinnerwithherfamilytomorrow.”HeruffledBobby’shairandwavedtheplateofcookiesunderhis
nose.“Andshebroughtahousewarmingpresent.”“Cookies!”Bobbyguessed
atonce.“CanIhavesome?”“Justone,”Samsaid.
“Thenweneedtogotothegrocerystoretobuymilkandsomeothersupplies.”“Peanutbutterandjellyfor
schoollunches?”“Ifthat’swhatyouwant.”“Andcheeseandbreadto
makegrilledcheese
sandwichesforhere?”“Sure.”“Andpancakes?”WhenSamhesitated,
Bobbysaid,“Theymakefrozenones.Dowehaveatoaster?”“Notyet,butwewill,”
Samsaid,movingthattothetopofhismentallistofnecessities.“IfwedrivetothebigWalmartonthemainhighway,wecangetfoodand
atoaster.”“Allright!”Bobby
enthused,shovingthelastofhiscookieintohismouth.“Let’sgo.”Samcouldn’thelp
chuckling.Apparentlywhenproperlymotivated,BobbyforgotallabouthowmuchhemissedhomeandwasreadytoembraceChesapeakeShores.Allittookwasthepromiseofafewfamiliar
treats...andwarmcookiesfromaneighborwhowassneakingpastSam’sdefenses,too.
***
OnSunday,CarrieintroducedSamandBobbytoherrelatives,takinggreatcaretostressthathewasaneighborandnewtotown,thenaddinghisconnectiontoSusieand
Mack.Atleastthat’swhatshediduntiltheyreachedhergrandfather.“GrandpaMick,you
alreadyknowSamWinslow,”shesaid.“Iunderstandyoumethimatthenewspaperoffice.”Iftherewasatinyflicker
ofguiltinhergrandfather’seyes,itwashastilyreplacedbyasatisfiedgleam.ShehopedSamwasobliviousto
it.“Andwhowouldthisbe?”
Mickasked,reachingoutahandtoBobby.“Thisismynephew,
Bobby,”Samsaid.“IbelieveImentionedtoyouthathe’sjustcometolivewithme.Bobby,shakeMr.O’Brien’shand.”Bobbyhesitantlyreached
outforMick’shand,thenlookedsurprisedwhenhe
cameawaywithawrappedpieceofpennycandy.Carriechuckled.“Bobby,you’regoingto
findthatmygrandfatherhasanever-endingsupplyofcandyfromEthel’sEmporium.”Bobbygrinnedshyly.
“Cool.”HelookedupatSam.“CanIhaveitnow?”“Idon’tthinkonepiece
willspoilyourappetite,”Samsaid,thengavehimalookof
mockseverity.“Butjustone,understood?”“Youmaybetellingthatto
thewrongperson,”Carrietoldhim,noddingtowardhergrandfather.“Oh,stopyourfussing,”
Mickgrumbled.“Youenjoyedyourshareoftreatsfrommewhenyouwerehisage.Nowwhydon’tyouintroduceBobbytosomeoftheotherkids,whileSamand
Ihaveachat.”Carrieregardedher
grandfatherwithalarm,butknewbetterthantoargue.“Comeon,Bobby.Ithinkthere’sawholeslewofkidsplayingintheyard.Shallwelookforthem?”Bobbylookedhesitant,but
Samgavehisshoulderareassuringsqueeze.“I’llberighthere,”hepromised.Carrieheldoutherhand
andBobbyimmediatelytookit,thenfollowedheroutsidewhereahalfadozenO’Briengrandchildrenwereracingacrossthelawninanimprovisedgameofhide-and-seek.TheinstanttheyspottedCarrie,theystoppedandranover.“Carrie,areyougoingto
playwithus?”Seanasked,hisblueeyesregardingherhopefully.Seanwasthe
surpriseblessingwho’dcomeintoheruncleThomas’slifeafterheandtheyoungerConniehadmarried.“Notrightnow,butI’ve
broughtalongsomeonewhowouldlovetojoinyou,”Carrietoldhim.“ThisisBobby.”ShekneltdownandputherarmaroundBobby’swaist,thenpointedouteachofthechildren.“ThisisSean,andthat’sEmilyRose.You
alreadyknowDaveyandJohnny.Andthislittleguyhereismybrother,Patrick.Hedoesn’trunasfastastheothersyet,somaybeyoucanlookoutforhim.”Bobby’schestswelledjust
alittleatbeingaskedtobetheyoungerboy’sprotector.“Icandothat.”“Comeon,then,”Sean
encouraged.“Henry’sitandwe’resupposedtobehiding
fromhim.Icanshowyouthebestspots.”Bobbyglancedupather.
“Isitokay?”“Ofcourse.I’llbewaiting
foryourighthereontheporch.”SheloweredherselftothetopstepandwatchedasBobbyjoinedin,hesitantlyatfirst,andthenwiththeexuberanceofatypicalsix-year-old.“He’shavingfun.”
SheheardthesurpriseinSam’svoiceandglancedup.“Sometimesthechancetojustbeakidcanhelpwithallthegrown-upemotionsalittleboydoesn’tknowhowtohandle.”Samdroppeddownbeside
her.“I’vetriedsohardnottolethimseehowsadandscaredIam.”“I’msureyou’redoing
fine.”
“IwishIcouldbelievethat.”Heglancedsidewaysather,hiseyesshadowed.“It’sprettyoverwhelmingsometimes.Ican’tbelieveLaurelandRobertaregoneorthattheyleftBobbyinmycare.Whatweretheythinking?”“Thatyou’ddoagreatjob
withhim,”Carriesaid.“Youare,youknow.Despitealltheadjustmentsyou’rehavingto
make,you’remanaging.”Helookedstartled.“That’s
highpraisecomingfromyou.”“You’veearnedit.”She
noddedinthedirectionofthehouse.“How’ditgointhere?”Samturnedtofaceherand
grinned.“IhadtheoddestsensationthatonceagainIwasbeinginterrogatedaspotentialhusbandmaterial.
Youwouldn’tknowanythingaboutthat,wouldyou?”Carriecouldfeelablush
staininghercheeks.“GrandpaMickisaninveteratematchmaker.Iwarnedyouaboutthat.Paynoattentiontohim.”Henudgedherwithan
elbow.“Tellthetruth,Carrie.Didyouinvitemeheretodaytogivehimtheideathatwe’redating?”
Shesighed.“Maybe,justalittle.Hestoppedbythehousetheotherdayandgotonmycaseaboutfindingaman.ItoldhimIhadlotsofprospects,whenthetruthistherearenone.SinceIdidn’twanthimtodecidetofillthatparticularvoidinmylife,Idecidedtoinviteyouheretoday.AllthestuffaboutBobbymakingnewfriendswastrue,too.Itseemedlikea
win-win.”Shegavehimanimploringlook.“Canyouplayalong,justfortheafternoon?”Toherrelief,Samlooked
moreamusedthandistressed,“Gee,pretendtobeinterestedinabeautifulwomanforacoupleofhours?EspeciallywhenI’vehadnoluckuptillnowgettinghertogooutwithme?Hmm,Idon’tknow.”Heheldhergaze.
“That’saskingalot.”Shenudgedhimback.“Are
youuptothetask?”“Justhowseriousdoes
yourgrandfathergetabouthismatchmaking?Willhebebookingthechurchforaweddingnextweek?ShouldIavoidsigningthefinalpapersforthehousejustincaseIneedtomakeahastygetaway?”Carrielaughed.“IthinkI
canholdhimoffonthat.We’veallhadalotofexperienceatkeepingGrandpaMickfromgettingaheadofhimself.It’sjustthatit’seasiertoplayalongandlethimthinkthere’ssomeonespecialinourlives.I’mcatchingenoughgriefovermycareerchoicethesedays.Idon’tneedhimbuggingmeaboutmen,too.”“Howistheday-care
locationhuntcomingalong?Wehaven’thadmuchofachancetotalkaboutitsinceyoustartedlookingatproperty.”Carriebeamedathim.“Not
quiteascrazyfastasyourhousehunt,butIthinkI’vefoundtheperfectspotforitjustoffofMainStreet.Thekidswouldbeabletoplayonthetowngreeningoodweather.Ithasabigyard,
too.Julieandherdaughteraregoingtocomeovernextweekendtotakealook.Iftheythinkit’sasperfectasIdo,I’llputinanoffer.They’vepromisedtowalkmethroughanynecessaryrenovations.IhaveahunchonceIcangetmygrandfatherinvolvedinthatproject,he’llbackoffonhissearchfortheperfectmanforme.Thetruthisherevelsinbeinginvolved
inourlivesandaprojectlikethatwillbetotallyabsorbing,evenifit’sathousandtimessmallerthanwhatheusedtodowhenhedesignedandsupervisedthebuildingofwholetownsthewayhedidwithChesapeakeShores.”“Howlongarethose
renovationslikelytotake?”Saminquired.“Probablynotlongenough
tokeepussafefromhis
meddlingformorethanamonth.Braceyourself.”SherealizedSamwas
studyinghercuriously.“What?”sheasked.“I’msurprised,that’sall.
Notthatlongagoyouweremakingapro-conlistandnowyou’reobviouslyallin.”Shelaughed.“Iam,and
you’renotthefirsttocommentonmysuddenenthusiasm.Mywholefamily
seemstornbetweenreliefthatI’vefoundanewdirectionandshockthatit’ssomethinglikedaycare.”Sheshrugged.“WhatcanIsay?WorkingatJulie’splacehasreinforcedwhatIalreadyknewaboutmyself.”“Whichis?”“Ilovebeingaroundkids,
especiallylittleones.They’reendlesslycuriousandsweetlyinnocent.”
“Andyou’resurethisiswhatyouwanttodowithyourlife?NolingeringlongingtorunofftoEuropeorNewYork?”“I’mmoresureofthisthan
Ihavebeenaboutanythinginalongtime,”shesaidwithconfidence,thensmiledasPatrickwanderedoverandsnuggledagainsther.“Mylittlebrother,”shetoldSam.“Momgotalatestartona
secondfamily.We’reafamilythat’sjustfullofsurprises.”“Icanseethat,”Samsaid,
hiswarmgazefilledwithappreciation.“Whataboutyourfamily?”“There’sjustBobbyand
menow,”hesaid,griefonceagaindarkeninghiseyes.“Myfolksdiedacoupleofyearsago,justmonthsapart.Andyoualreadyknowabout
theaccidentthattookmysister.”“Noothersiblings?”Heshookhishead.“Ican’timaginegrowing
upwithoutahugefamily,”shesaid.“Iwassoluckytobepartofthisone.”Samgazedaroundatthe
children,who’dnowbeenjoinedbyseveraloftheadultsinanincreasinglyrambunctiousgameoftag.
Hisexpressionturnedwistful.“Icanunderstandthat.”Somethinginhisvoice,
though,suggestedotherwise.“Evenso,youfinditalittleoverwhelming,don’tyou?”Heshrugged.“Tobe
honest,yes.I’vealwaysbeenabitofaloner.Nowthatthere’sBobbytoconsider,I’mgoingtohavetochangemyways.Nomoreall-nightersforwork.Nomore
forgettingtoeatoreventobuygroceries.BobbyandIhitthestoretostockupyesterdayandtheamountoffoodinmygrocerycartwasprobablymorethanIboughtinsixmonthsinthepast.Imightevenhavetofigureouthowtousethewashingmachineand,heavenforbid,aniron.”Heshuddereddramatically.“Kidsdoneedfood,”she
said.“Andattention,andsleep,andaroutine.Itprobablydoesn’tmattersomuchiftheirclothesaren’tironed.”“AllstuffI’mnotvery
goodat,”Samsaid.“You’lllearn,”shesaid
confidently.“AndyoualreadyhavetheonethingBobbyneedsthemostrightnow.”“What’sthat?”
“Youlovehim.”Shecouldseeitinhiseyes
ashewatchedhisnephew.Sammightbeterrifiedatbeingthrustintothisnewroleofbeingresponsibleforanotherperson,buthelovedthatlittleboy.Seeingthatmadeherfalljustalittlebitinlovewithbothofthem.Andthatdefinitelywasn’tmeanttobepartoftoday’shastilydevisedschemetogether
grandfatheroffherback.
***
SamwassurprisinglycontentsittingontheporchstepnexttoCarrieaskidsracedaroundtheyard,shoutingexuberantly.Whileitwasafarcryfromthequiet,carefreeexistencehe’dliveduptillnow,therewassomethingalluringaboutthe
friendlycompetitivenessandthelaughterthatechoedthroughtheair.“IthoughtI’dheardthat
thetwoofyouwereouthere,”avoicesaidfromabovethem.Samlookedaroundtosee
Nellontheporch,handsonherhips.Despitethescoldingnoteinhervoice,therewasatwinkleinhereyes.“Hi,Gram,”Carriesaid,
flushing.“Didyouneedsomething?”“Ineedalittlehelpfrom
twopeoplewhomissedtheircookinglessonagainyesterdaywithabunchofflimsyexcuses.Iimagineyoucouldbothusesomeexperiencewithgettingpotroastforthiscrowdontothetable.”Samreadilyjumpedtohis
feet.“Whatcanwedoto
help?”“Comewithme,”Nell
commanded.WhenCarriestayedput,shefrowned.“You,too.”“Somebodyneedstokeep
aneyeonBobby,”Carrieprotested.“Thereareatleastten
responsibleadultsintheyard,”Nellcountered.“IncludingKevin.Tellyouruncletokeepaneyeon
Bobbyalongwithhisownkids.”“Yes,ma’am,”Carriesaid
dutifully.InthemeantimeSam
followedNellintothekitchen.Shealreadyhadthebulkofthemealwellunderway,butsheassignedhimthetaskofmakinggravy.“ButI’venevermade
gravyinmylife,”Samprotested.
Nellchuckled.“ExactlywhyI’mheretoteachyou,youngman.”“Oh,gravy!”Carriesaid
whenshejoinedthem.“Gram’sgravyisthebest.”“Itmightbewisetoavoid
ittoday,”Samsaid,agrimexpressiononhisfaceashestirredwhatlookedtohimlikeaglutinousmess.Nellglancedoverhis
shoulder.“Didyoumeasure
thecornstarchorjustdumpinhalfthebox?”“Itdidn’tlookasifitwas
thickeningatfirst,”Samadmitted.“SoIaddedalittlemore.”“Cookingislikealotof
thingsinlife.Itcan’tberushed,”Nelladmonished.“Itrequirespatience.”“Somethinginshortsupply
inthisfamily,”Carriecommented.
“Unfortunatelytrue,”Gramreplied.“Let’sseeifyou’reanybetteratthisthanhewas.”Shegesturedtoward
anotherpanofdrippingsfromtheroast,thencoachedherthroughthestepsandingredientsneededtomakehersmooth,richgravy.“Better,”shesaid
approvingly.“Yougetalittleredstar.”
“Notgold?”Carrieasked.“Isitperfect?”Nellasked.“No,”Carrieadmittedwith
achagrinedexpression.“Thenyoudon’tgetgold,
doyou?”“HowaboutSam?”Carrie
asked,provingthatcompetitivenessexistedeverywherewithO’Briens.“Hegetstodoitagainat
myhousenextSaturdaytillhegetsitright.I’dmakehim
tryagainrightnow,butweneedtogetthisfoodonthetable.Startdishingitup,Carrie.Sam,youcanputitonthedining-roomtable.”“Isshealwaysthisbossy?”
heaskedinanundertonethathemeanttobeoverheard.Carrielaughed.“Even
GrandpaMickandhisbrotherscowerwhenshespeaks,”shesaid.“NowthatI’dliketosee,”
Samsaid.“Stickaround,”Nelltold
him,smiling.“Mysonsusuallygivemesomereasonoranothertotakethemtotaskbeforethedayisout.”SomehowSamfoundthe
thoughtofthiswonderful,diminutivewomanbeingabletohandletheall-powerfulMickO’Brienveryreassuring.Maybehecouldfollowherexampleandlearn
toholdhisownwithMick—andevenCarrie—whenhehadto.
***
“Haveyouwatchedher?”SusiewassayingtoJessjustasCarriewasabouttowalkontotheporchafterlunch.Hercousin’svoicecarriedinsideandsomethingmadeCarriecometoastoplong
enoughtolisten.“Thewayshe’slatchedon
toSamissoobvious.Allthistalkaboutopeningadaycaredoesn’tmeanathing,”Susiecontinued.“Whatshe’sreallyinterestedinisfindingamanandaready-madefamily.”Carrieknewtherewaslittle
questionthatSusiewastalkingabouther.ShewaitedforherauntJess’sresponse.“I’mnotseeingthat,”Jess
respondedquietly.“Sure,Carrie’sbeenpitchingintohelpout,butanyoneinthisfamilywoulddothesame.You’vecertainlydoneyoursharetogetSamandBobbyintoanewhousewithaminimumoffuss.Andyou’vebeenscouringatticsforfurnituretheycoulduse.Doesthatmeanyou’reafterSam?”“Ofcoursenot,”Susie
said.“That’sentirely
different.”“How?”“I’mjusthelping.Carrie
obviouslyhasanulteriormotive.”Carriefrozeinplaceatthe
horribleaccusation.BeforeshecouldworkupafullheadofsteamandconfrontSusieherself,Jessdiditforher.“That’saprettyterrible
thingtoaccuseyourcousinofdoing,”Jesssaid.“SinceI
knowyou’renotinterestedinSamyourselfbecauseyou’rehappilymarriedtoMack,somethingtellsmethisisreallyaboutBobby.AmIright?Didyouwanttobetheonewhohelpedthatlittleboyadapttobeinginanewtown?”Silencefell,andfora
moment,CarriethoughtSusiemightnotanswer.“Maybe,”shefinally
admittedinasmallvoice.SheregardedJessmiserably.“It’ssoobviousthatSam’snotqualifiedtobeanyone’sfather.EvenCarriesawthatforherself.Heleftthatchildinacarallalone,foronething.Whoknowshowmanymistakeshe’sgoingtomakeandwhatcouldhappentoBobbybecauseSam’ssocareless?AndCarrie,ofallpeople,isgoingtojumpin
andsavetheday?Oneminuteshe’slivingitupinEurope.Thenextshe’sopeningadaycare.Comeon.Whatdoesthattellyouaboutherstability?”Carriefeltasifshe’dbeen
slapped.Ratherthangoingoutsidetodefendherself,shewhirledaroundtogothroughthehouseandleaveforhome.“Don’tyoudarerun
away,”hermothersaid
gently,standinginherpath.She’dobviouslyoverheardmostofSusie’sremarks,aswell.“Youknowshe’swrong.Susieisjustupsetwithherownsituation.She’slashingoutatanyoneandeveryonerightnow.ThesituationwithSamandBobbyhasstirredupallthoseunrequitedmaternalinstinctsshehasandshe’smadeyoutheenemy.”
“Igetthat,”Carrieconceded.“Butnooneinthisfamilyhaseversaidsuchspitefulthingsaboutmeoranyoneelsebefore.”Sheregardedhermomwithrealdismaytwistinginhergut.“Youdon’tthinkI’mthatfrivolous,doyou?Andyoudon’tthinkI’mtryingtolatchontoSam,justsoIcanhaveafamily?Iwouldneverdothat.Ifanything,I’vebeen
ignoringthesparkofattractionbetweenusbecauseIdon’tthinkitwouldbesmarttostartsomethingupwithSamwhenthere’sascaredlittleboyinthemixwhocouldgethurt.”“Tryreservingsomeofthat
compassionforSusie,”hermothersaid.“She’shurtingrightnow.Shedoesn’tknowwhatshe’ssaying.Trytorememberhowmuchpainshe
mustbeintofeeltheneedtoattackyou.Don’tthinkI’msuggestingforaminutethatshedoesn’toweyouanapology,butconsiderthecircumstancesandtrytocutheralittleslack.Onceshehasherfeetbackunderher,she’llseehowwrongshe’sbeen.”“Well,it’sprettyunlikely
that’sgoingtohappentoday.Ishouldleavebeforeweget
intoitandruinthedayforeveryone.”“Didn’tyourideoverwith
Sam?”“Yes,butyoucantellhim
somethingcameupandIhadtoleave.Icanwalkhome.”Shegavehermomapleadinglook.“Please.”Abbylookedasifshe
didn’tagree,buteventuallyshenodded.“I’lltellhim.”ShegaveCarrieafiercehug.
“Trytoputthiswholeincidentoutofyourheadandpleasedon’tletitspoilallofyourexcitementaboutopeningaday-carecenter.”“I’lltry,”shepromised.ButSusie’scruel
comments,nomatterthepainthatwasunderlyingthem,weren’tsomethingshewaslikelytobeabletogetoutofherheadanytimesoon.
15
“I’mworriedaboutSusie,”MackconfidedtoJakeandWill,histwobestfriends.ItwasafterSundaydinneratMick’sandthethreelifelongfriends—allofthemmarriedtoO’Briens—hadretreatedtotheAdirondackchairs
overlookingthebay,wheretheyhadsomeprivacyamidtheraucousgamesbeingplayedbytheyoungergeneration.“Whyisthat?”Willasked.
Apsychologist,hehadinsightstheyallreliedonfromtimetotime.AsthehusbandofMick’syoungestdaughter,Jess,theowneroftheInnatEaglePoint,Willunderstoodthefamily
dynamicsaswellasanyofthem.“Thewholeadoption
processistakingalotlongerthaneitherofusimagined,”Macksaid,hisownfrustrationevident.AroundSusie,hedidhisbesttobeupbeatandencouraging,butthesituationwasgettingtohim,too.“Havingthisprivateadoptionfallthroughatthelastminutewasdevastating
forher.Susieinsistsshe’sthroughtrying,butIcanseethelonginginhereyeseverytimewe’rearoundtheotherkidsinthefamily.Shealmostbalkedatcomingtoday.WhenIaskedwhy,shecameupwithsomelameexcuse,butIknowit’sbecauseshewantsherownbabysobadly.IgotherherebywarningherthatNellwouldstartaskingquestionsifshemissed
anotherSundaydinner.”“Still,Icanunderstandher
desiretoavoidthesefamilymeals,”Willsaid.“Everywheresheturns,there’seitheranewbabyoroneontheway.That’sboundtohurt.”“Exactly,”Macksaid.“It’s
killingher.It’sturningherintosomeoneIhardlyrecognizeanymore.”“Bree’sworriedabouther,
too,”Jakeadmitted.“SusiewascomingaroundthehouseprettyregularlytospendtimewithEmilyRose,butshesuddenlystopped.Breecan’tdecidewhethertotalktoheraboutitortoletitgo.AndshementionedthatSusie’sbeenavoidingthewomeninthefamilywhogatheratthecaféinthemornings,too.Soundsasifshe’swithdrawingfromeveryone.”
“Noteveryone,”Abbysaid,pullingupanotherchairandjoiningthem.“Sorryforeavesdropping,butMack,Iwaslookingforyou.”“Anyparticularreason?”
Mackasked.“Didyouneedtospeakto
himalone?”Willasked,obviouslysensingAbby’smood.EvenMack,whocouldbeprettyoblivioustosuchthings,couldtellshewasn’t
happy.“Actually,youshould
probablyallhearthis.Will,youmighthavesomeideasabouthowtohandlethesituation,”Abbysaid.Mackregardedherwarily.
“ThisisaboutSusie?”heconcluded.Shenodded.“Iwascoming
outofthehousejustnowandoverheardhertalkingtoJessaboutSam,Bobbyand
Carrie.”Mackcouldguessfrom
Abby’sprotectiveexpressionwhatthegistoftheconversationhadbeen.Heknewbecausehe’dheardthesameorsimilarcomments.“ShethinksCarrie’smakingamoveonSambecauseofBobbyandthatSam’scompletelylackinginparentingskills.”Abbygavehimastartled
look.“Prettymuch.She’ssaidthesametoyou?”Macknodded.“Sheknows
she’swrong,butshecan’tseemtohelpherself.It’sthiswholeadoptionfiasco.She’snotthinkingstraight.Forsomereasonshe’sseizedonBobbylikesomesortoflifeline,achildwhomightneedher.”“Well,Idon’tknowhow
oftenshe’sbeentalkinglike
thisortowhom,”Abbysaid,“butthistimenotonlydidIoverhearher,sodidCarrie.”“Blastit!”Macksaid
heatedly.“Iamsosorry,Abby.Didtheygetintoit?”“No,Carriewalkedaway.I
don’tknowifSusieevenrealizedshewasthere.I’mafraidmydaughtermightnotbequitesoforgivingnexttime.Shewashurtandangry,butshewastryingveryhard
toputherselfintoSusie’sposition.”SheleveledalookatMack.“Thelastthingwewantisanopenfeudbetweenthosetwowitheveryoneinthefamilytakingsides.”“Ofcoursenot,”Mack
agreed,thenturnedtoWill.“HowamIsupposedtofixthis?”“Talktoher,”Willsaid.
“Gethertoopenuptoyou.”“Doyouthinkit’sthat
freakingeasy?”Mackretorted.“Shewon’ttalkaboutit.IfIbringuptheadoption,shesnapsmyheadoff.Igetit.Ireallydo,butit’stakingatoll.IsweartherearedayswhenIthinkdealingwiththecancerwaseasierthanthis.Atleastweknewwhatwehadtodothen.Andwestucktogether.Neitherofusknowshowtofixthisandit’sevidenttomethatshe
thinksshe’sfacingitallalone.”Willregardedhim
thoughtfully.“Inoticedsomethingtodaythatfitswhatbothofyouaresaying.WhenSusiewaswatchingCarriewithSamandBobby,shelookedalmostangry,asifCarriehadstolensomethingfromher.”Macksighedheavily.“I
know.It’sjustasIfeared
whenItookherovertotheinntomeetBobby.Ithinkshegotthiscrazyideaofjumpingintosavethispoormotherlesslittleboy.ExceptnowCarrie’sobviouslybeathertoit.”“Ifshewon’topenupto
you,doyouthinkshe’dtalktosomeoneelse?”Abbyaskedgently.Mackfrowned.“Youmean
aprofessional?”
Abbynodded,thengavehishandasympatheticsqueeze.“Look,I’mgoingtoletyouhandlethis.Mebuttinginbeyondalertingyoutotheproblemwon’thelp.Imaybeopen-mindedandrationalaboutalotofthings,butwhenitcomestomykids,I’mgoingtostandupforthem,nomatterwhogetshurtintheprocess.IknowSusiedoesn’tneedme
comingdownonher.Ifthere’sanythingIcando,though,letmeknow.IknowhowhardthisisandIfeelforSusie.Ireallydo.I’llleaveyoualltofigureoutyournextstep.”Aftershewent,Mack
sighed.“Thisreallydoessuck,”
Jakesaid.“Itdoesn’tsoundlikethereareanyeasyanswers.”
“CertainlynoneSusie’sgoingtobehappyabout,”Mackagreed.“Shedoesn’tlikeaskingforhelp,evenwhensherecognizeshowdesperatelyshemightneedit.Ontopofthat,she’sprettyprivate.Ican’tseehertalkingtoastranger.”“Whataboutme?”Will
asked.“We’vealwaysbeenclose.Sheusedtoopenuptomeaboutherfeelingsforyou,
Mack.Atleastshedidbackintheday.I’dbehappytospendsometimewithher,thoughsomebodycompletelyimpartialwithnoconnectiontotheO’Briensatallmightbebetter.”Itwastheobviousnext
step,butMackthoughtheknewhowhiswifewouldreact.She’dthinkhewassidingwiththeenemyinsomeway.“Icansuggestit,”
hesaid,resignedtoamessyconfrontation.“Somethingtellsme,though,thatitwon’tgooverwell.I’mafraidit’sgoingtodriveanotherwedgebetweenus.”“Try,”Willencouraged
him.“It’simportant,especiallyifyouthinkherfeelingscouldcausearealriftbetweenherandCarrie.Abby’sright.Thatwouldhaveeverybodyinthefamily
takingsides.O’Briensareusedtostickingtogether.I’mnotsurehowwellthey’dhandlesomethingthat’sboundtodividethem,especiallywhenitcomestosomethinglikethis.Andwesuredon’twanttoseeSamandthatinnocentnephewofhiscaughtupinsomemessyfamilydispute.”“Believeme,Igetit,”
Macksaid.“Noneofuswants
that.KeepinmindthatSamworksforme.He’sadecentguywho’sdoingthebesthecaninanalreadytoughsituation.”Heshookhisheadwearily.“Atthesametime,Iwantmywifetobehappyandtohaveeverythingsheneeds.”Willregardedhimwith
compassion.“Ifwhatsheneedsisachildrighthereandnow,youmighthaveto
acceptthisoneisbeyondyourcontrol.”“Couldyou,ifJesswere
thisupset?”Willleveledalookathim,
thensmiledruefully.“Ofcoursenot.I’mjustsayingthatnoneofusmeremortals,noteventheall-powerfulMick,canmakedreamscometrueoncommandeverysingletime.”“ButMickcertainlyhas
beentherolemodelfortrying,”Macksaid.Theothertwonodded.“Oh,yeah,”Jakesaid.ThetruthwasthatMick
O’Brienhadsetthebarimpossiblyhighforallofthem.Andthewomenintheirliveswereusedtosuccess,notfailure.
***
WhileAbbyhadofferedatotallyplausibleexplanationforCarrie’sabruptdeparturefromhergrandfather’s—thatshehadpaperworkforthedaycaredueinthemorning—Samcouldn’tshakethefeelingthattherewasalotmoretoit.EventhoughhebarelyknewCarrie’smother,hethoughthe’ddetectedarealhintofworryinhereyes.Ashemadetheturnonto
WillowBrookRoad,hedroveslowlybythehousehe’ddeterminedwasCarrie’s.Hesawnosignsoflife,notalightoninside,nomovement.Ofcourseshecouldbe
takinganapormaybeshewasn’tevenhome,buthewasstruckonceagainbythesensethatsomethingwasn’tright.Heparkedinhisown
driveway,hesitatedjustlong
enoughtodrawapuzzledlookfromBobby,thensaid,“Howabouttakingawalkbeforewegoinside?”“Howcome?”Bobby
asked.“Ithoughtwemightstop
bytoseeCarrie.”Bobby’seyesbrightenedat
once.“Okay.Maybeshe’llhavemorecookies.”Samlaughed.“Didn’tyou
getenoughtoeattoday?”
“Sure,butcookiesarealwaysgood.Ortheycouldgointomybackpackforschooltomorrow.”“Aninterestinglineof
thought,”Samagreed.“Butyoudon’taskforcookies.Youcanacceptthemifsheoffersyousome,okay?”Bobbyshrugged.
“Whatever.”Carrie’shousestillseemed
uncommonlyquiettoSamas
heandBobbyapproached,thenrangthebell.Heheardnosoundscomingfrominside,soherangthebellagain.Thenhedecidedtowalkaroundback.That’swherehefound
Carrieatthefaredgeoftheproperty,herfeetdanglingintoWillowBrook,tearsonhercheeks.Sheswipedatthemimpatientlywhensherealizedshehadcompany.
Bobbyinstantlytooknoteofthetearsandsatdownclosetoher.“Areyousad?”“Alittle,”sheadmittedas
hesnuggledcloser.“I’msorry.”“Havingyouheremakes
mefeelawholelotbetter,”shetoldhim,drapinganarmoverhisshoulders.“Areyousure?”Sam
asked,studyingherintently.“Wedon’thavetostick
aroundifyou’dratherbealone.Iwasjustworriedthatsomethinghadhappenedatyourgrandfather’s.”“NothingIcan’tfigure
out,”shesaid,thoughshedidn’tsoundconvincing.“Wanttotalkaboutit?”he
asked,despitehislackofexperienceinsolvingthesortofproblemsthatbroughtontears.Hecouldhandlecomputercrashesorinternet
providerglitchesrightatthenewspaper’sdeadlinewithoutbattinganeye,butthissensitivitybusinesswasnewterritory.“IfIdo,itwillonly
convinceyouthatyou’vegottentangledupinaverymessyfamilydynamicthatitwouldtakeSolomontosortout.Sinceyou’rejustsettlingintoChesapeakeShores,itmightbebettertoletyou
keepyourillusionsaboutmyfamilyalittlelonger.”Hegaveheralonglook.“I
haven’tsignedthefinalpapersonthehouse.I’mnotstuckhereyet.”Shetriedforasmile,butit
wobbledandfailed.“That’stheproblem,isn’tit?IfIstartblabbingandblubbering,youcouldtakeofffasterthanoneofthoserocketstheyfirefromWallopsIslandtoget
suppliestotheInternationalSpaceStation.”“I’dliketothinkI’ma
littletougherthanthat.”Hesatonherothersideandstretchedouthislegs,thenreachedoverandbrushedawaythedampnessthatlingeredonhercheek.“Seriously—you’vestoodbymeinsometoughspotsthepastfewweeks.I’dliketoreturnthefavorifIcan.”
“Maybeacookieandsomemilkwouldhelp,”Bobbysuggestedhopefully.“Thatalwaysmakesmefeelbetter.”Overthetopofhishead,
SamcaughtCarrie’sgazeandheldit.“Orwecantakeoff.”Shetriedanothersmileand
thisoneheld.“Ithinkcookiesandmilksoundlikethebestideaever,”shesaid,gettingtoherfeetandleadingthewayinside.
Sheflippedonthekitchenlightstorevealasmallspace,butonethatwouldhavebeenagourmetchef’sdreamwithitsgranitecountertops,stainlesssteelappliancesandadoorthatopenedintoawalk-inpantrystockedwitheveryconceivablesnack,healthyandotherwise.Bobbystoodinthedoorway,clearlymesmerized.“It’sbetterthanthegrocery
store,”hesaid,aweinhisvoice.Carrielaughed.“Iliketo
bepreparedwhenthekidscomeover,”shetoldSam,herexpressionchagrined.“ItoldyouIlikebeingthego-toaunt.”“Well,IcanseeI’mgoing
tohavedifficultygettingBobbybacktoourhouseeveragain,”Samsaid.“Infact,Imightwantyoutoadoptme,
too.”Thecolorwashedoutof
hercheeksathiswordsandshequicklyturnedaway.Samwalkedaroundtofaceher.“WhatdidIsay?”“Nothing.Honestly,”she
claimed,thoughshewouldn’tlookhimintheeye.“Ifyoucouldgetthreeglassesfromthecabinetabovethesink,I’llgetthemilkandthecookiejar.”
Behindthem,Bobbywasdoinganinventoryofthepantry.“TherearethosefruitythingsIlove,andchips,andOreocookies,andpeanut-buttercrackersandpretzelsandapplesandbananasandlotsandlotsofcerealand—”“Enough,”Samsaid,
chuckling.“I’msureCarrieiswellawareofwhat’sinthere.Stopbeingnosy.”
“Butthedoorwasopen,”Bobbyprotested.Oncethemilkwaspoured
andthecookiesplacedonaplate,CarriefocusedherattentiononBobby.“Didyouhavefuntoday?”Henodded,hismouth
alreadyfullofcrumblingchocolate-chipcookie.ShefinallyturnedtoSam.
“Andyou?”“Itwasarevelation.”
“Itseemedasifyou’dlostthatglazed-over,overwhelmedexpressionbytheendofdinner,”sheobserved.“Prettymuch.Itwas
fascinatingwatchingtheebbandflowaspeoplemovedfromoneconversationandonegrouptoanother.”“Sortoflikewitnessinga
socialexperimentinperson,”shesuggested.
“Notatall.It’sevidentthatO’Briensloveandrespecteachother.Ifoundthatprettyimpressive.”“Oh,believeme,wehave
ourshareofsquabbles,”shesaid,anoddnoteinhervoice.“Insomewaysthey’reworsewhentheyhappen,becausetheexpectationisthatwe’llallgetalongallthetime.”“Personalexperience?”Ratherthananswering
directly,shetoldthestoryofthewarfareamonghergrandfatherandhisbrotherswhenthetownwasbeingbuilt.“UncleThomastookGrandpaMicktocourtbecausehedidn’tthinkhewasworkinghardenoughtoprotectthebay.UncleJeffsidedwithThomasandwarwasdeclared.ItwasGramwhobrokeredpeace,mostlybyinsistingthattheSunday-
dinnertraditionwouldnotbebrokenandthattheyhadtogetoverthemselves.”“Andjustlikethat,they
did?”Carrielaughed.“Hardly.It
tookyears.AccordingtoMom,Sundaydinnersweresometimesverytenseifanyoneventuredontoadangeroustopic.OfcoursebythetimeCaitlynandIcamealong,ChesapeakeShores
hadbeenbuiltandpeaceonceagainreigned,atleastmostofthetime.”“Well,Icertainlydidn’t
noticeanystraintoday,”Samsaid.Again,though,hehadthe
sensethatCarriewantedtodisputethat,butsheremaineddiscreetlysilent.“Weshouldgo,”hesaid
eventually.“Thanksforaskingustojoinyoutoday.”
“I’msorryIbailedonyou.IhopeMomexplained.”“Shedid,”Samsaid,
thoughwithnomountainofpaperworkinsight,hewaswellawarehestilldidn’thavethewholepicture.GivenCarrie’sreticencejustnow,hewonderedifheeverwould.Orwhyhehadagut
feelingthatitmattered.
***
“BookclubisonagainfortomorrownightatSusie’s,”ShannaannouncedhappilyonMondaymorning.“Ithoughtshe’dagreedthe
otherdaywhenyoufirstspoketoheraboutit,thencanceledanhourlater.”Heathersaid,lookingsurprised.“Whatmakesyouthinkshewon’tcancel
again?”“Ipinnedherdown
yesterdayatMick’sandbadgeredhertillshecouldn’tsayno,”Shannasaid,clearlypleasedwithherself.“You’llallbethere,right?Andyou’llbringsomething.Ipromisedhershewouldn’thavetoliftafinger.”HeatherandBree
immediatelyofferedtoshopforsandwichwrapsand
saladsfromPaniniBistro.“AndI’llbakebrownies,”
Shannasaid.“AndI’llaskJesstobringanotherdessertfromtheinn.Whataboutyou,Carrie?”“Ican’tmakeit,”Carrie
saidstiffly.“I’mswampedwithpaperworkfortheday-carecenter.”Breestudiedherwitha
narrowedgaze.“Andthat’smoreimportantthanbeing
thereforSusie?”“Actuallyitis,”Carriesaid
defensively.“Ihavetogettheballrolling,andConnorneedsthispaperworktofilealltheapplications.”“Surelyonenightwon’t
makethatbigadifference,”Shannasaid.“Sorry.Notthistime,”
Carrierepeated.Breegaveherapenetrating
look,thensighed.“Soit’s
true.”Theotherwomenstaredat
hercuriously,evenasCarriewantedtojumpupandleavebeforeherauntopenedthiscanofworms.“What’strue?”Heather
asked.“There’ssomesortofrift
betweenCarrieandSusie,”Breesaid,hergazeonCarrie.“AmIright?”“Noideawhatyou’re
talkingabout,”Carriesaid.“AndIhavetorun.IneedtopickupJackson.”“Sitstill.Youdon’thave
JacksononMonday,”Breesaid.“Changeofplans,”Carrie
said,tryingtokeepanoteofdesperationoutofhervoice.“Noahaskedmetofillin.That’swhyI’mnotvolunteeringatJulie’sday-carecentertoday.”Shegave
Breeachallenginglook.“Wouldyouliketocallhimtocheck?”Breerelented.“Thatwon’t
benecessary,”shesaideventually.“Butsweetie,ifthereissomethinggoingonbetweenyouandSusie,youneedtomendfences.Thatmakesitevenmoreimportantforyoutobethereforbookclub.”“It’suptome?Why?”
Carriesnappedbeforeshecouldstopherself.Shefoughttobringherannoyanceundercontrol.“Youhavenoideawhatyou’retalkingaboutandIreallythinkyoushouldstayoutofit.”Shestoodupandthistime
noonemadeanyefforttostopher.Shewashalfwayoutthedoorbeforesheheardthemurmurofvoicesstartagainandknewthatheated
speculationwasunderway.Thiswholethingwas
destinedtoturnintoahugedisasterbeforeallwassaidanddoneandshecouldn’tthinkofanywaytostopit.HowwasshesupposedtodefendherselfagainstSusie’sirrationalsuspicionsandcruelcommentswithoutmakingmattersevenworse?TalkingtohercousininSusie’spresentframeofmindwould
onlyescalatethesituation.Ofcourse,walkingoutof
Sally’sjustnowprobablyhadn’thelped,either.WhateverherauntBreekneworthoughtsheknewwasgoingtobecommonknowledgebeforenoon.Andthenwhat?Battlelineswouldbedrawn?NotonlydidCarrienotwantthat,butinSusie’sfragilestatethesedays,itwasthelastthingshe
needed,aswell.
***
SamhadgottenBobbyofftoschoolandwashavingasecondcupofcoffeetobracehimselfforabusydayatthenewspaper,whenheheardacarpullupoutside.Heglancedoutthelivingroomwindowandsawinsteadapickuploadedwithfurniture.
Susiewasjustgettingoutofthecabofthetruck.Samopenedthefrontdoor.
“Whereonearthdidyoufindallofthatstuff?”Shelaughed.“Imadethe
roundsafterdinneryesterdayandraidedattics.”AsSamapproachedthe
truckhespottedwhatlookedtobesomedecentantiquesandalike-newsofa.“That’swhatO’Briensstoreintheir
attics?”“Thewomeninthefamily
liketoredecorateonaregularbasis,”Susiesaidwithashrug.“It’sacurse.Heavenforbidaperfectlygoodsofaclasheswiththenewpaintcolor.”“Yes,heavenforbid!”Sam
replied,astonished.“Look,IreallyappreciatethismorethanIcansay,butIdon’tthinkyouandIcangetitinto
thehouseonourown.AndIneedtogettotheofficeforanearlymeetingwithyourhusband.”“Don’tfret.He’sonhis
way,alongwithotherreinforcements.Allyouneedtodoisdecidewhereyouwantthingsandpointthemintherightdirection.”Sureenough,severalcars
pulledintospacesalongthestreetandmenhe’dmetjust
yesterday,plusMackandKevinandevenMick,piledoutofthem.Forthenexttwentyminutesorso,allhedidwasdirecttraffictovariousrooms.“Idon’tknowwhatto
say,”hetoldthemwhenthefurnitureandboxesofpotsandpansanddisheshadbeenunloaded.“Thisiswayaboveandbeyond.”“Allthingsthatshouldbe
puttogooduse,”Micksaid.“Nowallyouneedisawoman’stouchandyou’llhaveyourselfaverynicehome.”“WhichisexactlywhyI’m
goingtostickaroundandputthingsintheirproperplaces,”Susiesaidbrightly.“PlusIhaveafewmorelittlethingsinthetruckthatwillbrightenthingsup.”“Susie,you’vealready
donemorethanenough,”Samsaid.“Roundingallofthisupandgettingthepaperworkinordersoquickly—you’vebeenarealgodsend.”“Absolutely,”Micksaid.
“YoujustleavetherestofthistoCarrie.Shehasagoodeyefordetails.”Samcouldn’treadthe
expressionthatwashedoverSusie’sface,butMackwasat
hersideinaninstant.“Sam’sright,sweetheart.Whatyou’vedonehereisamazing,butlethimfigureouttherest.I’msureBobbywillwanttohaveasay,too.”“Youcanbetonthat,”Sam
said.“Ipickedupafewtoysfor
him,”Susiesaidstiffly.“CanIatleastleavethose?”“Ofcourse,”Macksaid
quickly.“Aretheyinthecab
ofthetruck?I’llgetthem.”Astheothermenwaved
goodbyeandheadedout,SusiestoodbesideSam,hershouldershunched,herfacedowncast.Samcouldtellshewasupset,butfiguringoutexactlywhywasbeyondhim.“Ireallydoappreciate
everythingyou’vedone,”hetoldheragain.“Thissituationcouldhavebeensomuchharderandyou’vemadeit
painless.”“Ijustwantedtohelpany
wayIcould,”shesaid,liftingherchinuntiltheirgazescaught.Somethinginhertoneleft
Sampuzzled.“Iknowthat.”Hadsomeonesuggestedotherwise?Beforehecouldask,MackwasbackwithbagsoftoysforBobby.Samcouldonlystare.“Wow!Didyoubuyout
thestore?”Shegavehimasheepish
grin.“Imighthavegottenalittlecarriedaway.OnceIgotstarted,Iwashavingsomuchfun,Icouldn’tseemtostop.Pleasedon’taskmetotakethemback.”Samhadbeenabouttodo
justthat,butatasubtleshakeofMack’shead,hesaidonly,“IwasgoingtosuggestthatIputthemintoaclosetandthat
youcomebacklaterandgivethemtoBobbyyourself.Youdeservetherewardofseeinghisfacelightupwhenheseeseverything.”AtthatSusie’sexpression
finallybrightened.“Youwouldn’tmind?”“Notatall.I’mplanningto
getbackfromworkintimetobeherewhenBobbygetshomefromschool.Doyouwanttostopbyaroundfour?
Mack,you,too?”“Sure,”Macksaidawfully
quickly.“Wewouldn’tmissit,wouldwe,Suze?”“We’llseeyouatfour,”
Susiepromised.“Well,I’llseeyouatthe
officealotsoonerthanthat,”Macksaid.“Onmyway,”Sam
promisedandwatchedthetwoofthemleave.Hestillhadthesensethat
despitethegenerositybehindeverythingthathadhappenedherethismorning,therewasanundertoneofsomethinghewasmissing.Andwhateveritwas,itseemedtohaveleftalotofpeopleonedge.
16
CarriewastakingJacksonforawalkinhisstrollerMondayafternoonwhenshespottedMackandSusiepullingintoSam’sdriveway.ShewasabouttomakeaU-turnandgobackhome,whenBobbyspottedherandcame
runningacrossthelawn,shoutinghername.Susie’sheadsnappedaround,MackwincedandCarriewishedthegroundwouldopenupandswallowher.“Stopit!”shemuttered
underherbreath.Afterall,thiswasherneighborhood.Shehadaperfectrighttotakeawalkonthisstreet.Plasteringasmileonherface,shecalledoutagreetingto
Bobby.“There’sasurpriseforme
atthehouse,”Bobbytoldherexcitedlywhenhereachedher.“Samwon’ttell,butI’mgonnafindoutinaminute.Youwannasee?MaybeJacksonwouldlikeit,too.”SheglancedinSam’s
directionforguidanceandhenodded.“Absolutely,”shetoldBobby.“Let’sseewhatthisamazingsurprisemight
be.”Onherwaytothehouse,
shemanagedacivilizedgreetingforhercousinandMack,butshecouldtellbythelookinSusie’seyesthatshewasunhappywiththeadditiontothecelebration,whateveritwas.Onanyotherday,maybeCarriewouldhavebeenmoresensitiveandmadeherselfscarce,butafteroverhearingSusie’s
accusationsyesterday,shewasn’tabouttodothat.O’Briensdidn’thide.Ofcourse,whattheyeventuallydidwasspeaktheirminds,andshewasn’tquitereadytodothat,either,especiallynotinfrontofanaudience.Atthefrontdoor,Carrie
pausedinamazement.“Youhavefurniture!”Thelivingroomhadbeentransformedfromanemptyshell
practicallyovernightintoacharming,cozyroomwiththeadditionofasofa,chairandtablesshe’dlastseeninSusie’sapartmentbeforesheandMackhadbuilttheirhomeonBeachLane.“Yes,butthat’snotthe
surprise,”Bobbytoldher.“Samsaysit’ssomethingelse,somethingjustforme.”Carrieglancedather
cousin.“Iheardyouwere
gatheringupthingsforSam’shouse.Youdidagreatjob.Thislookswonderful.”“Thanks,”Susiesaid
tightly.“Shealsopickedupafew
thingsshethoughtBobbymightlike,”Samsaid.Hepointedtowardacloset.“Checkinthere,pal.”Bobbyracedacrossthe
livingroomandthrewopenthedoor.Hiseyeswidened
evenashegaveawhoopofdelight.“Forme?Allofit?”“That’swhatIhear,”Sam
said.“ThisisallSusie’sdoing,sobesureyouthankher.”AsBobbystartedbringing
outbagsandinvestigatingthecontents,thereweremorewhoopsandgasps.EvenCarriewasalittleinaweofthemagnitudeofSusie’sgenerosity.
BobbypausedmidwaythroughcheckingouthisunexpectedhaulandthrewhisarmsaroundSusie.“Thankyou,thankyou!”“Youreallydidgoabove
andbeyond,yetagain,”Samsaid,clearlytakenaback.Susie’sfaceflushed.“Ijust
wantedhimtofeelathomehere.Iwasprettysureyou’dleftalotofthingsbehindinstorageandIthoughtnew
mightbenice,anyway.Sortofafreshstart.”“Thatwasreally
thoughtful,”Macktoldher,givingherhandasqueeze.“Itwas,”Carrieagreed,
thoughshesuspectedsheandMackbothunderstoodtherewasalotmorebehindthemagnanimousgesture.Susie,withallthebestintentionsintheworld,wastryingtobuyBobby’saffectionsandfill
thevoidinherheart.Carriecouldunderstandall
that.Shecouldsympathize,knowinghowSusiehadbeencountingontheadoptionthathadfallenthroughattheverylastminute.WhatshewashavingahardtimewithwasSusietryingtocastherasthebadguybecauseshewasformingabondwithBobbyandSam,too.“Howaboutsomethingto
drink?”Samsuggested,gettingtohisfeet.“Ihavesodas,beer,water.”“Ishouldprobablygo,”
Carriesaid.“IneedtogetJacksonovertoNoah’s.”Shesawtheundisguised
reliefinSusie’seyesasshespoke.Samdidn’targue,buthedidwalkhertothedoor.Outsidehestudiedher,hisexpressionpuzzled.“Whathappenedjust
now?”Shelookedintohiseyes.
“Noideawhatyoumean.”“Thetensionintherewas
sothickIcouldhavecutitwithaknife.AreyouandSusiefightingaboutsomething?”“No,”shesaid.Andthat
muchwastrue.Theyhadn’texchangedasingleharshwordwitheachother.Butthoseblastedbattlelineshad
beendrawnjustthesame.Shewonderedifthingsbetweenherandhercousinwouldeverbethesame.TheironywasthattheybothknewSusiewasmadlyinlovewithherhusband,soitwasn’tasiftheywerefightingoverthesameman.No,thebattlewasfortheheartofalittleboy,whoneededallthelovehecouldgetfrombothofthemandanyoneelseinthisnew
worldtowhichhewasadapting.
***
AfterdeliveringJacksontoNoah,Carriecouldn’tbringherselftogobacktoheremptyhouse.IfshediscoveredthatSusieandMackwerestillhangingoutatSam’s,hersourmoodwouldsinkevenlower.
Instead,sheheadedtoO’Brien’s,thoughshewonderedifthatwasagoodchoice.ThiswashardlyaproblemshecoulddumpinLuke’slap.Susiewashissister.Fortunatelythepubwas
alreadybusyandtherewerenoseatsatthebar,soshefoundatableinacornernearthefrontwindowandsettledinwithaglassofwine.With
theviewofthebayacrossthestreet,itwassurprisinglysoothing.Therewastimetolistentoherownthoughts...aboutthedaycare,abouthercousinand,ofcourse,aboutSam.Individuallyshecouldhavecopedwithanyonething,butcombined?Wasshedestinedtomakeabaddecisionaboutanyoneofthem,justbecauseshewastoobusytothink
thingsthrough?Allweretooimportantformissteps.She’dbeentherelessthan
halfanhourwithnoresolutiontoanyofherdilemmasandwasdebatingorderingdinner,whenshelookedupandfoundSambyhertable.“Interestedincompany?”
heasked.“Sure,”shesaid,then
glancedaround.“Where’s
Bobby?”“SusieandMackareatthe
housewithhim.Hedidn’twanttoleavehishauloftoys,sotheyofferedtohangout.”“Areyousurethat’sagood
idea?”sheasked,thenwinced.“Sorry.Notmybusiness.”Samreachedacrossthe
tableandtookherhand.“Carrie,what’sgoingon?That’sthesecondtimeI’ve
pickeduponsomesortoftensionbetweenyouandSusie.Youcarefullyavoidedgivingmeastraightanswerearlier.Howaboutnow?”Shedebatedbrushingoff
hisobservationforasecondtime,butcouldn’tquitebringherselftodoit.Thiswasamanshemightwanttohaveafutureofsomekindwith.Lyingorevenhedgingwasnowaytomoveforward.
“Okay,maybethereisanissue,”sheconceded,thenaddedearnestly,“butit’snotmydoing.”Shehesitated,stillnotconvincedshewantedtoairthisparticularbitoffamilylaundry.Samdidn’tpress.He
orderedanale,thenwatchedherandwaited.WhenCarrierealizedheapparentlyhadanendlesssupplyofpatiencetogoalongwithhiskeen
powersofobservation,shecontinued.“DidyouknowthatMack
andSusiewereintheprocessofadopting?”Henodded.“Mack
mentionedhowexcitedtheywere.”“Well,thebaby,agirl,was
bornafewweeksago,butthemombackedoutoftheadoption.”Samlookedshocked.“Can
shedothat?”“Apparently.”“Thatmusthavebeen
heartbreaking,”hesaid.“Butwhatdoesithavetodowithyou?”“Itshouldn’thaveathing
intheworldtodowithme,”shesaid.“ButyoubroughtBobbytotownaroundthesametime.Susie’sapparentlyfocusingallthatloveshewassodesperatetogiveanew
babyonBobbynow.”Samlookedmomentarily
stunned,thennoddedslowlyasunderstandingdawned.“Alotofthingssuddenlymakesensetome.TheveryfirstdayMackbroughtherbytoseeBobby,hewasclearlyworried.Hethoughtshewasgoingtogetalittlecarriedaway,didn’the?”“Morethanlikely.”“Andthosetoysshepicked
out.That’spartofherattempttobeapartofBobby’slife,”heconcluded.“I’dsayso.”“Isitmorethanthat?Isshe
waitingformetoscrewup,soshecantakelegalactionorsomething?”Carriewasstunnedbythat
possibility.“Ofcoursenot,”shesaid,thenhesitated.“Honestly,Idon’tknowwhatshe’slikelytodo.She’snot
thinkingclearlyrightnow.I’mtryingtomakeallowancesforthatmyself.”“Becauseyou’resomehow
caughtupinwhatever’sgoingonwithher,”heconcluded.“Buthow?Istilldon’tseetheconnection.”Shesmiled.Typicalmale,
oblivioustoanynuanceswhenitcametowomen.“Don’tyousee?ShethinksI’minherway,becauseyou
andIhavegottentobefriends.You’veturnedtomeacoupleoftimeswhenyouneededhelpwithBobby.”“Butthat’scrazy,”Sam
saidatonce.“She’smarriedtomyboss,happilyasnearasIcantell.”“Sam,it’snotaboutyou.
It’saboutmyrelationshipwithBobbyortheaccessthatmyfriendshipwithyouhasgivenmetohim.”
“Oh,boy,”Sammurmured.“SeewhatImeanabout
howcomplicatedthingshavesuddenlybecome?”Shenoticedtheworrybuildinginhiseyesandknewshehadtooffsetanypanicshemightinadvertentlyhavecaused.“Susie’sreallyagoodperson.She’sjustgoingthroughatrulyterribletime.Youdon’thavetoworryaboutBobbyoranythinglikethat.He’sin
perfectlygoodhands,especiallywithMackthere.Anditcan’thurt,havingsomanypeoplecaringabouthim,right?”“Isupposenot,”heagreed,
thoughhestilllookedconcerned.“You’rethinkingyou
shouldrushrighthome,aren’tyou?”“ShouldI?IsthefactthatI
lefttoseeyougoingtogoon
somelistshe’skeepingofmyquestionableparenting?”“Youhavetotrustyour
instincts,butminearetellingmethatallSusiewantsistospendtimewithBobbyandtohavearelationshipwithhim.You’llhavetowatchthattheattachmentdoesn’tgettoointenseorthatshedoesn’tgooverboardwiththepresentsagain,butbeyondthat,theSusieI’veknownmywhole
lifewouldneverdoanythingtohurtanyone.AndIcan’timaginehertryingtotakehimfromyou,anymorethanIwouldhave.”Samgaveherawrylook.
“ThatremarkImadeatShannaandKevin’shouseisgoingtocomebacktohauntme,isn’tit?”“Itcouldcomeupfrom
timetotime,”shesaid,“whenyouneedtobereminded
aboutleapingtoconclusions.Ofcourse,Iwasguiltyofthesamethingwhereyouwereconcerned.We’reokaynowthatweknoweachotherbetter.”“Youthinkthisthingwith
Susiewilleventuallyworkitselfout?”Carriethoughtaboutthat.
Shehonestlycouldn’tsay.IfSusiefocusedallherattentiononBobbyandcontinuedto
refusetoconsideranotheradoption,howhealthywouldthatbe?Thatwasaquestionforsomeoneawholelotwiserthanshewas.“Eventually,”shesaid,
thoughwithmorehopethanconviction.“MaybeI’lljusttouchbase
withMack,seehowthingsaregoingatthehouse,”Samsaid.“It’sthefirsttimeI’veleftBobbywithanyoneother
thanyou.I’lltellhimthat,sohedoesn’tjumptotheconclusionthatIdon’ttrusthimorSusie.Orfigureoutthatyou’vefilledmein.”“Goodidea.”Sammadethecall,looking
moreandmorerelievedashelistenedtoMack’sresponses.“Ifyou’resurethingsareundercontrol.ImightstickaroundthepubandhavedinnerwithCarrie.Doyou
mind?”Helistenedintently,thensmiled.“Sure,orderapizza.That’sBobby’sfavorite,sothatwouldbegreat.Thanks.”Hedisconnectedthecall,
putthephonebackinhispocket,thenfocusedonher.“Looksasifwecanfinallyhavethatdate.MaybeIshouldbethankingSusie,insteadofworryingabouther.”
“Iletyoujoinme,”Carrieremindedhim.“Nothingwassaidaboutdinneroradate.”AsparklelitSam’seyes.
“Carrie,wouldyouliketohavedinnerwithme?ThenIcanwalkyouhomeafter,maybeevenstealakissatyourfrontdoor.Thatseemslikeareasonablefirstdate.”“Mightybigplans,”she
commented.“Afirststep,”hecorrected.
“Thebigplansareformuchlater.”“AndwhatifIdon’tkiss
onthefirstdate?”“I’llseeifIcanchange
yourmind.IcanbeprettypersuasivewhenIputmymindtoit.”“Aninterestingchallenge.
So,what’sthetimetableforthesebigplansofyours?”“Iwasthinkingdownthe
roadadayortwoatleast,”he
said,chuckling.“ButI’maguy.I’mhappytospeedtheprocessalong.”Carrielaughed,butshehad
alittletroublecatchingherbreath.Shelikedwherethisseemedtobeheading.Theoldwisdomseemedtobetrue;therightmansometimesdidcomealongjustwhenapersonstoppedlooking.Sam’sexpressionsobered.
“So,what’sthedecision?
Willyoujoinmefordinnerandwhatevercomesafter?”“Let’sstartwithdinnerand
seehowitgoes.”Hereachedforherhand
andheldit.“Ithinkit’sgoingtogoverywell.”Carriecouldn’tseemto
stopherselffromnoddinginagreement.Foraneveningthathadstartedoutfraughtwithtension,itwasdefinitelyturningaroundinto
somethingveryintriguing.
***
SamlistenedtoCarriegoingonandonaboutherplansfortheday-carecenter.Herenthusiasmwascontagious.Hecouldenvisionexactlywhatitwasgoingtolooklikewhenrenovationswerecompletedandwhatthechildreninhercarewouldbe
doingeveryminuteoftheday.Shestoppedforbreath.
“I’mboringyoutotears,aren’tI?”“Absolutelynot.It’s
wonderfultoseeyousocaughtupinyourplans.You’veobviouslyfoundyourpassion.Fromwhatyoutoldmewhenwemet,it’ssomethingyouwerestrugglingwith.”
“ItrulythinkIhave,”shesaid.Sheglancedattheuntouchedfoodonherplate.“Ofcourse,becauseI’vebeentalkingsomuch,myfood’sgonecold.Howaboutyou?Tellmeaboutyourpassion,whileIeat.Waswebdesignitforyoufromtheverybeginning,thethingyouknewyouweremeanttodo?”“Notentirely,”Sam
admitted.“ItwasacareerI
knewIcouldtakeanywhereIwantedtolive.WhetherIhaveoneclientlikethenewspaperorfiftyclientsallovertheworld,IcandotheworkwhereverIgo.”“Soit’smorea
conveniencethanapassion?”“Thatprobablymakesit
soundalittlemorecalculatingthanImeantto.Ilovethework.Ialwaysenjoyedartanddesignand
thetechstuffcameeasilytome.Thewebsideofdesignjustseemedtobeanaturalfitformypassionandformydesiretobefootlooseandtravel.Andthesedaysthere’sahugedemandforwhatIdo.Newspapersareintransition.Eventuallythey’llbemostlyonline.Everybodywantsanonlinepresencefortheirbusiness.”“Therearetwopartsofthat
weshouldtalkabout,”Carriesaid.“You’llhavetogettoknowmystepfatherbetter.Hisfirstlovewasgraphicdesign.Hisfathertriedtosteerhimintorunningthecommunitybankhereintown,butTracebalkedandfocusedonhisdesigncareer.Hegetstoworkfromhome,sohewasthereforCaitlynandmewhenMomcouldn’tbe.ThesamewithPatrick,
thoughTraceandMomclaimmybrotherisnotthelittleangelmytwinandIwere.”Samlaughed“Theysay
thatoryoudo?”“Okay,that’smy
interpretation.”“Andtheotherthingwe
needtodiscuss?”“Yourdesiretowander.
What’sthatabout?”“I’veneveranalyzedit,but
Isupposeit’sbecausemy
momhadalwayswantedtoseetheworld.Shemusthavehadahundredtravelmemoirsinthehouseandreadthemtousinsteadofstorybooks.Iwasfascinatedbythosebooks.”“Didsheevergettoseeall
ofthoseexoticplaces?”Samshookhishead,
surprisedbythedepthofsorrowthatwashedoverhim.“Shehadgottenpregnant
withLaurel,marriedmyfatherandspentherlifestuckinatinythree-bedroomhouseinthesuburbsofCleveland.ThelongesttripsheevertookwasdowntoColumbus,andthatwasonlybecausemydadwantedtogotailgatingwithhisbuddiesandtheirwivesatanOhioStatefootballgame.”“Nogirlfriendsshecould
travelwith?”Carrieasked.“Nofriendsofherown,”
Samcorrected.“Inhindsight,Ithinkmydadabusedherpsychologicallybyisolatingherandcontrollingher.Shedidn’thavethestrengthtowalkaway,thoughthereweresomeprettyintensefightsfromtimetotime.Laureltriedtoprotectmefromallthat,butIheardwaytoomuch.”“Kidsusuallydo,”Carrie
said.
“InsomecrazywayIwantedtoshapemylifetodothethingsmymotherhadn’tbeenabletodo.Ialwaysintendedtotakeheralongtotheplacesshe’ddreamedabout,butbythetimeIcouldhavedonethat,shewastoosicktotravel.Attheend,Isatbesideherbedandtoldherstoriesandshowedherpicturesfrommytravels.”“Oh,Sam,”Carrie
whispered,hereyesdampwithtears.Hetriedtoshrugoffthe
memories.“Anyway,therewillbenomoretripsformefortheforeseeablefuturenowthatIhaveBobbyinmylife.”“Areyouafraidyou’ll
resenthimbecauseofthat?”Carrieaskedwithsurprisinginsight.“Doyousomehowseethisasarepeatofwhathappenedtoyourmom?”
“Iwasworriedaboutthatwhenallofthisfirsthitme,butyouknowwhat?I’mstartingtorealizebeingaparentisitsownkindofadventure.AndI’mverygladthatifithadtohappen,ithappenedafterI’dmovedtoChesapeakeShores.Iwasn’tthinkingaboutitwhenItookthejob,butnowItrulyappreciatewhatagreatplacethiswillbetoraiseachild.”
Heleveledalookintohereyes.“Andthenthere’syou.Icertainlycan’tregretanythingthathasbroughtmeclosertoyou.Ifyouhadn’tjumpedallovermeforleavingBobbyinthecarthenightwegotbacktotown,whoknowshowlongitmighthavebeenbeforewecrossedpaths.”Shesmiled.“Youthink
thatwasfate?”“I’mnotsurehowIfeel
aboutfateordestinyorwhateveryouwanttocallit.Whataboutyou?Anythoughtsaboutwhetherthere’sonerightpersonforallofus?”“I’vegrownupinafamily
ofromantics,”Carrietoldhim.“HowcouldInotbelievethat?Ijustspentalongtimelookingformysoulmateinallthewrongplaces.”“Anyregretsaboutthat?”
Herexpressionturnedthoughtful.“Youknowwhat?Notreally.IthinkIlearnedsomethingfromallofmymistakes,evenmiserableMarc.IfiguredoutwhatIdon’tneedinmylife.”Shemethisgaze.“AndlatelyI’vestarteddiscoveringwhatIdoneed.”“Ashiftinpriorities?”“No,justasudden
awarenessthatthere’smore
thanonewaytoapproachthosepriorities.Familywillalwaysbefirstforme,withafulfillingcareeraclosesecond.Ifyoustudymyfamily,you’lldiscoverthatmostofthemhaveachievedabalancebetweenthosetwothings,evenifittookafewofthemalittlelongerthanitdidothers.”“Inevergavemuch
thoughttohavingafamily,”
Samsaid,drawingashockedlook.“IknowthatmustbestrangetoanO’Brien,butmyfamilywasverydifferentfromyours.LaurelandIwerefairlycloseaskids,butwe’vehadourdifferencesasadults.”“Butyoursisterleftyou
custodyofherson.Thatmustmeanshetrustedyou.”“Therewasnooneelse,”
herepliedsimply.“Iwasthe
defaultguy.IknowshebelievedI’ddorightbyBobby.SodidRobert.Butifthey’dhadanyotherviableoption,theyprobablywouldhavetakenit.Robert’sparentsarearound,butthey’reolderandalittletoosetintheirwaysforthechaosakidBobby’sagewouldbringintotheirlives.Theydidtalktoalawyeraboutfightingmeforcustody,butI
thinktheywererelievedwhenheadvisedthemtheywereunlikelytowin.”“Willtheycontinuetobea
partofhislife?”“Ofcourse,iftheywantto
be.I’lltakehimtovisitorinvitethemhere.IcanseethevalueofBobbyknowingI’mnottheonlyfamilyhehas.”“Nowthatyou’vehad
sometime,howdoyoufeelaboutbecomingadad
overnight?”“It’sanadjustment,”he
admitted.“Iwasaprettycarefreeguy.NowIhavenochoicebuttothinkofsomeoneotherthanmyself.FortunatelyBobby’saterrifickid.Ithinkwe’regoingtodookay.ItmayberockyfromtimetotimewhileIfindmyway,butthere’snothinglikeakidtokeepaguyhonest.”Hesmiledather.“You’ve
beendoingthat,too.Idon’twanttoleteitherofyoudown.That’sascaryprospect,becauseIknowsoonerorlaterIwill.Untilthishappened,I’dledaprettyselfishexistence,doingwhateverappealedtome,takingoffatamoment’snoticeifsomethingthatsoundedexcitingcameup.Thosedaysaredone.”Hewassurprisedtorealize
thathenolongerregrettedthatthewayhehadwhenhe’dfirstgraspedallthechangeshewasgoingtohavetomaketolifeashe’dknownit.“Aslongasyou’redoing
thebestyoucan,youwon’tleteitherofusdown,”Carrieassuredhim.Herconfidence,especially
giventheirrockyfirstmeeting,meantalot.“I’ve
alreadymademistakes,asyoucanattest.”“Findmeonehumanbeing
whohasn’t,”shecountered.“Oroneparentwhohasn’tmadeaboatloadofthem.Mygrandparents,theultimaterolemodelsforafamilymatriarchandpatriarchnow,madesomedoozies.I’llfillyouinsometime.Mistakesarepartoflife.It’swhatyoudotofixthingsthatreally
matters.”“I’mgoingtoremindyou
ofthatnexttimeyou’rescoldingmefortheerrorofmyways.”“Ivowedtogiveyou
gentleadvice,notscoldings,remember?”Samtouchedherhandto
makesurehehadherfullattention.“IthinkImightmissthefireinyoureyeswhenyou’retellingmeI’ve
gottenitallwrong.”Sheglancedupathis
wordsandhemethergaze.“There’ssomethingabouta
redheadwithafullheadofsteamthatgetstome,”hesaid.“Makesmewanttodiscoverwhatelseshemightbesopassionateabout.”“Iguesswe’llsee,won’t
we?”shesaid,atellinghitchinhervoice.Forthefirsttimesince
they’dbegunthisdance,Samwasstartingtobelievetheymightgetthestepsjustright.
***
“Thishouseisamazing,”LucyenthusedasshewalkedfromroomtoroominthepropertyCarriewashopingtoturnintoherday-carecenter.“Lucy’sright,”Julieadded.
“Theopenconceptisvery
workableforkeepinganeyeonthekidsfromanyplaceyouhappentobe,yetit’seasilydividedintoactivityareas.”“Thenyouthinkitwill
work?”Carriesaid,excitedbytheirenthusiasm.She’dbeenholdingherbreathawaitingtheirreaction.Iftheyapproved,shewasreadytomoveforwardfirstthingMondaymorning.Connor
wasonstandbytoclosethedeal.Shekneweventhenshe’dbeweeks,ifnotmonths,awayfromopening,butowningtherightpropertywouldmakethedreamfeelreal.She’dhavesomethingconcretetoshowforallthestepsshe’dtakeninthisnewdirection.“Notadoubtinmymind,”
Juliesaid.Shehandedoverafewpagesfromanotebook
she’dbeenwritinginsinceshe’darrived.“Notesonthingsyou’llneedtoaddresstobringituptocodeforaday-carecenter.Aninspectormighthavemore,butthisshouldcovermostofit.Whenareyouthinkingofopening?”“AssoonasIcantakecare
ofthislistandgetallthelicensesandapprovalsIneed.”
“Thatcouldtakeawhile,”Juliecautioned.“Bureaucracydoesn’tmovequickly.”“Iknow.Mycousin’sa
lawyer.He’swarnedmenottogetaheadofmyself.”“AndIimagineyou’llhave
yourgrandfather’shelpwiththerenovations?”Juliesaid.Carriechuckled.“Yes,but
notjustbecausehe’sanoutstandingarchitectandhasyearsofconstruction
experience.”“Thenwhy?”Lucyasked,
regardinghercuriously.“Itwillkeephimfocused
onthis,insteadofmysociallife,”Carriesaidcandidly.Lucy’sexpression
brightened.“Tellusmore!”“Stopbeingnosy,”Julie
chidedherdaughter,thengrinned.“Unlessofcourseyou’dliketoshare,Carrie.It’sbeensolongsinceI’ve
beenonadateIcanbarelyrememberwhatitwaslike.Iyearntolivevicariously,andLucyisprettytight-lippedaboutsharinganydetailsaboutthemeninherlife.Shehasn’tbroughtonetothehousetomeetmeinyears.”“Becauseyouinterrogate
them,”Lucygrumbled,thoughhereyesweretwinkling.“Beenthere,donethat,”
Carriesaid.“So,isthefatherofthat
littleboywhocametothecenterwithyoupartofthesocial-lifeequation?”Julieasked.“Nowwho’sbeingnosy?”
Lucyteased.Carrielaughed.“Letme
takeyouonatourofthetown,thenI’llfillyouinoverlunch.There’snotmuchtotell,though.”
Thoughafterdinnertheothernight,therewereafewadditionaldetails.Thoseshethoughtsheprobablyoughttokeeptoherselffornow.Tohersurpriseanddelight,itturnedoutthatSamhadthewholekissingthingdownpat.Ithadtakeneveryounceofherwillpowernottodraghiminsidetofindoutwhatelsehe’dmastered!ShecaughtLucynudging
hermom.“Carrie’sblushing.Did
younotice?”Julielaughed.“Inoticed.
Maybeweshouldskipthetourandgostraighttolunch.”“Notachance,”Carrie
said,chuckling.“IwanttoshowoffChesapeakeShores.”Anhourlaterthey’dhada
condensedtourofthetownandwereseatedata
waterfronttableontheoutsidedeckatBrady’s.“Thisisafantasticlittle
town,”Juliesaidasshedrankhericedtea.“Icanseewhyyouloveit.Ican’timaginewhyIhaven’tdrivenoverthiswayinsolong.”“Well,thismaybethefirst
time,butitdefinitelywon’tbethelast,”Lucysaid.“Mom,Ithinkweshouldlookforahouse.The
commutetothecenterwouldn’tbethatawfulandI’veseensomeveryattractivemenintown.”“I’mtoooldtobelooking
foraman,”Juliesaid.“Butyouarerightaboutthetown.Icanalmostimaginehowrelaxingitwouldbetocomehometoaplacelikethisafteratoughday.Icouldseemyselfsittingoutherewithaglassofwineand
unwinding.”“MycousinLukehasapub
that’sgreatforunwindingandspendingtimehangingoutwithlocals.Sally’sCaféhasitsowncrowdinthemorningsandonweekends,especiallywhenit’snottouristseason,”Carriesaid.“Youreallyshouldconsiderit,Julie.Iloveitbecauseit’sbeenhomeformostofmylife,butI’velivedinalotof
otherplacesand,believeme,nothingcompares.”“We’llsee,”Juliesaid.“Mom,what’sholdingyou
back?”Lucyprodded.“Youhateourhouse.Youhatethetrafficandhowcrowdedeverything’sgotten.”“Butitisamuchlonger
commutefromhere,”Julieprotested,thoughnotveryconvincingly.“Mostlyonacountryroad
that’snotthatbusy,”Carriesaid,addingherencouragementtoLucy’s.“Andyou’dgettokeepaneyeonme,makesureyourprotégéisn’tmessingup.”Julieshookherhead.“I’m
notworriedaboutthat.You’regoingtodojustfine.”“Maybeweshouldback
off,”CarriesuggestedtoLucy.“Givehersometimetodrawherownconclusions.”
“Nowthere’sanintriguingconcept,”Juliesaidwryly.“Iraisedalittlebulldozer.WhenLucywantssomething,shetendstorollrightoveranyoneoranythingthatgetsinherway.”Carrielaughed.“Welcome
tomyworld!Ihaveawholeslewofpeopleinmylifeexactlylikethat.Ifyoufigureouthowtostayoutoftheway,letmeknow.”
Julienodded.“I’lladdittothoselistsI’mpassingalongtoyou.”Sheturnedherattentiontotheplatethewaiterhadjustplacedinfrontofherandsighed.“NowIamgoingtofocusonthesescallopsandsavoreverysinglebite.ThisissofarbeyondmyusualsaladdietImayneverleave.”LucyandCarriegaveeach
otherhighfives.
“Missionaccomplished,”Lucysaidtriumphantly.Juliejustgaveherdaughter
along,hardlookandkeptrightoneating.Carrieenviedthemthe
bondthey’dformedbothasmotheranddaughterandascoworkers.Shewasclosetoherownmom,sosheknewhowrareitwastoviewaparentasapersonandnotjustanauthorityfigure.She
hopedBobbyandSamfoundthatsortofrelationshiponeday.Ironically,shecouldn’thelpthinkinginsomewayitmightbeeasierbecauseofhowthey’dcometobetogether.ThehardpartforbothofthemmightbetheadjustmenttothinkingofSamastheauthoritypersoninBobby’slife,ratherthanthefununclewhobreezedintohislifeandoutagain.
OneofthesedayssheneededtothinkaboutSam’swanderingwaysandwhethertheytrulywerebehindhim.EventhoughheseemedtohaveacceptedhisresponsibilityforBobbydidn’tmeanthetwoofthemcouldn’trelocateatthedropofahat.Andwherewouldthatleaveher?Everytimeshestartedtothinkshewasreadytotakeanotherriskwithher
heart,herheadjumpedinwithsomethingjustlikethistorenewhercaution.
17
Samdidn’thaveachancetotalktoMackprivatelyuntillateonTuesdayafterthey’dgottenthewebeditionofthepaperonlineandtheprinteditiontothecompanythatprinteditanddeliveredthebundlesofpaperstotownon
Wednesdaymorning.Unsureofexactlyhowto
begin,Samfumbledthroughafewattempts,thenfinallysettledforsayingagainhowgenerousSusiehadbeen.Mackgavehimalong
look,thensighedheavily.“Iknowitwastoomuch,”hesaideventually.“AndIappreciateyounotcallingheronit.Susie’sstrugglingrightnow.”
“Iheardabouttheadoption,”Samsaid.“I’msorry,but—”“ButBobbycan’tbethe
substituteforthebabywedidn’tget,”Macksaid,completingthethought.“Iknowthat,Sam.ButIcan’ttellyouhowworriedI’vebeenabouther.BeingaroundBobbymakesherhappy.Don’ttakethatlifelineawayfromher.”
“Iwasn’tgoingto,”Samsaid.“Butmaybeweshouldhavesomeboundaries.”“Thatmakessense,”Mack
agreedreadily.“Doyouhavesomethinginmind?”Samshookhishead.“I
havenoideawhattheyoughttobe.Maybethatsheneedstocheckwithmefirstbeforeshoweringhimwithgiftsormakingarrangementstospendalittletimewithhim.
Doyouthinkshecandothosetwothingswithoutfeelingasifshe’sbeingcutofffromcontactwithhimorthatI’mretaliatinginsomeway?Parentingisstillbrand-newtome,andthisparticularsituationwithSusiedefinitelywasn’toneIanticipated.”“Seemstomeyou’re
managingjustfine,”Macksaid.“Thenagain,Ididn’texactlyhaveanideal
backgroundtocompareitto.Iwasn’tatallsureIwaspreparedtobeafather.”Hesighed.“Maybenoonewithanysenseeveris.Youjustdothebestyoucan.”“Isurehopethat’swhatit
takes,”Samsaid,“becauseIwakeupeverydayfeelingasifI’mabouttofailabysmally.”“Andyetyoudidn’ttake
theeasywayout.”
“Whatwaywasthat?”“Youdidn’tturnBobby
overtohisgrandparents,You’vesaidtheywantedtofightyouforcustody.Youcouldhavewalkedawaywithaclearconscience.”Samshrugged.“Laureland
Robertchoseme.Theymusthavehadtheirreasons.Icouldn’tletthem—orBobby—downwithoutatleasttrying.Therehavebeena
coupleofmomentshereandtherewhenI’veactuallythoughtthingswillworkoutokay.Bobby’sagreatkid.”“Hereallyis,”Mack
agreed.“YoushouldhaveheardhimwithSusie.”Thewordswerenosooneroutofhismouth,thanheheavedasigh.“Aboutthoseboundaries,Ithinkwhatyousuggestedisperfectlylogical.Thatsaid,Idon’tknowhow
muchlogicentersintoanythingwithmywifethesedays.I’lldomybesttomakeherseethattheboundariesareinBobby’sbestinterests.”“I’dreallyappreciatethat,”
Samtoldhim.“Undernormalconditions,
Susieisgreatwithallthekids,butsheseemstohavecreatedsomesortofspecialattachmenttoBobby.Justthismorning,shementioned
casuallythatshewonderedwho’dbelookingafterhimtonightwhileyou’rehere.ItoldherIwassureyou’dmadearrangements.Ittookallofmypersuasivepowerstokeepherfromcallingyouwithanoffertobabysit.”Mackfrownedevenashe
toldthestory,thenasked,“Orwouldyouhavewelcomedtheoffer?IfeelasifI’mwalkingatightropehere.”
“IhadalreadymadeplansforBobby.He’soveratKevin’s.”Samrecalledthatconversation,thengaveMackacuriouslook.“IthoughtShannawassupposedtobeatyourhouseforsomefamilybook-clubthingthatSusie’shosting.”“Susiewasreadytocancel
thatifyouneededher,”Mackadmittedwithagrimace.“SeewhatImean?She’smade
Bobbyatoppriority.”HestudiedSamforaminute,thensaidalittletoocasually,“IfiguredBobbywouldbewithCarrie.”Samrecognizedthatthere
wasmoretothequestion—thatMack,likeeveryoneelseinthefamily,wastryingtofigureouttheirrelationship.“Carrie’snotmy
designatedbabysitter,”hesaid,keepinghistoneneutral.
Hemightbeannoyedbytheprobing,butitwassecondnaturetoO’Briensandanyoneconnectedtothem.“She’sagoodfriend.Rightnowshe’stryingtogetherdaycarereadytoopen.Shehasplentyonherplatewiththat.She’sofferedtopitchinwhenIneedher,butI’mnotgoingtotakeadvantageofher.”“Susieseemstothinkyou
twoareanitem.”AssoonasMackspoke,hewinced.“Listentome.I’mturningintoasbadagossipastherestofthetown,tryingtowheedleinformationoutofyou.”AtleastMackobviously
feltguilty,whichallowedSamtochuckleathisdiscomfort.“Verylittleinformationtowheedle,”hesaidwithcompletecandor.“We’reexploringthe
possibilitiesandthatisthelastIintendtosayaboutthat.”HeleveledalookthatwasintendedtomakeMacksquirm.“Unlessyourroleasmybossextendstomylifeoutsidetheoffice.”“Nope.Thetopicis
closed,”Macksaid.“Ishouldbegettinghome.Susiewasn’tlookingforwardtothiswholebook-clubgathering.Shewasconvincedthewomen
plannedtostagesomesortofintervention.”“Aretheyqualifiedtodo
that?”Samasked,startled.“Hardly,butitdoesn’t
mattertoanO’Brien.Whentheyperceivethatoneoftheirownisstrugglingwithanything,theyjumponthecase.It’sablessingandacurse.Rightnow,mywifeconsidersittobeacurse.Shewantstowallowabitand,if
youaskme,shehasarightto.It’snotthewallowingthatworriesmehalfasmuchasthemanicstuffthatinvolvesyournephew.Thanksfortryingtooverlookthatoratleastkeepitinperspective.I’lldomybesttoseethatitdoesn’tgetoutofhand.”Samnodded.“Fairenough.
Iamsorryashellaboutthewholeadoptionthing.Herethetwoofyouaresoanxious
tobeparentsandIwindupwithcustodyofmynephew.Lifesuretakessomeunexpectedtwists.”“Itdoesthat,”Mack
agreed.“I’vegivenupontryingtofigureouttheplanandtriedtolearnjusttogowiththeflow.Susie’scancertaughtmethatlife’sprecariousandasmartpersonmakesthemostofwhatever’she’sgiven.”
“Notabadphilosophy,”Samsaid.Itmightbeonehe’ddowelltofollowhimself,insteadofquestioningeveryunanticipatedtwistandturn.
***
Carriehadpapersspreadalloverherdining-roomtableandachecklistwhichseemedtobegrowing,ratherthan
gettingshorter.Whenhercellphonerang,sheanswereditwithanunmistakabletouchofimpatience.Hertonewasmetbyan
equallytestyquestion.“Whyaren’tyouatmyhouse?”Carriestaredatthephone
inshockbeforeanswering.“Susie?”“Ofcourseit’sme.It’s
book-clubnightandeveryoneelseishereandthey’reall
wonderingwhatI’vedonetooffendyou.Ofcoursenoonehasactuallysaidaword,butIcantellbythewaythey’relookingatme.Isthatwhatyouwanted,togetthewholefamilyonyourside?It’snotenoughthatthisgreatlittlekidjustfellintoyourlife?”Carriesighed.“Susie,this
isaconversationweprobablyneedtohaveface-to-face,butcertainlynottonightinfront
ofhalfthefamily.”“Thenyouagreethere’sa
problem?”“Ithinkmaybeyou’veseen
onethatdoesn’texist,atleastnotfrommyperspective.”“Sonowyou’resaying
I’m,what,crazy?Imaginingthatyou’removinginonSamandBobby?”Carrieclungtoher
patiencebyathread.“I’mnotdiscussingthiswithyou,not
likethis.”Silencegreetedherremark.
Thensheheardwhatsoundedlikeasob.“Susie?”Whentherewas
noreply,justmorechokedsobs,Carrietriedagain.“Susie,saysomething.Areyouokay?”“OfcourseI’mnotokay,”
Susiesaid,anoteofnearhysteriainhervoice.“IfIwere,Iwouldn’tbeacting
likethis.Carrie,I’msorry.Itrulyam.I’vegottenintothisawful,darkplaceandIcan’tseemtodragmyselfout.”Everybitofangerdrained
awayasCarrieheardthesincerityandfearbehindhercousin’swords.“I’mcomingover,”shesaidquietly.“No,youwereright.This
isn’tthetimetohavesomesortofconfrontation.”“Howaboutjusta
conversation,”Carriesuggested.“Everysinglepersonovertheretonightlovesyouandwantstohelp.Iwanttohelp,butnoneofusknowwhatyoureallyneed.”“Ineedababyofmyown,
achildIcanhold,”Susiewhispered,ahitchinhervoice.“Andnoneofyoucangivemethat.”“Connordesperatelywants
tohelpyoufindthatbaby,”
Carrietoldher.“Youjustneedtotellhimyou’rereadytotryagain.EverybodyinthisfamilywantsyouandMacktofindtheperfectchild.”“I’lltakeanychild.Heor
shedoesn’thavetobeperfect.Goodnessknows,MackandIhaveourflaws.Irrationaljealousycomestomind.”“Itwasirrational,”Carrie
agreed.“Butunderstandable.NowI’mheadingoverthere.How’sthesupplyofBen&Jerry’s?”“Therewereatleastsix
pintsbymycount,”Susiesaid.“EveryonemusthavethoughtIwasteeteringonthebrink.”Carrielaughed.“I’llbring
afewmore.Onepintapieceseemsaboutrightonanightlikethis.”
“Thankyou.”“It’sicecream.Nobig
deal.”“No,forforgivingmy
craziness.Youhaveforgivenme,right?”“Forgivenandforgotten,”
Carriepromised.That’swhatshehopedanyoneinthefamilywoulddoforherifsheeverwentoffthedeepend.
***
SamfoundCarrieatthecaféfirstthingonWednesdaymorning,sittingwiththeusualgroupofO’Brienwomen.TohissurpriseSusiewasamongthem,lookingmorerelaxedthanhe’dseenhersincethey’dfirstmet.Maybethatinterventionthingthey’dsupposedlystagedhadhelped,afterall.“MindifIborrowCarrie?”
heinquired,thoughhe
honestlydidn’texpectanyobjections.“Youdon’twanttojoin
us?”Breeaskedhopefully.“Yes,dojoinus,”Heather
said.“Wewouldn’tmindobservingthedynamicsbetweenyoutwosowecoulddrawourownconclusions.Carriewon’ttellusathing.”Samlaughed.“Goodfor
Carrie.”Hemethergaze.“Doyoumindcomingwith
me?”“Togetawayfromthese
meddlers?I’mallyours,”shesaideagerly.“Ofcourseyouare,”Bree
commentedwithsatisfaction.Outside,hestudied
Carrie’sface,smilingatthescatteringoffrecklesacrosshernoseandimagininghowthoseprobablyirritatedher.Hecouldn’thelpwonderingexactlywhenthesightofher
hadstartedtofillhimwithsuchanintenseburstofhappiness.He’dneverthoughtofhimselfaslonelyorincomplete,butthatwasbeforehe’dmetthiswomanwhomadehimfeelasifhewerewhole.AddinBobby,andhislifewasfullinwayshe’dneveranticipated.Itwasalittlescary,butnotsoterrifyingthathedidn’twanttostickaroundtoseewhat
camenext.“Okay,you’vegottenme
awayfrommyfamily,forwhichIamprofoundlygrateful,”CarriesaideventuallyastheyheadedtowardShoreRoad.“What’sonyourmind?”Heregardedherblankly.
“Nothinginparticular.Why?”“Yourealizethatmakesno
sense.Youinterruptedaget-
together,draggedmeaway,andforwhat?Youhavenoidea?”Hegrinned.“Ispottedyou
insideatSally’sandsuddenlyfeltthisneedtohaveyoualltomyself.”“Really?”shesaid,
soundingsurprised,evenasasmileseemedtobespreadingacrossherface.“Ican’tgetenoughofyou,
Iguess.Doyoumind?”
“Sincetheywereabouttensecondsawayfrominterrogatingmeyetagainaboutourrelationship,yourtimingcouldn’thavebeenbetterfrommyperspective,thoughIimaginemydisappearancejustnowwillonlyfueltheiralreadyoveractiveimaginations.”“Sorry.”Sheshruggeditoff.“It’s
whattheydo.”
“Howaboutacappuccino?”heaskedastheyturnedthecorner.“IcangetthemtogoatPaniniBistroandwecansitononeofthebenchesacrossthestreet.Doyouhavetime?”Carrienodded.“Sure.
JacksonisatthechurchdaycaretodayandI’mnotvolunteeringatJulie’s.Ihaveamillionandonethingstodoatmynewbuilding,but
GrandpaMickisoverseeingthatandthelesstimeIspendunderfoot,thebetter.Hishelpcomeswithtoomanyintrusivequestions.”“SoI’vesavedyouon
severalfrontsthismorning?”“Atleasttwo,”sheagreed.
“Yay,you!”Yay,indeed,Samthought.
“I’llgetthecoffees.Whydon’tyousnagabenchbeforethetouristsgrabthemall?”
WhenSamrejoinedher,shewasstaringathercellphonewithafrownonherface.“Problem?”heaskedashe
handedoverhercoffee,thensatnexttoher.Shelookedstartledbyhis
return.Shequicklyjammedthephoneinherpurse,thegestureoddlyangry.“No,”shesaidtersely.Samregardedherin
silenceandwaited.“Okay,itwasatextfrom
Marc,”shesaid.“Thedesignerjerk,”Sam
said,drawingafaintsmile.“Couldn’thavedescribed
himbettermyself,”shesaid.“Whatdidhewant?”“Hewantedmetoreturn
hiscallsoroneoftheprevioustentextshe’ssentovernight.”Samfelthisheartbeat
accelerateinsomethingthatfeltlikepanic.“Seemstobeimportant.”Shedrewinadeepbreath,
thenforcedabrightsmilethatdidn’tfooleitheroneofthem.“Nottome.”Sheglancedtowardthebay.“It’sanabsolutelybeautifulmorning,isn’tit?”Thebay,sparklingwith
morningsunlight,wasspreadbeforethem.Thebluesky
wasdottedwiththemerestwispsofwhiteclouds.Ospreysswoopedoverhead,thenheadedforimpressivenestsatoppolesthathadbeenerectedspecificallyforthatpurpose.Thetownhadinstalledtheminanattempttokeeptheospreyfromchoosingthesewaterfrontbenchesfortheirnests,astheyhadoneyear,forcingthehumanstoremainata
distance.Bobbyhadtoldhimaboutthat.ApparentlyadelightedDaveyhadfilledhimin,whileexplainingthattheospreywereprotected.“Beautiful,”Samagreed,
thoughhisgazewasonCarrie.“We’removingintofall.I
wonderhowmanymoregloriousdayswe’llhavelikethis,”Carriesaid,herfaceturneduptothesun.“When
it’slikethis,IwishIcouldsitrightherealldaylong.”“Courtingsunburn?”Sam
teased,touchingafingertiptohernose.“EnoughSPF30andIcan
sithereindefinitely,”shecountered.“Thesefrecklessuggest
you’veforgottenitatimeortwo.”“Yes,well,Momand
Gramcouldn’talwayscatch
mebeforeIgotoutside,”shesaidwithalaugh,thensuddenlypulledhercellphonefromherpurse.Samregardedher
curiously.“Areyougoingtorespondtothattext,afterall?”“Notachance.Youjust
remindedmetoaddsuntanlotiontomylistofsuppliesforthedaycare,”shesaid,typingaquicknotetoherself.
Sampluckedthephonefromhergraspandtuckeditintohisownpocket.“Obviouslymymerepresenceisn’tenoughtodistractyou,”hemurmured.Hereyeswidened.“What
didyouhaveinmind?”“ThesamethingI’vehad
inmindeversincethefirsttimeIdidit,”hesaid,movingcloseruntilhecouldclaimherlips.
Thekisswasasintoxicatingashe’dremembered,maybeevenalittlemorepotent.Champagneintoxicating,ratherthanbeer,perhaps.Whateveritwas,hecouldn’trecallasingletimeinhislifewhenasimplekisshadmadehimlongtoleapintosomethingmorethanbed,somethinglasting.Whenhepulledaway,he
keptahandagainsthercheekinacaress.“JustthewayIremembereditfromtheothernight,”hesaid.“Bettereven.”Carriesmiled.“Ismy
techniqueimproving?”“No,youjustgetmore
infatuatingeverytimeIseeyou.”“Whoknewyouhadsucha
waywithwords?DoesMackknowaboutthat?He’llhaveyouwritingarticlesaswellas
designingthepaper,ifyou’renotcareful.”Samchuckled.“Trustme,
Mackdoesnotinspiremetowaxpoetic.”Heheldhergaze.“Ireallywanttokissyouagain,”hemurmured.“Whydon’tyou?”“BecauseIamsuddenly
verymuchawarethatwearesittinginpublicinbroaddaylightjustacrossthestreetfromshopsownedbyyour
grandmotherandHeather,aswellasLuke’spub.”“Goodpoint,”shesaid,
thoughhersighsuggestedshewasasdisappointedbythatashewas.“Maybewecouldcontinue
thislater,someplacealittlemoreprivate.Ican’tabandonBobbyagaintonight,butyoucouldcomeoverfordinner.Maybehangouttillafterhe’sasleep.Anyinterest?”
“What’sfordinner?”“IthinkIcanmanage
burgersonthegrillandasalad.”“Whydon’tIbring
dessert?I’mthinkingvanillaicecreamandsomepeaches.Ifoundsomeatthefarmstandyesterday,lastoftheseasonmorethanlikely.”“Bobbywilllovethat.”Sheregardedhimwith
surprise.“Notyou?”
Samwinkedather.“Ihaveamuchmoregrown-updessertinmind.”Carrielaughed.“Then
you’reinforabigdisappointment.NotwithBobbyinthehouse.”Herealizedshewasdead
seriousandsighed.“You’reright.Wedon’twanthimtocatchusintheactandstartgettingideas.”“Exactly,”shesaid.
“You’restartingtothinklikeaparent.”“ButIstillwantsomeof
theperksofbeingabachelor,”hetoldher,leaningintostealonemorequickkissmeanttoholdhim.“Patience,”shesaid.“I’m
notgoinganywhere.”She’dtoldSamthatbefore,
buthecertainlydidn’tmindthereassurance.Becausedespiteherenthusiasmforher
day-careprojectandheravowedloveforChesapeakeShores,hecouldn’thelpwonderingifsomedaydowntheroadtheallureofParisorItalywouldsuddenlybecometoostrongtoresist.AndwithMarcReynoldsseeminglytryingtogetbackintothepicture,itwasaconcernhecouldn’tseemtoshake.WasCarrieasimmunetothemanassheseemedtobe?Ordid
hehavethepowertohurtheryetagain?
***
Carriehadbeensurprisedbyhowmuchredtapewasinvolvedwithgettingherselflicensedtoopenaday-carefacility.Sheprobablyshouldn’thavebeen,givenalltheinstructionsJuliehadgivenher.Maybeitwasthe
factthatinsomanywaysbeinganO’Brienmadelifeeasy.Hergrandfatherwasusuallyabletomakehurdlesdisappear.Notthistime.Shewasdealingwithanew,by-the-booksbureaucracy,andsherelishedthechallenge.Betweenthepaperwork,
doingtherenovationsshefeltwerenecessarytocreateabrightcomfortablespaceforthekids,interviewingforhelp
anddoingbackgroundchecksonhertopcandidates,keepingupwithheronlineclassesandstillvolunteeringatJulie’s,shehadpreciouslittletimeforbabysittinghernephewortheotherO’Brienchildrenwho’dbeencomingaroundforthepastfewmonths.Thefewstolenmomentsshe’dsharedwithSamonthewaterfrontthismorninghadbeenarare
breakfromsendingoffforms,answeringendlessquestions,establishinganaccountatthebankandgoingthroughcatalogsforsupplies.Everythingseemedtotakealotlongerthanshe’danticipated.Shewasinthesmalloffice
she’dcarvedoutforherselfinwhathadoncebeenawalk-incoatclosetandhadjusthungupthetelephoneafterdealing
withyetanotherrequestforinformationshethoughtshe’dalreadysupplied—intriplicate,infact—whenConnorwanderedintocheckontheprogress.Sincehislawofficewasjustupthestreet,hisvisitswereprettymuchdaily.Sowerethoseofalmosteveryoneelseinthefamily,especiallysincehergrandfatherhadassignedoneofhiscrewstodothe
renovationsshewanted.Today,though,she
suddenlyrealizedsomethingwasdifferent.Connorhadanenvelopeinhishandandacat-that-swallowed-the-canarysparkinhiseyes.“Isthatit?”sheasked
excitedly.“AmIlegal?”“Mostly,”hetoldher,
handingoverthepaperwork.“Therewillbeafinalinspectiononceallthework
inhereisfinished,butyou’vepassedallthescreenings.ThestateofMarylandhasdeemedyoufittobetrustedwithchildren.”Shegrinnedathim.“You
soundsurprised.ItoldyouIwasneverinanylegaltrouble.Imighthavegottenintoalotofmischiefovertheyears,butInevercrossedaline.Andunlikesomepeoplewecouldprobablyname,
GrandpaMickneverhadtostepinandcleanupanyofmymesses.”Connorscowledather.
“Hey,IhadonespeedingticketwhenIwasjustateenager.That’sit.”Hergrinspread.“Butit
wasinGrandpaMick’sprizedclassicMustang,whichyoudidnothavepermissiontodrive,asIrecall.”
Heruncle’sscowldeepened.“Mymotherobviouslyhasabigmouth.Shewassupposedtotakethatsecrettohergrave.”Carrielaughed.“Afraid
not.Weallheardthestory.GrandmaMeganseemstoenjoysharingit,especiallywhensheknowsitwillgetGrandpaMickallriledup.”“Let’sstayfocusedon
business,notmymisdeeds,
okay?”Connorgrumbledinawaythatremindedherofjusthowmuchhe’dmaturedfromthoserebelliousteenyears.“Finewithme,”Carrie
said,fightingforamoreseriousexpression.“Whenwereyouhopingto
open?”“GrandpaMicksayshis
crewswillbeoutofherebytheendofSeptember.Allthefurnitureandsuppliesare
scheduledforthefollowingweek.I’dsayweshouldbereadyforthatfinalinspectionbymid-October,orNovember1atthelatest.I’vealreadyhadinquiriesfromafewpeopleaboutwhetherI’llbeopenintimetoacceptkidsforthefallschoolholidayperiodsthatparentscan’talwaysgetofffromwork.AndIhaveahalfdozennamesoffamilieslookingfor
apermanentplacefortheirtoddlersthat’sclosertohome.”“Youhaven’tguaranteed
anything,haveyou?”“Ofcoursenot.I’vetold
themI’llcalltheminuteIhaveallthenecessaryapprovals.Iwanttobecarefulnottotakeontoomanychildrenatonce.Withmebeingnewtothisandanewstaff,Ican’triskus
beingoverwhelmedandmakingmistakes.Tobehonest,I’dbehappyenoughtogetopenbytheendoftheyearonceI’vefinishedmyclassesandgotteninafewmoreweeksofworkingwithJulie.”Connornodded
approvingly.“Smartthinking.”Carriecouldn’tseemto
stopasmilefromspreading
acrossherface.“Connor,thisisreallygoingtohappen,isn’tit?”“Looksthatway.”His
expressionsuddenlyturnedworried.“Youaren’tgoingtopanicandchangeyourmind,areyou?”Thiswasaboutthetenth
memberofthefamilytoaskherthesamequestionthisweekalone.Shewasoutofpatiencewithit.“Howflighty
doyouallthinkIam?Howmanytimeswereyouaskedifyouweresureaboutgoingtolawschool?IdoubtanybodyquestionedmymomaboutgoingtoworkonWallStreet.”Connorgaveheran
incredulouslook.“Areyoukiddingme?EvenafterI’dgraduatedfromlawschoolandgonetoworkinBaltimore,thefamilywasall
overmeforchoosingdivorcelaw.NobodywasveryhappywithmeuntilI’dmovedmypracticedownhere.AndyourmomchosetoworkinNewYorkinitially.Thatcauseditsownsortofruckus.Let’snotforgetKevindecidingtogotoworkforUncleThomas,whichsetmydad’steethonedge.OrBreegoingofftoChicagotobeaplaywright,whichisnotexactlyastable
profession.Thisfamilyisincrediblysupportive,buttheydon’thesitatetonudgeandmaneuverandspeaktheirmindsuntilwe’relivingaccordingtosomegrandplanDadhasinmindforus.”Carriewinced.“Iseeyour
point.Thisjustseemsreallypersonal.”Helaughed.“Well,of
courseitdoes.It’sfocusedonyou.Justrememberthatin
yourcase,they’renotjustaskingbecausetheythinkyoumadethewrongchoice.They’reaskingtogiveyouanopeningtochangeyourmind.O’Briensmaypushandprodtogetanyofustogoinaparticulardirection,butthebottomlineisalltheyreallycareaboutiswhetherwe’rehappy.Ittookmeawhiletograspthatmyself,especiallysincelivinginChesapeake
ShoresonceMomcamebackwasnotpartofmylifeplan.”Shestudiedhim.“No
regretsnow,though,right?”“Notaone.Andallofmy
issueswithMomleavingyearsagoareinthepast.Imaynevertotallyunderstandherchoices,butI’vestoppedreactinglikeanimmaturekid.She’sactuallyaprettygreatpersonandshe’sreallypulledthroughforHeatherandme
morethanonce.”Carrieknewhowhardher
grandmotherhadworkedtomakeamendsforleavingGrandpaMickandmovingtoNewYork,leavingherchildrentoberaisedbyhimandNell.Everyoneinthefamilyhadfinallymadepeacewiththatdifficulttime.“I’mgladyou’vemoved
on,”shetoldheruncle.Heshrugged.“Itwaspast
time.Howaboutyou?AnyregretsaboutnotgoingbacktoEuropeorNewYork?”Sheshookherhead
withoutamoment’shesitation.“Iknowthisisright.Iknowit’sgoingtomakemehappy,”Carriesaidwithcertainty.ShewasconvincedenoughtogorightonignoringallofMarc’stextsandvoicemails.“Thengivethefamilysix
months,showthemhowdeliriouslycontentyouare,andthey’llallbeclaimingitwastheiridea,”Connorsaid.Carrielaughed.Hewas
right.Takingcredit,evenfordecisionsthey’ddiscouragedthatturnedoutokay,wasdefinitelytheO’Brienway.
18
Thoughhe’dhadnoexperiencedealingwiththem,SamhadheardplentyabouttheterribletwoswhenBobbyhadbeenthatage.Laurelhadcalledfromtimetotimeintears,becauseherstubbornsonseemedtoknowonlyone
word,no,saidemphaticallyinresponsetoanythingsheaskedofhim.TonightitseemedBobby
hadrevertedtothosedaysorsomethingveryclosetoit.WhenSamaskedhimtopickuphisnewtoysthathadbeenleftscatteredalloverthelivingroomfloor,Bobbyscowledathim,turnedhisbackandranfromtheroom.Sinceitwasthefirsttime
he’dbeenopenlydefiantinquitethisway,Samwasshocked.“Youngman,comeback
here,”hecommandedinwhathethoughtsoundedlikeasufficientlyparentaltone.Bobbykeptrighton
running,hisfootstepsechoingonthehardwoodfloors.Whenheevidentlyreachedhisroom,heslammedthatdoorbehindhim.
Samstaredafterhimindismay.Workingtokeepareinonhisowntemper,hetookadeepbreath,walkeddownthehallandopenedthedoor.Heknewheneededtogetanexplanationbeforetacklingtheboy’sintolerablebehavior.Thiswasthefirsttimehe’dfelttheneedtoestablishsomebasicgroundrules.ItwasareminderthatBobby,forallofhisgood
traits,wasstillalittleboyinneedofthekindofguidanceSamwasn’tsurehewasqualifiedtogive.Bobbywassittingonthe
floorwithhisnewTransformers,listlesslymovingthemaround.Hedidn’tgiveSamsomuchasaglance.Samwantedtoscreamatthekidandremindhimwhowasthebossaroundhere,butsomethinginthe
dejectedsetofBobby’sshoulderskepthimfromdoingthat.Instead,hesatonthefloornexttohim.Afterseveralminutesof
continuedsilence,whichgavebothofthemtimetocalmdownandthink,heasked,“Okay,pal,talktome.What’sup?”Bobbycontinuedto
pretendSamwasn’teventhere.WhenSamtouchedhis
shoulder,Bobbyjerkedaway.EventhoughSamremindedhimselfthatthekidwasinsomesortofturmoil,hewassurprisedbyjusthowmuchtherejectionhurt.“Howwasschooltoday?”
Samasked,searchingforsomelogicalexplanationforBobby’smood.Abaddayatschoolwasthefirstthingthatcametomind.Hecouldrecallafewofthoseinhisown
past.Hedrewashrugin
response,whichwasbetterthanbeingignored,butnotexactlyilluminating.“Didyouhaveatest?”Sam
persisted.FailingaspellingtestorgettingamathproblemwronginfrontoftheclassmightseemdevastatingtoakidBobby’sage.Ordidtheyevenhavethosesortoftestsinfirstgrade?Ithadbeena
verylongtimesinceSamhadstartedschool.Samgotnothingin
response.“Atleastrecessmusthave
beenfun.Ordidyoufalldown?Skinyourknee?”Again,nothing.Sambit
backasigh.“Didyourteacherreadto
youtoday?Iknowyoulikethat.”Bobby’sscowldeepened
andtearsleakedoutandtrickleddownhischeeks.“It’snotaboutschool,okay?”heblurtedfinally.“Leavemealone.”Saminchedcloser,but
didn’treachout.“Sorry,buddy.Ican’tdothat.Iknowyou’reupsetaboutsomething.Rememberwhatwedecidedwhenyoufirstcametotown?”Bobbysniffed,butkepthis
gazedowncast.“What?”“Thatwe’reateam,”Sam
remindedhim.“ThatmeansI’myourbackup,soifsomethingorsomebodymakesyoufeelbad,I’mheretohelp.”“Youcan’tfixthis,”Bobby
saidwearily,clearlyresignedtosufferingalone.HisattitudemadeSam
wanttocry.Nosix-year-oldshouldbefeelingthis
defeated.“Fixwhat?MaybeIcan’t,butyouhavetotellmesoIcanatleasttry.”Bobbygavehimawhat’s-
the-pointlook,butwhenSamcontinuedtowaitforareply,hefinallysaid,“Grandmacalled.”“That’snice,”Samsaid
carefully.UsuallycallsfromhisgrandparentsperkedupBobby’sspirits,butclearlytherehadbeensomething
differentaboutthisone.“Whatdidshehavetosay?”Theforlornexpressionthat
washedoverBobby’sfaceoncemoremadeSamwanttocry.“ShesaiditwasDaddy’s
birthdayandaskedmewhatIwasdoingtocelebrate.”HeturnedtoSam,tearsstreamingnow.“ButIwasn’tdoinganything,becauseIforgot.”
ThistimewhenSamreachedouttogatherBobbyclose,theboypracticallythrewhimselfintoSam’sarms,hisshouldersshakingashesobbed.Samfeltlikejoiningin,lettinggooftheemotionsthathe’dkeptmostlyburiedeversincetheaccident.Instead,hefocusedonBobby,whowasclingingtohimasifhewasafraidtoletgo.
“It’sokay,”hesoothed,eventhoughheknewnothingwouldeverbetotallyokayagain.SamwishedRobert’s
motherwereheresohecouldgiveherapieceofhismind,butrationallyheknewshe’donlyreachedouttohergrandsonasawaytofeelconnectedtohersononadayshecouldnolongercelebratewithRobert.Shehadn’t
meanttomakeBobbyfeelbadforforgetting.Heck,evensheprobablyknewthatBobbycouldbarelyrememberwherehe’dkickedoffhisshoesthenightbefore,muchlessimportantdates.“Ididn’tmeantoforget,”
Bobbywhisperedbrokenly.“Itdoesn’tmeanI’veforgottenmydad.”“Iknow,pal.And,believe
me,yourgrandmother’snot
madatyou.She’sprobablyjustfeelingalittlesadtoday.Youknow,thewayyoufeelsometimeswhenyouthinkaboutyourdadoryourmomandrealizeyoucan’tseethem.”Hischeeksstilldamp,
BobbygaveSamahopefullook.“CouldwedosomethingforDad’sbirthday?It’snottoolate,isit?”
“Itisdefinitelynottoolate,”Samsaid,makingaspontaneousdecisiontomakethisright.This,thankgoodness,wasthesortofproblemhecouldhandle.“Carrie’scomingoverinalittlewhile.She’sbringingpeachesandicecreamfordessert.Whydon’tIaskifshecanpickupsomecupcakesandsomebirthdaycandles?”
ThesparkreturnedtoBobby’seyes.“Sometimespeoplehaveballoonsandletthemfloatintotheair,sopeoplecanseethemfromheaven.Couldwedothat,too?”“I’llchecktoseeif
anyplaceisstillopenthatsellsballoonswithheliuminthem,”Sampromised.“Howdoesthatsound?Andwe’lltakepictureswiththecell
phoneandsendthemtoyourgrandmother.Ithinkitwillmakehersmiletoseehowwe’vecelebratedyourdad’sbirthday.”“Allright!”Bobby
enthusedwiththefistpumpSamhadconcludedalwaysaccompaniedhissolidapprovalforanyplan.“Now,whileIcallCarrie
andgettheballrollingforthisbirthdaycelebration,why
don’tyoupickupthosetoyssoshedoesn’ttriponthemandfallonherfacewhenshewalksinthedoor?”“Okay,”Bobbysaid
agreeablyandracedoff.Samstayedwherehewas
anddrewinadeepbreath.He’davertedonecrisis,buthowmanyhundredsmorewouldtherebelikeit?WashereallyuptoprovidingthesupportthatBobbyneeded?
“Nochoice,”heremindedhimselffirmly.“We’reateam.”Thatwasthepromisehe’d
madeandhehadeveryintentionofdoingwhateverwasrequiredtokeepit.Ascrazyasitseemed,itappearedheandhisnephewwouldbegrowinguptogether.
***
WhenSamtoldCarriewhathadhappened,sheaddedafewextrathingstohershoppinglist.FortunatelyEthel’sEmporiumwasalwayswellstockedwithbirthdaysupplies.Shefoundballoons,abannerthatspelledoutHappyBirthdayincolorfullettersalongwithbirthdaypaperplates,matchingbowlsforicecreamandnapkins.Sheevenfound
asillypairofsunglassesforBobbythathadbirthdaycandlesandwishesontheframe.“DidImissabirthday?”
Ethelasked.“Iusuallyknowwhenone’scomingupbecausehalfyourfamilyisinherebuyingupmostofmystock.”“Longstory,”Carriesaid.
“Butit’snotforanO’Brienthistime.”
“Iimaginetherearegoingtobequiteafewbirthdaypartiesinyourfuture,”Ethelsaid,backingofffromhernaturaltendencytoasktoomanyquestions.“Seemstomeadaycarewillprobablybehavingpartiesonaregularbasis.”CarrieregardedEthelwith
surpriseassherecognizedthevalidityofherstatement,thenimmediatelyduginherpurse
forhercellphone.Sheaddedanothernotetoherlongto-dolist,thenmetEthel’scuriousgaze.“Addingareminder,”sheexplained.“DoIneedtofindasupplierorcouldweworksomethingout?”Ethelbeamedather.“I
wasn’tanglingtomakeasale,butI’mhappytohelpout.I’llgetyouanythingyouneedandgiveyouaproperdiscount,too.Yourfamily
practicallykeepsmeinbusiness.Icandothistoreturnthefavor.”“Iknowweshopinherea
lot,butit’sthetouristswhokeepthistownafloateconomically,”Carriesaid.“I’veseenformyselfhowmanybagstheycarryoutofhereonanygivenday.”“Onanygivensummer
day,”Ethelcorrected,thenpaused,herexpression
thoughtfulassheapparentlyconsideredherbusinesstrends.“Okay,andmaybeinthespringandfall,butit’sthelocalswhoseetoitImakeitthroughthewinter.I’mnotlikelytoforgetthat.Ithelpsthatyourgranddaddyisinheremosteverydaybuyingabigsackofpennycandyforallthekidshespoils.”Carrielaughed.“CaitandI
werethefirstbeneficiariesof
that.BetweenhimandTrace,it’sawonderourteethdidn’trot.”“Well,youandyourtwin
stillhavethoseprettysmiles,soitdidn’tdoeitherofyouanyharm.Iimaginetheothergrandchildrenandgreat-grandchildrenwilldojustfinewithallthatsugar,too.”SheputCarrie’spurchasesintoabag,thentiedahalfdozenribbonsaroundher
wristtokeeptheballoonsfromsailingaway.“Haveagoodtime
tonight,”Ethelcalledafterher.Ethel’swordslingeredas
Carrieleftthestore.ShethoughtofwhatSamhadinmindfordessert.Maybetheywouldn’tquitegettothat,giventheirpint-sizechaperone,buttheappetizerleadinguptoitpromisedto
besuperb.
***
Tearsforgotten,BobbywasbouncingwithexcitementbythetimeCarriearrivedontheirdoorstepladendownwithbags.ToBobby’sunmistakabledelight,shehadabunchofcolorfulballoonsonlong,matchingribbons.“You’dbettertietheseto
thebackofachairorsomething,”sheadvisedSamwhenshehandedthemover.“Otherwise,they’llbeontheceilingwhenitcomestimetoreleasethem.”ShegrinnedatBobby.“Isthatwhatyouhadinmind—lettingthemgo,sothey’dfloatintotheskywhereyourdadcanseethem?”Bobbynodded.“Won’t
thatbecool?”
“Itwillbeamazing.”Shebrushedhishairbackfromhisforehead,thetendergestureremindingSamthatBobbywasinneedofahaircut,somethingelsehe’dforgottenabout.“Andyou’resosweettohavethoughtofit.”Sambitbackachuckleas
Bobbymadeanexaggeratedgaggingsound.“Notsweet?”Carrieasked
innocently.“Howaboutawesome?Incredible?Stupendous?”Bobby’sexpression
falteredatthelastsuggestion.“Idon’tknowwhatthatonemeans.”“Itmeansamazing.”Hissmilecameback.
“Cool.”“Let’sseewhatelsewe
haveherefortheparty,”Samsaidashestartedpoking
throughthebags.“Cupcakeswithchocolatefrosting.”“Theverybestkind,”
Bobbysaid.“Daddylovedchocolate.That’swhathealwayswantedforhisbirthday.”Carriestudiedhim.“Is
chocolateokayforyou,too?”“Ilovechocolate,”he
confirmed.Shenoddedwithevident
satisfaction.“Ihadafeeling
aboutthat.”“Candles,plates,and
what’sthis?”Samdrewapairofbrightlycoloredbirthdaysunglassesfromthebag.“Who’swearingthese?Notme,Ihope,”hesaid,evenasheputthemon.Bobbydoubledoverwith
giggles.“Youlooksilly.”Carriesmiled.“Ithinkthey
makeyoulookveryhandsome.Noteveryguyis
manenoughtocarryoffthatstyle.”Samfelthisheartflipover
justalittleattheteasing.“Andyou,Ms.FashionExpert,thinkIam?”heasked,holdinghergaze.“Definitely.”Somethingwarmand
almosttangibleshimmeredintheairbetweenthemuntilBobbycutinimpatiently.“IthinkIshouldgetto
weartheglasses,”hesaid.Samfeignedreluctanceas
heremovedthem.“Isupposesincethispartyisforyourdad,youprobablyshouldgettoweartheglasses,butit’sgoingtobereallyhardformetopartwiththem.”Bobbylookedasifhe
weren’tquitesureifSamwasserious.Eventuallyheseemedtoconcludehemightbe.“Youcanhavethemback
whentheparty’sover.”“Thanks,pal,”Samsaid.
“Nowlet’sgetthispartystartedbeforeitgetsdarkout.Bobby,helpCarrieputtheicecreaminthefreezer,sowedon’twindupeatingvanillasoup.”“Yuck!”Bobbysaid,
grabbingherhandandpullinghertowardthekitchen.Astheypassedcloseby,
Samleanedtowardherand
whispered,“Iamreally,reallylookingforwardtodessert.”Shegavehimablandlook,
eventhoughhereyesweretwinkling.“Iintendtosavoreverybiteofthemaincourse.”Bobbygavethetwoof
themanoddlook.“Iwanteverything,”hedeclared.“Thengetthaticecream
putawayandlet’sgetthe
grillfiredupfortheburgers.Thebutteredcornisreadytogoon,too.Theguyatthefarmstandsaysit’saboutthelastoftheSilverQueenvarietyforthisyear.Bringthesaladwithyouwhenyoucomeout.Bottlesofdressingareinthedoorofthefridge.”TwentyminuteslaterSam
andCarriewereeatingcheeseburgerswiththickslicesoftomato,whileBobby
ateahotdog,alast-minutesubstitutioninthemenu.Samhadcutthegrilledcobsofcornintomanageable,sweetlydeliciousbite-sizesections.“BestburgerI’vehadall
summer,”Carriedeclared.“Ithoughtyourfamilyhad
bigbarbecuesallthetime,”Samsaid.“Oristhatjustwishfulthinkingonmypart?”“Oh,no.GrandpaMick
considershimselfkingofthegrill.He’sinhisgloryatourannualFourthofJulycelebration,thebiggestfamilyeventoftheyearasidefromChristmasandThanksgiving.Unfortunately,he’seasilydistracted,sowesometimesgetvery,verywell-donehamburgers,andthat’sbeingkind.”Shetookanotherbiteofhercheeseburger,closedhereyes
andsighed.“These,however,areperfect.”“Amazing,considering
howeasilyyoucandistractme,”Samsaid.“That’swhyIstayedbusy
insideforsolong,”Carrieclaimed,grinning.“Ifyouthinkaboutit,Ididnotappearuntilyou’dputtheseburgersontotheirbuns.”“Soweowethesuccessof
mycookingtoyour
forethoughtandconsideration?”heasked,laughing.Shenoddedsolemnly.“I
thinkso.”“Whenarewegonnahave
cupcakesandicecream?”Bobbyasked,hismouthfullofhotdog.“Whenyoufinisheating,”
Samtoldhim.“Swallow,please,beforeyouspeak.”“Oh,yeah,”Bobbysaid,
thenmadeashowofchewing.Heputtherestofthehotdogonhisplate.“I’mdone.”Carriestoodup.“Okay,
then.Icecreamandcupcakescomingup.”“I’llhelpyougetthem,”
Samsaid,standingtofollowher.Inside,hemovedclose,
turnedheraroundandtiltedherchin,thenclaimedher
lips.“I’vebeenwantingtodothatsinceyougothere,”hesaid,evenashereluctantlytookastepback.“Butthat’sprobablygoingtohavetoholdme.GivenBobby’simpatience,hecouldwalkinhereanysecond.”“Goodthinking,”Carrie
said.“Butjustsoyouknow,it’sbeenonmymind,too.”“That’sencouraging.”
Whensheturnedandwould
havereachedouttoopenthefreezerdoor,heputhishandoverhers.“Carrie,arewecrazy?”“Whatdoyoumean?”“You’reinthemiddleof
thislife-alteringcareerchange.I’manovernightsingledad.Areeitherofusinanypositiontomakeourlivesmorecomplicated?”“Idon’tknow,”shesaid
softly.“ButIknowwhatmy
grandmotherwouldsay.”“What’sthat?”“Thatlovedoesn’talways
comealongwhenit’sconvenient.”Nosoonerhadthewordsleftherlipsthansheblushed.“Notthatwe’retalkingaboutlove,ofcourse.Thisislust,right?That’sallitis.”Shesoundedsodesperate,
Sambarelyresistedlaughing.“Areyouaskingmeortelling
me?”“Ihonestlydon’tknow.
Howaboutyou?Whatdoyouthinkisgoingon?”BeforeSamcouldanswer,
Bobbyburstintothekitchen.“What’stakingsolong?”Samdrewinadeepbreath.
“We’llbethereinaminute.Whydon’tyougettheballoonsfromthediningroom.Hangontight,though,andI’lltiethemtosomething
outsideassoonasIgetthere.”“Hurryup!”Bobby
commandedexcitedly.“It’sgonnabetoodarktosee’emfloatawayprettysoon.”Asheranoff,Samonce
againturnedCarrietofacehim.“Tobecontinued,”heassuredher,thentouchedhercheekwithaquickcaress.“That’sapromise.”“Agreed.”
Bobbychosethatmomenttoracebackthrough,theballoonsclutchedtightlyinhishand.SamandCarriefollowedwithbowls,plates,icecream,cupcakesandcandles.Sampulledouthiscellphone,readytorecordtheimpromptuparty.AsBobbyhadreminded
them,thesunwassinkingtowardthehorizoninafinalburstofcolor.Carriequickly
litthecandlesonthecupcakesandtheyallmadewishesandblewthemout,thenBobbysolemnlyreleasedtheballoonsintotheair.“Happybirthday,Dad!”he
said,hisheadtilteduptofollowthepathoftheballoonsastheydriftedaway,brightspotsofred,blue,greenandpurpledottingthelaststreaksoforange-tintedsky.
Carriestartedsinging“HappyBirthday”andBobbyandSamchimedin.Nearlyoverwhelmedbythesweetpoignanceofthemoment,Samrecordeditallwithhiscellphone,thenshutitoffasthefinalnotesofthesongandthelastballoondriftedawayontheeveningbreeze.“Thatwasthebestbirthday
partyever!”Carriesaid,givingBobby’sshouldera
squeeze.“Iknowyourdadissohappyyouthoughtofit.”“Imisshim,”Bobby
whispered,thenreachedoutforSam’shand.“ButnowIhaveyou.”“That’sright,”Samsaid,
hisvoiceoddlychoked.“Nowyouhaveme.”Forbetterorworse.And
everysingleday,heintendedtopraylikecrazythatitwouldbeforthebestforthis
littleboywho’dlostsomuch.
***
ThecallfromtheschoolthemorningafterthebirthdaycelebrationcaughtSamcompletelyoffguard.Hewasuptohiseyeballswithtryingtocorrectaseriousglitchonthepaper’swebsitewhenthecounselorcalledtotellhimBobbyhadbeeninafighton
theplayground.He’dgottenasplitlip,whichtheschoolnursethoughtmightneedstitches.“What’swrong?”Mack
askedwhenhehungupthephone,obviouslyshaken.Samfilledhimin.“Ican’t
imagineBobbyinafight.Ihavetogo.Heneedstoseeadoctor.”“Go,”Macksaidatonce.“OrIcouldgethim,”Susie
offered.ShehadbroughtinlunchforthemsincecorrectingthetechproblemhadbothMackandSamtearingtheirhairout.SamhaddiscoveredthatSusiewasconvincedthatMackforgottoeatfartoooften.“JustcalltheschoolbackandtellthemIhavepermissiontopickhimup,thencallNoah’sofficeandtellthemit’sokaytotreathim.I’llbringhimbyhere
afterthat,soyoucanseeforyourselfhowhe’sdoing.”Samwassorelytemptedto
lethergo.“Idon’tknow...”Hehesitated,thinkingoftheboundariesthathadbarelybeenputintoplace.RelyingonSusie,eveninanemergencylikethisone,seemedrisky.Still,thiswebproblemneededtoberesolved.Susiegavehimalookthat
wasalmostpleading.“Please,letmedothis,Sam.Bobbyprobablyneedsamom’stouchrightnow.”Alarmedbyherchoiceof
words,SamglancedatMack,whogaveasubtleshakeofhishead.Thatwasenoughtoconvincehimhisinstincttodothishimselfwasright.“I’vegotit,”hesaid,
standingup.“Thanksfortheoffer,Susie,buthe’sboundto
bescared.Besides,Ineedtogettothebottomofwhatthefightwasaboutinthefirstplace.”Susielookedasifshewas
abouttoprotest,butMackreachedforherhandandgaveherapointedlook.“Go,”Macktoldhim.“I’llbebackassoonasI
can,”Sampromised.“HereareacoupleofthingsyoumighttrywhileI’mgone.I
thinkweweregettingclosetofixingtheproblem.”“Don’tworryaboutit.
FocusonwhatBobbyneeds,”Macksaid.Samhadahunchthiswas
yetanotherofthosetestsofparenthood,andforjustaminutethere,he’dalmostfailedit.
***
MacksteeledhimselfforafightwithhiswifeasSamleftthenewspaperoffice.“Whydidyoudothat?”
Susieimmediatelydemanded.“IcouldhavetakenBobbytothedoctor.”“Ofcourseyoucould
have,”Mackagreedreasonably.“Butitwasn’tyourplace.”“Afriendcan’tstepinto
help?”
Macksighed.“Sweetheart,ifIthoughtitwasnothingmorethanafriendlygesture,I’dhavegonealongwithit,butitwasmorethanthatandwebothknowit.SodoesSam.”Susiescowledathim.
“Suchas?”“Yousaidityourself.You
thoughtBobbyneededamother’stouch.You’renothismother.”
“Iknowthat.”Mackheldhergazeand
thistimeheknewhecouldnolongerdancearoundtheissueinanattempttoprotecthiswife’sfeelings.“Doyoureally?I’veseenhowyouarewithBobby.I’veseenthelonginginyoureyes.Ihavetowondersometimesifyou’renothopingSamwilldecidebeingadadistoomuchtrouble,sowecanstep
in.”“That’saterriblethingto
say!”shesaid,butshewastremblingandthesadlookinhereyestoldtherealstory.“Canyoudenyit?”Mack
askedgently.Hesawhowmuchshe
wantedto,butSusieneverhadbeenverygoodatlying,eventoherself.“Okay,no,Ican’tdenyit,”
sheconcededwearily.“On
someawful,selfishlevel,Ithinkthatchilddeservestwoparentswhowouldloveandnourishhimthewaywecould.”“Sam’sdoinghisbest.And
todayisachanceforhimtotakeonemorestepalongthedifficultlearningcurveofbeingaparent.Youmighthavebeenabletohandlethesituation,butintheend,SamhastofilltheroleofBobby’s
dadandweneedtogivehimthatchance.”TearsspilleddownSusie’s
cheeks.“You’reright.Iknowyouare.”Mackstoodupandclosed
thedoortohisoffice,thenpulledhiswifeontohislap.“Suze,Iknowhowbadlyyouwantachild,”hesaid,holdinghertightandbrushingthetearsfromhercheeks.“Iwantthatforyou,
forus.Anditwillhappenwhenthetimeisright.IfIcouldmakeithappentoday,Iwould.”“Iknow,”shewhispered,
restingherheadonhisshoulder.“I’msorryIgetsocrazy.AndI’msorryIkeepdoingthingsthatnecessitatemyapologizingtoyou,toCarrie,topracticallyeveryoneinmyfamily.SometimesIthinkthisisthe
onlythinginmyentirelifethatmatters,eventhoughwhenI’mrationalIrecognizethatIhavesomuchtobethankfulfor.”ShegazedintoSam’seyeswithregret.“I’msorryifImakeyoufeelasifyoudon’tmatterenough.”“Comeon,sweetheart,”
Mackchided.“It’snotaboutme.Iknowthat.”Shesighedheavily.“Ihope
so,becauseIdoloveyou
morethananything.”“Andwearegoingtoget
throughthis,”hesaid,prayingitwasapromisehecouldkeep.
19
SamfoundBobbyinthenurse’soffice,holdingabandagetohislip,abruisealreadyformingunderhiseye.“Hey,buddy,”Samsaid,
sittingdownnexttohim.“You’vegotquiteashiner
comingon.How’dthathappen?”Thesix-year-oldregarded
himwithstoicsilence.Thenursegavehimashrugsuggestingthatsheknewnomorethanhedidaboutwhateverhadcausedthefight.“Let’sgetovertothe
doctor’sofficeandlethimtakealookatyourlip,”Samsuggested.“That’sapretty
badcut.”FearsparkedinBobby’s
eyes.“Willhehavetouseaneedle?”“Hemight,”Samtoldhim
honestly.Bobbycrossedhisarms
overhischest.“No!”“Buddy,wehavetoletthe
doctordecideanddowhateverhethinksisbest.”“No!”Bobbyrepeated.Samcastahelplesslookat
thenurse.ShesatdownonBobby’sotherside.“Youknowhe’llgiveyou
somethingsoitwon’thurt,”shetoldhimgently.“Andtherumoristhathehaslollipopsforhisbravestpatients.”“Gram’paMickhascandy,
too,”Bobbysaid,asifthedoctor’sofferingweren’tallthatspecial.“ButGrandpaMickcan’t
fixupyourcut,”Sam
remindedhim.Bobbyseemedtobe
consideringthetruthofthat.“I’llgoifCarriecomes,too,”hesaidfinally,startlingSam.“Ithinkthisissomething
youandIcanhandle,”Samtoldhim,determinedtoholdhisground.Hewasn’tsurewhyhewassoinsistent,butitseemedimportanttoprove,ifonlytohimself,thathecouldcareforBobbyonhisown.
Bobby’sexpressionturnedevendarker.“No!IwantCarrie.”Asbadlyashewantedto
stayfirm,Samconcludedthiswasn’tthetimeorplaceforanargument.“I’llcallCarriewhenwegetinthecarandaskhertomeetusthere,”heconceded.“Ifshe’sfreeandcloseby,she’llbetherewhenwegetthere.How’sthat?”“Iguessthat’sokay,”
Bobbyrelented.AfewminuteslaterCarrie
metthematthedoctor’soffice,whichwasinthesameblockashernewbusiness.ShegaveBobbyareassuringhug,thenglancedcuriouslyatSamasBobbydriftedofftowardaselectionoftoysinthewaitingroom.“Whenyoucalled,it
almostsoundedasifyouweren’tsureI’dcome,”she
saidquietly.“Youhavealotgoingon
rightnow.Iwasn’tevensureifyou’dbeintown.Ididn’twanttodragyouallthewaybackfromJulie’s.”“NothingIhavetodois
moreimportantthanthis,”shesaid,regardinghimcuriously.AfterglancingdowntomakesurethatBobby’sattentionwasfocusedonsomeLEGOsin
thewaiting-roomplayarea,shesaid,“Didn’tyouwantmehere?Ifthat’sit,whydidyoubothercalling?”Samsighed.“It’sjustthatI
relyonyoualot,mostrecentlylastnight,tobailmeoutofyetanothertightspot.”“Theimpromptubirthday
party?”shesaidincredulously.“Thatwasfun.Itwasn’tanimposition.Sam,IknowyouandIhavea
wholelotofthingsweneedtofigureout.”“Oneofthethingswe
agreedtowasthatwedidn’twanttoconfuseBobbywhilewewerefiguringouttherest,”heremindedher.“True,butIthoughtwe
werefriends.Friendsstepupinabind,nomatterwhatelsemightbegoingon.”Samsuddenlyfelt
ridiculousformakingtoo
muchoutofthis.Hadhewantedtousethisincidenttoprovehewasuptothetaskoffatherhood?Nowwasn’tthetimeforhispridetokickin.Sincehedidn’twanttoadmittothat,hesaid,“ButBobbyisn’tyourresponsibility.”Carrieheldhisgazefora
verylongtime,disappointmentinhereyes.“Oneofthesedaysweneedtotalkaboutthedifference
betweenresponsibilityandcaringenoughtobearoundforthepeoplewelove,”shesaid.“Ifyoudon’tgetthat,thenmaybeweshouldn’tevenconsideranythingmore.”BeforeSamcouldsaya
wordinhisowndefense—assumingheevenhadone—NoahMcIlroycameoutofthebacktogetBobbyandthemomentended,leavingSam
moreshakenthanhe’dbeeninalongtime.NoteventhecallfromtheschoolhadgottentohimthesamewaythatCarrie’squietlyspokenrebukehad.
***
Bobbyisn’tyourresponsibility.TheentiretimeCarriewas
intheexaminingroom,
BobbyclutchingherhandtightlyasNoahputtwostitchesintohislip,shewasfightingthehurtthathadspreadthroughheratSam’scomment.Howcouldtheypossiblyhavebeensocloselastnight,onlytohavehimuttersuchcarelesswordstoday?She’dthoughtthey’dbeenmakingrealprogresstowardsomethingmeaningful,andinasplit
second,he’ddestroyedthatillusionandputherinherplace.ShewasawareofNoah
studyinghercuriously,butknewhewouldneveraskthequestionsthatweresoclearlyonhismind,suchaswhyshewasherewithBobbyorwhysheandSamcouldn’tevenlookeachotherintheeye.“Goodjob!”Noahtold
Bobbywhenhewasfinished.
“Youwereverybrave.”“Thenurseatschoolsaid
youmighthavelollipops,”Bobbysaidhopefully.Noahchuckled.“Ido,
indeed.”Hepulledacartonwithanassortmentofflavorsfromoneofthedrawers.“Nowhere’sthedeal.Itmightbebestifyoudon’teatthisrightnow.Yourlip’sgoingtobenumbforalittlebitlongerandyoudon’twant
todribblealloveryourself.Canyousavethistilltomorrow?”“Tomorrow?”Bobby
repeatedasifitwereaneternityuntilthen.“Butbytonight,Ithink
perhapsyoucouldhaveaPopsicle,”Noahofferedasaconsolation.“Maybeeventwo.Theicewouldfeelrealgoodonyourlip.”BobbyturnedtoSam.“Can
wegetsome?”“I’llstopatthestore,”Sam
promised.“Icouldtakehimhome,
whileyoudothat,”Carrieoffered,thencouldn’tseemtostopherselffromadding,“UnlessI’dbeoverstepping.”Samwincedatherwords.
Noahlookedevenmoreintrigued.CarriesimplystoodthereandwaitedtoseewhatSamwouldsay.
“Ifyouhavethetime,thatwouldbegreat,”hesaid.“I’llgiveBobbyasmall
doseofchildren’sTylenolbeforeyouleave,”Noahsaid.“He’llprobablysleepforawhilethisafternoon.Youcangivehimmorelaterifhe’sinpain,butasbraveasheis,heshouldbejustfine.BringhimbacknextweekandI’llremovethestitches.Callorstopbyifyouhaveany
questionsorifanythingdoesn’tseemright.”“Thanks,”Samsaid,
shakinghishand.“Iappreciateyourseeingusonshortnotice.”“Hey,playgroundwar
woundsalwaysgetpriorityaroundhere,”Noahtoldhim.Carrieaddedherown
thanks.“How’stheday-carecenter
coming?”Noahaskedher.
“AllIneedarethefinalinspectionapprovalsandwe’llbereadytoopen.Afewmoreweeksshoulddoit,”shesaid,hopingheroptimismwasn’tmisplaced.“Great.I’llhaveJackson
thereondayone.MaybeyoucangiveCaitandmeatourwhenshe’shomethisweekend.”“Absolutely,”Carrie
promised,thoughshehada
hunchthattheyweregoingtobefarmoreinterestedinherrelationshipwithSamthantheywereintheselectionoftoysandthecolorschemeathernewenterprise.Outside,Samhandedhera
housekey.“ThanksfortakingBobbyhome.I’llbethereasquicklyaspossible,soyoucangetbacktowork.”“Sure,”shesaid,barely
resistingthedesiretostarta
fightwithhimabouthisattitudetowardherinvolvement.He’dcalledher,blastitall.Andshewasn’tSusie,likelytomisconstruewhathisrequestmeant.“We’llseeyouatthehouse.”Inthebackseatofhercar
withhisseatbelton,Bobby’seyelidswerealreadydroopingfromtheday’sexcitement.Whenshepulledtoastopinfrontofthehouse,though,his
eyesblinkedopen.“We’rehome,”shesaid,
walkingquicklyaroundtohelphimgetout.“Youfeelingsteadyonyourfeet?”“Uh-huh,”hesaid,then
wobbledalittle.Stillhelookedindignant
whensheofferedtocarryhim.“Icanwalk,”hesaid,thenheadedunsteadilyforthefrontdoor.Carrieopenedit,thentook
himstraighttohisroom.Sheremovedhisshoesandhelpedhimontothebed.Hiseyeswereclosedbythetimehisheadhitthepillow.Shesatnexttohim,herheartachingasshebrushedhishairfromhisforehead.Longlashesthatgirlswouldonedayenvybrushedhischeeks.Hissweetlittlemouthwasswollenandredandtherewasalreadyabruiseunderoneeye.
“Whatonearthwereyoufightingabout?”shemurmuredtoherselfasshewatchedtheriseandfallofhischest.ShewonderedifSamhadanyidea.Shewasstillsittingthere
whenSamgothome.Shetensedatthesoundofthefrontdoorclosing,thenmadeherselfgetupandgointothekitchenwherehewasputtingawaythePopsicles.
Heturnedslowlywhenshecameintotheroom.“Howishe?”“Downforthecount,”she
said,notingtherawanguishinhiseyes.“Areyouokay?”Heshookhishead.“When
Igotmyfirstlookathiminthenurse’soffice,Ithinkmyheartstopped.”“Getusedtoit,”she
advised,wishingshehadtherighttoputherarmsaround
himandoffercomfort.Lessthanadayago,shewouldhave.Nowshefeltentirelytoouncertainofherstatusaroundhere.“Littleboysarepronetocutsandscrapes.”“Andfights?Athisage?”“That’sprobablynotquite
astypical,”sheconceded,thoughshe’dmediatedseveralatJulie’sday-carecenterinvolvingboysnotmucholder.“Anyideawhat
onearthhewasfightingabout?”“None.Thenursehadno
ideaeitherandBobbywasn’ttalking.Ishouldprobablygivetheteacheracallnowthattheimmediatecrisisisoverandseewhatshehastosay.”Hepausedandmutteredacurseunderhisbreath.“IneedtocallMack,too.”“Heknowsaboutwhat’s
goingonalready,right?”
“Yes,butItookoffinthemiddleofawebsitecrash.Iwassupposedtocomebacktodealwithit.”“Thengo,”shesaidat
once.“Icanstayheretillyougethome.”Shesawanotherofthoseannoyinglooksthatsuggestedhedidn’twanttoinconvenienceher.“OrI’llstaytillyoucangetsomebodyelse,ifyoudon’twantmehere.”
Guiltdarkenedhiseyes.Hescrubbedhishandoverhisface.“Carrie,IamsosorryifI’vemadeyoufeelasifyouhavenoplacehere.I’mnotevensurewhyIletmyselfgetsocrazytoday.MaybeitwasbecauseSusiewastryingtotakeoverandIgotdefensiveaboutthat.ThenBobbywantedyouwithhim,notme,andIhaterelyingonyou,onanyone,rightnow.Ineedto
knowIcanhandlethisstuffonmyown,butthetruthisthatIcan’t.WhenIarrivedatthenurse’sofficeatschoolandsawthatblackeyeandsplitlip,Ifeltcompletelyhelpless.IwantedtoburstintotearsmyselfandcurseLaurelforputtingmeintothisposition.”Carriefeltthestartofher
tensioneasing.“Welcometoparenthood!Doyouthink
there’saparentonearthwhohasn’tfeltthatwaythefirsttimehisorherbabygetsacutorbruisethattheycouldn’tprevent?TheonlyadultIknowwhoseemstohandlethatwithcompleteaplombisGram.Nellhasseenmorethanhershareofinjuriesandcometoacceptthatthevastmajorityaremessy,butnotlife-threatening.She’sreallytheoneyouwantaroundina
crisis.Therestofusjustdothebestwecan.”ThecornersofSam’s
mouthlifted.“AreyousuggestingyouwereasscaredasIwas?”“Notsomuchscaredas
wantingtocrybecauseBobbywasinpain.”“Butyoudidn’t.”“Neitherdidyou,”she
remindedhim.“Youdideverythingjustright,Sam.
YouevencalledmewhenBobbyaskedforme,ratherthanmakinghimtoughitout.”Sheriskedtakingastep
closerandthistimeshedidputherhandonhischeek.“Youdidjustfine,Sam.”“Ihavetowonderifevery
dayisgoingtobringsomenewchallengethat’sgoingtomakemefeelcompletelyinept.”
“Morethanlikely,”shesaidcandidly.“Butthinkaboutlastnight.WhenBobbywassadandlost,youpulledtogetherexactlytherightsortofcelebrationofhisdad.Youmadeeverythingokayagain.”Samsighed.“Hismomand
dadaregone.Nothingwilleverbeokayagain.”“Itwon’tbethesame
again,”shecorrected.“Butitwillbeokay,becausehehas
you.”Shehesitated,thenadded,“Andme,ifyouwantmearound.”Hereachedforherthen
andpulledherintohisarms.Carrieacceptedtheembraceandtheapologythatwasinhisactions,ifnotexactlyinhiswords.“Iwantyouaround,”he
said.“MorethanIprobablyshould.You’regoingtogetsickofbeingmygo-to
person.”Carrietouchedafingerto
hislips.“Kissme.”Samlookedstartled,but
thenhebenthisheadandclaimedherlips.Likeadrowningman,heclungtoherandkissedheruntiltheywerebothbreathinghard.Whenhefinallypulled
away,Carriecaughtherbreath,thensmiled.“Therearesomedefiniteperksthat
gowithbeingthego-topersoninyourlife.”“It’snotnearlyenough
comparedtowhatIoweyou.”“Letmebethejudgeof
that.Nowgobacktowork.I’llbeherewhenyoucomehome.Ifwe’relucky,Bobbywillbesleepingsoundly.”Agrintuggedathislips.
“Whatonearthwillwedo,then?”
“Ihaveafewideas.We’lldiscussthemwhenyougethome.”Sheshrugged.“Ornot.MaybeI’lljustshowyou.”ShelaughedasSampulled
outhiscellphoneandhitspeeddial.“Whatareyoudoing?”sheasked.“CallingMack.Ifthere’sa
Godinheaven,hewillhavesolvedthatwebsiteproblemwithoutme.”
“Butyouwon’tbereallyhappyuntilyouseeforyourselfthatit’sbeenhandledproperly.Go.”Hehesitated,thenasked,
“We’reokay,evenaftermyslightlapseintoidiocy?”“We’reokay,”sheassured
him.Heclaimedherlipsone
moretime,thenheadedforthedoor.“Hurryhome,”shecalled
afterhim.“Ilikehowthatsounds,”
hesaid,thenclosedthedoorbehindhim.Carrielikedit,too,
probablyalittletoomuch,givenhowproneSamwastopanickingoverwherethingswereheadedbetweenthem.
***
Unfortunatelythetechissue
atthepaperhadn’tbeenresolved.IttookSamandMackhoursoffrustratingworkandwaytoomanycallstotheirserviceprovidertogeteverythingbackonlineandfunctioningproperly.“DoyouthinkKristin
Lewisdeliberatelyleftsomesortofbugintherejusttoyankyourchain?”Samasked,referringtothewomanwho’dinitiallydesignedthe
websiteandgottenitupandrunning.HeknewsheandMackhadaromantichistoryshe’dhopedtorecapturewhenshe’dcometotown.Ithadbeenamessysituation,complicatedwhenasubsequentrelationshipwithLukeO’Brienhadfallenapart,aswell.Macklookedstartledby
thesuggestion.“Ican’timaginethat.Ithought
KristinandIwereondecenttermsbythetimesheleft.”“Shewasstillthewoman
scorned,”Samremindedhim.“Well,itdoesn’tmatter,”
Macksaid.“Kristingotabetterjobclearacrossthecountry,andwe’vesolvedtheproblemonceandforall.”HeslappedSam’shandinacelebratoryhighfive.“Wethinkwe’vesolved
theproblem,”Samcorrected.
“IthoughtIhaditfixedlastweek,remember?Ifitcropsupagain,I’mseriousaboutlookingintosabotage.IfKristinisthewebgeniuseveryonesaysshewas,shecouldbehackinginfromanywhere.”“Iamnotgoingthere,”
Macksaid.“Infact,theonlythingI’mgoingtodorightnowisgohomeandspendwhat’sleftoftheevening
withmywife.Ihonestlythinkwemayhaveturnedacornerearliertoday.”HegaveSamawearylook.“OfcourseI’vethoughtthatbefore.”“DidsheunderstandwhyI
hadtopickBobbyupmyself?”“Eventually,”Macksaid.
“ButIdon’tthinkI’llmentionthatCarriegotinvolved.Itmightsetheroffagain.EverytimeIthink
thosetwohavemendedfences,anotherincidentcropsup.”“Carrieisgoingtobe
involvedwithBobbyandme,”Samsaidflatly.“Susieneedstoacceptthat.”“Thenit’sgottenserious?”
Mackasked.“It’sdefinitelymovingin
thatdirection,”Samsaid.“I’mscaredtodeathaboutthat.Thingsinmylifeare
changingwaytoofastforme.NotthatlongagoIwastheguywhowasalwaysreadytomoveonorgoonsomedangerousadventureatthedropofahat.Now,hereIam,adadandputtingdownrootsandthinkingaboutaddingawomantothemixforthelonghaul.Afewmonthsago,Iwouldn’thavebetfiftycentsonanyofthateverhappening.”
Macklaughed.“Wasthatpanicthatjustwashedacrossyourface?”Samnodded.“Morethan
likely.”Hepaused,thoughtaboutit,thenadded,“Youknowwhat,though?It’snotquiteasterrifyingasIexpectedittobe,becauseit’sBobbyandit’sCarrie.DoyouknowwhatImean?”“Believeme—Iknow
exactlywhatyoumean.Iwas
theultimateplayer,”Mackadmitted,hisexpressionnostalgic.“Ihadnointentionofeverallowingarelationshiptogetserious.Susiewiselyvowedshe’dneverevengooutwithaguywhotossedwomenawaythewayIdid.”Macklaughed.“Andthen
lightningstruckandIrealizedSusiewastheone.ForthefirsttimeinmylifeIknew
exactlywhatIwantedandwhoIwantedtobewith.”Helaughed.“Tomyeverlastingregret,ittookalotlongertoconvincehertotakeachancethatI’dmendedmyways.”“Noregrets?”“Notforme,”Macksaid
withouthesitation.“Notaone,evennowwhenthingsarerocky.IknowwebelongtogetherandIbelievewewillhaveachild.SusieandIare
inthistogetherfortherestofourlives.”Listeningtothedeeply
heldconvictionbehindMack’swords,Samnodded.HewantedtobelievethatstronglyinwhathehadwithCarrie.Hewasmorethanhalfwaythere.Hethoughtshemightbe,too.Hewasn’tsurewhatitwouldtaketogettherestofthewayorifeitherofthemwereuptothe
challenge,but,ifdeterminationtotakethatfinalleapcountedforanything,they’dgetthere.
***
BobbyhadgrapePopsicledribblingdownhischinandalloverhishandsandshirt.Carriehadgivenuptryingtokeepupwiththedripsandfiguredthisshirt,liketheone
he’dwornearlier,wouldeithercomecleaninthewashormakeanexcellentdustcloth.Theyweresittingonthe
backdecktosavethekitchenfloorfromtheinevitablestickiness,whenSamfoundthem.“Hey,buddy!Howareyou
feeling?”“Better,”Bobbyreported.
“I’mhavingPopsiclesfor
dinner.”“Excellent.”Hisgaze
soughtoutCarrie’sandheld.“Everythingokayaroundhere?”“We’redoingfine,ifyou
don’tcountthefactthatthisisthesecondshirtwe’veprobablylosttoPopsiclestains.”Samshrugged.“They’reT-
shirts.They’reexpendable.”“Mysentimentexactly.”
Sam’sexpressionsobered.HeliftedBobbyupandsathimonhislap.Inatoneheobviouslymeanttobecasual,hesaid,“So,pal,maybeyoushouldfillusinonwhatactuallyhappenedatschooltoday.”“Iwasinafight,”Bobby
said,asifitwereofnoconsequence.“Iknowthatmuch,”Sam
said,histonestilllight.“You
havetheblackeyeandsplitliptoproveit.Butsincefightingisn’tontheapprovedlistofschoolactivitiesandyou’reawareofthat,maybeyoucouldtellmewhohityouandwhy?Didsomeoneelsestartit?”Bobby’sexpressionshut
downandhedroppedtheremainderofhisicytreatontheground.“Idon’twanttotalkaboutit.”Hestruggledto
breakfree.“Iwanttogotobed.”“Notanoption,”Samsaid.
“Whathappened?”WhenBobbytriedonce
moretosquirmoffhislap,Samheldhiminplace.“Bobby,it’sokaytotell
us,”Carriesaidgently.“It’snottattling.”“Idon’tcareabout
tattling,”Bobbysaidangrily.“WhatPatsysaidwasalie,so
Ishovedher.”ShockspreadacrossSam’s
face.“Youshovedagirl?”“Don’tfeelsorryforher,”
Bobbysaidmutinously.“Becausethenshehitmeintheeyeandbustedmylip.”Hischeekscoloredpinkwithobviousembarrassment.“Thefightwaswitha
girl?”Samrepeated,asifhecouldn’tquitegrasptherealityofthat.
“She’smean,”Bobbydeclared.“Andshetoldabigoldlie.”“Whatwasthelie?”Carrie
asked,understandingthatwasattheheartofthefight.“Shesaidmymomanddad
wentawayandleftmeonpurposebecauseIwasadumb,stupidboy.”Carriegaspedatthecruelty
ofthat.Morethanlikelyasix-year-oldhadn’t
understoodthedepthofpainsuchacommentwouldcause,butitwasshockingjustthesame.NowonderBobbyhadreactedthewayhehad.“Youknowyourmomand
daddidn’twanttoleaveyou,”Samsaid,clearlyshaken.“Theylovedyoumorethananything.”“Iknow,”Bobbysaid
impatiently.“That’swhyitwasalie.”
Samcastawhat-nowlookinCarrie’sdirection.“Bobby,youstilldon’t
shovesomeonejustbecausetheysaymeanthingsthathurtyou,”Carriesaid,eventhoughshewouldn’tmindgivingthegirl’smotheragoodhardshove.ClearlylittlePatsyhadheardsomecommentathomethatencouragedsuchtalk.“Ihadtodosomething,”
Bobbysaidinfrustration.Carrierecognizedthe
childishsenseofimpotencebehindtheragehemusthavefelt.“Iknow,sweetheart.Youshouldhavewalkedawayandtoldtheteacher.Wouldn’tthathavebeenbetterthanshovingPatsyandhavingherpunchyou?Ifyou’ddonethat,youwouldn’thaveneededstitches.”“Itwasworthit,”Bobby
saidstubbornly.“BecauseIgotstitches,you’rehereandIgotPopsiclesfordinner.”CarriesawthatSamwas
strugglingtofightasmile.EventuallyhewasabletofaceBobbywithasoberexpression.“Andbecauseyouwere
fightingwhenyouknewbetter,younowgettogotoyourroomandthinkabouthowwrongitistohit
someoneelseortoshovethem,”hesaidsternly.“It’snotthewaywesolveproblems.”Hepointedtowardthehouse.“Go.”Bobbyclimbeddownand
headedinside,thoughhedidn’tlooktheleastbitrepentant.Justinsidethedoor,heturnedback.“Ifyou’dbeenthere,I’llbetyou’dhaveshovedher,too.”Whenhewasoutof
earshot,SammetCarrie’sgaze.“Isurewouldhavewantedto,”headmitted.“You’renotalonethere,”
Carrietoldhim.“YouprobablyshouldhaveaconversationwithlittleMissPatsy’smotherorfather.”Samlookedasifhe’d
rathereatdirt.“DoIhaveto?”Carrielaughed.“Scared
she’sgoingtosplityourlip,
too?”“Nope.”“Oh?”“I’mnot100percentsureI
won’tthrowthefirstpunch.”“Ihavefaithinyou,”
Carrieassuredhim.“Notonlydoesfightingnotresolveanything,whichyouperfectlywellknow,buthittingagirlisneveracceptable,somethingyoualsoknow.”Hegaveheralonglook.
“ThatchildtoldBobbythathismomanddadlefthimonpurpose.AmIsupposedtoforgetaboutthat?”Carriefeltherownanger
stiragainathisreminderofthehurtfulexchangethathadstartedallthis.“MaybeIshouldcomealong,”shesuggested.“Nottokeepyouincheck,butsothatIcanthrowapunch.There’snotasoulinthistownwho
wouldn’tbackmeup.”Sammovedtositbeside
heranddrapedanarmoverhershoulders.“AndthatiswhyIknowyouandIbelongtogether.We’reofonemind.”Hegaveherasidewaysglance.“Andmaybewe’remeanttokeepeachother’stempersincheck.”“Toobad.Idohavered
hairandthoseIrishgenes,youknow,andIhaven’tbeen
inagoodbrawlinyears,”shesaid,thenrestedherheadonhisshoulder.Sittingjustlikethat,with
thememoryofthepreviousnight’sglorioussunsetandpoignantbirthdaycelebrationstillverymuchonhermind,shefeltcontentmentstealoverher.SheglancedatSamandsawthatthetensioninhisjawhadeased,aswell.This,shethought,was
whatrealcouplesdid.Theyfacedproblemstogether,workedthroughthem,andtheirfamilieswerestrongerbecauseofit.TheonlyissuessheandMarceverresolvedtogetherwereworkrelated.Anytimeshe’dtriedtobringuphisneglectoranythingelsepersonal,he’dtunedherout.Sheshouldhaverecognizedtheyweremissingoutonakeyaspectofany
goodrelationship.Shehadherowncrazy
familywithallofitsupsanddownstolooktoasprimeexamplesofthewayitshouldbedone.Noteverydaywassunshineandroses.Thosehurdles,facedtogether,werethestrengthbehindeveryO’Brienfamily.
20
SamrequestedameetingwithBobby’steacher,AmyPennington,andPatsy’smother,AllisonRogers.Thethreeofthemmetinthefirst-gradeclassroomafterschoolthedayafterthefightthathadsentBobbytoNoah’soffice.
AllisonRogersappearedtobeaniceenoughwoman,alittleharriedandabitindignantaboutbeingdraggedawayfromworkinthemiddleoftheafternoon,butotherwisereasonablypleasant.Sheseemedgenuinelymystifiedaboutwhyshewasthere.Bobby’steacher,whodid,
indeed,lookalittlelikeMrs.Clauswithherwhitehairand
framelessglasses,tookchargeofthemeeting.“Allison,I’mnotsureif
you’reawarethatwehadaproblemontheplaygroundyesterday.Ididleaveyouamessage,butsinceyoudidn’tcallback,Ican’tbesureifyougotit,”Mrs.Penningtonsaid.“Lastnightwasinsane.I
nevercheckedformessages,”Mrs.Rogersadmitted.“Was
itanythingserious?Ifso,theofficehasmycellnumber.”“Itriedthat,aswell.”The
teacherwavedofftheissue.“Itdoesn’tmatternow,sinceyouobviouslyreceivedtherequesttobeherethisafternoon.”“Theprincipalcalledme
thismorningatworkandmadeitseemlikeamatteroflifeordeath,”shesaid.“Icertainlyhopeit’satleastthat
important.MybosshatesitwhenIleaveearlyandIneedthisjob.”“Thenlet’saddressthis
quickly,”Mrs.Penningtonsuggestedbriskly.“YesterdayPatsywasinvolvedinafightwithSam’snephew,Bobby.Shesaidsomethingquitecruelandhe,naturally,tookoffense.Hegaveherashove,andthenshesplithislipandgavehimablackeye.”
“That’swhathegetsforshovingher,”Allisonsaiddefensively,frowningatSam.“Surelyheknowsbetter.”Samhadlefttheentire
conversationuptotheteacheruntilnow,buthecouldn’tletthatpass.“Howwouldyoureactifyouwereascaredsix-year-oldlivingwithanuncleyoubarelyknowinanewtown,attendinganewschoolandsomeonetoldyouthat
yourrecentlydeceasedparentshaddeliberatelyleftyoubecauseyouwereano-good,stupidboy?”Tohercredit,Mrs.Rogers
lookedshocked.“That’swhatPatsysaid?”“I’mafraidso,”theteacher
confirmed.“Ioverheardhermyself,butbeforeIcouldintervene,BobbyhadlashedoutandPatsyhadhithimhardenoughthatherequired
stitches.”Patsy’smomregardedSam
withwhatappearedtobegenuineregret.“Iamsosorry.Ihatetoadmitit,butIthinkIhavesomeideawherethisiscomingfrom.Patsy’sfatherrecentlyleftus.OneofhispartingshotswasthathewasgoingbecauseIwasafailureatdisciplineandthekids—Ihaveason,too—areout-of-controlbrats.Naturally
thatwasshoutedatthetopofhislungsfromthefrontlawn.Patsyandherbrotherheardeveryword.”Ofcoursewiththatpiece
ofinformationaddedin,thewholeincidentmadeperfectsensetoSam.InPatsy’shead,ifaparentwentaway,ithadtobeonpurposeandithadtobebecausethechildrenwerenogood.She’dbeentakingherownpainoutonBobby.
“I’msorry,”Samsaid.“Hey,hewasn’tavery
nicemanandwewereaterriblecouple,”shesaidbitterly.“Ithinkwe’dforgottenwhywe’dfalleninlovebythetimetheceremonywasover,butwehunginthereuntilPatsyturnedfive.Herbrother’sfour.MydelightfulhusbandfiguredbythenTeddywouldbeoldenoughforpreschool
andPatsywouldbegoingintofirstgrade,soIcouldgobacktoworktosupportthem.”“I’msorry,”Samsaid
again,realizingitwaspossibleforchildrentosufferlossesalmostasemotionallydevastatingaslosingtwoparentsinanaccident.“Ithinkwecanseevery
clearlythattherearetwosidestoeverystory,”the
teachersaid.“Thatdoesn’texcusethebehavior,butatleastitgivesussomecontext.Mr.Winslow,doyouagree?”“Absolutely,”Samsaid.“I’lltalktoPatsy,”Mrs.
Rogerspromised.“I’llmakesuresheapologizestoBobby.I’llbringhertoschoolmyselfinthemorningandstandtheretoseethatshedoesit.”“DittowithBobbyforhis
partinthefight,”Samsaid.
“I’llbeherebeforeschool,aswell.”Theteacherbeamedat
them.“Iknewwecouldworkthisout.I’llseeeachofyoubeforeclassstartstomorrowmorning.”SamwalkedPatsy’s
motherbacktotheparkinglot.“Ireallyamsorryyou’regoingthroughsuchatoughtime.”Sheshrugged.“Nomore
thanIdeservefornotlisteningtoasinglesoulwhotriedtotellmemyhusband-to-bewasajerk.”Shemanagedasmile,thoughitseemedabitforced.“I’mgettingbettereveryday.I’vealmostconcludedthatI’mnottheterriblepersonhesaidIwas,either.”SheregardedSamwithachagrinedexpression.“Godhelpher,isitanywonderPatsycan’tget
pasthispartingshot?Icertainlyhaven’tandI’msupposedtobethematuregrown-up.”“Butyouwill,”Samsaid
withconfidence.“Isawyourfightingspiritreturningbackinthatclassroom.”Sheseemedsurprisedby
hisassessment.“Youknow,itis.Thanksfornoticing.I’llseeyouinthemorning.AndItrulyregretthatPatsysaid
somethingthatcrueltoBobby,tosaynothingofthesplitlip.I’dbehappytocoverthemedicalbill.”Thelastwasobviouslyaddedonimpulse,onesheclearlyregrettedthemomentshe’dspoken.Recognizingthatfinancial
difficultieswereweighingonher,Samletheroffthehook.“Notnecessary.Myinsurancehasitcovered.”
“Ifyoueverhavetimeforacupofcoffee,”shebeganhesitantly.Samcutheroffbeforeshe
couldcompletetheinvitation.“Thanks,butI’mseeingsomeone.”Sheflushed.“You’re
singleandgood-looking.Ofcourseyouare.Iwasjustthinkingthatoursituationsmightgiveusalotincommon.SometimesI’m
afraidI’llgocrazyifIdon’thaveanotheradultaroundwhogetsit.”Beforehecouldthinkof
whattosaytosmoothovertheuncomfortablemoment,shehurriedaway,clearlyembarrassed.“Well,thatwassomething
new,”hemurmuredasheheadedforhiscar.Herealizedhe’drecentlyjoinedtheapparentlydesirable
groupofavailablesingledads.Sure,he’dbeenhitonbyplentyofwomen,butthiswasthefirsttimetheattractionhadbeenbasedonthesharedcomplexitiesofsingleparenthood.
***
Carrieagreedtomeethertwin,NoahandJacksonforatourofhernewday-care
centeronSundaymorningbeforetheyallheadedtoGrandpaMick’sfordinner.Asproudasshewasofthefacilityandaseagerasshewastoshowitoff,shewasanticipatingalivelycross-examinationfromCaitlynasthemainagendafortheget-together.Sureenough,assoonas
NoahwheeledJackson’sstrollerintothemainactivity
room,CaitpulledCarrieintothekitchen,wheretheyhadalittleprivacy.“Whatdoyouthinkofthe
place?”Carrieaskedcheerfully,hopingtoforestalltheinterrogation.“It’slovely.You’llbea
hugesuccess.Yada-yada.I’msureyou’veheardallthatfromeverymemberofourfamily.Nowtellmewhat’sgoingonwithyouandSam.I
thoughtIwarnedyoutostayawayfromhim.”“It’snotthefirsttimeI’ve
ignoredyouradvice,”Carrieremindedher.“Yes,Ibelievethelast
timewaswhenItoldyounottogetinvolvedwithyourboss,”Caitlynremindedher.“GivenhowthingsworkedoutwithMarcReynolds,I’dthinkmycredibilitywouldbeprettygoodrightnow.”
“Thisisnothinglikethat,”Carrieinsisted.“AtleastSamseemstobe
moresubstancethanflash—I’llgiveyouthat,”hersistersaid.“EveryoneI’vespokentoreallylikeshim.”“SotheO’Brienhotlineis
workingwell,”Carriecommenteddryly.“Goodtoknow.What’sthemethodofchoice?Stilltexting?”“Mostly,”Caitadmitted.
“AtleastfromGrandpaMick.Ourauntsprefertotalkonthephone.And,ofcourse,NoahandIareonSkypealmostdailysoIcanseehowJacksonisgrowing.”“How’sthelong-distance
thingworkingforyou?”Carrieasked,seizingonaparticularlydelicatedebatebetweenhusbandandwifeandtherestofthefamily.CaitandNoahusually
claimeditwasworkingjustfine.Nooneelsecouldquitebelieveit.Caitsighedheavily.“Ihate
beingseparatedfromthem,okay?Iadmitit.Butthisisthewayithastobe.I’mjustinBaltimoreuntilIfinishmyinternshipandresidency.ThenNoahandIwillbetogether.Icanbehereinacoupleofhours,tops,ifanythingcomesup.Noah
comesupwheneverI’moffonaweekendorIcomedownhere.It’sstressfulattimes,butwe’remakingitwork.”“Thenwhyareyouwasting
evenonesecondofthattimeinherelecturingme,whenyoucouldbealonewithyourhusband?”Carriedemanded.“I’llevenkeepJacksonforthenextcoupleofhoursandbringhimwithmetoGrandpaMick’s.”
“Atemptingoffer,tobesure,”Caitsaid,herregretplain.“ButI’monamissiontofigureoutwhetherornotyou’reabouttoruinyourlife.NoahsaidthingswereawfullytensebetweenyouandSamwhenhebroughtBobbyintheotherday.HegotthefeelingSamdidn’treallywantyouthere.”Carriegaveuptryingto
avoidthewholediscussion.
“Hehadhisreasons.We’veworkeditout.Likeyousaid,that’swhatadultsinacommittedrelationshipdo,right?Theyworkthroughthings.Noteverydayisafestivalofloveandlaughter.”Caitlaughed.“Iwish.
Okay,sothingsarefinewithSam.Howfine?Anytalkofafuture?”“Notbeyondwhetherhe
andBobbywillbeatGrandpa
Mick’stoday.I’mthinkingIshouldwarnhimtostayhome.”“Don’tyoudare.Iwantto
seehimformyselfandseeyouwithhim.”“We’renotthat
interesting.”Caitputanarmaroundher
shoulders.“Hey,you’remybabysister—”“Bytwominutes,”Carrie
remindedher.
“Itstillcounts.Ihavetolookoutforyourbestinterests.”“Don’tyouthinkIget
enoughofthatfromtheO’Briensrighthereonthescene?”Carrieaskedwearily.“Mom,TraceandGrandpaMickhavemademetheirpetprojectlately.”“ButIhavespecial
insight,”Caitclaimed,thenlinkedanarmthrough
Carrie’s.“Nowshowmearoundinhere.Istillcan’tbelieveyou’reopeningaday-carecenter.”“Believeit.Ifthereareno
morelast-minuteglitches,thedoorsopenafterThanksgiving.Theinspectorsfoundahalfdozennitstopickontheirlastvisit.”Shesighed.“Oh,well,itwastobeexpectedtheytellme.MyonlyrealregretisthatIstill
haven’tfoundtheperfectassistantmanager.I’vehiredacoupleofgreatpeoplewithexperiencewithkidsandgoodeducationalrequirements,butI’dreallylikesomeonewithasolidbackgroundataday-carecenter.”“Areyouexcited?”“Excited,terrified,allof
that,”Carrieadmitted.“Whatifthekidsaremiserableand
theparentsyankthemout?MaybeIshouldhavestucktobabysittingO’BrienbabiesonWillowBrookRoad.”“Stopthat!Thechildren
willbesafeandblissfullyhappy.You’renotgoingtofail,”Caitsaidwithtotalconfidence.“AndnotjustbecauseO’Briensdon’tfail,butbecauseyou’reyouandevenIcanseethatthisistheperfectfitforyou.Momwas
right.Weallshouldhaveseenitmuchsooner.”“Andsavedmethedisaster
thatwasmylifeinParis?”“Somethinglikethat,”Cait
said.Inanexampleofperfect
timing,ormoreprecisely,perfectlyterribletiming,Carrie’scellphonechirpedoutitsalertforanincomingtext.Sheignoredit.“You’renotgoingtocheck
that?”Caitasked,herexpressioncurious.“I’mbusywithyou.
Whateveritiscanwait.”“Andyouknowthathow?”
Caitaskedsuspiciously.“Doyouknowwho’stexting,Carrie?”“Ihavesomeidea.”Beforeshecouldreactto
preventit,hertwingrabbedthecell.Hereyeswidenedindismay.“Marc?You’rein
touchwithMarc?”“Iamnotintouchwith
Marc,”Carriereplieddefensively.“He’sbeentexting.”Shehesitated,thenadded,“Andcalling.I’vebeenignoringhim.UsuallyIjustshutoffmyphone,soIdon’thavetobebotheredlookingatthetexts.I’vedeletedthevoicemailswithoutlisteningtothem.”“Goodforyou,”Caitsaid.
ShestudiedCarriealittletoointently.“You’renotevenalittlecuriousaboutwhathewants?”“Notenoughtoopenthat
dooragain,”Carriesaidfirmly.“MylifeisfallingintoplacejustthewayIwantit,too.Marcisnotapartofit.”“Okay,then.Iwon’tfreak
outoverhimtryingtocontactyou.Now,showmejusthowfabulousthisplaceisgoingto
be.”Forthenexthalfhour,
Carrieshowedhersistereverynookandcrannyofthecenter,watchingherfaceclosely.That,ratherthanherwords,wouldtelltherealstoryaboutwhatshethoughtofCarrie’sseeminglyimpulsivecareerchoice.“Noah,isn’titfantastic?”
Caitsaidatlast,whirlingaroundinapoolofsunlight
inthemiddleofthemainroom.“It’ssuchahappyplace.”Noahchuckled.“Iimagine
youcanhearthelaughteralready.”“Well,Ican,”Caitsaid.
“Jackson’sgoingtoloveithere.And,Carrie,you’regoingtobeahugesuccess!”“Iagree,”Noahsaid.“I
checkedoutallofyourfirst-aidsuppliesandcan’tthinkof
athingyoumissed.”“Thanksfordoingthat,”
Carriesaid.“Thoughit’sabigcomfortknowingyourofficeisrightupthestreet.”“IwishIcouldstayan
extracoupleofdaystothrowabigopen-housepartyforyoutospreadtheword,”Caitsaid.“Iappreciatethethought,
butIdon’tneedaparty.Ijustwanttogetthedoorsopen
andgettowork,”Carriesaid.“Buttheentireregion
needstoknowaboutthisplace,”Caitargued.“YouwereinmarketingandPR.Youknowthat.”“Ialreadyhaveawaiting
listforplaces,”Carrietoldher.“It’skillingmetoturnpeopledown.ThelastthingIneedisevenmorepeoplewantingtogetonthatlist.”“Isupposeyouhavea
point,”Caitconceded.“There’snoreasontocreateademandyoualreadyknowyoucan’tmeet.Whataboutafamilyparty?”Carrielaughed.“Areyou
kiddingme?Yousaidityourselfjustaminuteago.Idon’tthinkthere’sasinglepersoninourfamilywhohasn’twanderedinandoutofhereonanalmost-dailybasis.Everybodywantstobethe
firsttoseehowit’scomingalong.GrandpaMickisbaskinginthegloryofbeingbothconstructionforemanandtourguide.Hemaynotentirelyagreewithmyplans,buthetakesgreatprideinhisworkmanship.”“Ofcoursehedoes,”Cait
said.“Thenjustletmeaddmystampofapproval.”Carriegavehersistera
fiercehug.“Thatmeansalot.
Youknowthat,don’tyou?”“Thesamewayitmeans
theworldtomethatwhenmysonisn’twithNoahorme,he’sinyourhands,”Caitsaid.“Loveyou.”“Rightbackatyou.”Somethingdeepinside
Carrieeasedaftertheexchange.Thoughshewouldneverhaveadmitteditaloud,hersister’sapproval—thewholefamily’sforthatmatter
—meanteverythingtoher.
***
OverthecourseoftheafternoonatMick’s,SamfoundhimselffascinatedbywatchingCarriewithhertwinsister.Itseemedtohimthatthetwowomencouldn’thavebeenmoredifferent.Oh,notinappearance.Therewasnomistakingthattheywere
identicaltwins.ButCaitlynlookedasifshe’ddressedinahurryandperhapsinthedark.AtthesametimeCarrie,eveninhernewday-to-daywardrobe,lookedasifshe’dsteppedoutofafashionmagazine.Apparentlyonceshe’dlearnedtheskillofdressing,shecouldachieveastylishlookwithasimpletwistofascarforawell-chosenpieceofcostume
jewelry,thoughsomethingtoldhimthatwas18-karatgoldshewaswearingandthatthestoneswererealgems,notfakes.Hewasponderingthe
differencesinstyleandpersonality,whenNoahcameoverandaskedaboutBobby.“Igotaquicklookathis
stitchesasheracedpastaminuteago,”Noahsaid.“Nosignofinfection.Bringhim
inthisweekandwe’llgetthemout.Anyafternoon’sokay.Justdropin.”“Thanks,”Samsaid.“Howdidthingsgoat
school?Problemresolved?”“Fornow,”Samsaid.“I
supposetherearealwaysgoingtobekidswhosayhatefulthings.IjustwanttobesureBobbydoesn’tbecomeoneofthem.”“Agoaleveryparent
shouldhave,”Noahagreed.“Eventhoughit’stoughtomonitorthemeverysecondoftheday.”HestudiedSammoreintently.“Youdoingokay?Youwerethrustintoparenthoodprettyunexpectedly.”“I’dliketothinkI’m
gettingbettereverydayatfiguringouthownottomessthingsup,”Samsaid.“Carrie’sbeenahugehelpon
thatfront.”“Ifyoudon’tmindme
sayingso,youdidn’tseemallthatthrilledtohaveherhelptheotherday.”“Yousawthat?”Samsaid,
chagrined.“Myinsecuritieswereinfullswing.IthoughtIshouldbetheadultdealingwiththecrisis.BobbywantedCarrie.Ihatetoadmitit,butonsomelevelIwasjealous.”Tohissurprise,Noah
laughed.“I’vebeenthereatimeortwomyself.Carriehasawaywithkids,includingmyson.Youhavenoideahowmyhearttwistswhenhe’ssobbingandthrowinghisfoodatme.Thenshewalksinandit’sasifthesun’scomeout.He’ssuddenlyallsmiles.Worse,hecooperateswithwhatevershewantsfromhim.Maybeit’sbecausesheremindshim
ofhismomormaybeshehasamagictouchwithkids.EitherwayIfeellikeafailure,andthenIfeellikeajerk.Ishouldwantmychildtobehappy,right?It’snotaboutwhoassuresthat.”“Soyou’retellingmethe
wholewounded-pridethingisprobablyabitofmachocraziness?”Samsuggested.Noahshrugged.“Pretty
much.Thereareplentyof
timeswhenJackson’sfallingasleeponmychestorwhenItrytocoaxhimtosayDa-Daandhealmostgetsitright,thatIrealizeheandIaremakingourownmemories.Whenhe’sbigger,I’mtheonewho’llteachhimtoputawormonahookandcleanafish.Trustme,Caitmaynotbesqueamishwhenitcomestopeople,butsheisn’ttouchingwormsorthe
innardsofafish.Carrie’snotfondofthat,either.”“SoIcancreatetheguy
memorieswithBobby,”Samconcluded.“You’realsohis
connectiontohisparents,”Noahsaidquietly.“Nobodyelsecanfillthatrole.”“Hedoeshave
grandparentsonhisdad’sside.I’mencouragingthemtobeapartofhislife.”
“Butyougrewupwithhismom.Whoelseistheretotellhimstoriesaboutwhatshewaslikeasalittlegirl?”“Shewasapest,”Samsaid
emphatically,butfondly.“Tellhimthat.Ibethe’ll
lovehearingallaboutit.”JustthenCarriejoined
them.“Youtwolookawfullyserious,”shesaid,thenfrownedatherbrother-in-law.“You’renot
interrogatinghim,areyou?”“Notatall,”Noahsaidat
once.“I’llleavethattomywifeandMick.”Carrierolledhereyes.
“ExactlywhyIcameoverhere,”shetoldSam,“tolureyouawaybeforeCaitormygrandfatherfindthetimetoquestionyouaboutyourintentions.Ithinkawell-timedretreatisinorder.”Noahlaughed.“Goodluck
withthat,”hesaid,wanderingoffinsearchofhiswifeandson.“Youreallywanttogo?”
SamaskedCarrie.“Don’tyou?I’dthink
you’dbetiredofbeinginthemidstofthiscrowdafterafewhoursofspeculativelooksandprobablywaytoomanyintrusivequestions.”“I’muptoit.Ithought
you’dprobablywanttospend
moretimewithyoursister.Isn’tsheheadingbacktoBaltimorethisevening?”“I’veenduredaboutas
manyofherpointedquestionsasIcanhandleforoneday.I’llbegladtoseethelastofher.”Samregardedherwith
shock.“Youdon’tmeanthat.”Carriechuckled.“Of
coursenot.We’llbeonthe
phoneatleasttwicetomorrow,butwhenwe’reonthephone,Icanalwayshangupifshegetstoonosy.Inperson,Ican’tgetaway.”“Somebodyoughttodoa
studyofthedynamicsofthisfamily.ItwouldprobablymakeagreatPhDdissertation.”“I’llmentionthattoWill,”
shesaid,takinghimseriously.“He’sstillintouch
withsomeofhispsychologyprofessors.”Shetookhishand.“Nowlet’sscootwhilewecan.”Samlookedintohereyes.
“Didyouhavesomethinginmindfortherestoftheday?”“AquietwalkalongShore
Road,thensomeicecream,”shesaid,muchtohisdisappointment.“Soundsgood,”hesaid,
tryingtomusterupsome
enthusiasmwhenhismindhadalreadywanderedtomuchmoreenjoyablepursuits.Carrietuckedanarm
throughhisandgavehimaknowinglook.“I’mthinkingallthisactivityhere,plusthesugarfromanice-creamconewillhaveBobbydownforthecountinanhour.”“Ah,”Samsaid,
understandingatlast.“And
then?”“Ibetifweuseour
imaginations,we’llbeabletothinkofsomething.”“Alreadyonit,”Samsaid.
Infact,hewasseveralwickedstepsahead.
***
Carrieobviouslyknewkidsprettydarnwell,Samconcludedashetucked
Bobbyintobedfiveminutesaftertheyreturnedhomeaftereatingicecream.Bobbybarelymusteredupamildprotestattheearlyhour.“Toldyou,”Carriesaid,
smilingupathimwhenhejoinedheronthedeckoutback.She’dopenedabottleof
redwineandpouredtwoglasses.Whenhepickedhisup,shetappedherstoit.
“Cheers!”Samheldhergaze.“Itwas
agoodday,wasn’tit?”Shenodded.“Itfeltright
somehow,youandBobbybeingtherewithme.”Samdrewinadeepbreath,
thenadmitted,“Itfeltthatwaytome,too.ThelasttimeIwasthereitwasalittleintimidating.”“O’Briens,cumulatively
anyway,canbeascary
bunch.They’vebeenknowntoterrifymefromtimetotime.One-on-one,though,they’rejustfamily.”Shegavehimalonglook.“Ithinkthey’reallwonderinghowlongit’sgoingtobebeforeyou’reapartofthefamily.”WhenSamopenedhismouthtospeak,sheheldupahand.“Letthemwonder,Sam.That’sonthem.YouandIhaveagreedwe’retakingone
stepatatime.”Tohissurprise,shedidn’t
seemtobebotheredbytheslow,steadypacetowardanuncertainending.Hesmiledatherdeliberatenonchalance.“Anythoughtsonhow
we’llknowwhenwegettothelaststep?”heasked,takingherhandandweavingtheirfingerstogetherastheysatsidebysidewithdarknessfalling.
“SinceI’venevergottentherewithanyonebefore,I’mnotsure,butbasedonevidenceI’veseenaroundme,Ithinkwe’llrecognizeitwhenithappens.”“Areyouokaywith
waiting?”Sheturnedtohimthen,her
expressionearnest.“Dowehaveachoice?Sam,Ilikeyou.No,morethanthat,IthinkImaybefallinginlove
withyou,butit’snotaone-sideddecision.Icanwaittillyougetthere,andthenwecandecidewhathappensnext.”“Somepeoplethinksex
comesintoplayatsomepoint,”hesaid,fightingasmileandarushofhormonesstirredjustbythesuggestion.“Don’tthinkforone
secondthatthethoughthasn’tcrossedmymind,”shesaid.
“You?”“It’sfrontandcenterright
now,asamatteroffact.”Hesawherlipscurveat
that.Thenshesighed.“Goodtoknow.”“Butit’snotgoingto
happen,isit?”hesaidwithregret.“Nottonightwiththe
possibilitythatBobbycouldwakeupandwanderinonus,”shesaid.
“Runawaywithme,”hepleadedwithsomeurgency.Carrielaughed.“MuchasI
mightwantto,Icanwait.Anticipationishalfthefun.”“It’snotthehalfI’dliketo
gettorightnow,”Samgrumbled.Heliftedherhandtohislipsandkissedherknuckles,thentookeachfingerintohismouth.Heheardherbreathhitch,evenashisbloodhummed.“You
wouldn’twanttocomeoverandsharethisloungechairwithme,wouldyou?”“Soundsdangerous,”she
said.“ExactlywhatIwas
thinking.”Asecondlater,shewas
stretchedoutbesidehim,herheadonhisshoulder,herbodyfitsnuglyagainsthis.Itwasaformofsweettorturetobesure,butitdefinitely
clarifiedthedirectioninwhichtheywereheading.
21
Carriewasgoingthroughthestackofrésumésonherdeskonceagain,hopingtospottheperfectcandidateforassistantmanager.Unfortunately,shekeptgettingdistractedbymemoriesofhereveningwithSam.
Themoretimetheyspenttogether,theclosertheyweregetting.And,shethoughtwryly,themorefrustratedtheywerebecoming.Despitetheirreaffirmationjustlastnightthattheywouldn’tsleeptogetherwithBobbyinthehouse,thatrulewasgettingmoreandmoredifficulttoabideby.Norweretheyinany
positiontosuddenlytakeoff
foradayortwoontheirown,eventhoughKevinandShannahadofferedmorethanoncetoletBobbyhaveasleepoverattheirhouse.Theybothhadtoomuchworkrightnowtotakeadvantageoftheoffer.Plus,ifshewerebeing
totallyhonest,Carriewasn’tsureshewasreadytodealwithallthequestionsthatwereboundtofollowifthe
familydiscoveredthey’dgoneonatriptogether.WithO’Briensthatwastantamounttoanadmissionthataweddingwasrightaroundthecorner.Inquiriesalongthatlinewouldaddwaytoomuchpressure.AndthentherewasMarc.
Asdiligentasshe’dbeenaboutignoringhistextsandcalls,hisinsistentattemptstocontactherkeptthatpartof
herlifeverymuchalive.Shedidn’twantanypartofthatoldlife,butshecouldn’tquiteforgetit—orhim—completely.WhatdidthatsayaboutherfeelingsforSam?Sincewrestlingwithallof
thiswasgettinghernowhere,shesighedandforcedherattentionbacktotherésumés.Shereachedthebottomofthepileandconcludedthattherewasnothingshe’dmissedthe
firsttimearound.Theresimplywerenogoodcandidates.Justthen,ataponthefront
doorofthecenterstartledher.Mostpeoplejustwalkedin,evenwiththeclosedsignonthedoor.Shehurriedacrosstheroom,wonderingiftherewassomeinspectionshehadn’tknownaboutorpossiblyaparentdesperatetofindchildcareandhopingnot
tobeturnedawayiftheycameinperson.Instead,shediscovered
Lucyontheporch.“Hi,”Lucysaid,shifting
nervouslyfromfoottofoot,atentativesmileonherface.“Iknowyoumustbeswampedwithdetails,butdoyouhavesometimetotalktome?”“Foryou,absolutely,”
Carriesaidwithdelight.“Whatbringsyouhere?
Comeonin.Ihavesomebottledwaterifyou’rethirsty,butnotmuchelse.”“That’sokay.I’mgood.
Well,mostlygood.ActuallyI’malittlerattled,becauseIdon’tknowhowyou’regoingtoreacttothis,butMomtoldmeIhadtotry.”Carrieledthewaytoher
crampedoffice,thenregardedhernervousguestwithconfusion.“Lucy,you’re
alwayswelcomehere.Aftereverythingyouandyourmomhavedoneforme,arestilldoingforme,Iconsideryoutobemuchmorethanmentors.You’refriends.Nowhaveaseatandtellmewhat’sonyourmind.Isyourmomintownwithyou?Shedidn’tmentionyouwereplanningavisit.”Lucyshookherhead.“No,
she’sbeenattheday-care
centersincedawnasusual.butwedidcomedownyesterday.Itwasalast-minutething.Italkedherintoit.Shedidn’twanttoadmititwhenwewereherethelasttime,butshefellinlovewithChesapeakeShoresthesamewayIdid.”Carrielaughed.
“Everybodydoes.DidyougobacktoBrady’s?”“Actuallywejustgrabbed
asandwichatSally’sCafé,andthenspentsometimewitharealestateagent,awomannamedSusieFranklin.Shesaidshe’syourcousin.”Ah,sothatexplained
Susie’sabsencefromyesterday’sdinner.CarriehadfearedshewasavoidingSamandBobby.Maybeher,aswell.“Susie’sgreat,andshe
certainlyknowseverysinglepieceofpropertyinthetown.Areyouallseriouslythinkingofrelocating?Thatwouldbefantastic!”Shefrownedasathoughtcrossedhermind.“Yourmom’snotworriedthatI’llthinkshe’swatchingovermyshoulder,isshe?”“Notatall.Iactuallythink
I’vejustaboutconvincedherthatit’stimetoretire,orwillbewhenhercurrentclients
aretoooldtoneedheranymore.That’lltakeanothertwoorthreeyears,butforthatlongshecouldcommute,justlikeyoutoldher.”“She’dclosehercenter?”
Carrieasked,startled.“She’sdonereallywell
withit,buttobehonest,she’shadnolife.I’llbegraduatingfromcollegethisyear,sothatfinancialburdenwillbebehindher.”
“Howwereyouabletopersuadeyourmomtoconsiderthismove?”Carrieasked.“Itoldhershe’snotgetting
anyyounger.”Carriewinced,butsaid
nothing.“Itoldherit’swaypast
timeforhertodosomethingforherself,”Lucycontinuedearnestly.“Ithinkthistownistheplaceforhertoreinvent
herself.She’sstartingtoagree.”Herexpressionbrightened
withthebubblyenthusiasmthatmadehersogreatwithkids.“Weactuallymadeanofferonahouseyesterday,”sherevealed.“Yourcousincalledlastnightandtheofferwasaccepted.Mymomturnedpale,butIreallythinkshe’sasexcitedasIam,justalittlescaredabouttakingsuch
ahugestep.”“Oh,mygosh,that’s
incredible!”Carriesaid.“I’msohappyyou’regoingtobecloseby.”ShestudiedLucyandsawthatshewasstillabundleofnerves.“Butyoudidn’tcomebyjusttosharethatnewswithme,didyou?”“No,”sheadmitted,then
drewinadeepbreath.“Icametoaskifyou’dconsiderhiringme,part-timetillI
graduateinthespring,andthenmaybefull-time.”Carrie’sjawdropped.
“You’reserious?You’dwanttoworkwithmehere?”“Ilikeyou.Icanalready
tellI’lllovethistown.Thisfacilityisbeautiful.You’vecreatedawonderfulenvironmentforkids.Formeit’sexactlywhereI’dwanttowindupaftergraduation.Idon’tlikewherewe’re
locatednow,evenifitwouldmeantakingoveranestablisheddaycare.”Sheshrugged.“Imightaswellseizetheopportunitynow,ifthereisone.”“Andyourmomdoesn’t
carethatyou’reabandoningher?”“LikeIsaid,she’salready
cuttingback.Prettysoonshewon’thaveaplaceforme,anyway.Shewastheonewho
suggestedthis,asamatteroffact.Doyoustillneedanyhelp?PleasetellmeI’mnottoolate.”Carriestoodupandthrew
herarmsaroundthegirl.“You,myfriend,aretheanswertomyprayers.I’vehiredacoupleofpromisingemployees,butI’ddespairedofeverfindingagoodcandidateforassistantmanager.Youhavethe
experienceandqualificationsforthat,ifyou’reinterested.Iknowitwouldn’tbefull-timeatfirst,butIthinkwecouldgetthroughthisyearokaytillyou’refinishedwithschool.Iknowhowgoodyouare,Lucy.Notjustwiththekids,butwiththebusinesssideofthings.Whenyourmomwashittingmewithtoomuchinformationthatsoundedlikeaforeignlanguage,you
turneditintoplainEnglish.Please,pleasesayyou’lldoit.”Asmilespreadacross
Lucy’sface.“Icameinherescaredtodeathtoaskyouforafavor,andnowitalmostseemsasifI’mdoingoneforyou.”“Youwouldbe.Bringing
youonboardwouldfreeupalittleofmytime.”Aknowingexpression
passedoverLucy’sface.“Sothereisaguy?Iknewit.ItoldMomyouweretoofantasticnottohaveaspecialmanhiddenaway.”AnimageofSamcameto
mind,ofthewayhiskissescontinuedtoknockhersocksoff,ofhowmuchmoreshethoughttherecouldbebetweenthem.“Yeah,thereisaman,”sheconceded.“Notthatmakingasuccessofthis
businessisn’tmytoppriorityrightnow.”“Ofcourseitis,butI’ve
beentellingMomforyearsthatherlifeshouldn’tbeallaboutmeandbusiness.IthinkwhenDadleftittooksomethingoutofher.I’mhopinglivingherewillgiveherbackthatpartofherself.”“ChesapeakeShoresdoes
haveawayofcreatingthatkindofmagic,”Carriesaid.
“So,exceptfortalkingsalaryandschedule,dowehaveadeal?”Lucynoddedeagerly.“We
haveadeal.”Fortheveryfirsttimesince
she’dsethercareerplanintomotion,Carriewastrulyfilledwithconfidencethatshewouldsucceed.And,intime,withLucy’senergy,exuberanceandexperienceonboard,she’dbeabletogetthe
sortofbalanceintoherlifethathermomandeveryotherwomanintheO’Brienclanworkedsohardtoachieve.
***
WhenSamwalkedintoSally’stograbanicedteaandasandwichtogo,theblackCadillacEscaladewithitsuniformeddriverandhandsome,semifamous
occupantwasthetalkofthecafé.Samoverheardjustenoughtomakehisbloodruncold.Henoddedtowardthe
gossipingtriooffemaletouristsintheclosestbooth,thenaskedSally,“What’sthatabout?”“Thatdesigner,theone
Carrieusedtoworkfor,wasinhereafewminutesagolookingforher.Obviously
thosewomendon’tknowthekindofmanheisortheywouldn’tbeactinglikefoolsoverhim.”“Anyideawhathewanted,
asidefromCarrie,thatis?”Samasked,hisheartinhisthroat.Wasthisit?Hadshefinallyrespondedtothosetextsandmessagesshe’dclaimedtobeignoring?WasthisCarrie’schancetogobacktothelifethatso
obviouslysuitedher?He’dneverunderstoodhowanysanemancouldlethergo.HadReynoldsfinallyseenthelightandcometoclaimher?He’dcharmedheronce.Couldhedoitagain?“I’mafraidhedidn’tfill
meinonhisplans,”Sallysaiddryly.“Iam,afterall,justtheownerofasmall-towncaféinthemiddleofnowhere.”
Samsmiledatherattitude.“Abitofasnob,washe?”“Morelikeanoilysnake
charmer,”shecorrected.“Irecognizethetype.Smoothassilkiftheythinkitwillget’emwhattheywant.”“Anddidhegetwhathe
wanted?”Samasked.“YoumeandidItellhim
wheretofindCarrie?”Sheshrugged.“IfIhadn’t,someoneelsewouldhave.Of
course,IdiddirecthimuptoMick’splace,nottothedaycare.LethimdoalittleexplainingtoCarrie’sgrandfather,ifhewantstogettoher.”Impulsively,Samplanteda
kissonSally’scheek.“Youtrulyareatreasure.”“Noquestionaboutit,”she
said,laughing.“Nowtakeyourlunchandgo.Ifyoudon’tmindapieceofadvice,
IsuggestyoueatitwithCarrieatthedaycare,insteadofgoingbacktoyourownofficeandstewingallafternoon.”“YousuggestingIshould
stakemyclaim?”“Itwouldn’thurt.Iputan
extrasandwichinthere,justincaseyouhavemoresensethanpride.”Samnodded.“I’ll
definitelytakethatunder
advisement.”“Seethatyoudo.”Samleftthecafé,then
drewinadeepbreath,fillinghislungswiththecleansaltyair.Thisfresh,invigoratingairwassomethingCarriewouldn’tgetifshejettedoffacrosstheglobeagain.Whowashe,though,totrytostandinherway?WhatcouldheofferthatthisMarcReynoldscouldn’tofferahundred
timesover?Reasontoldhimtolook
around.ChesapeakeShoreswaswhatsheclaimedtowant.Sheseemedtohavedeepfeelingsforhim,too.AndshecertainlyhadfeelingsforBobby.Family,sheclaimedwashertoppriority,andhernewday-carecenterpromisedadeepsenseofprofessionalfulfillment.Wasthatenough?Itwould
beforthewomanhethoughthe’dcometoknow.Justincaseyouhavemore
sensethanpride.Sally’swordsranginhishead,tauntinghim.Hewantedtobelievehedid,buthealsohadahealthyrespectforbeingrealistic.ThismightbeCarrie’schancetograbeverythingshe’dlost.Andifthat’swhatsheneeded,whatshewanted,hewasn’tgoing
tobetheonetotrytostopher,eventhoughinhisopinionMarcReynoldshadalreadyshownhimselftobeunworthyofawomanwithCarrie’skindnessandgenerosity.Ifhehadthechance,he’dtellherthat,too.Hetookyetanotherdeep,
cleansingbreathandturnedtowardthenewspaperoffice.Iftheyweregoingtomakeit,hehadtotrustCarrietomake
therightchoice.Hehadtohavefaiththatshewouldchoosehim—andfamilyandhome—overflashandglamour.Butasstrongashisfaithin
hermightbe,itwasgoingtobeaverylongafternoon.
***
Mickhadgoneoutsidewithhisfather’spipeandwas
enjoyingthefallafternoon,whenthebigblackSUVdroveup.Hisgazenarrowedasherecognizedtheperfectlygroomedmanwhoclimbedoutoftheback,everyhairinplace,hisclothesimpeccable.Mick’sbloodpromptlycametoaboil,buthecouldhearMegan’svoiceinhisheadtellinghimtowaitandseewhatthedesignerwantedbeforekickinghimoffhis
landandoutoftown.“Mr.O’Brien?”“That’sme,”Mick
confirmed.“WhatcanIdoforyou,Mr.Reynolds?”Theman’sexpression
didn’tregistersomuchasahintofsurprise.Clearlyheexpectedtoberecognizedwhereverhewent.Anotherblackmark,inMick’sopinion.“I’mlookingforCarrie.”
“Oh?Alittlelateforthat,isn’tit?”Thedirectremarkhitits
target.Reynoldslookedtakenaback.“Lettingherleavewasa
foolishdecisiononmypart,”heconceded.“I’mafraidIunderestimatedhervaluetomybusiness.”“Butnottoyou?”Themanlooked
completelybefuddledbythe
question,whichtoldMickallheneededtoknow.MarcReynoldshadn’tshownupherebecausehe’ddiscoveredsomedeep,abidingloveforCarrie.Hewasherebecauseofwhatshecoulddoforhim.Well,notifMickhadanythingtosayaboutit.Nomanwasgoingtogetasecondchancetobreakhisgirl’sheart.“Idoubtshe’sinterestedin
anythingyou’reoffering,”Micktoldhim.“Shouldn’tyoulether
decidethatforherself?”“Morethanlikely,”Mick
said,takingalongdrawonhispipeandreleasingthefragrantsmokeintotheair.“ButI’mcomfortablewithtellingyoutogetoutofmytownandoutofmygirl’slife.”“MickO’Brien!”
Mickwinced.Unfortunatelyhehadn’ttakenintoaccountthatMawasinside.Apparentlyshe’doverheardenoughtoguesstheidentityoftheirunwantedguestandtofigureoutwhatMickwasupto.MarcReynolds’sgaze
immediatelywenttoNell,whoemergedfromthehouseandwasregardingbothofthemwithdispleasure.
“YoumustbeCarrie’sgreat-grandmother.Nell,isn’tthatright?”“Iam.”“I’veheardalotaboutyou,
aboutallofyou.FamilymeanstheworldtoCarrie.”“Nowthat’sthefirstthing
we’veagreedon,”Micksaid.“WhichiswhyshebelongsrighthereinChesapeakeShores.”Maputahandonhis
shoulder.“Sheknowsthat,Mick.ButsheneedstobetheonetoexplainittoMr.Reynolds.I’dsaythetwoofthemhavesomeunfinishedbusiness.”Mickfrownedatthat.“If
themanwereherebecausehewantedtotellherhewasinlovewithher,Imightagree,butthat’snotit,isit,Mr.Reynolds?Hewantshertocomebackandbehis
workhorseagain,thewayshewasbefore.”“IimagineCarriewillbe
smartenoughtounderstandthedistinction,”Nellsaid.“Andifit’sajobshewantstogobackto,we’llhavetolivewiththat.”“Ma!”Nellignoredhim.“Mr.
Reynolds,IthinkifyoutrulywantourCarriebackworkingforyou,you’llneedto
improveyourpresentation.She’snotasgullibleassheoncewas.IsuggestyouspendthenightattheInnatEaglePointandputyourbestproposalonpaper.We’llletCarrieknowyou’reintownand,ifshe’sinterested,she’llmeetyouinthediningroomtherefirstthingtomorrowmorning.”“Idon’thavetimefor
this,”thedesignersnapped
impatiently.“I’vecomeallthewayfromNewYorkasitis.I’mscheduledtoflytoMilantomorrow.”“I’msureyouhavean
assistantwhocanchangeyourtravelarrangements,”Nellsaidmildly.“Idon’t,”hegrumbled.
“That’sthesortofthingthatCarriehandled.Thelasttwopeopleinthatpositionquit.”“It’ssodifficulttofind
competenthelpthesedays,isn’tit?”Nellsaidsympathetically.“Littlewonderyou’dlikeourCarrieback.Makesureyoutellherhowvaluableshewastoyou.I’msurethatwillmakeanimpression.”Seeminglyresignedto
followingNell’ssuggestion,Reynoldsasked,“Where’sthisinnyoumentioned?”Mickgavehimdirections,
thenwatchedhimleavebeforeturninghisgazeonhismother.“You’realotsneakierthan
Igaveyoucreditforbeing.Youknowifhestartslistingallthelittlemenialtaskshewantshertodo,Carriewillthrowhisofferbackinhisface.”“Ithinkshe’ssmartenough
toseethathe’slookingforoneofthosegoferpeople,”
Nellagreed.“He’snotinterestedinthekindofrelationshipCarriethoughtshewantedwithhim.Ialsothinkshe’ssmartenoughtorecognizethatSamistwicethemanMarcReynoldsis,thatshe’llhavearealpartnershipwithhim.Andthatherworkhere—abusinessshe’sbuildingonherownfromthegroundup—willfulfillherinwaysthat
jobwithMarcReynoldsneverdid.”“It’sabigrisk,”Micksaid.
“Lettinghimdanglemoneyandafancylifestyleinfrontofher.”“Shehadallthatonceand
shestillcamehome,”Nellremindedhim.“Becausethatjerkbroke
herheart,”Mickcountered.“No,becausesheknewit
waswhereshebelonged.If
she’donlycometolickherwoundsforabit,wouldshebeopeningaday-carecenter?No,she’dhavebeenonaplanebacktoEuropewithinamonth.Therewereotherdesignersshecouldhaveworkedfor,ifthat’swhatshetrulywanted.”“Ihopeyou’reright,”Mick
said.“Otherthanyou,doyou
knowofasinglepersonin
thisfamilywhoknowswhat’sintheheartsofouryoungonesbetterthanIdo?”Micksmiled.“Nowthat
youmentionit,no.”“Thentrustme.Carriewill
sendhimonhisway,thatisifsheshowsupforthatmeetingatall.”“Yougoingtotellherhe’s
attheinnwaitingtohearfromher?”Nellseemedtogivethe
questionasurprisingamountofthought,thenshrugged.“CouldbeI’lljustleaveittofate.Youdothesame.Wecanconsideritatestofthatgrapevinethistownisreputedtohave.”Withthatshewalkeddown
thestepsandheadedacrossthelawntowardherowncottage.Fate?Mickstaredafterher.
OrtheChesapeakeShores
grapevine?Ma’ssneakinessquotientjusttickedupanothernotch.
***
“So,haveyoumadeyourdecision?Areyouleaving?”SamaskedCarriewhenhesawherinfrontofherhouseashewasheadinghomefromwork.Shewasonherkneespullingweeds,astreakofdirt
onherface.Hewantedtodragherintohisarmsandbeghertostay.Instead,hewaitedforherreply.Sheregardedhim
curiously.“Leaving?Ihavenoideawhatyou’retalkingabout.I’mnotplanningatrip.”“Imeantforgood.That’s
whyMarcReynoldswasheretoday,wasn’tit?Tolureyouintocomingbacktohim?”
Shesatbackonherheelsandstared,clearlystartled.“Sam,IneversawMarc,andevenifIhad,Icertainlywouldn’tbegoinganywherewithhim.Thatpartofmylifeisoveranddonewith.I’mexactlywhereIwanttobe.”Hergazenarrowed.“IthoughtyouunderstoodhowimportantyouandBobbyarebecominginmylife,howdeterminedIamtomakethis
day-carecenterasuccess.”ReliefwashedoverSam,
buthestillhadthistiny,nigglingdoubttormentinghim.“Howcanyousaythatwithsuchcertainty,ifyoudon’tknowwhathewasoffering?”heasked,thoughitdidstrikehimasoddthatthedesignerapparentlyhadn’tevenspokentoher.WasthatMick’sdoing?“Icansayitbecauseit
doesn’tmatterwhatheoffers.I’mnotgoinganywhere.”Shestudiedhimcuriously.“Sam,howdoyouevenknowthatMarcwasintown?Didyourunintohim?DidhesaysomethingtomakeyouthinkI’dbejettingoffwithhim?”Regrettingthathe’d
openedawholecanofwormsthathadsomehowbeenleftontheshelfbyeveryoneelseinvolved,Samexplained
aboutMarc’svisittoSally’sandtheensuingexcitement.“That’swhenIwalkedin.I
neverseteyesonhimmyself.Sallysaidshepointedhiminyourgrandfather’sdirection.”Carrieappearedtaken
abackyetagain,butthenherlipscurved.Nextthingheknew,shewaslaughing.“I’llbetthatmeetingwentwell.NowonderIhaven’tseenMarc.Iprobablyneedto
investigatetomakesurehe’sstillinonepiece.”“Youdon’tseemoverly
concernedaboutwhetherheisornot,”Samsaid.Thistimehewasabletobaskinthereliefthatwashedoverhim.“There’salmostnothing
mygrandfathercoulddo,shortofmurder,thatMarcdoesn’tdeserve,”shesaid,asurprisinglybloodthirstynote
inhervoice.Thenshesighed.“ButIreallyshouldchecktoseewhat’sgoingon.”Justthenhercellphone
rang.SheglancedatcallerID,thentookthecall.“Hey,Jess.What’sgoingon?”Shelistenedtoheraunt,
anothersmilespreadingacrossherface.“Yes,youcanshort-sheethisbed,andno,Iwon’tbeinit.”Shedisconnectedthecall
andgrinnedatSam.“Mysterysolved.Gramdispatchedhimtotheinntoworkonaproperpresentationtomaketomeinthemorning.Jesssayshe’sexpectingmeatnine.”“Yougoingtobethere?”Shesteppedcloser,
strippedoffhergardeningglovesandframedhisfacewithbothhands.“Yes,”shesaid,causinghishearttosink.“Okay,Iguessyouneedto
hearhimout,”Samsaid,deflated.“I’mnotgoingtohearhim
out,”Carriecorrected.“I’mgoingtotellhimgoodbyeonceandforall.ThenI’mgoingtofindyouandkissyousenseless,tillyourealizeyou’retheonlymanIwantinmylifenow.”Samsmiledatlast.Now
therewasaplanhecoulddefinitelygetbehind.
“Sticktoyourguns,okay?I’dhatetohavetofindhimandbeatthetaroutofhimforhurtingyouagain.”“You’dprobablyhaveto
getinlinetodothat,”shesaid.“ButIlovethatyou’rewillingtogothatfartoprotectme.”“I’llgoasfarasIhaveto,”
hepromisedherquietly.SheandBobbywerehislife.Asmuchasitsurprisedhim,he
knewhe’ddowhateverittooktokeepthembothsafeandhappy.
22
Carriestoodinthedoorwaytotheinn’sdiningroomandstudiedthemanshe’doncethoughtsheloved.ThesightofMarcnolongermovedherasitoncehad.Itseemedshe’drecentlyfallenforaguywhoseshirtwasrarelytucked
in,whoseideaoffashionwasaformfittingT-shirtthatthesedayswasmostoftensmearedwithjellyandwhosehairwasusuallyinneedofatrim.Samwasamanwhoseworldhadbeenshakenbyloss,andthenturnedupsidedownbyinstantparenthood,andyethe’dfoundawaytocope.Marccouldn’tcopewithmakinghisownairlinereservations.
Infact,Samwasquiteacontrasttothemansittingatatablebythewindow,hisattentionfocusedonhistablet,ratherthanthespectacularviewoutside.Marcapparentlycouldn’tevendealwiththelossofanassistantwithpublic-relationsskills,thoughCarriehadtowonderifitwasthoseskillshemissedorherall-aroundadorationandtwenty-four-
houravailabilityforanyandalltasksthatmadehislifeeasier.Nowhewastapping
impatientlyonthetabletscreen,hisbrowknitwithafrown.Hewastooabsorbedtonoticeherapproach.“Iheardyouwantedtosee
me,”shesaid,pullingoutachairandsittingacrossfromhim.Heglancedupatthat,
delightspreadingacrosshisface.Shehadnodoubtthatmuchatleastwasgenuine.Ifheneededher,whichwastheonlyexplanationforhisarrivalinChesapeakeShores,thenhe’dbeallbutcertainshe’drespondtohisdistresscallandturnherlifeinsideouttoaccommodatehim.He’dnodoubtdismissedhercontinuedavoidanceofhiscalls,consideringthattobe
nomorethananinsignificantfitofpique.“Youlookgreat!”hesaid,
hisgazeintent.“Idon’trecognizethedesigner,though.Whoselineareyouwearing?”“Noidea,”shesaidwitha
disinterestedshrug.“Iboughttheclothesbecausethey’repracticalforwork.”Helookedstartled.“You
haveanotherjob?Ihadn’t
heard.”“I’mnotsurprised.News
ofmyopeningaday-carecenterwouldn’tlikelybeonyourradar.”Hefrownedatthat.“A
day-carecenter?Youmeanforchildren?”“That’susuallywho
they’remeantfor,”shesaid,smilingathisreaction.“Holdon,you’regoingto
beapaidbabysitter?”he
askedincredulously.Shedidn’tbothertaking
offense.“It’salittlemoremeaningfulthanthat,butbasically,yes.Ishouldthankyou.Haditnotbeenforthewholefiascowithyou,IneverwouldhaverecognizedwhatIwasmeanttodo.”“Takingcareofother
people’schildrenisnotyourcalling,”hescoffed.“Ifyouthinkthat,you’rejustsettling.
Youweremeantformuchmore.”“Suchasmakingyour
airlinereservations,dealingwiththemedia,plantinglittleitemsinthegossipcolumnstokeepyournameoutthere?”“Ofcourse.Allofthatis
almostasessentialinthefashionindustryasthedesignsthemselves.”“Andnoone’sbeenableto
fillthatnicheforyoutheway
Idid?Iassumethat’swhyyou’rehere.YoudiscoveredI’mindispensable?Orweremyreplacementstoodemanding?Maybetheyexpectedtimeoff?Orweren’twillingtogoalongwiththebedroomperks?”Helookedstartledbyher
sarcastictone.“Ithoughtyoulovedyourjob.”“Ilovedyou,youidiot!
AndIdidthejobexceedingly
welltotrytogetyourattention.”“Well,youhaveitnow.I
wantyoutocomebacktoworkforme,Carrie.Ineedyou.There,Isaidit.Doesthatmakeyouhappy,knowingIcan’tfunctionwithoutyou?Iwasfoolishtoletyouleave,especiallyoversomeschoolgirlcrushyouthoughtyouhadonme.”Sheregardedhimwith
shock.“That’swhatyouthinkitwas,aschoolgirlcrush?”Shesighedandshookherhead.“Thatcertainlyexplainsalot.”“Meaning?”“Ittellsmethekindofman
youare.Youtookadvantageofawomanyouthoughthadasilly,meaninglesscrushsimplytomakeyourlifeeasier.”Sheshookherhead.“HowcouldIpossiblyhave
beensoblind?”Hewincedatthescathing
noteinhervoice.Hefinallyseemedtorealizeshewasn’tgoingtofallintolinequitesoreadilyandchangedtactics.“Okay,Iadmitit.Ididn’ttreatyouwell.Iwascarelesswithyourfeelings.Itwon’thappenagain,Carrie.”Shesighedathispitiful
attempttoappearcontrite.“Asapologiesgo,thatone
lackedacertainamountofsincerity,”shesaid.“Butyouarerightaboutonething.Itwon’thappenagain,becauseI’mnotcomingback,Marc.”Hewavedoffthe
statement.“Ofcourseyouare.I’mpreparedtomakeaverygenerousoffer,muchmorethanyouweremakingbefore.It’scertainlymorethanyou’llevermakeasababysitter.”
“Marc,there’snotenoughmoneyintheworldtopersuademetocomebackandbeoneoftheminorplanetsorbitingaroundyou,”shesaid,standing.“Ihopeyoutakethetimetolookaroundtownwhileyou’rehere.It’sagreatplaceandit’sfilledwithpeoplewhoknowwhat’simportantinlife.Goodbye,Marc.”Sheturnedonherheeland
walkedaway.Thistimeshedidn’tlookback.Nordidshehaveasingleregret.ShecouldhardlywaittofindSamandmakegoodonherpromise.Kissinghimsenselesswouldwipethisdepressingencounterrightoutofherhead.
***
“Thanksformeetingme
here,”ConnortoldMackastheysatonthedeckatBrady’s.Thefirstcrisphintoffallwasintheairandthewarmthofthesunfeltgood.“Whyarewehereinstead
ofinyouroffice?”Mackasked.“OratthepuborSally’s?”“BecauseIwantedthis
conversationtobeprivate.Ifyou’dstoppedbytheoffice,someonemighthavegotten
windofit,andifwe’dmetatthepuborthecafé,wordwouldhavespreadinananosecond.Evenmorelikely,someoneinthefamilywouldhavejoinedus.”Mackstudiedhimintently.
“You’resoundingawfullymysterious.What’sgoingon?”“Ihavenews,”Connor
said.“AndI’mnotsurehowyou’regoingtofeelaboutit,
muchlesshowSusiewillreact.”Macksawexactlywhere
thiswasheading.“Anotheradoption?Susie’sdefinitelynotreadytoconsiderthat,Connor.She’sbetter,butshe’sstillreelingfromlasttime.”“It’snotexactlyanother
adoption,”Connorsaid.Hedrewinadeepbreath.“Letmejustgetthisout.The
motherchangedhermindagain.Thingsdidn’tworkoutwiththeboyfriend,andonceagain,she’sdecidedshe’snotcutoutformotherhood.Shecalledmyformerlawofficeandsaidshewantedtogothroughwiththeadoption.”Jawdropping,Mack
simplystaredathim.Whenhecouldfinallygatherhisthoughts,histemperkickedin.“Areyoukiddingme?
Whyinheaven’snamewouldwetakeanotherchancewithher?Sheclearlyhasnoideawhatshewants.Ican’taskSusietoagreetothis,maybeeventobringthatbabygirlhome,andhavethiswomanchangehermindyetagain.HavingthatbabyliterallyrippedoutofherarmsthistimewouldbethefinalstrawforSusie.”“Iknow,”Connoragreed,
histonequietlyreasonable,asharpcontrasttoMack’sincensedreaction.“It’saterriblerisk,andtherearenoguarantees.Therecouldverywellbemaneuveringroominthelawforhertodecideagainthatshewantstokeepherbaby.”HeleveledalookintoMack’seyes.“Buthere’sthething—thisbabyisreal.It’savailable.ItneedsthesortoflovinghomeyouandSusie
couldprovide.”“Forthemoment,”Mack
saiddirely.“Yes,forthemoment,”
Connoragreed.“Letsomebodyelseface
theprospectofheartbreak,”Macksaidheatedly.“Wecan’tdothattoSusieagain.”“Areyousure?Areyou
100percentcertaintheriskisn’tworthit?”Connorsighed.“I’mreallynottrying
tosellyouonthis.Ithastobeyourdecision,Mack.YouknowSusiebetterthananyofus.”Mackrakedahandthrough
hishairandregardedConnorwithdismay.“WhatamIsupposedtodo?Ican’tbearthethoughtofSusiehurtinglikethiseveragain.”“Orthiscouldbethebest
thingthateverhappened,”Connorsaidandreachedinto
hispocket.HepushedasmallsquareofpaperinMack’sdirection.Mackflippeditoverand
sawasweetlittlefacewithatinybowofamouth,hugebrowneyesandafluffofdarkhairwithapinkbowonanelasticribbon.Hedrewinasharpbreathandsomethinginhisheartturnedover.“Thisisher?”Connornodded.
“She’sbeautiful,”Mackwhispered,awedbythepossibilitythatshecouldbehisdaughter.Ifhewasthistakenwithherafteronlyaglimpse,howwouldSusiefeel?Couldhedenyhertherighttomakethisdecisionforherself,eventhoughitcamefraughtwithperil?“Connor,whatamIsupposedtodo?”“Takethatpicturehome
andtalktoyourwife,”
Connorsaidquietly.“Youknowthat’stheonlyrealchoiceyouhave.”“Isthereanywaywecan
protectourselvesthistime?”Mackasked.“Anywaytomakethisdecisionbindingandscrapthewaitingperiodwhenthemomcansuddenlytakeherfromus?”“Icantry,giventhe
circumstances.Icanmakeastrongcasefornotallowing
youtogetburnedtwice,butthelawreallydoesgivethebirthmotherafairamountofprotection.”“Evenaftershe’sproved
herimmaturity?”Macksaid.“LikeIsaid,Icantry.”Macktouchedafingerto
thattiny,preciousface,thenpickedupthephotoandtuckeditintohispocket.Hestoodup.“I’llletyouknow.”“Don’twaittoolong,”
Connorwarned.“Herattorneywantstomoveonthis,getthebabysettledintoagoodhome.”Mackcouldn’tseemto
preventahintofbitternessfromcreepingintohisvoice.“Anyhomewouldhavetobebetterthanwheresheisrightnow.”“Beforeyoujudgethe
momtooharshly,thinkaboutthis.Shereallyistryingtodo
rightbyherbaby.AndyouandSusiecouldbethebeneficiaryofthat.”Macksighed.“You’re
right.I’lltrytokeepthatinmind.”
***
Athome,whilehewaitedforSusietogetthere,MackopenedthedoortothenurserySusiehaddecorated
withsomuchjoyandhopejustafewmonthsearlier.Unlessshe’dgoneintherewhenhewasn’taround,ithadstoodemptyeversinceshe’dslammedthedoorshutonthedaythey’dgottenthenewsthatthebabywouldn’tbecominghomewiththem.Andnowhewasaboutto
askhertogetbackontothatemotionalrollercoaster,evenknowinghowfragileher
recoverywas.Heheardthefrontdoor
openandclose,thenheardhercallinghisname.“Backhere,”hecalledout.HeheardSusie’sfootsteps
gettingcloser,thennothing.Heturnedandsawherattheendofthehall,unableorunwillingtocomeintotheroomthey’ddecoratedasanursery.“Whyareyouthere?”she
asked.“Pleasedonottellmeit’stimetodismantlethenursery,Mack.IknowI’vebeenstruggling,butI’mdoingthebestIcan.Ican’tfacethatroomyet.”“Please,”hesaid,andheld
outhishand.“Please,Suze.That’snotwhatI’masking,butwedoneedtotalk.Ithinkweneedtodoithere.”Shehesitatedforwhat
seemedlikeaneternitybefore
finallyapproaching.Evenaftershejoinedhim,shekeptherbacktotheroom.“IspoketoConnor
earlier,”hesaid,holdinghergaze.“Themomhasdecidedtogiveherbabyupforadoption,afterall.”Susiestaredathim,clearly
notcomprehending.“Whatdoesthatmean?”“Thebabycouldbeours,
Susie.”Heletthethought
hangintheair,triedtogaugeherreaction,butherexpressiongaveawaynothing.“Butwehavetobewillingtotakeanotherchance.Itdoesn’tcomewithguarantees,thoughConnorsayshe’lltrytomakeitassolidashecan.”Hedrewthepictureoutofhispocketandhandedittoher.Shereactedthen.Tears
filledhereyesandspilled
downhercheeks.“Oh,myGod,”shewhispered,thenliftedhereyestolookintohis.“Shereallycouldbeours,afterall?When?”“Assoonasweagree,I
think.ConnorandIdidn’ttalkaboutthat.Iwasn’teven100percentsureIshouldtellyou.Idon’tthinkIcouldbearitifyougotyourheartbrokenagain.”Shestudiedthepicture
intently,thenasked,“Howcanwesayno,Mack?”Whenshelookedupfromthepicture,hereyeswereshining.“Thislittlegirlcouldbeours.Fate’sgivingusasecondchance.”Hestudiedherfaceand
sawtheSusiehe’dfalleninlovewith,theonewhoalmostalwayslethopeandoptimismoutshinedespair.“Areyousurethisiswhatyouwant,
evenafterwhatyou’vebeenthrough?IknowI’vebeenencouragingyoutoconsideradoptionagain,butthismom,youknowshecouldbeabadriskwhenitcomestostickingwithherdecision.”“Mack,Iwantsobadlyto
holdababyinmyarms.Iwantustohaveafamilyandthisisourchance.Ithinkthiswasmeanttobe.Ihavetobelievethat.”
“Andyou’restrongenoughtodealwithit,ifitturnsoutyou’rewrong?”Hepulledherclose,restedhischinonherhead.“BecauseIcan’tloseyouoverthis,Suze.You’remyworld.”“Andyou’remine.You
alwayshavebeen.Ithinkwecanmakeroominitforonemore.”Macksawnowayaround
it.Asterrifiedashewasofa
repeatofthelasttime,ifthisbabywaswhatSusieneeded,he’dputhisownfearsasideandmoveheavenandearthtoseethatithappened.Hethoughtofthefaceinthattinyphotographandthepowerfulpullhe’dfeltashe’dstaredintothosesolemnbrowneyes.“I’llcallConnor,”hesaid.
“Whydon’tyouopenthewindowsandgetalittlefresh
airintothisroom?”Whilehemadethecall,he
watchedasSusieopenedwindows,thenmovedaroundtheroom,touchingthemobileoverthecribtosetthelittlebunniesintomotion,thentakingaruffledpinkdressfromtherackinsideawhitewardrobeandholdingittoherface.Shepickedupapaleyellowonesienext,thenastuffedbunny,allthewhile
withtearsstreaming.Mackdisconnectedthecall
andwenttohiswife.“Connorthinkshecanmakethearrangementsfortomorrow.”Hergazeshotup.“That
soon?”“Soon?”hesaid.“Itfeels
asifwe’vebeenwaitingforever.”“You’reright,butanhour
agowedidn’tthinkitwaspossible.Nowwehavetobe
readybytomorrow.”Macklookedaroundthe
perfectnursery.“Ithinkwehaveprettymucheverythingweneed.”“ButIneedtocall
everyone.We’llwanttohavethefamilyheretomeether,”shesaidexcitedly.Thenherfacefell.“Ormaybenot.”Mackknewexactlywhat
shewasthinking.“Itwon’tbelikelasttime,Suze.”No
matterwhathehadtodo,hewouldmakesureofthat.Thistimetheywouldbringababyhome.“StillIthinkwe’dbetter
waitbeforeplanninganything,”shesaid,herapprehensionplain.Herexpressionhadlosta
littleofitsspark.Mackcouldunderstandthat.Hisownstomachwasinturmoil.Ifitwaspossibleforhopeand
dreadtocoexist,that’swhatwasgoingoninsidehimrightnow.Andifhefeltthisway,itwouldbequadrupledforSusie.Please,God,letitworkout
thistime,heprayedsilently.SincehiscommunicationswithGodwereprettyrare,hewastemptedtocallNellandgetheronthecase,butthey’djustagreedtokeepthisnewstothemselvesalittlelonger.
Hopefullyhisheartfeltpleawouldbeenoughjustthisonce.
***
SamwatchedwarilyasCarriewanderedaroundhislivingroom,straighteningthis,examiningthat.Shewasclearlyonedge,thoughhehadnoideawhy.She’dalreadytoldhimshe’dsent
MarcReynoldsonhiswayacouplehoursearlier,sothatwasbehindher.Wasshehavingsecondthoughtsalready?“Bobby’sinschool?”she
askedeventually.“Heleftacoupleofhours
ago,”Samsaid.Surelyshealreadyknewthat,givenitwasmidmorning.“Thenwe’realone?”Suddenlyheunderstood
hernerves.Theywerealonewithnolikelyinterruptions.“Wearealone,”hesaid,walkingacrosstheroomtojoinher.“Andyoudon’thavetobe
atworkrightaway?”“Nottillmuch,much
later,”heconfirmed.“You?”“IfIspendanotherminute
goingoverthesamepapersforthehundredthtimeorcheckingthesupplies,Imight
losemymind,”sheadmitted.“I’masreadytoopenasI’mgoingtobe.”“Interesting,”hesaid,
runninghisfingeralongthecurveofherjaw.“Herewebothare,allalone,atlooseends.Whatdoyousupposeweshoulddo?”Hergazeheldhis.“Ifyou
don’tcomeupwithanideaprettydarnquickly,you’renotthemanIthoughtyou
were.”Samlaughedandscooped
herintohisarms,butinsteadofheadingforabedroom,hesatonthesofa,Carriesnuggledinhislap.Sheregardedhimwith
obviousdisappointment.“Seriously?”“Iamnotgoingtodrag
youofftomyroomtomakelovefortheveryfirsttimejustbecausewebothhave
sometimetokill,”hesaid.“That’snowaytotreatalady.”“Areyousure?Theidea
holdsalotofappealtome.IthoughtyouwereasfrustratedasIam.”“Believeme,I’mplenty
frustrated,”Samsaidwithheartfeltemotion.Infact,ifshekeptwigglingaround,shewasgoingtodiscoverjusthowreadyhewastotakethe
nextstep.“I’mtryingtoplayfair.You’renotthekindofwomanamanjustravisheswithoutthinkingoftheconsequences.”Hereyesnarrowed.“Are
wetalkingaboutcondoms?”Thistimeherexpression
wassofilledwithdisbeliefthatSamresistedthedesiretolaugh.“No,we’reokayonthecondomfront.”“Thenwhat
consequences?”“Carrie,whatdoessleeping
withmemeantoyou?”“Itmeanswhatitwouldto
anywoman,”shesaidimpatiently,“thatwe’regettingcloser,ascloseastwopeoplecanbe.And,believeme,I’mawarethatitdoesn’talwaysmeanthesamethingtomen.Ilearnedthatthehardwayfromtheverymanwhotriedtoenticemebackinto
hislifeearlierthismorning.”“Andthat’swhyIwantto
besureyouandIareonthesamepagebeforewetakethatstep.ItwouldkillmetothinkthatI’dhurtyouthewayMarcReynoldsdid.”“Youcouldn’tpossiblydo
that,unlessyou’vebeensecretlyseeingsomemodelIdon’tknowabout.”“You’retheonlywoman
I’mseeing,theonlywomanI
wantinmylife,”hesaidwithcompletesincerity.“Thenyou’remakingthisa
lotmorecomplicatedthanitneedstobe,”shesaid.Samknewwhathewas
abouttosaywaslikelygoingtogetthissexy,wonderfulwomannotonlyoutofhisarms,butlikelyoutthedoor.Still,hehadtobehonestwithher.Cardsonthetable,andallthat.
“IfIwereremotelyreadytotakethenextstep,”hesaid.“Youmeansex?”“Imeanmarriage.”Hereyeswidened.“When
didmarriageenterintothis?”“Rightnow,oratleastit
shouldhave.You’rethekindofwomanwhodeservestowalkdowntheaisleinagorgeouswhitegownwithyourwholefamilylookingon.Iwantthatforyou.”
“Okay,”shesaidslowly.“But?”“I’mnotsureIcanbethe
guywho’swaitingforyouatthefrontofthechapel.”Shewasonherfeetina
heartbeat,justashe’dpredicted,lookinggloriousinheranger.“HaveIsaidonesingle
wordaboutmarriage?HaveIhintedthatIneedaringonmyfinger?Orthatyou’dbe
themanIwanttoputitthere?No,Ihavenot!I’mnomorereadyforthatthanyouare.”Shestartedtopace.“How
couldIhavedonethistwice?”sheaskedofnooneinparticular.“Donewhattwice?”Sam
asked,confused.“Falleninlovewitha
completeidiot.”Whenhestaredatherin
shock,shewavedhimoff
withanimpatientgesture.“Oh,don’tgogettingyourselfallworkedup.Imightloveyou,butI’mnotsomeclingingvinewhoneedsheartsandflowersandromanceeveryminuteofeveryday.Ineedapartnerwhovaluesme.IneedamanwhowantswhatIwant,whoknowstheimportanceoffamily.Ithoughtthatmightbeyou.Maybeyou’renotthe
onewho’sanidiot.Maybeit’sme,afterall.”“Youarenotanidiot,”
Samsaidforcefully.“Thejury’sprobablystilloutonme.I’mjusttryingtodotherightthing.”“Yeah,youwanttobefair.
Youdon’twanttotakeadvantageofmeunderfalsepretenses.Igetit.You’renoble.”Shemadeitsoundasifthat
wastheworstthingintheworldhecouldpossiblybe.Since,atthemoment,itwaskeepingheroutofhisbed,wheretheybothwantedtobe,maybeshewasright.Chinheldhigh,sheleveled
alookathim.“Callmewhenyoudecideyou’rereadytotakethenextstep.Ifyou’revery,verylucky,maybeI’llstillbeavailable.”Andthenshewasgone,
justasSamhadalsopredicted.He’ddonetherightthingjustnow.Heknewinhisheartthathehad.He’dbeenhonest.Sowhydiditfeelasifit
hadcosthimeverythinghe’deverwanted?
23
Carrieopenedherkitchencupboards,whichwerefilledwithfamilycastoffs,andtriedtochooseadishshewasn’toverlyfondof,somethingdispensable,somethingshewouldn’tregretsmashingintoathousandpieces.
Hergazefellonagravyboat.Whoneededagravyboat?Nother,sinceshehadn’tcookedamealrequiringgravyevenonceinherentirelife.GravywasNell’sdomain,aswerethemashedpotatoesandeverythingelsethattastedbetterwhencoveredwithrich,flavorfulgravy.HerattempttomakegravyunderNell’stutelagehadn’tgone
allthatwell.Shedoubtedshe’drepeatit.Sheyankedthepieceoff
theshelfandtestedtheweightinherhand,delightedtodiscoveritwasn’tsomekindofdelicateporcelain,butrathersomethingsubstantialthatwouldmakeasatisfyingcrashagainstthewall.Toobadshecouldn’ttossitstraightatSam’shardhead.Wasn’titenoughthatshe’d
hadtodealwithMarcagainfirstthingthismorningandsendhimonhisway?HadshereallyneededSamgoingallnobleonherandrefusingtosleepwithherbecausehewasn’treadyformarriage,wasn’tsureheeverwouldbe?Really?Whatmanrefused
whenawillingwomanwasstretchedacrosshislap?Itwasn’tasifhe’dbeen
immunetoher,either.Thatwouldhaveopenedawholeotherkettleoffish,butsheknewhewantedherjustasbadlyasshe’dwantedhim.There’dbeennomistakingtheevidenceofthat.So,hewasanidiotora
saint.Becauseitsuitedhermood,shewasgoingwithidiot!Sayingamentalgoodbyetothegravyboat,shehurleditatthewall,
whereitshatteredsothoroughly,gavehersuchsatisfactionthatshegrabbedblindlyforsomethingelse,anythingelsethatmightgetthisfitoftemperoutofhersystem.Shepulledbackherarmto
throwasillysouvenirmugfromParis—twobirdswithonemug,sotospeak,sinceMarchadboughtthestupidthingforher—whenshe
heardhermom’svoice.“Sothisiswhyyoudidn’t
answerthedoorwhenIknocked,”Abbysaid,lookingattheshardsofpotteryonthefloorandthemugstillgrippedtightlyinCarrie’shand.“Havingabadday?”Abbypluckedthemugout
ofdanger,thenwalkedtothepotofcoffeethatwasstillwarmonthekitchencounterandfilledthemug.“Thinkof
thisasgivingitonelastusefulmomentbeforeyoudestroyit,”shesaid.Carriestudiedhermother
withasuspiciousgaze.“Mom,whatareyoudoinghere?Idon’timagineyoucametorescuemydishes.”“IheardMarcwasintown.
Jesssaidyouhadquitethemeetingattheinn.Ithoughtyoumightneedtotalk.”Carriewavedofftheentire
confrontationwithMarc.“Itdoesn’tmatter.Hedoesn’tmatter.”“Goodtoknow,”Abby
saidwithsatisfaction,studyingCarrieovertherimofthemugasshetookaleisurelysipofcoffee.“So,”sheaskedeventually,“theshatteredpotteryhasnothingtodowithMarc?”“Nope.”“Nomoreunresolved
feelings,nomorelongingforwhatyouoncehad?”Carrieactuallyshuddered.
“Notevenatinybit.”“I’mgladtohearit,”Abby
said.“Hewasn’tworthyofyou.”ShestudiedCarrieforanotherminute,thensaidoh-so-innocently,“So,thismustbeaboutSam.”Carriefrowned.“Why
mustitbeaboutSam?Whydoesithavetobeaboutany
man?MaybeI’mjusthavingalousyday.MaybeIfailedaninspectionattheday-carecenter.MaybeGrandpaMickmademecrazierthanusual.”Hermothermadeavaliant
efforttohideasmile,butfailedmiserably.“Okay,that’sfairenough.Ijumpedtoaconclusion.I’llrephrase.Whatbroughtonthismood?”Carriedidn’tappreciatethe
oh-so-patient,patronizing
tone,especiallysincetheybothknewwhatherresponsewasgoingtobe.“Sam,ofcourse.”Beforehermomcouldgloat,sheadded,“ButIdon’twantittobeaboutSam.Idon’twantittobeaboutmefallingforyetanothermanI’veapparentlybeenreadingallwrong.Marcaccusedmeofhavingalittleschoolgirlcrushonhim,somethingofnoconsequence.Maybe
that’sallitiswithSam,too.Hecertainlydoesn’tseeitgoinganywhere.”“Haveyoustoppedto
considerthepossibilitythathe’sscared?Thisisamanwho,byhisownadmission,neverreallythoughtmuchaboutsettlingdown,muchlesshavingafamily.Now,outoftheblue,he’sadad.And,alsooutoftheblue,hediscovershehasfeelingsfor
you.That’salotforacarefreeguytotrytoabsorbinamatterofafewmonths.”“I’mnottryingtorushhim
downtheaisle,forheaven’ssake.Ijustwanttosleepwithhim.”Abbydidn’teventryto
containherlaughatthat.“Toomuchinformation,sweetie.NotthatI’measilyshocked.We’veallseenthiscoming.Andweallknow
thatyouhaveverylittlepatience.Youwantwhatyouwantwhenyouwantit.Iblameyourgrandfatherforthat.Healwayssawthatyouandyoursistergoteverythingyoueveraskedfor.I’msureifyouweretotellhimyouwanttojumpintobedwithSam,he’ddohislevelbesttomakethathappen,too.”“Mom!”Carrieprotested,
thoughshe,too,laughed.“He
probablywould,wouldn’the?”“Itmightmakehimalittle
crazy,becauseyouareoneofhisinnocentlittleangels,butyes,heprobablywould.Doyouwantthat?”“Heavens,no!”shesaid
fervently.“IfGrandpaMickinterferes,itwouldprobablysendSampacking.”“Andyoudon’twant
that?”
“No,ofcoursenot.Idon’twantmarriage,either.Notrightaway,anyway.”“Butyouareinlovewith
Sam?Andyouseemarriagetohiminyourfuture?”Carriesighed.“I’mscared
to,”sheadmitted.“Hemightneverchangehismind.”“Oh,Ithinkhewill,once
hisnerveshaveachancetosettle.”“Sowe’rebackto
patience,”Carriesaid,resigned.“AndthatopenheartNell
talksaboutsomuch.”AbbysethermuginthesinkandpulledCarrieintoanembrace.“Focusontheday-carecenterfornow.We’regoingtocelebratethatatSundaydinner.Nellhasallyourfavoritesonthemenu.Enjoyyourbigmoment.Focusonthegrandopening
that’scomingupinjustafewmoreweeks.Everythingelsewillfallintoplace.”“Promise?”Carriesaid
wistfully.O’Brienpromiseswerealwayskept.“Asmuchasit’sinmy
power,”Abbysaid,thensmiled.“Andwealwayshaveyourgrandfatherinreserveforbackup.”Carriechuckled,justasher
momhadintended.Shehad
towonder,though—ifitcamerightdowntoit,she’dresorttowhateverdeviousmeanswerenecessarytoconvinceSamthefuturewasn’tasscaryashewasimaginingittobe...aslongastheyfacedittogether.
***
SamspenttherestofthemorningafterCarrie’s
departurepacingaroundhishouseandtryingtoconvincehimselfhe’ddonetherightthing.Somehow,though,hecouldn’tshakethelookonherfaceasshe’dleft,asifhe’dturnedhisbackonsomethingimportant.Notjustsex,butonthetwoofthem.Sincethehousewasn’tbig
enoughtocontainhisfrustratedpacing,hesteppedoutsidejustintimeforthe
arrivalofthemailcarrier,whohandedhimanexpressenvelope.Glancingatthereturnaddress,hesawitwasfromRobert’sparents.Insidetherewasasealed
envelopeherecognizedatonceasbeingLaurel’sfavoritelavenderstationary.AnotefromRobert’smotherhadbeenpaper-clippedtoit.
DearSam,
Ifoundthisaddressedtoyouwhenwewerecleaning out thehouse. I’m sorry Ididn’t spot it sooner,but I wanted to get ittoyouasquicklyas Icould. IhopeyouandBobby are doingwellandthatwecanallgettogether soon. Weloved the picturesfrom the birthday
party. Thanks somuchfordoingthat.Sincerely,Delores
Sam’shandtrembledasheheldtheenvelopefromhissister.Whyhadshetuckeditawaysomewhereandnevermailedit?Hesighed.Onlyonewaytofindout.Hetoreopentheenvelope
andremovedtwosheetsoffaintlyscentedstationary.
MydearestSam,As I write this, I’mhoping you’ll neverreadit,but ifyouare,then something hashappened to me andRobert.Iknowitmustbe hard for you toimagine that I hadenough foresight toprepare for theworst,but that’s whatmaturity andhavinga
family does to acarefree spirit likemine.I suspect you’re
pretty angry withRobert and me forpicking you asBobby’sguardian,buthe and I agreed thatyou’re the absolutebest choice. I think Iknow you even betterthan you know
yourself. For yearsyou’ve been runningfrom the past—ourpast—but that’s noway to findwhat youtrulyneed.Todo thatyou need to falldeeply in love andcreate the kind offamily we never had.I’ve done that withRobert andour boy. Ithink Bobby will be
that blessing in yourlife,too.You can do this,
Sam. You’re a betterman than our dad.You’re a forever guy.IfIdidn’tbelievethatwith my whole heart,I’d have let Robert’sparents take Bobby.But our son needsexactly what you canprovide ifyoubelieve
in yourself. You’llgive him a home andstability—I’ll bet youalready have, haven’tyou?—andyou’llgivehim the taste ofadventure every littleboy needs to thrive,too.We love you, Sam.
We’re trusting youwiththemostvaluablepartofus.Iknowyou
won’t let us down.Don’t let yourselfdown,either,andgrabevery ounce ofhappiness that’s outthereforyourself.Love, Laurel andRobert
Thepages,dampenedwithSam’stears,flutteredtotheground.Hethoughtofhissisterandthefaithshehadin
him,ofCarrieandthetrustshe’dplacedinhim.AndhethoughtofBobby,whobelievedthatSamcouldmakeeverythinginhislifeokay.“Carriewasright,”he
murmured.“Iamanidiot.”Andattheveryfirst
opportunity,hewasgoingtoclaimthehappinessthatjustafewshorthoursagohehadn’tfelthedeserved.Hejustprayedhewasn’ttoolate.
***
SusiewasclingingsotightlytoMack’shand,she’dalmostcutoffthecirculation.“What’stakingsolong?”
sheaskedforwhathadtobethetenthtime.“It’snotasifwe’repicking
upproduceatafarmstand,”Macksoothed.“I’msurethere’salotofpaperworkandConnor’sprobablydoing
everythinghecantomakesurewe’reprotected.”Theyweresittingina
conferenceroomatConnor’soldlawofficesinBaltimore,waitingforthemomentwhentheywouldfinallyholdtheirbaby.“Doyousupposewe’ll
havetoseethemom?”Susieasked.“Doyouwantto?”“IdoandIdon’t.Iwantto
thankherfordoingthis,forgivingusthisamazinggift.ThenIthinkaboutalltheheartacheandIwanttosnatchthehairrightoffherhead.”Mackknewshewasn’t
entirelyjoking.Hewasprettymuchfilledwithmixedemotions,too.“Let’sjustfocusonthegratitude,”hesuggested.Justthenthedooropened
andConnorwalkedin,ababygirl—theirbabygirl—cradledinhisarms.“Susie,Mack,I’dlikeyou
tomeetyourdaughter.Hermom’sgivenheraname,butyou’refreetochangeit.I’mthinkingyoumightnotwantto.”Mackwatchedashiswife
tookahesitantstepforward,thenreachedoutandgentlybrushedafingeralongthe
baby’scheek.TearswerestreamingdownSusie’sface.Hisowneyeswerewellingup—atthisincredible,long-awaitedmomentandatthejoyshininginSusie’seyesrightalongwiththosetears.Susieheldoutherarmsand
Connorcarefullyplacedthebabyintothem.“I’mshaking,”Susiewhispered.“You’redoingfine,”
Connorassuredher.Hiseyes
lookedalittledamp,too.“Whatdidthemomname
her?”Susieasked.“Josephine,”Connorsaid.
“She’sbeencallingherJo.”Susie’sgazeliftedin
shock.“Mymom’sname?”Connornodded.“Ithinkit’sperfect,”Mack
said.“Whatdoyouthink,Suze?”Blinkingbacktears,she
lookedintohiseyes.“Ithink
thiswasmeanttobe,don’tyou?”Histhroattightenedatthe
purejoyonherface.“Ithinkit’sthemiraclewe’veallbeenprayingfor.”HecastaquicklookinConnor’sdirection.“Itis,isn’tit?”“It’sasairtightasIcan
possiblymakeit,”Connorpromised.“She’syours.”Mackmovedtohiswife’s
sideandgazeddownintothat
sweet,preciouslittlefacethathadcaptivatedhimfromtheinstanthe’dseteyesonhertinypicture.Heputanarmaroundhiswife,thentuckedhisotherhandbeneaththebaby,feelingtheweightofher,closeenoughnowtodrawinthatbabysmellthatwomenalwaysgrewsonostalgicabout.Susielookedupintohiseyes,thendownintothefaceoftheir
daughter.“Jo,I’myourmomandthis
isyourdad.We’regoingtoloveyousomuchit’llprobablymakeyoucrazy,butyouareourgiftfromGod,andwe’llneverforgetthat.”“Never,”Macksaid,his
heartsuddenlysofullhecouldn’thelpwonderinghowhe’deverthoughttheirlifewouldbecompletewithoutthistinylittleprincessinhis
wife’sarms.Now,atlonglast,theyhad
theirfamily.
***
OnSunday,SamonceagainfoundhimselfatthebigfamilydinneratMickO’Brien’s,thoughthistimeitwasMackwho’dinsistedhecome.“We’recelebratingthe
openingofCarrie’sday-carecenter.Youshouldbethere,”Mackhadsaid.“Idon’tcarewhatsortofdisagreementthetwoofyouhad.Today’sadayforshowingthatwesupporther.”“Shouldn’tthefocusbeon
youandSusieandyournewbaby?”Samhadasked.ThoughhewaseagertomakethingsrightwithCarrie,hewasn’tsurethiswasthe
occasionforit.“Thiswillbeherintroductiontothefamily,right?”Thebemusedlookofanew
dadpassedacrossMack’sface.“Believeme,everybodyinthefamilyhasbeenbythehouseatleastoncetogetapeekather.Thechristeningiscomingupinacoupleofmonths,oncewe’recertaintheadoptionisgoingtobefinalized.Iimagineshe’s
goingtogetpassedaroundtoeveryfemalepresentonSunday,butthedayisreallyaboutCarrie.Iknowyoucareabouther.Betheretosharethiswithher.”Samhadbeenjust
desperateenoughforaglimpseofCarrietoagree.She’dbeensurprisinglyelusiveeversinceshe’dwalkedoutofhishouseafewdaysearlier.Noquestionthat
she’dbeendeliberatelyavoidinghim.Whatelsehadheexpectedsincehe’dallbuttoldherthathedidn’tintendtogetinvolvedinanythingserious.Nowthathe’dcometohis
senses,inpartbecauseofhissister’sreassurancesfrombeyondthegrave,hewasreadytotakeitallback.HewantedCarrietoknowthathewascrazyinlovewithher.
Bobbyclearlyadoredher,too.Infact,thesecondthey’darrivedatMick’sandhe’dspottedCarrieintheyard,he’dgonerunningofftothrowhisarmsaroundher.She’dglancedSam’sway,then,justasquickly,lookedaway.Withhercheekspink,herhairtousledandkidsswarmingaroundher,shewaseverythingtheperfectmothershouldbe,notathing
intheworldlikethesad,brokenwomanwithwhomhe’dgrownup.Howhadheeverthought
hecouldturnawayfromthat,heaskedhimself.Evenasix-year-oldhadsenseenoughtogravitatestraighttoher.Ashissisterhadessentiallytoldhim,itwastimeforhimtostartrunningtowardsomething,ratherthanawayfromit.Peoplewholoved
deeplygothurt.Theysufferedterriblelosses.Itwasunavoidable.Butlovingdeeplywastheonlywaytotrulylive.Gatheringuphiscourage
andallthestrengththatcamefromknowingthiswastherightthingtodo—forhimandforBobby—Samwalkedslowlyacrosstheyard.HewashalfwaytoCarrie,whenshenoticedhisapproach.
Gazeslocked,sheextricatedherselffromthekidsandtookahalfstepinhisdirection,thenstoppedandwaited.Clearly,shewasleavingwhateverhappenednextuptohim.Hegotthat.He’drebuffedhertoomanytimesbefore.“Hi,”hesaidinanelywhen
hereachedher.Asmiletuggedatherlips.
“Hi.”
“I’msorry.”“For?”“Beinganidiot.”“Ihaveitongood
authority,you’renotthefirstmantoexcelatit.”“Howareyouatforgiving
itandmovingon?”“I’mnotsure,”shesaid.“I
haven’tbeentestedthatoften.”“Iloveyou,Carrie.”Shockregisteredinher
eyes.Clearlyshehadn’texpectedthewordstocomeouthere,maybeever.“Seriously?”“Don’ttellmeI’vefinally
surprisedyou.”“Yousaidsomethingabout
movingon.Thelovethingisprettymuchoutoftheblue.”Heheldhergaze.“Isit?”“Foryou,Imeant.Notfor
me.Isawthehandwritingonthewallforusweeksago.”
“Yeah,aboutthathandwriting.IttookmeawhiletotranslateitintoalanguageIcouldunderstand.”“English?”“No,thelanguageofthe
heart.I’lladmitIhadalittlehelp.”“From?”Ahorrifiedlook
crossedherface.“Pleasetellmemygrandfatherdidn’thaveanythingtodowiththis?”
“No.Ihadaletterfrommysister.”Hereyeswidened.
“Seriously?”“ApparentlyRobert’s
parentsfounditastheywerecleaningoutthehouse.ShetoldmewhyshewantedBobbytobewithme.ShehadsomuchfaiththatIcouldgetthisright,andsheencouragedmetotakeachanceonhappinesswhenIfoundit,so
that’swhatI’mdoing.I’mgoingforbrokehere.I’mwillingtochooseloveoverfear.”“Fear?”“ThatIcouldloseyou.”Shetuckedherhandinto
his.“I’mnotgoinganywhere,Sam.”Henodded,choosingto
havefaith.Heswallowedhard.“Okay,then.Ifyou’renotafraidtotakeachanceon
aguywhoneverimaginedhe’dsettledowninoneplacewithawifeandahousefulofkids,thenI’mnotafraidofthatanymore,either.”Shesearchedhisface.
“You’resure,Sam?Reallysure?Becauseoncewegoinsideandpeoplefindoutwe’retogether,therewillbehelltopayifyoudecidelatertobailonme.”“Nobailing,”heswore.
“Notonmyside.”Afull-fledgedsmilebroke
acrossherfacethen.“Notonmine,either.”“ThenIguessit’ssafeto
tellBobby,yourparentsandyourgrandfather,”hesaid,pullingherintohisarms,thenmurmuringagainstherlips,“Maybenotrightthisminute,though.”Butbythetimehe’dkissed
herthoroughlyinfrontof
whatgrewtobeacheeringthrongofO’Briens,hefiguredtherewasnoneedtomakeanysortofannouncement.Thenewsthathe’dcometohissenseswasclearlyout!Bobbydancedaround
them,hisexcitementcontagious.“We’regettingmarried,”heannouncedtoanyonewho’dlisten.“Hey,pal,thatnewsis
supposedtocomefrommeandCarrie,”Samtoldhim,thoughhecouldn’thelpbeinggratefulforthehelpinmakingthatfinalleap.AbbyandTracewere
quicktooffertheircongratulations,thenMickO’Brienheadedtheirway.Hehuggedhisgranddaughter,thengaveSamaheartyslapontheback.“Welcometothefamily,son!”
“Thankyou,sir.You’vesetthebarforthisfamilyprettyhigh.I’lldomybesttodeservetobeapartofit.”“Youjustlovemygirlhere
withyourwholeheartandyou’llhavedoneeverythingI’veeveraskedofanyone.”Micklookedaround,abeamingsmileonhisface.“Masentmeoutheretogetallyourhooligansinsideandaroundthetable.Dinner’s
ready.Waittillshehearsthisnews.Iimagineshe’llberaidingmyfancywinecellarformybestchampagne.”HecastameaningfullooktowardMack,Susieandtheirbabygirl.“O’Brienshavealottocelebratetodayandmoreblessingsthananymanhasarighttoaskfor.”“Amentothat,”Megan
said,linkingherarmthroughhis.
AsSam,CarrieandBobbyjoinedtheothersheadinginside,SamstoppedforamomenttolookintoCarrie’seyes.Heneededtobesuresheunderstoodexactlyhowhewasfeeling.“Justsoyouknow,
marriagewaspartofthatwholespeechofmineawhileago,evenifBobbykindofstolemythunderbygettingtheactualwordsoutbeforeI
could.Iloveyou,Carrie.”“Iloveyou,too,withall
myheart.”ShereachedforBobby’shand,too,andwinkedathim.“We’regettingmarried!”“Awesome!”Bobby
declared.SamcaughtCarrie’sgaze
andheldit.“Itisprettydarnawesome.”Infact,hecouldn’tthinkof
asinglethingtotopit.Then
heglancedatSusieandMackstaringdownintothefaceoftheirdaughter,theirexpressionsfilledwithawe.Except,perhaps,that,Samthought.Ababywouldcompletethings.Evenasthethoughtstruck,
hewaitedforpanictofollow.Whenitdidn’tcome,whentheonlythingstirringinsidehimwasanticipation,heknewalltheadventureshe’d
everneedwererighthere.
Epilogue
MicksatattheheadofthemassivetableinhisdiningroomforSundaydinnerandlookedaroundwithsatisfaction.Smallertableshadbeenaddedhereandthere,squeezedintocorners,forhisgrandchildren.So
manyleaveshadbeenaddedtothemaintable,itactuallystuckoutoftheroomandintothefoyer.Evenso,hecouldseeeveryonewhomatteredtohiminthislife.Meganwasrightnextto
him.Whenitcametohisgreatestblessings,shewasrightupthere.Hewasthankfuleverydaythatthey’dmadetheirpeace.Theirmarriagewasonamoresolid
foundationtodaythanithadbeenatanytimesincethey’dfirstwedsomanyyearsago.Mawasattheoppositeend
ofthetable,reunitedwithDillon,theIrishmanwho’dbeenherfirstloveandwho’dcomebackintoherlifejustafewyearsago,atimelyifunexpectedreunionthatallowedthemtoliveouttheirdaystogether.Inbetween,hisbrothers
andtheirspousesandtheirgrownchildren,allmarriednow.Hisownchildrenwerethere,too,mostofthemparentsthemselvesnow.Abby’stwinswerethefirstofhisgrandchildrentomarryandCaitlynhadevengivenhimhisfirstgreat-grandchild,littleJacksonMcIlroy.ToobadaboutthatScottishheritage,butMickcouldlivewithitaslongashisgirlwas
happy.Hehadafeelingitwouldn’tbelongbeforeCaitlyn’ssister,Carrie,addedyetanotherbabytothemix.SheandSamhadthelookoftwopeoplewhocouldn’twaittogetstartedonaddingtotheirfamily.Hewasblessed,tobesure!
Everyonealwaysthoughtthatthistownthathe’ddesignedandbuiltfromscratch,buttingheadswithhis
brothersalltheway,washisprideandjoy.Tobesure,ChesapeakeShoreswasthecrowningachievementofhiscareer.Itwasacommunitythewayacommunitywasmeanttobe,filledwithgoodpeoplewhocaredaboutoneanother.Butthecrowning
achievementofhislifewasrighthereinthisroom,astrongfamilywithasolid
foundationofvaluesandlove.They’dmadetheirshareofmistakes,himmostofall—notthathe’deveradmititaloud—butthey’dlearnedfromthosemistakes.Theywerestrongerforhavingweatheredtoughtimes.Theywerestrongerforhavingeachother.Asifshesensedhis
thoughts,Meganreachedoverandtookhishandin
hers.Heliftedtheirclaspedhandsandbrushedakissacrossherknuckles.“It’salittleoverwhelming
sometimes,isn’tit?”shesaidquietly.“Lookingaroundandseeingthisfamilygatheredtogether,thinkingofeverythingwe’vebeenthrough.”“Itis,indeed,”Micksaid.Formostmenthesight
wouldhavebeensatisfaction
enough,evidenceofalifewell-lived,buthisglancestrayedtothelittleonesatthosetablesMahadtuckedintocornersoftheroom.TheywerethefutureoftheO’Briens,anduntiltheyweregrownandsettled,hisworkherewasfarfromdone.Megansmiled.“Youknow,
Mick,therearealwaysgoingtobemoreO’Brienbabiesinthisworld,”shesaid,asif
oncemoreshe’dbeenreadinghismind.“Wecan’tstickaroundtoguidethemall.Soonerorlaterwe’lljusthavetotrustthatthelessonsyou’vepassedon,thevaluesyourmothertaughtyouandyourbrothersareintheirhands.”Micknodded,suddenly
awareofhisownmortality.Hesqueezedhiswife’shand.“Butnotjustyet,”hesaid
softly.“Notjustyet.”
*****
KeepreadingforanexcerptfromDOGWOODHILLby
SherrylWoods.
“SherrylWoodswritesemotionallysatisfyingnovelsaboutfamily,
friendshipandhome.Trulyfeel-greatreads!”
—#1NewYorkTimesbestsellingauthorDebbie
Macomber
Lookingformoreincrediblestoriesfrom#1NewYorkTimesbestsellingauthorSherrylWoods?Returnto
ChesapeakeShoresforalittleholidaymagicinthis
heartwarmingChristmastale:TheChristmasBouquet
(November2015)
CatchupwiththeO’Brien
familyinChesapeakeShores,wherestoriesoffriendship,familyandloveawait—youmayneverwanttoleave.Collectthecompleteseries
today!
TheInnatEaglePointFlowersonMainHarborLights
AChesapeakeShoresChristmas
DriftwoodCottageMoonlightCoveBeachLane
AnO’BrienFamilyChristmas
TheSummerGardenASeasideChristmas
DogwoodHillWillowBrookRoad
“Woods’samazinggraspofhumannatureandthe
emotionsthatliedeepwithinusmakethisstory
universal.”—RTBookReviewsonDriftwoodCottage
TakeatriptoSerenity,SouthCarolina,wheretheSweetMagnoliasarealwaysinseasonandheartwarmingromanceisonlyeverjusta
stone’sthrowaway:
StealingHomeASliceofHeavenFeelsLikeFamilyWelcometoSerenityHomeinCarolinaSweetTeaatSunriseHoneysuckleSummerMidnightPromisesCatchingFireflies
WhereAzaleasBloomSwanPoint
“Woodsemployshersignatureelements—theSouthernsmall-town
atmosphere,thesupportivenetworkoffriendsand
family,andtheheartwarmingromance—to
greateffect.”—Booklist
Orderyourcopiestoday!
Connectwithuson
Harlequin.comforinfoonournewreleases,accessto
exclusiveoffers,freeonlinereadsandmuchmore!
Otherwaystokeepintouch:
Harlequin.com/newslettersFacebook.com/HarlequinBooksTwitter.com/HarlequinBooks
HarlequinBlog.com
DogwoodHillbySherrylWoods
1
StandingoutsideChesapeakeShoresHighSchoolonhisfirstvisittothisquaintsmalltownontheChesapeakeBay,
Aidanconcludedhe’dneverseenamorebeautifulsightinhislife.Notthehillsidecovered
withaforestoffloweringpinkandwhitedogwoodtrees,thoughthatwasspectacularandunexpectedinthemiddleoftown.Notthenearbybay,whichwassparklinginthespringsun,thoughitmadehimyearntogofishingdespitethefactit
wassomethinghe’ddoneonlyoncebeforeinhislife.Noteventhestate-of-the-artfootballstadiumwithitspro-levelelectronicscoreboard,itslushgrassandimpressivepermanentbleachers,allofwhichshouldhaveknockedhissocksoffastheschool’sprospectivecoach.Nope,whatcaughthiseye
wastheslenderwomanwithherblondhairtousled,her
laughcarryingonthebreezeasshechasedapuppythatwastryingvaliantlytoherdaflockofunhappyCanadageese.Justthenthedog,some
sortofblack,whiteandbrownAussieshepherdmixfromthelooksofhim,spottedAidan,boundedoverandtriedtocorralhimintojoiningthegeeseinthenicetightgrouphewasapparently
envisioninginhisinstinctivepuppybrain.Withablackpatchoffuraroundoneeye,heboreastrikingresemblancetoapirate,causingAidan’ssmiletospread.“Stopit!Archie,that’s
enough,”thewomancommanded,fightinghard,butunsuccessfully,toswallowanotherlaugh.“Sit.Benice.”
Archieobedientlysat,tonguelolling,andgaveAidanahopefullook.“I’msosorry,”shesaid.
“Hegotawayfromme.”“Noproblem,”Aidan
replied.“Actuallyitisaproblem.
Thetownhasverystrictleashlaws,”sheexplainedasshesnappedArchie’sleashtohiscollar,“exceptforthedogparkontheothersideofthe
hill.It’sfencedin,sothedogsareallowedtorunfree,butArchieherespottedthegeese,instinctkickedinandthesecondsomeoneopenedthegate,hetookoffonamissiontoroundthemup.Hethinksit’shisjob.”“He’sverygoodatit.
WheredoIfitin?Notbeingagoose,thatis.”Whenshesmiled,
amusementsettingoffsparks
inherdeepblueeyes,itquitesimplytookhisbreathaway.“Oh,hethinksanything
thatmovesisfairgame,”sheconfided.“He’sverydiligent.”Aidan,who’dneverowned
apet,regardedthedogwarily.“Whathappensnow?IfImove,doeshetrytosnagmebythehandtodragmeback?”“Ithinkyou’resafeforthe
moment,thoughifyouhappentohaveadogtreatinyourpocket,you’llmakeafriendforlife.”“Sorry.Notreats.”Asifheunderstood,Archie
staredathimdolefully,theninchedcloser,finallybuttingAidan’shand.“He’lltakeagoodhead
rub,instead,”shetoldhim.“Don’tworry.Hereallyisharmless.I’veonlyhadhim
foracoupleofweeks,buthe’sbeenarealgentleman.Hisownerhadtogivehimupbecausehewastooenergeticforher,sohe’slookingforanewpersonandanewpurpose.”“Thusthegeese,”Aidan
guessed.“Exactly.”“Areyouhisnewperson?”“Oh,no,”shesaidatonce.
“Ialreadyhavetwodogsand
acat,noneofwhichIintendedtohave,butpeopleknowItakeinstraysandtrytofindnewhomesforthem.Whensomethinglikethiscomesup,theybringtheirpetstome.Cordelia’sgrandchildrenmeantwellwhentheygaveherapetforherbirthday,buttheydidn’treallythinkaboutherbeingclosetoeighty.Ithappensalot.Peoplethinktheelderly
needcompanionship,buttheyreallyhavenoideawhichanimalmightbebestsuitedforthejob.”“Andyoudo?”“I’dliketothinkso.
Cordelianowhasabeautifulcatwhoseownerdied.Fluffysitsinherlapandpurrs.They’rebothcontentwiththeirnewarrangement.”“Whataboutthethree
animalsstillwithyou?”he
asked,sensingthatshewasawomanforwhomcompassionprobablyoverruledgoodsenseonmanyoccasions.“I’mafraidIgotattached,”
sheadmittedwitharuefulexpression.“I’mElizabethMarch,bytheway.MostpeoplecallmeLiz.IownPetStyleonMainStreetafewdoorsupthestreetfromSally’sCafé.IopenedjustbeforeChristmaslastyear.”
Aidancouldn’tstopthegrinthatthreatened.“PetStyle?”herepeated.“Ihadnoideapetswerefashionconscious.”HeglancedpointedlyatArchieashespoke.Thedogwashappilysniffingabuttercup.Hisleathercollarlookedasifithadbeengivenagoodchewonmorethanoneoccasion.Theserviceable,butunremarkable,leashwas
equallyworn.“They’renot,buttheir
ownerssureare,”Lizsaid.“You’dbeamazed.JustlastweekIsoldafancyrhinestone-studdeddesignerdogcollarfor$150.I’dexpectedtobestuckwithit,butthoughtIshouldgiveacoupleofhigh-enditemsatry.Sureenough,atouristgrabbeditupanhourafterIputitondisplay.”
Aidanshookhisheadinastonishment.Onabeginningcoach’ssalary,he’dbeluckytobuydogfoodandpayvetbills.Thankfully,he’dspentfrugallyandinvestedwiselyduringhiscoupleofyearsasaprofootballplayer.WhenheglancedbackatLiz,shewasregardinghimspeculatively.“Youwouldn’t,byany
chance,belookingfora
dog?”sheinquired,turningthosebrightblueeyesonhiminawaythatwouldprobablygetmostmentoagreetodojustaboutanythingsherequested.“He’suptodateonallhisshotsandhe’shousebroken.Bestofall,Archiealreadylikesyou.”Archiewas,indeed,
happilysprawledacrosshisfeet,apparentlyhavingconcludedthathewasno
longergoingtobeallowedtorunfree,soAidanshouldn’tbeallowedtobudge,either.Hepromptlyperkedupatthementionofhisname.Forhalfaninstant,Aidanwasactuallytemptedtosayyes,ifonlytomakethiswomanhappy.Fortunately,givenhiscircumstances,commonsensekickedin.“You’reverygoodat
findingnewhomesforyour
strays,aren’tyou?”hesaid.“Soitseems,”shesaid,
beaming.“Sorry.Notthistime.I
don’thaveroominmyapartmentforadogthissize,andifthosepawsaretheindicatorsthey’resupposedtobe,Archiehereisboundtogetbigger.Imaybemovingsoon,anyway.”“ToChesapeakeShores,
notaway,”shesaid,asifit
wasafacthe’dalreadyrevealed.“You’regoingtobethenewfootballcoach.”Aidanjuststaredather.
“Areyoupsychic,too?”“Nope,butthetownloves
itsteam,andthewordonthestreetisthatanex-proplayerisgoingtobecoachingnextseason.Everyonehashighhopeswe’llstopbeingthelaughingstockoftheregion.Sinceyoulooklikeajock
andyouwerestandingouthereadmiringthestadium,Ijustputtwoandtwotogether.”Hegaveheranamused
look.“Howdoesajocklook?”Colortintedhercheeks.
“Youknow,fit,welltoned.”Helaughed.“Isee.Well,I
amAidanMitchell,”heconfirmed.“AndI’minterviewingforthejob,butI
don’thaveityet.”“Oh,you’llgetit,”shesaid
confidently.“Everyone’sveryexcited.You’llbethesecondproplayerintown.Ofcourse,MackFranklingrewuphere,andheonlyplayedprofessionallyforaseasonbeforebecomingasportscolumnist,butthetownloveshim.Hestartedalocalweeklynewspaperacoupleofyearsback.It’savery
toughbusiness,ifyouknowanythingaboutnewspapersthesedays,buthe’sbeatentheoddsbecauseit’sthebestwaytofindoutwhat’sgoingonintown.”Shepausedforbreath,thenamended,“AsidefromsittinginSally’sandlisteningtothegossip,anyway.AtleastMacktriestobringsomejournalisticcredibilityintoplay.”AftergrowingupinNew
York,Aidanwasastonishedbythisinsightintosmall-townways.OrperhapsitwasjustLizMarch,whochatteredlikeamagpie.“DoesMackknowthathiscompetitionisalocalcafé?”“Ofcoursehedoes.Sally’s
hisbestsource.Butmostlyhe’dbethefirsttofindoutwhat’sgoingon,anyway.He’smarriedtoanO’Brien,whichmakeshimpractically
royaltyinChesapeakeShores.”Aidaninstinctively
stiffenedatthecomment,thoughhehopedshehadn’tnoticed.“Whyisthat?”“Youdon’tknowthe
town’shistory?”sheasked,lookingstartled.“Isitacriteriaforliving
here?”heasked,mostlyinjest.“DotheygiveatestattheRealtor’soffice?”
“Notreally,”shesaid,apparentlytakinghimseriously.“It’sjustalocallegend,sopeopletendtoknowit.AsIunderstandit,thelandoriginallybelongedtoanO’BrienwhocameherestraightfromIreland.Hisfamilyfarmeditforyears.Acoupleofdecadesago,threeofhisdescendants—Mick,JeffandThomasO’Brien—builtChesapeakeShoresfrom
scratchonthatland.”Shepausedforbreath,then
added,“Mick’sthefamousarchitectwhodesignedthetown.Hemightnotbeanelectedofficial,buthiswordstillcarriesalotofweightaroundhere.Jeffmanagespropertiesandsellsrealestate.”Eyestwinkling,shegaveAidanapointedlook.“Soitwouldn’treallysurprisemeifhedoesspread
thestoryhimself,thoughIimaginehe’dconsidertestingpotentialresidentstobeill-mannered.”Aidanchuckled.“Touché.”“There’sanotherbrother,
too.Thomasisawell-respectedenvironmentalistwhorunsafoundationthatfightstoprotectthebay.”Aidan’sbrainseemedto
shutdownatthecasualmentionofThomasO’Brien.
MaybecomingtoChesapeakeShoreshadbeenahugemistake,afterall,ifjusthearingthatnamemadehimflinch.He’dgottenatipaboutthecoachingjobandbeendrawnhereasiffateweresteppingin,butnowallhefeltwasthefamiliarbitternessandangercrawlingupthebackofhisthroat.Thatitmightbeunwarrantedwasaconcepthestruggledwith
fromtimetotime.Hesuddenlyrealizedthat
Lizwasstudyinghimwithaworriedexpression.“Areyouokay?DidIsay
somethingthatupsetyou?”“No,notathing,I’mfine,”
Aidanassuredher.“Thanksforthebackgroundinformation.”Hedeliberatelytookaquickglanceathiswatch,thenadded,“Ineedtogetgoing.”
Heturnedandquicklywalkedoffinthedirectionofhiscar.“Aidan!”Liz’sconcerned
voicecarriedonthebreeze.“Theschoolofficeistheotherway.”Hegaveherawaveof
acknowledgmentandkeptrightongoing,thankfultherewasnosettimeforhisinterview.He’dintentionallyscheduleditthatway,
promisingtocalloncehearrivedintownandgotsettledintotheroomtheschoolhadreservedforhimatTheInnatEaglePoint.Maybeafterashowerandsomefoodandalittlemoretimetothinkaboutwhathewasdoing,he’dbereadytomakethatcall.Ormaybenot.Itwasabigdecision,
decidingwhethertostayandtakearisk,orgo.Ifhis
friendscouldseehimnow,they’dbestunnedbyhisindecisiveness.Onthefield,he’dbeena
quick-thinkingquarterback,readingadefenseandmakingsplit-secondadjustmentsthatdeterminedwhetheraplaysucceededorfailed.Hehadn’tstruggledforevenaminutewithhisdecisiontoretirewhenhe’drealizedthataninjuryhadslowedhim
down,ruininghiseffectivenessonthefield.He’dalwayswantedtocoachatthehighschoollevel.He’dgottenhisteachingcredentialsincollegeinanticipationthatthisdaywouldeventuallycome.AttheendofhisseasonlastNovemberfollowingasecondkneeinjurythathadtakenhimoutfortheyear,he’dmadethecall.Sure,ithad
comealotsoonerthanhe’danticipated,butfatewasfunnythatway.Hewouldn’tbeoneofthoseplayerswhohungonpasthisexpirationdate.Butthisdecision?Thiswas
different.Thiswasatwenty-eight-year-oldmantryingtodecidenotonlywhetherajobandtownmightbeagoodfitbutifthetimewasrighttomeethisbiologicalfather—
ThomasO’Brien—fortheveryfirsttime.
***
LizheldacupofcoffeeinherhandstowarmthemasshesatinaboothatSally’swithBreeO’BrienCollins,whoownedFlowersonMain,thestorenextdoortohers.Breewasalsoaplaywrightwhoranalocaltheater,butshe
stilllovedspendingtheoccasionaldaymakingflowerarrangements,especiallyforspecialoccasions.Todayshe’dbeensobusywiththedecorationsforababyshowerthatthey’dpostponedtheirmorningcoffeebreakuntilafternoonwhenLiz’shighschoolhelpercouldcoverforher.“I’mtellingyou,itwas
verystrange,”shetoldBree.
“Wewerejusttalking.IshouldsayIwaschatteringaway,fillinghiminonthisandthat.”SheregardedBreewitharuefulexpression.“Ireallydohavetostopdoingthat,goingonandon,Imean.”Bree’sgrinsuggestedshe
wasdoingitagain.“Okay.Sorry.I’llgettothe
point.Ipromise.I’dtriedtoconvincehimtotakeArchie,
buthewasn’tinterested.ThenIadmittedthatI’dguessedwhohewas.Wetalkedaboutthejobforacoupleofminutes,ormaybeIdidallthetalking.Anyway,hetookoff,andnottowardtheschool,asifhe’drealizedhewaslateforameetingorsomething.Heheadedintheoppositedirection.”“Well,thatisweird,”Bree
said.“Maybehedoesn’tlike
dogs.Archieisasweetheart,butnoteverybodynoticesthatwhenhe’stryingtoherdthem.”Lizchuckled.“Yes,I’m
familiarwiththereaction.Thepoorthingcan’thelphimself,though.ButtheArchieissuewasresolved.Aidanwasn’tinterested,andthatwasthatforme.Petsbelongwithpeoplewho’llloveandappreciatethem.
ActuallyIwasfillinghiminonlocalhistory,howO’Briensbuiltthetown,whenhegotthiskindofglazedlookonhisface,thentookoff.”“Soyouthinkhisreaction
hadsomethingtodowiththeO’Briens?”Breeasked,frowning.“Itfeltthatway,buthow
couldthatbeit?Everybodylovesyourfamily.”
Breemadeaface.“That’saslightexaggeration.Dad’smadehisshareofenemiesovertheyears.Heck,foralongtime,hedidn’tevengetalongallthatwellwithhisownbrothers.He,JeffandThomasclashedovereverydetailwhentheywerebuildingthetown.It’sonlyrecently,thankstomygrandmother’sdetermination,thatpeaceandfamily
harmonyhavebeenmostlyrestored.IfyouforcepeopletositaroundthesametableonSundaylongenough,soonerorlatertheyhavetostarttalkingcivilly.IdoubtNellenvisionedjusthowlongthatprocesswouldtake,though.”Liznoddeddistractedly.
ShewasstillperplexedbyAidan’sbehavior.“ThenImusthavemisreadhis
reaction,”shesaideventually.“Iguesswe’llseewhenwordspreadsaboutwhetherhe’stakenthejobatthehighschool.”“Well,whateverAidan
feelsabouttheO’Briens,it’sone-sided,”Breesaid.“Dadisdeterminedtogethimhiredasthecoach.Hepracticallyhandpickedhimfromthelistofcandidates,sothere’snobadbloodthere,atleaston
hisside.AndyouknowMickO’Brien.Whenhewantssomething,heusuallygetsit.”Breesatbackandstudied
Lizwithaspeculativeexpression.“So,whatwashelike?Aidan,Imean.”Lizblushedunderthe
friendlyscrutiny.“Isupposehewasgood-lookinginthatwell-built,jockway.”Shewishedshehadn’tnoticed
justhowtonedandfitheseemedtobe,orthewayhiseyeshadsparkedwithwit,orthedimplethatoccasionallyappearedinhischeekwhenhewasteasingher.“Inotherwords,you
wouldn’tkickhimoutofbed,”Breeconcluded.Lizfrownedatthe
lightheartedremark.“Iwouldn’tlethiminmybed,”shecorrected,thoughshe
hopedhewouldn’tmakealiarofher.Shehadafeelinghecould.Tobolsterherresolvesheremindedbothofthem,“It’swaytoosoonformetobeeventhinkinglikethat.”Truthfully,shehopedshe
neverthoughtthatwayeveragain.Herpasthadleftherbeyondskittishwhenitcametorelationships.Shewasfiercelyindependentthese
daysanddeterminedtostaythatway.Onceburned—especiallyasbadlyasshehadbeen—twiceshy.Bree’sexpression
immediatelysobered.“Liz,sweetie,it’sbeenayearsincetheaccident.Iknowyoulovedyourhusband.Ialsoknowyoumovedheretogetawayfromthememoriesandtostartover.It’stimetodothat.Meetingsomeonenewis
partoftheprocess.Youdon’thavetofeelguiltyifyoufindAidanMitchellattractive.”“It’snotaboutguilt,”Liz
saiddefensively.“Itsoundedthatwayto
me.”“It’sabouttime.Ihavea
newbusiness.Ineedtofocusonthat.Ihavenewfriends,tosaynothingofahousefulofpets.TherearebarelyenoughhoursinthedayforallIhave
todo.Arelationshipisoutofthequestionrightnow.”Breeclearlydidn’tagree.
“Archieandalltherestarenosubstituteforlettinganotherhumanintoyourlife,”shescolded.“Ihaveplentyofhumans
inmylife,”Lizretorted.“RightthissecondI’mthinkingtheremightbeonetoomany.”Shetriedtoforcealight,teasingnoteintoher
voice,evenassheprayedthebarbwouldstrikehomeandendtheconversation.Breeimmediatelybacked
off,herexpressionstricken.“I’msorry.Meddlingisafamilytrait.Ijustcareaboutyou.Wealldo.EvenDad’sstartedaskingquestionsaboutwhynoone’scomeupwithagoodmatchforyouyet.Nowthatallofhischildren,niecesandnephewsandevenone
granddaughteraremarried,heseemstohavegottenthiscrazyideathatit’shiscivicdutytoworkonmarryingoffeverysinglepersonintown.”“I’vebarelybeenintown
sixmonths,”Lizprotested.Breegrinned.“Inhis
opinion,that’splentylongenough.Trustme,youdonotwantMickdecidingtofindamanforyou.”“Heavenforbid,”Liz
repliedwithheartfeltemotion.“I’veheardthestories.Nexttimethesubjectcomesup,youtellyourfatherthathecanfindmeadaterightafterheagreestotakeinArchie.Thatoughttoshuthimdown.”Thatearnedachucklefrom
Bree.“Now,whydidn’ttherestofuscomeupwithathreatlikethat?”“Maybeyouweren’tas
eagertoevadehismatchmakingasIam,”Lizsaid,standingup.Shehatedlyingtoherfriend,toanyone,infact,butshedidn’tthinkshe’deverbereadytosharetherealstorybehindthenightshe’dlostherhusband.BettertoescapenowbeforeBreecoaxedherintorevealingsomethingshedidn’twanttoremember,muchlesstalkabout.
Shereachedintoherpurseformoneytopayforhercoffeeandraspberrycroissant,treatssheallowedherselfonlyafterstrenuousoutingswithheranimals.ChasingArchiealloverDogwoodHilltodaydefinitelyqualified.“No.It’sonmetoday,”
Breeprotested.“It’sthepriceIpayforstickingmynosewhereitdoesn’tbelong.”She
stoodupandhuggedLiz.“Wemaybewell-meaning,butdon’tyoudarehesitatetotellanyofustobuttout,okay?”Unexpectedtearsstung
Liz’seyes.“Iwon’t,buttobehonest,knowingthatyoucareenoughtobuttinmeanstheworldtome.”Itwasalmostasifshe’d
foundawholenewfamilyafterlosingherhusbandona
rain-slickedroadoneterriblenightayearago.Thepitifultruthwas,though,thatshe’dapparentlylosthimlongbeforethatandneverknownit.
***
AfterhisdisconcertingconversationwithLiz,Aidandrovearoundtowntryingtoconvincehimselfthat
ChesapeakeShoreswasn’ttheplaceforhim.Hediligentlyfocusedonthedownside.Itonlyhadatinydistrictof
shopsandrestaurants,foronething.Thereweremorebusinessesandagreaterdiversityoffancyandtake-outfoodoptionswithintwoblocksofhisapartmentinManhattan’sUpperWestSidethantherewereinthisentire
town,maybeeventhewholeregionwithoutgoingallthewaytoAnnapolisorBaltimore.Hepickedupacopyofthe
localweeklyLizhadmentionedandcomparedittothedailyNewYorknewspapers,thenshookhishead.Whenameetingofthetown’sbeautificationcommitteewasfront-pagenews,hewasdefinitelyinthe
wrongplace.Then,ofcourse,therewas
theinsightLizhadgivenhimintoatownwhereseeminglyeveryonekneweveryoneelse’sbusiness.InNewYork,thoughhehadplentyoffriendsinthecity,hewasbarelyacquaintedwithmostofhisneighbors.Thathadalwayssuitedhimjustfine.Therewereenoughrealcelebritiesaroundtownthata
professionalathletecouldeasilyavoidthelimelightifthatwashischoice.Inhiscase,ithadbeen.Howcouldthispossiblybe
thebestmatchforhim?Evenifthetowndidn’tcomewithawholeslewofemotionalbaggageattached,small-townlivingprobablywasn’trightforhim.He’dgostir-crazyinamonth,quiteprobablysooner.
Sighingheavily,hecametowhathadtobethebestdecision.He’dsetupaninterviewfortomorrow,becausehe’dmadeacommitmentandcommitmentsmeantsomethingtohim.He’deventrytolistenwithanopenheart,buthismindwasalreadymadeup.He’ddeclinethejob,wishthemwell,thentakeoffrightafter
theinterview.Therewereboundtobe
othercoachingjobs,jobsthatwouldn’tputhimanywherenearamanhe’dnowconvincedhimselfhedidn’treallyneedtoknoworevenmeet.ThomasO’Brienwasanameonapieceofpaper,animportantpieceofpapertobesure,butmeetinghimwouldn’tchangethefactthathe’dbeennothingtoAidan
hisentirelife.Atleastheknewwheretofindhimifsomegenetichealthissuecroppedupyearsfromnow.AnimageofLizcreptinto
hisheadandhefeltamoment’sregret.Notonlywasshebeautiful,shehadagoodheart.He’dfeltaninstantaneousconnectiontoher,somethingthatrarelyhappenedwiththewomenwhotendedtoflockaround
professionalathletes.Lizwasreal.Still,hecouldn’tallowa
momentaryattractiontoawomantoswayhimintomakingadecisionthatwassoobviouslyallwrong.He’dhaveanicedinner,getagoodnight’ssleep,meetwiththehighschoolprincipalandthengoonhisway.Satisfiedwithhisplan,he
checkedthedirectionsand
headedtowardTheInnatEaglePoint.Ashedrovealongthewindingroad,hecouldn’thelpnoticingthenearbybay,andoncemoreLiz’smentionofThomasO’Brien’spassionforthatbodyofwaterslippedpasthisdefenses.Hepiecedherwordstogetherwithwhatlittlehismotherhadtoldhimovertheyearsandwonderedwhatitmustbeliketobeso
idealisticthatacausematteredmorethanpeople,morethanason.Ifheleft,he’dneverknowtheanswertothat.“Stopit!”hemuttered,as
emphaticwithhimselfasLizhadbeenwithArchieearlier.Thedecisionwasmade.Somehow,though,itdidn’t
seemquiteasvalidaswhenhe’dfirstreachedit.
***
WhenLizgothomethatnight,Archie,SashaandDominiquemetheratthedoorofherlittlebungalowacrossthestreetfromDogwoodHill.Thetwoterriermixesthatshe’drescuedsoonaftercomingtoChesapeakeShoresmightbesmallcomparedtoArchie,buttherewaslittlequestion
aboutwhothealphadogswereinherhome.Girlsruled!Afterafewfailedattemptstoherdthem,Archiehadacquiescedtotheirdominance.Nowhesatquietlybyand
waitedforhisturntogetLiz’sattention.Thenallthreedogstrailedherintothekitchen,whereherimperialmajesty,aone-earedSiameseknownasAnastasia,regarded
themallwithasuperiorlookasshesatbesideherkittydishawaitingdinner.WhenLizonceagaintriedaless-expensivebrandofcatfood,Anastasiaregardedherwithanaccusinglookandturneduphernose.“Idon’tevenknowwhyI
try,”Lizgrumbled.“Otherthanthefactthatthisotherstuffisgoingtobankruptme.”Evenso,shedumped
therejectedfoodinthegarbageandreplaceditwiththecat’spreferredbrand.Asshelookedaroundher
small,butnicelyupdatedkitchen,themismatchedgroupofstraysbroughtasmiletoLiz’slips.“Bree’swrong,”shetold
thememphaticallyasshedoledoutmorehugsandscratchesbehindtheears,thendishedupdinnerforthe
dogs.“YouguysareallthecompanionshipIneed.”Butevenasshesaidthe
words,animageofAidanMitchellcreptintomakeherbloodpumpjustalittlefaster.Andthatwasexactlywhyshehadtostayfar,farawayfromhim.
Copyright©2015bySherrylWoods
ISBN-13:9781460390191
WillowBrookRoad
Copyright©2015bySherrylWoods
Allrightsreserved.Bypaymentoftherequiredfees,youhavebeengrantedthenon-exclusive,non-transferablerighttoaccessandreadthetextofthise-
bookon-screen.Nopartofthistextmaybereproduced,transmitted,down-loaded,decompiled,reverseengineered,orstoredinorintroducedintoanyinformationstorageandretrievalsystem,inanyformorbyanymeans,whetherelectronicormechanical,nowknownorhereinafterinvented,withouttheexpresswrittenpermissionof
publisher,HarlequinEnterprisesLimited,225DuncanMillRoad,DonMills,Ontario,CanadaM3B3K9.
Thisisaworkoffiction.Names,characters,placesandincidentsareeithertheproductoftheauthor’simaginationorareusedfictitiously,andanyresemblancetoactual
persons,livingordead,businessestablishments,eventsorlocalesisentirelycoincidental.ThiseditionpublishedbyarrangementwithHarlequinBooksS.A.
®and™aretrademarksofthepublisher.Trademarksindicatedwith®areregisteredareregisteredintheUnitedStatesPatentandTrademarkOffice,the