why negotiation skills are critical · 2020. 6. 23. · recognized authority on leadership, regina...

Presented by:

Regina Barr, MBA, MA

Influence Strategies

© 2002 -2020. Red Ladder, Inc. All rights reserved. For more information: www.redladder.com / [email protected] / 651-453-1007.

WELCOME On behalf of the Minnesota Women Lawyers (MWL), welcome to today’s seminar, Influence Strategies: What Every Leader Needs to Know!™ Today’s leader is often in a position of influence, rather than power, whether they realize it or not. The ability to affect others’ actions, decisions, opinions or thinking will be their most critical key to leadership success no matter what their role in the organization. Topics will include: • Barriers that may impede the ability to influence others – including your boss! • Dynamics of “power differentials” and how to tip them in your favor! • How to partner with high-powered people without giving your own power away! • Identifying your own persuasive abilities and conflict style so you can use them to your advantage! Geared towards both experienced and emerging leaders, this seminar will allow participants to develop self-awareness and influence skills for leading, so others will follow. ABOUT OUR PRESENTER

Regina Barr is a former financial marketing executive, Founder and

CEO of Red Ladder, Inc. and Founder of the Women at the Top® (WATT™) Network. She brings over two decades of corporate experience to her consulting, coaching and speaking practice. Regina helps women and men scale the barriers – both internal and external – that prevent them from achieving the career success they deserve. A nationally recognized authority on leadership, Regina is frequently quoted in local and

national publications. In addition, Regina’s Women at the Top® column was featured regularly in TFW magazine, and her blog, Women at the Top®, was featured as one of 25 career and business women blogs to read by BlogHer.

A two-time honoree as a Top Woman in Finance, Regina was also named a 2010 Finance & Commerce Top Women in Finance Circle of Excellence Award recipient and the 2009 Financial Women International Partner in Success Award. She is also a former Minneapolis/ St. Paul Business Journal 40 Under Forty honoree. An avid believer in giving back, Regina currently serves on the board of Minnesota Excellence in Public Service. Regina is also a member of the National Association of Female Executives, Society of Human Resource Management, National Association of Women Business Owners, National Speakers Association, Women’s Speakers Association, and a lifetime member of Financial Women International.

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I) Lateral Leadership

Let’s begin by examining the characteristics of influential people. EXERCISE: Leadership Observation – Success Factors Think of a time when you or someone else successfully led a group or team – when you (or they) were NOT the boss – that led to a successful outcome. Key factors for success:

What is a lateral leader?

Definition: You are a lateral leader when you lead in situations where you don’t have command authority. This is sometimes referred to as leading from the side.

Notes: ________________________________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________

Behaviors of Lateral Leaders:

1. Who are you?

2. What do you know?

3. How do you interact with people?




Influence Strategies of Lateral Leaders:

1. Establish goals

2. Think systematically

3. Learn from experience – as you go 4. Engage others

5. Provide feedback

II) Personal Influence versus Persuasion Personal Influence is _________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ Persuasion is ________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________

“The key to successful leadership is influence, not authority.” – Kenneth H. Blanchard, author and management guru




EXERCISE: Large Group Activity – Child/ Adult Influence Discuss ways that children influence adults.

What tactics do they use?

What words do they use? Flip Chart the child versions. Now consider if there are any ‘adult’ equivalents – words/ phrases you hear or tactics used in organizations to influence/ persuade people. Identify a spokesperson to report out.

EXERCISE: Group Discussion What are your attitudes on persuasion?

Indicate True or False for each of the following.

1. All you need to know about an audience is whether they are for or against you?

2. In order to communicate successfully all you need is a clear message. A clear, accurate explanation should

convince an audience.

3. A friendly audience does not need persuasion.

4. The only way to be successful at persuasion is to take an audience from total disagreement to total agreement.

5. It’s usually better not to persuade people; it’s usually best to inform them.

6. The best way to persuade an audience is to be totally logical, using statistics and documented facts.

7. If you’ve explained your position to your audience, clearly, logically and accurately, they will be persuaded.

8. If something strikes me as persuasive, it probably will be persuasive for the next person too.

9. If all people had access to the same facts, persuasion wouldn’t be needed.

NOTES: _____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________




III) Barriers to Influencing Others There are four key barriers: 1. Power differentials 2. Differences in perspective 3. Dangerous handicaps 4. Inability to diagnose value LOW POWER HIGH POWER

Overvalue high power; undervalue self

Overvalue contributions; undervalue others

Perspective: task

Perspective: strategy

Silence

Blindness

To close the gap _____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________

IV) How to Become More Influential EXERCISE: Large Group – How can you become more influential?

Do we create our own self-fulfilling prophecy? NOTES: _____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________




My advice: 1. Don’t _________________________________________________________________. 2. Correct _______________________________________________________________. 3. Find __________________________________________________________________. EXERCISE: Individual Self-Assessment

How effective are you when it comes to persuading others? For each of the following statements, select the answer that best describes your approach to persuasion: Usually Sometimes Seldom 1) I have a clear objective in mind before I ask someone for something.

2) I tailor my arguments to the values, goals, styles of the person I am trying to influence.

3) When I want something from someone I make it clear to that person how doing it will be in their self-interest.

4) If I were a manager, I’d expect my subordinates to obey my requests because I have the authority in my position.

5) If I want something from someone, I assume that person is intelligent and will respond to logic.

6) I am a good listener.

7) When I want something from someone, I use emotional appeals as well as logical.

8) I use a positive, tactful tone when trying to persuade someone.

9) I am respectful, direct and sincere when trying to persuade someone.

Scoring Key Questions 1, 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9: 3 points for Usually, 2 points for Sometimes, 1 point for Seldom Question 4: 3 points for Seldom, 2 points for Sometimes, 1 point for Usually. Sum your total points: 25 or Higher You make effective use of your persuasive resources. 22 – 24 You can be more persuasive in your interpersonal relationships. Below 22 Indicates that you have room for significant improvement in your oral persuasion skills.

My Score: ________




Tips for Effective Influencing

Effective Techniques:

Ask for clarification on what the other person wants.

Understand what the real goal is.

Take a step back.

Agree to “not total control.”

Remain calm.

Put self in other’s shoes.

Show empathy.

Relate on a personal level.

Hold the vision.

Remain patient.

Allow self to “take time.”

Develop relationship – know, like, trust factor.

Exhibit confidence.

Be specific about your priorities. Say “I have a plan to reduce costs” rather that “I have a great idea.”

Use visuals when appropriate.

Some homework. Understand the other party’s world & what they value.

Know what your currencies are – reciprocity & exchange.

Listen to feedback.

Cite successful precedents.

Make an appointment in advance when presenting a proposal.

Align the proposal with organizational thrusts (e.g., quality, re-engineering, etc.).

Cite benefits or “What’s in it for THEM?” (WIFM).

Anticipate objections or questions and have answers ready.

Suggest a trial period if rejection is likely.

Make a plan in writing.

Mention, if it is true, that the idea has already gained informal acceptance.

Acknowledge possible pitfalls.

Pause periodically and ask if the other person has questions.

Provide a time line.

Have benchmarking data available, if possible.

Cite authority who endorses the idea.

Discuss expected outcomes.

Relate the proposal, directly or indirectly, to what the other party values.

Be realistic.

Have alternative suggestions ready.

Thank the listener for his or her time.

Conclude by mentioning next steps.




Ineffective Techniques:

Assume someone is not influenceable.

Misuse exchange i.e. assume/ expect something without providing something in return.

Interrupt while the other person is talking.

Mention cost or other negative details prior to making the “pitch”.

Set up for a “yes-or-no” response. Offer options as appropriate.

Apologize.

Push for an immediate answer.

Limit the time allotted by asking, “Do you have a few minutes?”

Be offended by rejection. Ask, “What can I do to make the proposal more viable?”

Meet at a time when the other person is not likely to be receptive.

Become side tracked.

Be afraid to state your faith in the idea.

Validate the need for something by blaming others for the problem.

Dance around the topic.

Show doubt about the worth of the idea.

Neglect to ask for feedback.

Overwhelm the listener by describing how extensively he or she would be involved.

Permit the scope of the proposal to go far beyond the comfort level of the listener.

Forget to have paper and pen ready to take notes.

Abandon the project entirely if it is not favorably received. Ask which pieces could be salvaged.

Avoid eye contact.

Mumble.

Become defensive.

Overlook safety, legal, or issues related to the plan.

Be thrown by tough questions.

Forget to use the pronoun “we” as often as you use “I”.

Indirectness (be careful about using email and voicemail versus speaking in person).

Lack of clarification (e.g. my role/ agenda).

Take it personally.

Communication breakdown.

Lack of confidence/ empowerment.

Conflict avoidance – not addressing passive / aggressive behavior.




V.) The Cohen-Bradford Influence Model Sometimes it helps to have a track to run on. Allan R. Cohen and David L. Bradford provide the following influence model in their book, Influencing Up. 1. Determine who has to be influenced. 2. Assume each a potential partner. 3. Determine their power and gaps. 4. Diagnose world of powerful, possible currencies. 5. Figure out how to get access. 6. Clarify what you need, priorities. 7. Relationship, preferred approach. 8. Negotiate win-win exchange. NOTES: _____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________




VI.) Understanding Conflict and Its Impact on Your Ability to Influence Others Why do they occur? What are perceptions? Why is it important? ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ EXERCISE: Self-Assessment – My Personal Conflict Style

Read each style and put an “X” in the appropriate box. There are no right or wrong answers.

Conflict Style Use Most Often

Rarely Use

Dislike Using

When to Use

Competing I actively try to get my own way.

Avoiding I try to avoid conflict.

Accommodating I usually give in to others.

Collaborating I like to take the time to develop a mutually agreeable resolution.

Compromising I typically give up a little in return for getting some of what I want.




VI) Putting It All Together EXERCISE: Practical Application [ON YOUR OWN] Working alone (or in pairs if time allows) you will have the opportunity to develop a strategy to manage a personal leadership challenge. 1. Identify a situation where you are leading a project or team where you are NOT in charge. 2. Indicate a challenge you are facing in this situation. 3. Given what you have learned today, what are some strategies that you can use to more

effectively manage the situation? 4. Identify one strategy that you will commit to putting into action, 5. Make a contract with yourself (or a partner) to check in one week from today. (Or email me

at [email protected] and let me know how it went.)

NOTES: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________





Resources:

Business Finesse, Dealing With Sticky Situations in the Workplace for Managers, Linda Talley

Getting it Done, How to Lead When You Are Not in Charge, Roger Fisher and Alan Sharp

Influencing Others: A Handbook of Persuasive Strategies, William L. Nothstine, Ph.D.

Influencing Up, Allan R. Cohen and David L. Bradford

The Best on Leadership, Great Ideas for Improving Your Life and Your Business from some of America’s Top Speakers, Trainers, Consultants, and Authors, compiled by Larry Winget

The One Minute Manager Build High Performing Teams, Kenneth Blanchard, Ph.D.; Donald Carew, Ed.D.; Eunice Parisi-Carew, Ed.D.

The Situational Leader, Dr. Paul Hersey

Winning ‘Em Over: A New Model for Management in the Age of Persuasion, Jay A. Conger

Work With Me! Resolving Everyday Conflict in Your Organization, Gini Graham Scott

Thank you for participating in today’s program!

Upcoming Teleseminars/ Podcasts with Regina Barr

We pause our teleseminars and podcasts in July and August but we’ll be back again in September. Please check our schedule at ReginaBarr.com.

Visit www.reginabarr.com for other programs that may be of interest. Contact me at [email protected] or 651-453-1007.


http://www.reginabarr.com/


why negotiation skills are critical · 2020. 6. 23. · recognized authority on leadership, regina...

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