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Page 1: What Damn Near...By the way, if you are one of those hypersensitive, smiley-face types who gets offended by blunt, straight talk that steps on your fragile little toes, you are in
Page 2: What Damn Near...By the way, if you are one of those hypersensitive, smiley-face types who gets offended by blunt, straight talk that steps on your fragile little toes, you are in
Page 3: What Damn Near...By the way, if you are one of those hypersensitive, smiley-face types who gets offended by blunt, straight talk that steps on your fragile little toes, you are in

What’s Wrong With

Damn NearEverything!

Page 4: What Damn Near...By the way, if you are one of those hypersensitive, smiley-face types who gets offended by blunt, straight talk that steps on your fragile little toes, you are in
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What’s Wrong With

Damn NearEverything!

How the Collapse ofCore Values is Destroying Us

and How to Fix It

LARRY WINGET

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Cover Design: Michael J. FreelandCover Image: Courtesy of Randall Bohl

Copyright 2017 by Larry Winget. All rights reserved.

Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.Published simultaneously in Canada.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, ortransmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying,recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 ofthe 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permissionof the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy feeto the Copyright Clearance Center, 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923,(978) 750-8400, fax (978) 646-8600, or on the web at www.copyright.com. Requeststo the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the PermissionsDepartment, John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 111 River Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030, (201)748-6011, fax (201) 748-6008, or online at www.wiley.com/go/permissions.

Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author haveused their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations orwarranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this bookand specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for aparticular purpose. No warranty may be created or extended by salesrepresentatives or written sales materials. The advice and strategies containedherein may not be suitable for your situation. You should consult with aprofessional where appropriate. Neither the publisher nor the author shall be liablefor damages arising herefrom.

For general information about our other products and services, please contact ourCustomer Care Department within the United States at (800) 762-2974, outsidethe United States at (317) 572-3993 or fax (317) 572-4002.

Wiley publishes in a variety of print and electronic formats and by print-on-demand. Some material included with standard print versions of this book may notbe included in e-books or in print-on-demand. If this book refers to media such asa CD or DVD that is not included in the version you purchased, you maydownload this material at http://booksupport.wiley.com. For more informationabout Wiley products, visit www.wiley.com.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data:

Names: Winget, Larry, author.Title: What’s wrong with damn near everything! : how the collapse of core

values is destroying us and how to fix it / Larry Winget.Description: Hoboken : Wiley, 2017. |Identifiers: LCCN 2017010800 (print) | LCCN 2017033664 (ebook) |

ISBN 9781119417040 (ePDF) | ISBN 9781119417071 (epub) |ISBN 9781119417026 (hardback)

Subjects: LCSH: Social values. | BISAC: BUSINESS & ECONOMICS /Motivational. | BUSINESS & ECONOMICS / Careers / General.

Classification: LCC HM681 (ebook) | LCC HM681 .W56 2017 (print) |DDC 303.3/72–dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017010800

Printed in the United States of America

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CONTENTS

This Is Another Larry Winget Book ix

Preface xi

Chapter One. The Collapse of Core Values 1

What Are Core Values? 1Finding Your Core Values 4Why Have People Stopped Being Bothered? 5Want to KnowWhy This Stuff Bothers You? It’s Simple 8Get Ready for Life to Be Much Easier for You! 9A Test for Knowing Whether Something Is a Core Value 9You Can Always Spot Someone’s Core Values 10

Chapter Two.What’s Wrong with People 13

From Today’s News 14People Cater to the Lowest Common Denominator 17Let’s Keep Digging into This 22People Have Lowered Their Standards 23People Are Self-Absorbed 28People Either Can’t, Don’t, or Won’t Manage Their Money 29Why Most People Believe They Don’t Have Money 31Become Committed to Your Commitments 37People Are Either Too Gullible or Too Skeptical 40People Use Bad Grammar and Can’t Spell 46

v

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People Let Their Emotions Rule Their Lives 49People Follow Their Dreams Instead of Going to Work 52Starting Your Own Business Is Not a Dream, It’s a

Nightmare 52Why Do Most Businesses Fail? Lack of Preparation 53People Are Entitled 57Entitlement Is the Enemy of Self-Reliance 60The Government Is Feeding Entitlement Mentality 62People Are Full of Excuses and Blame 67People Are Dishonest and Lack Integrity 69We Have BecomeWay Too Tolerant of Dishonesty 72People Are Mean 76Business Has Become Mean 77People Are Lazy 80People Are Disrespectful and Uncivil 84Respect and Racism, Sexism, Ageism, Wealthism, and

Homophobia 87Respect Is Not Just about Respecting People 90People Are Offended By Damn Near Everything! 93Luckily Some People Are Speaking Up Against This

Stupidity 104People Allow Technology to Rule Their Lives 106

Chapter Three.What’s Wrong with Business 109

Why Do Businesses Exist? 109The Biggest Challenge Facing Business 112Employees Must Constantly Add Value 116Fiduciary Responsibility 118

Chapter Four.What’s Wrong with Education 121

Parental Involvement 125Failure Is an Option 126Beyond School Systems 129

vi Contents

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Chapter Five.What’s Wrong with OurGovernment 131

Welcome to Helicopter America 131Dear Government: Mind Your Own Business! 133We Have Too Many Laws 134Politics and Politicians 140

Chapter Six. The Big Question: Are We Able toTurn All This Around? 147

In Your Business 148In Your Family 148In Your Own Life 149Are YouWilling to Live by These Core Values? 149You Can’t Change the World 150

About the Author 153

Contents vii

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THIS IS ANOTHER LARRYWINGET BOOK

If you are a fan of my work or have read any of my six best-selling books, listened to or watched my speeches or onlinevideos, or follow me on social media, then much of what Isay in this book is not going tobenew toyou.When it comesto some of this stuff, I am a broken record. That’s one of thereasons I am called The Pitbull of Personal Development®;I grab on and don’t let go—just like a pitbull.

That’s because what I talk about and write aboutcomes from my core values, my experience, and myresearch. These things don’t change much from weekto week or even year to year. They don’t even changetoo much over a lifetime—some, but not much—and thatis why all of it shows up in all that I do and say and write.So, if you are a fan, you are going to see some familiarideas. But you are going to see a lot of new stuff here, too.Grittier stuff. More “I can’t believe he said that” stuff. Atleast I hope so. I didn’t hold back on any of it.

On the other hand, if you are completely new to mywork, you are going to find out pretty quickly that I havevery strong opinions, I don’t mince words, and I say exactlywhat I believe without apology. And you will disagree withme a lot. To that I say, “good.” If you disagree, then you

ix

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are engaged. There is nothing better than becomingengaged by new and different ideas. Embrace it. Enjoyit. Even when you hate what I’ve said and end up hatingmebecause I’ve said it, that’s okay because you will have moreclarity about what you believe by reading what I believe.

By the way, if you are one of those hypersensitive,smiley-face types who gets offended by blunt, straight talkthat steps on your fragile little toes, you are in for a reallyrough ride.

Okay . . . giddy-up!

x This Is Another Larry Winget Book

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PREFACE

The first time I announced the title of this book to a groupof people, there were a few who said, “Why do you have tobe so negative?Why can’t you write a book called, “What’sright with darn near everything”? I laughed. That wouldn’tbe my style at all. Most importantly, it’s not what’s rightthat is our problem; it’s what’s wrong that we aren’t doing adamn thing about that is our problem. In this book, I’mnotgoing to spend much time on what’s right, instead I’mgoing to spendmy time talking aboutwhat’swrong,why it’swrong, and what we can do about it.

Face it: things are a mess. I bet you will find it hard toargue with that statement. Our government is a mess: it’stoo big, it costs too much, and for the most part, it’sineffective. You can top that off with the fact that peoplehave completely lost confidence in it and the politicianswho run it. Recent polling says that 68 percent of peoplebelieve we are headed in the wrong direction.

It’s not just government; businesses are a mess, too.Many have forgotten that businesses exist to fill a need,solve a problem, serve their customers well, and be profit-able while doing it. A strong work ethic in employees hasbecome a thing of the past. Too many leaders confuseleadership with popularity.

xi

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Families are no exception, either. Too many parentsare indulgent, overprotective, and don’t communicate orteach morals, ethics, or values. They are raising narcissisticbrats who have no respect for others or for themselves. Andwhile the economy is a mess in our country, it’s simply areflection of the disastrous way we handle our own moneyas individuals and in our families. People spendmoney theydon’t have buying things they don’t need to impress peoplethey don’t like.

Individuals blame instead of taking responsibility.They rationalize their behavior. They are personallyoffended by almost everything even when it has nothingto do with them. They demand things, believing they areentitled to them instead of earning them. We even have ahuge segment of society that has moved back in with theirparents instead of sucking it up and figuring out how tomake it on their own. They put more thought and moremoney into their grande half-cafMochachinoFrappuccinoCrapacino than they do their savings accounts. Theydistract themselves with social media instead of working.I could go on and on and on, and every one of you readingthis could add 50more statements that would be true aboutwhat a mess people have become.

Education might be the area where it is the worst.College campuses are now full of safe zones where grownmenandwomencan run andhide toprotect themselves fromthe hurtful words of others. And yes, 18 years old is grown.We have 18-year-old men and women dying while defend-ing our country so I consider 18-year-olds grown. Collegeshave become bastions of uber-liberal ideas that chargeexorbitant amounts of money to nurture oversensitivityinstead of challenging thinking and encouraging growth.

xii Preface

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Some of us wake up every day and read or watch thenews andbarely recognize theworldwe live in.And someofus never read anything and only watch Keeping Up with theKardashians or The Bachelor or other drivel and are totallyclueless about the world we live in.

Is all of what I’ve said here a series of broad, sweepinggeneralizations? Of course! But that doesn’t make the state-ments any less true. They don’t apply to everyone but theyapply to more than enough. I recognize there are exceptionsto each of these points. Not all leaders, families, businesses,schools, or government officials are amess. But those are theexception and not the rule. I hope you are one of theexceptions to every one of the statements I’ve made. How-ever, whether you are the exception to these statements orwhether you are the epitome of one of these statements, youare going to have to admit that I’m right: things are a mess!

To be very, very clear: I am not saying that nothing isgoing right. I amnot ignoringor discounting all of the goodin the world. I see it. I acknowledge it. I applaud it. But thatis notwhat this book is about.This book is not aboutwhat isgoing right. This book is about what is going wrong andwhat we must do to fix it. I am a firm believer that it isimpossible to fix a problem unless you recognize andidentify your issue as a problem, then go to work to fix it.

And we are already making some efforts to fix thesethings. But I believe that for the most part, we are goingabout fixing things backward. We are working at fixingthings from the outside in. That rarely works and it istypically a temporary fix at best. You almost always createlong-term change when you fix things from the inside out.But that requires more time and energy and sweat thanmost people are willing to invest.

Preface xiii

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We are building walls around our country to keep thebad guys out. And while I think that is a fine idea, we havebad guys we have created right here that are doing us just asmuch harm simply because parents are teachers and societydidn’t take the time to do the work to teach people thatvaluing life and respecting others and not committingcrimes is a better way to live.

We are also building walls around our personal beliefs,ideals, biases, and prejudices. We create safe zones toprotect us from the harmful words of others, instead ofteaching people to be strong enough to withstand harmfulwords and kind enough not to say harmful words. Tomakematters worse, we have redefined a harmful word to meananything you don’t agree with. And while I agree that ourindividual rights should be protected, it seems that we onlywant protection for our rights, not the rights of anyonewhodisagrees with us.

Wedon’t allowkids to play tag, hide-and-seek, or othergames—or in some cases even have outside recess becausetheymight get hurt.Orworse, their feelingsmight get hurt.We have even gone so far in some cities as to pay criminalsnot to commit crimes. Again, this is just an external solutionto an internal problem. How about letting kids know thatyou don’t always get picked and when you play, sometimesyou get hurt. How about teaching people not to be crim-inals instead of rewarding them for being a criminal.

Our outer world is collapsing and needs to be fixed, nodoubt about it. But as the old saying goes, “As within, sowithout.”Our outer world is only a reflection of our innerworld. Our outer world is a mess because we are a mess.

I do believe we are facing the collapse of society, but itwon’t be because of the government, the liberals, the

xiv Preface

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conservatives, ISIS, foreign enemies, the economy, obesity,cigarettes, drugs, or any other external factor. Our societywill collapse if we continue to let our core values collapse.We have to fix the issues I am going to discuss in this book.However, here is the problem:

People typically only take action to fix their problemwhen it’s damn near too late.

My goal is that people read this book, realize how badthings are, and decide to take action to fix things before it’stoo late.

Preface xv

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