The Best Commit Messages of 2016

University of Chicago – CMSC 23300 Networks and Distributed Systems

Before we begin, let's take a look back at the...

Top Ten Commit Messages of All Time

10. IT WAS THE LOOOOOOOOOCKS

9. git couldn't merge a blank line with a deletion of the blank line. motherf■■ker what are you even good for

8. it compiles! doesn't reply to anything, though

7. i love the smell of segfaults in the morning

6. Made host a global (eat your heart out borja)

5. well, nothing works, all tests fail, and i have no idea how to implement this RFC, but it's not immidiately segfaulting, so, i've got that going for me

4. how the f■■k did I pass two more tests? I only fixed one of them. this is gonna bite me in the ass later isn't it? f■■k me

3. oh my god, it's spelled LUSERS, not LUSER

2. last push of the night

jk can't stop

1. worked an additional day, finished everything but send function is clearly broken so test all fail. this is hell on earth. I would pray to God, but I don't know how to correctly send messages.

And give an honorable mention to...

The Best Branch Names of 2016

inferior_branch

mutex_swag_branch

cool_kids_mutex_branch

■■■■■■■-the-mode-struggle-continues

The Best Commit Messages of 2016

$ grep “^[^a-z]\+$” commits.txtTECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES

PROGRESS IS HAPPENING

THIS IS BRKOEN

UNBROKED MASTER SORRY ■■■■ AND BORJA

LOL I DELETED HANDLERS WHOOPS

╭∩╮ ╭∩╮ （︶︿︶） PUSHING TO MASTER BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME TO. MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH

$ grep “^[^a-z]\+$” commits.txt100 PERCENT IM OUTI DID ITNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE COMPILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSALL TESTS PASSING ~~ ALL SYSTEMS GO GO GO GO GO GOP2A SUBMISSION BUT FO REAL THIS TIME

$ grep \! commits.txtfirst segfault down!yay! everything passed and now we have a whole day to make our code niceoh noooooooooooooooooooo more files to debug!!!!one test passing!no Leaks!IT'S ALIVE! or somethign allong these linesFixed bug with malformation of the nickname in use error, more points comming our way!

$ grep "^...$" commits.txt | sort -u

>:(???...abcadfall

asdChadfsdsafixidk

ughUGHwhowipWIPwtfyay

lillolloLomgplsssd

$ grep "^....$" commits.txt | sort -u

4/1595.599&? add ads asdasdfasdFasfdawayback

blahblehbluh DfadonedumbehhhFIREhadnhelphere

typoTypowheewhoowiipwork

HerehmmmlistloplnmewoopsquitsljfsljkslolTODO

$ grep -i bug commits.txt | wc --lines258

$ grep -i bug commits.txtdebug 0debug 1debug 2

...

debug 20

$ grep -i bug commits.txtfixed stupid bug about whogodknowswhat

adding support for PONG (with bug)

beginning debug proccess. this should be fun.

back into bugfixing game

Fixed bug at line 343Re-fixed bug at line 343 in tcp.c

Bug-f■■king-fixingRevert "bug-f■■king-fixing"

$ grep -i segfault commits.txtlmao segfaulting alreadyugh that made it segfaultundid changes please stop segfaultingI can send messages, but it segfaults when it receives a message. Damn.Reordered something; hopefully does not segfault nowhopefully the segfaults aren't my fault

$ grep -i what commits.txtwhat?whati don't know what i'm doing with threadsno idea what I'm doingNo idea what I did. Everything but the last test works now.I'm not actually sure what I changed.help i don't know what's going on :(idk whats up with strcatnot sure what changes have been made...?

$ grep -i god commits.txtgod bless cannonmay the gods be mercifulgod bless america.thank god I don't have to withdrawOh my god client sends server receives is completely passing I am so happy yessss

$ grep -i borja commits.txtBORJA! Why does the whois test assume space at the end?. Use regex or strip?fixing merge conflict. Borja why no git push -f?You're tearing me apart, Borja!ok borja i'll be a style nazi 4 u

$ grep -i csil commits.txtpushing to work on CSIlx 32

fixed errors -- compiling on CSILx 26

obligatory message because pushing constantly to use CSIL machinesx 25

$ grep -i hate commits.txtWe pass some modes tests and I hate uthashi hate vimI hate VMs sooo much :(I hate everything except for coffee

$ grep -i git commits.txtf■■k gitseriously f■■k gitforgot to add changes from last commit, darn git *shakes fist*Work git dammitI broke gitgit wants me to commit, so i didI swear git sometimes doesnt actually push my code

$ grep -i merg commits.txtok merge went alright thank goodnessidk why mergemerging is pooliterally f■■k merging

$ grep -i s■■t commits.txtFigured that s■■t outStill working on ARP and s■■ts■■tty uc wifi destroyed some of my work but heres a little of the packet handler functionokay i fixed the dumb thing and sorry for pushing broke s■■t to masterIT DOESN'T SEG FAULTTTTTT you can now join s■■t for real and show namesAND NOW THE UNS■■TTENING BEGINS

$ grep -i f■■k commits.txtf■■king echoesf■■k macrosF■■K ALL OF THISthis commit passes all the tests. if i f■■k it up, revert hereI f■■ked something up. Need to revertits f■■king lit

hey look i wrote something

And we're done with robustness and I am SO DAMN HAPPY

ack_seq and ack are NOT the same thing. this was very painful to learn. active opener is entering ESTABLISHED state now

making connection teardown great again

i wrote this retransmission function. i didn't call it. i'm ashamed

Names. is. finally. 100%. Working. F**K YEAH

Fixed many things, but still, nothing works.

wow already messed this one up

Made some functions for channels which would be great IF CHANNELS ACTUALLY WORKED

i think I finally figured s■■t out

welp looks like it wasn't figured out after all

yayayayayayay ■■■■■ figured out the weird arp stuff so it works now

lolwatup

lolwhatup sent back

lolwatdown

Playing with simclist to see if I can remove duplicates from pending_packets

Jk that broke literally everything

Adding context structsdispatch table comingthis is a haiku

All tests pass againwhat a joyous day this isdispatch table works

Fixed some merge conflictsthere is nothing else to sayf■■k f■■k f■■k f■■k f■■k

tweaked input parsingrobustness tests now all passfive more syllables

BREAKING HAIKU FORMAT BECAUSE ALL TESTS PASS

It is 6 in the morning. I have class in four hours. We only have 65.10 points. The work continues.

There are a few things I am ashamed of in life. One of them is that I have been working on this project for seven hours straight. Another is that the code is ugly. But at least we're passing some tests.

Frankencode passes all modes tests. Is this real life?

NAMES is done. The end is in sight, but my end might come first.

Much like my life, most of the code has reached Chernobyl levels of disaster. Much unlike my life, however, everything works and all the tests pass.

Made AmeIRCa great again.

was reinitializing tcp_data because i like causing myself pain. syn, syn-ack are sending

I have pulled more all-nighters in the last two weeks than in the last three and a half years combined (not counting Scav). Whyyyyyyyy, Borja, whyyyyyyyyyyy?

It's breaking more than it used to, but it *feels* like everything works...

The deadline was 8 hours ago but it finally passes all the tests. Or maybe it's still horribly broken and I'm hallucinating because of how sleep-deprived I am.

It's like 10000000% broken but I managed to pass all of the retransmission tests once

TCP stands for Time-Consuming Project. I made some progress on the ESTABLISHED state, but the Long Night is just beginning.

"Oh, my sweet summer child," Old Nan said quietly, "what do you know of fear? Fear is for the winter, my little lord, when the snows fall a hundred feet deep and the ice wind comes howling out of the north. Fear is for the long night, when the sun hides its face for years at a time, and little children are born and live and die all in darkness while the direwolves grow gaunt and hungry, and the white walkers move through the woods."

The night is dark and full of errors

Let's dispel with this fictionthat I know exactly what I'm doing.I don't know what I'm doing.