Market MeltdownStocks crash in heavy liquidation!Total drop of billions!

TOM CALDERA

Granted, a billion doesn’t buy nearly as muchas it did when the gory headline first appearedin the 1929 New York Times, but other than thatit works just fine to describe Thursday’s unex-pected NASDAQ meltdown.

News travels fast out here (and bad news isno exception), but just in case you’ve had yourhead stuck in a cup of Chai for the past 24hours, here’s the naked truth: a minor tech-sec-tor correction on Wednesday turned into awholesale run for the gates Thursday morning,with a flood of automated sell orders at theopening, which triggered massive amounts ofstop-loss sales and shut down trading for near-ly an hour. By the end of the

Saturday, 2 September 2000Black Rock City Population Count:

25,348 (as of noon Friday) Burn Edition, Volume IX • Burning Man 2000

Gridding & CleaningLeave No Trace is not a trendy expression,it is essential to the survival of our com-munity. The creation of each successiveBlack Rock City depends on the clean upefforts of the previous one. This year, alltraces of our existence must be removedby Oct. 5 for us to keep our permit. We are a community, so all of the garbagebelongs to all of us. You must remove alltraces of your camp, then carefully walk agrid over the entire area removing every-thing that is not dried mud. You also mustcontribute two hours to the communityclean up effort in order to make next year’sBurning Man a reality.Your help is crucial to the survival of BlackRock City.

Earth Guardian Camp of the DayThe Midnight Popcorn Palace, at 5:50 HeadWay, is Friday’s Earth Guardians Camp ofthe Day, and they win a free ticket to BM2001. Their creative signage and friendlypersuasion have ensured that popcorn getsconsumed instead of hitting the ground.Watch for future winners and hints onrecycling, composting and dealing withgray water.

Sunday Clean-upWhy rush out on Sunday just to wait inline? Extend that BRC community feelingby joining the clean-up festivities!Starting Sunday at noon in Center Circlenear the Earth Guardian camp, we'll begoing out in teams to attack the trash.There will be special prizes for those help-ing out the most. Many hands make lightwork, and a clean playa will help us ensurethat there is a Burning Man 2001.

AmplificationRegarding the article Update on Arreststhat appeared in the Friday issue of theBlack Rock Gazette, the Pershing Countysheriff's office said the citizen who wasarrested Wednesday night and detainedfor several hours was held at the countyoutpost near the Black Rock City entranceat the request of her family, who askedthat she not be taken to jail.The charges against her, which includeddrug trafficking, required she be held lieuof $5,100 bail, and that could not be raisedin Black Rock City. Her husband had todrive to Reno to obtain the services of abail bondsman.

Celestial Weather Report Things are apt to get pretty intense todayso be careful about how you throw yourwords around. One slightly offensiveremark could turn a friendly fire performerinto a rage that leaves you with all of yourbody hair singed off–sending off a mightystank from here to Winnemucca. Do thingswith passion today. It's all or nothing. Havewild pumping sex that is so amazing thatyour orgasm doubles the number of cracksin the playa. If you are having trouble deal-ing with the emotional intensity of theday, you should seek out a Pisces, Scorpio,

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Today’s Waldo!

FINDHER!

... entered Black RockCity yesterday afternoon. Shower her withgifts, invitations and your very best impres-sion of the Playa Chicken! Give her a melon,RIGHT NOW! She’s Black Rock City’s WALDOfor the day! Make Waldo really, truly happy!Bring proof (and a melon) of your success tothe City Desk for the grand WALDO’s ANGELWINGS giveaway (you nice person, you!)

(So, do you think anyone noticed we used the same cartoon the whole week?)

Burn Heads OTTER

You will be there. Whether you are sober,whether you are working, performing or wit-nessing, whether you are a greenhorn newbieor a crusty veteran, you will be there. It is theone event that virtually everyone in Black RockCity makes it a point to attend. I refer, ofcourse, to the Burn.

But each participant’s experience is different,ranging from the ecstatic to the infuriated. Theincrease in Black Rock City’s population over theyears has also changed the dynamic of the event,with larger crowds resulting in more aggravation.Between frustrated people who cannot see pastthose in front of them, bikes clogging the crowd,and artworks being burned against an artist’swishes later in the night, there is real potential forcelebration to turn into catastrophe.

Boggman, lead trainer for the Black RockRangers, says “No matter how much communitythere is, at the moment when the Man goes up,it’s still personal. People want to crawl into theirlittle pill boxes and have their own experiences.They have to ‘die,’ undergo a catharsis; and thatcan take away from the communal experience.”

“The Burn is the culmination, so people arealready excited,” says Hail Mary, a FirePerformance Safety Coordinator on the B.A.T.(Burn Activities Team) for the past four years.“People get territorial, but that’s a good thing. Ithink that people sometimes forget that wher-ever they are sitting or standing, that’s theirimmediate community. They have the power tomake it worthwhile for everyone, and there are

always solutions in situations like that. Peoplejust need to be respectful and smart, and nottake away from the experiences of others”

Bikes are a necessity for sightseeing in BlackRock City. But, they’re a liability at the Burn. Abike you take into the crowd is a hazard and canparalyze your mobility. A bike left at the out-skirts can be lost or “borrowed.” Hail Mary said,“If people didn’t take their bikes, it would makethe crowd much more comfortable.”

A bike left behind at your camp isn’t neces-sarily safe either. In 1999, several bikes werestolen from camps during the Burn. If you walkout to the Burn, make sure your bike is lockedand secure.

The angst doesn’t necessarily end when theMan topples and the crowd surges forward. Inrecent years, art arson has become a problemfor many artists who either wanted to burn theirart on their own terms, or didn’t want it burnedat all. One artist had created a memorial to hisrecently deceased father, and the burning of thepiece was intended to be a very personal part ofhis grieving. He was devastated when he and hisfamily returned to find the memorial in flames.LadyBee, Black Rock City Art Curator, asks“Why do some folks feel that they are entitledto burn someone’s art installation? Just becausewe’re at Burning Man doesn’t give you permis-sion to destroy someone else’s property. Leavethe self-entitled behavior back in the corporateculture we’ve escaped for a week. IF YOU DID-N’T CREATE IT, DON’T BURN IT!” No one per-son comprises Burning Man, but without thecommunity effort that each individual con-tributes, it would not be possible.

LEFT IS LEFT ... ALWAYS CONT’D ON PAGE 2

(JUMP TO PAGE 2)

Berlin to Burning ManBREEZY

It's 7,000 or so miles from Berlin to BurningMan. Pretty long way, right? Doesn't bother aBerliner, because they are known to simply lovetravelling. Hardly a place in the world where thereisn't at least one of them. In Black Rock City I havecounted three so far; I am number four. Peoplekeep asking, if I came all the way from EuropeJUST to be at Burning Man. YES! Normally Iwouldn't have come this time of the year or evenat all. But I guess normally 30,000 or so peopledon't gather in the desert in the summer either.

Last May a Los Angeles friend told me aboutBM. I got lost in the website for hours. I signedup to volunteer in Center Camp Cafe and theBlack Rock Gazette and was proud to be part ofsomething that I didn't really know anythingabout. I explored the e-playa and got swampedwith daily e-mails that nurtured my excitementabout this adventure I was going to have.

Hanging loose and going wild might be some-thing that comes naturally to you Americans.Most Germans though do that in their cars on thefreeway. Well, yeah, there are raves and there’s aLOVE PARADE where a million people cometogether in Berlin to get intoxicated listening to

techno music, but other than that?So there I was, desperately wanting to attend

BM but not a camper-type at all. How to do thisfrom Berlin? Without the help and sweetness ofsome awesome people that I've met through thee-playa, it would not have been possible to landhere so smoothly. Total strangers invited me tojoin their camp, and brought an extra bike. Canyou believe it? I just love it!

Bewilderment, cynicism, awe, envy andadmiration were the first reactions I got fromfriends at home. The Burning Man idea aboutsharing and all is surely contagious though,because even my tight-ass optician gave me allthe contact-lens equipment I needed for thetrip at no charge!

Now I've been here since Sunday and, ofcourse, have never seen anything like it. I am try-ing to imagine how I will describe this event topeople at home. Before I got here, I read an arti-cle that reduced Burning Man to free sex for allin the desert—I knew there was more to it. By nowit doesn't seem strange anymore to: talk tostrangers; get your neck massaged while sellingcoffee; receive treasures; get hugged; be disgust-ed; be delighted; feel too hot in the sun; use portapotties; have a living room drive by you; and soforth. Yeah, I like it!

Wir sehen uns am Strand!

Staying ConnectedMAID MARIAN & ZMAN

It’s ironic that Burning Man is a leave-no-trace community when you consider the trace itleaves on each and every one of us. And whenyou find your community at last, it’s only natu-ral to want to stay in touch year round.

Those of you with internet access and e-mailare encouraged to stay up to date on BurningMan politics, ticket sales, start date, URL’s andevents by subscribing to the Jack RabbitSpeaks internet newsletter. Send an e-mail tobman-announce-subscribe@burningman.com.The newsletter is intermittent and infrequentbut full of useful information.

Your best one-stop resource for informationby and about the Burning Man community isour Web site: www.burningman.com. Therecently re-designed site is searchable, easy tonavigate and contains all the information youwill need to participate in Burning Man – fromdesert survival to volunteering.

The new "Black Rock City Year Round" sec-tion of the Web site is intended to be a desti-nation for extensive information & connectiv-ity. It will include an on-line zine (let us knowif you are interested in helping this develop),links to other Web sites, articles on participantexperiences, Burning Man friendly businesslistings, and the e-playa BBS area.

Information on how to connect with otherburners in your area can be found underRegional Contacts in the BRCYR section. Thereare 45 contacts world-wide, including theUnited States, Canada, New Zealand, Australiaand the U.K. Regional contacts can be a valu-able source of information about local eventsand gatherings, or simply a good way to con-nect with Black Rock citizens in your area.

The e-playa is also accessible from the frontpage of the Burning Man Web site. Once regis-tered, you can post messages to regional bul-letin boards on a variety of subjects. Chatrooms are also available. Also, the e-playa is agood place to leave messages and your experi-ences for others to enjoy.

Many find calling (415) TO FLAME (415-863-5263) the simplest way stay connected.The information line is updated regularly tokeep it current. Staying connected ensures ourcommunity remains a vital one and that BlackRock City’s spirit endures year round.

TTTT hhhh eeee NNNN aaaa kkkk eeee dddd TTTT rrrr uuuu tttt hhhh

PHOTO BY VISAGARTH

CTHULHIA

Did you go overboard at Trader Joe’s inReno? Would you like to donate food for theBurning Man clean-up crew?

Flying in from the east coast, I bring every-thing by plane and supplement with what Ipick up at thrift shops, Twin Cities Surplus andsupermarkets on my way through Reno. I canreturn most non-food items, but there is noobvious solution for the leftover food.

Last year, I donated leftovers to the BurningMan Commissary. They were unable to acceptmany food items, due to health code restric-tions, e.g. if the box of mac ’n’ cheese is opened,even if the inner bags are sealed, they can’taccept it. The same goes for an opened meshbag of oranges. Of course, your first and bestchoice is to give unwanted food to your friendsand neighbors in Black Rock City.

With the help of the Burning Man staff andthe Food Bank of Northern Nevada, here aresome guidelines to help you Leave No Waste:

Black Rock City Commissary, 5:30 betweenThroat and Heart, Sunday and Monday is theONLY official food donations drop-off point onsite, NOT the Cafe, the Ranger Station, the Gateor Greeter areas. Anyone outside the donationsarea offering to take your unused food is col-lecting it for themselves.

1. Perishable items are hardest to donate, soeat them first—and don't let the rinds and seedshit the ground! In fact, if you MUST buy icefor it, you CAN’T donate the leftovers here.Once frozen foods are thawed, they’re undon-able. Keep it cold until you can donate in Reno.

Too Much Food?

BY CALEB SCHABER

Every citizen of Black Rock City isindebted to the Department of PublicWorks, which erects Black Rock Cityfrom the dusty playa and upholds itsbrief annual existence.

Nine square miles of land are sur-veyed and sectioned off before theDPW places the roads and street signsand builds all public structures,including the coffee shop and TheMan.

DPW is active around the clock. Itstireless mechanics, carpenters,welders and surveyors make this fes-tival possible and more. Last Monday I took mycar out there and traded a fifth of Jack Danielsto have them cut off the doors and roof and addan extra seat.

From June to November, Will Roger is thehead of DPW. For him, the best times are dur-

ing the set up and the tear down. "We build ourown city," he explained, "then all these peopleshow up and fuck it up." For the last few daysbefore the Burn, Roger and his 80-member creware in emergency mode, typically working 18-hour days. A vital element to DPW is the oper-

ations director, Flynn Mauthe. "I couldn't do itwithout him," Roger said.

DPW is an eccentric group and proud of it."You have to have character," Roger said. "Youneed it to smile in a dust storm."

This year, the federal Bureau of LandManagement cut the amount of time allotted tosetting up the city by two weeks and the clean-up time by one month, compared with 1999.

The BLM decision required the immediateremoval of a large amount of fencing. As soon asRoger heard the order, he radioed his staff. "I had40 guys remove 3 miles of fence in two hours."

Roger needs all volunteers he can get to helprestore the playa to BLM standards after thefestival. Every citizen is expected to clean theirown camp space. Anyone who can help withthe rest of the playa should show up at 8 a.m.Monday at DPW headquarters at the end of5:30. After Monday, only DPW staff may stayin Black Rock City.

day, the Nasdaq index lostnearly a quarter of its value,falling to 3,070 in its biggestone-day loss since its inceptionin 1971, on tidal-wave volumeof nearly 8 billion shares.

Servers at E*Trade,Schwab.com, and other onlinebrokerages jammed, delayingtrades for hours and leavingthousands of customers highand dry at the close. Rumors ofhacker attacks are unsubstanti-ated at this time, but may havecompounded the troubles.

Now before you go jumpingoff a tall building, be advisedthat the damage was limitedalmost entirely to the technolo-gy sector, and to the already-bloodied dot-coms in particu-lar. As the money flowed out ofthe Nasdaq, it seemed to cas-

cade into old-economy stocks in near-realtime, leaving the Dow with a healthyeight-point gain, to close at 11,998. TheS&P 500 fared similarly, though not asdramatically, finishing the day at 1,572.

By the time you read this, yourtrusty reporter will be back in the City,taking care of business. As much as Ihate to abandon my post here beforethe big Burn, I feel I have no choice atthis point but to hit the highway, andget myself to a reliable phone connec-tion. Wish me luck!

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Number of media outlets (radio, television, newspapers) serving the citizens of Black Rock city: 44Number of media outlets covering the Burning Man event: 100

Percent of those media outlets that are international: 50Gallons of waste Jonny On The Spot took out of Black Rock City last year: 450,000

Gallons of waste Jonny On The Spot plans to take out of Black Rock City this year: 600,000Cost to rent your own potty for the week: $300 (think about it ...)

Well ain’t it that time agin! My how time flieson the playa, kinda like the dust. I’m sayin’ G’Byenow, cause when they stick a candle up the bigwooden feller’s arse tonight, we all let go. Andsometimes we don’t hook up agin fer another year.

I been pokin’ fun at some stuff this week andmaybe tryin’ to teach ya a few things yer groupcan use on the playa. Hope I helped a little,maybe pass on a smile or two. You all know it’sreal important we take our crap back with us, soTio can have his fishin’ hole back and so we cancome back agin next year.

We also gotta keep the fire burnin’ year round.Dad-blast-it-all-to-hell, I hates to admit it, butI’m really kinda partial to some of you folks.Well, more like ALL you folks. And not just kindapartial either. So let’s figger a way we can keepBlack Rock City alive inside of us until Ol’ Bessiebounces its way back onto the playa next year.Maybe use a good ol’ fashioned address book orsomethin’ like that. I hear tell some of you folkshave one o’ them new-fangled com-pah-tooterthings that send them eel-mails to each other.

So, let’s not get all mushy here. Go on, gitouta-here. What’s this? Oh geez, Uncle Tio’s gotsomethin’ in his dad-blamed eye. Now go on, gitafore I say somethin’ embarrassin’. Dag-nabbit,now I got somethin’ in my other eye. Ya betterget back over here and gimmie a hand. Andwhile you’re here, give Tio a big ol’ hug.

Now git!

Market Meltdown CONTINUED

DPW: The Deep Penetrating Whoop Ass That Makes Burning Man Happen

Vicki Olds, Publisher & Editor-In-

Chief ~ Zac Bolan, Operations &

Volunteers Manager ~ Ed Ingraham,

ZONE & Crossword & Webmaster ~

Larry Breed, Chief Copy & Proof

Editor ~ Blue Collar Bob, I.T. Guru &

Systems Acquisition (BRG2000

masthead designer) ~ Ty Billings,

Circulation, Bags & Signs ~

Saffronlee, Managing Editor ~ Kate

Forster, Daily Editor ~, Mitchell

Martin, Undefined ~ Julia Tenney,

Lead Designer ~ Jamie O'Beirne,

Obtainium Guide ~ Shibumi,

Production ~ Zane5100, Image

Wrangler ~ Highway Star, I.T.

Captain (dos) ~ Otto Maddox,

Cartoonist ~ Shameless Dani,

Disrep Captain ~ Many, many, many

fine DISREPS ~ Graphic Artist:

Bomar ~ The City Desk: Chris Dyer,

Free Will & Simon Orozco ~ Dennis

McMillan, Sister Dana Sez ~

Photographers: WeeGee, John O,

Garth Huddleson ~ Illutrators: the

Badger ~ "Bernie's Index" items:

Heather Schramm (Statistics

Hoarder) ~ Lucky Lisa, Pub Angel ~

Contributing Writers: Uncle Tio,

Otter, Breezy, Tom Caldera, zMan,

Caleb Schaber, Cthulhia ~ Special

Contributions: Marian Goodell,

Larry Harvey and Darryl Van Rhey

~ Muse: all five of our Waldos ~

Vices: Sierra Nevada & Popcorn

Flavored Jelly Beans

DPW kicks ass! WEEGEE

PLAYA WITH FIRE SALEM

If you play with fire you're going to getburned. That's the maxim we've heard fromchildhood. In Black Rock City, that's shortenedto “Play with fire." If you weren't a pyro beforeyou came here, you've got a 99.9% chance ofbeing one when you leave. But your mama andpapa were wrong: you don't have to get burned.

Mike, a graphics art designer from Chicago,was lured by fire performance artists into tryingtheir dangerous art of fireballing, a technique forbreathing fire. After sucking in a flammable fluid,you can seemingly breathe fire while exhalingwith a small flame in front of your lips. Last year,Mike let go his first fireball. It roared. Then hemade a near-deadly mistake: he inhaled. Theflame shot back into his face leaving him withborderline third-degree burns. He's back this yearwith a revived spirit and complexion. He plans onkeeping both. His fire tip: don't inhale.

Mike's fire tip may seem vague, but it is an ele-mental principle of fireplay: it can kill you. That'sfire. Want to burn your stuff? Don't burn it atyour camp. In fact, don't burn it anywhere but atspecially designated areas on the central playa.

XXX (her real name she insists), who for-merly monitored explosions with the U.S. ArmyCorps of Engineers, says “Light can create; lightcan destroy. Intelligent light creates; stupidlight destroys. Fire has a yin and a yang side."

Her advice? No tossing propane into a fire,no MAPP gas, no oxy-acetylene, no hardliquor, and NO COUCHES! Couches producenasty by-products like formaldehyde, hydro-chloric acid, carbon monoxide and dioxin.

Play with fire; don't get burned.

Cancer, Capricorn or Virgo as your life raft -these will be the most stylin' signs of theday. Food of the Day: Donuts. Color of theDay: Sky Blue.

What about those dumpsters?We know you've done your part to makeBurning Man welcome on the playa next year.You brought mesh bags to dry your wetgarbage. You've taken your aluminum to recy-cling camp, you've burned your paper, andnow you're ready to haul your trash outtahere. Wait ... what's that smell? Maybe all ofthat wet trash didn't dry. If you have diligent-ly sorted your garbage and have one smallsmelly bag, you can offload that small bagduring Exodus, on your way out. NO glass, NOaluminum, NO monster bag. We'll take thatone small smelly bag off your hands. Plan totake the rest home with you.

Guerilla Campaign for MayorChimpie The Chimp evolved as the favoredcandidate for mayor of Black Rock City in itsfirst-ever debate for elective office.Chimpie, the third candidate and darkchimp contender, faced off against Johnny,of the Playa Cruisers, and Brettt Roncelli, ofthe Cosmic Love Dome. The three-waydebate, sponsored by the Black RockGazette, became necessary after bothJohnny and Roncelli claimed to be the sole,genuine, legitimate, statutory, mayoral rep-resentative of Black Rock City.Despite the lack of an official electionsstructure, a voice vote of spectators afterthe debate, indicated Chimpie as the clearfavorite.All three candidates scored BIG points.Johnny’s shining moment occurred when anaudience member inquired how he feltabout the use of Chimpie’s native gibberishas a second language, adding the provisothat his response be in gibberish. Johnnyimmediately responded in his best stump-style with the Homeric: "Sit down and shareround won-ton fried grits toasted for yourprotection, we’re trying to raise the bottomwater for your interest."Roncelli also put in a strong showing. Whenthe candidates were asked what kind ofinvolvement could be expected from theirfirst ladies, he replied: "As far as I am con-cerned, there are many ladies involved."In the end, however, it was Chimpie’s touch-ing appeals to the electorate that won theday. When Roncelli demanded if he was "pri-mate enough" to serve as mayor, Chimpie, athis full height, rhythmically thrust forwardhis abdomen, clearly demonstrating that hewas a leading member of Homo erectus.

ErrataThe Black Rock Gazette wishes to apologizefor certain factual inaccuracies in the recentMarket Watch columns by "Tom Caldera."The NASDAQ automated exchange did notcollapse on Thursday, as previously reported.Furthermore, certain "news stories" relatingto U.S. corporations including Oracle andCisco Systems, were patently untrue andentirely satirical in nature. Upon closer exam-ination, the alleged reporter, Tom Caldera,does not appear to exist. We regret anyinconvenience suffered by any of our readers.

Playa Iron Chef Contest Winners Blueberry Pancake Man camp is the winner inboth Best of Show and Best Kitchen/ DiningSet-up categories. Lucky Black Rock Gazettestaffers got to taste chef Suzanne Johnson'sdelicious chicken Phad Thai, cooked on theirfabulous Mongolian grill —handmade by theBlueberry Pancake Man himself, BobShingler. You can congratulate these playagourmets at 4:30 and Sex Drive.

Left Is Left CONTINUED

2. No opened packages of foods can beaccepted at the Commissary, including theouter box or bag.

3. Use your water. (Take a sip after everyparagraph.) After weeks of clean-up, the crewstill had a swimming pool’s worth of waterwhich they emptied onto the playa. The plasticcontainers create a huge trash problem.

Even if you meet all the conditions, be will-ing to drive your donations to Reno.Historically, the clean-up crew can’t use everydonation and much of it will become trash, andvery expensive to remove. Make another stopon the way through Reno.

The Food Bank of Northern Nevada (994Packer Way, Sparks. 775-331-3663) is usuallyopen 9-5 every weekday, but can’t guaranteevolunteer staff on Sunday or Labor Day.

St. Vincent’s Dining Room (505 West 3rd St.,Reno. 775-329-5363) is one block from theSands Hotel. Manager Ray Trevino’s kitchenfeeds 600 people a day, no charge and preach-free. He is protected by the Emerson Act andcan accept any reasonable food donation.Don’t be afraid to just show up.

Do donate to the Black Rock CityCommissary: Undamaged canned goods withlabels intact. Sealed, pre-packaged goods;unopened cans of drink and bottled goods;undamaged, unblemished, whole fruit.

What you can donate to the Food Bank inSparks: All of the above … PLUS: Frozen food ifit hasn’t thawed; refrigerated food (milk, eggs,cheese) if it has remained constantly chilled.

What you can donate to St. Vincent’s DiningRoom in Reno: All of the above … PLUS: Fresh,whole produce in reasonable condition; andpackaged food with outer seals broken butinner seals intact.