those bird cartoons

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elliot

© Mick Elliot - Those Bird Cartoons

Those Bird Cartoonsby Mick ElliotM i c k E l l i o t t a k e s a l o o k a t l i f e t h r o u g h t h e e y e s

o f h i s c h a r m i n g l i t t l e f e a t h e r e d f r i e n d s - t h i s

b o o k i s t h e p e r f e c t a n t i d o t e t o t a k i n g l i f e

t o o s e r i o u s l y .

Th

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h ttp ://www. fa cebo o k . co m/

Th o seB i rdCa rto o ns -

ema i l: mi ck elli o t@me. co m elliot

"This book has helped me and my hordes get through the hardships of conquering places that don't really want to be

conquered... "Genghis Khan

"Verily this is a very funny book, and I should know because I know a bit about writing funny books...."

William Shakespeare

"This is the funniest book what I have ever read... Samuel Johnson

What some of the world's toughest critics

say about 'those bird Cartoons'

More GENUINE praise on the next page

"I only found this book recently and it has inspired me to go out and find other things ... "

Christopher Columbus

"When I first read Those Bird Cartoons I was fascinated by how they got funnier and funnier as I progressed my way through the

book, this got me thinking ... "Charles Darwin

"Ten minutes flicking through Those Bird Cartoons helps me re focus on my music ... "Ludwig Van Beethoven

"I'm going to buy lots of Those Bird Cartoons books and send them to my lady friends as special presents on

Saint Valentines Day ... "A l Capone

What's that?

i phone twittering

it's what i do!What are

you doing? cool

elliot

4


where else?ikea?

elliot

5


Keep a lookout for

Cuckoos

elliot

6


Remember before the recession when

we used to fly everywhere?

elliot

7


elliot

You look a bit down

It's my wife, she wants me to get a

job

what for?

says she's sick of

living on crumbs

8


What's everyone

waiting for?

crumbsseeds

bugs

nutsworms

the burger man

elliot


what's with the shorts?

my wife made them

what for?

She says my legs are

too skinny

elliot

10


that's how humans make love - fancy

giving it a try?

elliot

we'll need to get a

wardrobe


watch out for that hawk, it can see us

from more than a mile away

elliot

12

what hawk?


elliot

OK OK! next

time, we fly


mutter

mutter

groan

moan

I told you, no more brown

elliot

14


let's not get carried away by the

moment

fancy making some eggs?

elliot

15


wanna see a grown man cry? yes

Any response?

he's running... waving his

club!

we have tears

this should do it

16

elliot


are you flying

south for the

winter?

not flying - train, ferry,

hire car

why not fly?

easyjet hand

luggage policy

bastards

you got that right

elliot


18

you go ahead, I'll

give it a miss this morning

another dawn

another chorus

elliot


yo, dude

yo, man

Nice shades,

dude

Thanks, man. but they keep

falling off

why's that

dude?

no ears, man

elliot


what's his

problem?he thinks

he's a bat

20

elliot


Can you play the Guitar?

No, but I'm pretty

good on the piano sorry,I

really need a guitar player

how about

the violin?

I just need a guitarist - not a freak show

What a loser!

elliot


I've been waiting all day for you

22

elliot


He thinks he's an ostrich

What's his problem?

elliot


is it just me, or are

worms getting bigger?

elliot

24


what's with the

kilt?

Scottish ancestry shouldn't

you have a sporran?

that would look silly

elliot

no...


elliot

They look smug

Bankers! and ashamed

How can you tell?

26


You're standing on my mum!

elliot


why won't you buy me a

guilded cage?

elliot

They're not all they're cracked up

to be

28


elliot

promise not to laugh?

bastards!

ha ha ha

he he

he he he

ha ha ha

do it again,

promise we won't laugh

go on, do it again

please


What?Er...

nothing!

elliot

30


Why didn't you use home

delivery?

Where did you

get that?

Tesco Internet's not working

Have you tried switching it

off... then on again?


elliot

I wonder what gave

them the idea that we

liked peanuts

32


elliot

don't you listen to the bbc

No, why?

you're in a no-fly

zone

what's a no-fly zone ?


I hate migration

... I've got another 2,000

miles 0f this

elliot

left a bit.. no right... no left

left... left - sorry... it's right!

mind that cloud... no, the one on the

left.....

34


elliot

What's wrong

with you?nothing

come on, something's

upsetting you

I'm fine

really

Just tell me - it can't be

that bad

ok - I don't like

yellow!


I think we should have

turned left at southampton

elliot

36


elliot

Can't swim, dude!

what's with the stilts,

bud?


Hello - what do you do?

elliot

38


elliot

This is how it works, everyone gets into the cage and does

really silly things

the winner is the last one left


each week, we throw out the

least silly of you

what's the prize?

brief celebrity status...

humiliation... breakdown...

me

me

me

me

me

me


absolutely

elliot

40

do you think these glasses make us look

more intelligent?


That's the 747-100. capacity of 366 first and 452 second class passengers, Rolls-Royce rb211's with

50,000 lbs of thrust, 185,000 litres fuel, maximum range 6,100

miles blah blah etc....

Get a life, dad!

elliot


elliot

It needs a lot of

work

I'm thinking

of making it into a

nestand?

I'm not sure - it's

a big commitment

Just do it!


elliot

And nothing

My Brother got hit by

one of thosejust a

few feathers

and?


tosser!

elliot

cuckoo!Cuckoo!

44


Very cute - but I couldn't eat a

whole one!

I agree, it's

definitely a Share

elliot

45


Yeah Right

It's a bit slow but it's cheap and the ride is silky

smooth

elliot

46


OK... say something

funny

Can I be in a

cartoon?

elliot

too sexist

two chicks come into a bar...

wooa! racist!

OK - a sparrow, a pigeon and a..

Not as easy as it looks

- is it?


47


I wish he'd mow the lawn - I

haven't seen a worm for

weeks

elliot

48


elliot


I am a bird

sorry - only birds allowed in

these strips

elliot

er,,, tweet tweet?Prove

it

Ok - but don't bring any of your weird

friends round

woof woof!


50


what's your story?

elliot

I'm from his first cubist

cartoon


ThaT'S THE THiRD ONE TONiGHT. Do

you think we ought to tell

someone?

elliot

52


That is a pathetic cry

for attention

elliot


well it was your idea to move to the

country

elliot

I can't see a thing in

here... and it's full of

creepy crawlies

54


It doesn't pay much but the

publicity's great...

he tells everyone to watch the birdie

elliot


Oh no! not another walking Holiday

elliot

56


Call yourself a

duck? That's

pathetic

elliot


wow! lets fly up to that

branch and get a closer look

The edge of the universe is 90

billion trillion miles

away

elliot

58


OK, Team, we're 15 nil down in

the first half... any ideas?

elliot

smaller Ball?


what happened to you?

elliot

I flew into a

car wash

60


there should be government

legislation on the use of

pruning shears

elliot


elliot

What kind of emergencies?

what's the parachute

for?

emergencies unexpected ones

62


it's a fun ride but he has

absolutely no homing instincts

elliot


These feeders are all very well but i

always feel a bit sick after dinner

elliot

64


we're covering all our options

elliot

MORE BIRD TABLES

NO MORE BIRD TABLES

?


this is amazing i feel like i'm

actually flying

elliot

66


elliot

Have you had your cup of tea this morning?

my kettle's brokennot

yet...


THat dog will do anything for a

bit of attention

elliot


are you on facebook?

w w w and all

that

you have to admit, he is cute

facebook?

elliot

internet?

You know, the

internet

OH www of course woof woof woof


why don't we just fly?

elliot

what! in this weather?

70


elliot

fancy a dance?

No thanks, i think dancing looks a bit

silly at my age

pretty please

coolcoolcoolcool

He's rubbish!

oh all right

still got it


elliot

It's a horse shoe... they're

meant to be lucky

cool, lets look for the

other one

72


What's an

agent?Are you

an agent?

elliot

Sounds good will you find one for

me?

Someone who sells your talents and makes you rich and famous

And what are your talents?

Apart from asking silly questions.


it's his first sureal

cartoon... works

rather well don't you

think?

mmm!

Oh the pain... the pain

elliot


whats an omlette,

mum?

elliot

are you going to

tell him? or shall i?


elliot

fancy a day out, do lunch

somewhere?

Train, car or bus?

coolcoolcoolcool

I thought i'd fly

actuallyyes, why not?

can't afford public

transport


elliot

can I have my ball

back, please

what ball?


elliot

why don't you fly

anymore?

coocoocoocoo

lost my nerve

what's a bike?

but you're a bird, flying's something you never forget

like riding a bike


er - what about the

last cartoon?

He'll think of something,

come on let's get a cup of tea


http ://www.facebook.com/ThoseBirdCartoons - email: [email protected]

those bird cartoons

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