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Inside The Parenting Lounge

Kristen Miller [email protected] | www.practicalmommy.com

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www.PracticalMommy.com Page 1

Chapters

Introduction

1. Potty Training

2. How To Get Your Kids To Try New Foods

3. Let Go Of The Pacifier

4. Introducing Solid Foods

5. Tips For Transitioning From Diapers to Underwear

6. Tips To Transition To A Sippy Cup

7. Teach Your Child To Be Kind

8. Teach Your Child To Be A Good Friend

9. Handling Sibling Arguments and Fighting

10. What is the ONE THING that would make you a better Mom?

Resources

http://www.practicalmommy.com/



Introduction

As a mom of little kids, there are so many things I have questions about:

how do I get them potty trained?

how do I feed them healthy food, that they can eat and not choke on?

how do I teach them to be kind?

Learn from other moms who have been there.

On PracticalMommy.com I strive to bring together information to make life easier

for moms. But some things I am still learning about myself!

So I reached out to other blogging moms to get their advice and stories. The result

is this collection of the top 10 parenting lounge posts which covers topics such as

potty training, transitioning to underwear and handling sibling arguments.

In total there are 17 posts in the Parenting Lounge series and I have included the

top 10 posts here. Be sure to check out the other 7 posts by going to

PracticalMommy.com and checking out the Parenting Lounge Series.

We're all in this together, so let's share what we have learned through trial and

error and cheer on the other moms as they follow us in this journey through

motherhood!

Thanks for reading!

Kristen





Chapter 1 – Potty Training

If you have parenting questions, then you are in the right place! We will be

attacking a common parenting issue every week and getting real life advice, tips

and stories from other moms who have dealt with the very same thing.

Advice and Stories from Real Moms

The topic this week is Potty Training. Why is this post #1? Well, it is actually the

biggest hurdle we are dealing with in my household right now. My toddler turns 3

next month and it seems like she will never be potty trained. She shows a little

interest but fights us on it every day.

Time to check in with the other Mommy's on our team this week. Moms, how

have you dealt with potty training? Advice please!

Reward them with stickers




When my twin girls were tots, we hung a large piece of poster board for each

child on their bedroom door. When each child successfully used the toilet, they

could pick out a sticker and put it up on the board. You would be surprised how

good an incentive one little sticker can be! - Lauren Kim, Mom Home Guide

Don't rush things

I think it all depends on the child. My first decided to do it on her own fairly easily.

My second, well, let's just say that she still needs some assistance. I would just say

to keep the training fun, praise them and when they are ready, it will all work out.

Don't rush things. - Michelle Lepak, Dandelion Patina

Try a no pants day

My 2 year old used to go to work with me at the daycare. She would see the

preschool kids going potty and always wanted to try. So one day she goes running

through the halls with no pants on trying to find the potty. This little experience

taught us that for her the less time in pants the better. She potty trained in a little

over a month. - Trista, Mama's Little Minions

Start young

My 14 month old currently uses the potty on a mostly regular basis. She pooped

in the tub twice so we got a potty seat to go on the toilet. She was freaked out the

first time she got on so we made sitting on it a routine. She just started to pee on

it. She started getting aware of peeing and she would do it on the potty. Now she

will give me the "potty" baby sign and I put her on every time so she makes the

association. She asks 5-8 times a day and stays dry in between. -

Stephanie, Managing a Home

3 day potty training method


http://momhomeguide.com/

http://www.dandelionpatina.com/

http://www.mamaslittleminions.com/

http://www.managingahome.com/



We used the 3 day potty training method with both of our daughters. The first

two days were incredibly tough with lots of clean ups, but by the time day three

hit, they were potty trained! One long exhausting weekend for each kid, but we

got it done! - Ginger, Gingerly Made

*more info on this method here.

Invest in awesome undies

Wait until your child tells you they're ready, it makes it so much easier. Also invest

in some awesome undies, no kiddo wants to wee on Thomas the Tank or Minnie

Mouse! - Em, Snowingindoors

Have a backup plan

Make sure you have more than 1 idea. What works for one won't always work for

the rest. I remember having to offer toys for my now 5 year old because nothing

else worked. My poor bank account hated me. - Rikki Kruger, OMG Mommy

Moments

Get a timer

We love the timer trick. For the first day, set a timer to go off every 30 min. As

your child has less accidents, you can increase the time until your child is making

it to the potty on his own. - Lady Lilith, Little Lady Plays

Potty Training camp anyone?

Don’t you wish there was a camp to send your kids when it came time to potty

train? Send the kids there and they come back peeing in the toilet, no accidents,

and they even wipe their own butt! Oh I wish! We just started the “adventure” of

pee in the potty and I'll give you ANYTHING you want. - Tahnee, Sincerely Rose


http://www.gingerlymade.com/

http://www.3daypottytraining.com/

http://www.snowingindoors.com/

http://www.omgmommymoment.com/


http://www.littleladyplays.com/

http://www.sincerelyroseblog.com/



They will figure it out!

Don't force it! They will train themselves when they are ready. Try and try and try

again, but don't let it stress you out. Your children will not go to Kindergarten in

diapers! They will figure it out. - Sammi Ricke, Grounded & Surrounded

Thank you Moms!

I just have to say, this is ALL great advice. I am definitely going to get a timer and

try to stress less.


http://www.groundedandsurrounded.com/



Chapter 2 - How To Get Your Kids To Try New Foods

Do you struggle trying to get your kids to try new foods? If they would only try

one bite, they would realize how delicious "insert healthy nutritious food item

here" is and you wouldn't have to make them mac and cheese again tonight. Keep

reading to learn how other moms handle this very situation.

Recently, I took the time to make a healthy, delicious and nutritious meal for my

toddler and baby. I was so proud of myself for having the time and making it

happen. I laid out the silverware, the plates and napkins and sat back with a smile.

My toddler looks at it (just looks!) and says she doesn't like it. Now, after almost 3

years, she has decided she doesn't like "sauce." I lied and said, it's not sauce on

that pasta, it's just pasta. She still wouldn't eat it.




This is an almost daily struggle at my house, so I decided to ask some other moms

what the trick is. Because apparently I don't know it. Here's what they had to say.


Spoon feeding an alligator??

Getting my kids to eat EXACTLY what I cooked is like spoon feeding an alligator.

The amount of time I spend preparing the meal, cooking, cutting, tripping over my

toddler, and nursing standing up does not even compare to the amount of time I

spend coaxing my child to please eat the delicious meal I literally sweat in for you!

- Tahnee, Sincerely Rose

Try your plate

Don't put it on their plate! My two will try anything off my plate, but if I put it on

theirs then it gets ignored. - Em, snowingindoors

Try one bite

I always do the "you have to take 1 bite of everything on your plate" trick and

always had a new food with their favorite so they would take at least 1 bite of the

new food before getting more of their favorite. - Rikki Kruger, OMG Mommy

Moments

A favorite and a new food



http://www.snowingindoors.com/





I used to work with a child who only ate 3 specific foods. She was 2 years old.

Rather then forcing her to eat, I placed the food she loved on the table and spoon

fed her another variety. For the most part, she loved the new food and slowly I

started showing her more and more variety until she was eating basically

everything. - Lady Lilith, Little Lady Plays

It takes time

When my children were born and young toddlers we had not started our journey

towards healthier living. They were accustomed to eating packaged foods. But

now that they are 5 and 6 I can happily say they have now grown accustomed to

eating whole foods instead of junk food. It took time, I am talking years, for these

new foods to become normal for them but it was so worth it! - Sammi

Ricke, Grounded & Surrounded

Sing a little song

While I have attempted many scenarios to encourage trying new foods, from

modeling good eating to using the airplane method, only one has worked. And

that thing is singing the little jingle "You gotta try new foods 'cause they might

taste go-ood! So good!" from Daniel Tiger. That little half dressed tiger can get my

kid to do anything. Except wear pants. - Kayla Aimee, Kayla Aimee

Start young

I think you have to start out young! My Korean mother-in-law babysat my kids for

me when they were babies and would give them all sorts of Korean foods - spicy




http://kaylaaimee.com/



kimchi, dried fish, etc. So, my kids have never been picky with food! - Lauren

Kim, Mom Home Guide

Be a role model

I think being a role model is most important. If they see you trying new things and

liking those foods, they will want to try it too. We have tried to make the food

into fun shapes or make a game out of eating a new food. Sometimes it works,

sometimes it doesn't. I think we just have to remember that we as adults don't

care for some textures, flavors, etc. So, again being a role model and eating

healthy foods will be your best bet for success. - Michelle Lepak, Dandelion Patina

There is no trick

If you figure it out, please let me know! Just the other night my daughter gagged

and gagged because we made her try something that she liked the night before. -

Ginger, Gingerly Made

Make up a story

I usually make up a story about a famous character my daughter likes to get her

to eat foods. The other night we made roast and right now she is really into

Monster High, so I told her that Clawdia loves roast and that she should try it that

way we can write Clawdia and tell her about it. She not only tried it but she ate

my entire portion! - Trista, Mamas Little Minions

Another resource








I actually wrote a post on how we started my daughter off to like new foods,

called Your Baby Eats What?! She always tries everything because we gave her an

interesting palate from the beginning. - Stephanie, Managing a Home

Thank You Moms!

Good to know I'm not the only mom who can't get their kids to try new foods. I

am definitely going to try singing some Daniel Tiger. That's not the first time I

have heard that his songs really work. I have also heard good things about the

potty training and anger songs. Thank you Daniel Tiger!


http://www.managingahome.com/2015/01/your-baby-eats-what.html




Chapter 3 – Let Go Of The Pacifier

It goes by many names - pacifier, pacie, binky. Some moms swear by it and some

hate it. It is blamed for lisps and dental problems when kids get older. But the big

question is - once you start using it, WHEN and HOW do you let go of the pacifier?

Both of my kids have used pacifiers and I am so glad we did. They helped my kids

sleep through the night and comforted them when they were fussy, sick or tired.

I'll never forget that panicked feeling of being out in public and having forgot the

pacifier at home.

With my older daughter, we "planned" to let go of the pacie after she turned a

year old. Our plan was to wean her slowly by only using it for naps and bedtime,

then only naps, then not at all.




Did you notice the quotation marks on planned? Planning anything around kids is

usually not a great idea - nothing goes to plan. I'm to blame though - even though

we had a plan, I didn't stick to it.

My daughter didn't have a hard time letting go of the pacie, I did. Finally, "I" had

to go cold turkey and lose the pacifiers. The next few days were tough, but not as

tough as I thought they would be.


Only at bedtime

We started off by letting the kids use it only at bed time. If they sneak it during

the day, they are picked up and placed in their bed. Before you know it, not

wanting to spend the day in bed, they gave it up in the daytime and soon enough

at night as well. - Lady Lilith, Little Lady Plays

Another vote to start slowly

One of my daughters was extremely attached to her pacy. We had to very

gradually wean her from it. It started with only using pacies at sleeping times and

then we slowly went from there. - Ginger, Gingerly Made

Let it go! Let it go!

We are trying to “give up the binky”. Thanks to the beloved movie Frozen my

child now knows how to say, “Let it go!” Loud and clear she will scream it. We

tried hot potato once with the binky as a distraction to get it out of sight. She

might as well have been standing on tacks she was screaming let it go as if she

were Elsa herself. Now we sing “let it go, let it go, the binky has got to go!” Binky

goes to “its bed and gets tucked in” and she goes to hers. - Tahnee, Sincerely Rose







Some kids just don't like them

We started my kids off with pacifiers (from the hospital), but for some reason,

they never took to them, so we never had that problem! - Lauren Kim, Mom

Home Guide

Let your kid call the shots

The day my youngest daughter turned 1, my husband and I were already planning

on how to wean her off the nuk. That night, she walked to the garbage can in the

kitchen and just threw it away! Apparently she had to call the shots! - Rikki

Kruger, OMG Mommy Moments

Cold turkey

This was a tough one for my oldest daughter. We are an adoptive family and

when we traveled to Ethiopia, the nannies would not have it. They refused to

allow us to use a pacifier. Our daughter did well with it, but it was tough to start

the routine to sooth her with it when we were scolded. Eventually once she was

home then she used it off and on. She loved her bottle way more. Our second

child loved her pacifier. Eventually we just said it disappeared and introduced the

sippy cup instead. - Michelle Lepak, Dandelion Patina

Start early - really early

Never use one. - Stephanie, Managing a Home

Thank You Moms!

I think I'll try singing a little Frozen and losing all the pacies pretty soon.






http://www.practicalmommy.com/wp-admin/www.managingahome.com



Chapter 4 – Introducing Solid Foods

Introducing solid foods is like a rite of passage for baby and mommy. It means

your sweet infant is growing up and needs to start getting their nutrition from

drinking only milk (breastmilk, formula, or a combination of both) to solid foods. It

can be a confusing and scary time for everyone. Here are some tips from moms

who have been there, done that.

Starting my daughters on solid foods was one of the scariest parts of motherhood

for me so far. I was constantly afraid they would either have an allergic reaction

or choke.

Those first few months when they are trying everything new are thankfully behind

me, but my 14 month old still only has two tiny little bottom front teeth. It seems

my kids get their teeth late, since both my girls had absolutely no teeth on their

first birthday. So I still have to be vigilant about cutting things up small and

making she it is soft enough for the baby to eat.





Start with Cheerios

We used the typical cheerios and little cracker snacks. Noodles with sauce was

very popular with my girls when they were young. - Michelle Lepak, Dandelion

Patina

Start with greens

Start with the greens! I made the mistake with my first in giving her sweets like

apples and pears first. It was a tough job getting that girl to eat any of her veggies,

especially anything green. – Brittany, Pennies Into Pearls

Feed them what you are eating

My kids never ate baby food, I would just feed them whatever I was having.

Mostly I just gave them tiny little bites and hold them on my lap so that I can

watch them. By feeding them what I was eating helped introduce them to a wide

variety of foods. – Trista, Mamas Little Minions

Another vote for feed them what you are eating

My 9 month old was having the hardest time adjusting to eating baby food. Then

one day I was sitting on the floor eating ravioli and the little stinker crawls over

and sticks his fingers into my bowl and starts eating the sauce! so we tried

grinding up what we were eating for meals and now no more problems. He eats

everything like a pro now. – Rikki, OMG Mommy Momments

Start with real foods




http://www.penniesintopearls.com/





Don't start on baby cereal. It is bland and has very little if any nutritional value.

Start with real foods like avocado and banana. This way, they will learn to like

flavors from the start. – Stephanie, Managing a Home

Follow your kid's lead

We had one kid who loved jarred baby food and another who refused to let us

feed her anything. She wanted solid food, not pureed and she had to do it herself.

– Ginger, Gingerly Made

Teach them how to chew

For solid foods, I find it is best to place the food directly on the molar teeth. As

this is the natural way to chew, the child is feeling the input from the food. As the

child learns to chew, they will take initiative and within a few feedings, be eating

the food like a grownup. - Lady Lilith, Little Lady Plays

There is no right way

I have no right way for this. It is all different for each child. I try to "go green" first

and fruits second. This way they get used to eating what we eat. – Tahnee,

Sincerely Rose

Thank you Moms!

As with much of parenting, there is no right way to do anything. We have to learn

as we go and every child learns and reacts differently.








Chapter 5 - Tips For Transitioning From Diapers to Underwear

One of the rites of passage for toddlers is transitioning from diapers to

underwear. It is a deal for kids who want to be "big kids." Also, there are some

things like preschool and gymnastics programs that will only allow potty trained

kids. So, once a toddler is in underwear full time, a lot of opportunities open up

for them. (Plus, no more diapers for mom!)

For my preschooler, we moved her up to Pull Ups when she started showing

interest in using the potty. Unfortunately, she was "interested" long before she

was ready to start using the potty.

I think each kids is ready at their own pace, so don't get discouraged by their age,

or their playmates. Listen and watch your child to see what cues they are giving

you. And then just go with it.




My preschooler is now in underwear 100% of the time during the day and we are

about to take away the night time pull ups. We probably waited longer on those

just because the clean up would be difficult if she had an accident.

Here is what other moms have to say about transitioning from diapers to

underwear.


Give them a reward

Reward tots for using the potty. For my twins, my husband and I had a big sheet

of poster board with a line down the middle. (We have twins.) Whenever one of

our girls used the potty, she was allowed to choose a sticker to put on her side of

the board. The stickers were great motivators, and my tots loved them! They

filled up that poster board! – Lauren, Mom Home Guide

Wait until they are ready

My tip is to wait until your child is truly ready. The first time we tried it, our son

thought underwear served the same purpose as diapers, so he made quite a mess

for days. We tried again several months later and were more successful. –

Donella, Glue Sticks and Gumdrops

Never go back

Once you go undies, you never go back. Repeat this mantra. Stick to it. This is one

time it's okay to lie to your child and tell them the store won't let you buy

anymore diapers. Then stay strong and be prepared for lots of messes! It's worth

it.- Valerie, Occasionally Crafty



http://gluesticksandgumdrops.com/

http://www.occasionallycrafty.com/



Let them choose their own undies

We brought Ethan to the shop and let him choose his own undies with his

favourite characters on them. Then after a few days of pull ups we just made the

change! – Stephanie, Play Learn Every Day

Thank you Moms!

This is just another example of choosing what is best for you and your family. This

can be a hard time, as all transitions are. Stay strong, it will happen.


http://www.playlearneveryday.com/



Chapter 6 - Tips to Transition to a Sippy Cup

It seems the hardest parts of parenting may be the transitions. Every time you

think you've got something down - it's time to move on to something new. Just

around the time when you're getting used to giving your baby a bottle or you're

getting the hang of breastfeeding, it's time to start introducing a sippy cup.

When my youngest turned one, her daycare provider started asking us why she

was still using bottles and not sippy cups. Why? Because she didn't like sippy cups.

She wanted to drink her milk from a bottle.

I tried not to stress but I knew we were "behind" in making her take a sippy cup.

She is the second baby, so there is a lot going on at our house and honestly, a

sippy cup really wasn't at the top of my list. Keeping two little kids happy, clean

and quiet was my top priority - so that meant continuing to give Maddy a bottle.

The truth is that there is no time table for this stuff to happen. Go at your baby's

speed and watch her cues. I worried about my daughter not using a sippy cup for




a few months, but in the end she started using one exclusively when she wanted.

One day it was bottles, the next it was sippy cups.

Here is what other moms have to say about introducing pets to new babies.


Get the right cups for your baby's age

Transitioning from bottle to sip cup can be something fun and exciting for your

little one. I love introducing new things as the baby gets older. When introducing

a sippy cup we like to start with just water and let our little one play around with

it. It's going to be a bit messy but it's only water! Make sure to look on the

package label to get the age appropriate sippys for your babies age. – Brittany,

Pennies Into Pearls

Use something easy to drink from

We used the tupperwear kids cups with the lids. It is not spill proof, but really

easy for the kids to drink from. My kids all started with water at around 6 months,

so when they were no longer nursing or using a bottle, they were already familiar

with how to use a cup. – Amanda, The Educator's Spin On It

Don't give in to drinking strikes

After my first daughter, I learned that the best method of transitioning from a

bottle to a sippy cup is to just do it! Your child will look at you with those big

beautiful eyes and she or he will cry and scream and do their very best to drive

you insane. They also may go on a drinking strike but I promise, they will give in!

Biggest lesson with transitioning is to not let them see you sweat! – Aimee, House

of Fauci's



http://www.theeducatorsspinonit.com/

http://houseoffaucis.com/

http://houseoffaucis.com/



Earlier is better

After seeing both my girls through many early childhood transitions, as well as

observing my friends’ experiences, the earlier you introduce a sippy cup, the

easier your transition will be. The older a baby gets, the more attached they

become to objects. Instead of merely a feeding method, a bottle can become a

soother, just like a pacifier or blanket, making the transition far more difficult. –

Meghan, Playground Park Bench

Start with solids

Start young! We did so when my baby was starting solids and drinking water. –

Menucha, Moms and Crafters

Thank you Moms!

This is just another example of choosing what is best for you and your family. The

key is to realize that this is a transition. It's not an overnight change. So take your

time and go slow and don't stress about a sippy cup.


http://playgroundparkbench.com/2015/01/transitions-goodbye-bottle/

http://momsandcrafters.com/



Chapter 7 - Teach Your Child To Be Kind

Do you struggle with how to teach your child to be kind? It's not quite the same as

teaching them good manners, although it's similar. This isn't about "Thank You"

and "Excuse Me." This is something more intangible - how do you teach your child

to be kind when there is no solid word, or phrase or pattern to give them.

How do you teach your child to be kind?

Being kind is not just a one time act for anyone and it's not always the same thing

in different situations. Teaching your child to be kind means that you have to

teach them:

Empathy and Compassion

Right and Wrong

Fairness

Decision making skills




All of these factors come to play when your child acts either kindly or unkindly.

Along with all these skills, modeling good behavior is a number one parenting

goal. By modeling kindness, your child can begin to see it in action and learn how

to be kind themselves.

Here is what other moms have to say about teaching their children to be kind.


Teach by example

I think you have to teach by example. I am kind to my children, and in return, they

have become very kind young ladies! – Lauren, Mom Home Guide

Model good behavior

We work on this through modeling kind behavior, providing social interaction

with other children and by reading books that promote kindness. A grumpy

toddler can still be unkind, though. - Donella, Glue Sticks and Gumdrops

They will mimic you

Your kids mimic you. If you're kind, they'll see that. – Albion, AlbionGould.com

They learn by example

Children learn by example. When "you" come out of your child's mouth, you'll

realize how important your example is. Be kind, tell them to be kind, show them

what kindness is. – Valerie, Occasionally Crafty

Lead by example




http://albiongould.com/

http://www.occasionallycrafty.com/



I think that the most important thing is to lead by example, by being kind to them

as well as people that you encounter through the day. – Nikki, Play Learn Every

Day

Thank you Moms!






Chapter 8 - Teach Your Child To Be A Good Friend

Childhood is about making connections and learning. Children learn through play

and it's important that they have other children in their life to play with. Whether

it's siblings, school friends, neighbors or cousins, it's important to teach our

children how to be a good friend.

The first step to having good friends is learning how to be a good friend.

How do you teach your child to be a good friend?

My older daughter is the opposite of shy. She will run up to any new child she

meets and they are instantly her new best friend. Although my younger daughter

is only one, I can already tell she will be the shy sister.

Since my older daughter jumps into being best buddies with other kids so quickly,

I need to teach her the subtleties of how to be a good friend. How to empathize

with other children and imagine how they are thinking and feeling.





Take something to share with friends

We've been teaching our three-year-old about sharing with friends. Recently, we

have started taking small "gifts" such as a sticker pack or bouncy balls when we're

out with friends so that our son can share them with their kids. It has helped a lot,

because as an only child, he really doesn't have to share much. - Donella, Glue

Sticks and Gumdrops

Tell them when they are being a good friend

I try to point out when they are being a good friend or when someone else is

being a good friend. – Brittany, Pennies Into Pearls

Teach them that some "friends" aren't really friends

My oldest daughter has had issues with friends in the past. Friends who have

treated her family with disrespect, friends who have tried to steal her boyfriends

and so much more. I always tell her that friends come and go, but the ones who

respect you and want to truly be your friends are the ones who treat you the way

they want to be treated and that she should always do the same thing. Respect

and trust are earned and she shouldn't give them away before their earned. -

Vina Kent, The Full Time Schoolhouse

Find someone with a good heart

To be a good friend they need to choose their friends wisely. They will only want

to be a good friend to someone they genuinely care about. It's not about

popularity or who has the nicest stuff. If they find someone who has a good heart,

being a good friend will come easy. It's all about being there and never going back





https://thefulltimeschoolhouse.wordpress.com/



on their word. Good friends are hard to come by...so I want them to know to hold

that close! – Dana, Momma Didn't Say

Ask them lots of questions

This is such a difficult thing to teach because we want our children to learn how to

function within their peer groups without us hovering, but we also want to teach

them this important life skill. We are in the depths of teaching this right now with

our 6 year old daughter. Believe it or not there is girl drama as early as 1st grade!

We stress that to have friends she must first be a good friend to others by

showing kindness and not excluding others. I try to ask LOTS and LOTS of

questions like, “How did that make you feel when she did/said that?” “How do

you think that made her feel?” “What can you say/do next time that situation

happens?” I believe by doing this it has validated my daughter’s feelings and

taught her the words for what she and others in the situation are feeling. - Sammi

Ricke, Grounded & Surrounded

Teach them by sharing your own friendships

I share with them sweet or helpful things friends have done for me and let them

know how it really makes me appreciate my friend's friendship. – Lauren, Mom

Home Guide

Give them time to play

We teach them to be friends by giving them time to play. They always seem to be

better together when mom is not hovering around making sure "this or that" does

not happen.- Tahnee, Sincerely Rose

Encourage them to go play with new friends


http://www.mommadidntsay.com/







I encourage my children to look around them and be aware of how others are

feeling. If they see someone who is playing by themselves, I encourage them to go

over and ask that person to play. Kids are inherently self-centered, but with the

right coaching they can become aware of how their actions impact others. - Sarah

Koontz, SarahKoontz.com

Role play with them about their friends feelings

By role playing. My kids are still young so it's up to me to teach them how to

behave. I remind them to think about their friends feelings. – Tasia, Batavia's Best

Bargains

Instruct in the moment

I've had a few conversations with my 3 year old. Mostly, I instruct him in the

moment, sort of like feeding him lines off stage. I think he is beginning to

understand. He's walked up to a few of his friends at school, unprompted, and

offered comfort when they are crying or invited them to play. – Marie Osborne,

MarieOsborne.com

Thank you Moms!

Friendship is so important for young children to learn and grow, but also as older

children and adults interacting in society. The key is to be mindful and aware of

our children's relationships and actively teach them how to express themselves

around others.


http://sarahkoontz.com/

http://www.bataviasbestbargains.com/

http://www.bataviasbestbargains.com/

http://www.marieosborne.com/



Chapter 9 - Handling Sibling Arguments and Fighting

Sibling arguments and fighting is something every mom has to deal with because

it's a fact of life that siblings will fight. Kids in general are learning manners and

how to interact with other people daily and fighting is their way of expressing

themselves and their feelings. But we as parents need to direct their learning so

they don't harm others.

I remember when I was little, my sister and I use to fight so much! But now we

are really close to each other. I hope that my daughters have the same experience

(maybe with a little less fighting of course).

How do you handle your kids arguing and fighting?

My toddler and baby have recently started arguing and fighting. It happens mostly

when my older daughter takes a toy away from her baby sister. I can understand

how everything used to belong to my older daughter, but this is one of the best

times for me to teach her how to share.




Whenever my toddler takes a toy from her sister, I tell her to give it back or give

her sister another toy. Usually the baby is satisfied if it's a good toy, so everyone is

happy. I love seeing them start to practice this sharing on their own, when my

toddler hands the baby a new toy and the baby hands her toy to her older sister.


Calm them down first

First thing we do is calm down. Sometimes they will need to be separated for a

few minutes. Once everyone is calm then we get everyone back together, talk

about what happened, then talk about why it's important to be nice to each other

and love each other. – Brittany, Pennies Into Pearls

Separate them

This is hard, the two that fight are 10 years old and 3 years old and you would

think they would kill each other when they fight. Normally I separate them both

and tell them about why they shouldn't be fighting. Then they have to give hugs

and say sorry. – Trista, Mamas Little Minions

Listen to them

I always try to listen to my children as their voices rise in frustration. Then I sit

them down and talk with each one individually to try to figure out what is

happening. Giving them each a chance to talk about it generally helps me to

decide what discipline is appropriate (if any). - Sarah Koontz, SarahKoontz.com

Ignore them







I usually ignore them. As long as no one is missing a body part and no one is on

fire, they can argue until they are blue in the face. Choosing my battles? I choose

to ignore! – Dana, Momma Didn't Say

Laugh

I have identical toddler twins. Right now, sibling arguments consist of hair pulling

and screaming at or chasing each other when someone steals a toy. I'm super

mature so, you know, I mostly just laugh. Then separate and redirect them. But

still I'm still laughing. – Marie Osborne, MarieOsborne.com

Never take sides

I never take sides. I just tell them I love them and not to fight. Distracting them

from the argument also helps. I find that if I switch on the TV to a show or movie

they like, they will forget all about their argument. But luckily, my kids don't argue

much. – Lauren, Mom Home Guide

Make them share

Recently we have had the constant saying, "If you both can't share, then no one

gets it." This is not working. We have found that holding the item in front of them,

asking who had it first, and then saying, "Can you ask your sibling to have it next?"

This has been a life savor! – Tahnee, Sincerely Rose

Ask them how they feel

First, I get their attention and ask them to be quiet. I then get down on their level

so I am not preaching "at" them but rather talking "with" them. I ask them to

each explain what happened and how it made them feel. Usually, if I can get them

to address how the situation made them feel we can resolve the issue quickly by

apologizing and correcting the behavior whatever it may be; bossiness, taking








without asking, etc! Of course, 100% of our situations are not resolved this easily,

but most of the time! This is the real world after all! Ha! - Sammi Ricke, Grounded

& Surrounded

Thank you Moms!

Just remember, one fight won't destroy their sibling bond. Family is forever and

they will learn to get along as they get older. Find what works for your family.






Chapter 10 - What is the ONE THING that would make you a better

Mom?

Whatever stage of life we are in, and whatever stage of childhood our kids are in,

I think most of us spend our days knowing we could have been a better mom.

That sounds a little depressing at first. That doesn't mean you're a bad mom or

that you've done anything wrong. It just means that we feel that we could have

done things better. This is actually a very positive feeling.

Did you let your kids watch too much TV? Did you give them a cookie when they

begged instead of giving them a healthier snack? Did you check Facebook one too

many times when you should have been playing peek a boo?

What is the ONE THING that would make you a better Mom?

For me, it would be patience. I would give myself more patience to deal with my

little ones on a daily (hourly) basis. I would try to keep my cool when my toddler

runs off and doesn't listen to me to come back. I would be calmer and more




understanding when my baby has trouble sleeping through the night because she

is teething. If I had more patience, I think I would be a better mom.

If you could change one thing, what would it be?


More quality time

Not being so busy! I always find myself at the end of the day saying that I should

have spent more quality time with my kids. Playing games, make believe, playing

in the kitchen together, or playing outside. – Brittany, Pennies Into Pearls

Just be present

I have to constantly remind myself not to multi-task. I need to put down the

phone, put the to-do list aside and just be present with my son. It's so hard

sometimes, because we want to do things for our families, but sometimes they

just need us to be WITH them rather than doing things for them. – Donella, Glue

Sticks and Gumdrops

Patience

As a mom I really have a problem with patience. I need more of it. – Trista,

Mamas Little Minions

More patience

For me the biggest thing is having patience. When my son insists on picking his

nose and wiping it on his sleeve, I'm the first one to say, "go get a tissue and do

that in private." His response, "why mom they're natural just like farts." So I have

got to learn to just laugh and realize that with a little patience he will understand



http://www.gluesticksandgumdrops.com/

http://www.gluesticksandgumdrops.com/




that one day, hiding the picking of his nose will have to happen, especially if he

wants a girlfriend. - Vina Kent, The Full Time Schoolhouse

Less is more

To stop being an overachiever. Each day I want to embrace the less is more

motto. By changing my perspective I can see the beauty in all things, especially my

children. – Tasia, Batavia's Best Bargains

Stop working too much

Hello, my name is Marina and I am a workaholic. Even though I work from home, I

believe that I am spending too much hours working. I've always been workaholic

and just can't live without work. I even get nervous when I finish the project and

there is nothing for me to do at the moment. I am always thinking of new ideas

and just can't relax and just enjoy the life. I think I would be much better mother

if I can just learn how to let go of work and enjoy some nice activities with my

toddler without thinking what will I do next with my work project. – Marina,

Parental Journey

More time

The ONE THING that would make make me a better mother would be more time.

Sometimes all I need to be a better mom is a little bit of time to decompress and

then get right back to it. But it seems as though there is never enough time to get

anything done, let alone time for me. So that would be amazing! – Dana, Momma

Didn't Say

Don't compare yourself to other moms

Stop comparing myself to the younger Moms. And, realize that my son doesn't

care if his mommy is older than the other Mommies, has gray hair and wrinkly


https://thefulltimeschoolhouse.wordpress.com/

http://www.practicalmommy.com/wp-admin/www.bataviasbestbargains.com

http://www.parentaljourney.com/





skin. As long as he knows I love him more than anything in the World!! – Kim, This

Ole Mom

Sleep

I struggle form insomnia since baby #2 and feel I have neglected my "parental

duties", such as cleaning. The one thing I remember is to give my kids the

attention they need despite being sleep deprived. With love and patience. I don't

want them to remember how tired mom was, but the fun we had together. –

Tahnee, Sincerely Rose

More sleep!

More sleep! Being a mom is challenging enough! Trying to do it in "zombie" mode

is nearly impossible. - Sarah Koontz, SarahKoontz.com

More Me time

Dear Children, I would be an awesome mom if you took longer naps. Because

then I could nap and binge watch Netflix and read for a while and feel like a real

person before you woke up to remind me you are the boss of me. - Marie

Osborne from MarieOsborne.com

Thank you Moms!

What I hear over and over again is that there is just not enough time in the day

for everything we need to do - be present for our kids, sleep, work, clean, Me

time. We need to prioritize the things we need to do and realize that we can't do

it all. Move some things from the "need to" list to the "want to" list (like

cleaning!) and relax a little bit. Good luck Mommies.


http://www.thisolemom.com/

http://www.thisolemom.com/






Other Resources in The Parenting Lounge Series

1. Introducing A New Baby To The Family

2. Social Media and Your Kids

3. Your Kid’s First Cell Phone

4. Do You Give Your Kids An Allowance?

5. Introducing Your Pets To A New Baby

6. When Should Kids Do Their Own Laundry?


http://www.practicalmommy.com/introducing-a-new-baby-to-the-family-parenting-lounge-5/

http://www.practicalmommy.com/social-media-and-your-kids-parenting-lounge-7/

http://www.practicalmommy.com/your-kids-first-cell-phone/

http://www.practicalmommy.com/do-you-give-your-kids-an-allowance/

http://www.practicalmommy.com/introduce-your-pets-to-a-new-baby/

http://www.practicalmommy.com/kids-laundry/

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