"the blind side of success & failure" (tedx sinchon)
DESCRIPTION
"The Blind Side of Success & Failure: Ideas from The Second City experience" presented by Hoh Kim, Founder & Head Coach, THE LAB h, @ TEDx Sinchon, Seoul, Korea, on August 28, 2010TRANSCRIPT
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‘the blind sides’ of success and failure:
ideas from The Second City experience
TEDx sinchonaugust 28, 2010
hoh kim (twitter: @hoh / blog: hohkim.com)founder & head coach, THE LAB h (thelabh.com)
C.Interaction Lab, Graduate School of Culture Technology, KAIST
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success trend
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0
2.25
4.5
6.75
9
‘96 ‘97 ‘98 ‘99 00’ 01’ 02’ 03’ 04’ 05’ 06’ 07’ 08’ 09’ 10’
work moneypeople play
internae
mgr
marriage
dmd
md
divorce
start-up
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professional focus
• ‘bad news’: how it is ‘produced’ and how we should prevent & manage >> deal with many failures (mistakes or wrongdoings)...
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context
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1. why?
• “successful failure” vs. “failed success”
• we are interested in success.
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obviously, success is a more popular topic than failure
online book stores/key words amazon (u.s.) kyobo (korea)
success (s) 110,614 12,936
failure (f) 14,880 1,390
f/s (%) 13% 11%
searches done on August 25, 2010amazon: book category search
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strong interests in success does not necessarily mean we know it inside out.
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2. how?
outside / inside
success failure
success the best case scenario(very very lucky!)
2nd best case scenario
failure 2nd worst case scenario
the worst casescenario
(really really screwed up!)
“(in the beginning) it looks like...”
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“(in the end) it becomes...”
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my best friend kang-hee once told me that our successes and failures are like
“coin-tossing experiments.”
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 h t
p1 t t h t t t t t t h 2 8
p2 h h t h t h h h h h 8 2
p3 t h h h h h h h t h 8 2
p4 h t h t h t h h h h 7 3
p5 t t t t t t h h h h 4 6
p6 t t t h h t h t t t 3 7
p7 h t h h h t t h t h 6 4
p8 h h t h h t h h t h 7 3
p9 t h t t t t h t h h 4 6
p10 h t h t t h t t t t 3 7
totaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotal 52 48
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h=head/t=tail
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now, turn the table into “success & failure table”
in different stages of our lives20s’20s’ 30s’30s’ 40s’40s’ 50s’50s’ 60s’ and after60s’ and after s f
p1 f f s f f f f f f s 2 8
p2 s s f s f s s s s s 8 2
p3 f s s s s s s s f s 8 2
p4 s f s f s f s s s s 7 3
p5 f f f f f f s s s s 4 6
p6 f f f s s f s f f f 3 7
p7 s f s s s f f s f s 6 4
p8 s s f s s f s s f s 7 3
p9 f s f f f f s f s s 4 6
p10 s f s f f s f f f f 3 7
totaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotaltotal 52 48
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so what?• min. 10 yrs ~ max. 40 yrs of success
• 5/6 = higher success rate in early stage (10+ yrs of success in 20s’-30s’) generate higher success rate in later stage (10+ yrs of success in 40s’-50s’)
• 2/4 = 50% of those with lower success rates in early stage (less than 10 yrs of success in 20s’-30s’), still enjoys higher success rate in later stage (10+ yrs of success in 40s’-50s’)
• surprisingly, 8/10 experiences success in the end!
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3. what?(jumping to conclusions)
• success & failure have their blind sides: ‘failure inside success’ or ‘success inside failure’
• success & failure are more about attitudes/characters, not events.
• you cannot find the blind sides by yourself, but, only by others’ help. that’s why a great friend or mentor matters for your success.
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real problems with s/f
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my friend & mentor, david chard, told me“failure is just a bump in a road”
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success failure
about you
“i am such a perfect person!”(well, you were lucky)
“i am a loser”(failure happens when you ‘label’ it!)
about others
“what a loser...”(next time, they can succeed,
and you might need their help)
“they are the winners!”(you can be a winner next time or
later! life is not that short)
about future
“if i keep doing the same thing...”(well, as Marshall Goldsmith told ‘what got
you here, won’t get you there!’)
“there will be no success in my life!”(positive things will come to you,
when you think positively!)
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solutions ideas from The Second City experience
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The Second City is the world's premier comedy theatre and school of improvisation, started in Chicago in 1959. The Second City has been called "A Comedy Empire" by the New York Times. http://www.secondcity.com/about/Photos are provided by The Second City
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1. “yes, and...”
• say “yes” to your success and failure
• “and” take further actions to sustain your success or turn around your failure into success
• every failure has a take-away message about success
• if you made a mistake or wrongdoing, then, say “yes, i made a mistake (it was my fault), i’m so sorry, and i will do...”
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2. “character”
• it’s ok to play a jerk (cruel, rude, or small-minded*) on a stage in theatre
• don’t be a jerk on a “stage in society”
• great skills/knowledge + bad attitudes = wrong & failed character in society
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*definition from webster.com
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3. “ensemble”
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i do know i do not know
others do know open blindothers do not know
hidden unknown
johari window
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we all need ‘left tackles’(best friends / great mentors)
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(source: usatoday.com)
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final thoughts
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conclusions
• success or failure is not (an) event (s), but, more about our attitudes (how to approach ‘successful/failed experiences).
• it’s important to find the blind sides of each success and failure, and do something about it.
• but, we cannot find the blind sides by ourselves, so, we need a great friend or mentor who can tell us the truth.
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but, how can i find the real friend/mentor?
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Dr. Robert Cialdini, the most influential figure in the area of science of influence, the author of global million seller “influence,” after studying 60+ years of research in
psychology of influence, taught me:
smart people avoid asking only “who can help me here?”
but, first ask“whom can i genuinely help here?”
well, that’s the secret to make great friends.
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“happiness” trendssuccess vs. happiness
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0
10
20
30
40
‘96 ‘97 ‘98 ‘99 00’ 01’ 02’ 03’ 04’ 05’ 06’ 07’ 08’ 09’ 10’
work (career)money (finance)people (relationship)play (culture)HAPPINESS
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‘the blind sides’ of success and failure:
ideas from The Second City experience
TEDx sinchonaugust 28, 2010
hoh kim (twitter: @hoh / blog: hohkim.com)founder & head coach, THE LAB h (thelabh.com)
C.Interaction Lab, Graduate School of Culture Technology, KAIST
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