success habits workshop_redesigned -fdp

8/6/2019 Success habits workshop_Redesigned -FDP

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Success Habits workshop

S G Raja Sekharan


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Let us start with some introspection

Can you describe briefly your dream job In 5 years what do you aspire to be

In 10 years what do you aspire to be

In 15 years - what do you aspire to become

What current salary would make you feel good

Beyond dream salary and dream job, whatelse do you want (in the next 1-2 years)

What do you want out of life in the long run


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How will the success habits help you

Get control of your life Make smarter decisions

Improve your relationships with your friends

Get along better in society

Define your values what matters more toyou

Get more done in less time

Find balance between work, family, friendsand everything else


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The Seven habitshe Seven habits 1. Be proactive Take responsibility for your life2. Begin with the end in mind Define your mission

and goals in life

3. Put first things first prioritize, and do the mostimportant things in life

4. Think Win Win have an everyone can winattitude

5. Seek first to understand and then to beunderstood Listen to people sincerely

6. Synergise Work together to achieve more

7. Sharpen the Saw Renew yourself regularly


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Be ProactiveBegin with the end in mind

Put first things first


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Have you heard statements such as My career has taken a beating because of various

reasons beyond my control

I feel that I have done as well as others but Idont see my case being taken up by my boss well

enough I am open I am giving the option to my HOD to

make the necessary changes to my role

If I had her / his looks, Id be popular too

There is nothing I can do I have to do it because ..


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Proactivity Defined:

Stimulus Response


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Proactivity defined: I am the force, I am the captain of my life. I

choose my attitude. I am responsible for my ownhappiness or unhappiness. I am in the driversseat of my destiny I am not just a passenger.

Proactive people make choice based on values they think before they act they are calm, cooland in control. Reactive people make choice

based on impulse.


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Our language will tell us whether we areProactive or Reactive

Reactive language Proactive language

I will try

There is nothing I

can do I have to

You ruined my day

I will do it

Lets look at options

I choose to I am not going to let

your bad mood ruboff on me


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Reactive vs Proactive people

Reactive people Blame others Whine and complain Wait for things to

happen to them Are easily offended Get angry and say

things they regretlater

Proactive people Take responsibility for their choices Are not easily offended Think before they act Bounce back when something bad

happens Always find a way to make things

happen Focus on things they can do

something about, and dont worryabout things they cant


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Circle of Concern

Circle of Influence


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Circle of Concern

Circle of Influence


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Its your life, take charge

Take charge of yourlife; Don't wait foranybody: Take theinitiative always.

Every situation,presents variouslimitations forperformance

Understand what can beinfluenced by you (circleof influence)

Dont worry about whatyou cant influence (circle

of concern)

Focus your energies on things you can

control rather than worrying about

things over which you have no control.


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So much has been given to me. Ihave no time to ponder that which

has been deniedHelen Keller


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On the road of life, there are passengersand there are drivers .

drivers wanted

Volkswagen commercial


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Proactivity means telling ourselvesthat:

We are responsible for our own lives.

Our behavior is a function of our decisions not

our conditions.

We have the initiative and the responsibility tomake things happen first I take responsibilityand then I have a Can Do attitude.


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They cannot take away our selfrespect, if we do not give it to them

Mahatma Gandhi


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No one can hurt you without yourconsent

Eleanor Roosevelt


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Here is a good example I found :

Whether I fail or succeed shall be no mansdoing but my own.I am the force.I can clear any obstacle before me or I can

be lost in the maze.My choice, my responsibility; win or loose,only I hold the key to my destiny


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What can I do today to start this Habit:

We arent completely proactive or completely reactive we are somewhere inbetween. The key is to get into habit of being proactive more than before.

Some of the things that we can do:

Do something today that you always wanted to do but never dared.

If you get into a fight /misunderstanding, be the fist to apologize.

Listen carefully to how many times you use reactive word like I cant___ , They make me____ , I have to ____ .

Identify something that is in your circle of no control an stop worryingabout it

Ask yourself what is my most unhealthy habit and do somethingabout it.

Stick a Post It note I am not going to let _____ decide how I feel. andrefer to it often.


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Lets just go through this

scenario


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Relationship Character/ contribution / achievements

Father/

Spouse /

Friend


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Your mission statement

What you have justwritten is what youwant to be what ismost important toyou

You have a purpose inlife. You know in yourheart what's mostimportant to you. Infact, your missionand values areexpressed every day,by how you live - youjust may not realizeit


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Begin with the end in mind

Begin with the end in mind means developing aclear picture of where you want to go withyour life. It means deciding what your valuesare and setting goals.

Habit 1 (Be proactive) says - Be the driver not the passenger

Habit 2 (Begin with the end in mind) says -

Since you are the driver, decide where youwant to go and draw a map to get there


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Personal mission statement:

A *personal mission statement* is a briefdescription of what you want to focus on, what you want to

accomplish and who you want to become in a particular area of

your life over the coming years.

It is a way to focus your energy, actions,behaviors and decisions towards the thingsthat are most important to you


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Examples of a mission statementsI aspire to gain the respect and admiration of others by

being open, honest, fair and reliable. I will treat allpeople with the respect I want and will expect little,but will give a lot. I will keep to my word and will finishwhat I have started.

To educate, motivate and enable myself and all those

who know me to achieve self actualization and becomeeverything that God destined us to be.

I WILL be a better daughter, sister, student,teammate, and friend by improving on my qualitieslike organization, responsibility, and compassion.

I WILL become a respected and noted leader to thosewho surround me through taking charge andsucceeding in difficult situations."


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It means to start with a clear understanding of your destination

and a clear understanding of where you are now so that the steps

that you take are always in the right direction


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It means to begin today with the image, picture of yourend of life as your frame of reference by whicheverything else is examined.

Each part of your life todays behavior, tomorrows

behavior, next weeks behavior, next monthsbehavior can be examined in the context of thewhole, of what really matters to you most.

We may be very busy, very efficient -but we will betruly effective only if we begin with the end in mind


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All things are created twicefirst is mental creation and then comes the

physical creation


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There is always a first creation and asecond creation

Before we go on a trip, we plan it first in the mind

Before we build a house, we plan it first on paper

All athletes are visualizers they see it, feel it, visualize itbefore they actually do it

To the extent we understand this concept of two creations

and take responsibility for both

we increase our circle of control

If we dont take responsibility of the first creationSomeone else will do it for us and

we will be in reactive mode

B i ith th d i i d N t


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Begin with the end in mind Nextsteps Once you have a mission in place go for the GOALS

it is more specific, more measureable and it breaksthe mission into achievable steps with timedeadlines

Count the cost of not achieving the goals what will

happen if you do not achieve the goals Put the goal to paper write it

Just do it - Dont say Ill try; Say I will. When youtruly commit to achieving something, circumstances

come together to help you achieve it Share your goals with people close to you take their

help and advice.


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What can I do today to start this Habit

Fine tune the mission statement today to makein closer to what is truly important to you

Review your mission statement daily for 30days let it guide you in all your decisions

Determine three most important skills that youwill need to get what you aspire for make aplan to improve on those skills and implement it

Start writing a personal diary where you can

honestly appraise the events of the day andhow you felt about it


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The three habits defined:

Habit 1 (Be proactive) says - Be the driver not the passenger

Habit 2 (Begin with the end in mind) says -Since you are the driver, decide where you

want to go and draw a map to get thereHabit 3 ( Put first things first) says Get there

Dont let road blocks knock you off course


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Lets start with a question to self

What are the top 4 activities that currentlytake up most of your time

What are the top 4 activities you would like tospend most of your time


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Time Management Matrix

Urgent tasks Tasks that require immediate attention.

These are usually visible tasks they press on us these tasks insist on action they are often easytasks, fun to do.

Important tasks Tasks that require more initiative, more proactivity. These tasks contribute to your mission, your high

priority goals.

Ti M t M t i


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Time Management MatrixUrgent Not urgent

Important

Notimporta

nt

Quadrant I Quadrant II

Quadrant III Quadrant IV

Ti M t M t i


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Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

rta

nt

Friend gets injured

Late for work

Project due today

Vehicle breaks down

Quadrant II


THE PROCRASTINATOR




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Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

rta

nt

Friend gets injured

Late for work

Project due today

Vehicle breaks down

Quadrant II

Unimportant phone calls

Others small problems Peer pressure

Interruptions

Quadrant IV

THE PROCRASTINATOR

THE YES MAN




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Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

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nt

Friend gets injured

Late for work

Project due today

Vehicle breaks down

Quadrant II


Others small problems

Peer pressure

Interruptions

Too much TV

Endless phone callsWork politics

Other time wasters

THE PROCRASTINATOR

THE YES MAN THE SLACKER




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Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

rta

nt

Friend gets injured

Late for work

Project due today

Vehicle breaks down

Paper due in a week

Exercise

Relaxation

Planning, Goal setting



Peer pressure

Interruptions

Too much TV

Endless phone calls

Work politics

Other time wasters

THE PROCRASTINATOR


THE PRIORITIZER


Time Management Matrix Quadrant I personality


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g Q p y

Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimporta

nt

Quadrant II

Quadrant III

Quadrant IV

Stress and anxiety

Burnout

Mediocre performance

THE PROCRASTINATOR

Time Management Matrix Quadrant III Personality


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g Q y

Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

rta

nt


Quadrant IV

THE YES MAN

Reputation of being a pleaserLack of discipline

Feeling victimized - like a doormat for

others to wipe their feet on

Shallow, broken relationships

Time Management Matrix Quadrant IV Personality


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Time Management Matrix Quadrant IV Personality

Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

rta

nt



Lack of responsibilityGuilt

Not successful in any job

THE SLACKER

Time Management Matrix Quadrant II Personality


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g y

Urgent Not urgent

Impo

rtant

Notimpo

rtan

t

Quadrant I

Quadrant II

Control of your life

Balance

Discipline

High performance

Few crisis

THE PRIORITIZER


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80% of the results flow from 20% ofthe activities

Pareto principle



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Urgent Not urgent

Important

Notimpo

rta

nt

Friend gets injured

Late for work

Project due today

Vehicle breaks down

Paper due in a week

Exercise

Relaxation

Planning, Goal setting



Peer pressure

Interruptions

Too much TV

Endless phone calls

Work politics

Other time wasters

THE PROCRASTINATOR


THE PRIORITIZER



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How can we be prioritizers

Shrink Quadrant 1 by procrastinating less

Say NO to quadrant 3 activities

Cut down on Quadrant 4 Slacker activities

Pick up a planner

Plan weekly Identify Big / Important tasks eg Self education,

time with friends, exercise 3 times this week etc etc

Block out time for these Big / Important tasks

Schedule everything else after scheduling the bigtasks

Adapt daily

We all need to become Quadrant II self


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We all need to become Quadrant II selfmanagers

Identify roles

Proactive faculty, colleague, friend,

son / daughter,

brother /sister

Individual

Select Goals in the next 1 year, I would improve myself as a human being, be more

positive, proactive and helpful to people. I must have more closerrelationships that what I have today

Detailed areas of Activity Introspect every day for 30 minutes on what I could have done well and what

I did well

Observe people on areas that they are better than me and get to know them,

Try to be more positive all the time introspect as to why I am not,

Proactively commit to time with friends every week, Take time out every week to help people etc etc

Daily Planning -

The weekly planner


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The weekly planner

M Y W E EK L Y P L A N

R o l e s Faculty, friend, Son / daughter,Individual

M o n d a y T u e sd a y W e d n e sd a yT h u r sd a y F rid a y S a tu r d a y S u n d a y

A M 5 . 0 0 - 6 . 0 0

6 . 0 0 - 7 . 0 0

7 . 0 0 - 8 . 0 0

8 . 0 0 - 9 . 0 0

9 . 0 0 - 1 0 . 0 0

1 0 . 0 0 - 1 1 . 0 0

1 1 . 0 0 - 1 2 . 0 0

P M 1 2 . 0 0 - 1 . 0 0

1 . 0 0 - 2 . 0 0

2 . 0 0 - 3 . 0 0

3 . 0 0 - 4 . 0 0

4 . 0 0 - 5 . 0 0

5 . 0 0 - 6 . 0 0

6 . 0 0 - 7 . 0 0

7 . 0 0 - 8 . 0 0

8 . 0 0 - 9 . 0 0

9 . 0 0 - 1 0 . 0 0


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The key is not to prioritize whatson your schedule

but to schedule your priorities

Lets revisit the question we asked


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Let s revisit the question we askedourselves early:

What are the top 4 activities that currentlytake up most of your time

What are the top 4 activities you would like tospend most of your time

Which quadrant do these answers fit in?

Where do we falter in habit 3 Putting


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Where do we falter in habit 3 Puttingfirst things first:

It is not our inability to prioritize?

It is our inability of overcome fear and peerpressure.


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Comfort zone and courage zone Comfort zone

Things I enjoy doing Easy to do Relaxation Freedom from risk Things I am accustomed to

Courage zone Things that I am afraid of Things that I have never tried Hard moments Things that are difficult Opportunity Bravery Higher duty

Never let your fears

make your decisions

Some of the things you could do in


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Some of the things you could do incourage zone

Make a new friend

Resist peer pressure

Break an old habit

Develop a new skill

Try out for a team Be yourself

Never let your fears make your decisions

Be strong in hard moments

Where do we falter in habit 3 Putting


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Where do we falter in habit 3 Puttingfirst things first:

It is not our inability to prioritize?

It is our inability of overcome fear and peerpressure.


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Overcoming peer pressureSaying NO when all your friends are saying YES needs raw courage

To overcome peer pressure, youve got to care more about what thinkof you that what your peers think of you

Peer pressure is hard to resist because you are dying to belong

Not all peer pressure is bad

How do you overcome Peer pressure

Build self confidence and self respect build it step by step, makepromises to yourself and keep it, help someone in need, develop atalent, forge your own path

Write a mission statement and set goals


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What can I do today to start this Habit

Set a goal to use a Planner for one montheveryday

Identify your biggest time waster and work toreduce it in the next one week

Think of something that you haveprocrastinated for long block time this week inyour planned to get it done

Say no to something that you believe is not yourpriority for the day today

Identify the people who have the most influenceon you ask yourself Am I doing what I want todo or what they want me to do


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Being ProactiveBegin with the end in mind

Managing time


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How will the success habits help you

Get control of your life

Make smarter decisions

Improve your relationships with your friends

Get along better with society

Define your values what matters more toyou

Get more done in less time

Find balance between work, family, friendsand everything else


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The Seven habitshe Seven habits 1. Be proactive Take responsibility for your life

2. Begin with the end in mind Define your missionand goals in life

3. Put first things first prioritize, and do the mostimportant things in life

4. Think Win Win have an everyone can winattitude

5. Seek first to understand and then to beunderstood Listen to people sincerely

6. Synergise Work together to achieve more

7. Sharpen the Saw Renew yourself regularly


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What is success? Success is the continuous

journey towardsachievement ofpredetermined worth-while goals - Tom Hopkins

The important thing is notwhere you were or whereyou are but where you wantto get.

Successful people do thingswhich unsuccessful people fail

to do Prioritise

Action

Start early

Follow-up

Encourage


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I would like to contribute to your success further Ifyou want, you can reach me for one on oneconsultations - please mail me at

[email protected]


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Thank you

success habits workshop_redesigned -fdp

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