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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

Stock photo courtesy of

Microsoft

Beacon 2015 Winter Edition

Gold Star Mothers and Family Day Our Gold Star Mothers and Family Day event offered families a time to

interact, face paint, and enjoy comforting food among friends. It was a

day to appreciate our families and make new memories. Renewing

friendships and making new friends while having an opportunity to share

stories of their Fallen Heroes.

Upcoming Events for

Surviving Families

Gold Star Pool Party

Date: January 31, 2015

Time: 10:30 AM – 12:30 PM

Location: Kimbro Pool at

McVeigh Sports & Fitness

Center

Cost: Free

Come enjoy some family water

fun. For more information call

Brook Carrion at 966-5047.

Dine & Dial - January 21

Topics for the call are taxes,

scholarships, and financial

strategies. The call will cover

two specific topics “Tax

preparation for the past and

tax planning for the future,”

and “Budgeting for college:

The scholarship process

(applying and processes”).

Call will be at 5:00 PM PST

to 6:15 PM PST.

Dial in Number:

1-626-677-3000

Access code:

7681905#

Laughter and

smiles were

shared as we

watched the

children bob for

apples and paint,

and repaint their

pumpkins.

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

Reoccurring Events

Winter Tea at SOS

Second Tuesday at 10:00AM

Come relax and chat with fellow

Survivors. Tea and coffee

provided.

Suicide Support Group

2nd

Wednesday of each month

4:00 PM – 5:00 PM

For Survivors whose spouses

were lost to suicide

For more info call:

253-967-6-5047

Active Duty Grief Support

Group

1st Tuesday of each month

11:45 AM – 12:45 PM

For Active Duty Military only

Feel free to bring lunch

For more info call:

253-966-5047

Fallen Heroes Memorial

Tree Approximately 50 Survivors

from various counties came

together at the JBLM SOS to

honor their Fallen Heroes and

place star on the Memorial

Tree. Over 500 stars with

personal messages were

placed on the Memorial Tree.

In addition to remembering

their loved ones, Families

shared stories, food, and

support.

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

December 11th

– 15th

Snowball Express 2014 Each December the non-profit organization

brings together families of post-9/11 fallen

military members for an all-expense paid trip to

create new memories and provide support.

Nearly 150 American Airlines pilots and flight

attendants donate their duty time to charter

flights for families to arrive from across the

United States to the final destination of

Dallas/Fort Worth.

The events encourage support and camaraderie

for these Survivors. They share their grief and

celebrate each day after suffering a terrible loss.

Each year Dallas/Fort Worth community cheers

the children and Families and honors the

sacrifice their husbands, wives, moms, and dads

have made for this great country.

Snowball Express 2014 Each December the non-profit organization

brings together families of post-9/11 fallen

military members for an all-expense paid trip to

create new memories and provide support.

Nearly 150 American Airlines pilots and flight

attendants donate their duty time to charter

flights for families to arrive from across the

United States to the final destination of

Dallas/Fort Worth.

The events encourage support and camaraderie

for these Survivors. They share their grief and

celebrate each day after suffering a terrible loss.

Each year Dallas/Fort Worth community cheers

the children and Families and honors the

sacrifice their husbands, wives, moms, and dads

have made for this great country.

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

Identity Theft Checklist for Victims

1. Contact one of the three credit reporting agencies. That agency will

notify the others and put a “fraud” alert on your credit report within 24

hours. This alerts creditors to call you for permission prior to any new

accounts being opened in your name. Additionally they will send you a free

copy of your credit report from all three credit reporting agencies. Here are

the numbers for all three credit bureaus:

a. Equifax: 800-525-6285

b. Experian: 888-397-3742

c. Trans Union: 800-680-7289

2. Contact creditors for any accounts that have been tampered with or opened without your

knowledge. Be sure to put your complaints in writing; keep a copy; and mail them certified mail.

Request that each creditor proved you and your investigating law enforcement agency with copies of the

documents showing fraudulent transaction. You may have to fight to get this documentation, but don’t

give up. You need these to help track down the person who committed fraud.

3. Alert you local police department and file a police report. Ensure you list all the accounts on which

fraud occurred and provide as much documentation as possible. Get a copy of the report. You will

need to send a copy to the creditors and the credit reporting agencies as proof of a crime.

4. Contact the Federal Trade Commission (FTC). You can call them at 1-877-ID-THEFT (1-877-438-

4338). The FTC monitors identity theft crimes looking for patterns. Fill out the Identity Theft Affidavit a

www.ftc.gov; print copies; and send copies to the creditors and credit reporting agencies.

5. Change all your account passwords. If an account does not have a password, add one. Avoid using

your mother’s maiden name or the last four digits of your Social Security number as a personal

identification number.

6. Notify the Office of the Inspector General at www.ssa.gov/oig/hotline/index.htm if your Social

Security Number has been fraudulently used. Ask for a copy of your Personal Earnings and Benefits

Statement and check for accuracy.

7. Change your driver’s license number if someone is using yours as an ID. Go to the Department of

Motor Vehicles to get a new number.

8. Contact your utility companies to prevent a con artist from using a utility bill as proof of residence

when applying for new cards.

“Sometimes the most ordinary things could be made

extraordinary, simply by doing them with the right people.”

~ Elizabeth Green

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

PLANNING PURCHASES – Quite often people ask about the specific time of year to

get great deals on items. Planning purchases could save you hundreds or even thousands

of dollars during the year. The following monthly list gives you a guide to plan the best

time to purchase items:

1. January – Major appliances such as washer and dryers, bicycles, calendars, carpet and flooring, furniture,

linens and bedding, office furniture, business suits, men’s shirts, video games, hot water heater, Christmas

wrapping paper, Christmas cards, lingerie, shoes, outdoor gear, digital cameras, bicycles and toys.

2. February – Bicycles, boats, home theaters, video games, art supplies, used cars, lamps, chocolate after the

15th, winter clothing, canned goods, and storm windows.

3. March – China, flatware, gardening tools, children’s shoes, ice skates, luggage, winter clothing, shoes,

frozen food (national frozen-food month) and ski equipment.

4. April – Women’s shoes, dresses, cookware, electronics, office furniture at the end of the month, snow

blower, television, vacuum cleaner, boots, used cars, car accessories, fabric, baking supplies, energy-efficient

bulbs, and hosiery.

5. May – Cookware, electronics, small kitchen appliances, mattresses and box springs, party supplies, vacuum

cleaners, bathrobes, luggage, outdoor furniture, area rugs, spring clothing, paint, summer sports equipment,

and tires.

6. June – Champagne, gym memberships, power tools, building materials, dairy products (National Dairy

Month), gardening tools, and men’s clothing.

7. July – Broadway tickets, gardening tools, household paint, computers, furniture, and business suits.

8. August – Computers, school supplies, swimsuits, dehumidifier, flip flops, lawn mowers, swing sets, car

batteries, disinfectants, hand sanitizers, cleaning wipes, sunscreen, insect repellent, sporting goods and

mufflers.

9. September – China, flatware, patio furniture, wine, cars (last year’s model), garden equipment, summer

clothing, lawn mowers, laptops, diabetes supplies (including glucose meters), school supplies, and lamps.

10. October – Gas grills, air conditioner, large home appliances, new car, jeans, women’s coats, fishing

equipment, summer sports equipment, shrubs, trees, spring bulbs, cookware, wine, fans, outdoor furniture,

and cars (last year’s model).

11. November – Cookware, gas grills, small kitchen appliances, recreational vehicles, blankets, boy’s coats,

shoes, home improvement supplies, men’s shirts, candy (leftover from Halloween), wedding dresses (Nov.

15 – Dec. 24), HDTV and home theatre equipment (Nov. 15 – Jan. 31), and fall clothing.

12. December – Champagne, cookware, tools, small household appliances, and televisions.

Financial Purchase Calendar

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

The Importance of Hope

By Alan D. Wolfelt, PhD (used with permission)

Excerpted from The Mourner’s Book of Hope: 30 Days of Inspiration

“Today… I open my heart’s hand to allow the touch of hope.” ~ Julia

Cameron

Someone you love has died. In your heart you have come to know your

deepest pain. Your grief has brought challenges that seem beyond your

own capacity to survive. Grief creates chaos, and your soul cries out.

You naturally experience a sense of helplessness and, at times, you feel

the depths of hopelessness. It all feels so incredibly overwhelming. And as you live in this painful place, you

come to learn that you must surrender to your grief, sit in your wound, and make space for your lost self.

If your experience is in any way like my own and those of the thousands of mourners I have had the honor to

walk with and learn from, you are feeling abandoned and alone right now. You may instinctively be questioning

the meaning and purpose of life. You recognize that so many things in your daily life have changed—your

plans, your dreams, your concerns, and your roles. You may discover yourself searching for a reason to go on

living in the face of this loss and asking countless “How?” and “Why” questions.

“How can this be happening?”

“How am I going to make it through this?”

“Why did this happen now, in this way?”

“Why am I feeling so lost?”

When we experience a loss, whether it is the death of someone loved, a divorce loss, the loss of a job, or a

significant change in health, loss reminds us of how little control we really have over some things about life and

living. Naturally, these kinds of losses (among many others) can leave us feeling incredibly powerless,

seemingly helpless, and deeply hopeless at times.

When we lose someone we love, it changes us. The person who died was a part of you and part of your life.

This death means you must mourn a loss not only outside yourself, but inside yourself as well. At times,

overwhelming sadness and loneliness may be constant companions to you on this grief journey. You may feel

that when this person died, part of you died with him or her. And now you are faced with finding some sense of

meaning at a time when you may be feeling empty and alone.

Your loneliness and emptiness are often present, even in the midst of family and friends. When others try to

help by saying, “I know just how you feel,” they usually do not. They cannot. They are not walking this walk

for you. Your pain, your questions, your doubts, your fears are unique. No one can know exactly how this feels

for you.

While your grief is unique, some of the questions you may be asking are universal. The fears, doubts, and

questions that come when we experience grief have been with us since the beginning of our awareness that loss

is part of the cycle of life. Loss truly is an integral part of life. You are asking questions that others before you

have raised. Questions that have been raised to God. Questions that have been asked about God. Like others

who have been where you are, you may be feeling distant from your God, perhaps even questioning the

existence of God. These kinds of questions have been preserved in time because they belong to and are asked by

most everyone who experiences the pain of loss.

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

So, like your fellow travelers on this grief journey, you are faced with sitting in the wound of your grief. When

you sit in the wound of your grief, you surrender to it in recognition that the only way to the other side of the

pain and hopelessness is through the pain and hopelessness. You acknowledge that you are willing to do the

work that mourning requires. Paradoxically, it is in befriending your wound that eventually you will restore

your life and reinvest in living.

Loss of Your Divine Spark and the Role of Hope in Your Healing

People in grief often come to see me on the sacred grounds of the Center for Loss and Life Transition. When

they begin their grief journey, they often start by expressing their sense of hopelessness by saying, “I feel so

hopeless,” or, “I am not sure I can go on living.” Like you, the losses that have touched their lives have

naturally muted, if not extinguished, their divine spark. Their divine spark is that internal energy that gives

meaning and purpose to life. Your divine spark or life force is the keeper of

your mind, your body, and your soul.

I discovered some time ago that a central part of my helping role is to gently

and quietly bring hope to those in grief. Hope that encourages them to discover

a renewed divine spark and a desire to reenter life with meaning and purpose.

Each and every one of us as humans has a divine spark. We are each the

keeper of our own spark or life force. My personal life losses and my role as a

caregiver to others have taught me that hope is the vital ingredient that helps

us reignite our divine spark after loss breaks our hearts and touches our souls.

My Prayer For You

May you continue to discover hope—an expectation of a good that is yet to be.

May you continue to find new ways to renew your divine spark and to believe that meaning, purpose, and love

will come back into your life. No, you did not go in search of this loss. But it has come to you, and you have

discovered the importance of sitting in your wound on the pathway to your healing. If you give up, the essence

of who you are will die or be muted for the rest of your life. Hope can and will keep this from happening.

May you never give up and may you consciously choose life! May you turn your face to the radiance of joy

every day. May you live in the continued awareness that you are being cradled in love by a caring presence that

never deserts you. May you keep your heart open wide and receptive to what life brings you, both happy and

sad. And may you walk a pathway to living your life fully and on purpose until you die.

Blessings to you as you befriend hope and choose to celebrate life. May your divine spark shine brightly as you

share your gifts and your love with the universe.

"Hope is a beautiful thing. It gives us peace and strength, and keeps us going when all seems lost. Accepting what you cannot change doesn't mean you have given up on hope. It just means

you have to focus your hope on more humanly tangible and attainable goals."

Julie Donner Andersen, What My Widowed Husband Has Taught Me

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Survivor Outreach Services - Beacon Winter 2015

WA Survivor

Outreach Services

(SOS) JBLM

AFCS Annex

Bldg. 2166, Liggett Ave &

12th S. St.

Support Coordinator,

Brook Carrion

253-966-5047

Financial Counselor,

Ryki Carlson

253-967-3672

JBLM

Casualty Assistance

Office

Waller Hall

Bldg. 2140, Liggett Ave.

253-966-5890

JBLM

Retirement Services

Office

Waller Hall

Bldg. 2140, Liggett Ave.

253-966-5881

Tricare Beneficiary

Services

Pam Eisfeldt at

253-973-1814

Veterans Affairs

Representative

Obra Kent at

206-604-4045

JBLM

Tax Center

CPT Meghan McClincy

253-967-2463

Meghan.a.mcclincy.mil@

mail.mil

www.facebook.com/sos

wastate

Comparison Chart for Surviving Spouses with both DEA and Fry Scholarship Eligibility

DEA Fry Scholarship

Benefit

Payments

Monthly amount paid directly to

the student. The current monthly

payment for full-time training is

$1,018.

Tuition & Fee Payment (Paid to

School) - Full in-state tuition costs

covered for training pursued at public

institutions. Up to $20,035.02 per year

at private institutions

Books and Supplies Stipend (Paid to

Student) - Up to $1,000 a year for

books and supplies. Paid to the student

proportionately for each term.

Monthly Housing Allowance (Paid

to Student) - Stipend based on local

BAH for E-5 with dependents and paid

monthly. Online students receive half

of the BAH national average

Duration of

Benefits

Surviving Spouses of those who

died in the line of duty may use

benefits for up to 20 years from

the Servicemember's date of

death.

15 years from the Servicemember's

date of death

Maximum

Months of

Benefits

45 months 36 months

Concurrent

Receipt of DIC

and Education

Benefit for

Spouse

Yes Yes

Programs

Covered

College, Business, Technical,

or Vocational Programs

Certification Tests

Apprenticeship/On-the-Job

Training

Tutorial Assistance

Work-study

College, Business, Technical, or

Vocational Programs

Certification Tests

Apprenticeship/On-the-Job

Training

Vocational flight training

Tutorial Assistance

Work-study