Child Welfare Information GatewayChildren’s Bureau/ACYF/ACF/HHS1250 Maryland Avenue, SWEighth FloorWashington, DC 20024800.394.3366Email: info@childwelfare.govhttps://www.childwelfare.gov

FACTSHEET FOR FAMILIES

December 2013

ParentingaChildWhoHasExperiencedAbuseorNeglect

What’s Inside:

• WhatshouldIknowaboutmychild?

• Whatischildabuseandneglect?

• Whataretheeffectsofabuseandneglect?

• HowcanIhelpmychildheal?

• WherecanIfindsupport?

• Resources

Introduction

Childrenwhohavebeenabusedorneglectedneedsafeandnurturingrelationshipsthataddresstheeffectsofchildmaltreatment.Ifyouareparentingachildwhohasbeenabusedorneglected,youmighthavequestionsaboutyourchild’sexperiencesandtheeffectsofthoseexperiences.Thisfactsheetisintendedtohelpparents(birth,

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foster,andadoptive)andothercaregiversbetterunderstandthechallengesofcaringforachildwhohasexperiencedmaltreatmentandlearnabouttheresourcesavailableforsupport.(Insomecases,theterm“birth”parentisusedtodistinguishparentswithchildreninvolvedwithchildwelfarefromkinorfosteroradoptiveparents.)

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What Should I Know About My Child?

Learningaboutyourchild’suniquehistoryisanimportantfirststepforallparentsandcaregiversinprovidingahealingenvironmentforchildrenwhohaveexperiencedabuseorneglect.Trytoconsiderthechild’sbackgroundandhistoryfromthechild’spointofview.Whathashappenedinthechild’slife—bothgoodandbad—andhowmightthisimpactthechild’sbehaviorandfamilyadjustment?Thishistoryisoneofmanyvariablesthatwillaffecthowyoucanhelpyourchildhealandthrive.Forinstance,yourhistorywiththechildandotherfactorsspecifictothemaltreatment(e.g.,typeofabuseorneglect),specifictothechild(e.g.,age,resilience),andspecifictoyou(e.g.,parentingexperience)allcomeintoplay.

Parentswhoreunitewithachildwhowasinout-of-homecare,relativesthatprovidecareforthechildofafamilymember,andfosterandadoptiveparentsmayconfrontdifferentchallengeswhenraisingachildwhohasexperiencedmaltreatment.Theamountandtypesofinformationyouareabletoobtainaboutyourchild’shistorymayalsodependonthetypeofparent-childrelationship.

For birth parents.Manychildrenwhoseparentsarereportedforchildmaltreatmentarenotremovedfromtheirhomes;instead,thefamilyreceivesin-homeservices.Forchildrenwhodoenterfostercare,theprimarygoalisusuallyfamilyreunification,andthemajorityofchildrenwhoenterfostercareduetochildabuseorneglecteventuallyreturnhome(U.S.DepartmentofHealthandHumanServices,2012).Inbothcases,thegoalistoreconnectandbuildstrongparent-childrelationshipsinasafehomeenvironmentthatpromoteschildandfamilywell-being.Whilebirthparentsmayknowjustaboutallthereistoknowabouttheirchild’sbackground,theymayneedtolearnmoreaboutanyfostercareorkinshipcareexperiencesthattheirchildhashad,andtheymayneedtolearnmoreaboutthepossibleimpactofabuseorneglectontheirchild.Youmaywishtotalkwithyoursocialworkeraboutyourchild’shistory,andsharingyourconcernswillhelpyoursocialworkerhelpyouandyourfamily,includinghelpseekingprofessionalmentalhealthservices.Informationabouttherapyandsupportgroupsisprovidedlaterinthisfactsheet.

For kinship caregivers.Somechildrenwhohavebeenabusedorneglectedenterformalorinformalkinshipcarewithagrandparent,aunt,orotherrelative.Kinshipcaregiversmaybecomeresponsibleforachildunexpectedlyormayconfrontissuesthatdidn’texistwhentheyraisedtheirownchildren.Kinshipcaregiversmayormaynothaveagoodhistoryoftheirchild’sbackgroundandanymaltreatmentexperiences.Theymaynothavereceivedtraininginprovidingout-of-homecareandmayneedtobebroughtuptodateonwhathashappenedtothechild,aswellasanypossibleimpactofabuseorneglect.

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For foster and adoptive parents.Fosterandadoptiveparentsmaynotbeawareoftheirchild’spasttraumasortheextentoftheabuseorneglect.Althoughtheyhavereceivedtrainingtopreparethemtocareforthechild,theymaynotbecompletelyreadyfortheuniquesituationofaparticularchild.Whilechildwelfareagenciesarerequiredtoprovideallavailableinformationaboutachild,someinformationmaynotbeobtainable,andsomechildrenmaynotfeelcomfortabledisclosingpastabuseorneglect.

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sfactsheetObtainingBackgroundInformationonYourProspectiveAdoptedChildaddressesthequestionsprospectiveadoptiveparentsshouldasktheiradoptionagency,reasonssomeinformationmaynotbeavailable,andwheretofindmoreinformation:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f_background.cfm

Educatingyourselfaboutyourchild’shistoryandaboutchildabuseandneglectandtheservicesavailableforhelpwillbetterprepareyouandyourfamilytofacethechallengesaheadandcontinuedowntheroadtowardhealing.

What Is Child Abuse and Neglect?

Recognizingthesignsofabuseandneglectisthefirststeptowardgettinghelpforyourchildandyourfamily.Physical,emotional,andsexualabuseandneglecthavevaryingsymptoms,someofwhicharepresentedbelow.Thepresenceofoneormoreofthesesignsdoesnotprovethatmaltreatmenthasoccurred,butcaregiverswhoareawareoftheseindicatorsarebetterequippedtoseekappropriateservices.

WhilethereisaFederaldefinitionforabuseandneglect,Statesalsohavespecificlawsaddressingthedefinitionsandconsequences.Asof2010,theFederalChildAbusePreventionandTreatmentAct(CAPTA)defineschildabuseandneglectas“Anyrecentactorfailuretoactonthepartofaparentorcaretakerwhichresultsindeath,seriousphysicaloremotionalharm,sexualabuseorexploitation;oranactorfailuretoactwhichpresentsanimminentriskofseriousharm.”

Childmaltreatmentfallsintoanumberofcategories:

• Physicalabusereferstoanonaccidentalphysicalinjury(e.g.,hitting,kicking,burning,etc.)byaparentorothercaregiverintheparentingrole.

• Neglectisthefailureoftheparentorcaregivertoprovideforthechild’sbasicneeds—food,shelter,supervision,medicalcare,andemotionalnurturing.

• Sexualabusereferstonotonlyforcingorcoercingachildtoengageinsexualactivitybutalsotoexploitationthroughpornography.

• Emotionalabuseisusuallyapatternofbehaviorthathurtsachild’semotionaldevelopment(e.g.,constantcriticism,threats,withholdinglove,etc.).

Somesignsofphysicalabuseinachild:

• Hasunexplainedburns,bites,bruises,brokenbones,orblackeyes

• Shrinksattheapproachofadults

• Reportsinjurybyaparentoranotheradultcaregiver

• Abusesanimalsorpets

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Somesignsofneglect:

• Lacksneededmedicalordentalcare,immunizations,orglasses

• Abusesalcoholorotherdrugs

Somesignsofsexualabuse:

• Reportsnightmaresorbedwetting

• Demonstratesbizarre,sophisticated,orunusualsexualknowledgeorbehavior

• Attachesveryquicklytostrangersornewadultsintheirenvironment

Somesignsofemotionalabuse:

• Showsextremesinbehavior,suchasoverlycompliantordemandingbehavior,extremepassivity,oraggression

• Showseitherinappropriatelygrown-upbehavior(parentingotherchildren,forexample)orinappropriatelychildishbehavior(frequentlyrockingorhead-banging,forexample)

• Isdelayedinphysicaloremotionaldevelopment

• Hasattemptedsuicide

• Reportsalackofattachmenttotheparent

What Is Trauma?Traumaisanyeventthatthreatenssomeone’swell-beingorthewell-beingofalovedone.Itcantakemanyforms,fromexperiencingmaltreatmenttowitnessingdomesticviolenceorsurvivinganaturaldisaster.Childrenandyouth’sresponsetotraumavaries;somemaybereluctanttotrust,somemayactout,andsomemaybewithdrawn.Inextremecases,

childrenmaydevelopposttraumaticstresssyndrome,depression,orothermentalhealthconditions.Withhelp,childrenwhoexperiencetraumacancope,heal,andeventhrive.Thisiscalled“resilience,”andparentsandcaregiversplayanimportantroleinthehealingprocess.

Somesignsthatyourchildhasexperiencedtraumainclude:

• Nightterrorsorafearofgoingtosleep

• Bedwettingorotherissueswithbodilyfunctioncontrol

• Anxiety,confusion,agitation,tempertantrums,orotheremotionalcontrolissues

• Self-mutilation,purging,orvomiting(TheFosterCareandAdoptionResourceCenter,2012)

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sfactsheetWhatIsChildAbuseandNeglect?RecognizingtheSignsandSymptomsoffersinformationabouthowtospotabuseandneglectandprovidesalistofresources:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/whatiscan.cfm

TheNationalChildTraumaticStressNetwork’swebsectiononWhatIsChildTraumaticStress?http://www.nctsn.org/resources/audiences/parents-caregivers/what-is-cts

RESOURCES ON CHILD ABUSE AND NEGLECT AND TRAUMA

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What Are the Effects of Child Abuse and Neglect?

Researchshowsthatabuseandneglectcanaffectachild’sabilitytolearn,formrelationships,andproblemsolve,andchildrenwhohaveexperiencedmaltreatmentareatriskformanyillnessesandpoorhealthlaterinlife.Knowinghowmaltreatmentmayhaveaffectedyourchildmayhelpyourecognizetheeffectsofabuseorneglectandseektheappropriateassessmentsandhelp.

Effects on Child DevelopmentAgreatdealofresearchinrecentyearshasexaminedchildandadolescentbraindevelopment.Wenowknowthatthewaythebraindevelopscanchangewhenachildhasexperiencedstressfromsevereorongoingabuseorneglect(CenterfortheDevelopingChild,n.d.).Maltreatmentcandelayoraffectthewaysachildisabletocontrolhisorheremotions,seerightfromwrong,identifyconsequencesofactions,andlearnfrommistakes.

Mostchildrenexperiencedevelopmentalmilestonesalongthesamegeneraltimelines.Typically,childrenfrombirthto5acquiretheabilitytosoothethemselveswhentheyarestressed;childrenages6–7havemorecontrolovertheiremotionsandbehaviors;andadolescentsages11–14mighthavefrequentmoodswings,buttheylearntoacceptdisappointmentsandovercomefailures.Abuseorneglectcanimpairthishealthydevelopment.Somecausesforconcernaboutdevelopmentaldelaysinclude:

• Achildagesbirth–5whoexhibitsaninabilitytorelaxormanagestress

• Achildages6–7whoisfrequentlysad,worried,afraid,orwithdrawn

• Achildages11–14whohasstrongnegativethoughtsabouthimorherself,orhasanextremeneedforapprovalandsocialsupport

It’simportanttorememberthatalthoughcrucialbraindevelopmentoccursduringthefirst3yearsoflife,ourbrainscontinuetodevelopintoadulthood.Thebraindevelopmentthattakesplaceatage2isquitedifferentfromthedevelopmentthathappensatage14.Infact,thebrainexperiencesagrowthspurtrightbeforepubertythataffectsapreteen’sabilitytoplan,reason,andcontrolimpulsesandemotions.

Itisnormalforteenagerstoactimpulsivelyandtakerisks,becausethepartoftheirbrainthatregulatesimpulsecontrol—thefrontallobe—isnotfullymatured.Adolescentswhohaveexperiencedabuse,neglect,orothertrauma,however,maybemoreimpulsive.Teenswhohavebeenmaltreatedmay:

• Struggleacademicallyandsocially

• Havedifficultywithtasksrequiringahigherlevelofthinking

• Experimentwithdrugsorcriminalactivity

Acaringadultwhoprovideshealthyguidancetoyouthcanoffertheopportunityforthemtomodelappropriatebehaviorsanddeveloptheskillsnecessaryforhealthyadultrelationships.

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Effects on Health Whilechildabuseandneglectcanleavephysicalscars,therealsocanbeanumberofunderlying,lessvisibleeffects.Severalstudieshavedemonstratedalinkbetweennegativeexperiencesduringchildhoodandpooradulthealthoutcomesthatcanleadtoearlydeath,including(Saul,2012;Felitti&Anda,2009):

• Heart,lung,andliverdiseases

• Highbloodpressure,diabetes,asthma,andobesity

• Alcoholandotherdrugabuse

• Sexuallytransmitteddiseases

Social, Psychological, and Behavioral Effects Childrenandyouthwhohaveexperiencedabuseorneglectmayalsoexperienceoneormoreofthefollowingpsychologicalandbehavioraleffects:

• Borderlinepersonalitydisorder,depression,and/oranxiety

• Attachmentissuesoraffectionatebehaviorswithunknown/little-knownpeople

• Inappropriatemodelingofadultbehavior,aggression,andotherantisocialtraits

• Juveniledelinquencyoradultcriminality

• Futureabusivebehaviorsuchasinterpersonalviolenceordomesticabuse

Formoreinformationonresearchonadversechildhoodexperiences,seethewebsitefortheU.S.CentersforDiseaseControlandPrevention:http://www.cdc.gov/ace/index.htm

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sissuebriefUnderstandingtheEffectsofMaltreatmentonBrainDevelopment:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/issue_briefs/brain_development/index.cfm

InformationGateway’sLong-TermConsequencesofChildAbuseandNeglect:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/long_term_consequences.cfm

ZEROTOTHREE’sseriesofhandoutswithinformationaboutsupportinghealthybraindevelopmentinthefirst3yearsoflife:http://www.zerotothree.org/child-development/brain-development/healthy-minds.html

TheCentersforDiseaseControlandPrevention’sNationalCenteronBirthDefectsandDevelopmentalDisabilitieswithresourcesonchilddevelopment,developmentalmilestones,developmentaldisabilities,andparentingtips:http://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/index.html

RESOURCES ON THE EFFECTS OF CHILD ABUSE AND NEGLECT

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How Can I Help My Child Heal?

Knowingthepossibleeffectsofchildabuseandneglectisafirststep.Thissectionexploressomestrategiesforhelpingyourchildoryouthovercomethesetraumas,includingsometechniquesfordisciplinethatcanhelppreventfutureabuseorretraumatization.

Building Resilience and Promoting Protective FactorsResilienceisachildoryouth’sabilitytocope,andeventhrive,followinganegativeexperience.Thisisnotaninherenttraitbutsomethingthathastobedevelopedandnurtured.

Someofthewaysyoucanhelpyourchildbuildresilienceinclude:

• Build strong connectionswithfriendsandfamilythatcansupportchildrenduringchallengesandteachthemtothinkaboutandconsiderotherpeople’sfeelings.

• Allow children to feel their feelings.Teachthemhowtodescribethosefeelings,andcommendthemforexpressingfeelingsofhurtorsadnesswithoutactingout.

• Be consistent.Ifyousayyou’llbethere,bethere.Ifyousayyou’lllistentoconcerns,listen.Thiswillhelptoteachyourchildthatpeoplecanbetrusted.

• Be patient.Children’sreactionstotraumavaryaswidelyasthetypesof

traumaonecanexperience.Thereisn’taone-size-fits-allsolution.

• Express your support.Expressloveandsupportforyourchildverballyandphysically.Expressyourlovethroughwords,notes,andhugs.

• Teach your child the importance of healthy behaviors.Haveopenandhonesttalksaboutthedangersofdrugsandalcohol,smoking,andsexualpromiscuity.Teachyourchildtheimportanceofeatingproperlyandexercising.

Experiencingabuseorneglectdoesn’tmeanyourchildwilldeveloppoorhealthornegativewell-beingoutcomes.Whencaregiversandparentsfosterprotectivefactors—circumstancesinfamiliesandcommunitiesthatincreasethehealthandwell-beingofchildrenandfamilies—itmaylessenthenegativeeffectsofmaltreatment(Pizzolongo&Hunter,2011).Astrongandsecureemotionalbondbetweenchildrenandtheircaregiversiscriticalforchildren’sphysical,social,andemotionaldevelopment,includingtheirabilitytoformtrustingrelationships,exhibitpositivebehaviors,andhealfrompasttraumas.

Thehealingprocessisnotalwaysaclear,straightpath,andittakestime.Somethingsyoucandotohelpyourchildhealinclude:

• Addressthechild’sphysicalsafetyfirstbylettinghimorherknowthatnoonewillphysicallylashout.Thiswillhelpthechildcreatefeelingsoftrustandopenuptopsychologicalandemotionalhealing.

• Addressthepastasthepast.Helpthechildidentifyelementsofhisorhercurrentlifethataredifferentfromthe

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past.Usethisasanopportunitytodiscussnewboundariesandexpectationstoencouragefeelingsofbelongingandattachment(TheFosterCareandAdoptionResourceCenter,2012).

Building a Strong Relationship With Your Child Achild’searliestrelationshipsaresomeofthemostimportant.Attachmentisthesenseofsecurityandsafetyachildfeelswithcaregiversandisimportantforyourchild’sphysical,emotional,mental,andpsychologicaldevelopment.Itisformedthroughconsistent,positiveaffectionandemotionalinteractions.Theissuesandchallengesmostcaregiversfacewithchildrenwhohaveexperiencedmaltreatmentistheresultofabreakinattachmentduringthefirst3yearsoflife(Keck&Kupecky,2002).

Tofosterasecurerelationshipwithachild:

• Be available.Provideconsistentsupporttobuildfeelingsoftrustandsafety.

• Offer comfort.Supportthechildwhenheorsheisupset,modelingappropriatedisplaysofaffectionandbuildingthechild’sself-esteem.

• Be respectful.Letyourchildknowthatyouwillkeephimorhersafe(CenterfortheSocialandEmotionalFoundationsforEarlyLearning,2011).

RESOURCES FOR BUILDING RESILIENCE AND PROMOTING PROTECTIVE FACTORS

The2013ResourceGuide,PreventingChildMaltreatmentandPromotingWell-Being,offersparenttipsheetsandmoreinformationaboutprotectivefactors:https://www.childwelfare.gov/preventing/preventionmonth/guide2013/

TheAmericanPsychologicalAssociation’s(APA’s)guideResilienceGuideforParentsandTeachers:http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/resilience.aspx

TheAPA’sParentingAfterTrauma:UnderstandingYourChild’sNeeds:AGuideforFosterandAdoptiveParents:http://www.aap.org/en-us/advocacy-and-policy/aap-health-initiatives/healthy-foster-care-america/Documents/FamilyHandout.pdf

TheNationalChildTraumaticStressNetworkoffersatrainingcurriculum,CaringforChildrenWhoHaveExperiencedTrauma:AWorkshopforResourceParents:http://www.nctsn.org/products/caring-for-children-who-have-experienced-trauma

What Is the Difference Between Child Abuse and Child Discipline?Itisnormalforchildrentoactoutandchallengeaparentorcaregiver’sauthority.Toddlersthrowtantrums.Teenagersargue.Thewaysinwhichparentsguideachildanddisciplinepoorbehavioriscriticaltoshapingmorepositivebehavior.Children

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learncontrolandself-disciplinefromtheircaregivers,anddisciplineshouldneverbeharmfultoachild.Infact,severepunishmentwon’taccomplishyourgoalsandcandomoreharmthangood.Forchildrenwhohaveexperiencedabuseorneglect,aggressivepunishmentcouldelicitmemoriesofpasttraumaorcauseretraumatization.

Disciplineandpunishment,whileoftenusedinterchangeably,areactuallyquitedifferent.

• Disciplineistheactofteachingchildrenthedifferencebetweenacceptableandunacceptablebehavior.Thiscanbeaccomplishedbytalkingtochildrenaboutmisbehaviorandrequiringchildrentotakeresponsibilityforitsconsequences,likebeingresponsibleforcleaningupamessorapologizingforhurtingsomeone’sfeelings.Youalsocanguideyourchildbypositivelyreinforcingandencouragingtheirgoodbehaviorsandnotjustcorrectingtheirpoorbehaviors.

• Punishmentisanapproachtodisciplinethatcanbephysical—aslaponthehand—orpsychological—thelossofTVtime,orotherfreedoms.(CenterforEarlyEducationandDevelopment,n.d.).

Amisbehavingchildcanbefrustrating,butusingphysicalforcetoteachalessonorrelieveaggravationisalwayswrong.Factorslikesleepanddietcancausetensionstorise.Ifyourchildisactingoutandyoufeeloverwhelmed,considerwhetherheorsheishungry,tired,orexpressingareactiontoanunderlyingissuelikefearoranxiety.

Practical Discipline Tips or TechniquesThefollowingtipsmayhelpyousafelydisciplineyourchild:

• Role modeling:Childrenlearnmoreaboutbehaviorbywatchingadultsthaninanyotherway.Beapositiveexampleforexpressingemotionsanddealingwithfrustration.Staycalminsteadofyelling.

• Encouragement:Letchildrenknowwhattheyaredoingrightaswellaspointingoutthemistakestheymake.

• Rules:Setroutinesforbedtimes,meals,andchores.Knowingwhatwillhappennextcanbeveryimportanttoachildwhoselifeoncefeltchaotic.

• Set limits:Beveryclearaboutyourlimits.

• Attention-ignore:Ignoringbehaviorissimplypretendingthatthebehaviorisnotoccurring.Theparentdoesnotlookat,talkto,orrespondtothechilduntiltheinappropriatebehaviorends.Whenachildbreaksarule,staycalmanddowhatisfair.Sometimes,yourchildcanhelpyoudecidewhatisfairtodowhenaruleisbroken.

• Never hit or shake a child: Hittingisnotausefuldisciplinetoolforyourchildren.Besidesthepotentialphysicalabuseandinjury,hittingandotherphysicalpunishmentsarenoteffectivewaystodiscipline.Theyteachchildrenthatitisacceptabletohurtpeople,andtheymakechildrenmuchtooangrytobesorryforwhatthey’vedone.

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• Gear the discipline to the child’s developmental stage:Don’texpectachildofanyagetoperformsomethingheorsheisnotreadyfor.Allowyourchildtolearnathisorherownpace.Breaktasksdownintosmall,manageablesteps,sothatheorshefeelsasenseofsuccessandaccomplishment.

RESOURCES ON DISCIPLINE

TheKempeCenterforthePreventionandTreatmentofChildAbuseandNeglectoffershelpfulinformationforcaregiversondisciplineandtipsfordealingwithmisbehavior:http://www.kempe.org/index.php?s=10394&item=3980

TheannualPreventionResourceGuidesupportsserviceprovidersintheirworkwithparents,caregivers,andtheirchildrentostrengthenfamiliesandpreventchildabuseandneglect.Whilethisresourcewaswrittenforchildwelfareprofessionals,itincludeshelpfultipsheetsforparentsandcaregivers,like“DealingWithTemperTantrums,”whichaddressanumberofparentingissues.ThefreeguideandtipsheetsareavailableonChildWelfareInformationGateway’swebsite:https://www.childwelfare.gov/preventing/preventionmonth/guide2013/

Formoreinformation,visitChildWelfareInformationGateway’sDisciplineVersusAbusewebsection:https://www.childwelfare.gov/can/defining/disc_abuse.cfm#discipline

Where Can I Find Support?

Recoveringfromchildmaltreatmentisajourneythataffectstheentirefamily,andparentsandcaregiversneedsupport,too.Learningasmuchasyoucanaboutchildmaltreatmentandbolsteringyourparentingskillscangoalongwayinpromotingyourchild’swell-beingandbuildingahealthyfamily.

Parent Education and Training Parenteducationprogramsaregearedtowardreinforcingyourparentingskillsandteachingyounewstrategies.Theyfosterparentleadershipandempoweryoutoshapeyourfamilyandadvocatefortheirneeds.

Thesesupportprogramsandtrainingprogramsnotonlyofferyoustrategiesfortacklingdifficultsituationsandenhancingyourproblem-solvingskills,theymayalsohelpreducechildren’smisbehaviors.Parenteducationprogramscanbeonline,in-person,involveone-to-oneinstruction,ortakeplaceinagroupsetting.Whetheryoupreferacoursewithdirectinstruction,videos,orinanotherformat,successfulprogramswill:

• Promotepositivefamilyinteraction

• Involvefathers

• Useinteractivetrainingtechniques

• Offeropportunitiestopracticenewskills

• Teachemotionalcommunicationskills

• Encouragepeersupport

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RESOURCES ON PARENT EDUCATION

ThewebsitefortheFRIENDSNationalResourceCenterforCommunity-BasedChildAbusePrevention,aserviceoftheChildren’sBureau,hasseveralresourcesforparents:http://friendsnrc.org/cbcap-priority-areas/parent-leadership-and-involvement

CircleofParents®offersparent-ledself-helpgroupswhereanyoneinaparentingrolecanopenlydiscussthesuccessesandchallengesofraisingchildren:http://www.circleofparents.org/about_us/index.html

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sissuebriefParentEducationtoStrengthenFamiliesandReducetheRiskofMaltreatmentprovidesrecentresearchonsuccessfulparenteducationandhighlightsanumberofprograms:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/issue_briefs/parented/

Therapy or Support Groups Dealingwiththeeffectsofmaltreatmentcanbechallenging,andyouandyourfamilymaywishtoseekprofessionalhelp.Therapy,counseling,andsupportgroupscanprovidechildrenandcaregiverswiththeskillsnecessarytobuildhealthyrelationships,overcomepasttrauma,andpreventreoccurringorfuturetrauma.

Takeyourtimewhensearchingforamentalhealthprofessionaltoensureyoufindtherightfit.Ifyouandyourfamilyarereceivingchildwelfareservices(discussedlaterinthis

factsheet),youragencyorcaseworkermayprovideyouwithareferraltoatherapist.Ifyouareselectingatherapistonyourown,youcancallprospectivetherapistsorscheduleaninitialinterviewtogatherbasicinformation.Sometherapistswillevenofferaninitialbriefconsultationthatisfreeofcharge.It’simportantthattheprofessionalsyouchoosetoworkwitharespecificallytrainedtoeffectivelyaddresstheuniqueneedsofyourfamily—asmentionedearlier,theissuesthataffectparentsdifferfromthoseaffectingkinshipcaregivers,whichdifferstillfromissuesfacedbyadoptiveorfosterfamilies.Somethingstokeepinmindinclude:

• Yourtherapistsshouldbeknowledgeableabouttheimpactoftraumaonchildrenandfamilies.

• Yourtherapistsshouldallowandencourageyourparticipationintreatment.

• Youshouldbewaryoftherapiesthatrestrainachildorintrudeonhisorherphysicalspace,aschildrenwhohavebeenmaltreatedneedtodevelopclearboundariestofeelsafeandpreventretraumatization.

Justliketherearedifferenttypesofparenteducationprograms,therearedifferentapproachestotherapy.Fromgrouporfamilytherapytoindividualpsychotherapyorcognitivetherapy,it’simportantthatthetypeoftreatmentyouseekfitstheneedsofyourfamily.Onetypeoftherapyproveneffectiveforabusedchildrenbetweentheagesof2and8isparent-childinteractiontherapy.Inthisapproach,therapistscoachparentswhiletheyinteractwiththeirchildren,teachingparentsstrategiesforpromotingpositivebehaviors.

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AresourcethatratestheeffectivenessoftreatmentinterventionsforspecificpopulationsofchildrenandfamiliesistheNationalRegistryofEvidence-BasedProgramsandPractices:http://nrepp.samhsa.gov

RESOURCES ON THERAPY AND SUPPORT GROUPS

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sissuebriefParent-ChildInteractionTherapyWithAt-RiskFamilies:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f_interactbulletin/

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sfactsheetSelectingandWorkingWithaTherapistSkilledinAdoptionoffersinformationonthedifferentapproachestotherapy,treatmentsettings,andtipsforfindingtherighttherapistforadoptivefamilies,butmanyofthetipsareapplicabletootherfamilies,too:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f_therapist.cfm

TofindsupportgroupsandotherresourcesinyourState,visittheNationalFosterCare&AdoptionDirectory:https://www.childwelfare.gov/nfcad/

Child Welfare Services Thechildwelfaresystemofferssupporttopreventchildabuseorneglectandprovidesservicestofamiliesthatneedhelpprotectingandcaringfortheirchildren.Agencieswillarrangeforchildrentolivewithkinorwithfosterfamilieswhentheyarenotsafe

athome.Whenformalassessmentisnotwarranted,familiesoftencanbenefitfromservicestopreventfuturereportsofabuseorneglect.

Sometimes,afamilymightbenefitfromrespiteservices,counseling,orotherhelpforwhichachildwelfareagencymightprovideareferral.

• Prevention services,likeparenteducationprograms,arethosethataimtoreducetheriskofchildabuseandneglectorthereoccurrenceofmaltreatment.

• Family preservation servicesareshort-termservicesforfamiliesincrisisthatareintendedtokeepfamiliessafelytogetherintheirownhome.

• Postadoption servicescanhelpchildrenandfamiliesdealingwitharangeofissuesafteranadoptionisfinalized,suchaslossorgrief,birthfamilyconnections,adjustingtofamilydynamics,andmore.

Sometimes,parentsandcaregiversjustneedabreak.Respitecareisjustoneofthefamilysupportservicesthatcanprovidereliefandsupporttofamiliesincrisis.Thereisavarietyofrespiteservices,andfindingonethatfitsyourfamily’sneedsiskey.TheARCHNationalRespiteNetworkandResourceCenteroffersanationalrespitelocatortohelpyoufindservicesinyourState:http://archrespite.org/respitelocator

Parenting a Child Who Has Experienced Abuse or Neglect

13This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. Available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/parenting_CAN.cfm

https://www.childwelfare.gov

RESOURCES ON CHILD WELFARE SERVICES

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sfactsheetHowtheChildWelfareSystemWorksprovidesabriefoverviewofthechildwelfaresystemanditsfunctions:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/cpswork.cfm

ChildWelfareInformationGateway’sfactsheetforfamiliesFindingandUsingPostadoptionServices:https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f_postadoption.cfm

Making Your Community Safer

Helpingchildrenandfamilieshealfrommaltreatment,orpreventabusefromhappeninginthefirstplace,isnotthesoleresponsibilityofparentsandcaregivers.Justlikechildrenandyouthneedpermanentconnectionstohelpthemthrive,familiesneedstrongcommunities.Therearethingsyoucandotohelpmakeyourneighborhoodssafe—notjustforyourfamily,butforthebenefitofallthechildreninyourcommunity.

Parentandcommunitycafésareahelpfultoolforbolsteringcommunitysupport.Caféscanincludeparents,neighbors,schoolprofessionals,churchmembers,andotheradultsinyourcommunitywhoareconcernedwiththehealthandwell-beingofchildren.Thesegatheringsshouldbeintimateanddesignedtoigniteconversationamongparticipantsaboutthepresenceof—orlackof—protectivefactorsintheirownlives.Communities

withcommittedparentswhohavetakenonaleadershiprolehaveimprovedtheirneighborhoodsandimprovedchildsafety.ProgramslikeCircleofParents®(seeboxonpage11)canhelpstrengthencommunities.

Otherthingsyoucandotoengageyourcommunityinpreventingchildabuseandneglectinclude(PreventChildAbuseAmerica,n.d.):

• Building partnershipstoenhancesupportforparentsandcaregivers

• Educating community membersaboutthestagesofchilddevelopment

• Promoting a community responsibilityforthehealthandwell-beingofchildren

• Developing a consistent languagewithinyourcommunityaboutprotectivefactorsandthesignsofabuseandneglect

• Building awarenessabouttheavailableservicesandsupportsforfamiliesandchildren

Parenting a Child Who Has Experienced Abuse or Neglect https://www.childwelfare.gov

14This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. Available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/parenting_CAN.cfm

RESOURCES ON COMMUNITY SUPPORT

TheCommunityCaféLearningCommunityequipscommunitieswiththetools(inEnglishandSpanish)toorganizegatheringstodiscusstheiruniqueconcernsandbuildrelationshipstohelpstrengthenfamilies:http://www.thecommunitycafe.com/

EssentialsforChildhood:StepstoCreateSafe,Stable,andNurturingRelationships,aguidefromtheNationalCenterforInjuryPrevention,DivisionofViolencePrevention,withintheCentersforDiseaseControlandPrevention,aimstohelpconcernedindividualsandcommunitiespromotethesehealthyrelationships:http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/childmaltreatment/essentials/index.html

TheMaternalandChildHealthLibraryatGeorgetownUniversityoffersCommunityServicesLocator,anonlinedirectoryforfindingcommunityservicesforchildrenandfamilies:http://www.mchlibrary.info/KnowledgePaths/kp_community.html

TheNationalParentHelplineprovidesparentsandcaregiverswithemotionalsupportandcanlinkyoutoservicesinyourState.Tofindavailableservicesnearyou,visithttp://www.nationalparenthelpline.org/find-support,orcall1.855.4.A.PARENT(1.855.427.2736).

ConclusionIfyouaretheparentorcaregiverofachildwhohasexperiencedmaltreatment,helpinghimorherthroughthatpaincanbedaunting,yetthereareresourcesavailabletohelp.It’simportanttorememberthatmanychildrenwhohavebeenabusedorneglecteddonotgrowuptoabuseothersandcanlivehappyandhealthylives.Youandyourfamilywillplayanimportantroleinyourchild’shealing,andthemoreknowledgeyouacquireaboutmaltreatmentandtheservicesavailableforsupport,thebetterpreparedyouwillbetohelpyourchildthroughthisdifficulttime.

Resources

ChildWelfareInformationGatewayhttps://childwelfare.gov

AmericanAcademyofChildandAdolescentPsychiatryhttp://www.aacap.org/

CenterfortheStudyofSocialPolicy,StrengtheningFamiliesProtectiveFactorsFrameworkhttp://www.cssp.org/reform/strengthening-families

NationalChildTraumaticStressNetworkhttp://www.nctsn.org/

NationalFosterParentAssociationhttp://nfpaonline.org/

StopItNow!http://www.stopitnow.org/warnings#behavioral

Parenting a Child Who Has Experienced Abuse or Neglect

15This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. Available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/parenting_CAN.cfm

https://www.childwelfare.gov

TheCenterontheDevelopingChildatHarvardUniversityhttp://developingchild.harvard.edu/

TheChildTraumaAcademyhttp://childtrauma.org/

TheSubstanceAbuseMentalHealthServicesAdministrationNationalCenterforTrauma-InformedCarehttp://www.samhsa.gov/nctic/

References

AdministrationforChildrenandFamilies,OfficeofPlanning,ResearchandEvaluation.(2013).NationalSurveyofChildandAdolescentWell-BeingNo.20:AdverseChildhoodExperiencesinNSCAW.Retrievedfromhttp://www.acf.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/opre/aces_brief_final_7_23_13_2.pdf

CenterforEarlyEducationandDevelopment.(n.d.)What’sthedifferencebetweendisciplineandpunishment?Retrievedfromhttp://www.cehd.umn.edu/CEED/publications/questionsaboutkids/disciplineenglish.pdf

CenterfortheDevelopingChild.(n.d.).Toxicstress:Thefacts.Retrievedfromhttp://developingchild.harvard.edu/topics/science_of_early_childhood/toxic_stress_response/

CenterfortheSocialandEmotionalFoundationsforEarlyLearning.(2011).Attachment:Whatworks?Retrievedfromhttp://csefel.vanderbilt.edu/briefs/wwb_24.pdf

Felitti,V.J.,&Anda,R.(2009).Therelationshipofadversechildhoodexperiencestoadultmedicaldisease,psychiatricdisorders,andsexualbehavior:Implicationsforhealthcare.InR.Lanius,E.Vermetten,&C.Pain(Eds.),Thehiddenepidemic:Theimpactofearlylifetraumaonhealthanddisease.Retrievedfromhttp://www.acestudy.org/yahoo_site_admin/assets/docs/LaniusVermetten_FINAL_8-26-09.12892303.pdf

Keck,G.,&Kupecky,R.(2002,2009).Parentingthehurtchild.ColoradoSprings,CO:NAVPRESS.(Originalworkpublished2002).

PreventChildAbuseAmerica.(n.d.)Promotingchilddevelopmentbysupportingfamilies.Retrievedfromhttp://www.preventchildabuse.org/images/docs/promotingdevelopmentbrochure.final.pdf

Pizzolongo,P.,&Hunter,A.(2011).Iamsafeandsecure:Promotingresilienceinyoungchildren.YoungChildren.Retrievedfromhttp://www.naeyc.org/files/yc/file/201103/PromotingResilience_Pizzolongo0311.pdf

TheFosterCareandAdoptionResourceCenter.(2012)Workingwithchildrenwhohavebeentraumatized.Retrievedfromhttp://wiadopt.org/Portals/WIAdopt/Tipsheets/AbuseNeglect/Working%20with%20Children%20Who%20Have%20Been%20Traumatized.pdf

Parenting a Child Who Has Experienced Abuse or Neglect https://www.childwelfare.gov

Saul.J.(2012).Healthconsequencesofviolenceandabuseacrossthelifespan[Presentation].Retrievedfromhttp://ncdsv.org/images/FWV_ConBriefing_%20HealthConsequencesViolenceAcrossAbuseLifespan_4-18-2012.pdf

U.S.DepartmentofHealthandHumanServices.(2012).TheAFCARSreport:PreliminaryFY2011estimatesasofJuly2012(19).Retrievedfromhttp://www.acf.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/cb/afcarsreport19.pdf

Suggested Citation:ChildWelfareInformationGateway.(2013).

Parentingachildwhohasexperiencedabuseorneglect.Washington,DC:U.S.DepartmentofHealthandHumanServices,Children’sBureau.

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Administration for Children and Families Administration on Children, Youth and Families Children’s Bureau