negotiating conflict in the workplace conflict management appau –institute for facilities...
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NEGOTIATING CONFLICT IN THE WORKPLACE
Presented by
American University
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
CONFLICT
A state of disharmony
A disagreement or clash between ideas, principles
A collision of positions
To be in or come into opposition
#APPAU Slide 2
WORKPLACE CONFLICT
Has increased as the #1 problem seen in
EAPs
Is the leading source of stress for adults,
more so than health issues, financial or family
problems
Causes about one million Americans to miss
work every day
#APPAU Slide 3
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT
CONFLICT?
Most people dread conflict and entering into negotiations. Why?
Because they believe one person must win and the other person must lose.
#APPAU Slide 4
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
OBJECTIVES
To understand how YOU respond to conflict
To develop skills for dealing with conflict to achieve
mutually acceptable agreements
To learn the concepts of Principled Negotiation as a tool
for addressing conflict
#APPAU Slide 5
CONFLICT IN FACILITES
Budget
Hiring choice
Job assignments
Work orders
Team members
Space
Resources
Policy
Procedure
Professors
Unions
Egos
Personalities
The job
#APPAU Slide 6
HOW DO YOU APPROACH
CONFLICT?
#APPAU Slide 7
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
WAYS TO APPROACH CONFLICT
Avoiding
Competing
Collaborating
Accommodating
Compromising
#APPAU Slide 8
#APPAU Slide 9
FIVE STYLES
AVOIDING
Non-Confrontational approach – used when
conflict is too painful or uncomfortable
Relationships – LOW
Personal Goals – LOW
Pros – doesn’t escalate conflict; postpones
Cons – unaddressed/unresolved problems
#APPAU Slide 10
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
COMPETING
Authoritarian approach – winning is key
Relationships – LOW
Personal Goals – HIGH
Pros – Goal Oriented
Cons – May breed hostility
#APPAU Slide 11
COLLABORATING
Problem Solver approach – optimum result provided for those involved
Relationships - HIGH
Personal Goals – HIGH
Pros – Creates trust, maintains positive relationships, builds commitments
Cons –Time consuming, energy consuming
#APPAU Slide 12
ACCOMMODATING
The nice “guy” approach
Relationships - HIGH
Personal Goals - LOW
Pros – relationships are maintained
Cons – goal is lost – results may be ineffective
#APPAU Slide 13
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
COMPROMISING
Middle ground approach – willing to lose now in hopes of winning later
Relationships – some concern
Personal Goals – some concern
Pros – for complex issues without simple solutions
Cons – no one really satisfied; less than optimal solutions get implemented
#APPAU Slide 14
OPTIONS
Take the hard approach – battle of wills, adversaries, focus
on positions….and unwilling to concede,
Take the soft approach – focus on preserving relationships
ahead of results, stay friends, still focus on position, but be
willing to concede
#APPAU Slide 15
PRINCIPLED NEGOTIATION
• Separate the people from the problem
People
• Focus on interests, not positions
Interests
• Generate a variety of options
Options
• Insist that options be based on objective standards
Criteria
#APPAU Slide 16
Or, you can change the
game…an interest based
approach!
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
NEGOTIATION
A transaction between two or more people leading to an
exchange of information resulting in an agreed outcome
with both parties having their right to veto.
- Roger Fisher and William Ury
#APPAU Slide 17
PEOPLE
Separate the people from the problem
Attack the problem, not each other
People are human; emotions can get in the way with trying to understand the problem
Try not to let how you feel about the person get in the way of solving the problem
Discuss perceptions
If the problem IS the relationship, deal with that separately
#APPAU Slide 18
INTEREST
Focus on interests, not positions
Behind opposed positions lie many more shared interests than conflicting ones
Human needs may be the motivator
What is it that you really need? What are you trying to satisfy? What are they trying to satisfy?
Openly discuss
#APPAU Slide 19
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
#APPAU Slide 20
OPTIONS
Generate a variety of possibilities before deciding what to do
Invent options for mutual gain
Separate inventing from deciding
Brainstorm – when stuck, sit back and be creative
Look at shared interests
Obstacles: judging, assumptions, believing it must be a fixed-pie
#APPAU Slide 21
CRITERIA
Insist on objective criteria
Bring standards of fairness to the table
Be specific w/facts
Use recent comparisons
Examples: market value, salary surveys, professional standards, peer institutions
#APPAU Slide 22
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
#APPAU Slide 23
CHANGE THE GAMEFriends – goal is agreement
Make concessions to cultivate relationship
Soft on people, trust others
Change your positions easily, make offers and disclose the bottom-line
Insist on agreement, try to avoid a contest of will and yield to pressure
Soft
Participants are adversaries – goal is victory
Demand concessions
Hard on people and problem, distrust others
Dig into your position, make threats and mislead as to your bottom-line
Insist on your position, try to win a contest of will and apply pressure
Hard
Participants are problem-solvers – goal is wise outcome
Separate people from problem – soft on people and hard on problem
Process is independent of trust
Invent options for mutual gain, develop multiple options to choose from and decide later
Insist on using objective criteria, try to reach a result based on standards independent of will and yield to principle not pressure
Principled
IF YOU CAN’T AGREE…
est lternative o a egotiated greement
What is your back up plan?
Don’t come to the table with a bottom-line, but know what you can fall back on.
Know your options!
#APPAU Slide 24
ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS
You can walk away and come back
You can bring in a third party
Keep negotiations private
Assess the situation – if there is a potential for
violence, get help
Preventing conflict is better than having to handle it
once it is present
#APPAU Slide 25
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Conflict Management
APPAU – Institute for Facilities Management
ARE YOU A MOTIVATED
NEGOTIATOR?
Communication skills
Listening is key!
Coaching skills
Values
Customer Oriented
Care for others
Positive-Enthusiasm
Confidence
Role model
Integrity, trustworthy
Objectivity – don’t stereotype
Analyze issues - creativity
Know your own strengths
Know your weaknesses
Fair and balanced
#APPAU Slide 26
Resource for Principled Negotiation: “Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement without Giving In”
Roger Fisher and William Ury; of the Harvard Negotiation Project
American University
202-885-2689
Conflict Management Styles Quiz Source: Reginald (Reg) Adkins, PhD, Elemental Truths
We each have our own way of dealing with conflict. The techniques we use are based on many variables such as our basic underlying temperament,
our personality, our environment and where we are in our professional career. However, by and large there are five major styles of conflict
management techniques in our tool box. In order to address conflict, we draw from a collaborating, competing, avoiding, accommodating or compromising style of management. None of these strategies is superior in and of itself. How effective they are depends on the context in which
they are used.
Each statement below provides a strategy for dealing with a conflict. Rate each statement on a scale of 1 to 4 indicating how likely you are to
use this strategy.
1 = Rarely 2 = Sometimes 3 = Often 4 = Always
Be sure to answer the questions indicating how you would behave rather than how you think you should behave.
1. I explore issues with others so as to find solutions that meet everyone’s needs.
2. I try to negotiate and adopt a give-and-take approach to problem situations.
3. I try to meet the expectations of others.
4. I would argue my case and insist on the merits of my point of view.
5. When there is a disagreement, I gather as much information as I can and keep the lines of communication
open.
6. When I find myself in an argument, I usually say very little and try to leave as soon as possible.
7. I try to see conflicts from both sides. What do I need? What does the other person
need? What are the issues involved?
8. I prefer to compromise when solving problems and just move on.
9. I find conflicts challenging and exhilarating; I enjoy the battle of wits that usually follows.
10. Being at odds with other people makes me feel uncomfortable and anxious.
11. I try to accommodate the wishes of my friends and family.
12. I can figure out what needs to be done and I am usually right.
13. To break deadlocks, I would meet people halfway.
14. I may not get what I want but it’s a small price to pay for keeping the peace.
15. I avoid hard feelings by keeping my disagreements with others to myself.
How to score the Conflict Management Quiz:
As stated, the 15 statements correspond to the five conflict resolution styles. To find your most preferred style, total the points in the respective
categories. The one with the highest score indicates your most commonly used strategy. The one with the lowest score indicates your least preferred strategy. However, if you are a leader who must deal with conflict on a regular basis, you may find your style to be a blend of styles.
Style Corresponding Statements Total
Collaborating 1, 5, 7
Competing
4, 9, 12
Avoiding
6, 10, 15
Accommodating
3, 11, 14
Compromising
2, 8, 13
Brief Descriptions of the Five Conflict Management Styles
Collaborating Style: Problems are solved in ways in which an optimum result is provided for all involved. Both sides get what they want and
negative feelings are minimized.
Pros: Creates mutual trust; maintains positive relationships; builds commitments.
Cons: Time consuming; energy consuming.
Competing Style: Authoritarian approach.
Pros: Goal oriented; quick.
Cons: May breed hostility.
Avoiding Style: The non-confrontational approach.
Pros: Does not escalate conflict; postpones difficulty.
Cons: Unaddressed problems; unresolved problems.
Accommodating Style: Giving in to maintain relationships.
Pros: Minimizes injury when we are outmatched; relationships are maintained.
Cons: Breeds resentment; exploits the weak.
Compromising Style: The middle ground approach.
Pros: Useful in complex issues without simple solutions; all parties are equal in power.
Cons: No one is ever really satisfied; less than optimal solutions get implemented.
