leadership and the art of receiving feedback
TRANSCRIPT
Feedback and how to RECEIVE it
Eric De Pooter
Feedback and how to receive it
Definition
Receiving= skill to develop
Receiving vs accepting
Too much ?
Direct indirect official unofficial direct indirect clear unclear (non)verbal
Advantages (Inner )development•Trust •Relationships •Output and results
Development
Lead by example
Resistance•Who What How Where Why When
Pull vs push
Work on me
first
Feedback culture
Difficult Receivers can’t receive
givers can ‘t give
Love Hate Fear learn vs accept me as I am
Skills• Self confidence?• Assertiveness?• Trust?• Self efficacy
Coaching Recognition Evaluation
3
?
Our reactions Unknown What to do with info Honest intention Used against us
Pain Trauma Rejection Guilt
4
Content: unfair, not helpful, untrue
Relationship: lack of trust, integrity, compentence
Me: me, myself and I endangered
TRIGGERS
ContentRecognition Coaching Evaluation
Content
6
Where does it come from
Expectations
Understanding
Content
Blind spots
7
Content
?What are characteristics of the person you would accept every feedback of?
8
RelationshipTrust
Integrity
Competence
Recognition
Respect Autonomy
Me, myself and I
Personality differences In giving
& receiving feedback
“No big deal”
Hate feedback “We’ll see”
Recovery from negative
Duration of positiveLow
High
High
12
13
Complexity
World PeopleIntentions
14
Compassion
15
16
Self efficacy vs self confidence
Some basicsDo
• Mind your emotions• Listen and shut up• Ask for examples• Summarize and check• Ask for suggestions • Thank • Say what you will (not) do
Do not
• Do not interrupt • Do not get defensive• No “yes but…”• Do not accept everything just like that
17
Act... like in ACTION
Know yourself & your feedback reaction pattern
Prepare & exercise
Ask support
Have a good life!Eric De Pooter