As usual we will not be printing a Newsletter forAugust. However, in September we are starting witha change in timing of the printing. Ever since wehave produced a Newsletter, long before my time, thedeadline for contributions has been the weekendfollowing a monthly executive committee meeting.This has had the effect of your receiving theNewsletter at different times in the month, and,worse, this created difficulty for providinginformation about activities. Therefore, fromSeptember, our deadlines will be the first of themonth; therefore, hopefully you will get yourNewsletter in time for plenty of notice for all thatmonth’s activities.

(There is also a small technical point in that theCounty Print Unit usually receives work requeststhrough the County intranet,obviously, but our Newsletter comesvia the external internet and this cancause confusion and delays in the PrintUnit. But then, I suppose, you don’tfind that bit of information all that interesting.)

Dave Sergeant”Chairman

At our committee meeting on Friday we continuedour discussion about the Annual Reunion and

UNISON BRANCH OFFICE - Room A38, County Hall Preston Lancs PR1 OLDTel. 01772 533072 or email:- unison.enquiries@lancashire.gov.uk

County Hall

BowlingFriday 30th July at 2.00pmcome along to play or just chat

Talks - 2pm startFriday 29th October

Rev Bob Worswick Perils of a Visiting Preacher

Friday 26th NovemberMr Ronnie Ray 40 years in Showbiz

Northern Sub-GroupTalks - 2pm start

Tuesday 12th OctoberRoy Smith talks on “Traditional Customs

and Dance” a Country Wide Topic

Walks 2010Wednesday 14th July

A walk that starts at Greenhalgh Castle

Wednesday 21st JulyRoy's Long Walk

11th August & 8th Septemberfurther information in this Newsletter

Health Branch

Welcome Day’s Out trips on:-Wednesday 21st July &

Wednesday 15th September(details in this Newsletter)

Diary Dates 2010Diary Dates 2010Diary Dates 2010

1

LancashireRetired Members Section

David SergeantDavid SergeantDavid Sergeant - Chairmanemail:- davesergeant@yahoo.com

Maureen VassMaureen VassMaureen Vass - Secretaryemail:- maureen.vass@btinternet.comtelephone:- 01257 271480

NewsletterEDITION NO. 122EDITION NO. 122EDITION NO. 122 --- July 2010July 2010July 2010

Edited & Produced by:Edited & Produced by:Edited & Produced by:

Mrs Christine ShawBuzon 02067,Camino Tossal 5,03729, Lliber,Alicante, Spain.email:- casashaw@gmail.com

On the web at :- http://www.unisonlancs.org.uk/retired.asp

News from theExecutive Committee

NewsletterChanges

Dinner but we were disappointed that very fewmembers had let us have their views. We do not meetin August and would really appreciate any commentsmembers wish to make on how this event shouldcontinue in the future.

Members can let us have their comments by a varietyof ways - either by email to my emailaddress or by phone or by letter via theBranch office. We really

would like to have yourviews so that this eventcan be a reallyinteresting and enjoyable one for all

our Members.

There will not be a newsletter in August so we will beissuing our September one at the beginning ofSeptember.

The holiday season is upon us but our Bowlingafternoon at Penwortham Bowling Club will stilltake place on Friday 30th of July. For those who arenot on holiday it is a pleasant way to spend theafternoon.

Maureen Vass”Secretary

Talk Tuesday 12th October2pm Headway Hotel

The 2010/11 programme begins with a talk by RoySmith called “Traditional Customs and Dance a

Country Wide Topic”.This was scheduledoriginally for lastJanuary but which hadto be cancelled becauseof the bad weather.

Please come along, bring your friends and enjoy freecoffee/tea and biscuits.

(Note a reminder that future talks will be held onthe 3rd Tuesday in the month, not the 2nd as inOctober).

Ray Rudge”

Treasurer

Group Correspondent Don Windle, 25The Howgills, Fulwood, Preston,Lancashire PR2 9LX.Telephone: (01772) 713820.

Arrive in good time and lock up your car carefully.

Listen to the weather forecast and bring suitableclothing, plus dry socks.

Wear stout footwear, footpaths and bridleways canbe muddy and eroded at any time of the year.

Our programme for 2010 is as follows14th July, 21st July (Roy's long walk) 11th August,8th September, 13th October,.3rd November (Programme meeting)

Grid References give Location of Meeting PointsIf you are not familiar with grid references, themeeting points can be located from most regular 4miles to 1 inch motoring maps.As there isn’t a Newsletter in August, see below walkitinerary for July to September.

The next walk is on Wednesday 14th July start at11am. Walk Leader is Joan Booth, you can contacther on 01772 732177 or Mobile: 07879038193.

Meet at GARSTANG in the car park adjacent to theGarstang Discovery Centre rendezvous in the easternend near the River Wyre.

Landranger Sheet 102. Grid Reference 493 454Ordnance Survey Outdoor Leisure 41

A walk of approximately 8 miles there are toilets atthe car park.A walk to Greenhalgh Castle, Sullom Side. CalderVale, Kelbrick, Lower Cottage Farm, Bank Farm,Moorhouse, Burns Farm, Grizedale, Pedders Woodand Woodacre.

On Wednesday 21st July Roy Richwill be organising another walk ofapproximately 14 miles. If thereare any keen walkers pleasecontact Roy on 01772 454601 forarrangements. Please note this willbe a 10am start.

The August walk is on Wednesday 11th August start

2

The contents of this newsletter are not necessarily the views of the Retired Members Executive Committee.

NorthernSubGroup

RetiredMembersWalkingGroup

Lancashire Wallopers

at 11am. Walk Leader is Flo Windle, you can contacther on 01772 713820 or Mobile: 07502161755.

Meet in the pay and display car park at HORTON INRIBBLESDALE on the west side of the B6479 Settleto Ribblehead Road approximately six miles north ofSettle. Pen-y-ghent immediately to the east is notincluded in the walk. Fifty miles of scenic drivingfrom Preston.

Landranger sheet 98. Grid reference 808 726Ordnance Survey Outdoor Leisure 2

A walk of approximately 9 miles, there are toilets atthe car parkOur route follows the Pennine Way then a section ofthe Ribble Way, almost to Old Ing Farm, then westto High Birkwith. Cross over the River Ribble toHornsey Hill and Selside. Across the moorland toSulber Nick back to Horton in Ribblesdale

The September walk is on Wednesday 8thSeptember start at 11am. Walk Leader is Flo Windle,you can contact her on 01772 713820 or Mobile:07502161755.

Meet at WARTON near CARNFORTH in the picnicsite car park located in the worked out quarry on thesouth face of Warton Crag. From Carnforth followthe Silverdale road into Warton village to the BlackBull Inn. Turn west up Crag Road in 0.4 miles turnright under the height barrier into the car park.

Landranger Sheet 97. Grid Reference 491 724

A walk of approximately 8 miles, there are no toiletsHandy unless we call at RSPB Leighton Moss.A steep bank through a nature reserve to start with. A

wealth of wild flowers on acalcareous soil. WartonCrag was occupied by ourancestors in the Bronze Ageand in more recent timesprovided a site for a

signalling beacon. The walk continues to Crag Foot,Silverdale Green, Leighton Moss, Leighton Hall.

Flo & Don Windle”Walk Organisers

Please keep sending your stamps to Derian House.Many envelopes get thrown away; it only takes aminute to tear the stamp off the corner of anenvelope. (Please leave 1 inch around the stamp)Save the stamps in a container till you get a few tosend on to the address below this is an on goingstamp appeal for a very worthy cause.

Derian House Children’s Hospice, The Appeals

Office, Derian House. Chancery Road, AstleyVillage, Chorley Lancs. PR7 1DH.

Fran Francis”Talk Organiser 01772 742459

Since our last report we have had seven newMembers, we offer them a warm welcome. They are:

Mrs Catherine BennettLostock Hall;

Mrs Sheila HaslemFulwood;

Mrs Josie HobsonRibbleton;

Duncan MacleanBurnley;

Mrs Linda RamseyBurnley;

Mrs Kathleen ScahillBlackburn;

Ronald WilcockCharnock Richard.

There are no deaths to report this month

3

DeathsofMembers

MembershipMembershipMembershipSecretary’s ReportSecretary’s ReportSecretary’s Report

Health Branch TripsContact Irene Cottam on 01772 492936

Wednesday 21st JulyWelcome Day Out Trip with Courier to IlkleyMoor and District in the morning A four coursecarvery lunch at the Millstones, York’s Tales Tour

in the afternoon, Ending at Ripley village

Wednesday 15th SeptemberWelcome Day Out Trip with Courier to KirbyLonsdale Cumbria. Visiting Devil’s Bridge andRuskin’s View. Lunch in a 13th Century Inn called

Marton Arms. Afternoon aNorth Shires Tales Tour,travel the Yorkshire Dales,Lake District and Bowlandfinishing at TulchanKnitwear Mill and theCountry Harvest Outlet.

Cost per trip is £22.50 all inclusive.Preston Bus Station at 9.15am or Sharoe Green

Hospital at 9.30am for Both Trips

Apartment available to Rent"Luxury 2 bed pent house apartment on exclusive LaFinca championship golf course 10 km inland midway between Alicante & Murcia, Spain for rental.Sleeps 4.

Well equipped and beautifully furnished. Breakfastbalcony and spacious roof-terrace with stunningviews of the Course and of the surroundingcountryside. Within easy drives of beautiful beaches,countryside, walks, cultural sites. Excellent for activeor lazy holidays."

£300 - £325 per week + 20% off for all UnisonMembers. For more information please visit:

http://www.lafincagolfowners.orgOr ring Bill Taylor on:- 07768 793 312 or

01254668404

and to finish…...

These are from a book called Disorder in theAmerican Courts, and are things people actually saidin court, word for word, taken down and nowpublished by court reporters.

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husbandsaid to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the momentof the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affectyour memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect yourmemory?WITNESS: I forget.ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us anexample of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when aperson dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about ituntil the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s twenty, much like your IQ.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picturewas taken?WITNESS: Are you sh***ing me?

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a differentattorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriageterminated?WITNESS: By death.ATTORNEY: And by whose death was itterminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had abeard.ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm goingwith male

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsieshave you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up toomuch of a fight.

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that youexamined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead atthe time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.

and the best for last……...

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed theautopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patientwas alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my deskin a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have stillbeen alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could havebeen alive and practicing law.

4

Ourmembershipis1947(including35associatemembers)