Playing Favorites

STICKY STATEMENT

When playing favorites, everyone loses!

LESSON OBJECTIVE

Children will learn that playing favorites is a sin and will be encouraged to treat everyone as a valued creation of God.

LESSON OVERVIEW

We are all created in the image of God. Jesus taught that we should love our neighbors as ourselves. When we play favorites, we are hurting others by not giving them equal value. We will use the words of Jesus and the Apostle James to drive home the truth that playing favorites is a game everyone loses.

KEY VERSE

James 2:9

DEFINITIONS

Sin: “anything that we think, say, or do that disobeys God”Partiality: “playing favorites”

TEACHER’S CHECKLIST

1. A PowerPoint is available for this lesson.2. A comfortable chair (Hook)3. A handheld fan (Hook)4. A small treat (one for each child) (Hook)5. Nice clothing (Lesson Content)6. Costume jewelry rings (Lesson Content)7. Shabby clothing (Lesson Content)8. The Reserved Seating sign (Lesson Content)9. Whiteboard (Lesson Content)10. Dry erase markers (Lesson Content)11. Optional: a large piece of butcher paper (Lesson Content)12. Optional: tape (Lesson Content)13. The “Important to God” cards (one per child) (Next Steps)14. Book: The Sneetches and Other Stories by Dr. Seuss (Younger Adaptation)15. Optional video: The Sneetches https://teachersource.wol.org/resource/OBS20/28-1/ (Younger

Adaptation)

Separated Lesson 2: Playing Favorites – 1

GENERAL LESSON INSTRUCTIONS

Teacher’s Note: Prior to teaching the lesson, place a Reserved Seating sign on a chair at the front of the room or in a special place in the room. This seat will be used in the skit during the Lesson Content section of the lesson.

In addition, be sure to print out enough of the “Important to God” cards so that each child can have one. It is recommended that they are printed on cardstock. The cards can be found at the end of this lesson.

HOOK

Teacher’s Note: If you have chosen to use the Younger Adaptation, use it instead of the following Hook.

If you are using the following Hook, be sure to pause multiple times to dote on one specific child. Follow the dialogue below. You will need a comfortable chair, a handheld fan, and a non-messy small treat that can be eaten while the child is in the chair. It is recommended that you recruit the child prior to the lesson and inform him or her of what will happen.

Hey there, boys and girls! Oh, wait a minute! [Hold up a finger for the group to wait.] [Insert a child’s name.], I want to give you this treat just because I think you’re a very special person in our Olympians group. Go ahead and eat it right now if you want to.

[Address the whole group.] What were we doing? That’s right; Hi, boys and girls. Today we are going to open our Bibles—oh, wait! [Hold up a finger for the group to wait.] [Insert the same child’s name again.], oh my goodness, you are eating that snack so awesomely! Let’s give [Insert the same child’s name again.] a round of applause for eating that snack like a pro! [Have everyone clap and cheer.] While I’m thinking about it, I think you deserve to sit in a better chair than that one. Let me give you something a bit more comfortable. I want you to be really relaxed during our lesson.

Teacher’s Note: Make a big deal about getting a different chair for them. Have it in the back of the room so you can go get it and jostle the other kids out of the way while you take it to the front and set it up. While you are bringing it forward, continue to make comments about why they need this special chair and how important they are to the Olympians group. When you get the chair to the front, have the child sit in it.

[Address the whole group.] Like I was saying, we are going to open our Bibles and learn what God says—hold on! [Insert the same child’s name again.], I don’t want you to get too warm during our lesson, so [Insert the name of a different child.] is going to fan you. [Give the fan to the second child and have him or her start fanning the child in the chair.]

[Insert the name of the child with the fan.], be sure to keep a steady breeze, so [Insert the name of the favored child.] will not get too hot.

[Address the whole group.] As I was trying to say, tonight we are going to learn what God says about treating everyone with equal value and importance. [Pause for disbelieving chuckles.] Now, knowing what we’re going to talk about, tell me, boys and girls, what are your thoughts about how [Insert the name of the child who was treated special.] was treated compared to all of the rest of you? [Allow for several responses.]

Separated Lesson 2: Playing Favorites – 2

Teacher’s Note: Give everyone the same small treat that was given to the “favorite” child. Tell them that they can all eat the snack during the lesson. If you chose to use the Younger Adaptation for the Hook, begin teaching here.

Tonight’s lesson is the second lesson of a four-part series called “Separated: Ripped and Repaired.” The focus of each of the lessons of this series is sin. [Show visual #1: the definition of sin.] “Sin” is “anything that we think, say, or do that disobeys God.” Sin separates us from God, but we will discover that God made a way for all people to have a relationship with Him.

Tonight, we are going to look at a warning from God’s Word about playing favorites. What do you think it means to play favorites? [Allow for several responses.] If you play favorites, you treat some people better than others. This is something we all need to watch for in our own lives to make sure we’re not guilty of doing. We will see that God does not want us to play favorites. When playing favorites, everyone loses! Repeat that with me. [Allow time for the Sticky Statement to be repeated.]

LESSON CONTENT

We’re going to open God’s Word because the Bible speaks about this idea of playing favorites and how we are supposed to treat all people. Open your Bible to James 2:9. James is in the New Testament portion of the Bible. [Allow time for the children to find James 2:9 in their Bibles.]

[Read James 2:9.] James, the half-brother of Jesus and the author of the Book of James, was writing to a group of people who were part of the church and loved God. He was reminding them how God wanted them to treat people. James wrote that to show partiality is a sin. [Show visual #2: the definition of partiality.] “Partiality” means “playing favorites.” His message was simple: “When playing favorites, everyone loses!”

James gave a good picture of the kind of playing favorites he was concerned about. Let’s do a little impromptu drama and see if you can figure out what is wrong with this picture.

Teacher’s Note: Have two piles of clothes ready for the drama: one pile of nice clothing and one pile of shabby clothing. Be sure that your Reserved Seating sign is on a chair at the front of the room or in a prominent place in the room. You are going to guide the children in acting out James 2:2-4. The actors will not have speaking roles but will need to just follow along as you read and describe.

Alright, we need two volunteers to help us act out part of the Book of James.

Teacher’s Note: Choose two children from the audience and invite them to the front of the room. Direct one child to put on the fine clothing and rings. Direct the other child to put on the shabby clothing.

[Address the actors.] All you will need to do is act out what is read. I will give you some directions as we read the passage from the Bible. Here we go! Let’s see what happens.

[Begin reading.] “For if there should come into your assembly a man with gold rings, in fine apparel, and there should also come in a poor man in filthy clothes …”

Teacher’s Note: Point to the two “actors” and have them come forward one at a time. Urge the child with the nice clothing to strut and act like he is a famous person. Remind the other child that he is not famous and should be ashamed to be seen in such shabby clothing.

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“… And you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say to him, ‘You sit here in a good place …’”

Teacher’s Note: Direct the child dressed in finer clothing to sit in the Reserved Seating chair. Lead the children in clapping, smiling, and cheering for this child.

“… And say to the poor man, ‘You stand there,’ or, ‘Sit here at my footstool.’”

Teacher’s Note: Direct the child dressed in shabby clothes to move to the other side of the room, away from the group, and sit on the floor. Shoo the child away with your hand and do not smile.

“… Have you not shown partiality among yourselves, and become judges with evil thoughts?”

Teacher’s Note: Leave the “actors” in their current places during the questioning.

[Address the child in the fancy clothing.] What did it feel like to be asked to sit in a place of importance? [Allow for a response.]

[Address the whole group.] How do you all think it felt to be the favorite? [Allow the other children to respond.] Our friend probably felt important, special, even honored because he/she got to sit in a special chair while we cheered and smiled at him/her.

[Address the child in the shabby clothing.] What did it feel like to be asked to stand away from the group and have to sit on the floor? [Allow for a response.] Being asked to stand away from the group probably made you feel unwanted, not valued, and not as important. This passage of Scripture that we read describes partiality or playing favorites.

James wrote to his listeners because they had a problem that needed to be corrected. He saw that they were guilty of treating people differently based on how they were dressed, how much money they seemed to have, or how they looked. He called their behavior of playing favorites a sin! [Read James 2:9.]

James reminded them that when playing favorites, everyone loses! Listen to James 2:4 again. [Re-read James 2:4.] How does the Bible describe this kind of behavior of playing favorites in this verse? [Allow responses.] James describes this behavior as evil!

Can anyone tell me how this kind of behavior is hurtful to others and why James calls it “evil”? [Allow for several responses.] Here is why we acted that scene out the way we did. Playing favorites like this puts some people down [Motion downward with your hand.] while lifting other people up [Motion upward with your hand.]. But God is telling us, through the words of James that we should treat people the same, no matter what. It doesn’t matter if they are different than us. God loves all people the same, and we should too. When you show partiality, it’s evil. We know that evil actions are sin.

How do you think God wants us to treat other people? [Allow for several responses.] Treating someone with respect and kindness lets the person know that you value and care about them. Treating someone with respect and kindness also indicates that you recognize their value as a human being who was created in the image of God. Let’s continue to read to find out how else God wants us to treat all people.

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[Read James 2:8.] James tells his readers that they are to love each other; that’s what God wants. God gave this direction to people a long time ago and Jesus had a similar message when He taught His followers to love their neighbor as themselves (Matthew 22:39). In fact, Jesus said that this command, to love your neighbor as yourself, is one of the two greatest commandments.

But who is your neighbor? Is it the person who lives next door to you? [Allow for several responses.]

Yes, the person who lives next door to you is your neighbor, but James and Jesus were not just talking about the people who live in the houses next to your house.

Some of you may not even have any houses around you. They were talking about anyone within your circle of influence; the people around you who you come into contact with on a daily basis. So, when you go to church, school, or even the grocery store, all those people you see are your neighbors. You need to treat all people with equal importance; treat them like they are created in the image of God because they are.

Genesis 1:27 tells us that God created human beings in His image. In Psalm 139:14, we’re told that we are all fearfully and wonderfully made. That means that God took the time to create each little thing about you. He also did that for every person on earth. So, when we play favorites or show special treatment toward some people, we are treating some as more valuable than others. But they are not; one person is not more valuable than another. It is a sinful practice to devalue someone who God values so highly. When playing favorites, everyone loses!

God does not play favorites. He could play favorites by only caring for people who live in Australia or only caring for people who have black hair, but the Bible is very clear that God does not play favorites. He loves all people! God wants all of us to love our neighbor as ourselves.

CONNECTION

So, if everyone in your circle of influence is your neighbor, how are you to love your neighbor? Well, we will understand this idea better by first brainstorming how we want people to show us that they care for us and find us valuable.

Teacher’s Note: As the kids give examples of how they want people to show love to them, write the suggestions on a whiteboard. If you do not have a whiteboard, hang a large piece of butcher paper on the wall instead. Regardless of how you will display your list, have a heart drawn around the words “Love my neighbor as myself” in the middle of the whiteboard or paper. Record the responses of the children around the heart.

As we brainstorm, I will record your answers for all to see. So, here is the question, “How do you know that someone loves you and thinks you are valuable?”

Teacher’s Note: Allow for several responses and record them on the whiteboard. Suggested answers: they show you respect, they talk to you, they play with you, they tell you directly, they do something for you, they give something to you, etc.

When a person shows you respect, is kind to you, talks with you, or compliments you, you feel like that person cares about you and considers you important. God wants you to love and treat everyone how you want to be loved and treated.

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Now, let’s take the ideas that we have written here and flip the scenario around. If you are going to love your neighbor as yourself, how should you treat them? What are some ways we show other people we love them and think they are valuable? [Go back through the ideas one at a time and read them to the kids.] This is how we should treat others: the same way you want to be treated.

People all around you, no matter how different they are, want to be treated the same way you want to be treated. The color of their skin doesn’t make someone more valuable. The size of their body doesn’t make someone more valuable. How smart they are doesn’t make someone more valuable. Treating each other in each of these ways [Refer to the things written on the whiteboard.], no matter who they are or what they believe, is a win for everyone, but when playing favorites, everyone loses!

God created each human in His own image. Look around at the people here; no, really take a good look at everyone in this room. Think of all the differences just in this room. Some have different colors of hair or skin. Some have eyes that are a different shape or color. Some are short. Some are tall. Some are strong. Some are fast. God values each of us the same.

CHOICE

Playing favorites is a sin that hurts others. Have you been playing favorites? If so, will you take a moment right now to tell God you are sorry for how you have acted? As you pray, ask God to help you to not just be kind, but to see each person as He sees them: valuable and created in His image.

In fact, that is a great prayer for all of us whether you have been playing favorites or not. As we finish up tonight, consider saying something like this to God:

Dear God, help me to see all people the way You see them. Help me to treat people with respect because they are created in Your image and important to You.

Teacher’s Note: You may need to repeat the prayer a second time to help the children as they pray. Make a point to pray for all of the children to treat each other the way they want to be treated.

NEXT STEPS

Teacher’s Note: Give each child one of the “Important to God” cards.

The card that you are receiving says this: “Everyone is important to God.” When you get home, color each letter a different color or with a different style. In whatever way you color them, make each letter look different than all the rest. Put it in a place where you will see it every day to remind you that everyone, no matter what they look like, is important to God.

YOUNGER ADAPTATION: (Hook)

Have you ever been hurt by the words or actions of other people? [Allow for several responses.] When people are mean to us, it can really hurt our feelings. I want you to hear part of a story. As you listen, focus on how the actions and words of some of the characters make others feel. This is not a real story, but it will help us think about some very real emotions.

Teacher’s Note: Read the first seven pages of The Sneetches and Other Stories by Dr. Seuss or watch the video instead of reading. End with the line that says, “They left them out cold in the dark of the beaches.” Here is the link for the video if you choose to show it instead of reading the book: https://teachersource.wol.org/resource/OBS20/28-1/.

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How would you describe the feelings of the Sneetches who didn’t have stars on their bellies? [Allow for several responses.] The way Dr. Seuss drew their faces, you can tell they felt sad and unwanted. Why were they feeling that way? [Allow for several responses.] That’s correct; the other Sneetches were being mean. The Sneetches with stars on their bellies were ignoring the Sneetches without stars. They were bragging about their stars. The star-belly Sneetches would not allow the plain-belly Sneetches to play with them or talk to them. The star-belly Sneetches were playing favorites.

PERSONAL TRAINING TIME

The Goal of the Personal Training Huddle: To help each child recognize areas where they play favorites and brainstorm how they can treat all people as valuable.

Discussion Questions

1. In what ways have you seen people treated as less valuable or less important than others? (Allow the children to give examples of what they have seen. Be sure that no one mentions any specific names. Possible answers: they ignore, make fun of, exclude them, etc. The goal of this question is to make sure the children understand the idea of playing favorites.)

2. In what way(s) have you been guilty of playing favorites? (It might be hard to get the children to begin to share answers to this question. As the PT coach, give a personal example of how you have been guilty of playing favorites. If it will help, create a scenario for the children. You could say something like, “When you come to Olympians, are there people you ignore because of how they dress or act? When you are at recess at school, are there certain people not allowed to play the game you are playing? Will you only sit by certain people at lunch? Will you only talk to certain people because of how they smell, look, or act?” The goal of this question is to help make the concept of playing favorites personal.)

3. How can you love your neighbor as yourself? (Encourage every child to give at least one idea. You could have each child write their answer on the back of their “Important to God” card. Remind the children to be creative as they color the letters on the card and to put the card in a place where they will see it regularly throughout the week.)

PARENT CONNECTION

Tonight’s lesson was the second lesson of a four-part series called “Separated: Ripped and Repaired.” The focus of each of the lessons of this series is sin. Sin separates us from God, but God made a way for all people to have a relationship with Him. Tonight, we focused on the sin of playing favorites.

Every person is made in the image of God, and God did not play favorites when He sent Jesus to die on the cross. Jesus died for the whole world! Sometimes, we play favorites without knowing, but when we play favorites, everyone loses! Tonight, we reminded the children that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves, and we brainstormed how we can show love to our neighbors.

Ask your child to share some ideas with you and share your own ideas about how people should be treated without partiality. Your child was given a card and challenged to color each of the letters on the card in a unique way to remind them that no matter what we look like, we are all important to God.

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The following link is to a music video you may find helpful in driving home the point that God values all of us alike: https://teachersource.wol.org/resource/OBS20/28-2/. Take some time to watch it with your children.

REVIEW QUESTIONS

1. True or False: Sin is “anything that we think, say, or do that disobeys God.” (True)2. True or False: The word partiality means “part of your group.” (False)3. What does partiality mean? (Playing favorites)4. Playing favorites is an example of what? (Sin)5. True or False: My sin hurts other people. (True)6. True or False: God plays favorites. (False)7. Whom did Jesus die for? (Everyone)8. Who is your neighbor? (Everyone)9. True or False: Teasing another child is a way to show love to your neighbor. (False)10. Finish the Sticky Statement: When playing favorites, … (everyone loses!)

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