intangible - chapter 2

8/3/2019 Intangible - Chapter 2

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Intangible

Chapter 2 - TroyThe phone rang as Troy pushed his way into the room. He kicked aside the dirty laundry,

mismatched socks flying in all direction. He had no idea where he had left his cell in the mess,but he hoped he could find it before whoever was calling got through to his voicemail, and ended

up leaving a message instead of speaking to him directly. Troy hated voicemail. It was so

impersonal.

Troy managed to make out the sound and track the cell despite its ring being muffled.

The ring tone was an older song, Pinks Dont Let Me Get Me. That meant it was his best

friend, Matt. The song was a joke between them, a promise between old buddies that no matter

how crazy their worlds would get, they would keep each other grounded and in touch with

reality. Matt had done his share to keep this promise during the rather vicious divorce of Troys

parents, when Troy had almost lost it several times. Troy had reciprocated when Matt had gonethrough a nasty break-up with his first serious girlfriend. The rest of their surroundings might be

going nuts, but they knew they could count on each other.

Troy reached the phone just in time, his fingers connecting with smooth plastic as he dug

through one of the largest piles of wrinkled clothing heaped upon his floor.

Hey, Matt. Whatchta up to, bro?

I got a line on a par-tay tonight, my man. Booze and girls. Itll be a blast, Matts

booming voice belted out of the little phone.

Hot girls?

Well... Troy knew what the hesitation meant. They had a different idea of what was

hot. Matt went for the social ideal, fashion model skinny, whereas Troy was attracted to

women with definite curves. Their preferences sometimes met in the middle, with average-sized

women who sported a somewhat voluptuous shape.

Well? What kind of party is this, Matt? You know I have a mid-term coming up.

I know I know, but you cant leave me hanging. It wouldnt be right to leave your

best bud having to play this one alone. Its not a really sexy party, I admit. Its the sciencesociety student lounge crawl, but get a couple of drinks into those geeky girls and they turn into

animals. And geeky or not, some of them are actually pretty cute. I wouldnt mind getting me a

piece of nerd girl tail, and therell be plenty of ladies there to your liking, Matt said, adding a

suggestive chuckle at the end.

Troy slumped on his bed, not even bothering to push any of the mess aside, and sighed.

His mother had stopped harassing him to keep the place neat since the divorce. He knew she felt


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indebted to him because he had sided with her when things had gone down and the battle had

gotten hostile. A far as he was concerned, his father was the prick who was responsible for

breaking up the family in the first place. The man had gone through some sort of mid-life crisis

and had ditched them for a promiscuous young thing. Until Troy had turned sixteen, he had been

forced to spend weekends and part of the summer with the despised man. Only Matt had kept

him sane on some of those days.

If I do this, youre gonna owe me, man. I was planning on studying tonight. I cant

afford to flunk another test.

Troys marks in school were less than pristine. He wasnt a natural scholar any more

than he was a natural jock, but he worked fairly hard to achieve a passing level despite the

struggle to keep his grades there. Part of his efforts was perhaps a dig at his father. The man

was obliged to pay for Troys education by the divorce agreement as long as Troy continued to

maintain a C average or better. Troy wanted to make his father pay in any way he could, and

having mediocre grades made the situation even more unpleasant for the man. Troys father hadalways berated his son for any less-than-perfect performance, leaving Troy with a bit of an

inferiority complex. His father would have been satisfied if Troy had either demonstrated

academic adeptness or had failed altogether so that he hadnt been expected to pay for his sons

schooling. Having to shell out money for lukewarm results irked the man to no end.

Ill help you study tomorrow if you go to this shindig with me tonight, Matthew

promised. Theres a sweet thing in chemistry that I have my eye on, Patty. This will be a

perfect opportunity for me to get close to her, but I need my wing man.

Alright, alright so where do I have to be and when? Troy asked. He kicked a shirtand a few books off of his bed so he could prop his feet up.

It starts in the computer science lounge. You wouldnt think it, but those geeks know

how to party electric jell-o and a tub of their own special cocktail mix. Ill meet you there.

The crawl runs from that lounge into the chem building and then off to the life sciences. It ends

in the psych lounge.

Fine. But dont expect me to be anything other than moral support. I dont plan to get

crazy or hook-up with anyone.

It was hard to study with a hangover, a fact Troy knew all too well. One of his Fs haddefinitely been the result of a two day bender, one that he had gone on when he had split up with

his last girlfriend. That had really stung. He had liked Alanna a lot, and they had dated for three

months before sleeping together a couple of times. Then she had told him that he had to either

let her into his life more, or she was done with him. He hadnt been able to give her what she

had asked for. He had trust issues, thanks to his Mom and Dads ugly divorce, and that created

definite reservations about getting too close to anyone.


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There had been a reason for Alannas insecurities, beyond the fact that Troy had been a

little aloof. Alanna had been on the heavy side. While Matt understood Troys tastes and didnt

fault him for it, his other friends were shallow. They teased Troy whenever he flirted with full-

figured women, laughing at him for being a chubby-chaser. Troy had taken to hiding his dates

from his friends, and Alanna had taken offence to that. When Troy had refused to concede to

any of her demands to meet his friends, partially because he was trying to protect her and

partially because he felt the need to protect himself, she had dropped him. He hadnt dated

anyone since, and that had been almost a year ago.

Troy did manage a quick review of his notes before heading out. He was taking a history

course, as well as an anthropology course and a couple of sociology ones. He had changed his

major three times already because he couldnt make up his mind what exactly he wanted to do.

His father had directed him to do a business degree, but Troy had chosen something else just to

thumb his nose at the man. He had started with a liberal arts degree with a philosophy major in

the beginning, knowing just how much that would drive his father wild. Then, when Toy had

realized that the philosophy option really didnt work for him, he had switched to the classics.

That hadnt done anything for him either, so now he was trying the humanities on for size. He

figured the longer he could extend his schooling, the more he would make his father suffer. Troy

might be wishy-washy in some ways, but he certainly had a vengeful spirit.

Troy passed his mother on his way out of the house. Ever since she and his father had

split, she had seemed tired and harried. She had picked up an extra job to cover their expenses,

because the support payments his father was paying had not been enough to supplement her

regular income and cover their rather loft mortgage. They lived in an upper middle class

neighbourhood and while his mothers first job paid well, it wasnt enough to maintain their

lifestyle even in conjunction with the money they got from his father.

Im gone for the night, Mom. Ill be at school. There was no point in trying to lie.

She wouldnt go out of her way to dissuade him because she didnt try to run his life. She had

enough to handle with her own.

Dont you have a mid-term you were going to study for? You dont have your books

with you. Even exhausted his mother was still very perceptive.

Im not going to study. Matt swore he would help me with that tomorrow. Ill get it

done. I promise.

She gave him a look of exasperation but also acknowledged his choice with a curt nod.

Its your decision, hon. Just remember that schools your responsibility. If you let

things slide, the only person youre hurting is yourself.


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School was Troys only responsibility. His mother was tolerant, perhaps too tolerant, of

his lackadaisical approach to life. She didnt harangue him to pick up a part-time job or to do his

share of the housework. He felt guilty about that from time to time. He wondered if she was so

permissive because she somehow felt to blame for the way things had worked out with his father.

Troy certainly didnt attribute any of the blame to her.

I know, Mom. Dont worry.

Troy loved the sense of freedom that came with leaving the house without any of the

burdensome trappings of school. He liked the idea of getting away from everything, escaping his

troubles and his toils for the night, and hanging with Matt made it even better.

The young man was waiting for him by the entrance to the computer science building.

Matt was the night to Troy day. His friend was a stocky fellow with short-cropped dark hair

and equally dark eyes and a very loud personality. Matt was a joker, who wore a perpetual

smile, his face often flushed with mirth. Troy, on the other hand, had dirty blond hair and eyesthat were at some times blue and at other times green. He was a little on the slender side,

although reasonably athletic. He had never been a good enough athlete to make it on the varsity

teams, or qualify for a sports scholarship, but he still participated in inter-mural sports on some

of the A and B league teams, both for fitness and stress-relief.

Troy was not a shy person but nor was he exceptionally outgoing like Matt. When they

were socializing, Troy usually let Matt win the attention of others, while he held back and

observed. It meant that Troy got to enjoy the social scenes without having to actively participate

in any conversations. He preferred it that way. He liked talking to people, but only once he

really got to know them.

Awesome! Matt exclaimed when Troy arrived, giving him a hearty slap to the upper

arm. I hate partying without you, man. I gotta have my sidekick.

The words struck Troy as funny. That was the story of his life. He was the sidekick, the

wing man, the other guy. He was the average student, the average athlete, the average person.

He never stood out from the crowd. Most days, it was almost as though he were invisible. Troy

knew he could probably change that if he really wanted to, but that would require effort, and

Troy just didnt have that kind of enthusiasm for life. He didnt believe that he was meant to do

anything important, just live a dull life without offering the world anything extraordinary. He

had accepted his fate and did nothing to discourage it.

Lead on then, Troy said. Lets get this over with.

The party was more exciting than Troy had been expecting. Matt had been right when he

had suggested that the science geeks knew how to party. By the time he had left the first stop on

the crawl he was already tipsy, experiencing a happy, floaty sense of well-being, the result of


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vodka laced jell-o and a blue coloured brew containing various types of hard liquor. He forgot

his commitment to keeping mostly sober and imbibed again at the next three stops, joining Matt

in a couple of the drinking games in the assorted lounges. Troy even agreed to get up and dance

when Matt needed help convincing Patty, the chemistry major he was wooing, to join him on the

dance floor. Patty had a friend with her as well, Marcia, an introverted and zaftig Psych major

who had spent most of the crawl hiding behind Patty and looking uncomfortable. She started to

warm to Troy when it was clear that he was honestly being friendly with her and was not

spending time with her begrudgingly, as a favour to Matt.

Geology next, Matt declared, pulling Patty along as they left the biology lounge. She

was borderline drunk at this point, and very giggly.

Matt was the only one with enough mass to still be semi-sober after all that they had had

to drink. Marcia had stopped being withdrawn and was talking up a steady stream of general

observations and discussing her interest in human spirituality. It all sounded like a bunch of

garbage to Troy, but he pretended to be interested because he liked the sound of her voice andthe more he had to drink the more he was hoping she found him desirable. Troy was feeling

light-headed and every time he turned around or stood too quickly the entire room would spin a

little.

They didnt stay long in the penthouse, the nickname of the geology student lounge

because it was located on the top floor of the life sciences building. They had one round of

drinks and then Marcia suggested they go back to her dorm room and order some pizza. She had

her own stash of liquor there, even though it was against the rules, and they could finish off their

party, she said, somewhere secure. Troy thought it was a good idea, but at that point he was

already beginning to slur his words and was pretty open to suggestion. Patty wanted to go, sothat decided it for Matt as well.

When the pizza arrived, the foursome sat on the dorm room floor, cross-legged to eat.

Marcia, still talking a mile a minute, remarked on how this was a common position for spiritual

exercises.

I took a seminar on transcendental meditation once, she informed her three

companions. It was pretty cool almost as good as sex. By the time we were done I was really

relaxed, and refreshed. All the stress that you have built up inside you just seems to fall away.

Its supposed to make you feel like youre letting go of the physical world and floating above allyour worries and cares. Its really liberating.

Really? Patty said. Id like to try it. I have a lot of stress from exams. Maybe you

could teach us. She swayed where she sat, her eyes no longer capable of focussing on anything

for any length of time.


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Troy, while not believing in anything that could be considered new age, did like the

idea of being able to shed his troubles, even if only for a little while. He was willing to try

almost anything once, especially if Marcia was impressed by it. Feeling drunkenly amorous, he

was hoping that if he went along with something that she was suggesting, it could lead to her

asking him to spend the night. He wasnt looking for a relationship, but he was a normal young

male and certainly had his share of urges. Rid of his inhibitions due to the alcohol, he was

prepared to act on those urges, if the opportunity presented itself.

Im game, he stated, giving Marcia his most inviting smile. You should teach us.

How do you do this trance trance...that trance dental thing.

Marcia gave him a playful shove, her rounded cheeks rosy.

Transcendental meditation, silly. You meditate so that your spirit can transcend your

body. Its a way of achieving a higher state of being. You use it to find your Nirvana.

Nirvana? Matt said with a chuckle. What, do we have to hum Smells Like Teen

Spirit while we sit here with our eyes closed?

Both girls stared at him blankly, the 90s grunge band reference lost on them.

Never mind, he added, shaking his head. Im sure Troy gets it.

Well, I cant teach it to you in one evening, Marcia stated. Its a lengthy process.

You need to figure out your personal mantra, learn rounding, thats a type of breathing, and then

practice until you get it right. The seminar I took lasted for days. Ill show you the basics, but

you wont be able to do it properly from that. This can be just for fun.

Troy couldnt imagine spending days learning that kind of foolishness. He gave Matt a

questioning look and cocked an eyebrow.

Oh, so no humming. Well be sitting here chanting ohm.

Marcia ignored the crack. A personal mantra is a particular sound that resonates with

you on an individual level, and you dont speak it while meditating, you think it. Usually you

would have an interview with a yogi to help you figure it out. Since we dont have a mentor to

help you with that, try relaxing and finding a sound in your head that youre comfortable

repeating.

It was all that Troy and Matt could do to keep from laughing. Troy had to bite his tongue

and close his eyes. He could still sense Matt fighting the urge to make some goofy remark that

would get them both going.

Troys head, beyond the current thoughts of trying to charm Marcia and ignore Matt, was

filled with the desire to please his mother, unresolved bitterness directed towards his father and


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fear that he would never do anything meaningful with his life. Even drunk, he didnt like facing

most of those feelings. He reached in past all of that, and dug deep, coming up with a strange

little sound that for some reason appealed to him.

Okay, he told Marcia. I think Im ready.

Troy grinned internally as she moved over to him and touched him as she adjusted his

position for proper posture and explained how to breathe the way that he was supposed to. Then,

as they sat in a small circle, she quietly guided them into a meditative state. Troy was surprised

at how willing he was to go along with all of it, despite being a true sceptic. He found the

soothing tone Marcia was using extremely relaxing, and as he honed in on that little nonsense

word in his head, repeated ad nauseum, he eventually got a sense that he was lifting away from

his physical self.

The experience was disorienting for Troy at first. He felt himself rising mentally, with a

little of that euphoria that normally accompanied good sex, but it soon went beyond thatenjoyable sensation. Maybe he had been hasty in dismissing this sort of thing as flaky and

pointless, he decided, if only for the fact that it made him feel so good. He figured hed just keep

going and enjoying the warm fuzzies it gave him until Marcia brought things to a stop. He was

hoping by that point shed be as aroused as he was now and shed find a way to get rid of Matt

and Patty so they could compare meditation to sex on their own.

What Matt wasnt expecting was that at a certain point, the lifting sensation increased

tenfold, and for a short time, he felt like his spirit really had lost touch with his body, attached by

only the thinnest of psychic strings. It reminded him of floating in the ocean, drifting with the

tides and being buoyed and tossed occasionally by a random wave. He seemed to get farther andfarther away from his physical self, and while he wasnt sure exactly where he was going or how

he would get back, he was relaxed enough that he wasnt afraid. The best part was that Marcia

was right he did leave behind all of the baggage he carried with him in life and as a result, he

felt intensely free.

This state of mind, while soothing, was still chaotic in a way that Troy never would have

been able to describe. The world rushed past him in a delightful swirl of light and colour, like

something out of a psychedelic seventies video. He felt like he could reach out and touch

random souls as he passed them, the brightest presences in this strange new existence he was

exploring. He wondered if this was how this transcendental meditation thing was supposed towork, and if Matt was sharing in this mind-blowing high. They would have to compare notes in

the morning, before Troy started studying.

Gradually, his uncontrolled movement slowed, a little flare of someone elses spirit, one

surrounded completely by darkness, capturing Troys attention. He decided to see if he could

manoeuvre through this massive trance-world and actually make his way over to this little flare.

He purposefully slowed his movement, resisting the forces that pushed and pulled him, sort of


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like bracing himself against the current. Then he reached out for what he assumed was someone

elses spirit, drawing himself as close as he could manage.

The world solidified around Troy, and he realized that even though he was far from his

body, he had assumed his shape again, wearing a ghostly reproduction of his physical form. The

room he was in was cramped and pitch black, but he could still see the other person there. Fromthe slight stature of her small spirit, still contained within her body, he got the idea that it was a

child. Had he just stumbled into the bedroom of some poor little girl? If so, would he leave her

with nightmares? He prepared to depart again, searching for a way to head back to his body

before she awoke and he startled her.

Are you an angel? Did you come to rescue me?

Too late she was already awake. There was awe in the little girls voice and

desperation. Troy wasnt sure if he should answer her. He didnt even know if he could. He

decided that it wouldnt hurt to try and surprised himself by finding his voice, despite being non-corporeal.

No, Im not an angel. Im just a person. I got here by accident, I think. Its hard to

explain. What do you mean rescue you?

Troy lifted his transparent hand in front of his equally transparent face, a hand that

glowed in the dark, which was likely why this girl was able to see him. He could understand

why she might misinterpret what he was, based on the way he looked. He was also a little

disturbed by her words and the fact that she had assumed him a benevolent being rather than

some fearsome phantom, as most children would conclude upon spotting an inexplicable

presence lurking in their room. The average boy or girl would call out for their parents, crying

monster. The fact that this one didnt suggested that she must be facing worse demons than a

bogeyman under the bed or in her closet.

Rescue me from the bad man who took me, the girl explained. I was praying for help,

and you showed up. I was hoping you were an angel, coming to save me. I want to go home.

Please help me. Please take me home to my family. I dont want him to hurt me anymore. Ill be

good I promise. I wont let anyone trick me again. You have to help me.

Troys heart fell and his stomach churned. Had he somehow managed to come across an

actual victim of abduction? Could this possibly be real? If so, was there some way he couldhelp her? There were far too many questions for Troys drunken mind to handle. This was just

supposed to be a light-hearted game, not a bizarre rescue mission. Why would it have suddenly

turned into something so ugly and serious?


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He decided he had to act, to see if he could establish if this were just some alcohol-

induced manifestation or if there was some truth to the situation, as ridiculous as that might

seem.

Maybe I am here to help, he admitted to her. I dont exactly understand how I got

here, or how I found you. Lets start figuring this out by introducing ourselves. Im Troy.Whats your name?

Laura.

That was the only information he got from her, as a sudden blow, one that seem to jar his

entire world, shook Troy to the core. He saw stars and lost control. Suddenly, he was moving

again, leaving the space where he had been communicating with Laura and rapidly heading

backwards. Something in the physical was jolting him back to his body. The blur of everything

flowing past him at near light speed gave Troy motion sickness and when he found himself

restored completely to his body, his jaw ached, his cheek stung and he was fighting a horriblenausea. Somebody was shaking him, and calling his name. When he opened his eyes, a very

frightened-looking Matt was standing over him, grasping his arm with one hand and preparing to

strike him again with the other. Troy had never seen his friend in such a panic before.

Bathroom! Troy gasped, and Marcia pointed at the door, explaining it was one shared

by the floor, down the hall.

He dragged himself awkwardly out of her room closely followed by Matt. Troy barely

made it in time, spewing the contents of his stomach into the porcelain bowl with such force that

some of it spattered back at him. When he stopped retching, he collapsed onto the dirty floor,

shivering and moaning. He felt Matts hand on his shoulder. It rested there until Troy succeeded

in pulling himself together and sat up. Matt was crouched beside him, staring at him with

concerned eyes.

Im really sorry I had to hit you like that, but that was just crazy. It was like you werent

even there anymore, man. I almost thought you were dead. I have to ask where the fuck did

you go? You scared the shit out of me. You scared the shit out of all of us.

Troy had a hard time answering. He wanted to cry, to yell at Matt for pulling him away

before he could find out more about this Laura, to crawl into a corner and cover his ears and

close his eyes in hopes that this would all go away. He just shook his head, bewildered andoverwhelmed.

Are you okay in there? Is there anything we can do?

It was Marcia yelling through the door. The girls were worried because of the strange

scene in Marcias room and Troys rapid departure. They would probably chock it up to too

much alcohol for someone who couldnt hold his liquor, but Troy and Matt knew otherwise.


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There wouldnt be any going back to the pleasant socializing in hopes of maybe getting lucky.

The mood had been spoiled, and to make matters worse, Troys slight shake had worsened into a

constant tremble.

Get me home, he begged Matt, his insides still churning and his face flushed. The

effects of the alcohol and Matts violence aside, he felt as though he had just run a marathon.Please, I need to go home.

Matt didnt fail him. He nodded and gave Troys shoulder a squeeze.

Sorry, girls, but it looks like my buddy is done. Were going to have to call it a night,

Matt called to them through the door.

Alright, Patty replied, with obvious disappointment. Call me tomorrow?

Will do.

Matt waited until the girls were gone and then helped Troy to his feet. Troy could barely

stand, and leaned heavily against his friend. His heart fluttered rapidly in his chest like it was

making up for lost time.

Man, you are in rough shape, Matt observed. Come on, lets grab a cab and get you

back to your place.

Matt offered cheerful small talk all the way there, but Troy remembered none of what

was said as he finally collapsed into his bed.

Instead, Troy was haunted by thoughts of a scared little girl by the name of Laura.

intangible - chapter 2

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