hope virgo “recovery is possible' - hr vision event · hope virgo “recovery is...
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Hope Virgo “Recovery is possible"
Author of Stand Tall Little Girl & Ambassador for the Shaw Mind
Foundation
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Start of story Born on 8 May 1990 Didn’t have a very hard upbringing – but I did always struggle with emotions Mum looked at me and what get this cold hearted girl with no emotion staring back I was one of 5 Messy family life Sexual Abuse when I was 12 Quite rebellious throughout my teens My way of coping was to stop eating and to exercise This gave me value – made me feel something whilst at the same time helping me to switch off from everything that was going on around me.
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Hid for 4 years Hit rock bottom A year living in hospital – this was one of the hardest years of my life My weight seemed to go up so quickly and I felt completely trapped – I was frustrated as I didn't’t know when the mental part of me was going to catch up
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University Managed well – survived first year
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Life after Uni – travelling Running Career
Professional life in recovery
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Professional life in recovery There are a few main issues that I have with my professional working life and the impact if has on my mental health: Knowing what to wear Events where food is involved Traveling with work and fitting in exercise: Flexibility around work: i.e. going on medication have side effects but still have to get in on time and people might not want to say – I knew I didn’t. So managing a condition which isn’t chronic so you still have good and bad days Feeling valued at work: spend most of your time at work if you aren’t valued that it might have a huge negative impact for example for me if work isn’t valung me I may fall in to my old habits of calorie counting and exercising too much as I know
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Now 10 years on I have managed my recovery well all up until last year when my Grandma passed away. She had had dementia for about six years and at this point barely recognised me. It didn’t matter though as I knew when I was with her she was having a good time. All up until I had this terrible visit with her in a few days after she had moved in to a care home. Just a few days later she passed away. I was consumed with so much guilt and I felt completely trapped by it. For the first time in 9 years my anorexia crept back in. Anorexia reassured me and made me feel complete again and helped me feel more in control again after losing my Grandma. That is where the battle began. The voices back in my head and I felt completely trapped. I was scared that I was going to get sick again and I didn’t know what to do but at the same time this anorexic voice, the skipping of meals, exercising made me feel complete. There was part of me who knew what I was doing so I ended up referring myself to the Mental Health hospital near where I live. I had an initial appointment only to be told I was not thin enough to get support. A few weeks later the battle hadn’t got any easy and I didn’t know what to do. I walked home down the river from Tower Hill to Waterloo. One of my favourite walks in London. The whole way there I was thinking about life. Thinking about what was important to me. The sweat slowly seeping down my back. I was tired and fed up that this battle had come back. I sat on the platform for ages at Waterloo contemplating what to do. I imagined how much better life would be for everyone if I threw myself in front of a train. I sat there for hours not entirely sure what stopped me but something did. And it was the next day I decided I had a decision to make. I could either try and get better, I could start talking, start eating or kill myself. The hardest thing with my recovery was people not understanding the extent of anorexia. The fact that just because someone looks a healthy weight doesn’t mean they are okay. It is appalling that we live in a society where people judge eating disorders on weight. I could have easily lost all that weight, hit crisis or killed myself. I am lucky that I had that care when I was younger, and I had people around me to talk to but come on – for those people who don’t have that network of support what are they expected to do?
Anorexia affects millions of people each year, the majority of them teenagers, and 20% of sufferers die prematurely because of it.
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That was my experience – really tough and I do still manage it but I am absolutely committed and passionate to using my story to help highlight the difficulties that worked for me in my recovery. I have been doing this in a number of ways: Written a book Sharing my story in schools to young people to show recovery is possible and that talking helps. And to teachers and parents to educate them on what they are doing to help others Recognized spokesperson in the media Using social media in a positive way to creating online discussions around eating disorders and mental health recovery Sharing my story to create practical changes to create a positive environment for businesses
• 1 in 4 people have a mental illness
• Better mental health support in the workplace can save UK businesses up to £8 billion per year
• 350 millions people worldwide have depression
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1 in 4 people have a mental illness - but mental health problems can affect any of us – directly or otherwise. And without support from those around us, we can lose what we care about most
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My work now – schools, organisations, Alz Soc work
What you can do as an organisation to support people with their mental wellbeing? • Yammer group / online platform
• Set up a cross directorate working group
• Breakfast sessions
• Time to change pledge
• Utilise your internal comms team – top tips
• Make it clear where people need to go to for support
• Anonymous webinars for people o ask questions
• Senior leadership representation
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What you can do as an organisation to support people with their mental wellbeing? Yammer group Breakfast sessions Time to change pledge Utilise your internal comms team – top tips Make it clear where people need to go to for support Annoymonous webinars for people o ask questions Ensure that managers have the resources and education to spot mental health, have progressive conversations without feeling like they have to act as counsellors (as this is dangerous) Ensure that workplace / reasonable adjustment processes take into account mental health and that what works for one person won’t work for the next person – it starts with a conversation and providing managers with the tools to have that conversation Encourage senior leaders to show vulnerability by talking about their own mental health (both positive and negative) Don’t forget that we all experience ups and downs in life and although these are not always classified as a mental illness they are still relevant to the conversation Ensure occupational health lines are available but not seen as the only answer
What keeps me well • Exercise
• Knowing my triggers
• Making meal times fun /
enjoyable
• Avoiding dieting magazines
• Talking about how I feel
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What keeps me well Exercise Knowing my triggers Making meal times fun / enjoyable Avoiding dieting magazines Talking about how I feel
