Hope in Action Ending Poverty through Systemic

Change

Developing Relationships & Supporting Change

© 2013, National Council of the United States Society of St. Vincent de Paul, Inc. This copyright covers all materials in this presentation except where otherwise noted.

Listen carefully to needs and hopes

Involve the individual directly in needs assessment and goal setting

Educate, train, and encourage spiritual well being

Build self-confidence in the participant

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Vincentian Family – Hope in Action: People-Oriented Strategies

“If you have come to help me, you

can go home again. But if you see my struggles as a part of your

own survival, then perhaps we can work together.”

–Lila Watson, an Aboriginal Woman

from Australia

© aha! Process, Inc.

Accept others as they are

Affirm their individuality

Be objective

Building Relationships

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Our love of God – who we cannot see – must be expressed by our love of neighbor – who we can see

Only in relationship can love manifest itself

Mankind was made for relationships

“Teacher, which commandment is the greatest? He said: “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. The whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.” (Matthew: 22: 36-40)Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Monitor unspoken language (yours)

Have a positive outlook

Have patience & don’t get discouraged

Developing Relationships

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

What lens do we use?

What do we see?

Appearance

Situation/Context

Motivation

Actions

No significant learning occurs

without a significant

relationship.

–Dr. James Comer

© aha! Process, Inc.

Relationships take time to develop

Relationships are built on trust

Politics & Religion vs. Advocacy & Beliefs

Healthy Relationships

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Learn about their culture

Take a stand against their oppression

Relationships with people of different cultural backgrounds

Adapted from The Community Toolbox http://ctb.ku.edu

Adapted from The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. (1989). Stephen Covey.

Deposits WithdrawalsSeeking first to understand Seeking first to be understood

Keeping promises Breaking promisesKindness, courtesies Unkindness, discourtesiesClarifying expectations Violating expectationsLoyalty to the absent Disloyalty, duplicityApologies Pride, conceit, arroganceOpen to feedback Rejecting feedback

Creating Relationships

Deposits made to individuals in poverty

Withdrawals made from individuals in poverty

Appreciation for humor and entertainment provided by the individual

Put-downs or sarcasm about the humor or the individual

Acceptance of what the individual cannot say about a person or situation

Insistence and demands for full explanation of person or situation

Respect for the demands and priorities of relationships

Insistence on the middle class view of relationships

Using the adult voice Using the parent voice

Assisting with goal setting Telling the individual his/her goals

Identifying options related to available resources

Making judgments on value and availability of resources

Understanding the importance of personal freedom, speech, and personality

Assigning pejorative character traits to the individual

Creating Relationships with people in poverty

© aha! Process, Inc.

Pay attention to them – check in regularly

Communicate openly Appreciate each other Extend yourself Challenge each other to do better Back each other when things get tough

Maintaining Relationships

Adapted from The Community Toolbox http://ctb.ku.edu

Reflect what you hear:

It sounds like …It seems like …

So you think …You feel …

Your interpretation is only a guess and may not match what was actually meant.

Questions can be roadblocks. Instead of asking questions, compare and contrast two statements to encourage the person to continue clarifying.

Listening Skills

© aha! Process, Inc.

Take time to listen to each other Put yourself in their shoes Look at what’s true about what they are

saying Separate emotions from reality Continue to appreciate and respect each

other Speak from your heart Don’t give up on your principles Hang in there…stay positive, even when

they are not

When Relationships Get Messy Adapted from The Community

Toolbox http://ctb.ku.edu

Drama Triangle: Victims place blame on

Persecutors Victims need Rescuers to

solve problems for them

Empowerment Triangle: Creators are outcome-

oriented, focused on long term goals

Challengers force clarification of our goals

Coaches ask questions to help individual make informed choices

The Empowerment Dynamic

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Change Is Hard

“The healthier you are psychologically, or the less you may seem to need to change, the more you can change.”

–Richard Farson

“The need to act overwhelms any willingness people have to learn.”

–Peter Schwartz

© aha! Process, Inc.

Change – it’s not easy – understand potential barriers

Stages of change

Motivation – theory & advice

Encouraging Change

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Barriers to Change:Generated by Poverty

• Crisis living / “Tyranny of the Moment”

• Lack of “resources”

• Not knowing how to plan

• Co-existing problems

• Not knowing hidden rules of economic class

• Giving up self-image / identity is threatening © aha! Process, Inc.

Resistance to change by family & friends

Diminished social capital

The need to earn the respect of one’s peers

Not knowing the hidden rules of economic class

Barriers to Change:Family and Social Network

© aha! Process, Inc.

Clients perceived only as “needy”

Talents, skills, gifts, and abilities to solve community problems unrecognized

Program theory / design based on middle class mindset

Organizational change difficult

Barriers to Change:Agencies and Organizations

© aha! Process, Inc.

Change – it’s not easy – understand potential barriers

Stages of change

Motivation – theory & advice

Encouraging Change

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Stages of Change

Pre-Contemplation

Contemplation

Preparation

Action

Maintenance/Relapse

© aha! Process, Inc.

Pre-Contemplation

Unconcerned about problems Ignorant of possible solutions “If I close my eyes, it will go away”

“I’m not even thinking about change. I don’t know how. I’m not willing.”

© aha! Process, Inc.

Contemplation

Ambivalent - open to change, but lacks commitment

Ambivalence is a natural reaction to change

When in doubt, “put it off”

“I’m worried, and I’m considering change, but I’m not sold on it yet.”

© aha! Process, Inc.

Contemplation (continued)

The challenge:

- Help people through ambivalence

- Offer new ways of thinking

- Offer new mental models

© aha! Process, Inc.

Preparation

Intention to change in the future Begins to make small changes “Yes, but … ” phase Fear of failure, fear of success The challenge:

- Identify what is important to the individual- Assist in the development of a plan

“I’m going to change, and I’m figuring out how to do it.”

© aha! Process, Inc.

Action – Beginning the Journey

Plan is executed Thinking has changed

The challenge:- Build their belief that this can be done- Encourage them that they have the skills and

motivation to change

“I’m actually doing it, but things are shaky.”

© aha! Process, Inc.

Maintenance/Relapse

Change continues

Fits, starts, and plateaus

The challenge:– To prevent relapse– To minimize the effect of relapse– To be persistent in support and encouragement

“I’ve done it, and I’m now working on keeping it.”

© aha! Process, Inc.

Change – it’s not easy – understand potential barriers

Stages of change

Motivation – theory & advice

Encouraging Change

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Motivational Approaches

Belief that those in poverty can be controlled and are needy

Assumes that they lack knowledge about the need to change

Assumes that education will convince them to change

Belief that people are the solution, have skills to care for themselves

People know problems exist but sometimes lack motivation to change

Education (abstract representation of concrete), new choices

FIX-IT APPROACH MOTIVATIONAL APPROACH

© aha! Process, Inc.

Motivational Approaches(continued)

Those in poverty need advice to change

Sanctions and monitoring will keep them on track

Metaphor: machine

People will internalize and own the need to change

Persistence, insistence, and support will help people maintain the changes they make

Metaphor: gardener

FIX-IT APPROACH MOTIVATIONAL APPROACH

© aha! Process, Inc.

Motivation

GOAL: The participant makes the

argument for change, not the mentors.

STRATEGY: Help them to understand the

degree of discrepancy between the current behavior and the future story. © aha! Process, Inc.

What the Abstract Consists of:

Theory of Change from “Getting Ahead”

• Detachment• Objectivity• Analysis• Thinking• New ideas• New information• Education• Plans• Support

“Concrete”

35

We were made by God for relationships…it’s how we live out our love for God

We need to be like Jesus: accepting and nonjudgmental

Developing a significant relationship of mutual respect with someone in poverty will require us to be flexible and adapt to our differences

Summary

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change

Be aware of the barriers to escaping poverty

Understand the Stages of Change

Encourage, Coach, Empower

Key Points

Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change