friends first match newsletter - summer 2011
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F R I E N D S F I R S T
SPOTLIGHT ON… Shirley & Rebecca
In the professional industry, participants have an opportunity to give presentations on a daily basis. Presentations include appearances in small groups, large groups, or a more intimate setting to your superiors.
At some point this process may become easy for those preparing to give speeches, or persuade a client with their special sales pitch. But what impact does a child have when he/she is telling their story in front of a large crowd? If an adult had to read literature and attend a networking event to recruit clients, what difference would it make to read a report versus hearing it from a child who conveys that same message? The answer could be different depending on how people absorb information, whether it is visual, reading, or experiencing it first hand. A few months ago, one of our Friends First matches presented in front of the Mercy Home for Boys and Girls Junior Board. The Junior Board is a team of professionals who collaborate to spread the message to different communities on the work that Mercy Home for Boys and Girls does all over the community. While picking up the mentee, Shirley, I noticed how anxious she was while preparing to present to the Junior Board about her match with Rebecca. Shirley brought a scrapbook, her grandmother, and her excitement. When her name was called to begin her presentation, her smile went away and her eye contact with people decreased. It was a moment when many of us in the audience wanted to get up, help her out and reassure her that everything was going to be OK. Her mentor, Rebecca, lead the initial introduction on how long they’ve been matched and the types of activities they’ve taken part in over the year. As each second and minute went by, Shirley began making small comments, elaborating on their outings and sharing their story. Some comments were two or three word answers which increased in excitement, followed by short pauses. Shirley began smiling more, talking about her match and sharing how fun her mentor is, all while flipping through her scrapbook.
People in the audience laughed, thought their relationship was “cute”, and began asking them questions. By this point, Shirley was on a roll and enjoyed answering questions and coming up with jokes. In the end, the experience of presenting to a complete group of strangers turned out to be amazing for Shirley. Her grandmother was very happy and appreciative for Shirley’s opportunity to share her match story while having a great mentor by her side. To learn about the Friends First program, the Junior Board could easily have read literature or watched a video. But to hear firsthand from Shirley and Rebecca about their match was magical. Members of the Junior Board witnessed how in less than ten minutes, with the support and leadership of a mentor, things can quickly change for the better. The fact that Shirley and Rebecca share a great relationship was very evident and in just 10 minutes, they demonstrated the importance of building the following Developmental Assets:
Having adult relationships and an adult role model
Community values
Service to others
Creative Activities, evidenced by their match outings scrapbook
Lots of caring towards her mentor
Integrity by expressing how mentoring is powerful and important in a youth’s life
Planning and decision making by bringing her scrapbook, and practicing singing and dancing before the presentation.
Cultural competence by describing each other’s culture, upbringing, likes, and dislikes by food, music, or norms.
And most importantly Personal Power, High Self-Esteem, Sense of Purpose, and Positive View of the future.
Shirley and Rebecca remind me of why I enjoy working with matches. When mentors give a little of their time, “coolness”, and ongoing dedication, they make a big difference in the lives of kids. All youth have opinions and ideas that can be truly valuable in the professional world. For Rebecca and Shirley, they showed all of us that day how a special seed can be planted by adults who care for and nurture the next generation of professional leaders. ~ Alberto Paguada
Friends First is a program of Mercy Home for Boys & Girls
www.mercyhome.org
Summer 2011
Mercy Home Records Another First
The Friends First program is proud to say that we now have a mentee that has become a mentor. It was not necessarily in
Michael’s plan to become a mentor when he was first matched in Friends First over twelve years ago. He had his
problems. His mother was disabled and his father was not involved in his life. Like most children, he had difficulties in
school and was susceptible to the vagaries of the streets. The bonding between Michael and his mentor, Joe, was not
immediate. They went through their disagreements and adjustments, and, at times it seemed like the match would end.
The teenage years were a time of unrest and ambivalence for Michael, but his volunteer held firm to his belief that every
child has a right to a better life.
Now, as they look back over their match and see how special it was, Michael and Joe both feel that they did not do
anything unusual. They enjoyed going to museums, walking on the shore, having an occasional piece of pizza, or just
hanging out and talking about life in general. They had their share of laughs and disappointments and they both mention
that the moments they remember the most are centered on the personal events and conversations.
Michael was pushed by his mentor to be a good student and do his homework regularly. He was not always enthusiastic
about doing his work in school, but he was able to complete high school and eventually complete his college degree.
When he saw his country at war, he joined the Marine Corps and is now a veteran of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars.
After leaving active duty, Michael came back to Mercy Home for Boys and Girls and asked to be a mentor through
Friends First. He felt it was his duty to return the good modeling he received from his mentor. He laughs a little when he
visits with his MSR and speaks of his mentee. He realizes that role modeling is not always easy and the problems that he
faced as a youth are now seen in the young man he visits on the weekend. He continues to have a great deal of respect for
the mentor of his childhood. ~ Br. Paul McDonough
Mary Ann’s Moment
Community Service/Youth as Resources Are you active in your community? One sure way to make a difference
where you live is to participate in a neighborhood activity, event, project or
day of service. No matter what your interest or how big or small you care to
go, it still makes a difference to your community. Maybe you like animals
and can volunteer at a local shelter. If you like to play in the park, find out
how you may participate in a volunteer clean up day through the Chicago
Park District or a community center. Many of them also offer free classes to
satisfy a variety of interests where you can be support these programs by
participating while also making new friends.
Perhaps you desire to help others and would be able to visit a nearby
nursing home to provide companionship for an elder who could use a
friend. Take part in a beautification or art project. Whether you stick with
your favorite interests or try something new, you can make a difference in
the lives of those around you just by exploring your community.
Many of Chicago's neighborhoods have websites with event calendars
where you can find fun ways to support your community. If you do not
have access to a computer, your local library will have computers you can
use to search for fun events near you. So get out there and find your fun! ~Mary Ann Pilet
Welcome New Matches!
We are pleased to welcome these new
matches and wish them all the best as they
start an exciting year together:
Anthony W. & TyJuan S….. 3/16
Stephanie L. & Kaylin N….. 4/21
Justin G. & Jeremiah T…… 4/28
Sandy G. & Crystal M……. 5/04
Ali N. & Jessica Z…………. 5/28
Mike B. & Juan N………….. 6/02
Julie F. & Lizbeth A………...6/05
One-Time Opportunities Dinner at Living Room Café Fulton Flower & Vegetable Garden Work Day
Bingo Fun With Seniors
National Multiple Sclerosis Society Slugfest Softball Tournament
St. Columbanus Food Pantry
Where Inspiration Café: 4554 N. Broadway St #207
When Wednesday, July 13, 2001
4:30 to 7:00 p.m.
What Volunteers make dinner and serve it café
style in this fun restaurant atmosphere for
people experiencing homelessness.
Contact Toni Spencer, 773-878-0981
Where Sheridan and Leland CHA
When Tuesday, July 26 6:45 to 8:00 p.m.
What Play bingo with senior Chicago Housing Authority residents.
Contact Sign up at: http://www.chicagocares.org/HOC__Volunteer_Opportunity_Details_Page?
startURL=HOC__Volunteer_Opportunity_Details_Page%3FId=a0CA0000008edzgMAAA@A&id=a0CA0000008edzgMAA
Where Mt. Greenwood Park, Chicago, IL 60655
When Saturday, August 13th 6 a.m. to 7 p.m.
What Volunteers help with set-up, food service, registration, field monitoring, the home run derby, and clean-up.
Contact Elle Ullum at [email protected] or 312-423-1172
Where 331 E. 71st St. Chicago, IL 60619
When Saturday, August 13th
What Volunteers help to organize, sort and package food for distribution on pantry days.
Contact Patricia Lombardo, 773-224-1022
Summer Volunteer Opportunities
Summer is a great time to get out in the community to volunteer! Many organizations are in need of volunteers for one-
time events or ongoing assistance. Below is a list of opportunities to fit everyone’s interests and schedule. ~ Amanda Sneed
Ongoing Volunteer Opportunities Anti-Cruelty Society’s Teen Volunteer Program 510 N. La Salle St. Contact Erin Kelly, [email protected] Pet lovers ages 11 to 17 can work with the staff doing animal care, training and first aid. Friends of the Chicago River, ages 6 and up. 312-939-0490 www.chicagoriver.org Volunteer at river cleanup days and assist with canoe and kayak events like the group’s annual Chicago River Flatwater Classic. VITAS Hospice Care 312-997-7200 www.vitas.com VITAS is looking for kind and caring people to help terminally ill patients and their families. Friendly visits, simple errands, providing a listening ear and the gift of friendship at a crucial time can make a real difference in another person’s life. And yours too! VITAS Volunteer orientation is provided free of charge to help you learn the skills required to be an outstanding hospice volunteer. Time and dates are ongoing and flexible.
Where 4427-31 West Fulton Street
When Saturday, July 16, 2011
9:30 am to 12:00 p.m.
What Help tend to the gardens by planting, weeding
and harvesting vegetables that will feed low
income individuals and families.
Contact RSVP to Julie Samuels via e-mail or by phone
at 312-863-6256
Artists of the Wall…
Every year in June there is an event along the lake front in the Rogers Park neighborhood called the Artists of the Wall
Festival. Individuals, families or groups can pay a fee to paint one of the designated spaces along the 600 foot mural at
Loyola Park Beach (paint can also be purchased). The mural is functional, too, as it is a concrete bench facing the lake
front that will delight, amuse and enrich the lives of those who sit upon it for an entire year until it is painted over again
giving the rest of us budding artists an opportunity to express our love of community and add beauty to the
neighborhood. This event can be found at www.rogerspark.com but it is posted for a brief time before the event if you
wish to participate, so check early and often. This year the Artists of the Wall Festival is on Saturday and Sunday, June
18th & 19th from 9 a.m. until dusk. Registration is now closed, but Mercy Home for Boys & Girls’ Friends First
Mentoring Program has a space, so watch for the upcoming photos of our experience. ~ Mary Ann Pilet
Kids in Service Friends First matches went to the Greater Chicago Food Depository
on April 16th for a day of service. Mentor Marissa and mentee
Maria had a great time volunteering and even donated canned goods
to the Food Depository for hungry families.
Happy Anniversary!
July
Colleen H. & Mariyah C…... 7/13
Nathaniel P. & Robert R…... 7/17
Beth B. & Denira C………… 7/27
August
Tom K. & Godofredo N……. 8/04
Chad H. & Jasean P……….. 8/05
Dean K. & Corey W………... 8/05
Les J. & Joey G…………….. 8/15
Kara C. & Jasmine T………. 8/31
September
Stephanie M. & Daphne P… 9/08
Heidi D. & Angelic B………. 9/13
Bree M. & Natjaxi C……….. 9/28
We apologize if we have missed
your birthday. Please let us know
so we can add it to our calendar.
Friends First Focus
Community Service / Youth as Resources The Search Institute (www.search-institute.org)
identifies the importance of giving youth useful
roles and providing service to the community.
Consider how you can include young people when
making decisions, planning events and discussing
community issues. Young people have a lot to
offer and to learn from by being involved. Find
out their passions and concerns and then look for
ways that these can be addressed or for
opportunities for young people to take action.
Friends First Fun! Friends First matches took part in a day of service
at the Greater Chicago Food Depository in April.
Five matches and two staff members attended the
event and assisted in repackaging cereal for
emergency food kits for families. This was a great
event for youth to do service while learning more
about hunger and poverty.
We recently hosted a family day here at Mercy
Home to provide Friends First families with
summer ideas and opportunities for our youth.
The day included yoga, information about free
family events in Chicago, camp registration, ideas
for healthy snacks and a springtime party. Friends
First wishes everyone a safe, healthy and happy
summer!
Friends First News Our own Br. Paul McDonough threw out the first
pitch at the Cubs Game in April. He was
introduced as “Mercy Home for Boys and Girls,
Br. Paul McDonough.” Before the beginning of
the game, Br. Paul walked out to the mount, tipped
his hat and pitched all the way to the plate, with a
little bounce just before. Friends First is very
proud to have such a celebrity in our midst. ~ Mary Quinn
Friends First Tidbits Look for volunteer opportunities for
the young people in your life by
visiting:
www.chicagosfoodbank.org
www.chicagocares.org
www.volunteermatch.org
Happy Birthday!!
July
Jeremiah T………………… 7/12
Carlos C. ………………….. 7/29
Jordan D…………………... 7/30
Elijah M…………………… 7/31
August
Crystal M………………….. 8/01
Godofredo N………………. 8/10
Monique W………………... 8/15
Desiree C……………………8/17
Mariyah C…………………. 8/17
Nancy V……………………. 8/18
Jabree G…………………… 8/29
Dejah J…………………….. 8/31
Sept
David M……………………. 9/01
Joey G……………………… 9/13
Shirley W………………….. 9/13
We apologize if we have missed your birthday. Please
let us know so we can add it to our calendar.
Be of Service...
From the Diary of Anne Frank:
“Give of yourself, give as much as you can!
And you can always give something, even if
it is only kindness! If everyone were to do
this, then there would be much more justice
and love in the world. “
“Give and you shall receive, much more
than you would have ever thought possible.
Give, give again and again, and don’t lose
courage, keep it up and go on giving! No
one has ever become poor by giving.”
We love your match stories so please keep
sharing them with us!
Thoughts that Make You Go “Hmmm?”
F R I E N D S F I R S T A newsletter dedicated to building and supporting the Friends First community of Mercy Home for Boys & Girls. For more information, please call (312) 738-7552 or visit www.mercyhome.org.
F R I E N D S F I R S T
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“Our inner strengths, experiences, and truths cannot be lost, destroyed, or taken away. Every person has an
inborn worth and can contribute to the human community. We all can treat one another with dignity and respect,
provide opportunities to grow toward our fullest lives and help one another discover and develop our unique gifts.
We each deserve this and we all can extend it to others.” “Responsibility does not only lie with the leaders of our
countries or with those who have been appointed or elected to do a particular job. It lies with each of us
individually. Peace, for example, starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with
those around us. When our community is in a state of peace, it can share that peace with neighboring communities,
and so on.” ~ Dalai Lama
“When I help, I am aware of my strength and of others’ weaknesses…Fixing is a form of judgment. It implies
something is broken and creates a distance, a disconnection. We can only serve that which we are profoundly
connected to.” ~ Sam Daley-Harris
“If you have come to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is bound
up with mine, then let us work together.” ~ An aboriginal Australian woman
“I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy
are those who will have sought and found how to serve.” ~ Albert Schweitzer