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Family Spotlighta l o c a l f a m i l y g u i d e

Winter/Spring 2011

Mom wears the whistle Amy Hofmann of Los Altoscoaches three sons in sports

Also inside:• Teaching manners• Foods all families should learn to cook

A Los Altos Town Crier Publication

| Family Spotlight | February 16, 2011

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Family Spotlight | February 16, 2011 |


The Los Altos Town Crier138 Main Street, Los Altos, CA 94022

(650) 948-9000www.latc.com

Editor BruceBarton

MagazineEditor PeteBorello

Designer MaryWatanabe

Writers SarahRavani

CourtenayC.Corrigan

GraceAcosta

MeganRowe

Dr.KenSchweifler

CopyEditors JoanGarvin

ColleenSchick

SalesDirector KathyLera

SalesStaff ElaineClark

JaniceFabella

DawnPankonen

AdServicesDirector ChrisRedden

ProductionStaff JanineO’Neill

MaryWatanabe

MarilynWinans

Publisher PaulNyberg

AssociatePublisher HowardBischoff

Cover photo by Elliott Burr/Town Crier

Magazine Staff SSSS

Circulation 16,500. Mailed directly to households in Los Altos, Los Altos Hills and selected areas of Mountain View. Hundreds of subscribers receive the Town Crier in neighboring communi-ties as well as out-of-state. The Town Crier can be purchased at newsstands in Los Altos, Los Altos Hills, Palo Alto and Mountain View.

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© Los Altos Town Crier Company, Inc. 2011.All Rights Reserved.

m a g a z i n em a g a z i n e

family spotlightfamily spotlightA coach for all seasons Los Altos mom Amy Hofmann coaches her sons in basketball, baseball and football.

Page 5

Manners matter In her Mixing It Up column, Los Altos Hills resident Courtenay C. Corrigan explains the importance of teach-ing manners to her boys.

Page 10

Motherhood In her No Shoes, Please column, Grace Acosta of Los Altos discusses how her role as a mother has changed since her children went off to college.

Page 16

Cooking basics Food writer Megan Rowe details the five foods all fam-ilies should learn how to cook – from roasted vegetables to cookies.

Page 18

Wisdom about teeth In his Dental Health column, Ken Schweifler, D.D.S., explains how parents’ attitude toward dental care will be transmitted to their children.

Page 20


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COACH

By Sarah RavaniSpecial to the Town Crier

Amy Hofmann has found a great way to connect with her three sons. Like many young

boys, her children love sports. So the Los Altos resident coaches them. She’s coached their football, basket-ball and baseball teams. “The best way to communicate with boys is to do something with them that they are interested in,” said Hofmann, whose sons range in age from 7 to 11. Having a common interest has cre-ated a closer bond between mom and sons, according to Hofmann. She said the boys are more willing to confide in her when they are playing sports or watching games as a family.

Continued on Page 6

eLLIoTT bURR/TowN CRIeR

Amy Hofmann coaches her YMCA basketball team, from left, son Grady Hofmann, Cyrus Gaylord and Christian Yarwood during a recent prac-tice.

Mom has a ball coachingAmy Hofmann finds common ground with three sons


“we can watch football together and talk about it in ways that we were never able to before I was a coach,” Hofmann said. “It’s a different level of bonding we have.” Hofmann began her coaching career in baseball, run-ning the T-ball team her youngest son, Grady, played on three years ago. The past two years she coached Santa Rita School’s flag football b team, which included sons baylor and Hayden. Hofmann is currently coaching two basketball teams: Grady’s YMCA team and Hayden’s Na-tional Junior basketball squad. In addition to receiving help and support from other parents, Hofmann said she learned about the various sports online and by observing other teams in action. “I keep a book from all the different sports I’ve coached, and I collect all the advice and suggestions peo-ple give me,” she said. “I usually learn it with my boys. I want to teach them through example.” More importantly, Hofmann said she has taught the children on her teams important life skills, including good sportsmanship and how to encourage others. “All those things I do as a mom, I feel like I bring to the court and the field,” she said. Hofmann tries to use different sports analogies to teach the children about real-life situations. That includes responsibility, according to wayne Smith, Hofmann’s assistant coach for flag football at

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COACHContinued from Page 5


Hofmann gathers her basketball team for a talk dur-ing a practice at Egan Junior High School.


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COACHSanta Rita. He recalled a bullying in-cident at the elementary school that had been brought to Hofmann’s at-tention, involving a few boys on her team. At practice, Hofmann stressed the importance of being positive rep-resentatives for their school and ex-pected the boys to take responsibility for their actions. “She told the boys they had to apologize to everyone, to the school,” Smith said. “what a good learning experience.” Hofmann said she tries to motivate her players by highlighting something that each one of them is good at. “I don’t focus on what the child is not good at – they know what they have to work on. but I find that a lot of kids don’t know what they’re good at – what makes them unique and au-thentic,” Hofmann said. “They are so passionate about the sport, and I just try to bring that to their attention.” elisa Steele said her 9-year-old son, eddie, a member of the basketball

Continued on Page 8


Hofmann demonstrates how to shoot a basketball. She has gathered infor-mation on coaching from books and the Internet.


team Hofmann coached last season, learned the impor-tance of teamwork and how to be proud of himself as an individual. Hofmann’s coaching methods may have appeared spontaneous at times, but Steele said Hofmann knew what she wanted the team to accomplish through their practices and games. During one basketball game, Steele recalls Hofmann's telling her team that if every player scored a basket, she would take them all out for pizza after the game. “So, all the boys were thinking how they were going to get their shot, but also how they were going to help their teammates get their shots,” Steele said. “Down to the last minute, one more kid had to get a shot, and they were not going to let that kid miss the basket. They were on fire. They made it.” In addition to rewarding each child personally for his or her accomplishments, Hofmann sends an e-mail to the parents after each game recognizing every player on the squad for a personal skill, Smith said. “She is competitive in a sweet way, and she’s good with the kids,” Smith said. “They adore her.” Growing up, Hofmann played a variety of sports in elementary school, including volleyball and softball. but she never coached anything until her sons got involved with athletics.

COACH

Continued from Page 7

CoURTeSY oF AMY HoFMANN

Hofmann and her assistant coach, Wayne Smith, right, talk to their Santa Rita School flag football team during a break in the action. Below, Hofmann demonstrates how to pass a basketball.


COACH before she coached, Hofmann per-formed other team duties. She orga-nized carpools, made sure the players had snacks and helped manage prac-tices. Hofmann said it’s easy to become a coach because of the many resourc-es available on the Internet and at the library. “I thought maybe dads would not want a mom to coach, but everyone has been so supportive and they’ve helped me out,” said Hofmann, whose husband, Rusty, has been one of her assistant coaches for basketball. “I’m actually shocked at how much I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it.” And parents like Steele enjoyed having Hofmann coach their children. “Amy just creates an environment of camaraderie,” Steele said. “The parents had a great experience, too. As parents, we really want to rally around Amy and help her be success-ful. Amy did a great job being the coach, and she can do anything else she sets her mind to.” ◆

CoURTeSY oF AMY HoFMANN

Hofmann has coached her three sons – from left, Grady, Baylor and Hayden – in flag football at Santa Rita School.


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By Courtenay C. Corrigan

On a trip to South Carolina several years ago, I wit-nessed two young boys stand

aside to let their mother enter a store first as one held the door. I swooned.

As the mother of three young sons, this gentlemanly display of manners gave me hope – and a renewed commitment to impart to my boys such polite, simple and charm-ing acts of courtesy. why should Southern manners only be expected below the Mason-Dixon Line? Like most parents, as soon as our children could talk, we began

mAnnerS


Courtenay C. Corrigan watches son William place food on the table at their Los Altos Hills home.

Yes, please: A mother’s guide to manners

Mixing It Up


teaching “pleases” and “thank yous.” but reinforcing social graces requires constant vigilance and modeling the desired behavior. It’s an ongoing process, with little victories as well as setbacks. when it came time to plan and build our own home, we put a lot of thought into each precious square foot. our architect told us that many modern families were forgoing the traditional living room in their new homes. we decided, however, that we could not only use the formal space for entertaining, but also for differentiating behavioral expectations where the children are con-cerned. For instance, formal rooms require a higher standard of behavior and more formal manners, especially in the

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Corrigan makes sure William has everything in its proper place at the dinner table.

mAnnerS

Like most parents, as soon as our children could talk, we began teaching "pleases"

and "thank yous."


company of special guests. other rooms are designed for utility or casual living and allow for a more relaxed dynamic. Discerning such subtleties is a life skill. Using living-room for-malities in the playroom will invite ridicule from peers, just as surely as employing play-room antics in the living room is unlikely to get you invited back. Learning when and where behavior is expected and ap-propriate is just as important as learning the manners them-selves. This approach to manners makes it much easier for chil-dren to read social situations in public. At a sleepover with cous-ins, it is acceptable to lounge

mAnnerSContinued from Page 11


Corrigan says manners are especially important at mealtime – whether the fam-ily is eating at home, grandma's house or a restaurant.


around in the playroom and watch TV or play wii, but it’s not oK to plop down on Aunt Margaret’s living-room sofa and rest your feet on her cof-fee table. when invited to Grand-ma’s house, we use our fitting “Grandma manners,” espe-cially when her friends are there. These nuances are most important at mealtime. To prepare for dining out, we try to mix up where and how we eat at home. Like most new homes, we included a convenient kitchen counter with stools for less formal meals and an infor-mal breakfast table. we also have a dining room with all the pomp and circumstance, which we set for special occa-sions and holiday meals.

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mAnnerS


William is expected to raise his level of etiquette when the good china and silver come out for a more sophisticated meal.Continued on Page 14


when we leave the counter and prepare to eat at one of the tables, I enlist the older boys to help. They not only learn how to set a table, but they also mentally adjust to sitting down to a more formal meal. when the good china and silver come out, so do their dining-room manners. As the venue changes, so do the levels of etiquette. The ability to differentiate pays off when we walk into the Italian Deli for sandwiches or sit down at the white tablecloths at Chef Chu’s. because my sons are ma-turing and we travel a lot, they are frequently invited to dine with the grownups instead of eating at the kids’ table. we celebrate with privileges like having a champagne glass filled with sparkling apple

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mAnnerS


The Corrigan boys know where to place silverware, glassware and dishes when setting the table for a formal dinner.


mAnnerS


Corrigan said teaching her sons proper manners requires constant vigilance and modeling the desired behavior.

juice or ordering a Shirley Temple. I remind the boys that it’s an honor to be included. I understand that my children’s behavior reflects on my husband and me, but I also know that I am respon-sible to my children, not for my children. I grimaced when I thought of writing about man-ners. Nothing spells public-behavior doom more than being known as the woman who wrote that article about etiquette. Have mercy on me when you see me in public with any or all of my boys. but on a good day, when you get a “yes, sir” or a “ no, ma’am” out of one of them, I will be beaming with pride. I may even swoon. CourtenayC.CorriganisaLosAltosHillsresident.E-mailheratcourtenay@cccmixer.com. ◆


mOTHerHOOd

Leaving motherhood behindBy Grace Acosta

I will always be listed on two individual birth certificates that identify me as a mother, but I

don’t plan on remaining one the rest of my life. I realize this runs counter to our most common, endearing reflections of motherhood, expressed in senti-ments like, “I’ll always be your mother.” while technically correct, I don’t really swallow the idealism buried in this image. That sounds pretty icy, I know. My children hold an exceptional place in my heart. They are the only people I have known intimately all their lives, something I can’t say about anyone else. My older sister comes pretty close – we’re only 18 months apart – but other than that, my kids’ lives are the movies that have been playing in the cineplex of my mind from the day they were born. I’ve done all the things most mothers do, lasering in on children’s needs, desires, personalities, ambitions, emotions and calamities. I’ve been a little remiss on food

prep – I don’t think either of my kids has fond remembrances of particu-lar goodies or specialty dishes that entice recollections of home. How-ever, there’s no doubt that their best interest has been my nearly exclusive

concern for more than 20 years. but no one needs a mother forever. That would be counterproductive. what you really need is a lifelong, trusted adviser or stalwart friend, or a person who can relish special memories right along with you. A plus would be loyalty, dependability and wisdom from someone who’s been around the block a few times, after literally having done that while pushing you in a stroller. At a certain age, you don’t need a moral compass. You should have developed, or are continuing to develop, your own. You don’t need a housekeeper, cook or babysitter. You don’t need approval as much as you need self-confi-dence, or nurturing as much as you need self-awareness and self-sufficiency. You need many role models for different aspects of your life, but the best guide to your own existence will

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always be you. I have given my kids an actual time limit on our parent-child relationship – 26 years. The human brain continues to develop until a person is 25 years old, therefore, due to predictable lapses in judgment, they may require (gradually dwindling) sup-port until then. Getting used to having fully functioning gray matter might also take some time, so let’s tack on another year for good measure. This means that by age 26, my children live and die by their own swords – financial and otherwise. They will have to maneuver through life solo – not necessarily alone, but definitely as drivers of their own destinies. As we change and mature individually, our family does the same collectively. I won’t say that the transi-tions have always been smooth, but I’ve never lost sight of the endgame. being a mom is just phase one of the journey. If I’ve done that piece oK but can leave it behind gracefully, I think phase two and beyond will be grand. GraceAcostaisaLosAltosresident.E-mailheratthea-costafamily@sbcglobal.net.◆

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COOking

By Megan RoweSpecial to the Town Crier

There are certain foods all fami-lies should know how to cook. These cooking techniques are

simple, and they’re the foundation for many more advanced culinary forays. If you already know how to cook these things, teach your children. If they already know how to cook them, offer to teach your grandchildren, nieces and nephews or the youngsters down the street. If you don’t know how to cook them, ask a family mem-ber to teach you.

1. Make soup Many people overanalyze soup, but fundamentally it’s just liquid, solids and spices.

MeGAN Rowe/SPeCIAL To THe TowN CRIeR

Homemade cookies are not only a great treat, but they’re typically more nutritious and delicious than packaged ones.

Five things every family should know how to cook


Start with your flavor base – sauté onions in the bottom of the soup pot or toast some spices in a dry pan. Then add your liquid – vegetable stock, chicken stock, beef stock or even plain water. Then add your solids – diced vegetables and potatoes, leafy greens, soaked or canned beans, or anything else that sounds good. Let it simmer for a while, then blend for a smooth soup or leave chunky if you prefer, and add your toppings – cooked chicken or shrimp, melted cheese, croutons, etc. Soup is one of the easiest ways to learn how to cook from intuition, seasoning as you go, rather than following a recipe. once any meat is fully cooked, start tasting a spoonful at a time, adding whatever you think it needs – salt, pepper, chili powder, lemon juice, cream, etc. Then mix or blend well and taste again until you’re happy with the flavor. Soups keep well in the refrigerator or the freezer, and some soups improve in flavor over time. They’re great dishes to make in large quantities with family and friends and savor over the next few days, or to bring to sick or busy family members who would appreciate a home-cooked meal.

2. Roast vegetables Fundamentally, roasting aims to cook a dish at high heat for a short period of time so that the outside is crispy and the inside is soft. It can be used to make all sorts of tasty dishes, from french fries to the Thanksgiving turkey. Vegetables are particularly good when roasted, be-cause they tend to get sweeter as they cook. If you have finicky children, try chopping vegetables roughly, tossing with olive oil and salt and pepper, and roasting on a foil-lined baking sheet at 400 F for 10-30 minutes, depending on the density of what you’re roasting. This works well for single-vegetable pans (all potatoes, for example) as well as for mixes (tomatoes, eggplant, onions and zucchini). be sure to cut denser foods into smaller pieces so that ev-erything will cook at about the same speed. Roasted vegetables are versatile. Toss them into hot broth and blend for a great soup, or puree with a little water or cream for an easy, healthful pasta sauce.

3. Make pasta The stereotype of college kids living off ramen is more accurate than you might think. That’s because pasta and noodles are cheap and easy. but wouldn’t you rather your family eat real pasta than the microwaveable stuff? Start with the basics when teaching this skill: how to salt or oil the water; how to tell when the pasta is done; and how to make a simple sauce to accompany it. Then let your students get creative. Try making more complicated sauces, or skipping the sauce entirely in favor of sliced vegetables, white beans and a drizzle of olive oil. Add chicken or beef or shrimp. Find gluten-free pasta if

you’re wheat-intolerant. branch out into Asian noodles, rice-based dishes and pasta salads. There’s a whole world of simple, cheap, nutritious cooking based on pasta and noodles, and your children will thank you if they know how to make it themselves.

4. Bake bread Many people are afraid to bake bread. Something about the rising process seems mysterious and unattain-able. There are many fussy bread recipes out there, ones that require precise measurements and precise timing, but there are also a number of unfussy bread recipes, too. Type “no-knead bread recipe” into Google to discover some that just require stirring ingredients together and giving the dough time to rise, or check out “Artisan bread in Five Minutes a Day” (Thomas Dunne books, 2007) for a method that lets you keep dough in the refrigerator so that it’s ready to bake when you want it. If yeast itself makes you or your students anxious, start with quick breads, which get a bit of lift from leaveners (baking soda or baking powder) rather than yeast. Try cornbread for a savory side dish or a cranberry-orange-walnut bread for a sweet addition to the breakfast table.

5. Bake cookies A healthful diet includes the occasional treat, and homemade cookies are more nutritious and more deli-cious than store-bought ones. Plus, this way you get the wonderful aroma of baking cookies wafting through your house. Start with a simple chocolate chip recipe, or learn to make a household favorite. either way, you shouldn’t have too much trouble getting children to pay attention to this particular cooking lesson.◆

MeGAN Rowe/SPeCIAL To THe TowN CRIeR

Soups are not only easy to prepare, but they also keep well in the refrigerator or freezer.


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Don’t pass dental phobias down to children

By Ken Schweifler, D.D.S.

A prospective new patient called my office the other day urgently seeking help

for tooth pain. He had no interest in a comprehensive exam – he just wanted to be rid of pain. He said it had been approximately six years since he’d seen a dentist. I’m surprised at how prevalent this mind-set toward dentistry is – and how parents can unwittingly pass their dental phobias down to their children. with the expertise and technology we possess to detect dental problems early, offer more conservative treatments that preserve tooth structure and avoid painful emergencies, why would anyone tolerate the agony the patient was experiencing? Pain is the ultimate dental motivator, but symptoms often suggest that a preventable problem has gone way too far.

People avoid the dentist for myriad reasons. In their avoidance, their den-tal problems mount, leading to more discomfort, complicated treatments at higher expenses and an increased risk

of tooth loss. As a health-centered dentist, there’s perhaps nothing more frustrating than watching children fall victim to avoidable dental disease. There’s no doubt that parents’ initiative toward pre-ventive dental care – or lack thereof – will be transmitted to their children. I’m always struck by parents who are adamant that their children receive comprehensive oral health care but don’t model the same level of care for themselves. They may point to a deeply entrenched dental fear from a past traumatic experience or even blame their parents for a lack of routine, preventive care. I commend those parents for attempting to overcome their personal dental challenges for their children’s sake,

Dental Health


denTAlbut I also stress the importance of modeling healthy dental habits. Young children always try to emulate their parents. My 1-year-old son watches his parents and older sisters brush their teeth and mimics the behavior. There are varying opinions regarding the best time for children to first see a dentist. The American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry recommends a first dental visit by age 1. I haven’t mentioned that to anyone who hasn’t responded in surprise. The main objectives for an early visit are to educate parents on healthful preventive strategies, implement a preven-tive regimen, catch any destructive habits in their infancy and assimilate the child to the dental office as a positive, nontraumatic environment. one way to ensure a lifelong aversion to dental care is to forego a child’s first dental visit until they are 5, in pain and have a mouth full of cavities. Dental decay affects U.S. children more than any other chronic infectious disease.

Continued on Page 22TowN CRIeR FILe ART


The good news is that consistent oral home care with regular fluoride, healthful eating habits and regular den-tal visits can virtually eliminate the risk of cavities. Parents comment that they have “terrible teeth,” and they assume their children will succumb the way they have. It’s true some people have higher risk factors and are more vulnerable to disease than others, but I have found that it’s often poor habits – not the “terrible teeth” – that are the root of the problem. with higher-risk in-dividuals, early preventive measures become even more critical. I commonly see older children for the first time in my office who already have decalcified enamel – enamel that hasn’t formed ideally – often due to lack of fluoride. Such enamel becomes much more vulnerable to decay. by seeing a child as young as 1, we can create a simple strategy to ensure ideal enamel formation. The benefits of fluoride have significantly reduced decay risk, but frequent between-meal snacking is prevalent and renders teeth much more vulnerable to decay. It’s not just sugary sweets that are the culprits, but also the carbohy-drates in typical snack foods. Many parents in my practice seem less concerned about their children’s baby teeth because they’re not permanent, but these primary teeth serve several impor-tant functions and their premature loss can complicate a child’s dental future. A healthy primary dentition ensures proper chewing for maintaining nutrition, aids in speech development and helps maintain the spaces necessary for the permanent teeth to erupt. There are two approaches to health care: treating disease as it arises or preventing it from occurring in the first place. The traditional medical model focuses on treating symptoms of disease, and, generally, much less emphasis is placed on prevention. The majority of dental practices in the U.S. practice similarly. our society is moving at a feverish pace and seems geared toward instant gratification and quick fixes. Some dental practices are so busy treating disease that there’s little time spent on education, to prevent the disease from occurring in the first place. empowering people with prevention education surely takes time, but educated patients are likely to spend much less time and money in the dental chair over the course of their lives. Arm yourself and your loved ones with the power of prevention.

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wunderlich county

park stables • Public Boarding • Trail Rides

• Horse Camps • Lessons Come see what's new at Folgers Stable!650-446-1414

Teodora's CompleTe HouseCleaning serviCe

Reasonable Rates • Meticulous WorkWeekly / Bi-weekly / Monthly

Satisfaction Guaranteed • Exc. Refs Free Est. • Lic. # 031292

Hm: 650-964-7572Cell: [email protected]

FLORESGARDEN SERVICE

General Clean Ups.All Tree Work. Pruning.

Trimming etc. Sprinkler Systems.Local for 35 yrs. Free Est. 650-948-8965

Young Life Christian Preschool

Please Call for a tour!

687 Arastradero Road Palo Alto, CA 94306

www.pacrc.org/younglife.htm

(650) 494-7885Presenting age appropriate learning in a safe, positive

enviornment. Family oriented and multi-cultural,

now in our 19th year.Ages 2 1/2 to 5 years.

Al Peterson Roofingsince 1946

Specializing in• Repairs • Reroofing

• Maintenance• Gutter cleaning

• Moss removal650-493-9177

ArmAndo's moving

Homes • Apts. • storageFully Licensed / Insured.

#CAL-T 190632

[email protected]

RichaRd Lebakos

650-776-6545www.harmonyscapes.com

License# 931608

HARMONYSCAPESLandscape Management

Sophia:408-777-8546

PERSONALCASTLES

Cleaning is what we do best. Specializing in marble, hardwood,

windows.

Long term commitment!

www.personalcastles.comLic# 6494271210

VP CONSTRUCTION13335 Quito Rd.

Saratoga, CA 95070

Specializing in All Details & Phases of Construction

Custom Homes/Residential Framing & Foundation

Your Personal Construction ConsultantRemodeling Specialist - Established 1999

License #767610Phone: 408-422-7105

Saratoga, [email protected]

www.vmsconstruction.net

denTAlContinued from Page 21

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