Whydentity: 17 Practices to Help You Transform Your Mind
and Live Your Life’s Purpose By: Drew Canole
www.FitLifeTV.com
Published by Archangel Ink Copyright © 2014, FitLifeTV
This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Amazon.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Table of Contents
Introduction
What My Whydentity Has Done For Me
Is This Book For You?
Will You Take the Whydentity Challenge?
Looking Inward
Practice #1: Fuel for Your Life
Practice #2: Talk to Yourself
Practice #3: Build Your Trophy Room
Practice #4: Thank YOU
Practice #5: Break Free from Your Ruts
Practice #6: Put It In Writing
Looking Outward
Practice #7: Step Outside
Practice #8: Connect from the Heart
Practice #9: Messages of Merit
Practice #10: Counting Kindnesses
Practice #11: Use Your Senses
Practice #12: Forgiveness
Looking Upward
Practice #13: Your Life, By Design
Practice #14: Incantation
Practice #15: Meditative Conditioning
Practice #16: Abundance
Practice# 17: Connectedness
Parting Thoughts
What’s Next?
Will You Do Me a Favor?
Introduction
I’m grateful you are reading this, my friend.
Have you ever had someone come into your life and teach you something
that would eventually change your whole experience? Or, maybe they did something
and by their demonstration it changed your course in life and opened your mind up
to a new possibility an entirely brand new way to live, powerfully, fully and on
purpose?
This book has many of the lessons I’ve learned from my greatest teachers,
mentors, coaches, and spiritual gangsters. If you read this book with an open mind
and do the practices, it will transform your mind, body, and soul.
I want to let you know that accidents don’t happen. You are reading this for a
reason, my friend. You’ve brought into your life a book rich with energy and
abundance. It’s no coincidence that you and I are connecting in this way at this time.
The world needs us now, more than ever. As we go through this book together, I
want you to imagine me being with you as your coach, not in an authoritative type of
way, but in a supportive loving kind of way.
Something big is about to happen in your life because you’re perfectly
positioned to take yourself and your life on like never before – and I’m excited to
have the opportunity to help you along the way.
Maybe you found this book through my FitLife.tv videos. Maybe you’ve got a
friend who recommended it. Or, maybe you’re not sure exactly how you ended up
with this book! However it happened, I just want to reassure you that you’re on the
right track, and that that “something big” is right there waiting for you. In fact, it’s
just one transformation away for you.
That’s where I come in. See, I’ve worked with thousands of people all over
the world to help them transform their health – both in their physical bodies and
also in their minds. I’ve lost count how many videos and blog posts and trainings
I’ve created to help people create massive, positive change in their lives.
With any big change, you’ve got to start somewhere, right? Most people know
me from the coaching and training I do on juicing. There’s no faster way to change
how your body looks, feels, and performs, and there’s nothing more exciting than
watching someone’s body transform as they change the way they fuel it.
But you know what? There’s something even bigger and more exciting that
I’ve been privileged to help people with, and it’s why you’re reading this book right
now. It’s helping people transform their minds, then discover and live their life’s
purpose. Transform your mind, and everything else follows!
I can’t even tell you how many people I’ve seen and helped as they went
through the transformation process you’re about to discover… but I can tell you
how you’ll recognize them. They’re the kind of people who are magnetic, real, truly
connected, and happy. They’ve gone through a journey to get where they are, and
enjoy the sweet taste of success… in reaching big goals, accomplishing big dreams,
and becoming their true selves along the way by transforming their own minds.
So many people in the FitLife community have asked for guidance on finding
and living their life’s purpose and creating lasting change, that I just knew this book
needed writing – and the fact that you’re holding it right this minute tells me we’re
about to do something big together. In fact, your whole life may change, from this
moment forward.
Can I tell you a little bit of my story? No matter what your life is like right
now, we might have a lot in common. Maybe the details of our stories are different,
but I’d bet the core is the same – and it’ll help you see how we really are in this
together.
I grew up in the small town of Cadillac, Michigan. I had young parents, which
isn’t a problem for everyone but it certainly was for me. My parents weren’t ready to
give up their hard-partying ways, my father in particular. His dissatisfaction with life
came back on me in the form of physical abuse. If I couldn’t tie my shoes fast enough,
he would put a cigarette out on my head. I was literally tortured as a child, with my
body and soul suffering several blows.
I felt trapped in my small town with parents who were supposed to love me
but who were hurting me instead. Why was all of this horrible stuff happening to
ME? I knew it wasn’t right, wasn’t how parents were supposed to treat their
children. Yet this was my life, every day. It felt like I was constantly walking on
eggshells, afraid to make a move that would land me in trouble again, and always
wondering if this was how my whole life was going to be.
But one day I realized something: Nothing in life is good OR bad. At least it
doesn’t have to be. How you heal and grow is all about your mindset, and
transforming it if it’s not serving your highest good.
Everything depends on your personal mindset. Everything is how you
interpret it, and nothing is ever just one way. The fire that melts butter in a pan is
the same fire that bends steel into shape.
It’s all about what those little voices in your head are telling you every
second of every day. It’s truly amazing how much power they have. And I’ve made it
my life’s goal to use my own experience to help people get through their own
problems so they can come out on the other side. If I can do it, you can do it too!
I know this for a fact, because I’ve seen total transformation in people’s lives
once they make that shift. They go from living life defeated, hurting, unhappy, and
barely getting by to being happy, powerful, whole, and so aligned with their purpose
that they aren’t just getting by, they’re actually making a major contribution to the
world… just by being themselves.
Perspective is what holds back most people from ever achieving their full
potential. You could be born with all the potential in the world for achievement:
good health, a good support system, intelligence, and talent. You could use all that to
build a life that looks good from the outside: healthy, wealthy, and surrounded by
people who love you. But without the right mindset, there’s no way to make it so
real that you’re happy at the very core of who you are. Without a mind
transformation, you’ll be stuck forever exactly where you are.
It’s no fun feeling stuck, depressed, without hope, and overwhelmed by
what’s going on around you. That’s where I was for years. But you can get out of it.
Trust me, I’ve seen so many people experience total, lasting transformation,
becoming who they were always meant to be.
That’s why I want to share this book with you, so you can discover and draw
on your own Whydendity. This concept is at the core of my program, and sets it
apart from any other personal development program you can find. It’s designed to
help bring your higher self into your present situation so you can reach your
greatest potential.
You see, your mindset is incredibly powerful, even more so than you may
think. You can follow any diet, fitness, or personal growth program you want, but if
you don’t change yourself at your core, it won’t work. Your mindset is at the root of
who you are, and transforming it is the first step toward achieving life-changing,
long term success.
Your mindset is like the engine behind everything you do, whether it’s
growing as a person and reaching toward your goals or just shuffling through life in
a cycle of pessimism. If you look at life with a positive perspective, you’ll attract
other people with positive outlooks on life. You’ll also be more motivated to work
toward your goals, whether they concern money, love, or even building an entire
new life. Happiness is like fuel for your ideal life, and you can always make more!
Are you ready? We’re all in this together!
Drew
What My Whydentity Has Done For Me
It was in my darkest hour that this process changed everything about me.
Three years ago, I was living in Tampa, Florida. I was running a debt settlement
company right out of college, and had a lot of money coming in every month to pay
the bills, party every weekend, and take private jets wherever my friends and I
wanted to go. Many people considered me to be very successful for my age.
But with all of this success, why did I feel so empty inside? You’d think
someone like that would feel like they were on top of the world! I was 28 years old
and had the whole world at my fingertips.
Have you ever had a friend or a mentor come in your life and tell you
something that would completely change your concept about everything in an
instant?
My best friend and mentor did just that. In a conversation with Frank, he told
me I wasn’t 100% truly happy because I far too focused on ME! He said I’d been
living a selfish life – like most people do – and that if I was ever going to arrive at a
100% totally happy, alive, and abundant place, I had to get over me and start living
for we!
It wasn’t the first time I’d heard that, actually. I’d read similar advice in books
and heard it from speakers – but it never sank in before. This time it was different.
Once Frank said this to me, I asked myself…
What would my life look like, if I lived for others?
If everything I did during the day was for the betterment of humanity at
large, how would this change me?
Would I still look in the mirror and worry about the crow’s feet that were
starting to form? Or the few grey hairs I had coming in on my face? Or the extra 40
pounds of fat I was continuing to carry around with me, everywhere I went?
Would I even notice the little things in life that were always causing me anger
and despair?
Talking what Frank said to heart and applying it to my life has changed
everything over the past three years. Every morning when I wake up, I now ask
myself, “Who can I help today?”
This attitude has allowed our movement at Fitlife to reach almost 2 million
people on social media, and almost 4 million people through our blog each month.
It’s given me the courage to write multiple best selling books where before I would
have let resistance hold me back and probably would never have finished. It’s also
brought about multiple TV appearances and an Infomercial where I ended up
speaking in front of thousands of people, where before I would have had extreme
stage fright.
It’s deepened my relationships with all of the people in my life. I can actually
listen outside of myself and the mental recall is through the roof. Before I would
have trouble remembering people’s names, let alone the names of their kids, what
they do for a living, and how they are changing the world.
This Whydentity process and living for others has even helped me love
myself more. It’s funny how that works. The more compassion and love you have for
others, the more it shows up for you in your own unique experience.
Truth be told, I was once scared, and lived in a state of constant fear and very
little self-confidence. ALL of this changed when I started living for WE and got
outside of ME.
It’s quite possible that as you read this, you are thinking, “I do live for others,
that’s my biggest problem!” If that’s you, I think it may be a safe bet that the second
half, having self-love, may be missing. So if that sounds like you, keep reading,
because the practices in this book will absolutely transform your whole life and help
you shower that same love you’ve got for others onto yourself as well.
Our goal is to transform 10 million people from the inside out, and the tools
in this book are among some of the greatest resources we’ve accumulated over the
past three years to help people experience massive breakthroughs.
We’re going to give you a step by step road map and challenge to get you to a
point of total control, personal power, unstoppable motivation, and to develop a
burning desire to change to change the world.
I have just one thing to ask of you my friend: Take this challenge seriously.
Is This Book For You?
Have you ever wondered why some people are so happy, connected,
successful, and healthy and other people clearly aren’t? Why some seem to be in
touch with their higher self, practically glowing, just bursting with potential? I think
everyone knows one person who just radiates that kind of happiness. They seem to
magically attract everything everyone wants – good people, financial abundance, a
healthy body, and all kinds of opportunities to make a significant contribution to the
world around them. They just seem so… alive – and they bring this incredible
energy into everything they do, which only seems to produce even more positive
energy. It’s like they’re magnetic, attracting happiness that sticks and grows. Know
anyone like that?
You probably do.
In fact, maybe that’s what nudged you to pick up this book in the first place.
Maybe you’ve been feeling like there must be more, like you’re nowhere near as
happy as you could be in life. Maybe you’ve been working on yourself, maybe even
juicing and working out, but you’ve come to realize that you’re just kind of stuck,
and you’re not sure why or how to get unstuck again. Maybe you’re feeling like
there’s got to be a purpose to your life, but you’re missing it somehow, and that
that’s not okay anymore. Maybe you’re battling feelings of overwhelm, struggling
with perfectionism and the fear that you’re somehow not enough, or maybe you’re
finding it hard to prioritize the kind of self care that would help you reach your full
potential.
Well, you know those happy, present people you’ve noticed? The ones who
leave you wondering what’s different about them, how they seem to live like
happiness magnets? I’m here to tell you, through this short little book you’re reading
right now, how those people got to be the way they are. It’s all in the mindset they
choose to adopt. It’s not a way of showing up in the world that only some people can
have, it’s not a quality most people are born and raised with, it’s not something you
can fake or force, and it’s not out of reach for you if that’s now how you’re
experiencing life right at this moment. For most people, it’s the result of a total
transformation of who they are.
After many years of work and perseverance, I figured out how to tune my
mind to be both positive and productive. This attitude didn’t come to me easily –
and I sure wasn’t born or raised with it. I had to wade through many years of
unhappiness, including personal tragedy involving abuse. Maybe that’s part of your
story, too. Maybe you’re standing there looking at those happy people, telling
yourself that kind of happiness is out of reach because of your past. Maybe you’ve
been told so many times in your life that you aren’t worthy of being happy… or even
of being at all.
You might have mixed feelings right about now. Part of you feels like you
might be crazy for even thinking you could have more happiness in life, more love,
more financial abundance, more impact, more purpose, more… everything. That
part is the same old voice that’s tried to protect you from disappointment and hurt,
to keep you in the rut where even if it’s not at all the life you want, at least it’s
familiar.
But there’s another voice that’s trying to get your attention. It’s trying to tell
you to be brave, to have faith, to take the first step toward changing your whole life.
It’s hoping you’ll believe, even for the time it takes to read this little book, that you
are worthy of happiness, of living an authentic life, of leaving “stuck” far behind, of
inspiring others to grow, too. It’s that voice that has a vision for how your life could
be. It’s that voice that will be cheering you on step by step as you progress. It’s that
voice that hopes you’ll have the courage to set off on this adventure, even though
you can’t see exactly how it will play out.
You may even have some questions popping up as you consider going
through the Whydentity process. Here are some common questions we’ve heard,
and some answers that can help you decide whether this is right for you right now.
Will my Whydentity change?
Your Whydentity is constantly evolving, just as you are. Every day as you
develop who you are there will be opportunities to add depth to your why. So, it
may stay the same throughout your life but different elements will get added to it,
more emotional fuel and love will really help you stay consistent.
What if I start the book and don’t finish?
Let’s be honest with ourselves here. Most of the books I’ve personally
purchased I haven’t finished yet. I get what I need at the time and then I move on. If
you buy this book and get one thing and are fine with that one thing, and implement
that right away then this book worked for you. The idea behind these practices and
the action-oriented system we put in place here is to change who you are. I’m not
here to preach about self-development… I’m all about supporting you as you
implement the practices that will help you most.
What if my religious beliefs interfere with anything this book says?
This book is non-religion specific. My own personal belief is that there is a
higher power that has impacted my life on many levels. You will not read this and
feel like you are pulled in any direction that is discordant with your values.
Eventually I will write books that will talk more about my personal spiritual journey
and will let you know, if you are interested. :)
If you’re ready, it’s time to dive in. You’ll have to keep reading to understand
the Whydentity Process and the transformative practices I’m about to share, and
how to use them to change your own life so you can find and unleash your own
authentic self. It’s an exciting shift that awaits you as you do this work, and one that
can change your whole life, forever. I’m really happy to be able to use all I’ve learned
and gone through to help you along your path as well, and can’t wait to get started
with you. Even though we’re not face-to-face, I hope you know I’m right there with
you in spirit – and that you can think of this book as a way to have your very own
life coach with you every step of the way.
Are you ready to take the first step?
Before we start, I want to show you how to squeeze the most juice possible
from this book. You see, this is definitely not your average motivational book. You
know the kind – you feel excited and energized as you read, pumped up to make
important changes in your life. You reach the end of the book, close it, and then
nothing else happens. It’s too easy to absorb information without taking action –
without action, nothing changes.
So while the ideal situation would be that we get to work one-on-one, I
wanted to provide a way everyone could take action and keep moving forward.
You’ll see some challenges throughout the book. They’re designed to help you take
meaningful action, provide accountability, and connect you with a community of
people who are also seeking life transformation as well. I hope you’ll take part!
The seventeen practices I’m about to share with you will help you transform
your life in three major directions: inward, outward, and upward. It’s all connected,
of course!
We start with transforming how you relate with yourself, how your inner
voice speaks to your own mind, how you care for yourself, and how you can realize,
down to your core, the infinite possibilities that are right there within your reach,
right now.
In the second set of practices, what you’ll learn will help you transform how
you relate with the world around you. As you practice them, you’ll find yourself
connecting more powerfully with the people in your life as you also begin noticing
and enjoying life like never before. This is important, because it raises your energy
vibration, attracting even more greatness into your life. We attract what we put out!
Finally, the third set of practices will aim upward, helping you connect with
and harness the power of the whole Universe as you find and fulfill your whole life’s
purpose. You’ll discover how amazing it feels to be in complete alignment with all
you are meant to be, fully present in your life like never before, and living with such
a strong sense of purpose and power that you become virtually unstoppable.
As you work through the practices in this book, take time to let each one kind
of soak in. It’s called practice for a reason! Don’t just read through in a race to finish
the book – you’ll just cheat yourself out of the change and results that could have
been yours if you’d been more mindful along the way. Focus on each practice, one at
a time, and you’ll be amazed as you watch yourself shed old thought-patterns and
habits, and begin to see your life take on a brand new feel.
Are you ready to take the Whydentity Challenge? It’s at the core of everything
else you’re about to learn. Are you up for this?
Will You Take the Whydentity Challenge?
“What you think, you create. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you
become.”
Unknown
If you’re reading this, I know something important about you: You believe
you can change your life. You also realize how important it is to be able to visualize
the life you want to create before you turn them into reality. If you’ve been following
me for a while, you’ve heard me talk about Think, Feel, Become. That’s what’s at the
core of the Whydentity Process.
You see, you attract what you are. That’s one of my core beliefs, and it’s why
creating lasting change is about more than just changing what you do. No matter
how strictly you follow a diet, or how many times a week you work out, or whatever
else you DO to try to change your life, if you don’t change how you think and feel,
you won’t become who you want to be. You manifest life experiences that prove
what you truly think and feel, at your core – so that’s where the real transformation
needs to happen if you want to experience transformation in your life.
Transformation of that core is what makes you become that magical being who
attracts abundance and joy like a magnet.
The Whydentity Process is built on a proven visualization technique that was
developed by Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) practitioners. This is a practice
that can help you to mentally rehearse what you want to create, so you can clear
space for it to show up naturally. It’s a powerful series of questions we ask all of our
coaching clients to help us really get inside their brain and allow their higher self,
their newfound potential to come forward into their present experience. It’s at the
very core of the Whydentity Process, and it’s the surest way to create the kind of
change that sticks, long-term, rather than just being temporary.
Right now, I want you to take a minute and just picture your ideal life. Just
ignore everything else in the external world. Settle yourself down and venture deep
into the core of who you are. Let yourself just sink into your internal self.
Picture yourself happy. Picture yourself going to a job you love every day,
doing something that makes you feel happy and fulfilled. What does that look like?
What does it feel like to have that job? What kind of job would make you happy
enough that you would go back day after day?
Now think of coming home from that job. What kind of a home is it? Who’s
there waiting for you, if anyone? How do you relax from a hard day at work? What
do you enjoy doing with your free time? Traveling? Getting together with friends?
Helping others? What is it?
All that you have just imagined is possible. All you need to do is get your
mind set for success. And I’ll be here to help you every step of the way.
Now, here’s the Whydentity Challenge. This is the set of questions I asked
myself at the beginning of FitLife, and it’s these same questions we take every one of
our transformation coaching clients through at the beginning of their program. No
matter where you’re starting from in your life, this is the process to use to move
yourself forward, creating lasting transformation as you go. This process leads to
change at a deep, fundamental level.
1. In 90 days, what do I want to look like?
Physically, how do I see myself when I look in the mirror? What does my
muscle formation look like? How does my skin look? My posture? This
gives you a visual perspective. You can ramp up the effectiveness of this
question by going online to find pictures of exactly what you want. Stick
them on your fridge or mirror so you can see them and be reminded
throughout the day, visually, of what you want to accomplish.
2. What do I want to hear from my close friends, family, and relatives?
What are they saying about me? What are you hearing in their voices?
This is the hearing element of your visualization. Write this down, say it
out loud to yourself. It might sound silly to do, but I can’t even tell you
how many students I’ve had come back and tell me how exciting it was
when their friends or loved ones said EXACTLY what they imagined!
After you’ve tried it on yourself, imagining what you’d love to hear,
imagine saying these things to someone you love! Get outside of yourself
and try it on in your own life. Compliment someone and lift them up
today, and see how it feels from that side!
3. What do I feel like in 90 days?
What kind of energy do I feel when I wake up? Am I eager to pop out of
bed and explore the new day? Do I feel rested and rejuvenated from a
good sleep? This is about your feelings and experience. It’s about being
able to live in the present moment as if you’d already accomplished the
transformation you seek. Write these feelings down, and then just take a
moment to really FEEL the feelings you just wrote.
For example, if you wrote that in 90 days, you feel unbounded energy,
imagine it. What’s it feel like physically? Emotionally? You can make this
even more powerful by adding music. Music can make you feel better, and
even raise your vibrational state on command.
Now, imagine giving this feeling to someone else you love. You can
become the conduit of this feeling by sharing it.
4. Why am I doing this transformation?
Your reason has to be bigger than you, so big and all-encompassing that it
makes a difference in the world, for your children, your partner, your
friends, and your relatives. It’s the biggest question of all. Why do you
want this transformation in your physical life, your relationships, your
emotional life, your finances? You’ll experience the most powerful, lasting
transformation when you can get crystal clear on why you want it in the
first place.
Spend a few minutes reflecting on this WHY and writing about it in the
workbook that goes with this book. A magical thing happens when you
write something – it spreads from your mind and imagination and
becomes real, first in what you see on the page, and then in your daily life.
As you go through the process of answering these four questions, it’s
important to visualize the outcome you desire vividly. It’s called mental rehearsal.
You want to really see and hear and feel yourself living the way you desire. Increase
the intensity of your visualization by adding vivid details as if you were painting a
picture of it – and then stepping into it, feeling the emotions of it and using your
senses to take it in.
Think about what this sounds like to your ears. What pictures are on the wall
of the room you are in? Who else is there with you? What are their facial
expressions like? What are they wearing? What clothes do you have on? Or are you
naked? (Don’t be creepy! Just be as detailed as you can be!)
These questions will help you open mind and make the changes you want to
make in your life. But reading about transformation isn’t enough. It’s all too easy to
get kind of a high from reading a book like this. You finish the last page, think about
how great it would be to make important changes in your life, and then forget all
about it. Or, you head off in the right direction for a couple of days until the high
wears off, then wonder why it didn’t work for you.
You have to have a way to implement what you’re learning. This is super easy
when you’re in a coaching program, because you’ve got built-in accountability with
your coach. You have someone else waiting to hear about the changes you’re
implementing, someone to help you notice your progress along the way, someone to
celebrate with you. But without that external support, the enthusiasm you have
right now for going through this total transformation can fade quickly… but that’s
not going to happen to you! You’re following along and getting the support you need
as you go, and guess what – the best support comes from within, once you live
outside yourself.
That’s why throughout this book you’ll find that some of the practices are
designed to help create a sense of virtual support, to help you connect with a
community of likeminded people who are also going through a major
transformation. It’s also why some of the exercises involve you getting outside of
you. Make sure you take full advantage of the power of connection!
In fact, here’s your first opportunity!
Will You Take the Whydentity Challenge?
Go through the Whydentity Process questions on your own, then video yourself
sharing your “why”. Upload your Whydentity commitment to change and success on
WhydentityWall.com. You’ll be amazed by how powerful it is to share this with a
group who’s rooting for your success. Remember, we’re in this together!
Visit Whydentitywall.com to take part in the community
by joining this movement.
Looking Inward
“We must always change, renew, rejuvenate ourselves; otherwise we harden.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Looking inward involves a deep look into who you are and the beliefs about
what you have in regards to you. What type of thoughts do you have about yourself?
Who are you when you show up for you? Where do you feel stuck in your own life?
It’s about viewing yourself as you really are, getting clear on yourself, your
integrity, your values, your dreams, and your true identity. We’ll work on looking
outward and then upward, but first you have to get a crystal clear view inward. So
many people have no real idea of who they are, what they stand for, or what they
dream about. It’s crucial to get tapped into who your authentic self is first. After you
do this work, you can look forward to experiencing:
● A better idea of who you are
● Clarity on what you actually want to become
● The experience of evaluating your relationship with yourself
● What it’s like to look at yourself as an observer for the first time
● New insights gained about what sets you on fire
The start of your transformation journey is about creating a more positive
vibration in your life and in others’ as well. This isn’t just about thinking happy
thoughts and hoping for the best. Instead, it’s about shifting away from the kinds of
thoughts that poison your mind and your life and instead, cultivating the kinds of
thoughts that literally produce happiness – the kind of happiness that works like a
magnet to attract even more exuberance into your life.
The practices you’ll develop in this section will help you cultivate a mindset that
makes exponentially increasing energy, power, and purpose possible. You’ll learn
how to trigger the power of your own mind and your own words to create more
abundance every day that you practice.
Don’t give up. If you can improve every day by 1%, you’re making a huge improvement in your life.
You will make it! You will reach that goal. Trust me.
In fact, take a look at what some of our coaching students have said about the 1%:
The 1% Better has been just the power I needed to really move & transform my life!
Just "1% Better" is so easy for my mind to accept and therefore transformation
continues to grow and should have no end!
Lorna Hutcheson
1% better is the best way to reduce the overwhelm and frustration that otherwise
accompany change. All you have to do is focus on the next 1%, and before you know it,
significant transformation has occurred with ease!
Beth Hulsbrink
The 1% Better concept is simple and I am able to take each day as it comes without
feeling overwrought. It's a daily snapshot of my progress, which is sometimes easier
for me to view rather than the main goal, which is months away.
Penny Todd Rosina
I have found that by focusing in on my 1% better I don't get overwhelmed by the
process. It has made my transformation journey a joy to be on and so much less
frustrating from all my previous attempts... I know this transformation is here to stay!
Jill Potter-Smart
1% better meant that ANY small improvement that I made was considered a success.
This made stringing together daily successes simple and my overall transformation
more enjoyable! It looks like the calm in the middle of the storm. 1% better is a perfect
illustration for what being true to your Whydentity can do for you.
Angela Billups Aghaziem
“1% better" is the perfect mindset tool to get 100% of you! It has allowed me to
become present and aware on every step taken during this transformation process. It
is very simple; "1% better" isn’t fancy, but is incredibly powerful at elevating your
level of consciousness.
Mercedes Indiana Elizalde
As we move into the first exercises of looking inward, my friend, know that I’m
constantly working on this every day in my own life. With each day that passes I
learn more about what my self-induced limitations are and what holds me back
from being connected more to the Infinite. I’m not claiming to have my life mastered
at this point, but I will tell you this, I will not give up this need for self-discovery –
for the more I expand, the greater the impact I can have on others.
My “why” is to help people who have been abused by others or have been abused
by their own thoughts – I am passionate about helping them break free and really
live! Live fully, passionately and lovingly. It’s time for you to rise and shine.
Practice #1: Fuel for Your Life
“A healthy outside starts from the inside.”
Robert Urich
One of the most beneficial things I’ve ever done for my personal health was
to start juicing. Whether it’s a Cooling Celery Juice smoothie or an Adios Coffee,
juicing’s become a key part of my life. It helps my body reset itself by giving it all the
micronutrients it needs, so I don’t have to reach for the macronutrients like those in
burgers and steak. It’s all about keeping it fresh and real.
But beyond simple nutrition, juicing is a key ritual for me when it comes to
keeping my personal perspective on track. It reawakens my body, and gives it the
nutrition I need to make good decisions. When my cells and muscles are getting
everything that they need, I’m better able to make decisions and keep a positive
outlook on life.
If any of my clients are feeling depressed or anxious, I often recommend that
they start juicing. There are different starting levels for different levels of
experience, and anyone can do it in a safe and healthy way. I’ve seen it work too
often and change too many people’s lives to not recommend it.
By sorting out their body’s basic needs, their brains can focus better and
work more efficiently. They’re better able to focus on their emotions, instead of just
maintaining their body’s health. They’re able to thrive, not just survive.
Beyond juicing, fasting has proven to be a highly beneficial practice for those
looking to reset their personal mindset. Fasting is incredibly beneficial for those
looking to reset their entire body. You literally walk away from a fasting experience
with an entirely new body.
Science Geek Drew Moment:
Clinical studies showed that glucose “calories” were required and used any
time test subjects used willpower.
Also, be sure to take a moment to be grateful for the food and water you
have. It’s easy to just take it for granted, but it’s important to remember to be
thankful. With each meal, think about as many positive things about your meal that
you can possibly come up with. It could be as simple as having fresh, clean water,
the color of a bright green vegetable, the scent and texture and taste of a fresh
peach. There are lots of positive things to be thankful for – and adding thanks to
each meal will help you nourish more than just your body.
So, give your body proper fuel. Developing the dual practices of juicing and
fasting is incredible because you’ll learn how to deliver the proper vitamins and
minerals to your body without overburdening it. This frees your body up to spend
more time on creative prospects and other higher functions. So think hard about
what you’re putting into your body, and make one healthier choice today. You’ll be
amazed at what can happen!
Why not make a daily Super Shake or juice, to try this out for yourself? Think
of juicing as sort of an insurance plan that makes it easy to provide your body much
needed nutrients. They’re fast and easy to make, help to support your metabolism,
and also help reinforce your daily transformation routines. There’s no better way
than using Super Shakes to get the high-quality protein, fat, fiber, and super foods
into your body.
It’s easy to build a Super Shake: Simply choose one a liquid or base, a protein
powder, a veggie, a fruit, a healthy fat, and a topper if you want one. Example: 1 cup
almond milk, 2 handfuls leafy greens (power greens), 1 scoop protein powder, ½
cup berries, your choice of superfood (i.e. chia seeds, maca powder, matcha powder,
flaxseeds, etc.), and ice.
Juicing is easy, too! Here’s one of my favorites: 2 cucumbers, 3 stalks celery, a
handful of spinach, 1 apple, and half of a lemon.
There are so many variations you can create that it’s easy to treat your taste
buds and your body at the same time, while giving your body what you need to
support the life transformation you’re experiencing.
Want to learn more about juicing? Click to check out Juicing Recipes from
Fitlife
Practice #2: Talk to Yourself
“Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind
you.”
Walt Whitman
The day I began to live is the day I started to hear my thoughts and realized I
needed to separate myself from them. One of my coaches told me to pretend my
mind was in my finger, so there I was talking to my index finger in the grocery store
about getting the blue corn tortilla chips or not! Talk about an awkward moment for
everyone involved… I’ll leave it at that.
The bottom line is, you too can control your thinking. Either you have a best
friend who is constantly working with you or an enemy who will stop at nothing to
prevent you from being all that you can be. The enemy is real my friend and it will
stop at nothing to kill your every last hope and ambition. So, how do you and I gain
control over it?
It all comes down to what you spend most of your time thinking about.
Focused thoughts are amazingly powerful, and can actually change our neural
networks. It might sound crazy, but the behaviors we choose eventually seem to
choose us, supporting our thoughts and feelings and actions and making them
stronger. The bad news is that if you don’t work on how you speak to yourself in
your own mind, those unsupportive thoughts and feelings will help you create more
of what you already have. But the great news is that you can use this mechanism to
create patterns that support your goals, and make it feel natural to take actions that
lead you to success.
Learning to speak to yourself in supportive ways is one of the most
fundamental steps toward having a functional mindset and makes it possible for you
to be positive about your place in the world. You need to have faith in your place in
the universe, and your innate importance.
That’s not a stretch, either, when you really think about it. There is no other
person anywhere – never before in the history of the world, and never again to be
repeated – exactly like you. You serve a unique role in the universe. It’s not about
what you do, or what you own, or what you say or know, it’s just the essence, the
core of who you are that plays a role nobody else can play.
So, in this practice, I’d like you to just talk to yourself, and really listen.
Really! Just talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend, and hear the sound of
your own voice. Think of it as “journaling out loud.” You’ll soon realize just how
much power your words have, and how important to make sure that the voices in
your own head are positive ones.
Ask yourself how you feel about your life in general, how you feel about your
body, your mind, your emotional side, your connections with other people, your
spiritual life? You can either talk yourself through these questions or write them
down in your journal. Be as thorough as you can be.
As you listen, what do you think of what you’re hearing? Are you hearing
mostly positive, or mostly negative talk? Do you talk to yourself the way you’d want
someone to speak to your best friend? To your child? Or, have you built a habit of
speaking to yourself in ways that are harsh and critical? If your words are mostly
negative, think about how you can rephrase and reframe what you are saying to use
more positive words. The words you say come from your heart, and return there as
you hear yourself speaking – make sure you choose words that support you in
becoming your best, of honoring yourself along the way, and of reinforcing the
infinite possibilities that wait for you every day of your life.
Becoming aware of the tone you use when you talk to yourself will help you
choose a more supportive, nurturing inner conversation. When you become more
aware of your own internal conversation, you’ll learn to give yourself the same
respect, consideration, and support you’d give someone you love deeply. And after
all, learning how to treat yourself lovingly will help you love others, too!
In our coaching program we have our clients talk about their current
identity. What makes them, them. I want to show you some examples from a few of
our coaching students.
NOTE FOR DREW: NEED TO INSERT THESE.
Practice #3: Build Your Trophy Room
“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.”
Unknown
As a coach, I listen to the language people choose to use, for it reveals a great
amount about what their desire really is and what they believe to be possible. When
someone asks me to support them or help them have a breakthrough and they
immediately start telling me about everything they messed up or how they were
inadequate for whatever goal they were trying to obtain I show them the Trophy
Effect.
It’s a tool I learned from a good friend and coach of mine, Michael Nitti. It
comes from a book called The Trophy Effect. This exercise forces you to focus on the
good, and get outside of your own mind. Getting outside of your own mind helps you
become free.
In this practice, you’ll learn to stay positive by imagining a trophy room. You
know the type, like back in high school: A great big room with wood paneling, with
steel racks inside holding trophies of every size and shape. If you went to a high
school like mine, there’d be a bunch of small trophies that the swim club had won.
Then the medium-sized ones for cross country team, then the enormous one that the
football team won at the state championships.
Got that image in your mind? Okay, picture that. But on every trophy, imagine
something you’ve done yourself etched into that shiny brass finish. Assign small
accomplishments to the small trophies, like, “I didn’t yell at that guy who cut me off
in traffic.” Assign bigger and bigger accomplishments to the bigger trophies, giving
yourself credit for things like…
● Calling your parents
● Maintaining your finances
● Picking up your kids from school consistently
● Being consistent in doing your chores
● Getting a promotion at work
● Earning your first $200 from your website
● Finally finishing that book you’ve been working on
● Getting your roof fixed
● Buying a car by yourself
● Doing something on your bucket list
These are all important things, and all worthy of celebration. Imagine those
achievements (plus any more you can think of!) etched onto trophies. Now stand up
and look around your trophy room. Isn’t that a nice image?
That trophy room is yours alone, and you deserve to take joy in it. You know
why? Because all of those things are true!
But more than all of those achievements by themselves, there’s one common
denominator to them all: YOU. You picked yourself up and accomplished all of those
things. Even if you had help and encouragement along the way (and who hasn’t?),
you have undoubtedly made decisions that have bettered your life. And you can
improve your mindset (and make your life even happier) by reminding yourself of
them.
Practice #4: Thank YOU "If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. It will change your life mightily."
Gerald Good
It’s hard to stay positive if you don’t feel like it. It’s one of the hardest things
you can do. There may be days where it’s so tough that you have a hard time even
getting out of bed in the morning. Listen, I’m just like you, there are moments in my
life when I hit the snooze button over and over. It is in these moments that I’ve
learned to pull myself outside of me and focus on others throughout the day! This is
an immediate mood booster. I’ve heard that sometimes from coaching clients when
we’re just starting to work together that they experience this as well. They need a
way to shift so they can stay positive, no matter what, rather than falling into the
victim mentality which is guaranteed to keep them stuck.
So, how do they make that shift? I share this practice, a turnaround tool with
them that helps change their perspective by changing their perception, and
ultimately this can change your life! It’s a process you’ll need to repeat and practice
every day so it will become a new habit for you. After you make this habit part of
your life, it will become a ritual you’ll want to apply for the rest of your life – it’s that
powerful, that rewarding. Trust me.
Here’s what you do. It’s really simple and it only takes a few minutes. It might
seem strange to thank yourself, but it’s a really powerful way to send yourself love
and appreciation.
You might have been taught to be hard on yourself, to focus on your
shortcomings, and to shy away from building up your self-esteem. It doesn’t need to
be like that! You are worth so much more. Your contribution to the world, just by
existing, is impossible to underestimate. You were put on this planet to fulfill an
important mission – to inspire others around you and bring the light! You may never
even have any idea of the impact you have made on other people, but that doesn’t
mean it doesn’t count. The ripple effect is real and it starts daily everyday.
This practice is all about becoming thankful for yourself – and it leads to
others around you becoming thankful for you as well. Remember, you attract who
you are!
Each night before you fall asleep, thank yourself for showing up that day.
Thank yourself for making healthy choices for your mind, body, and soul. Thank
yourself for taking care of you, for driving safely, for working out, for nourishing
your body well, for appreciating what’s around you, for being a good friend, parent,
child, partner. Spend a few minutes thanking yourself like this, and then watch what
happens. You’ll become a blessing to others by actively appreciating the blessings
that come your way. By loving yourself like this, you’ll become better able to love
others, you’ll increase your vibration, and your whole outlook will change for good.
Want to make this practice even more powerful in your life? Create a tangible
self-love ritual to practice for the next seven days. It could go like this:
Each morning, maybe while drinking water and lemon, spend 1-5 minutes to
get centered while pampering yourself. My favorite way to do this is to moisturize
my skin, very mindfully.
As I massage lotion into my hands, I pay attention to them, thank them, and
love them while thinking of all the ways they have served me throughout my life, all
the handshakes of the past few weeks and months with amazing people I’ve had the
privilege to meet, and all the times my hands have helped me to help myself and to
serve others. It’s a wonderful practice, remembering to relish my life and body
rather than just taking it for granted.
If you use essential oil or an aromatic blend when you do this, you’ll really
anchor these feelings to the senses of smell and of touch. If you do this, each time
you smell that scent throughout the day, you’ll remember that sense of self-love and
the feelings that come with it. In fact, the more often you practice with the scent you
choose, the stronger the new neural synapses you’ll create in your brain. With these
new synapses, you will ingrain this reality into your subconscious, making it a
natural part of you.
Practice #5: Break Free from Your Ruts
“I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.”
Pablo Picasso
When life sucks, it's time to make a change. You are the only person who has
access to and control of your current state. :) If you keep getting the same thing over
and over it is time to change.
You can break the broken cycles in your life and build your chosen dream.
NOW is the time.
Start with identifying the trigger of what starts the routine you are stuck in. If
you’ve been waking up the same way for years, perhaps decades, I want to
encourage you to start your day differently from how you’ve always done it. Begin
with a morning ritual that works for you.
My morning ritual actually begins the night before, as I spend time in deep
appreciation for all the great blessings in my life. I use a long string of beads to help
make this more tangible for me. As I hold each one of the beads, I’ll think of
something I’m especially grateful for – and if it’s been a tough day, I’ll actually go
through the beads twice!
Then I’ll spend some time writing, or scripting, anything that’s really
important that’s happening the next day. For example, if I have a meeting coming up,
I’ll write out – just like a movie script – how I want that meeting to go. Friends, it’s
uncanny how often it plays out just like what I wrote down!
I’ll also prep for the next day by choosing three tasks that are super
important to accomplish. The goal is to be crystal clear on those three tasks, and to
get them done as soon as possible the next day. They’re the tasks that, when you
accomplish them, will move you forward more than anything else you could spend
time on that next day.
Then, when I first wake up, I drink at least a liter of water to rehydrate my
body. This helps me get ready for a workout, which invigorates my body and helps
me to kick off the day with incredible energy. After the workout, I spend about ten
minutes in meditation, focusing on my breath and quieting my mind. Finally, I
devote about an hour to reading and learning – and as I do, I’m on the lookout for
what I could teach someone else that day, because that’s the best way to truly
absorb new information and make it your own.
So, as you create your own morning ritual, choose whatever part of the
morning ritual I just shared that will shake you out of your broken routine. Pick and
choose to create your own morning ritual for success. Be bold and be daring. It’s
these small habits that will change your destiny.
Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits, Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.
Mahatma Gandhi
Practice #6: Put It In Writing
“This pouring thoughts out on paper has relieved me. I feel better and full of
confidence and resolution.”
Diet Eman
In this practice, you’ll spend some time every day journaling. I recommend
journaling to my clients for many reasons, but it is a genuinely helpful tool when it
comes to realization and becoming present and conscious in your own life. When
you write something down, you truly see it for what it is. It’s not wrapped up in your
own perspective, and you can address it head-on. It gives you an ongoing
opportunity to explore and understand who you are at the core, and how you are
aligning with the Whydentity you are using to guide you.
You may think this only applies to realization about your own current life
circumstances. This is true, but it is not the extent of its power. Journaling can
actually be used for an even greater purpose: Showing you just how attainable your
dreams can be.
Right where you are, right now, I want you to take out a piece of paper and a
pencil. You can text it into your phone or write it on a Word document if you want
to. Just open something up, and start writing.
Write down goals that you’ve had for a long time. Impossible goals, or at least
goals that feel impossible from where you are now. Ask yourself: What are you
afraid to wish for? What do you think you’re not good enough to receive?
Very often, goals seem far more scary and unattainable than they really are.
But I want you to take a little bit of time and try to see things as they really and truly
are. Try to take away as much of your own personal perspective as possible. I
guarantee that it will change your life.
The goals that you think are impossible are the only goals that you should
write down! If you could do anything what would you do! Write down as many goals
as you can come up with. Take 30 minutes and write as many down as you can! As
children, we spent so much time dreaming… the older we get the less we really care
about our dreams and the more routine everything becomes. In the routine we lose
our creative capacity to bring into our experience what we are looking to create.
Now look at that list. See how different it looks on paper, outside of your
mind? Feels less scary, doesn’t it? When you look at your list objectively, it’s even
easier to imagine someone accomplishing these goals – and here’s the good news:
You’re Somebody!
Once you have all of your goals, pick a goal and walk through a day in your
mind of what would it be like to obtain that goal? Who would you have to become to
get to that point? What language would you use? What kind of posture would you
have? Maybe you are in the middle of a conversation with someone, what would you
be talking about?
Imagination is so powerful. Anytime I’ve imagined something in my own life -
it has become real if I do the work and hold to being persistent long enough.
Looking Outward
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to
choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
Viktor Frankl
The next stretch of your transformation journey is going to go even deeper.
In some ways, you’ll be looking outward, at transforming how you interact with the
world around you. But you’ll see that again, we’re all connected – and how you show
up anywhere is how you show up everywhere. It’s about looking outward, but the
practices will go deeply inward as well.
What can you expect when you begin working through the practices that help
you look outward? Here are just a few benefits you’ll experience:
● Seeing, first-hand, how your more aware self shows up in the world.
● Feeling a deep sense of love and connectedness to others through
interaction.
● Shining light on the common thread that ties us all together.
● Beginning to experience the amplified effects of helping others.
● Eliminating years of anger and guilt by letting go of the past.
There are some practices coming up that may feel uncomfortable. That’s
okay, though, because they are really effective ways to cut you loose from where
you’re stuck. I’ve used these practices to shift my mindset and I’ve seen so many
others use them the same way to get the same great results that I can’t not share it
with you. That’s why I keep reminding you that we’re in this together – because
these are the same practices I use!
Together, these practices will help you approach life with more positivity
than you’ve ever had. This is a different kind of positivity than the type you’ve
probably heard about. It’s not just looking at the bright side of a situation once and
then going on with your life. I’m talking a lifelong positivity, one that fills you up and
sustains you through life’s troubles. That’s really important, because you can’t
always control your circumstances in life. Sometimes your life experience is really
hard, and if you were dependent on having happy circumstances all the time, it
would be impossible to stay positive.
This kind of positivity is completely different. It’s a state you can generate, on
your own, every day, no matter what you’re facing. The best part? This state of mind
is easy to achieve if you take small steps. It can be a habit, developed and maintained
over time until it influences every part of your life. This is all about changing your
thoughts and actions so that they serve your highest good rather than dragging you
down. It’s an important part of working through the Whydentity Process of
transformation because it’s going to help harness the power of your mind and your
attention to help you achieve the lasting change you desire.
I believe in my heart that every living being on earth is connected. There is an
invisible force connecting every living being on earth, and all of our energies feed
into a greater pool of energy that in turn helps to fuel the universe. We really are all
in this together.
NOTE FOR DREW: INSERT A BRANDED FITLIFE.TV GRAPHIC SAYING: WE’RE
IN THIS TOGETHER
This is my core belief, and it influences everything I’ve done in my adult life.
But this belief system is powerful partly because it is rooted in the experience of
generating and living in a positive vibrational energy. This energy is all around us,
and is there no matter what kid of darkness we may come across. It has the power
to banish any bit of darkness we’re fighting in our lives.
Are you ready?
Practice #7: Step Outside
It is only when we silent the blaring sounds of our daily existence that we can
finally hear the whispers of truth that life reveals to us, as it stands knocking on the
doorsteps of our hearts.
K.T. Jong
It’s crucially important to have a ritual for cleansing your mind and resetting
your own perspective. Over time, your body and soul become overwhelmed with
everything you’ve had to deal with over time, and you don’t have the energy or the
clarity to attract good things into your life. Without a practice that helps you reset
and reconnect, you’ll be stuck swirling around the same pool of pain, frustration,
and distraction you’ve been stuck in for so long.
Take some time and cleanse yourself of all of your stresses. Step outside
yourself and refresh your perspective. Your need to wipe the slate clean, so that you
can work ahead for the future you want and deserve.
No matter what has happened in the past, you do not have to live your life as
a victim. You get to choose and create your own experience. It’s a matter of stepping
outside of the perspectives and patterns you’ve always had, and choosing something
different.
So, how do you shift your perspective? If you’re used to being run over by
that train of emotions when you encounter pain, it can be hard to change how the
process plays out. It’s easy to get carried away in the ruts that have formed by going
that same way every time, over and over. It’s like watching a video of dominoes
falling – you know, when someone sets up thousands of dominoes, covering every
surface in a room. They hit “record” and nudge that first domino, and within just a
minute or two, all of them have fallen, just from the trigger of that first nudge.
That’s how it is when an experience of pain leads to suffering. One trigger
leads to more of everything you hate feeling in your life, and you feel totally out of
control. Unless you can stop that first domino. And you can, now that you
understand that you have that power.
You can do a perspective reset anytime you need to, and stop the autopilot
trip that takes you where you don’t want to go – and you can do it in an instant. Step
outside – figuratively and literally – and push a reset button to remind yourself of
your power to transform how you experience the world inside and outside of
yourself.
Go outside for a moment, or at least look out the window wherever you are,
and just watch what happens outside. This is a common practice for people just
learning how to meditate, because it helps the body focus while keeping your mind
busy. Lots of us have the “monkey mind” problem early on!
Instead of letting your mind fall into the habit of worrying, just for today,
recognize that the only time you have is now. That all there is in your life… this
present moment. When you come to this realization, nothing can hold you back from
living the most authentic life possible. This is true freedom.
For me it was hard to break from my past. Emotional setbacks from the past
would often get to me. Now, I realize that these are not real, just like the person I
was then, I am no longer him. You are constantly changing who you are and because
of this fact it should be hard to help anything against your old self. You are not that
person.
Take 5 minutes today and focus on the present moment. Get silent and count
how many individual sounds you can hear in one place. See yourself as the observer
and just be in this moment.
I made a video about another way you can get very present, anytime you want,
in just a few minutes. Would you do me a favor and watch it, try it out for yourself,
and then let me know what your experience was like? LINK TO
http://fitlife.tv/mindset-mondays-sky-gazing/
Another way to step outside of your old habits and patterns is by reading
books about spiritual health, especially by authors you may never have read before.
I recommend the work of Lao Tzu very highly, as well as the book E Squared: Nine
Do-It-Yourself Energy Experiments That Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality by
Pam Grout. If you have a slightly longer span of time, I recommend watching the
documentary titled “The Five Gateways.”
The practice of stepping outside of the old automatic habits and patterns
makes it easier to break the link between pain and suffering, between what happens
and how I respond to it. Think back to your Whydentity commitment. Remember
why you want to change your life in the first place. Do you think there is any room
for your old mindset in this new life? Do you want to be a slave to the old triggers
that led you down the same rut over and over? Of course not! The good news is you
can stop the domino effect right now, and any time you notice it starting. Just step
outside, and see how you can change your perspective and experience.
Practice #8: Connect from the Heart
“Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something,
and has lost something.”
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
There’s a quote from Vince Lombardi that says, “Fatigue makes cowards of us
all.” I think it also makes it hard to really connect with the people around us. When
you feel stuck in the automatic cycle that happens when you feel the pain of what
has happened to you and then respond the same way you always have, it’s the same
as being fatigued. You’re just responding in the way that feels most familiar, safest –
even if it is not a response that is serving you.
If you are fatigued, overwhelmed by stress, or you haven’t been giving your
body the nutrition and exercise it needs, you are more likely to go into autopilot and
respond in ways that don’t lead where you want to go, especially when it comes to
connecting with the people around you. That’s just one reason it’s important to take
good care of yourself.
True happiness is possible when you break that chain reaction before it gets
going. The trick is stopping yourself before you get sucked in, taking a moment to
breathe and connect, and then choose how you will respond. This way, you respond
the way you choose to rather than the way that you always have, and you become
unstuck and free to become happy and to enjoy being whole.
Get out of your own head space and talk to people. Just reach out to people,
and stay off social media. Social media has caused us all to become more
disconnected, as opposed to more connected, like how the social media network
creators promised it would make us. It’s now very easy to just stay in your own
perspective bubble and get caught in a vicious circle of chaos. So reach out to
another human being, even if it’s a stranger at the office. I promise, you won’t be
disappointed!
Practice #9: Messages of Merit
“If you light a lamp for someone else, it will also brighten your path.”
Buddha
This is a practice that’s very easy to do, but also easy to forget to do. It
requires you to notice ways that other people bless and help and serve you. It’s
simple – you take a moment to notice what someone has done for you, then thank
them for it. It’s easy to notice small things people do for us, and to simply say,
“Thank you” in response. You can take this practice to another level by putting it in
writing. Send a note of affirmation to one person per week – a handwritten note! We
all get so many emails now, but getting a thank you note in the mailbox is a rarity,
and will really make an impact. You could even challenge yourself to write 50 of
these messages in the next year, and see what a difference it makes.
What you’ll find is that sometimes people will actually be shocked that
someone thanked them, that someone saw what they did and appreciated it enough
to say so. As busy, distracted, and negative as many people are, it’s sadly uncommon
to hear words of appreciation and affirmation as we go about our lives. Don’t worry
about whether people are expressing appreciation toward you right now – this is
about practicing appreciation in your own life, a gift you give others and yourself at
the same time. You’ll be amazed to watch this practice take effect in your life. You’ll
feel more connected to people. You’ll find more people doing more things for you
that you appreciate. You’ll also find yourself going out of your way to be kind,
helpful, and open to others. At the same time, you’ll begin to see more positivity
flooding into your life.
Practice #10: Counting Kindnesses
“A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal.”
Steve Maraboli
Have you ever heard the saying, “Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional”?
This practice is about your perspective of your pain and the story you tell yourself
about what it means.
You see, as long as your pain runs you, it’s impossible to become happy, to
live the life you’ve dreamed of, to live a life of purpose and passion. It’s like a train
that drags you where it’s going rather than where you want to go. When you’re
hurting, it’s easier to notice the ways people hurt you – on purpose or by accident.
It’s harder to notice the ways people are kind, to each other or to you.
It doesn’t have to be like that, though. You can unhitch yourself from that
train and decide how you will respond today, how you will think of what happened
in the past, and how you will handle what happens tomorrow. Mostly, you can’t
control what happens in life – but you can always control how you think about it, the
perspective you take, the story you tell, and how you decide to respond.
As you go throughout your day count how many times you see kindness in
your experience. It can be anywhere, is it between people interacting or maybe you
see it in nature. Maybe you see how kind you are to yourself. This is one thing I’ve
been focused more on lately is doing nice things for myself. If you are not kind to
yourself, who is going to be kind to you? :)
Keep a scorecard of how many times you see kindness. If you start to notice
more kind things throughout the day, this is normal. Remember, wherever our
attention rests we get more of that.
Practice #11: Use Your Senses
“If you worry about what might be, and wonder what might have been, you will
ignore what is.”
Unknown
It’s so easy to get caught up in our thoughts, thinking about anything other
than the current moment, even shutting off our senses so we can continue to think
and worry. Think about how many times you’ve tuned out what’s going on around
you so you could focus about your worries. It happens! Add to that how we’re on our
phones, checking social media, and surrounded by others who are doing the same,
and it’s no wonder we’re not in the moment! It sounds so natural to use your senses
to experience your life – but it actually takes focus to master, and it’s a
super-powerful way to practice looking outward.
Try this the next time you sit down for a meal. Use your senses, and really
take in the whole experience. What do you see? Look at the colors, the shapes, the
lighting, the room you’re in, the people you’re with. What do you hear? Is there
music playing? Listen to the sound your food makes in your mouth, the
conversation, the sounds of people enjoying themselves. What do you feel? Pay
attention to the temperature and texture of the food, the place you’re sitting, the
feeling of your clothing on your body, the utensils in your hand. What do you smell?
Notice the scent of your food, the spices and ingredients that were combined to
make this meal. What do you taste? Become aware of the flavors and how they play
off of each other. Where does each bite hit your taste buds to make this meal
delicious?
It can take practice doing something as simple as using your five senses. But
when you master this, and the ability to be fully present, you’ll find there are even
more senses and delights to discover.
You could even try on your “Wow Goggles” and see how what you see
changes. It’s just like when you wear sunglasses on a bright day. Without them, you
might not be able to see all you need to see. Instead of just walking around, stuck in
your head and listening to the mental chatter that goes on and on about how you
should have done this, or how you’d better worry about that, and what if you
messed this up, etc. be mindful about being in the present moment.
Observe what’s around you, using all of your senses. Take notice of your
environment, of what is beautiful, of all that is around you. Reflect on what an
amazing gift it is to be right here, right now. This will not only help you snap
yourself out of your head and into the moment, but it will also raise your vibration
as you recognize that moment as a gift. It’s a practice that also sets you up to receive
even more from the Universe because you’re noticing and appreciating what’s
already right there.
Here’s the challenge I’d like to offer. Find something today that “wows” or
amazes you. It could be anything – you get to choose. Then share it on social media
and add the hashtag #wowgoggles. If anyone asks you what that is, tell them and
pass the challenge along!
Practice #12: Forgiveness
“Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got.”
Robert Brault
Have you ever heard of Viktor Frankl? He wrote a great book called Man’s
Search for Meaning. It’s a book that talked about what might be one of the worst
experiences people have gone through – being a prisoner in a Nazi concentration
camp during World War II. He lost everyone: parents, brother, pregnant wife,
friends. He was stripped of everything he owned, including his own basic human
dignity.
It’s hard to even imagine the extent of the suffering he endured. It would be
easy to imagine him emerging from the experience a bitter, angry, and tormented
man. But he realized there was just one thing his captors could not take: his choice
about how he would respond to his situation. Viktor Frankl decided that he would
focus every ounce of his energy on that one thing he still owned. It was the gap
between what happened and how he responded to it.
We all go through some tough times. For some, that’s putting it mildly. Some
people endure torture, chronic pain, horrible poverty, and emotional abuse. My own
childhood was filled with experiences no child should ever have to go through. It
would be so easy to see that kind of start of someone’s story and predict that the
ending would be not much better.
With a beginning like that, you’d expect the rest of the path to be marked by
anger, pain, anxiety, loneliness, fear, depression, and physical, mental, and spiritual
imbalances. In fact, it’s common for a cycle to get started where emotional and
physical pain triggers negative thoughts and feelings, which turn around and cause
more emotional and physical pain.
It doesn’t have to be like that! No matter what – or who – caused your
suffering, or how long you’ve been stuck in the cycle of pain, you don’t have to stay
stuck in it.
One of the biggest moments of my life came when I forgave my father for all
of the abuse I went through as a child. In fact, I was tortured and neglected so much
so, that it was hard for me to get adopted because I was labeled with the term
“emotionally damaged.” Luckily, my life turned around, and rather than continuing
in the direction I seemed destined to go, I have turned that unsettling situation into
something great that can help other people heal. My first step in healing this
situation was forgiveness. I want to encourage you to do the same.
Your feelings and emotions will not kill you. Separate yourself from your emotions. That’s what it means to have true power.
Here’s the thing, though. You can’t get out of that cycle by pretending it
doesn’t exist. You can’t get out if you won’t at least entertain the idea that you could
learn to respond to pain in a different way than you always have. You can’t get out if
you’d rather stick with pain that’s become familiar rather than being open to
change.
This practice may be a tough one for you. Remember, I’m here to support you
emotionally, physically, spiritually, and socially as you transform your life. I’ve dealt
with this one I’m about to share for the vast majority of my own life. If you’re
holding on to the past and your story as well, let go of it. Forgive any person,
situation, trial, or tribulation that’s held you back from being your all – that higher
version of yourself you know you could be. You’ve experienced this higher version
before, maybe during those times you’ve been in a flow state, doing or being
something great that comes so naturally to you. Part of your total life transformation
is about becoming that higher version of yourself.
But to be your all, you have to let go of your story – that story about what
happened to you, about who hurt you, about the troubles you’ve faced that are
keeping you down. You are not your story. The longer you hold onto it, the longer it
will take to become who you are meant to be, your true self.
When you let go of the story, you see the world differently, through these
magical eyes that notice the wonder of all that’s around you, filling you with love
and appreciation for yourself and those around you as well. The more you observe
the world that way, the more magical your life becomes. As soon as you let go of
your story, your life will begin to change.
Here’s an exercise that will help you through the curve of forgiveness. Write
a letter (or, multiple letters, if needed) to someone you need to forgive. You know
who they are. This exercise is very emotionally charged. Anticipate feeling the
weight of whatever it is you’ve been holding onto slip off your shoulder.
If that person is alive, mail it if you want to. If that person isn’t alive, burn the
letter during a full moon and sacrifice a goat.
TOTALLY KIDDING – I love goats! In fact, click to watch this cute goat video.
Looking Upward
“Life is a process of becoming. A combination of states we have to go through.
Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of
death.”
Anais Nin
What would it be like for you if could focus in on your gifts, skills, and talents
– everything that makes you… you, and live as a truly authentic being right here and
right now, completely in the present? What would it be like if you lived a life free of
worry and fear? What if you never again spent the night lying in bed feeling anxious
about what was coming tomorrow – or what happened in the past?
What will it be like when you shift your focus upward, embracing all the
greatness that God and the Universe have in store for you? Are you ready for that?
Are you ready to learn some practices that will absolutely transform how you relate
with all that is bigger than you?
Now that we’ve looked inward and outward, it’s time to look upward. When
you do, here are just a few benefits you’ll begin to experience:
● The joy of practicing being present.
● You’ll begin to notice the amazing gifts that are right there in front of
you.
● You’ll feel stress and unhappiness caused by needless worry slipping
away.
● You’ll begin to feel a sense of peace as you live in the present rather
than the past or future.
It’s stressful to live in the past or the future, going over and over what went
wrong or what could go wrong. Part of what keeps people from growing, from
becoming all they were meant to be, is that they are so consumed with worry that
they shift into autopilot rather than being truly present in their lives – and the sad
thing is, then they miss out on all the joy and magic of the current moment.
Shifting into autopilot instead of being present can also lead you to feel down
– and not even know why! In fact, most of the time when you’re feeling down, it’s for
something different than you think it is. Half the time when you’re stressed out
about something, it’s really just stress from something deeper or more important.
When you shift into autopilot so you can crawl up into your head to worry rather
than being present, it’s likely you’ll fall into old patterns that no longer serve you
without even noticing it was happening.
Let me give you an example: You’re worried about work. Someone cuts you
off in traffic, and you find yourself getting unreasonably angry with him. You find
yourself bubbling up with anger, maybe clutching the wheel of the car a little bit.
Now imagine stopping your stream of bad thoughts, and just taking a breath.
Do it with me for real: Stop your train of thought, and just take a breath.
That guy who cut you off in traffic probably isn’t the source of your stress.
Maybe the job you’re heading to isn’t fulfilling your goals and dreams for yourself.
The car you’re driving could be something you purchased because you felt
pressured to show signs of success. That stress may be telling you that it’s time for a
change!
So many people get caught in vicious circles in life. I’m not talking about
everyday routines, like going to work, coming home, and then going to work again
the next day. Those happen, sure – and they can help to fulfill our needs for certainty
in life. But when your routine begins to feel like a rut, it can become problematic if
you don’t experience enough uncertainty to keep life interesting. We’re talking
about something destructive – when your emotions get caught in a vicious circle and
leads to chaos.
When your perspective just becomes a constant circle of chaos, it’s time to
take a step back. You need to readjust your mindset and thank about what’s really
causing your perspective to be shaken up. The world is not against you. Your
perspective’s just causing it to look like it is. If you slipped into autopilot mode
rather than being truly present in the moment, that didn’t help!
Being present in your own life, right now, right here – that’s one of the most
powerful tools for change that you can use. I’m going to share some tips for
becoming more present. These are tools I use myself, all the time – and when I don’t,
I really notice the difference! If you’ve ever felt so distracted that you didn’t catch
the name of someone you just met, or if just hours after eating a meal, you can’t even
remember tasting your food – that’s evidence that you just weren’t present at the
time. Think of all you’re missing out on if you’re not present in your life!
Stay present. No dwelling in the past, and don’t rob today of its joy by worrying about the future.
Practice #13: Your Life, By Design
“Miracles start to happen when you give as much energy to your dreams as you
do to your fears.”
Richard Wilkins
Feeling positive no matter what will become like second nature to you. You’ll
be astonished by what shows up in your life, too – people, events, and opportunities
will start to appear to support you in reaching your dreams. It doesn’t matter what
your life is like right now; this will work. But knowing about the practice I’m about
to share with you isn’t enough. You have to commit to this ritual and really do it for
it to work.
You might not believe this kind of perspective is even possible for you. You
might feel so beaten down by life that it seems like nothing will ever change. That
brings us to another piece of the positivity puzzle.
You may be surrounded by people who communicate to you in no uncertain
terms that you’re not enough, that you’re not going to win in life, that you’re
worthless and hopeless. You may have heard them saying this – silently or with
words – so often, and for so long that part of you actually believes they’re right. They
say we are the average of our five closest friends, in how happy we are, in how fit we
are, in how spiritual we are, in how much money we make – in every way you can
measure your life. If you take a close look at the people closest to you, you might be
a little alarmed to see how this law is working out in your life.
We all send out energy vibrations. Some send positive vibrations out into the
universe, and others send out gloomy, negative vibes all day, every day. These
vibrations attract other similar vibrations – like attracts like. So if you’re going
around with a positive vibration emanating from you, you’re attracting even more
positive vibrations: positive people, positive circumstances, positive opportunities.
But the same is true if you are putting out a negative vibration. Some people actually
refer to that kind of vibration as becoming a crap magnet. Filled with frustration and
negativity, you complain, and then next thing you know, you have even more
negativity heaped on you.
What do you think that says about the importance of choosing the people
closest to you carefully? Lasting transformation involves making changes to your
environment – and that may include the people you allow closest to your heart and
soul and mind. They are impacting you, vibrating with you, and if you choose wisely,
you can create a life where you and those closest to you each raise each other’s
vibration.
Remember that what others think of you is irrelevant. I guarantee, especially once you start this process of transformation, some people will
think you’re crazy – it’s happened with some of my friends, too! That’s okay – just be yourself rather than trying to please everyone else.
That’s how you can become even more positive, vibrating at an
ever-increasing frequency. That’s how you become someone who truly radiates
love, who feels a powerful connection with others and who experiences an elevated
level of consciousness.
This kind of positivity starts with being able to love yourself. It means maybe
talking to yourself differently than you ever have before. It means being able to tell
yourself you love yourself. This is really hard for some people to do, but it is so
powerful in how it helps to transform your mind and life. The word ‘love’ is such a
powerful word because it bypasses your conscious mind and sinks right into your
subconscious mind, impacting you at the deepest levels.
So here is a practice I’d like you to work through. It’s called my 7-Minutes
Exercise. (That number is flexible! You can take as long as you like to work through
it.) Ready? Here’s what you’ll do.
Each night, you’re going to spend some time before you go to sleep just
cleaning out your subconscious mind. You’re going to think about what you want to
affirm, and bring it into your experience. Think about everything that happened
during the day, and reflect on it with gratitude – whether you thought it was a good
thing or a bad thing, either way, look at it with gratitude. Everything in your day
gives you the opportunity to grow, to become a better person. This is an opportunity
to demonstrate gratitude for all of the lessons and experiences you had throughout
the day.
Next, spend a few minutes scripting your next day. Think about what’s
coming up for you tomorrow, the opportunities you know are coming, and those
that you don’t know about yet, too. What you’re doing is scripting out what you
want to see happen in the next day, who will play a part in it, what will be said, what
outcomes you’ll see.
Enjoy visualizing exactly how it feels as this script plays out. For each of the
scenarios you choose, use all of your senses – how does it look, feel, sound, smell,
taste as you watch the scenario play out? Tap into the power of your imagination.
Believe me, when you do this as part of your nightly ritual, it’s more powerful
than you’d imagine – especially when you make each scenario super-vivid. When
you make this practice part of your nightly ritual, I guarantee you will experience a
total turnaround. It works every time. If you feel like you’re on the verge of a
breakdown, and you start practicing this ritual every night, you’ll start to see it’s
more like you’re on the verge of a breakthrough – and it won’t be long, just a few
weeks, before you become the champion of your own life.
Practice #14: Incantation
“Children see magic because they look for it.”
Christopher Moore
There’s a practice I do that helps me love myself more and more, and I want
to share it with you. It’s called Incantation. You exhale four times, quickly. Then
make a statement that has four syllables. For example, I sometimes say, “I love my
life” when I do this. Your energy will start to rise right away. Your mind will start to
change, and then, believe it or not, your outside world and circumstances will start
to change, too.
Why does this work so well? Because it’s all about recreating that sense of
being in love – with yourself. Think about when you’ve seen someone who’s in love.
They practically glow. Their vibration is so strong that their feelings seem to be
contagious. That same “in love” experience you might have with another person is
possible to choose in your relationship with yourself. You can put yourself into that
in-love state instantly. That’s because love is a choice, not a feeling. One of the best
books I’ve ever read on this topic is from one of my good friends Kumal Ravikant.
You can take that experience to another level by adding a physical anchor.
Anytime you can anchor your body to a thought you choose by doing a simple
motion, it will be more powerful for you. I do this every time before speaking on
stage or getting in front of a camera.
Here’s what you do. Snap your finger once. This snap will pull you out of your
own head and bring you into the present. Then spend a few moments – or as long as
you need to, you’ll get faster at this with practice – thinking of moments when you
really felt loved. You might even imagine being able to see through a window to a
crowd of the people who love you most, and they’re staring back at you with
complete love. Anchor that feeling with a second finger snap.
Then you’ll carry with you the overwhelming feeling of the presence of
people who love you. It’s such a powerful tool because it allows you to clear your
mind of whatever else might be distracting you, and shift into a vibration of love
instead.
It doesn’t matter how positive or negative you are right now in your life.
Maybe this is all new to you. Or maybe you’ve experienced the power of this positive
vibration before, but know you’d like to be able to experience it more, whenever you
want to, in fact. You can do this! You may not believe in yourself – but I believe in
you. Maybe even more than you believe in yourself.
I’d love to hear how this simple positivity turnaround tool changes your life!
Connect with me on Facebook and tell me about your experience.
Practice #15: Meditative Conditioning “Visualize this thing that you want, see it, feel it, believe in it. Make your mental
blueprint, and begin to build.”
Robert Collier
Meditative Conditioning is a way of brining into your awareness all of the
good in the world, bringing your awareness to a higher power outside of you. It has
the power to bring what you imagine, what you create in your own mind into your
real world experience. The great thing about this practice is that you can use it to
help you manifest your dreams and accomplish your goals. The tricky part is that if
you’re not using this tool to serve your highest good, you may be accidentally using
it to work against you.
It’s like a powerful team of horses, pulling you in a cart wherever you tell
them to go. Knowing that, you probably want to learn how to make it work to help
you, and not to take you further from your goals, right?
This is a tool I’ve been using my whole life, and I think it will really help you,
too. Ready?
Here’s what you do:
Sit in a comfortable seat. Not too comfortable, though. You don’t want to fall
asleep. You may want to position your hands on your thighs, with your pointer
finger and thumb forming a circle, and your other fingers relaxed outward. That’s
the traditional meditation pose for your hands, and it signals to your brain that
you’re about to spend some time in meditative conditioning. Sit up straight so you
are relaxed but alert.
Then close your eyes and begin paying attention to how you are breathing.
You’re going to use about 70% of your lung capacity as you focus on each breath.
Breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth or nose. Take several
breaths like this, and really pay attention to the feeling of the air entering your body,
filling your lungs, and then exiting your body again.
After several breaths, it’s time to start invoking the power of your
imagination. This is a hugely powerful power we have as humans, to imagine what
we can’t see physically. Albert Einstein said, “Imagination is more important than
knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while
imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and
understand,” and I really believe it.
It’s important to use your imagination to work for you – and not against you.
So let’s talk about that for just a moment.
When you practice meditative conditioning, you take a concept from your
mind and bring it to life in your imagination. You see something happening so
vividly that it feels like you’re watching it happen right before your eyes. You hear
the sounds and conversations that would accompany that happening, as if these
sounds were coming right to your ears. You feel sensations and emotions as
intensely as if you were right there going through this experience for real. You may
have sensations of smell and taste, as well. You paint a picture of what you’re
imagining, and step into it with all that you are.
Can you see how important it is to choose what you’ll imagine carefully? If
you are prone to worrying, you’ve probably seen this powerful tool work against
you. You imagine or remember something bad happening, and play out all of the
details in your mind so vividly that it’s like reliving the event – or if it hasn’t even
happened, you may feel negative emotions strong enough to actually make you feel
sick.
What’s funny is that people have no problem believing in the power of this
practice when it comes to conjuring up negative memories or worries. We’ve all
experienced it! But some people have a hard time believing positive meditative
conditioning can be just as powerful.
Trust me, though… it can! I use this tool on a daily basis, and it’s one I reach
for with every goal I set, every meeting I have, every video I shoot – it’s all wrapped
up in my imagination before it ever happens in real time. You might be surprised to
hear how often it all plays out exactly as I imagined it, too!
Bring into your awareness the good in your existence. Think of all the times
an unseen hand has protected you, guided you. Maybe you want to consider your
goals, the people you want to help, the body you want to build, the financial state
you want to create. You want to be able to get a very clear image of what you want
to bring into your experience. It may help you to use pictures or a vision board, or
even a vision movie to help you focus.
Then you’ll begin asking yourself questions. What does it look like? What
does it sound like? Where am I? Visualize yourself in that new body, sense what it
feels like to move without that excess weight. Imagine what it feels like to go to
work at that job you enjoy so much. Picture that relationship you desire. What are
you doing? What sounds do you hear? What does it feel like in your heart? All of this
is attainable! You are enough, you are worthy of creating and enjoying what you’re
imagining. That you can even imagine it is proof that you can manifest it.
You may also find it helpful to ask yourself some specific questions about
what you’re seeing, rather than making statements. You see, if you don’t believe you
can have what you want, at your core, that disruptive voice will pipe up and call BS
on you as you imagine you already have it. Your subconscious beliefs are very
powerful and unreasonable. So you may need a way to work around them if you’re
finding your meditative conditioning sessions are getting derailed by doubts.
Here’s what I do when that happens to me. Instead of making a statement, I
ask a question. I ask it as if I have already achieved that goal, received that blessing,
begun that relationship, or experienced that event just the way I wanted it.
You can ask questions like:
“How was it so easy to release that extra weight?”
“Why am I so happy in my relationship?”
“How did I make so much money so quickly and easily?”
“Why am I sleeping so peacefully at night?”
“How did I get to travel to Scotland for such a wonderful vacation this year?”
“What makes me so magnetic to people?”
“How does it get even better than this?”
“How could my life become even more magical?”
Goal setting is one of the most important skills a person can have in their
mental toolbox. But in terms of maintaining a healthy perspective, the ability to
visualize an ideal is even more important. You need to be able to visualize what you
truly want most in order to have a proper perspective going forward. Now you
know how to use this tool, even when there are parts of your mind that are not yet
fully convinced you can reach that goal.
Let’s practice for just a moment. Pick a goal you have and try imagining that
goal in your mind. Give it as much detail as you possibly can. I know, it feels
indulgent. It feels awkward. But keep going. If you’re getting stuck or getting too
much pushback from your inner critic, try asking yourself positive questions like we
just looked at.
Here’s an example to help guide you: Publishing a book is one of many
people’s life goals. So if I were coaching them in imagining publishing a book, I
would tell them to imagine feeling the weight of the book in their hands. Does it
have a hard cover, or is it paperback? What do the pages smell like? When you open
the book up, what do you see? What does your name look like on that title page?
And beyond the book, what does the life of a writer look like to you? Do you
imagine working on your next book after that one? How do you tell people about
“your book”? I would tell that person to add as much detail to that one image as they
can. Visualize to the greatest extent of your ability.
Do this for each of the goals you’ve written down, one by one. Isn’t it amazing
how that feels? I bet you’re feeling a lot more optimistic about potentially achieving
those goals after that. By picturing them in such detail, you’re able to put positive
vibrations into the world, and therefore set yourself up to attract those goals into
your life.
More than that attraction, however, visualization about the future can help
you see the positive things that are going on in your life already. By re-filling
yourself with hope for the future, you’re better able to appreciate the present. And
this mindset starts you on a good and healthy mindset.
Pay attention to the solutions, not the problems, as you ask your “Why”
questions. This one was big for me in the process of my transformation. Far too
often it is easy to get wrapped up into the problems of your life. Start to take note
and recognize all of the solutions that you have access to. What helps me is to make
a list of all of the things that start showing up as a solution.
Once you turn your awareness to this level of understanding more of these
solutions will start coming to you. First, it will seem a little bit like a fairytale or
watching a movie but be patient, because this will be how you live your life.
Stop trying to force solutions and let the Universe deliver to you exactly what
you need. Simple. You can even help yourself become more aware of this by putting
it on paper. Draw a line across the middle of a piece of paper. Write “Opportunities”
up top on one side and “Solutions” on the other. Go through the “Why” questions
practice, and write the solutions as they come to you.
What’s really great is that you can also do this with other people, supporting
each other through visualization. Is there someone you could partner up with to
share this tool with so you can help each other visualize reaching your goals – and
then celebrate when you see them become reality?
You can use this powerful tool anytime you want, and I hope you’ll take
notice of the results you create with it. It’s too easy to chalk your results up to
chance or coincidence if you aren’t really paying attention. But you know better than
that now, so you’ll know when you reach these goals you’ve been picturing that you
used your own imagination to bring them into reality.
I’d love to celebrate your success with you. In fact, if you upload a video of
yourself sharing your success story to www.WhydentityWall.com/Celebrate [NOTE:
BUILD THIS!] you’ll have a chance to win a free coaching session with the FitLife
team. When you share your story, you’ll also encourage others who are on the path
to total transformation as well.
Practice #16: Abundance
“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in in
having new eyes.”
Marcel Proust
Alright my friend, now we’re really digging in deep. No doubt, you’ve begun
to really catch a glimpse of what’s possible to create in your life. You’ve got some
powerful practices you’re learning to use to connect with the Infinite so that you can
be, do, and have more in your life. You’re learning to break free from the stuff that
used to keep you stuck in those old familiar ruts.
It’s exciting, isn’t it? You’re beginning to see the infinite possibilities that are
practically swirling through the air right in front of you – how you really can
transform yourself, body, mind, and spirit. You’re beginning to realize how the false
limitations you’ve always lived with just don’t matter anymore. The sky really is the
limit!
With that excitement, though, you’re probably going to find some part of
your mind starting to push back. It might feel crazy, like you’ve got two voices trying
to out-shout each other in your mind. One says, “You really CAN change your life,
living a life that overflows with joy, power, peace, connection, a life where you have
everything you need – right at your fingertips!” The other voice says, “No way,” and
tries to give you a long list of why that abundant life is never going to happen.
That voice is your limiting beliefs. We all have them – me, too! These are
thoughts that we adopt at some point early on in our lives. They mean well, in a way
– they served a purpose at some point, trying to help protect us from some hard
knocks in life. But there comes a time when we recognize that they’re holding us
back, that they’re not accurate, that they’re not serving our highest interests, and
that they’re keeping us from making an epic contribution in the lives of people
around us.
Are you ready to take them on? To have the kind of “new eyes” that let you
see the true abundance of possibilities that are right there in front of you? To smash
the power of those fear-driven limiting beliefs so they no longer control you?
Then let’s turn your fear into fuel, so you can see clearly how everything in
your life has worked together to bring you to this point, how you’ve always been
taken care of along the way – even when it might have looked like you weren’t at the
time, how you’ve got infinite possibilities within reach, and how you truly are the
master of your own destiny.
How do your limiting beliefs sound? Maybe they whisper (or shout!)
something like this:
● You can’t do this, or be this, or have this, because you are not enough.
● Sure, you might be able to have what you want, but it’s going to be HARD
work.
● You? You don’t deserve (whatever it is you desire).
● Ha! You could have that, IF you were lucky… but you’re not.
Any of those sound familiar?
What’s crazy about limiting beliefs is that they sound so reasonable. In fact,
there are probably people in your life who’ve said these things to you – and they
may even mean well, trying to protect you from disappointment, or to make sure
you “keep your feet on the ground”. But what really happens is that these limiting
beliefs soak into your mind and soul, and end up preventing you from going after
what you really desire, what you could easily accomplish if you had a clearer view of
who you really are, and what’s truly possible. They stand between you and the
abundant life you’ve envisioned – the life you can easily live… if you can get past
them.
I want to encourage you to determine that you will no longer go along with
these limiting beliefs. Become vigilant about your thought life. The next time you
catch yourself in a limiting belief, take action and work through this practice.
Here’s a three-step process you can use to get over your limiting beliefs.
Ready?
Step One: Hear it… but don’t agree with it.
First, catch yourself stating the belief, AND consciously understand that it is
just a thought, it’s not part of you. It’s a belief that is now irrelevant to your life. It’s
from the past, like an old piece of luggage that you don’t have to carry anymore. You
have permission to drop it; you don’t have to bring it with you.
Step Two: Apply logic.
Next, imagine what you could create in your life if you let go of this particular
limiting belief. What’s at stake if you insist on carrying this belief? What becomes
possible if you’ll unloaded this baggage? What fitness goals could you reach? How
about in your work and finances? What might be possible in your relationships? In
the contribution you make in others’ lives? What could you accomplish this year, or
in a decade, or in the whole rest of your life? If that limiting belief became
neutralized, what would be possible? In fact, what if the OPPOSITE of that limiting
belief were true? What logical conclusion can you draw about the possibilities in
your life now that you know that limiting belief no longer applies?
Step Three: Test your barriers.
Once you become aware of what your personal limiting beliefs are, it’s time
to smash them. Choose one that’s holding you back and look at it, head-on – and test
it. You’ll see that it’s a fake barrier after all.
Ask yourself what it would cost you to hold onto that limiting belief. Identify
a much more empowering belief you could hold as an alternative, then declare that
from this moment forward this new, powerful belief is the one you’ll hold onto. Back
up this declaration by listing all the reasons why it’s true. Think of the investments
you’ve made in yourself, in your education, in your training, in your personal
development, in how you’ve learned and grown and transformed yourself. These are
proof of your commitment and qualification to be, to do, to have, and to give exactly
what you’re calling into your life.
You’ve got amazing gifts to give the world. You are truly gifted – just because
you are YOU, and because of the path you’ve traveled and all that you’ve learned.
These are proof of abundance in your life – an amazing set of resources you carry
with you that make everything possible.
Look at the abundance of resources in and around you, and take that
awareness with you as you play a bigger game in life. You’ve got everything you
could possibly need – and more – right at your command. You can make a huge
difference in the world just by being you!
Practice# 17: Connectedness
“True communication is communion – the realization of oneness, which is love.”
Eckhart Tolle
After questioning thousands of our coaching clients over the past three years,
we realize that the number one thing that impacts people on a cellular level, more
than anything else, is that giving them an opportunity to participate in a community
that is unbiased, non-judgmental, loving, kind, and full of unconditional love. That’s
essentially what we’ve created!
So, people in our community connect by posting comments that are
vulnerable, inspiring, right from their hearts. Most of the time, it’s got nothing to do
with transforming their physical body, but has everything to do with transforming
their minds on the deepest levels. Once you can have those breakthroughs in your
mind, your body will follow. It helps to connect with others, to see where they’ve
been and where they’re going now.
It’s the Roger Bannister Effect at work. He’s the guy who ran the first
sub-four minute mile, back when nobody thought it was possible. Once he broke
through this barrier, proving it was possible, everything changed. One runner after
another broke that four minute mile, showing again and again what was truly
possible.
That’s what’s happened in our community. Over and over again, people see
the transformation others have created, and discover the confidence they need to
create that same change in their own lives. Seeing what’s truly possible puts
transformation within your reach!
Recognize that you are part of something larger than yourself. Connect to
others so we can all witness what’s possible. Realize that in this community, people
have your back. You are surrounded by others who stand in support of you as you
go after your highest good in life.
You don’t have to go it alone! Tap into the full poser of community, of being
in this together, and witnessing the infinite possibilities of the Universe.
In this practice, I’m challenging you to join a community of people who are
also on this path of lifelong transformation and contribution. Then go through the
practices you’ve just learned again WITH someone. Teach them to someone else,
share your experience, and pay attention to the added strength you feel as you grow
together.
All 17 of the practices you’ve just begun by going through this book will work
together to make you stronger – in your relationship with yourself, in your
relationship with others, and in your relationship with the Infinite. You’ll begin
seeing massive changes in how your body feels and works, how your mind dreams
and thinks and speaks to you, how you connect with other people, and how you
experience the Universe.
We truly are all in this together!
Parting Thoughts
“The human heart has a way of making itself large again even after it's been
broken into a million pieces.”
Robert James Waller
If there’s one thing I can pass on to you all, it’s that you really can transform
your life, no matter what it’s like today. It’s never too late. You can heal from
harmful events in your past, no matter how badly they hurt you. You don’t have to
stay in that painful space. It may take time and effort, but healing is always possible.
Friend, remember that progress usually isn’t linear in fashion – it’s more like
a winding path that sometimes feels like you’re going backward as you go. Be kind
to yourself along that path. Each day, take time to look back and recognize your
progress. Each small step is worth celebrating, so be sure to notice and let yourself
get excited about where you’re headed. Let go of that perfectionism that leads you to
be unkind to yourself and instead celebrate how far you’ve come!
Progress takes time and consistency – it’s not an overnight, flip-the-switch
kind of deal. I’ve introduced you to some powerful practices in this book, and hope
you’ve really worked through them. They’re called practices for a reason! Just like if
you were learning to play guitar or speak another language, it takes practice and
dedication to hone your craft. Bring all the passion you’ve got and focus it on this
journey. This is your life you’re talking about! Pursue it with everything in you!
There may be some days where it feels like you’re really struggling. I get that,
friend. There were moments in my life where I thought I would never heal from
what had been done to me as a child. But just as my burns from the cigarettes
healed, so did the rest of me. I made healing a priority, and it turned into my life’s
work.
Most of my life has been spent working on healing myself. Even today, it is a
consistent effort. But it gives me joy to pass on what I’ve learned to you all, because
we are all in this together. When one of us becomes happier in their life, we are all
happier. Appreciation makes way for more appreciation, and happiness leads to
more happiness.
If you feel like you can never heal from a traumatic event in your life, or even
if you just need a friend, please feel free to call on me. I always make time for the
people who need it most. It’s always rewarding to help something through a tough
spot, let them know that they’re not alone in their journey.
We are all healing from something. We all give off energy and vibrations that
affect our world and our own futures. We all have power, and we all have the power
to heal ourselves. That power lies precisely in the mindset you see the world
through. If it lies dormant, it guides our lives in a boring, unsatisfying direction that
only perpetuates pain. But if that power is harnessed, it can be used to not only
improve the life of one person but that of everyone they come across.
As you go through your transformation and begin to see the results, you may
begin to have this fear that it won’t last. Maybe that’s happened before – you lost
weight only to regain it and then some. Maybe you’ve experienced a similar pattern
in relationships, and you’re not sure you really can transform how you relate to
others. Maybe it’s felt like you’ve made progress in healing from your past before,
and sooner or later the wounds resurfaced.
Here’s the thing, though – we are all human, and we all make mistakes. We all
have setbacks, and this time is different. You don’t have to know all the answers. You
don’t have to understand everything. You could spend your whole life learning and
never understand everything about what it takes to create a total, lifelong
transformation. It’s not that you read my book and now magically you’re healed. It’s
not that you now have information you didn’t have before.
It’s different because this time you’re taking action. You’re seeing food as fuel
rather than a way to numb your feelings or soothe yourself when you need comfort.
You’re opening yourself up to the accountability that comes from sharing your story
with a group of people who are also in the process of transformation. You’ve felt
how wonderful it feels to take steps to grow, to become healthy, to change at every
level. You’ve turned to your Whydentity over and over to the point where it has
become part of you, and you wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world.
I wish all of you a lifetime of growing and healing, and I hope the tools in this
book help you through whatever you may be facing. We’re all in this together. And
I’m proud to be a part of your personal journey! I can’t wait to hear your
transformation story!
What’s Next?
My intention is that this book showed you how to control and monitor your
thoughts, feelings and emotions to elicit a favorable response in your reality
creation. It was our goal in writing this to help you truly understand that life is not
meant to be a struggle and you can be, do, and have anything your heart desires.
Hope and education will only get you so far in this life; you need to have faith and
take radical action.
I want to encourage you, like so many of my mentors have told me, to reflect
back on the process and the growth that you’ve made along the way.
The testing that you did when going through this book is to serve as a marker
for growth. I know I’ve finished many books in my life but had nothing tangible
when I finished. The Whydentity practices were set in place to show you how much
you’ve expanded. Like the Trophy Room chapter in this book - we have to spend
time being kind and loving to ourselves.
Feel free to revisit this book as often as you like. I’m working on a series of
books like this one that will push you outside your comfort zone and help you
transcend any limiting illusions you have in life.
If you feel like this book helped you in any way, please leave a review on
Amazon here. LINK The more reviews we get here the more people we can impact
with this type of information.
I’ve also put together a video course with additional tools and practices you
can implement to help you in your journey. Check that out here. LINK
I have other books on Amazon and more programs to help you as well.
NEED LINKS
Coaching
Juicing Recipes
Train Your Taste
Juice With Drew
My Favorite Green Juice Supplement
Will You Do Me a Favor?
I hope this book has been helpful to you as you travel on the path of
transformation. It’s such an honor to hear FitLifers’ success stories, and even the
struggles as well. That’s what’s so great about being in this together – getting to
share the journey together.
If you’ve begun to experience transformation as you read this book, or you’ve
regained the hope you can experience a lasting transformation, or even if you’ve
picked up some tools that will help you along the way in your own journey, would
you do me a huge favor?
It would mean so much to me if you’d leave a review of this book on
Amazon.com. People really do read the reviews there before they decide to pick up a
book, and they will hear your voice so much more clearly than they could ever hear
mine. Why? Because they’ll trust your honest opinion. They know you’re not part of
the FitLife team. You didn’t write the book, and didn’t publish it, so you have no
reason not to give them the real scoop on it.
Would you do that for me? It will help me accomplish my goal of helping as
many people as I possibly can. Thank you so much!