dear younger me...a mother's day post

Dear Younger Me…

What would YOU say….if time travel were possible, and you had the opportunity? How would you encourage or advise your younger self…knowing what you know now?

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Dear 17-year-old me: The cancer will not come back in 5

or 10 years, not even 30! Someone

will love you for who you are and the

scars will not matter to him. You will

get past your fear of having children

and passing the cancer on to them.

You will get married and have 2

wonderful children and God will be

forever present in your life...you will

be truly blessed!Love, Angie (Current Age: 46)

Dear 20-year-old me,

Don't take this the wrong way,

but you are clueless. You have no

idea what the meaning of life is,

but, trust me, you will start on the

path to figuring it out after your

brother dies. Life will be full of

many heartaches and triumphs,

but put your faith and trust in God

and he will see you through all of

them. Love,Heather (Current Age: 40)

PS--You'll never believe this--you

are going to become one of those

Jesus freaks :)


Because you love the Lord, does not mean you MUST lead a ladies Bible study, head up the education committee at church, teach Sunday School each week, and mentor four young mothers while you raise your own family. Take time to pray and listen for guidance from the Holy Spirit.

I doubt that all your activities were intended for you at this age.

Love,Jean (Current Age: 68)

Dear 25-year-old me, I’m hesitant to offer you any specific advice because if you actually take it, your life might turn out dramatically different than it is. And frankly, your future life is good—you have a husband who loves you and three great kids. You are happy. Part of your happiness comes from your good attitude—you’re doing that right, so keep it up. However, you could still use more mental toughness. There are naysayers and negative people everywhere. You’ve already noticed that, but you haven’t yet realized what damage they can do. These people are negative about everything, and their words make you question your own dreams and goals. For example, you have already completed your college degree, and you have been working in your field for 3 years now. Unfortunately, you’ve discovered that it was the wrong choice, and you don’t know what to do next. Some things that you are interested in, you hear people say negative things about…

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… It’s too expensive, it’s boring, you’ll never get a job, it’s too stressful, etc. Remember though, these people don’t have your same aspirations, and they don’t pay your bills. They make their offhand comments and move on. You, however, have to make decisions and live your life. Don’t make major life decisions based on flippant comments. Some of the naysayers are family members or even close friends. They want to tell you what to do with your life. Be careful about listening to them. Have you noticed that they haven’t asked you what you want, but rather they assume that they know? Don’t let them push you in directions that you don’t want. Be your own woman. It’s all right to take suggestions from others, but only if they are well thought out. Remember—the ultimate decision is yours, and you are the one who has to live with your choices.


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Finally, you are not too old to make any changes. I know you think you are, but someday, believe it or not, you’ll think 25-year-olds are young and inexperienced. Also, time will pass, no matter what you do. One day, you’ll be 30. Someday, you’ll be 40. Do you want to be in the same place you are now, or do you want to use that time working towards your goals? Love, Me (Current Age: 43)

Dear 25-year-old me, Do not be in such a hurry for your kids to go throughthe different growing up stages. Before you know it they are grown up and making their own lives. Just enjoy every moment with them.Love, Jeniffer (Current Age: 46)

Dear 18-year-old me, Don't be so self-conscious. You think everybody is looking at you and judging you, but they're really self-conscious about themselves. They're looking at you and wondering how THEY measure up against YOU. Love, Susan (Current Age: 49)

Dear 8-year-old me, Good and exciting things will happen for you in life. Good and exciting things will also happen for your friends. When something great happens for a friend, be genuinely happy for them! This is their moment in the sunshine….help them enjoy it to the fullest without selfishly thinking that you deserve something great too. Your turn will come. This is an incredibly important lesson that will carry you throughout life. You won’t get the lead in every school play, you won’t be named to the All Star team for every sport, you won’t always get the best score on a test…


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…Sometimes others will get those honors and when they do, no amount of pouting or thinking that “it should have been me” will change the situation. Put a smile on your face and congratulate that person. Putting this lesson in to action will bring you great joy throughout your life! Love, Tara (Current Age: 39)

Dear 49-year-old me,Continue giving loving support to your husband as he hunts for a new career. Building him up at this crucial time will help him more than your criticism. Love,Shirley (Current Age: 92)


Take time to memorize and treasure the craggy old faces that love, nurture, teach, encourage, and yes correct you, for someday you will wish you could trace those imperfections that make up who you are today.

Those are the faces fashioned by the great creator with his personal and exquisite touch and the youthful face you see will fade but the beauty of life will be sculpted by your character.Love, Judy (Current Age: 56)

Dear 15-year-old me,You are beautiful just the way God created you. You don't need to worry yourself with trying to look like someone else. God designed you to be special in every way. And He is way more interested in your heart than in your weight or your outward appearance. The fun magazines you sometimes look through are full of articles and pictures that can be dangerous to your mind. Those people who seem to have it all on the outside are sometimes empty and hurting and broken on the inside. Don't waste your time wishing you looked different. Instead, look to God's view of who you are. Fill your mind with His truth. Be an encourager to others. God is your creator. He is your forever friend. You delight Him just by being YOU. Love,Me (Current Age: 40)

Dear 38-year-old me:My husband tells me we have to leave our beautiful home in Illinois with its grand oak trees and green, green grass for a move to Boise, Idaho. It also means leaving my sweet recently widowed mother and taking her 2 grandsons and only granddaughter away. My heart is breaking. I've seen Boise. It's ugly. They say you can see the mountains, but the two times we visited I never saw them. Once, in the hot summer, there was so much haze the mountains were invisible. Again in the winter there was so much fog that the pilot wasn't certain we could take off for our return to Chicago. Mountains? Ha! And wherever I look I see pickup trucks with gun racks and big dogs riding in the truck beds. I would say, most definitely, this is not a city filled the culture I've been used to!! - no symphony orchestra, no Brookfield Zoo, no Museum of Science & Industry, no touring Broadway shows, no Art Institute, not even decent shopping! …


(Continued…)…Everyone seems to shop via catalogs! But our house has sold and there is no turning back. My husband is a man of his word, he says he made a promise to his employer, and so I honor him for that and for the man he is. I realize I have two choices: I can either be miserable and make the whole family miserable, OR I can have an attitude of excitement -- we're going on an adventure. We don't have to stay there forever, after all. Maybe just a few years.... And so we're on our way, leaving Chicago in a blizzard on the 4th of March. Arriving in Boise, the sun is shining, the temperature is in the 60s, and, YES, there are mountains! As the movers are carrying our stuff into our lovely new house, I look out the kitchen window and quickly call to my husband to come and look at what I see…


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…Bogus Basin is covered with sparkling white snow against a backdrop of the most brilliant blue sky I've ever seen. I tell my husband, “This is so beautiful. I think we'll retire here!” He looks at me and says, “Are you crazy?” So, 38-year-old me, now 36 years have passed, you've grown much older and hopefully much wiser.

Love, Elvia (Current Age: 74)

Dear 74-year-old me, Here you are, still living in Boise and filled with contentment and joy. Little did you know that within 6 months of your arrival your mother would sell her home of 40 years and move to Boise (because she really LIKED it!) Little did you know that you were in for the surprise of your life when you gave birth to daughter #2 at age 44! (That's a story in itself!) Little did you know that your 4 children would excel academically and professionally (well, maybe you did have a clue about that!), but you didn't know that all of them and their families would end up living in the Northwest. Little did you know what an outstanding university (and football team!) would develop…


(Continued…) …what a first-class philharmonic orchestra Boise would have, or an opera company, or ballet, or wonderful art museum, that the historical museum would "come to life" every September, that Zoo Boise would grow and obtain many exotic animals, and that during the summer and fall you would enjoy the Capital City Farmers' market on Saturday mornings. And then there's the breathtakingly beautiful scenery that surrounds us in Idaho! It's all just a short drive away! Little did you know that you would no longer be able to look out your kitchen window and see Bogus Basin because your beautiful huge maple trees (as well as the neighbors' trees) obstruct the view. This is a beautiful place to live!!...


(Continued…) …So dear 74-year-old me, what have you learned? I've learned that God has given me the gift of hindsight! I can look back over the years (and I often do) and see how His hand has been working in my life. I know without a doubt that God has a plan and a purpose for my life. I know that His purpose for bringing us to Boise was to draw me into a deeper relationship with Him, to grow in knowledge of His Word, to trust Him and to continue to grow in my faith. I also know when the next move comes, either earthly or heavenly, I'll not move alone, because His love always goes with me. Of that I am certain! It will be an adventure!Love, Elvia (Current Age: 74)

Dear 30-year-old me,I wish I could just give you a little hug and say: “Don’t worry so much about getting it absolutely right in everybody else’s eyes…the parenting thing I mean. Be confident in your own self, trust without a doubt in your own mother’s instincts, trust in your own self. You’re doing just fine!”Love, Me (Current Age: 43)

Dear 16-year-old me, Don't worry so much about what you

think others think. Be confident in what

you believe in and what you stand for.

Know that you are loved and that God

knew you before you were born. Know

that you will make mistakes and bad

choices, but that you will be forgiven if

you repent. Things that feel like are the

end of the world are not. Believe in

yourself!Love, Elessa (Current Age: 40)

Dear 17-year-old me, I know you think this is love. I know you feel sure you will be married and spend forever together with him. I know you really, really think you know what you are talking about, but remember "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" Jer. 17:9 NIV. Is he a Godly man? Does he serve and follow the Lord? If so, he will wait for the proper time. He will love you as Christ loved the church, enough to die for you. He will not rush you or push you into sin. Please choose the wisdom from above, not the wisdom of the world or the flesh….


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…The Lord's wisdom says "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life." Proverbs 31:10-12.

That means even now, be faithful to your future husband, whoever he made be. Stand firm and let God write your love story. You will not be disappointed. Love, Me (Current Age: 35)

Dear 18-year-old me,Be confident about what you can do, and be honest about what you can't. I am now trying to live by that!!Love, Dawn (Current Age: 34)

Dear 12-year-old me, When a boy you like tells you that he wants to get "dirty" with you, it does not necessarily mean that he wants to go ride motorcycles through the sagebrush and fields or play in the dirt, it means your body is changing and he wants you to explore. It is ok to say NO. God loves you inside and outside. Stay strong and learn to love yourself enough to say "no" this is not what you need. Love,Me (at age 55 - and still struggling with this)

Dear 22-year-old me,This is the day the Lord made, 38 years ago, when Steve and I wed. The journey together has had many paths. The love I had then has transformed into love and hope for many more tomorrows.

Had I known life's pain and sorrows would make me a better wife, mother and friend, I would not have struggled so much. Had I known the Lord held His hand out to me, I would have grasped it much sooner.

But this I know now...He will never leave me nor forsake me. His promises are true and His will be done, in me and through me for His name sake…


(Continued…)

…My heart has grown to understand the JOY of marriage, raising two beautiful daughters, embracing three precious grandchildren and a life well lived with a man that loves me, despite my failings. He loves me for who I am and what the Lord has accomplished in me. Through thick and thin, till death do us part has great rewards because we are held together by His love.

Hang in there girlfriend. After 38 years of marriage, I know the best is yet to come!

Love, Gina (Current Age: 60)

Dear 18-year-old me, A college degree is important, and yes, it will help you get a job. But lots of people have them. What truly pays off are the experiences you seek out, the places you go, the people you befriend and the things you like to do for fun - both during and after college. Be an interesting human being.Love, Liz (Current Age: 30)

Dear younger me, The future is all about choices and memories. Strive to make good ones. Love, Sheila (Current Age: 71)

Dear 18-year-old me, Don't give in to the temptation to pour yourself into your career...save your valuable energy for your family and home. The career doesn't give a flying fig about you, but your family does, and your home will give you fulfillment all your life.Love, Me (Current Age: 52)

Dear 43-year-old me, Okay, so you thought you knew everything when you were fifteen. And when you finally hit 43 at least you thought you had this mother thing figured out. But you were thrown a huge left turn—with your surprise pregnancy, 75 days in the hospital on bed rest and then of course the unexpected diagnosis of Down Syndrome 45 minutes after his birth. I look back on those lightless days, those long nights of whole-body sobbing into your pillow, that whirlpool of fears that threatened to swallow you whole. How I wish you could have glimpsed yourself today—nearly three short years into the future. All of that fear—for him, for you, for your family would have melted away with the tears…


(Continued…) …You are stronger than you think. You are hard wired to handle these unanticipated challenges. Just wait, you’ll see. This will be the biggest growing experience of your life. Embrace it. Enjoy it. A whole new world is about to be opened before you. Trust me; you hit the proverbial lottery with this little gift from heaven. You will love him more than you thought it possible to love a child. His tiny milestones will surpass any accolade or accomplishment in your life. He will harness your heart. So hold on tight, relish the ride and breathe in deeply the new vistas and views. Much love,Lonni (Current Age: 46)

Dear 20-year-old me,Beware-every stage of your life has it's challenges. Be accountable, responsible and respectful. Know that it is better to be alone than pretend you're someone else. Be you. Find you. Be happy with that. Know your power and relish your Joie De Vivre. Take comfort in your most precious possession-your family. Trust your internal compass!Love,Meghan (Current Age: 35)

Dear 18-year-old me,Be thoughtful and decisive about your major. Liberal Arts classes are terrific but if you are remotely interested in a health-related occupation in the future, take science courses now while you’re able to focus on school without responsibilities.Love,Kari (Current Age: 36)

Dear 21-year-old me,The person you are today is far from the one you will be in 10 years. Your goals, dreams, and hopes will be far more meaningful after experiencing this time in between. Look forward to a world you never dreamed existed.....it is a miraculous gift you will not want to miss out on.Love,Lanae (Current Age: 38)

Dear 61-year-old me, Life can change in an instant...be prepared by being firmly rooted in your faith.. God IS enough!Love, Margie (Current Age: 62)


You have your degree, you are

living at home because you aren’t

sure what to do next and you are

wishing time away so that your

younger boyfriend (future

husband) graduates so that you

can start your life together. Don’t

wish time away. Make the most

of the freedom you have at this

stage in your life. Go see the

world. Contact that agent about

playing hoops oversees and let

that be your vehicle and comfort

zone for experiencing new things,

meeting new people and learning

about yourself. Learn to be

independent.

Love,

Kari (Current Age: 36)

Dear 24-year-old me:Enjoy how "fat" you are now...

You'll wish you were at that

weight in the future! Forget

about your flaws. Love and

ENJOY yourself! Love, An older, wiser MJ

(Current Age: 46)

Dear 24-year-old me, Embrace your strengths. If you're good at something, help someone who struggles in that area. If you're NOT good at something, find someone who IS good and ask them to help you. Nobody is good at everything, so stop trying. Learn to be happy with your strengths and stop worrying about your weaknesses. Love, Susan (Current Age: 49)

Dear young 24-year-old me, Stop and enjoy your kids. Don't fret so much about the housework being done. Take the time to sit down and read a book with the kids, play with them, be silly. Getting upset or even angry doesn't help when the kids turn their ears off to you. Help them with clean up. Show them what you mean instead of spouting off words.

By the way, do NOT neglect your walk with the Lord. Let the kids see you reading and studying the Bible...and yes praying. Let them see you on your knees at your bedside. So much more is caught than taught. Yes, I know you are busy. But making and taking the time to be with the Lord will give you the strength to go on, day by day with the unending tasks of laundry, dishes, baths, and soothing scraped knees…


(Continued…)…When others ask you what you do for a living, tell them you are forming the lives of the next generations of Christian leaders. Don't shy back. Be proud. You are doing the most important job on this earth.

And Amy, make the time to date your man. I know you are tired, and don't have a lot of money, but this is important to your married life. When you go out, don't talk about the kids all the time. Remember why you fell in love. Rekindle that. Do some fun things together. If there was only one thing I could tell you, it would be to develop a spiritual walk with your husband. Pray together. Study the same passage and then discuss it. Also find another Christian couple that you can take the journey of life together with. Being accountable to each other only helps the bonds of friendship and your Christian faith to grow stronger.Love, Amy (Current Age: 56)

Dear 30-year-old me,Slow down enjoy those tiny people – they’ll soon be grown and leaving. Your heart will long to hold those tiny little hands and feel those tight hugs around your neck. Take all the pictures and video you can so in the later years you can remember it all.Love, Jen (Current Age: 43)

Dear 29-year-old me, I realize you're trying to be a perfect wife and mother, but let me share a few secrets with you. First of all, you and your husband are Italian and face it - Italians just yell! We yell when it's time for dinner and we yell when we're mad. And that's okay. Let it out...and no (Catholic) guilt about yelling...just call it what it is, the way we Italians communicate. The word perfect? There's no such thing as a perfect marriage and there aren't perfect children or perfect homes. Please don't strive for perfection; instead strive for good communication and laughter, shared interests and good listening. Give to your husband and don't expect the same (the more you give, the more he’ll surprise you)…


(continued…)

…And what you think of as a perfect child or perfect home is really what society has put in your mind....please don't fall for society's view. Know that God has a beautiful plan for bringing children into your life and He's equipped you with everything you need to raise those children. And please remember that your home is actually your family...not your actual house. Put your energy into the family God hand picked for you, not into creating the perfect house.

So love one another, pray together, keep laughing and yell if you want to...the years go by so fast. Don't waste a minute of it trying to be a perfect anything. You serve and are loved by a Perfect Lord and that's all the perfection you'll ever need. Love, Jennifer (Current Age: 42)

Dear 27-year-old me,I spent a lot of needless years trying to “work my way to Heaven” until a special friend shared God’s love with me. She told me that I could never do enough good works. God’s love was free and salvation was His gift through Grace; it was nothing I deserved but His free gift to me.Love, Lou (Current Age: 72)

Dear 29-year-old me, Don't worry so much about your daughter's schedule or routine. Embrace the rhythms of life and you'll enjoy the moments in it more. Buckle up! Lots of fun to be had ahead.Love,

Kirsten (Current Age: 41)

Dear 30-year-old me, Relationships are always THE most important thing in life - not honors and professional accomplishments. The world tells us otherwise and makes us doubt our commitment to the Lord, our family and others. In particular, as a young mother, the time you spend being with and teaching your children is worth all of the gold in the world. So don't doubt the value of your commitment.Love,Mary Kay (Current Age: 67)


Your first son is now born and you are scared, but you will raise him to be a fine man. So, don't stress about everything you do or don't do. Life will show you that what you did was right and now it is his turn to raise his two children, with all your help and wisdom.

Love,

Laurel (Current Age: 61)


Listen to your parents, they want the best for you, follow their teaching, you will turn out well. Be blessed,Ugochi (Current Age: 35)

Dear 24-year-old me, Stop spending so much time looking for answers in parenting books and magazines. Instead, be more introspective and put some real thought into your child, whatever the situation may be. Then, listen to your instincts and be confident with your parenting ability. Love, Heidi (Current Age: 41)

Dear 31-year-old me,"Don't blink....before you know it your 3 precious girls will be grown-up". How many times I heard these words, but in the midst of changing diapers, bandaging knees, satisfying "I'm hungry," and barely able to keep up on all the other young-mother responsibilities, I couldn't even begin to grasp the reality of how true they would become. Now, many days and years later, I feel those words with almost every heartbeat within my chest. In just a few weeks our oldest daughter will be graduating from high school - "don't blink" now resonates deeply. My easily flowing tears aren't those of sorrow, fear, or regret - but truly more of "I blinked...and now my daughter is 18." But the Lord has been so incredibly gracious to our family. Through our ill and best attempts at parenting, He has lovingly cared for our family and the raising of our daughters…


(Continued…)…Oh, and our 3 precious girls are now 4 - Sarah, 15, who has been part of our family since age 11, will be adopted very soon....forever weaved into the fabric of our lives. Looking back, I wish I would have left the laundry and dishes to sit down and color one more Disney Princess, play hide-and-seek, or simply snuggle a bit longer. But looking into the eyes and hearts of my children now, I know that they know how crazy their momma (and daddy) are about them! All of the "I should have's" that could linger in my mind I need not give room to grow, and be determined to live this day forward as the best mom for my kids today....each individual, unique and a priceless gift from the Lord! Love, Shauna (Current Age: 43)

Dear 30-year-old me,So you thought you knew

what love was when you married that amazing man? Buckle your seatbelt sister! When you hold that fragile little baby for the first time you will discover new heart strings you never knew existed.

Motherhood will be the hardest – and most rewarding thing you’ve ever done. It will open your eyes to an entirely new perspective. It will draw you closer to God – if you allow it.

Now more than ever, lean on God. Seek His wisdom. Be aware that God is present and available to you every moment of each day. This parenting thing will be a roller-coaster, but you’re in good hands when you’re trusting God.

Love,Jeannette (Current Age: 39)


I found this beautiful quote to keep

things in perspective.

"100 years from now it won't

matter what kind of car you drove,

the house you lived in, or how much

money you had, but the world may be

a different place because you

were important in the life of a child.“

- AnonymousLiving with less means there

is more to give...more love, more

security, more stability. That's what

makes a truly happy child.

Love, Kim (Current Age: 44)


Make sure everyone in your family and your

closest friends know that "no man/woman is

an island." Every decision that you make and

your family makes will affect one another. Take

care of your health. If you don't make good

health decisions someone could have the

burden of taking care of you. Make sure those

around you know, likewise, their health

decisions will affect your life. When it comes

to your health be sure to eliminate risky

decisions and risky behavior because so many

people love you.

Love, Me (Current Age: 73)

Dear 40-year-old me, You have a wonderful husband and two teenage sons who keep you hopping plus a full time teaching position. Don't sweat the neat house and your "TO DO" list so much; stop and enjoy your family. Thank the Lord more often for what you do have going for you!! Much love, Alice (Current Age: 68)

Hi there 65-year-old me,No one tells you how to grow older, that is up to you! My little angel on my shoulder tells me all the time "Life wasn't meant to be easy all the time, but live life one day at a time and to the fullest."Love, Susan (Current Age: 65)

dear younger me...a mother's day post

Spiritual