1. Chapter: 8

2. Objectives Recognize many ways you communicate with others Evaluate the importance of good listening skills Judge the importance of communicating a positive image of yourself Identify five levels of communication Describe assertive behavior and its effect on communication Analyze communication skills that work well with parents Describe group behaviors that involve violence Recognize sexual harassment if it occurs 3. Levelsa of Communication 1. Make small circle with the groups I have organized. 2. Everyone must participate. 3. No talking with other groups. 4. Everyone must listen with their eyes. 5. When I call time you must stop where you are. 6. If you have not finished the previous round, finish it and then move on. 4. Round #1 Share an event you have experienced. Example: 5. Round #2 Describe asituation that has proven to be a good INFLUENCE on your life. Example: 6. Round #3 Describe a qualityyou already have that will make you a better parent or spouse. Example: 7. Round #4 You must give acompliment to one other person in your group. Example 8. Levels of Communication EventSuperficial InfluencePersonal Personal QualityValidating Compliment 9. Levels of Communication SPV Superficial Communication making up the majority of our communication. Talking about the Personal weather, home, school, food, et Communication involving c. opening up and talking about feelings, beliefs and opinions that mean something to you.Validating Communication reinforcing peoples feelings about themselves. 10. Levels of Communication Questions 1. 2. 3.4.5. 6.Can a relationship remain stable for an extended period of time if they communicate in a superficial state? Why? Which levels of communication must a relationship strive for in order to grow? Why? Which was more difficult to share in group? Events, Influences, Personal qualities, Compliments. Why? What are some reactions that occurred in your group? Explain why these occurred. Why is it more difficult to share personal qualities and compliments. Why would you communicate superficially? 11. Reasons for keeping Communication Superficial: I may be hurt. I dont want to hurt their feelings. They will misinterpret what I say. They wont be receptive It will put our relationship at risk. I will be out on a limb and wont be supported. http://www.mnadr.state.mn.us/workplace/pdf/Keepcomm.pdf 12. What Validation Is To validate someone's feelings is first to acceptsomeone's feelings. Next, it is to understand them, and finally it is to nurture them. 13. Basic Steps to Validation Acknowledging the other person's feelings Identifying the feelings Offering to listen Helping them label the feelings Being there for them; remaining present physically and emotionally Feeling patient Feeling accepting and non-judgmental 14. Example of Validating I hear you.That hurts That's not good Wow, that's a lot to deal with I would feel the same way. (I would be sad/hurt/angry/jealous, etc. too) That is sad. That sounds discouraging. That sounds like it would really hurt That must really hurt. I know just what you mean. I would feel the same way. I can understand how you feel. It sounds like you are really feeling ____. It sounds like is really important to you. 15. Terms to Know Communication any means bywhich you share a message with another person Verbal Communication use words to send or receive a message Body Language A form of nonverbal communication 16. Conflict 1. to come into collision or disagreement; be contradictory, at variance, or in opposition; clash: 2. to fight or contend; do battle. 3. a fight, battle, or struggle, esp. a prolonged struggle; strife. 4. controversy; quarrel: conflicts between parties. 5. discord of action, feeling, or effect; antagonism or opposition, as of interests or principles: a conflict of ideas. 6. a striking together; collision. 17. Terms to Know Cont. Non-verbal Communication use factors other than words ex. Gestures, facial expressions, eye contact, and body movements Active Listening Type of listening in which a person indicates to the sender that a message has been heard and encourages further communication 18. Terms to Know Cont. Feedback Communicating to the other person howyou feel about what was said Passive listening Taking in the words and offers no sign of hearing or understanding Empathy Process of seeing things from another persons view 19. Terms to Know Cont. Assertive To express yourfeelings directly Cliques - A narrow, exclusive group of people held together by common interests Mediator Third party that helps resolve conflicts 20. Terms to Know Cont. Hazing A social groupsintentional infliction of physical and emotional abuse Bullying Refers to infliction of physical, verbal, or emotional abuse 21. Terms to Know Cont. Conflict Resolution A form of meditation that solvesdisagreements in a positive way. Sexual Harassment Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors for other verbal or physical conduct of sexual nature. 22. Levels of Communication Level Five Little conversation weakest level Often referred to as clich Level Four Draw out very little from other or yourself Not interested in conversation 23. Levels of Communication Level Three Engage in conversation Willingness in this level is to share your ideas and judgments with others Carefully restrict ideas until you know what others reactions will be. 24. Levels of Communication Level Two Become increasingly open to others and expose feelings and emotions Strong desire to tell how you feel in being completely honest Do not judge others around you 25. Levels of Communication Level One Completely open and honest with others Have courage to reveal deepest thoughts and feelings to others Want to know and understand what another person is feeling and why 26. Motivator Hammer Communication or Calvin and Hobbes or Often we really communicate destructively and constructively with people we are surrounded with. Whole days can be ruined because of destructive communication. Put down take 14 positive remarks to erase. 27. Hammer of Communication THE CLAW IS LIKE DESTRUCTIVE COMMUNICATION.THE SHANK IS LIKE NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION:It is sharp and dangerous and is used to destroy and tear down relationships.It is strong and can be used to support construction or destruction.THE HANDLE OF THE HAMMER IS LIKE US IT IS THE DRIVING FORCE. We are in control of our communication and choose to use it in a constructive or destructive manner.THE HEAD IS LIKE CONSTRUCTIVE COMMUNICATION.It is smooth and rounded and is used to build and help put things together. 28. What is an I-Message? Not accusing are notbelittling Use these to take responsibility for how you feel These messages are less threatening and help keep lines of communication open 29. What is a You-Message? Often used but morenegative than an Imessage Creates confrontation when you do not mean to Accusing and belittling 30. What is a We-Statement? Offers a further step inimproving communication particularly in families These indicate the problem existing in a group or relationship Minimize individualistic aspects of a problem and emphasize togetherness 31. Results of Win-Win Solutions More creative in Thinking up solutions Take more responsibility for helping everyone have needs met Feeling of mutual respect Love grows deeper with every conflict resolved. 32. Cliques Often put pressure on teens to pretend they aresomething they are not Provide support and security Give teens an identity 33. Hazing Involves humiliation orphysical distress Teens with high selfesteem see hazing for what it is, hostile people feel they have power over others 34. Bullying Form of violence including theft, staling money, harshpranks, and imposed territorial bases Target people who seem weaker or smaller than their self 35. Gangs Network of people that areinvolved in criminal activity and violence Gangs are formed for a sense of belonging and protection 36. A Little Respect Goes A Long Way