bs srudy material

8/3/2019 BS Srudy Material

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Self- and Observer-Rating at Entry and Exit level of each semester

On a scale of 1-10 (1 being the lowest and 10 the highest) please rate yourself/the student on:

Sem-3 (IPC) Ratings (Entry Level) Ratings (Exit Level)

1. Communication Skills

2. Interpersonal Skills3. Conflict Management

4. Negotiation Skills

Topics Covered (In Detail)

Module I: Interpersonal Communication : An Introduction Importance of Interpersonal Communication,

Types Self and Other Oriented,

Rapport Building NLP,

Communication Mode,

Steps to improve Interpersonal Communication

Activity 1: Chinese whisper

Activity 2: Communicate without Looking

Learning Outcomes-

understanding the importance of interpersonal communication in

personal and professional life and

understanding the barriers to communication

Module II: Behavioral Communication

Meaning and Nature of behavioral communication,

Persuasion, Influence, Listening and Questioning,

Guidelines for developing Human Communication skills,

Relevance of Behavioral Communication for personal and


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professional development

Activity1: Effective nonverbal communication activity

Activity 2: Probing activity

Activity 3: Discussing the importance of Behavioral communication in

ones life.

Learning Outcomes Understanding the differences in the non verbal behaviour of

individuals.

Understanding the importance of persuasion, influence, listening

and questioning in communication.

Understanding the importance of probing in personal and

professional situations.

Module III: Interpersonal Styles

Transactional Analysis,

Life Position/Script Analysis, Games Analysis,

Interactional and Transactional Styles

Activity 1: Discussion on the concept of Transactional Analysis (TA) -

Activity2: Case study on Transactional Analysis (TA) -

Activity 3: Psychometric test on TA -

Learning Outcomes-

understanding the concept of Transactional Analysis Understanding how we differently we communicate indifferent

situations

Module IV: Conflict Management

Meaning and nature of conflicts,

Styles and techniques of conflict management,

Conflict management and interpersonal communication

Activity1: Discussion on conflict and its management.

Activity2: Psychometric test on conflict management style.Activity 3: Case study on Conflict management and decision making.

Learning:

Better understanding about conflict

Learning of Conflict management skills

Module V: Negotiation Skills

Meaning and Negotiation approaches (Traditional and

Contemporary),


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Process and strategies of negotiations,

Negotiation and interpersonal communication

Activity 1: A Role Play on real life situations.

Activity2: Imparting students the strategies to indulge in win-win

negotiation ( Details discussed in the end)

Activity 3: Discussion on how to give feedback after negotiation

Learning:

understanding the art of negotiation

understanding how interpersonal communication is important

for negotiation

understanding the strategies of negotiations.

Details of the Activities

Module 1

Activity 1: Chinese whisper

Aim: It shows how easily information can become corrupted by indirect

communication. It can also be used to teach students to moderate the volume of their

voice, and how to listen attentively.

Instructions:Mary had a terrier dog like sentences where passed on in groups of 7-8 people to see

where alteration in the original message has occurred and discuss the causes for the

same

Activity 2: Communicate without Looking

Aim: Body language and eye contact are the two important aspects of effective

communication. This activity has eliminated these two aspects. The main aim behind

this activity is to explain the importance of eye contact and body language for effective

communication.

Instructions: Two participants for this activity have to sit back-to back and converse on a given

topic.

After the conversation ends, a feedback from the audience will be collected to see

how this conversation, devoid of any eye contact, was different from a normal

conversation.

Module 2


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Activity 1: Effective nonverbal communication activity-

Aim:The purpose of this activity is to define what you and others in the class considereffective nonverbal behavior in some social situations.

Instructions: For each of the social situations below, list the nonverbal behaviors you believe

will achieve the stated goal.

Compare the responses of the group members.

Reflect on the behavior of yourself and others and consider how you might

change some of your nonverbal cues to communicate more effectively. Prepare a

response to share with the class.

Example: Initiate a conversation with a stranger at a party

Nonverbal cues:

1. make eye contact,

2. offer hand in greeting,

3. smile,

4. come within four feet of the other person,5. turn body towards the other person,

6. nod occasionally when the other is talking.

1) Take control or exercise leadership in a class group.

2) Come across well in a job interview.

3) Tell an interesting joke or story.

4) Appear friendly and warm without coming on too strong.

5) Signal your desire to leave a conversation when the other person keeps on talking.

Activity 2: Probing Activity-

Aim:Probing questions can also help someone to express their feelings and sensations.Sometimes it is a customer who is saying something vague and woolly, maybe because

they have a limited grasp of technical issues which are our day-to-day work. On other

occasions we are trying to draw information out of a colleague. They have an idea or a

concern that we do not clearly understand, and we need to help them express it in detail.

Interviewers and negotiators use probing questions to draw out the information they

need. Probing questions can also be used when someone is reluctant to talk a staff

member who performance is affected by a personal problem, perhaps; or a witness to adisciplinary matter. A good listener, skilled in the use of probing questions, is able to

draw out more information so that it is comprehensive, specific and clear.

Instructions:

This training activity starts with an introduction to the idea of probing questions a

Participants work in pairs, asking probing questions about a smell.

Then they complete a similar task, but this time asking questions about a colored

photograph that their partner is looking at.

Finally, there is a group interview exercise based on drawing out details about

holidays.


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Module 3

Activity 1: Concept of Transactional Analysis

Transactional analysis - modern usage - introduction

Transactional Analysis is a theory developed by Dr. Eric Berne in the 1950s.

Transactional Analysis is a social psychology and a method to improve communication.The theory outlines, how we have developed and treat ourselves, how we relate and

communicate with others, and offers suggestions and interventions which will enable us

to change and grow. Transactional Analysis is underpinned by the philosophy that:

people can change

we all have a right to be in the world and be accepted

Transactional analysis - ego states

Berne devised the concept of ego states to help explain how we are made up, and how

we relate to others. These are drawn as three stacked circles and they are one of thebuilding blocks of Transactional Analysis. They categorize the ways we think, feel and

behave and are called Parent, Adult, and Child. Each ego state is given a capital letter to

denote the difference between actual parents, adults and children.

Parent ego state

This is a set of feelings, thinking and behavior that we have copied from our parents and

significant others.

For example, we may notice that we are saying things just as our father, mother,

grandmother may have done, even though, consciously, we don't want to. We do this as

we have lived with this person so long that we automatically reproduce certain things

that were said to us, or treat others as we might have been treated.


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Adult ego state

The Adult ego state is about direct responses to the here and now. We deal with things

that are going on today in ways that are not unhealthily influenced by our past.

The Adult ego state is about being spontaneous and aware with the capacity for

intimacy. When in our Adult we are able to see people as they are, rather than what we

project onto them. We ask for information rather than stay scared and rather than make

assumptions. Taking the best from the past and using it appropriately in the present is

an integration of the positive aspects of both our Parent and Child ego states. So this

can be called the Integrating Adult.Child ego state

The Child ego state is a set of behaviors, thoughts and feelings which are replayed from

our own childhood.

Transactional analysis - strokes

In Transactional Analysis we call compliments and general ways of giving recognition

strokes. We all have particular strokes we will accept and those we will reject. For

example, if we have always been told we are clever, and our brother is creative, then we

are likely to accept strokes for being clever, but not for being creative. From this frameof reference only one person in the family can be the creative one and so on.

Stroking can be physical, verbal or nonverbal. It is likely that the great variety of stroke

needs and styles present in the world results from differences in wealth, cultural mores,

and methods of parenting.

The stroke economy

Claude Steiner suggests that, as children, we are all indoctrinated by our parents with

five restrictive rules about stroking.

don't give strokes when we have them to give

don't ask for strokes when we need them don't accept strokes if we want them

don't reject strokes when we don't want them

don't give ourselves strokes

Strokes can be positive or negative:

A) "I like you"

B) "I don't like you"

Strokes can be unconditional or conditional. An unconditional stroke is a stroke for

being whereas a conditional stroke is a stroke for doing. For instance:

"I like you" - unconditional"I like you when you smile" - conditional

As negative strokes these might be:

"I don't like you" - negative unconditional

"I don't like you when you're sarcastic" - negative conditional

People often have a stroke filter. They only let in strokes which they think they are

allowed to let in. For instance they allow themselves to receive strokes for being clever

and keep out strokes for being good looking. One way to think about this to consider

being out in the rain. The rain is the strokes that are available to us, both positive and

negative. There is a hole in the umbrella and some of the strokes go through and we


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save them in a bucket to enjoy in lean times. Conversely we might use them negatively

to reinforce the negative strokes we give to ourselves. Of course, some just bounce off

the umbrella and we might not accept the good strokes that are coming our way. Some

might come in but fall straight onto the floor.

Transactional analysis - life positions

Life positions are basic beliefs about self and others, which are used to justify decisions

and behavior.

When we are conceived we are hopefully at peace, waiting to emerge into the worldonce we have grown sufficiently to be able to survive in the outside of the womb. If

nothing untoward happens we will emerge contented and relaxed. In this case we are

likely to perceive the world from the perspective of I am OK and You are OK.

However, perhaps our mother had some traumatic experiences, or the birth was difficult

or even life threatening. This experience is likely to have an effect on the way we

experience the world, even at the somatic level. In which case we might emerge sensing

that life is scary and might, for example, go into "I am not OK and You are not OK

either".

Let's take it that the pregnancy went fine, and the birth was easy enough. What then?Well life experiences might reinforce our initial somatic level life position, or contradict

it. If we were treated punitively, talked down to, and not held, we may begin to believe

"I am not OK and You are OK". This might be the only sense we can make of our

experiences.

Let's take another situation. Perhaps we were picked on and bullied as a child. We

learnt that the way to get by was to bully others and that way we felt stronger and in

control. Our behaviour then comes into the I am OK and You are not OK quadrant. Of

course this may cover up our belief that we are really not OK, but nobody sees that.

They just see our behaviour, and in fact we may have forgotten all about our negative

feelings about ourselves as we have tried so hard to deny the pain of believing we arenot OK.

There are a number of ways of diagramming the life positions. Franklin Ernst drew the

life positions in quadrants, which he called the OK Corral (1971). We have put these

into red and green to show the effective and ineffective quadrants for communication

and healthy relationships. By shading in the quadrants according to the amount of time

we think we spend in each we can get an idea of the amount of time we spend in each.

Ernst used the term 'Corralogram' for this method of self-assessment using the OK

Corral matrix.


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Blame model

The Transactional Analysis 'Okay Corral' can be linked to 'blame', for which Jim Davis

TSTA developed this simple and helpful model. Commonly when emotions are

triggered people adopt one of three attitudes relating to blame, which each correlate to a

position on the Okay Corral:

I'm to blame (You are okay and I'm not okay - 'helpless')

You are to blame (I'm okay and you are not okay - 'angry')

We are both to blame (I'm not okay and you are not okay - 'hopeless')

None of these is a healthy position.

Instead the healthy position is, and the mindset should be: "It's no-one's fault, blameisn't the issue - what matters is how we go forward and sort things out." (I'm okay and

you are okay - 'happy')

(With acknowledgements to Jim Davis TSTA)

Transactional analysis - the script

The script is a life plan, made when we are growing up. It is like having the script of a

play in front of us - we read the lines and decide what will happen in each act and how

the play will end. The script is developed from our early decisions based upon our life

experience. We may not realize that we have set ourselves a plan but we can often find

this out if we ask ourselves what our favorite childhood story was, who was our favorite

character in the story and who do we identify with. Then consider the beginning, middle

and end of the story. How is this story reflected in our life today?

Another way of getting to what script is may be to think about what we believe will

happen when we are in old age. Do we believe we will be alive at 80 or 90 years old, be

healthy, happy, and contented? What do we think will be on the headstone for our

grave? What would we like to be on it?

Transactional analysis - time structuring


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The way in which we structure time is likely to reflect the different hungers. We all

structure time in a variety of ways:

Withdrawal

Rituals

Activities

Games

Intimacy

Obtaining balance means ensuring that we have sufficient time for play and intimacy

and if this does not occur then it would be beneficial to explore what we might beavoiding.

Transactional analysis - games

I am sure that every one of us must have been in the situation where we have said,

"Why does this always keep happening to me" or "I always keep meeting people who

hurt me and then go off and leave me". Sometimes it may be that we like to help people

and then it goes wrong as the person we were trying to help says that we didn't do it

well enough and that we got it wrong. We might think "Well, I was only trying to help"

and feel got at.When similar situations keep happening over and over again then the term

Transactional Analysis uses for this is a game. A game is a familiar pattern of behavior

with a predictable outcome. Games are played outside Adult awareness and they are our

best attempt to get our needs met - although of course we don't.

Games are learned patterns of behavior, and most people play a small number of

favorite games with a range of different people and in varying intensities.

First Degree games are played in social circles generally lead to mild upsets not major

traumas.

Second Degree games occur when the stakes may be higher. This usually occurs in

more intimate circles, and ends up with an even greater negative payoff.Third Degree games involve tissue damage and may end up in the jail, hospital or

morgue.

Chris Davidson (2002) has argued that world politics can involve fourth degree games -

where the outcomes involve whole communities, countries or even the world.

Games vary in the length of time that passes while they are being played. Some can take

seconds or minutes while others take weeks months or even years. People play games

for these reasons:

to structure time

to acquire strokes to maintain the substitute feeling and the system of thinking, beliefs and actions

that go with it

to confirm parental injunctions and further the life script

to maintain the person's life position by "proving" that self/others are not OK

to provide a high level of stroke exchange while blocking intimacy and

maintaining distance

to make people predictable.

Activity 2: Case Study on Transactional Analysis


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Seema, Shanu and Rita are working together in an organization. Seema and Shanu

were good friends. All three of them had a very healthy competition between them

as they all were at the same level. Seema was very hard working, ambitious and

responsible employee. Because of her hard work and good efforts, Seemas division

had become the leader in the company and the upper management had praised her

lavishly. She believed that with a good recommendation from Shanu, she would get

a promotion. But unfortunately Rita received the promotion and moved to Topeka.

Seema was shocked. It was bad that she did not get the promotion, but she could notstand the fact that Rita had been chosen over her. She and Shanu had been calling

Rita Ms. Intolerable, because neither of them could stand her pompous arrogance.

She felt that Rita being chosen was an insult to her. When the grapevine confirmed

her suspicion that Shanu had strongly influenced the decision, she determined to

reduce her interaction with Shanu to a bare minimum. Their relationship in the office

was very chilly for almost a month. Shanu soon gave up trying to get in touch with

Seema and they began communication became official. Finally William, their

immediate boss, called the two for a meeting. William said, were going to sit here

until you two become friends again. Seema resisted for a few minutes, denying thatnothing had changed in their relationship, but when she saw that Wiiliam was

serious, she finally said, Shanu seems more interested in dealing with Rita. Shanu

could not say anything. William came to the rescue. William said that,Seema if

youre upset about that promotion, you'd know that Shanu had nothing to do with it

but praised you and kept pointing out how this division would suffer if we buried

you in Topeka. With your bonuses you are making as much as Rita and if your work

continues to be outstanding, youll be headed for much better place than Topeka.

Embarrassed, Seema looked up at Shanu and apologized for treating her unfairly.

The next day office was almost back to normal.

Stages/

periods

Ego

States

Strokes Games Interpersonal

Communication

Before

Promotion

Adult EgoExpecting

promotion.

Friendly, giving

time to each

other, trust &

enjoy free time

together.

informal &

formal, face-to-

face

communication.

Promotiontakes place

ParentEgo

Did not getthe

promotion.

Chillyenvironment in

office, not

listening to

Sharp.

Nointerpersonal

communication.

Cold war

period

Child EgoFelt that was

betrayed by

Sharp.

Cold war,

avoidance &

escape from

confrontations.

Only work

related short

communication.


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Meeting

and

thereafter

Adult EgoCame to know

the truth,

realized her

mistake &

apologized.

New relation

have been

established,

more healthy &

strong.

Healthy

Communication

re-established.

Conclusion:

Now with the help of Psychoanalytical theory i.e. Transactional Analysis, Seema

can understand her difference in behavior in different situations and can improve

those behaviors which are not fruitful in those situation.

She can also use Interpersonal communication as to understand the person, real

situation/conflicts better.

She can apply both to understand others behavior so that she can negotiate with

them easily and effectively.

Activity 3: Psychometric test on Transactional Analysis

Module 4

Activity 2: Psychometric test on Conflict Management

Instructions: The proverbs listed below can be thought of as some of the different

strategies for resolving conflict. Read each of the proverbs and using the following

scale score how typical each is of your actions when in conflict.

1 - never do this, 2 - seldom do this, 3 - sometimes do this, 4 - frequently do this,

5 - usually do this

SCORE1. It is easier to refrain than to retreat from a quarrel 1.

2. If you cannot make a person think as you do, make him or her do as you think 2.

3. Soft words win hard hearts 3.

4. You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours 4.

5. Come now and let us reason together 5.

6. When two quarrel, the person who keeps silent first is the most praiseworthy 6.

7. Might overcomes right 7.

8. Smooth words make smooth ways 8.

9. Better half a loaf than no bread at all 9.

10. Truth lies in knowledge, not in majority opinion 10.

11. He who fights and runs away lives to fight another day 11.

12. He hath conquered well that hath made his enemies flee 12.

13. Kill your enemies with kindness 13.

14. A fair exchange brings no quarrel 14.

15. No person has the final answer but every person has a piece to contribute 15.

16. Stay away from people who disagree with you 16.

17. Fields are won by those who believe in winning 17.

18. Kind words are worth much and cost little 18.

19. Tit for tat is fair play 19.

20. Only the person who is willing to give up their monopoly on truth can profit

from the truths that others hold

20.


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21. Avoid quarrelsome people as they will only make your life miserable 21.

22. A person who will not flee will make others flee 22.

23. Soft words ensure harmony 23.

24. One gift for another makes good friends 24.

25. Bring your conflicts into the open and face them directly; only then will the best

solution be discovered

25.

26. The best way of handling conflicts is to avoid them 26.

27. Put your foot down where you mean to stand 27.

28. Gentleness will triumph over anger 28.

29. Getting part of what you want is better than not getting anything at all 29.30. Frankness, honesty and trust will move mountains 30.

31. There is nothing so important you have to fight for it 31.

32. There are two kinds of people in the world, the winners and the losers 32.

33. When one hits you with a stone, hit him or her with a piece of cotton 33.

34. When both give in halfway, a fair settlement is achieved 34.

35. By digging and digging, the truth is discovered 35.

SCORINGCopy your scorings from the questionnaire into the table below. Total the columns. The

higher the total score for each strategy, the more frequently you tend to use thatapproach.

WITHDRAWING FORCING SMOOTHING COMPROMISING CONFRONTING

1 2 3 4 5

6 7 8 9 10

11 12 13 14 15

16 17 18 19 20

21 22 23 24 25

26 27 28 29 30

31 32 33 34 35

TOTAL TOTAL TOTAL TOTAL TOTAL


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Activity 3: Case study on Conflict management and decision making

Food for the Children, an international NGO based in the UK, provides food grains and

powdered milk to families where children are at risk of malnourishment or starvation. It

has provided food to families in the small South Pacific Island nation of Papua Tuyua

for the past eight years, utilizing the school system as the means of identifying needy

children and distributing the food. The Minister of Education in Papua Tuyua has

approved the involvement of the school system in this project, though each year the

process of approval has become more cumbersome and drawn out. Sarah Britton has

arrived from London for a one week visit as the representative from Food for the

Children sent to negotiate the arrangement, and she quickly comes to the opinion that

the Education Minister is delaying the process in hopes for a bribe. The local school

officials are eager for the food supplies and assure Sarah that they can distribute the

food on their own with or without the Ministers approval. Sarah sends an email to the

executive committee in London requesting instructions on what she should do. Thefood has to be supplied within the next several days before the monsoons come.

ROLE PLAY: You are members of the executive committee. What should Sarah do?

Module 5

Activity 1: Role Play

A real life situation can be given to a group of students for role play.

For example a conflicting situation between School canteen management and

students about the quality of the food provided.

Ask the students to divide themselves in two teams one representing the students

and other representing the canteen management.

Then direct them to come up with ideas that are helpful in win-win negotiation.

Activity 2: Win- Win negotiation

Notes attached

Activity 3: Discussion on how to give feedback after negotiation

Aim: Having a colleague offer advice can be invaluable. If you're negotiating on your

own, some aspects of feedback are not possible. We strongly urge you to have the

discipline to review your own negotiations as a matter of good habit. It's no mistake that

star athletes regularly review their own performance and set themselves goals. When

successful enough, star athletes enjoy a coaches sage feedback. So who do you think

would be your best negotiation coaches?


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1. Give the feedback immediately after the negotiation has finished

2. People are not their behaviors! Describe what you have seen rather than labeling

people as their behavior.

3. Get the negotiator to initially focus on what they have done well during the

negotiation. Under no circumstances allow them to start to discuss the

improvement areas or mistakes that they have made

4. Be specific - use specific examples of both dialogue and behavior to explain your

points5. Resist passing on your own style or prejudices explain what the current best

practice thinking is - don't tell them how you would have handled the situation.

6. When you give the negotiator feedback on improvement areas, make sure this is

phrased positively not you didn't do this very well but more like, you could

improve this by. Constructive not destructive, is the golden rule when

giving feedback.

7. There are three areas that need to be reviewed after most negotiations - the first is

the behaviors during the negotiation, the second is the outcome of the

negotiation, the third is the processes, tool sets, strategies and tactics employed.

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