"Brahmin guys are not love/marriage material", Says Brahmin girl

November 16, 2007 by udayms

Recently Dilip had posted a very interesting post @ Chennai Metblogs on the subject of castes and religion. It evoked a wide variety of responses from readers. One particular was interesting

….. Am posting it here with my comments inline in blue

i am a brahmin girl. you brahmin guys might not realise it, but brahmin guys are not love/marriage material. i dont blame just you guys – the current social setup is also a reason.

most of my friends (brahmin girls) DONT want to marry a brahmin boy. even i am like that. the reasons? read below:

Here starts the fun part!!!

1) in the current, very competitive setup, brahmin guys – from childhood – have been programmed to take advantage of ANYTHING and everything that comes their way – to the point they will not be even be good friends. this might earn you a good job and a arranged marriage bride in later years. but dont expect a girl to like you after they know about you (and brahmin girls are no exception).

I really thought that was supposed to be good thing. Dear friend, This is a dog eat dog world. If you are not an opportunist, you will be a loser. Whether such people will have friends is a different equation. That would really depend on how friendly they are, how much they care about others. One can be an opportunist and still be ethical.

2) by the time a brahmin guys is settled in his life he is almost 30 or after 30. almost all have bald heads when they get married. most young brahmin girls find other attractive guys by this time.

That was a trend 10 years ago. And that was because any person in those days would take that many years to settle down in life. This may not sound right to you at your age. But, being settled in life is very important for a guy to lead a happy life with a girl. Otherwise, their beginning years of marriage would be spent in worries and trying to tackle everyday’s problems instead of being together and affectionate. Today, almost all brahmin guys I know get married pretty early. Today, almost any guy out with a decent college background is able to earn a decent salary. He can apply for loans and all that. Financially, today a guy can plan his marriage much before than guys 10 years ago. So, this is only a question of changing times. Not related to Brahmins!!!

3) the western influence (thank god!) is making parents realise that love is important for their girl children also. so many parents today are open to a good educated son-in-law from other castes.

You are basically wrong and prejudiced that all brahmin guys don’t know the first thing about love . You may have come across a few in your life time. But, do not generalize based on those few select cases. One question – If your dad a brahmin? If he is… does your theory apply to him as well?

4) in my college, and in my class, you can see that the brahmin guys are the puniest, cunning fellows – i am sorry to say this. but thats the reality. you can say whatever – but a girl wants a man who can protect her financially and PHYSICALLY. physical charms like well built body, broad chest and strong shoulders give us that impression. while i can point out many good looking, normal guys who are funny, willing to share from other castes, i dont see ONE brahmin boy in my college like that. there is only one love story that involves a brahmin guy – he is super rich, btw.

This again is just baseless. lets try think of good looking, tall handsome brahmin celebrities – Madhavan, Kamal hassan, Arvind Swamy, Jayaram, Rajiv Gandhi… I believe of them were brahmins and good looking too. That apart. Some day, I hope that you do wake up to reality. Looks are temporary. No matter how good looking you are and or how good looking a guy is. At old age, when you have only the guy left for you.. It wont really matter if he is bald. What will matter then is not how he looked during college days. But, how caring and affectionate he is on those lonely years with you. And believe me. Real life is not like movies where you need muscle men to protect you everyday. You should be looking for a soulmate not a bodyguard or a joker. You need a person who will provide you with love and other basic necessities. You need a person who would serve your physical, emotional and materialistic needs not a person with a six pack abs without enough earnings to provide you with what you need. You need a person who can protect you by providing you with a decent place to live in, by providing you healthy foods, by loving you.

5) many brahmin guys are hypocrites. while most cringe at the thought of eating meat, they relish alcohol – and some even blog about wines! while y some act non-meat eating at homes, they eat meat with their friends. most talk about the glory of their caste, but fail to read even the basic texts that would give them some understanding about what they are talking!most other caste boys (not FCs), dont have these faults (they do other common faults – common to all men – but brahmins have the above in addition to what can be considered normal deviations).

I have often come across this statement. I am a brahmin. I eat eggs. I drink wine at parties. I am NOT a alcoholic or a hard core non-veggie. I don’t call myself a vegetarian. All these are just a matter of pure choice. Being brought up the way I was, I grew up hating meat. I can’t stand the smell of fish. Nobody is forcing me not to eat non-veg stuff. It’s my choice and my preference. You are talking about college guys who are forced to stick to the rules of the house. Check out independent brahmin adults. They wouldn’t even pretend that they don’t drink or take meat if they do it.

i come from a family where my decisions will be respected. and i am sure that i will NOT marry a brahmin boy – my parents know this and they respect my desicion. any brahmin girls reading this message and shaking their head, try spending some time with boys from other castes – not FCs – but from bc/mbc/sc/sts . you will find them so much better than the cynical, cunning brahmin boys.

I guess your problem is that you are still in college and still in the fairy tale world of a knight coming galloping on his horse to sweep you of your feet and ride away to a castle far far away. It’s nice. It’s romantic. It’s time to wake up!!!

i wrote my mind (and this is the frame of mind of many of my relatives and my friends in college). i really feel sorry for brahmin guys who are being trained this way from beginning. but i think they should change atleast after they graduate from college.

Posted by: brahminponnu at November 14, 2007 08:39 PM

Just my personal thoughts!!!!

Ramanathan

It is wrong to castigate Brahmin boys. All the qualities you have listed are there in all castes. Being a Brahmin I would like also point out that we would like not to marry Brahmin girls. The reasons:

1) However they may look now they will become round, plumb maamies soon after marriage.

2) They have a big ego problem. They think no end of themselves and I am sure the same girls if they are born in other castes they will be different.

3) Other caste girls are sympathetic of Brahmin boys and they like their intellactual, soft attitudes.

4) They consider speaking in Tamil below their diginity and speak broken English.

5) They are all hypocrites when it comes to eating, going out etc.