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A Publication of The Pennsylvania State University

Volume 2

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The Best of FourThe Best of Four

Faculty Editor

Jim Manis

Student Editors

Jim Pinkstone

&

Christopher White

Making Connections

and

Examining Our Myths

Volume #2

TheBest of Fouris a publication of The Pennsylvania State University.

The Pennsylvania State University is an equal opportunity university.

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Best of Four: The Students Choice

No. 2 1997

How to contactBest of Four

You can contact Best of

Fourby writing to JimManis, Faculty Editor,

Best of Four, ThePennsylvania StateUniversity, Hazleton, PA

18201-1291.

Or phone 717.450.3189Or Fax 717.450l.3182Or Email

jdm12@psu.edu

For the latest, visit our

web site:www2.hn.psu.edu/faculty/jmanis.htm

The Best of Four: The Students Choice is a publication of the Pennsylvaia State University. All the

student essays contained herein were produced by students registered in English 004 on the Hazle-

ton campus during the fall semester of 1996, and the essays appear here with their written consent.

The Best of Four wishes to offer special thanks to Dr. Monica Gregory, Director of Academic

Affairs, for her assistance in bringing this project to fruition.

The Best of Four: The Students Choice, the Pennsylvania State University, Jim Manis, Faculty

Editor, Hazleton, PA 18201-1291, is a non-profit publication of The Pennsylvania State University.

Copyright 1997 The Pennsylvania State University.

The Pennsylvania State University is an equal opportunity university.

Contents

5 ............................................................................................... How to Use This Magazine

6 .................................................................................................... What Is College Writing?

7 ........................................................................................................... The Writing Process

8 .............................................................................................................Writing for a Public

10 .............................................................................. Bostons Treasure by Julio Rodriguez

11 .....................................................................................Life is a Beach by Gerard Delisio

13 ................................................................................................Dreamlandby Mat Ciprich

14 ............................................................................... The Central Hotel by Jacob Gerhard

15 ....................................................................... My Hero, Uncle Bob by Deirdre Haubert16 ............................................................................ Low Fat, Fat Free by Deborah Gaffney

17 .................................................................................... Teen Drug Abuse by Bryce Potzer

19 ...................................................................................................... Trust by Julie Leshock

21 ........................................................................ A True Problem Child by Scott Turkelson

22 .......................................................... My Experience in Health Careby Brandy Knoebel

24 ............................................................................... Domestic Violenceby Julie Pellegrini

25 .......................................................................................... Youth Violenceby Brad Smith

27 ......................................................................................... The Stereotype by Joel Rivera

28 ...............................................................................................Athletes by Michael Benfer

29 ............................................................................. The Art of Lying by Salena Mrozinski

30 .......................................................... My Greatest Football Memory by Robert Sawicki

31 ........................................................................................... Rock Climbingby Bree Black

32 .................................................................. Why I Believe In Ghosts by Jennifer Standen

33 .......................................................................................The Championship by Jeff Klein34 ......................................................................................... The Drab Room by Kristy Rice

35 .............................................................................................. Questions by Kim Devaney

37 ............................................................................Drugs and Peer Pressureby Mike Reilly

38 .......................................................................................................Coming up with Ideas

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Welcome to the second volume of theBest of

Four. We hope you enjoy reading it as much as we

have enjoyed bringing it to you.

The primary purpose ofBest of Fouris to bring

the best writing produced in English 004 to the wid-

est possible audience. Our students have important

stories to tell and powerful voices waiting to be har-

nessed. The students who read these essays will learn

that they too have permission to state what is im-portant to them in a public voice.

In addition to inspiring our students, we also

hope the magazine will direct them to the sources

they will need to access, if they are to achieve

mastery of the written language: their teachers,

their handbooks, and their fellow students.

In several instances through the magazine we

have placed hints and friendly advice and on occa-

sion even some direction concerning a few usage

matters. Basic skills students have difficulty with

mechanics, punctuation and usage. Thats why they

are basic skills students. However, at the college level

we are mostly concerned with organization, devel-

opment, and the assumption of a tone appropriate

for a college audience. Throughout the magazine we

remind students to examine their handbooks on a

regular basis. Almost all of their questions can be

answered there.

Nevertheless, some knowledge and skill level is

required to make the best use of a handbook, and

some handbooks are clearer about some informa-

tion than others. Students need to read their hand-

books, perform some exercises in them and seek as-

sistance whenever possible. The biggest shortcom-

ing among freshmen students, and this is universally

How to Use This Magazine

true, is their unwillingness to seek out help

whenever possible.

No where is that help more user friendly

(in the vernacular of our times) than that which

can be obtained in The Learning Center. Ev-

ery student needs to find this out as soon as

possible.

vAbove all, we should each of us read the

magazine thoroughly, if for no other reason

than to discover what it is that concerns Penn

State students most.

This issue of the magazine is subtitled, Mak-

ing Connections and Examining Our Myths. Here

at the magazine, we realized as we were putting

together the issue that the essays were either

about making connections or examiningmyths, and sometimes both. From eating dis-

orders to an examination of heroes, these writ-

ers make us take a close look at important is-

sues, not only for freshmen in college, but also

for all of us.

As we prepare to enter the Twenty-first

Century, with all of the astounding changes

that have taken place during this centurythis

year marks the 100th anniversary of the dis-

covery of the electron, a discovery, physicists

tell us, as profound as that of fireit has never

been more necessary to take stock of who and

what we are, to examine closely those beliefs we

hold most dear. The essays within these pages

demand that we do just that.

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What Is College Writing?

What is this thing we call college writing?

The short answer is to call it by its proper name,Standard Edited Written American English.

Its English for reasons that ought to be ob-viousthats the language we speak and write.Its American, because our particular brand of

English has some difference from the languagethe British write. We spell the word color with-out a u, while the British spell it colour, for in-

stance. And there are other differences, such asthe use of quotation marks and where punctua-

tion appears when they are used.The word, written, is part of the

name because linguists have taught usthat written language is different fromspoken language, and our concerns with

language are with it as a written prod-uct (as well as producing that product).

The word, edited, appears in thename because that is what we do with

written language at the college level: weedit it. The truth is we always edit lan-guage, spoken as well as written, and nomatter what the circumstances. Quiteoften we are not even aware that we aredoing this. Simply put, editing means

to examine what we are saying beforewe release the words, and to judge thebest we can how the information willbe perceived by our audience, includ-ing how that audience will perceive us. Think of

it this way: When you were young and your sis-ter wanted to borrow your favorite blouse, youdidnt just say no. You spoke in a harsh, sharpvoice, and you reminded her firmly that shenever returns what she borrows. You included

a number of verbal exclamation points as well.Even the family dog edits his communica-

tion: You just fed him a handsome dog dinner,

and then you sit down to eat a steak. Hescrunches in front of you, pulling his legs underhim, peeks up through long dog lashes andwhines pathetically, his body trembling. He

wants your food too.However, while the dogs editingof his com-

munication may be standard fare for him, it doesnot constitute quite what we mean by standard

edited written American English. What we meanby this is the kind of editing outlined in the typi-

cal college writing handbook. It is a form of edit-ing that has been agreed to by many college pro-

fessors, professional editors, profes-

sional writers, and other folks whosejob it is and whose reputations havebeen founded upon successful writ-ten communication. And such thingsas spelling and punctuation and what

constitutes a well written sentencehave been standardized so that thelanguage can be easily used and

readily recognized.You should know that this hasnt

always been true. In fact the standard-ization of written communication isonly about 100 years old; in the main,it has come into prominance in thewake of the Industrial Revolution.

-

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The Writing Process

Years ago, a high school Engl ish

course, preparing seniors for college went

something like this: Every Friday the stu-

dents walked into the classroom and

wrote an essay on a topic that was sprung

on them. They had 57 minutes to think

of something to say, come up with a the-

sis statement, make an outline and an

exciting title, and write a final draft.

The teacher walked between the

rows of seats, gazing over the students

shoulders, and commented on their work

as they produced it.

That comma doesnt belong

there. You need to start a new para-graph. Youve misspelled a word in that

sentence.

It was disconcerting to say the least.

The students learned not to take chances,

not to construct sentences out of the or-

dinary, not to use new words. This sort of

writing was called product writing. The

notion was that we were made to fit into

molds that society determined for us, and

the teachers job was to make sure we

didnt slip out of those molds.

Times do change, though. Employ-

ers began to complain that new employ-ees needed to be creative, able to make

decisions on their own, the kinds of

workers who seek responsibil ity. Other

forces were at work as well within the

world of education. One of the results

was that teachers began to focus on writ-

ing as a process.

In part, they learned this from cre-

ative writing teachers and students. Re-

gardless of all the whys and wherefors,

we have moved from emphasiz ing what a

piece of writing is supposed to be at the

end to how we get there.This doesnt mean that we dont care

what the f inal resul t is. We do . However,

we have learned that being so conscious

of what a work is supposed to be when it

is done keeps us from producing our best

work. Now the emphasis is on the creat -

ing of the product, and this means weve

got to discover the best way to say what-

ever it is we have to say while working

through this process.

It means weve got to do what real

writers have always done: produce many

drafts of work, revising and editing, edit-

ing and revising, over and over again, until

we ei ther get i t right or run out of time.

The Process

The writing process has been bro-

ken down in a variety of ways, but mostly

it looks something like the schematic in

the illustration in the upper right hand

corner of this page.

First, we do the stuff before we be-

gin to actually produce a draftthink-

ing, talking, making jot lists and outlines,

grouping information in any number of

informal ways, making notes, reading, and

anything else that helps us get ready.

Second, we make a draft. And thenanother most likely. Perhaps we go back

to the pre-writing and do some more of

that, reading more material, talking our

ideas out, making additional observations.

Third, we make a revision. Some

writ ers say this is where the real writ ing

starts. At this point we have decided that

weve got the information we want and

more or less the order we want to put it

into. We decide that its time to try out

Pre-writingDrafting

Revising

Editing

Proofreading

various rhetorical stances , to change our

point of view, to reexamine our analysis

of the data. Whatever the case, we look at

the project from a different direction,

under a new light.

Fourth, we decide its time to edit

the revised draft. We have down what wewant to say, bu t now we go through the

piece paragraph by paragraph, sentence

by sentence, word by word, letter by let-

ter, and question everything in the paper.

Is there a better way to say it, a more pre-

cise phrase, a more exact word? And we

ask others to read the material; we even

read it allowed, perhaps tape-recording

it so we can listen to the play back. If

were smart , we go to the learning center

and have a tutor read over the paper wi th

us.

Finally, its time to proofread. Thisis what we do when we know its perfect.

Proofreading is the activity performed on

a piece of writing when its done. Yes,

thats rightwe proofread when we are

done.

Is it time to turn the work in? Maybe,

have you run out of time?

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Writing for a PublicAt the college level it is important to realize that we are writing for someone to read. Com-

ing out of the school system, we often expect that our readers will know what we mean when

we write something. That is, we accept as a given that our readers will share a background with

us so common that a few key words and phrases will suffice to carry our meaning. We learn

from a very early age in life to abstract material from the world, to arrive at conclusions about

this material, and to base judgements

and actions on these judgements.

We also grow up within a culture,

not only the American culture, but the

cultures within our individual communi-ties. Much of what defines our cultures

are the judgements, the abstractions, the

values, which that culture passes on or

even encodes us with. To be an educated

person means to call all of these things

into question, to examine them closely,

to test them in a scientific manner. It also

means that when we deliver our abstrac-

tions, our judgements, our values we

must be prepared to either defend them or at the very least present sufficient data (the specifics)

which will allow our audience (readers, in writing courses) to understand why we hold these values

or arrived at these judgements.

In addition, as college writers we are often called upon to write for audiences who are unfamiliar

with our cultures or our data bases. Some of you are already familiar with the Internet and Email.

You realize that you may be communicating with people all over the world. Certainly you will

communicate with people from around the country. Think about it this way: A student in Duluth,

Minnesota sends an Email to a student in Mobile, Alabama. The Duluth student says it is reallyhot. How hot is it? Would the student in Mobile agree?

Its doubtful. In Duluth a temperature of 75 degrees is considered very hot.

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Dear Instructor:

Best of Fourserves two primary purposes: to provide an illustration of the best writingproduced in the preceding year and to allow the instructor to witness the variety of workproduced within the system for the same course. We hope these essays will serve you wellas you instruct and inspire your students to produce their best work.

The Administration BuildingThe Pennsylvania State Universitys Hazleton Campus

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Bostons Treasure

Every big city has great things that distinguish it from all others. New

York has the Statue of Liberty; Chicago has the Sears Tower; Detroit is

known as the Motor City; and if anything represents Boston, it has to

be the cherished Boston Garden. Home of Bostons basketball and hockey

teams, the Garden has a long history and a rich tradition. It was built in the

nineteen hundreds and has been the sight of many great sporting events; how-

ever, sporting events are not the only activities held in the Garden.

by Julio Rodriguez

Walt Disneys World On Ice, Barnum and Baileys Circus, and various musical per-

formers come each year to do their things for the people of Boston. The Garden is located in

the middle of the city and is part of the train station, so it is always a lively place regardless

of the time of day. It was here that Red Auerback molded the early Boston Celtics in to the

greatest basketball dynasty ever, nicknaming the Garden Reds House.

To get the whole feel of a basketball game and the Boston Garden experience, you must

travel to the Garden by subway. If you look out the window as you approach the arena, you

can see an intimidating sign that reads, You have entered the Garden, there is no coming

back. I still get the same feeling of excitement when I read it, even though Ive seen the sign

hundreds of times. When you get off of the train, you begin to blend in with a mob of people

dressed in various Celtics Basketball wear who are all very eager to enter the Garden and

cheer on their team. After you pay for your ticket and proceed to enter the lobby, the smell

of hot dogs and popcorn fills the air. When you push open the doors to the arena, you feel

a quick rush of cool air. That cool air comes from the ice rink that lies under the famous

parquet floor which so many Boston fans boast about.The first thing that one notices once fully inside the Garden are the sixteen eye-catching

World Championship banners hanging from the rafters (the Celtics have more than any other

NBA team). As you make your way to your seat, you can glance around to see the huge

number of fans that the garden can accommodate (about sixteen thousand). When you reach

your old, stiff, wooden seat and place your soda on the sticky floor, you can feel the history

of the garden surrounding you. Listening to the pre-game music and hearing the cheers of the

fans, you can feel the intensity building up. Its almost game time!

The lights go out and the fans go wild as the introduction of the Celtics begins. You cant

help getting caught up in the excitement, so you join the other fans and begin to yell and

scream with them. The intensity and pride of the fans is evident through the whole

game. Surprised, you look up and notice yourself on the Jumbo Screen. Thats an

incredible feeling because you know that all of the people in the whole arena have their

eyes on you.When the game is over, it doesnt matter whether we won or lost. Its all about the fans

representing Boston and their love for it. People who are not Boston natives now know

how much pride Boston fans have. The excitement doesnt end there, however, because

leaving the Garden is an adventure all in itself. When you finally make it through the

immense crowd and everything settles down a little bit, you review the experience and

notice that you have never gone to a place like the Garden before, and probably never

will again.

So if you ever travel to the city of Boston, the Garden should definitely be on your list

of things to visit. The experience is worthwhile and you might find your new favorite

sports arena.

Making Connections

Young writers oftenpraise writing they ad-mire by saying it flows

really well. Language isvery much a matter ofmaking connections.

Notice the transitionsJulio Rodriguez makes

between his paragraphsin his essay in praise of

the Boston Garden.Look at how he ends one

paragraph and thenbegins the next. Look for

the connecting words.

Controlling Point of View

Controlling the point of viewfrom which a piece of

writing is given allows thewriter to direct the readers

attention. We recognizepoint of view through the

writers use of pronouns.How effective is point ofview in this essay?

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Living in a coastal area, you are used to beaches and ocean water. Over

time these different scenes may even become stale and repetitious. With

more and more trips to these beaches you could become bored, some-

times to the extent of disinterest. Depending on where you live, all of the beaches

can be similarbut in Hawaii there is a vacant volcano that has opened up to

the sea. This area is flowing with exotic fish, clean water, and a beautiful atmo-

sphere.

by Gerard Delisio

Life Is a Beach

Hanauma Bay, located on the southern shore of Oahu, is a shelter from the elements of

the rough ocean for marine wildlife. It is a federally protected park, and it is home to many

fish and sea-dwelling animals. It is an area of extreme

beauty both below and above the water, with magnificent

cliffs and gorgeous trees.

The volcano offers protection not only to the fish in

the bay, but also to the inhabitants located in the volcano,

like animals and trees. The cliffs offer protection from

weather factors such as wind, rain, and pollution caused

by the local area, and the volcano protects Hanauma Bay

from the rest of civilization by allowing it to be a small

world within a large world.

On your journey toward the beach there is beautiful

scenery. Depending on the route you choose, you either see breathtaking shores or astound-

ing houses. You know youre close when you smell the salt in the area and there are no

houses within a mile. Hanauma Bay is located in a very respectable community because its

inhabitants want to keep the area clean and they act on this desire. In the parking lot there

are signs that state, Please Kokua (give respect) and take care of the land.

When you get down the trail, the sand is hot from the warm sun. You immediately run

on your toes through the water just to feel the coolness on your feet. As you get into your

bathing suit, you just cant wait until youre in the water to explore its features. As you take

your first step into the water, it feels good because youve been so hot all day long. With

your mask on you dip your head in the water to look around. You realize that there is a fish

eight inches long circling your feet, and before you know it there is a whole school of about

forty or fifty fish around you. You cant describe what type of fish they are; all you know

is that they are big and have all of the colors of the rainbow. You suddenly wish you were a

camera man forNational Geographic, just so you could share the beauty of both the fish and

your experience with the rest of the world. As you journey farther into the bay, you noticegreat caves and caverns with fish you have never seen before, not even on television. You sit

there in amazement, wondering what life as a fish would be like. You are so blown away by

the beauty that you forget how far youve gone out, and you have to turn back and go in.

Once out of the water you decide to go on a hike, so you bring your picnic gear. While

walking across the beach you start thinking about what is ahead, not forgetting how much

fun you had in the water and hoping to top that. When you reach the trail there are trees

youve never seen before that catch your eye, and you have to take pictures. As you hike

further you are thinking about where you are going to sit down and eat dinner. Finally you

see the place where you want to rest and relax; it is just above the bend and it has the most

gorgeous view (overlooking the Pacific Ocean). As you sit down, you are so lost in the view

You suddenly wish you were a cameraman forNational Geographic, just soyou could share the beauty of both thefish and your experience with the restof the world.

The two principaltypes of clauses are

the independentclause and thedependant clause.Why is one depen-dent and the othernot?

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More about Point ofView

Notice that in Delisiosessay, he employs the

second person point ofview throughout. Nor-mally writers reservesecond person point ofview for writing thatgives directions to areader, directions that

are meant to be followed. Delisio, however, doesnt expect us to actually go down to hisbeach. Nevertheless he writes as if he were speaking directly to the reader, and in asense, he is giving us directions. In fact, in this piece of descriptive writing, which is struc-

tured as if it were a narrativethat is, telling the reader a storyDelisio uses the secondperson point of view to draw the reader into his description, much like an oral story teller.The second person point of view helps to create a sense of urgency. We are made to feelthat the narrator, the speaker of the essay, is standing before us, looking us in the eye,speaking directly to us, not unlike a television courtroom prosecuter, leaning into our faces,recounting our actions, our thoughts, our motives.

Exercise: What would happen to this essay if the point of view were changed. As anexercise, rewrite the essay in first person. Then write the essay in third person, making thegeography itself the subject of the essay.

Exercise: In the second paragraph, Delisio begins three independent clauses in a rowwith It is. Rewrite the paragraph so that this structure is eliminated in all three instances,but make sure that all sentences are complete.

that you cant think of any bad thoughts...except for the thought of having to leave soon.

When you get down to the beach you head up the trail to your car. While walking up

you have a view of the area and all of your memories: the memories of the sand, the fish, the

trees, and the view. Just then you start thinking about memories youve had in the past and

what the future holds in store for you, and you realize that this trip has topped it all. You

start to wonder, Can life get harder after this trip? Then you realize that it can, because

you are leaving now.

Want an exercise for writing a fun paragraph? Heres one from Professor Bill Ellis:

Write a short parapgraph, using one of the following as the opening sentence and one as a

closing sentence.

1. You always hear about the Easter bunny, but you never hear about the Easter wolf.

2. Its here!

3. Drive to work in reverse.4. Have you ever walked by a playground and had your memory jogged by some kids

singing a song you sang as a kid?

5. This too is my life.

6. Grasping things.

7. You might earn a future.

8. By the middle of October, Ohio seemed ripe for the frost.

9. I had trouble picking a subject.

10. Oh, never mind.

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In the heart of the New York fingerlakes, nestled in between the hills lies the

small village of Watkins Glen. This quaint town possesses the same attrac-

tions as most of New Yorks waterfront villages, but it also possesses a

truly magnificent glen. Tucked away in the mountain, the glen is unknown to

many, keeping its mystique alive.

by Matt Ciprich

Dreamland

As you enter the unassuming parking lot, the attendant directs you to the entrance of

the glen. You begin your journey by twisting your way through a stone corridor. Observing

the constant flickering of the guide lamps and the non-stop sound of water trickling, your

mind begins to wander to a new state. These sights and sounds prepare you for the realm you

are entering.

Upon leaving the corridor, you are greeted by a beautiful waterfall that eases your mind

into a relaxed state. As your eyes wander, they observe a magnificent setting filled with

waterfalls, berry bushes, and an unaltered gorge. As you wonder through these sites you

understand what the corridor was preparing you for: a world filled with beauty that brings

relaxation to all who visit.

After observing your location, you begin to trek up the path of your

choice. The paths take you under and over dozens of waterfalls, ranging

from five to almost one hundred feet high. The trails allow you to experience

the true force of the water while exposing you to most of the sheer rock

sides of the glen. Throughout your journey you can stop and view the

everlasting rainbow from the constant mist of the falls, or rest for a bit on

one of the benches overlooking the winding path of the water. The feelings you experience

allow you to bounce in and out of reality like a child in Disney World.Once at the top, you can enjoy a cold beverage or an ice cream cone to prepare you for

your jaunt back. While descending through the glen you can choose to take many different

routes. You may want to skim the upper ledge or continue back down the way you came. No

matter which path you choose you will not be disappointed, for all of the routes bestow the

splendor of the glen. The glen has so much to offer you could probably spend several days

there without grasping the entire mystique of this remarkable setting.

Watkins Glen delivers a sense of new discovery that leaves you with an appreciation of

what our world has to offer. It adds something to your personality and alters your percep-

tion, all the while allowing you to unwind from the tortures of your daily life. You may never

revisit the glen, but your mind will drift back often to experience all of its glory. From start

to finish, Watkins delivers an atmosphere where perfect harmony reigns.

Using Colons

Students often know that colons can be used to introduce items in a series, or lists,but they may be employed for more subtle reasons as well. Take a look at the lastsentence in the third paragraph of Ciprichs essay. The words following the colon inthis sentence do not constitute a list. How does the colon function in this sentence?Try writing a sentence using this technique. Be careful not to over use specializedforms of punctuation.

You can stop and viewthe everlasting rainbowfrom the constant mist ofthe falls.

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The Central Hotelby Jacob Gerhard

If you like brown leaves, flannel shirts, and big, juicy steaks, then a trip tothe north side of Columbia County this fall is for you. Way up north in the

back country of Benton, Pennsylvania, there is a small one-road town called

Central. Along this road sits the Central Hotel, well known by the local popu-

lace, bikers, seasonal hunters, and yuppie summer campers who frequent it for

the mild, laid-back atmosphere that the establishment offers.

I had my first experience with this intriguing place three years ago while working as a

lifeguard at the nearby Boy Scout Camp. My family decided to rescue me from my monoto-

nous, nondescript camp food and treat me to supper at the Central Hotel. After two weeks

of camp food my mind began to fantasize about where I was going and what I would eat.

Those fantasies (and much more) came true after we arrived.

Before me stood a three-story, white-sided building with a welcoming porch extending

along its entire front. As we entered the establishment there was a bombardment of sights,

sounds, and smells upon my senses.

A taxidermists dream greeted me when I entered the 110 year old structure; I became

mesmerized by the inanimate stare of a stuffed buffalo head and the petrified scowls

of varied species of critters. Sightless stares of fur and feather and the diverse crowd

of patrons competed for my visual curiosity in the semi-lit atmosphere. The more

pleasant properties of pipe smoke mingled with the char broiled smell of burgers

and steaks. These sensations were further combined with a low-decibel hum coming

from the many heads bent eating and faces full of expression deep in conversation

ranging from chit chat to heated discussion.The filled-to-capacity dining room strained the operation of the kitchen, causing

my stomach to churn for satisfaction. As patrons eyes seemed to search for a specific

waitress laden with a tray of much anticipated delicacies destined for their tables, I found my

eyes making contact with this varied company of yuppies, bikers, flannel shirters and others

doing the same. This sense of common interest gave rise to further curiosity as to what I

might also share in conversation or in common. Would these conversations bring me to the

conclusion that surface appearance can only be skin deep and just a form of expression, not

a barrier to common ground?

There is also a bar snuggled in a separate room where patrons may mix more closely for

an afternoon drink. It is in this much darker room where the stares become more than chance

encounters and frequently evolve into common ground for the comparing and contrasting of

ideas. People in the bar always seem to be either talking with other patrons or just salting

the night away.A strong sense of adventure combined with a desire to relax and mix with varied but

lively company basted by good friends and atmosphere is all that one needs to seek out this

institution. Any person in need of relief from the repetitive features of work and personal

duty and looking for a divergent weekend evening may act out his or her fantasy by becoming

(or at least mixing with) a biker, a flannel shirter, a yuppie, or whomever is nearby to find

companionship, conversation, or just a study of humanity at the Central Hotel. The readers-

turned-adventurers who decide to chance the trip and partake in this true-to-life place may

then decide how they want their steaks and how fast they want to become part of a discus-

sion with a friend or stranger.

I became mesmerizedby the inanimate stareof a stuffed buffalohead.

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My Hero, Uncle Bob

by Deirdre Haubert

This year at the Fourth of July Barbecue, my family and I agreed to put

together a book of family portraits. We each have to choose a family

member and write a character sketch of that person. My choice was my

rebelling Uncle Robert (Uncle Bob), who was convicted of murder and finally

escaped from prison after two years.

Uncle Bob was tall and skinny with dirty blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes that

would sparkle like the sun whenever he smiled. His hair, which was very curly, reached his

chin where his thick beard was. To most people Uncle Bob is guilty of manslughter; but, in

fact, he is the most passionate and brilliant man I have ever met.

Uncle Robert was always willing to talk with me about everything and anything. WhenI was little he would take me out often just to spend quality time with his favorite niece. He

took me fishing, Christmas caroling, trick-or-treating, to carnivals, and he even taught me

how to ride my bike (which I still remember like it was yesterday). He took me through the

steps of learning how to ride my bike with utmost patience and understanding. I will never

forget the way that Uncle Robert cared for me.

Though the majority of people perceived my Uncle Robert as a criminal, I disagree

because in my eyes and in the eyes of the Lord, his actions were done in self-defense. For

many years my uncle and his neighbor were in disagreement with just about everything. One

day Uncle Bob came home and heard a ruckus next door. He decided to check it out, and he

found his neighbor beating his wife to a bloody pulp, which would have soon lead to her

death if nothing were done about it.

When Uncle Bobs neighbor realized that he was there, he went after my uncle, and in

self defense my Uncle Robert ended up killing his neighbor. When he was put on trial he hada horrible lawyer, so he was convicted of murder in the second degree. Uncle Robert never

had a doubt in his mind that he was innocent and just protecting himself, and he escaped after

two years of what he called hell.

After my Uncle Robert freed himself from his claustrophobic cell, he secretly came to

me for about an hour and we reminisced about our joyful past times. I realized that this was

good-bye, but I knew that he had not wanted me to realize this and hurt me more than I

already had been. We both cried on one anothers shoulders. When he said that he had to

leave, I could not let go of him and bear the thought of not seeing my beloved uncle ever again.

He told me to keep his visit a secret and to always remember the good times that we had. My

last memory of him was the silhouette of his back and his half-turned head with tear-filled

eyes waving good-byeforever. Until now, I have not told anyone of my Uncle Bobs secret

visit. I love my uncle, and although others question the morality of his actions, he will

always remain alive in my heart and soul. For me, my Uncle Bob is the greatest man who ever

lived.

Ellipsis Marks

Young writers like to employ dramatic punctuation to provide emphasis, but you must becareful that the situation warrants it. In the last paragraph of Hauberts essay, she employsellipsis marks to suggest a dramatic pause between the words forever and good-by. Doyou think her essay has earned this dramatic moment? What are the other uses of ellipsismarks? Check your handbook, and make sure you know when to include a regular period.

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Kelly was the tallest girl in our class, so it was easy to see that maturity had set in earlier

for her than for the rest of us. She was always being teased about her height and weight when

compared to other kids. During this period I became aware of Kelly becoming obsessive

about her weight.

Kelly and I planned everything we did together, and one night we decided to go to our

friends birthday party. We knew that almost everyone from our class would be there; and,

considering boyfriends were our top priority then, we took time to prepare to look our best.We wore our best clothing and made sure that not a single piece of hair was

out of place.

The night was going well for the both of us until one of our classmates

made a rude comment about Kelly. She made it clear to everyone that she

looked sort of fat. I could see that Kelly was upset and humiliated by this

remark, so we decided to leave. The whole way home I tried to assure her

that she was not fat by telling her that I thought she was beautiful just the

way she was and that beauty comes from within rather than what is on the

outside. Even though my words gave her some comfort, I could tell that she

was still hurt from the remark.

Over the next couple of months, Kelly skipped meals and exercised frequently. When

she would decide to eat, she allowed herself only small portions of fruits and vegetables. I

never mentioned any of Kellys actions to her parents or anyone else, but I wish I wouldhave.

Kellys weight dropped dramatically. After a few months of continuing this so-called

diet, she looked as if she were starving. At the height of five feet and eight inches, she

weighed only eighty-eight pounds. One day in school, I overheard my teachers talking about

someone passing out in the hallway. They did not have to mention any namesI already

knew that it was Kelly. She was taken to the hospital nearby where she was given I.V.s to

regulate her nutrition intake.

After school I stopped by the hospital to see if she was all right. I can still remember

how awful she looked. Her hair was dry and thinning, and her skin seemed almost translu-

cent from the way she had been treating her body. She stayed in the hospital for two weeks

before she was released. She then had to attend meetings twice a week to help her cope with

her eating disorder.

Even after the programs Kelly has attended, she still watches what she eats. Every-

thing must be either low fat or fat free. She eats only twice a day: once in the morning and

once at supper time. Her weight still fluctuates from about ninety-five pounds to one

hundred and five pounds.

Anorexia nervosa is an eating disorder that affects many young women in our society.

In Kellys case, anorexia seems to have taken control of her body and mind. At one time

Kelly and I were best friends, but now things have changed. The only priority that she has

now is to keep her weight as low as she can. I still keep in touch with Kelly to see how she

is doing, and I hope that someday she will be able to overcome the struggle she has with

anorexia and return to being the person I miss and remember wellmy best friend.

Imet Kelly on the first day of kindergarten in 1983. We were the only two

kids at the bus stop that day, so we found it easy to get along. We

became the best of friends during our elementary and high school years,

and pressures of popularity and acceptance were a major strain for both of us.

by Deborah Gaffney

Low Fat, Fat Free

The only priority thatshe has now is tokeep her weight aslow as she can.

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Teen Drug Abuseby Bryce Potzer

Imagine being a sixth grade teacher and having the question in the back of

your mind, Are my students playing an innocent game or passing around ajoint at recess? This is happening in many schools today. It not only hap-

pens in the cities, but also in the small towns that everyone has always consid-ered to be safe. Today, a high school student in a rural town can get anydrug that he or she wants within twenty-four hours or less.

Students can get a hit of cocaine for as little as ten dollars and LSD for as little as three

dollars. These are major drugs that can kill, yet students have immediate access to them.

Drug abuse among teenagers is at an all-time high, but who is to blame? What are the causes

of drug abuse? Does it start at home because of parents, at school because of peer pressure,

or with each person because young people just dont have the information to make the

correct choices about what they should do when confronted with drugs?

These days, drug abuse has almost doubled among teenagers. Can parents really beblamed for this? The Institute for Health Policys Substance Abuse: the Nations Number

One Health Problem states that

[b]y the 8th grade, 70 percent of youth report having tried alcohol. Ten percent

have tried marijuana and 2 percent cocaine, and 44 percent have smoked cigarettes.

By the twelfth grade, about 88 percent have used alcohol, 37 percent have used

marijuana, 8 percent cocaine, and 63 percent have smoked cigarettes. Clearly,

substance abuse begins early for many young people. ( 22 )

Parents may not be to blame, but they must realize that asking their children questions does

not qualify as distrust. Parents usually have less factual information about drugs than the

children themselves.

Even after speaking to parents at home, students still must overcome peer pressure in

school. Peer pressure can cause a student who knows the dangers of drug use to do

something that he or she would not normally do just to fit in. The most common drug that

students are pressured into trying is marijuana. This is a drug that students can get very

easily. Drug abuse usually starts, for example, when Joe goes to a party and sees Jim (whom

Joe looks up to) smoking marijuana. Joe knows that it is bad, but he still does it just to be

a part of the crowd. Even when students are well informed, they will tend to do what their

friends do because they want to fit in. After a person has been taking drugs for a long period

of time, that person tends to end up trying stronger drugs, such as cocaine and heroin.

Cocaine and heroin are the biggest drug killers of students in college. Colleges are where

students have better access to these deadly narcotics than anywhere else.

Juveniles who do not have friends who do drugs are in the worst shape of all. They may

experiment with drugs that they have heard about. Some of them have no idea regarding what

particular drugs will do to their bodies. They only hear vague accounts from people who

have taken drugs. They also have no idea regarding how much of a drug to take. This is when

the drug situation becomes even more serious. Imagine being a mother or father who gets a

telephone call at two in the morning saying that your son is in the emergency room because

of a drug-related car accident, and that he is not expected to last the night. This end to his life

could have possibly been stopped by just talking to him. Kids like this are the ones who are

killed because they think that they can do things that are impossible. In one incident, a girl

had taken an overdose of LSD and then tried to remove her skin

because she thought that she was a banana. If the kids would apply the information that they

College Writing

Often we are re-quired to site fromsecondary sourcesin college levelwriting. In mostLiberal Arts courses,this will require youto be familiar withthe Modern Lan-guage Associations(MLA) parenthetical

documentation style.Your handbook is anexcellent resourcefor learning to do thisproperly.

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have learned, then most of the underage fatalities could be stopped.

Kids may not like to admit it, but their parents are their most influential role models.

Kids have always looked up to their parents. Young people must be spoken to about the

effects of drugs, because communication is the best weapon of defense available. Even if all

of the information is not known, every little bit counts. It should be known that drugs kill.

Drugs are not racist. Drugs are not sexist. The only way to stop the course that drugs canrun in life is by acknowledging the truth about them.

Work Cited

Institute for Health Policy. Substance Abuse: the Nations Number One Health Problem.

Washington, D.C.: GPO, 1994.

Working with Numbers

Potzers essay requires him to use numbers in the quoted material in the secondparagraph. Normally, numbers one through twelve are written out while the numbers13 and above are written in their Arabic form. However, anytime you begin a sen-tence with a number, no matter how large it is, it should be written in its word form.On the other hand, when you employ quite a few numbers, such as Potzers quotedmaterial does, they should be delivered in a consistent form, unless they begin asentence.

Long Quotes

Notice that the quoted material in Potzers second paragraph does not have quota-tion marks around it. The quote is over four lines in length and is set off throughindentation, two tabs from the left hand margin. The Modern Language Association(MLA) style parentheses enclosing the page number from the document Potzer isquoting is located after the period. Check your handbook to learn where the periodgoes in a short quote of three lines or less.

Looking for good sources to quote?

Government publications offer some of the best material, espe-cially for statistical data and expert opinions. Dont let the longtitles or simple black print on white binding keep you from thesevaluable resources.

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Trust

by Julie Leshock

Its nine in the morning and pieces of my car are scattered all over the

interstate. I hear voices around me saying, Are you okay, Miss? Is every

thing all right? It was hard for me to open my eyes because I was in

complete disbelief of everything that had just happened to me. In a matter of

seconds my life had completely changed course. If only I had not taken my

eyes off of the road!

The people at the scene of the accident were concerned with my well-being, and

surprised that I was in one piece (thanks to my seat belt). All I could think about was my car,

and how upset my father was going to be when he saw its condition. I was miles away from

home, and years away from ever gaining my fathers trust again.The next couple of days were hard to face. My father did not know I had taken this

journey to Williamsport, and he could not understand why I would take such a risk. I really

didnt think that going to visit my boyfriend at college would put my life in danger.

I dont mind the physical pain the accident has caused me, but the emotional pain from

upsetting my father is tearing me apart inside. Over and over again I ask myself, How, how

could I do such a thing? But rethinking everything I could have done does not change what

I did. Through the experience of the accident I learned to abide by the morals and values that

my parents have taught me because, in some situations, listening to them can save me pain

and regret.

On the morning of the accident everything was going well. It was Friday before Labor

Day weekend, and I was anxious to get up bright and early to tackle the long journey back to

Hazleton. Not far into the journey home from Williamsport I had a shooting pain in my

stomach that told me something was wrong, but I went on thinking that I had forgotten

something at my boyfriends house.

Traveling eastbound on interstate I-80, I checked my rear view mirror for trucks. They

are my biggest fear while driving on the interstate. I remember thinking how much the truck

drivers frightened me when they roared along the route to their destinations. I was so afraid

of being in their way that I kept glancing at the road behind me. Before I

could grasp what was happening, my car veered off of the road into some

loose gravel. I tried desperately to steer my car back onto the road, but

panic and fear took control of my actions.

Swerving from left to right, I realized that all attempts to counter steer

were a failure because I had not tapped on the brakes to take off my cruise

control. Everything inside my car was thrown in various directions when I

started spinning out of control. My car then continued to spin off the road, hitting both the

front and back against an embankment.

Everyone Ive talked to has said that accidents happen, and that I should be grateful

that I am in satisfactory condition, but if only my well-being could take away the pain and

guilt that I feel for hurting my father, I would agree with them. Over the years my father and

I have been through everything together. It seems like now, after the accident, I need him the

most. Each time my father and I have an argument, I wonder how I will make it through

without him by my side. I look to my father for support in everything that I do because I

know that he believes in me and can teach me all of the hard lessons in life that I must learn.

In learning this lesson I have found that I should trust and believe in my parents. This

lesson has changed my whole outlook on life. I now make more responsible decisions (that

[I]f only my well-being couldtake away the pain and guiltthat I feel for hurting my father.

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also make my parents happy). Learning lifes lessons can be a hard and painful process, but

I have found that I should always take my parents guidance.

I think that all of lifes difficult lessons are meant to be learned the hard way, which

sometimes makes learning through experience very dangerous. This lesson that I have learned

not only taught me to think before I act, but also to confide in my parents, who always know

best. Many lessons in my life have taught me right from wrong, but never did I realize that

learning from them could mean the difference between life and death.

Writing the Time of Day

In her first sentence, Leshock begins her essay with the wonderfully dramaticandunderstatedsentence: Its nine in the morning and pieces of my car are scatteredall over the interstate. A question students frequently ask is how do you write time?Generally there are two acceptable ways for college writers to deliver time: We

either write it out (five oclock in the morning), or we give the numerical equivalent(5:00 a.m.), always remembering to add the a.m. or p.m. and to properly punctuatethe abreviation with periods after each letter. The letters may be either written inlower case or upper, but we should always be consistant. Of course you may seetime written in many other formats, even mixing formats, in print, but in college we tryto adhere to that strange beast, Standard Edited Written American English.

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A True Problem Childby Scott Turkelson

It is virtually impossible today to be unaware of the prevalence of illicit

drugs in American life. The problem is that many people acquiring these

drugs are the youth of the nation. According to some sources over 50

percent of all high school seniors have reported using an illicit drug sometime

in their lives. Many children who use drugs come from homes that have been

broken by divorce. When my Aunt Agnes separated from her husband and

received a divorce, her young children were traumatized more than she had

anticipated.

Aunt Agnes has two children, Johnathan and Mary Kate. Mary Kate was five and

Johnathan was nine at the time of the divorce. When my Aunt and her husband divorced, her

children felt alone. During the divorce settlement, the judge ordered them to live

with their mother. Like many other single mothers, Agnes had to juggle a full-time

job with the responsibilities of raising two children at home. She had no other

income because her ex-husband left the area and did not pay alimony or child

support. It was easy for my aunt to lose track of everything that was going on

around her because she worked many long hours.

Her eldest child, Johnathan, started to act up in class and pick fights with

other students. Often my aunt had to go to school and pick him up because he had

fought another student. His problems began to worsen from then on, and his

grades took a big drop. He never was a great student, but until then he had always

passed his courses. When my aunt received word that he was failing some of his

classes, she was furious. She set rules, but since she was not around to enforce

them twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, he would break them. Johnathan then

started to hang out with a crowd that had a bad reputation. His addiction started with

cigarettes, then worked its way up to alcohol and drugs. My aunt missed most of the signs

due to the fact that she worked many hours to support her family. At around age thirteen,

Johnathan started to experiment with drugs. He used marijuana regularly for about a year,

then he turned to harder drugs such as acid and cocaine. This was when my aunt knew that

there was definitely something wrong. She had suspected that something was wrong in the

past, but when she confronted him he would always deny her accusations.

John abused these drugs for about two years. He would not come home for days at a

time, leaving his mother to worry about his safety. When he was sixteen, the police caught

him trying to purchase illicit drugs. They took him into custody and put him in jail. He was

given a choice between staying in jail or undergoing rehabilitation; he chose rehabilitation.

Due to his years of steady drug abuse, Johnathan needed a great deal of help. The harder

drugs, such as LSD and cocaine, left him with permanent problems, such as paranoia,anxiety, and sleeplessness, for years after he was clean. John spent three years in a hospital

for drug rehabilitation; when he was released he was a different person.

Johnathans sister Mary Kate, who is now nineteen years old, entered the United

States Army in order to escape the problems in her immediate family. At twenty-two years

of age, John must reside with my aunt because he cannot function by himself in the Real

World. He receives Social Security and is employed at minimum wage when he obtains a

job, though he never keeps it for any length of time.

Seeing my cousin go through drug addiction and its aftermath makes me think twice

about taking illicit drugs. I see what the drugs did to Johnathans mind and soul and think of

how I could never be like that.

Semicolons

Use semicolons to joinindependent clauses whenthey are not joined bycordinate conjunctions.

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My Experience in Health Careby Brandy Knoebel

Iam very experienced in dealing with health care and health insurance. I

have seen many close relatives develop severe health problems that have

required hospitalization. My mother was diagnosed with ovarian cancer

when I was eleven years old.Cancer runs in my mothers side of my family. My grandmother on that side of the

family died of cancer, and my grandmothers sister (my mothers aunt) also died of cancer.

My mother was very aware of the history of cancer that ran in the family. She would go to

the hospital to be tested twice a year, and when she was forty-one she was diagnosed. This

hit my family very hard, and since I was young I was only told that my mother was sick. My

sister was eighteen and in her first year of college, so my parents explained to her what was

going to happen. She was told about all of the possible approaches that they could take to

eliminate the cancer.

The best procedure for my mothers type of cancer was radiation treatment. The

hospital started her off with medication to strengthen her body so she would be able to

handle the high level of radiation that the body parts around the cancer were about to receive.

The radiation was given to her through an out patient process. My father would take my

mother to the hospital twice a month. They would go in the morning and the nurses would

prepare her for the procedure, give her radiation, and monitor her for a couple of hours

afterward; then she was allowed to go home. When my mother and father would return

home, my mother would be extremely sick and have very little strength. After a couple of

days of being sick and weak, she would return to her normal self. My mother had quit her job

when she was diagnosed. My father did not want her home alone all day, so he hired our

cleaning lady full-time to stay with my mother until he came home from work. My whole

family was very hopeful. Everyone thought the radiation would destroy the cancer.The next year, it was explained that my mothers sickness was not going to go away.

My mother and father explained to me what cancer was and how they tried to get rid of it.

I remember understanding what they were telling me, but I could not understand why my

mother had it; why didnt someone elses mother get sick? I was not ready to accept that my

mother was going to dieno one was.

At that point my mother was very sick. The radiation did not kill the cancer, and there

was no hope of removing it. The doctor said that the procedure to remove the cancer would

most likely kill her. My mother wished to discontinue the radiation treatment because it was

only making her sicker. My father did so, and he hired a live-in nurse. She took care of my

mother twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, and my mother started to recover some

of her strength. Louise, the live-in nurse, worked with her every day, and soon she was able

to sit at the dinner table with us and eat solid food. She could even walk around.

One night I was awakened by my sister, who was hysterical. My mother had slippedinto a coma. The ambulance took her to a hospital, and my father rode in the ambulance with

her while my sister and I followed. At the hospital we were told that they werent sure if she

would come out of the coma. We sat with her all night. The next day my father sent my sister

and me home to eat and sleep. We came back a little while later, and that night she came out

of the coma. We were extremely relieved, but we all knew that the next time we would not

be that lucky.

Most of my mothers organs werent working correctly at that point. She could no

longer sit up on her own, let alone walk. My father had to buy a hospital bed so that she

could be comfortable at home, because my mother wanted to spend her last months with her

The Dash

At the end of herfourth paragraph,Knoebel uses adashto signal a

sudden change. Thesituation she is

describing is dra-matic, and the dashis a more powerful

piece of punctuationthan a period.

Handbooks gener-ally list three uses for

the dash; checkyours to learn the

othr two.? Be carefulto use dashes

judiciously; overusesimply tips the

reader off that thewriter is very inexpe-

rienced.

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family. They set up the bed in my parents bedroom, and my

father set up a cot right next to her for him to sleep on.

One morning about three months later, I was woken up by

the sound of my father talking to someone on the phone. I could

hear the pain in his voice; my mother had died in her sleep. I can

not say exactly what I was thinking. All I knew was that I was

glad that every night for as long as I could remember I was able to

tell her that I loved her before I went to bed.

This was a life-altering experience. It taught me about life and many other things, and

I can say this: if my family did not have health care or health insurance, my mother would

not have been able to spend her last months with us. No one has the right to take away that

from my family. My father would not have been able to pay for all of the care andhospitalization that my mother needed if we did not have insurance either.

Health care and heath insurance are a necessity today. People can not afford to go into

the hospital or even get sick if they are not insured.

Paragraph Development

In short essay writing there are three basic types of paragraphs: the introductory para-

graph, the body paragraph and the closing paragraph. Each of these types have important

functions to perform in a piece of writing, suggested by their respective names.

The introductory paragraph performs much the same function as you do when you intro-

duce one person to another. If you do a good job of introducing Mary to Bill, you will provide

Bill with a connection, a reason why he should know Mary. Sometimes, of course, that

reason can be self-evident. When writing, you must know who your reader is, what the

reader needs to know about the material, and what the readers needs are with regards to

the material and the reason you are providing the reader with that material. If you are

writing an exam answer in history for Dr. Aurand, you need not have a very well developed

or particularly entertaining introduction; on the other hand, if you are writing an essay aboutthe sibling rivalry you suffered through with your little brother, you need to tell the reader

some background material so that he or she can visualize the setting, and you need to

provide some rationale for your telling this personal history to whomever your reader is.

Just who that reader is will make a difference too. For instance, your psychiatrist has

different needs for reading such material than another student in your class who not only

does not know you but is a single child and thus has never had such an experience.

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Domestic Violence

by Julie Pellegrini

In my short lifetime Ive seen domestic violence on television, but I never

thought that I would see it in my own family. My Aunt Carol and Uncle

Bob exchanged vows on April 18, 1985. They appeared to be a happy

couple and very much in love when she came over to our house one night with

bruises and claimed she had fallen down the stairs. We accepted the excuse

because everyone has tripped on that particular staircase in her home. Every-

thing went back to normal, or so we thought.

Soon after the unexplained bruises appeared, my aunt became pregnant. We

were all happy for her except for my uncle. He had never wanted children becausehe thought that it would take the time he and my aunt could spend alone together

away from them.

Throughout my aunts pregnancy my uncle refused to acknowledge her condi-

tion, and my aunt continued to arrive at our house with mysterious bruises. We

were all suspicious and we questioned my aunt, but she claimed that everything

was fine. After nine months she had a beautiful baby boy named Alan. He was one

of the cutest babies Ive ever seen, with blonde hair and bright blue eyes.

Even after the babys birth, arguments, fights, and bruises were kept a secret

from us. I will never forget about one of the incidents that we eventually discov-

ered.

By the time Baby Allen was ten years of age, their family had to move in with

us. We were told that they moved in due to financial reasons, but the secret that my

aunt kept from us was revealed. We heard arguing between my aunt and uncle

repeatedly; however, we didnt intrude on their privacy. We probably should have.

We never witnessed my uncle strike his family until one hot summer day. Alan used

his fathers wrench to fix his skateboard and left the wrench in his room. That day

my uncle decided to do some work on his car when he discovered his wrench was

missing. He then began screaming at Alan and started beating him. He also struck

my aunt with the wrench. My father was outside when he heard the screaming

from inside. He ran in and began fighting with my uncle and kicked him out. My

aunt was crying, and she insisted that she must go with him.

After this incident we encouraged my aunt to get help and leave her husband,

but she claimed that they loved each other and that when they got along he wasnt

physically abusive. My uncle made a promise to my aunt to never hit Alan again,

and so far he has kept it. We just wish he would stop emotionally and physicallyhurting my aunt.

In many situations which involve abuse the authorities should be notified.

Unfortunately, we had too much respect for my aunts request to let her solve her

own problems. We love my aunt dearly, and we have to respect her feelings. That

is why we thought that we couldnt become involved. I guess my aunt stuck to her

vows when she said I do, but she has to realize that there is a time when she must

learn to say I dont.

Picking Topics

As you are well aware,domestic violence is a hot

topic within our society.One of the old adages

from writing courses is thatyou must have courage to

write well and you must tellthe truth. If we are to have

impact as writers, we mustbe prepared to reveal thetruth even when it may be

painful. Of course eachone of us must make the

choice about just what wewill reveal in a public

fashion. Remember, incollege we are writing forthe purpose of publishing

our work.

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Youth Violence

by Brad Smith

Most people in the United States have experienced violence directly or

indirectly. It is impossible at this date and time to not come in

contact with crime and violence. In the past I had a first-hand expe-

rience with violence. This event left a long-lasting impression on me, and I can

still remember almost every detail.

When we were a couple of hundred yards into the dark parking lot, one of the guys that

was following us yelled out, Hey, wait up! We continued toward the car at a faster pace

hoping he was not addressing us. The group of guys ran to catch up, and when they did one

of them confronted me and started asking me questions. He wanted to know where I bought

my jacket and how much it cost, and then he asked me if he could try it on. It occurred to me

that these guys wanted to rob me. After I refused to let the stranger try on my jacket, he said

that I wouldnt let him try it on because of his race. I told him it was not like that at all. I was

very nervous because the people who were harassing us were older and bigger than any of us.

They circled around us and I knew it wasnt going to be easy to get out of this one.

One of the people in the group said, Im going to be honest with you. Were from New

York City, and were looking to get some jackets and whatever else. I wondered why he

didnt get a job and buy these things like other people did. The situation got more drastic

when he reached into his jacket with one hand as if he had a gun and said, Somebody better

hand over their stuff, or theyre going to get shot. I dont know why, but my gut instincts

told me he was bluffing and I didnt move. Was this stupid? Probably, but at the time I valued

my belongings enough to take the chance.

He then grabbed my jacket and tried to rip it off of me. I threw his hands off me, but

another kid helped him push me alongside a car away from my friends. Adrenaline and fear

pumped through me. I recall looking for my friends or someone else in the parking lot for

help. John and Craig were somewhere being occupied by the others. The two that were now

pinning me to a car began to swing at me, and I fought back the best I could. Suddenly, for

some reason, they backed off and left, possibly because security was coming.

I took a quick look and saw nothing. I thought that my friends had probably taken off.

I made my way back to the mall, disoriented and confused. I hoped to find security or some

more of my friends; however, I couldnt find anyone.

After unsuccessfully searching for help, I decided to go out to the doors and see if

maybe Craig and John had come back for me and were waiting in the car outside. I walked out

and saw Craig making his way toward me. John soon pulled up to pick us up. We all talked

and through this I found out that the guys harassed them both too. Craigs gold chain had

been stolen. This chain meant more to him than its cash value because it had been passed

down through his family from his great grandfather. Johns jacket was ripped in his struggle

to escape.

Approximately three years ago (when I was a sophomore in high school), twofriendsand I went to a mall that was close to where I lived to hang out and shop a little. It was not

uncommon for young people to go to the mall to see a movie or to just get together with a

couple of friends. On that cold, winter day, we had been at the mall for a couple of hours and

had decided to leave. By that time it was dark, and we exited the main entrance and headedtoward my friend Johns car. As we went out the doors, my friend Craig noticed about five

people following us. He looked at us and said, Something is up. Refusing to believe we

were in any danger, we ignored Craig and continued toward the car.

The Federal Gov-ernment reportsthat actual number ofviolent crime hasdecreased over thepast few years. Yetour perception ofsociety remains aviolent one. On theone hand reasonseems to rule; on the

other the worldseems completelyirrational. What sortof world do we livein? What sort ofworld do we thinkwe live in?

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Fortunately, we were not physically hurt. I never told the police or even my parents

about the incident because there was really nothing that could be done. I felt angry for a long

period of time after this occurred, and I guess I still do to some degree. I lost a tremendous

amount of trust that I had for people as an adolescent, and I became less naive to the ways

of world. Ive found myself being more careful when I leave places at night. I am still very

friendly with Craig and John. We dont talk about the incident any more, but I am sure there

are times when we have all thought back on it. One good thing that came out of this is that it

made our friendships stronger. My friends could have taken the easy way out and left me at

the mall that night, but they didnt. I think it is a rarity to find true friends who wont turn

their backs on you when trouble arises. They didnt, and I have great respect for them

because of it.

Paragraph Development

Body paragraphs are the meat and potatoes of your essay; they are where youdevelop your points, make your arguments, and tell your story. When someone saysyour essay is underdeveloped, this is the place it is lacking; when someone says

you need more specifics, this is where you put them.

When we speak of paragraph development, we usually use one or more of thefollowing terms: topic sentences, sub-topic sentences, example sentences,and illustration sentences. Every body paragraph must have at least anexamplesentenceor an illustration sentence.

+ Topic sentencestell the reader the topic of a paragraph and limit the para-graph to that topic.

+Sub-topic sentencesfurther develop the topic.

+ Example sentencesprovide the reader with examples of specific instanceswithin the topic.

+ Illustration sentencesprovide the reader with specific instances of what thetopic is about; in a sense, they tell a brief story or paint a precise picture.

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The Stereotype

Many people across the country see minorities as being criminals or

menaces to society. This is proven through television and movies

by their characterizations of Blacks and Hispanics in specific roles.

The African-American or Hispanic person is often portrayed as a criminal, and

that is where I believe the stereotype begins.

by Joel Rivera

Over the years I have dealt with many types of stereotypes, but none of them have hurt

me as badly as the one that occurred during my freshman year at Stroudsberg High School.

I can remember it very clearly. As I was walking through the halls, a young man approached

me; apparently, someone had broken into his car and stolen his car stereo system. It turns

out that for some unknown reason, it got around that a couple of friends and I, who happento be minorities, go around stealing things because supposedly, thats what Puerto Ricans

do. His exact words were, Hey, you spic, hows about I kick your ass for breaking into my

car and stealing my system? Of course, I was going to stick up for myself, and I spoke out

in my defense. The gentleman didnt agree with what I had to say and replied with, All you

spics are the same, stealing shit, breaking shit, raping white girls, and you all wear your pants

down to the middle of your ass. That statement did not go over well with me, and all hell

broke loose.

It was my third week of school and already I had to put up with white trash thinking

that their shit doesnt stink. I was suspended for five days for that unfortunate incident.

That kind of stereotyping has been presented to me on several occasions since then, and I am

proud to say that I have learned to control my temper and walk away. That was a lesson my

father tried to teach me all my life, but I guess I just had to learn it on my own.

Another memorable incident that makes me laugh every time I think about it occurred

in English class during my sophomore year. I was sitting there minding my own business

when a girl called me blanquito (which means little white boy in Spanish). I turned to her

and asked her why she called me that. She stared me straight in the eye and said, Because

you look Puerto Rican, but you act and talk white. My reply to her was, What does a

Puerto Rican act and talk like? She said something to the effect that they talk as if they were

born and raised in New York city, they act as if they are in charge of everything, and they all

have bad attitudes. I didnt know whether to take it as a compliment or to take it personally.

I chose to laugh it off, and Im lucky that I did because I ended up dating this girl for two and

a half years.

I think everyone knows that stereotyping can be wrong, but it is done so often that it

becomes a habit to some. Not all stereotypes are negative, either. I just seem to agree with the

old saying, If you dont have anything nice to say, dont speak (maybe it didnt go like thatbut close enough). I also agree with this statement: Until we have a nation that can learn to

stop criticizing others because of their skin colors or nationalities, we wont be as strong or

as efficient as we can be, both economically and emotionally.

ParagraphDevelopment

Concluding paragraphsdo just what the nameimplies: arrive at aconclusion. Remember,though, that to concludesomething does not meto simply stop; it meansthat you have arrived atthe end. In mathamatical

terms, this means theanswer; however, inwriting we may notalways have an answer.Nevertheless the readermust be satisfied that allhas been said that isreasonable to sayconsidering what the

thesisof the essay is.The ultimate question

then is has the thesisbeen satisfied?

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Athletesby Michael Benfer

The idea that athletes are stupid, however, is very wrong. For an individual to be

stupid, he or she must be slow-witted, dull, or lacking in intelligence; and this is most

assuredly not the case when it comes to most athletes.

The first time I experienced the stereotype that athletes are

stupid was during my comeback to soccer. Although I had madea full recovery from my ACL injury, my doctor told me that it

was possible for me to re-tear my repaired ligament if I overex-

erted myself during the first couple of games. This meant that if

I were side-tackled or tripped in the right way or if I ran for too

long a period of time, the chance existed that I could seriously

mess up my left knee. It was for that reason that my friends told

me that I was stupid for playing soccer again. Even my grandfather told me I was crazy.

The main driving force behind my return to soccer was the thrill of competition and the

excitement of the game. For example, I make split-second decisions while running down the

field dribbling the ball. In my head I must go over tactical plays, such as whether to chip the

ball over the defenses heads to my strikers, pass the ball backwards to my full backs, or

simply to dribble around my opponents. Just the act of dribbling the ball requires skill;

therefore, a slow-witted person would find it impossible to perform such a task.Another example of intelligence is the ingenuity demonstrated by the receiver and his

teammates when they successfully complete a pass. After all, it requires a certain degree of

creativity and strategy to outmaneuver the other teams defenses, thus proving that football

players must be intelligent or else they would not be able to work together to score a

touchdown.

How then can this stereotype still be considered true? Perhaps what looks stupid in the

eyes of others is the athlete pushing him- or herself to the limit without regard to injury. In

the mind of an athlete, however, this act of pushing oneself to the limit and beyond is what

allows an athlete to improve, mature, and excel.

Semicolons

Students often want to know the proper use of the semicolon. Benfers essayillustrates the two accepted uses of this peculiar piece of punctuation: 1) A semi-colon can join independent clauses, and 2) a semicolon can separate items in aseries when comas are employed within those items.

Can you differentiate between the two examples in Benfers essay?

Ponder for a moment how the idea that athletes are stupid may have

evolved. Perhaps someone attended a contact sport such as football

and saw an injury occur during the game. Maybe the viewer discussed

the game with a friend and came to the conclusion that only someone stupid

would play football.

The main drivingforce behind myreturn to soccerwas the thrill ofcompetition.

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The Art of Lyingby Salena Mrozinski

In most cases, lying should be considered an art. First of all, in order to lieyou must be able to think very quickly so that you dont get yourself

caught up in the middle of the lie. Second, you must not have a guilty

conscience, because if you do it will be difficult to stick to your lie. Next, you

must able to think of a good lie which people will believe. Some lies are very

dull, while others are extremely well-fabricated. Last, you must be able to keep

your lie snowballing. In other words, you must be able to keep your lie flowing

in a smooth rhythm. Youll be considered a great liar if you keep these guide-

lines in mind.

One time I found myself in a situation in which all I could do was lie. The only reasonI lied was so I wouldnt hurt Adams feelings. Allow me to explain: One afternoon after

school, a guy named Adam asked me out on a date. I really wasnt interested in Adam, so I

quickly came up with a plan of action. Instead of telling him the truth, I lied about having a

boyfriend named Tylor. I didnt want to tell Adam how I really felt because I did not want

to hurt him.

When I told Adam about this so-called boyfriend of mine, he didnt believe me. Thats

when I made a complete identity for this imaginary guy. I told Adam that I was dating a guy

named Tylor Anderson. To make the lie seem even truer, I added an address and a telephone

number to Tylors false existence. I kept making the one little lie get bigger and bigger.

Finally, Adam did believe my lie. Little did he know, I wasnt dating this imaginary guy

named Tylor Anderson.

After about a week of lying to Adam, I learned that I shouldnt have lied to someone

who really liked me for who I was. I realized that there arent too many people out there whotreat others in a civilized and polite manner. I understood that Adam did like me for who I

really was, and thats when my conscience started itching at me. Soon after this guilt trip, I

apologized to Adam. I told the truth, and he understood all of it. He accepted my apology,

and ever since then we have been great friends. Even to this day, we both laugh when the

name Tylor Anderson is brought up. I was really happy that Adam forgave me for my

dishonesty and stupidity.

In conclusion, you can see how much skill I put into my lie; however, I failed because

my conscience got the best of me. In order for one to tell a great lie, everything must flow like

a stream.

Connections: Making Transitions

Notice the way each of Mrozinskis paragraphs begin. The phrase, In most cases, con-nects us with the title, The Art of Lying, and the rest of the essay, leading us to expect thatwe are going to receive an example of the art of lying. The second paragraph starts withthe phrase, One time, which indicates we will learn of a specific example of the art oflying. The third paragraph starts with When I, which provides a time shift. The fourthparagraph begins with After about a week, which provides another time shift. And the lastparagraph announces In conclusion, which signifies both a time shift and a movementaway from the narrative to a discussion of ideas.

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My Greatest Football Memory

by Robert Sawicki

On a chilly Friday evening on the seventeenth of November, the numberone seeded East Stroudsburg Cavaliers were scheduled to play in the

District Final game against their rivals, the fourth-seeded Stroudsburg

Mountaineers, for the District Title. As I entered Memorial Stadium, I saw an

abundance of news crews, fans, and families anticipating the start of the ball

game. Walking through the hallway I heard the bands from both schools tuning

their instruments amid the hum of excitement from the people around me. In

the midst of all t