An Outline of

Response Abilities Pathways

Some Key Concepts

Young people depend on adults for emotional security.

Pain and the Brain

Experiences that trigger stress and trauma cause pain to register in the anterior cingulate cortex in the brain

(Anglia; Dowman)

Fighting Pain With Pain

Most traditional approaches to discipline centre around the use of punishment.

emotion

emotion

reaction

reaction

Tit for Tat Emotional Reaction (ER) Cycles2005 Circle of Courage

Young person reactsWith PAIN-BASED

BEHAVIOUR

Adult reactsWith PAIN-BASED

DISCIPLINE

We Need an Alternative Approach

‘…….look beyond my faults to find my needs’Lyric by Joyce Reba Rambo

The Circle of Courage

Mastery

Generosity

Independence Belonging

Circle of Courage Resilience Research

Self-Worth Research

BelongingOpportunities to establish trusting connections

MasteryOpportunities to solve problems and meet goals

IndependenceOpportunities to develop self-control and responsibility

GenerosityOpportunities to show respect and concern

AttachmentMotivation to affiliate and form social bonds

AchievementMotivation to work hard and attain excellence

AutonomyMotivation to manage self and exert influence

AltruismMotivation to help and be of service to others

SignificanceThe individual believes, “I am important”

CompetenceThe individual believes, “I can solve problems”

PowerThe individual believes, “I set my life pathway”

VirtueThe individual believes, “My life has purpose”

Circle of Courage - Research Foundations

Disconnected Kids

High Risk Behaviours of Young People With Weak Bonds to Adults

The First Stage of RAP - Connecting

The human brain has programs that motivate us to connect to others.

Young people connect to adults and peers who meet their needs.

Trust

Respect

Understanding

Empowerment

The Private Logic of Adult Wary Kids – Barriers to Connection

FIGHT – HURT OR BE HURT

Threat display: I am dangerousPower display: I am the bossPay back: I’ll make them suffer

FLIGHT: HIDE OR BE HURT

Isolate: Shut out peopleRetreat: Shut out the painEscape: I can’t take any more

FOOL: OUTSMART THEM

Deceiving: Charm and disarmDiversion: Act dumb and crazyMind games: Insult and provoke

FOLLOW: BAND TOGETHER

Peer power: Follow friendsAlpha Power: Follow the leaderContagion: Follow the crowd

Bidding To Connect

We need to recognise when kids make bids to connect with us.

The Second Stage of RAP - Clear Thinking

From Risk to Resilience

Challenge Logic Emotions Actions Results

Challenge What event triggered the stress?

Logic What thoughts came to mind?

Emotions What feelings triggered action?

Actions What coping strategy was used?

Results What consequences followed?

BAMMS Thinking Errors

BlamingOthers always try to start fights with me.

I’m worthless and don’t deserve to live.

Assuming the WorstYou can’t trust anybody – they always lie to you.

No matter how hard I try, I always fail.

Minimising and MislabelingEveryone does it so what’s the big deal?

So I slapped her around – she’s just a ho!

Self-centredIf I see something I like, it’s mine.

Why should I care? I take care of myself.

Rescripting is a Key

Scripts are terms or phrases designed to influence thinking. Done well, they have the power to alter private logic.

A Sample Belonging Script

It’s great to have you here.

A Sample Mastery Script

A great kid like you – I know you’re going to be able to handle it.

A Sample Independence Script

Seems to me you’re a person who likes to think for themselves.

A Sample Generosity Script

Thank you for helping out.

The Third Stage of RAP - Restoring With the Circle of Courage

BelongingtrustfriendlyWarmgregariousaccepting

Alienationguardedwithdrawnunattachedlonelyrejected

Belonging/Attachmenta.b.

Masteryachievementfocusedcreativepersistentorganised

Incompetenceinadequacyunmotivatedconfuseddefeatistcheat

Mastery/Achievementa.b.

Independenceresponsibleconfidentself-disciplinedleaderassertive

Irresponsibilityunreliablehelplessnessundisciplinedeasily misledrebellious

Independence/Autonomya.b.

Generosityrespectfulsharingkindempathicsupportive

Selfishnessselfishvengefulexploitativeself-centredindifferent

Generosity/Altruisma.b.

STRENGTHS PROBLEMS RESTORATIVE GOALS

Making Caring Fashionable