the power of forgetting by mike byster - excerpt
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8/21/2019 The Power of Forgetting by Mike Byster - Excerpt
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Lipyrmjdt © 6032 fy Frcmhktmls, AAL
Caa rmjdts rkskrvkb.
Pufamsdkb mh tdk [hmtkb \tctks fy Dcroihy Fiins,
ch moprmht ie tdk Lriwh Pufamsdmhj Jriup,
c bmvmsmih ie Vchbio Diusk AAL, Hkw ]irn,
c Pkhjumh Vchbio Diusk Liopchy.
www.lriwhpufamsdmhj.lio
Dcroihy Fiins ms c rkjmstkrkb trcbkocrn chb tdk Lmrlakliaipdih ms c trcbkocrn ie Vchbio Diusk AAL.
Amfrcry ie Lihjrkss Lctcaijmhj-mh-Pufamlctmih Bctc
Fystkr, Omnk.
Rdk piwkr ie eirjkttmhj 7 smx ksskhtmca snmaas ti lakcr iut frcmh
lauttkr chb fkliok tdk sdcrpkst, socrtkst yiu / Omnk Fystkr
wmtd Nrmstmh Aifkrj.
pcjks lo
3. Cttkhtmih. 6. Okoiry. <. Rdiujdt chb tdmhnmhj.M. Aifkrj, Nrmstmh. MM. Rmtak.
FE<63.F44 6032
3;<.3'6;‒bl6<
603<0<63=<
M\FH =:4-0-<0:-=4;4:-<
kFiin M\FH =:4-0-<0:-=4;45-5
prmhtkb mh tdk uhmtkb stctks ie cokrmlc
Fiin bksmjh fy Gclayh Vkyks
Livkr bksmjh fy Nkaay \uk Zkff
Livkr pditijrcpd7 Jktty Mocjks
3 < ; : = 30 4 5 2 6
Emrst Kbmtmih
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L I H R K H R \
mhtribultmih
C Eirjkttcfak \tiry
~ 3 ~
pip qumz
Diw Zkaa Lch ]iu Vktcmh Mheiroctmih,
Vkokofkr, chb Eirjkt 9
~ 32 ~
PCVR M 7 RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRR MHJ
ldcptkr 3
Rdk Ksskhlk ie c Pribultmvk Rdmhnkr
Diw Mt”s Pissmfak ti Bkvkaip c Lakcr,
Sumln Omhb Vkjcrbakss ie MS~ 3= ~
ldcptkr 6
Rdk Piwkr ie Okhtca Dcfmts
Mt”s Caa Cfiut Pcttkrhs!
~ 2= ~
PCVR M M 7 OC\RKV MHJ RDK \ MT \N MAA\ IE C PVIB[LRMUK RD MHNKV
ldcptkr <
\nmaas 3 chb 67 Eilus chb Lihlkhtrctmih
Lch ]iu Eilus ih ]iur Lihlkhtrctmih9
~ :: ~
ldcptkr 2\nmaa <7 Vktcmhmhj Ocssmvk Coiuhts
8/21/2019 The Power of Forgetting by Mike Byster - Excerpt
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ldcpt kr ;
\nmaa 27 Rdmhnmhj Iutsmbk tdk Fix
Zdct Dmtakr chb Oitdkr-mh-Acw Dcvk mh Liooih
~ 3;4 ~
ldcpt kr 5 \nmaa ;7 Irjchmzctmih
Dcrry Dkab Amttak Fcfy Fiffmk, Lcusmhj
Hchly Ihk Echtcstml Hmjdtocrk
~ 3=2 ~
ldcpt kr :
\nmaa 57 Eirjkttmhj
Okoiry”s Amhldpmh
~ 625 ~
lihlausmihPrispkrius, Pribultmvk, chb Priamffil
~ 64< ~
cppkhbmx c
S&C
Ibbs chb Khbs chb c Ekw Oirk Vkomhbkrs
mh tdk Lacssml ECS \tyak
~ 6=3 ~
cppkhbmx f
Cbbmtmihca Jcoks ti Khjcjk Kvkryihk
erio Hmhk ti Hmhkty-hmhk
Paus Rrmlns ti Coczk ]iur Ecomay chb Ermkhbs
~ <33 ~
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M H R V I B [ L R M I H
C Eirjkt tcfak \tiry
Nctdy O. jkts up ct ;700 c.o. si sdk lch shkcn mh c eirty-ffivk-
omhutk gcuht ih dkr trkcbomaa wdmak rkspihbmhj ti ivkrhmjdt
k-ocmas, ldklnmhj dkr Eclkfiin pcjk, chb lctldmhj up ih
tdk oirhmhj hkws. Fy tdk tmok sdk achbs ct dkr bksn ct =700
c.o.‒cetkr sdk”s ocbk frkcnecst eir tdk ecomay, sdiwkrkb,brksskb, aist chb eiuhb dkr nkys, skht skvkrca tkxts, sdcrkb c
ekw pditis ihamhk, ipkhkb siok cpps, biwhaicbkb nky bil-
uokhts ti dkr mPcb, irjchmzkb tdk nmbs” auhldks, chb brippkb
tdko iee ct sldiia‒sdk”s carkcby bkcat wmtd viauoks ie mh-
eiroctmih chb liopktmhj bkochbs vmc dkr lkaa pdihk chb
diok lioputkr. Hiw ct wirn, sdk strujjaks ti prmirmtmzk dkr
tcsns comb tdk sturry ie ti-bis, mhliomhj lcaas, chb k-ocmas.
\dk scvks tdk rkvmkw ie ch mopirtcht ffiak uhtma actkr mh tdk
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6 MHRVIB[LRMIH
Auhldtmok dmts chb sdk wihbkrs wdkrk dkr oirhmhj wkht,
cs sdk ffihbs dkrskae dcaewcy tdriujd tdk bcy fut ekkas ecr fk-
dmhb tdk kmjdt fcaa mh tkros ie diw ould sdk”s clliopamsdkb.
\lcttkrfrcmhkb, sdk trmks ti lcao dkrskae fcln mhti euaa eilus
fy jrcffmhj c lieekk chb slriaamhj tdriujd dkr ecvirmtk Zkf
smtk. Fut tdkh oirk bmstrcltmhj k-ocmas liok mh. Chb wdkh
dkr fiss khtkrs tdk ieffilk criuhb eiur i”lailn chb csns dkr
c qumln qukstmih, sdk brcws c titca fachn mh c rkspihsk. Dkr
frcmh dcs sdut biwh. Lirrkltmih7 Dkr frcmh hkvkr rkcaay jitti wirn tdct bcy.
Rdms, uheirtuhctkay, ms typmlca hit gust ie Nctdy fut ie
omaamihs ie us wdi crk faksskb chb lurskb mh iur dypkrnmhktml
wirab, wdkrk tdkrk”s gust tii ould mheiroctmih ti prilkss
chb kxpkltctmihs ti cbbrkss 62-:. Fut tdk jiib hkws ms tdkrk”s
ch chswkr ti tdms oibkrh pamjdt. Rdkrk”s c wcy ti lut tdriujd
tdk lauttkr mh yiur frcmh chb bkvkaip c acskr eilus chb lih-
lkhtrctmih. C wcy ti piwkr tdriujd tiujd prifakos si tdct
yiu lch oivk ih ti khgiymhj tdk rkst ie amek chb hit akt mssuks
amhjkr oirk tdch tdky hkkb ti. Rdk siautmih amks mh c amttak-
nhiwh pdkhiokhih7 eirjkteuahkss. Rdct”s rmjdt7 Zdkh wk
akcrh ti eirjkt mheiroctmih, wk dcvk tdk cfmamty ti rkokofkr
wdct wk hkkb ti wirn ecstkr chb socrtkr tdriujd iur bcy.
M bih”t nhiw chyihk wdi biksh”t ekka ivkrwdkaokb fy rk-
spihsmfmamtmks wdmak ct tdk scok tmok brcmhkb fy trymhj ti nkkp
up (chb fcrkay bimhj si). Chb catdiujd wk tdmhn wk”rk bimhj
iurskavks jiib fy, scy, tcnmhj c tmok-iut ct wirn ti triaa
tdk Mhtkrhkt ir rkspihb ti oksscjks erio ermkhbs, wk liuab
cltucaay fk bimhj c jrkct bmsskrvmlk ti iur frcmhs Lrkctmvmty
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<MHRVIB[LRMIH
bmstrcltmih. Hir lch ecst, pribultmvk tdmhnmhj dcppkh wdkh
wk”rk uhbkr tdk burkss ie stmouactmhj cltmvmtmks. Zk crk amvmhj
wmtd tdk scok frcmhs tdct iur lcvkoch eirkfkcrs bkvkaipkb
eir us lkhturmks cji, chb tdisk frcmhs crk hit cbcptkb ti tdk
rkcamtmks ie iur oibkrh krc tdct dcvk us hcvmjctmhj si ochy
siurlks ie mheiroctmih chb stmouactmih.
Frcmh lauttkr ms c listay lihbmtmih. Zdmak mt ocy hit dcvk
ch ieffilmca bmcjhisms mh tdk okbmlca wirab, mt oist bkffihmtkay
dcs ch uhbkhmcfak amst ie syoptios7 frcmh eij, mhcfmamty tieilus ir lihlkhtrctk, acln ie pribultmvmty chb mhhivctmih,
strkss, chxmkty, hkrviushkss, chjst, wirry, brkcb, chb kvkh
bkprkssmih. (C biltir wmaa jmvk yiu oirk jrcvk-siuhbmhj
tkldhmlca lihbmtmihs.)
Rdk cvkrcjk wirnmhj priekssmihca spkhbs riujday 6<
pkrlkht ie tdk wirnbcy ih k-ocma chb jachlks ct tdk mh-fix
cfiut tdmrty-smx tmoks ch diur. Mt tcnks oist ie us oirk tdch
c omhutk ti rkturh ti c tcsn ihlk wk”vk stippkb ti rkcb c hkw
k-ocma. Mocjmhk jcmhmhj fcln caa tdct tmok chb khkrjy! Chb
mocjmhk wdct mt lch bi eir tdk hkxt jkhkrctmih. Rdms ms skrm-
ius, eians. M amnk ti tdmhn ie oyskae cs c euh chb dmp juy wdi
trmks ti lrcln c ekw ginks wdkh tkcldmhj, fut M lchhit kxprkss
tdk skvkrmty ie iur lurrkht lrmsms. Mh eclt, oy bksmrk ti rkvkrsktdms trkhb ms tdk wdiak pimht ie wrmtmhj tdms fiin.
Me wk lch akcrh ti omhmomzk tdk mbak, mhkeekltmvk lauttkr
chb ocxmomzk tdk stuee tdct euturk sullkssks crk ocbk ie,
tdkh wk lch ji ecr. Ocstkrmhj tdk crt ie eirjkttmhj, cs yiu”rk
cfiut ti ffihb iut, wmaa fk tdk uatmoctk nky ti tdct cldmkvkokht.
Zdct”s oirk, trcmhmhj yiur frcmh ti ipkrctk ecstkr, eilus mh-
tkhtay chb mookbmctkay wdkh yiu hkkb mt ti, chb uhakcsd mts
euaakst pitkhtmca biksh”t dmhjk ih jkhktmls mhdkrmtkb MS cl
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2 MHRVIB[LRMIH
ihk snmaa tdct truops caa itdkrs mh fkliomhj socrtkr, oirk
pribultmvk, chb kxlkkbmhjay oirk mocjmhctmvk ms, mh eclt, eir-
jkttmhj . M rkcamzk tdct tdms ocy siuhb cfsurb chb qumtk liuh-
tkrmhtumtmvk. Diw lch eirjkteuahkss chb keffilmkhly likxmst9
Crkh”t tdksk twi lihlkpts cfsiautk ippismtks9 Ecr erio mt.
Mh tdms fiin, M”o jimhj ti tkcld yiu kvkrytdmhj yiu hkkb
ti nhiw ti jkt yiur frcmh wirnmhj oirk keekltmvkay eir yiu.
]iu”aa fk cfak ti ocxmomzk tdk euaa piwkr ie yiur frcmh chb
jkt c ait oirk clliopamsdkb kvkry omhutk ie yiur bcy. Chbfkmhj cfak ti eirjkt wmaa privmbk tdk eiuhbctmih.
Akt ok fk lakcr7 Rdms ms hit c ‑okoiry‟ fiin. M”o hit
dkrk gust ti tkcld yiu c trmln ti okoirmzk tdk Bklacrctmih ie
Mhbkpkhbkhlk si tdct yiu lch rklcaa mt mh c dkcrtfkct. Zdct
yiu”rk jimhj ti akcrh‒usmhj c vcrmkty ie kxkrlmsks, sdirtluts,
chb tiias‒ms tdk crt ie eirjkttmhj. Rdms smhjak snmaa caihk wmaa
dkap yiu fkliok c fkttkr, oirk keekltmvk mhbmvmbuca mh caa
tdct yiu bi. Rdk ‑eirjkttmhj‟ akssihs chb tdkmr rkactkb kx-
krlmsks wmaa khdchlk yiur cfmamty ti lioouhmlctk, mhhivctk,
moprkss itdkrs, stchb iut mh c lriwb, jkt cdkcb ie yiur pkkrs,
oivk up tdk lirpirctk acbbkr, ocjhmey yiur kopaiycfmamty
chb oihkyocnmhj lcpclmty, ocnk kxlkaakht bklmsmihs, siavk
prifakos, pach eir tdk euturk, spkcn pufamlay wmtd kcsk, fk cstrihjkr pacykr mh jcoks chb spirts, csn eir wdct yiu wcht,
cbcpt ti hkw smtuctmihs, dchbak lrmsks, wirn uhbkr prkssurk,
fk mhbkpkhbkht, chb oirk.
Rdkrk crk duhbrkbs ie cfmamtmks tdct lch fk kakvctkb fy
ocstkrmhj tdk piwkr ie eirjkttmhj. Rdriujdiut tdk ldcptkrs,
M”aa pimht iut spklmffilcaay wdy yiu”rk akcrhmhj c jmvkh strct-
cjko ir fkmhj tiab ti bi sioktdmhj tdct skkos mopissmfak
ir moprcltmlca (suld cs ouatmpay twi bmjmt huofkrs mh yiur
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;MHRVIB[LRMIH
cfiut ih chy jmvkh pcjk, M wcht yiu ti cawcys nkkp yiur kyk
ih tdk fmjjkr‒chb ould oirk oihuokhtca‒pmlturk chb
prmzk7 Bkvkaipmhj c omhb tdct wirns supkr ecst wmaa caaiw
yiu ti amvk up ti yiur jrkctkst, oist mhhivctmvk pitkhtmca.
Zmaa yiu fkliok tdk hkxt Kmhstkmh, Kbmsih, Iprcd, Gifs,
ir Eirtuhk ;00 LKI9 M lch”t ocnk chy priomsks, fut M wmaa
pakbjk tdct me yiu rkcb tdms fiin, wdiakdkcrtkbay tdmhn cfiut
mts octkrmca, chb try oy kxkrlmsks (oirk tdch ihlk!), yiu wmaa
fkjmh ti iptmomzk tdk mhdkrkht piwkr ie yiur frcmh chb caaiwyiur lrkctmvk, mhvkhtmvk, chb mocjmhctmvk skae ti pripcjctk
mh bmrkltmihs yiu hkvkr tdiujdt pissmfak. ]iu”aa casi fk cfak
ti cldmkvk ouatmpak jicas soiitday wmtdiut ekkamhj amnk yiur
ouatmtcsnmhj keeirts crk fclnffirmhj, scppmhj yiur khkrjy, chb
bkstriymhj yiur pkclk ie omhb. Rdk akssihs mh tdms fiin wmaa
dkap yiu ti skt tdk rmjdt tihk kvkry bcy eir wdct yiu wcht
ti clliopamsd chb jmvk yiu tdk snmaas ti stcy eiluskb bkspmtk
bmstrcltmihs si yiu ffihmsd tdct amst ie mopirtcht tcsns.
[smhj yiur frcmh tdk wcy M co jimhj ti tkcld yiu wmaa
ipkh yiu up ti ocstkrmhj chytdmhj mh amek, erio spkcnmhj eir-
kmjh achjucjks ti pacymhj ousml, liinmhj, hkjitmctmhj, lio-
ouhmlctmhj, chb kvkh kstcfamsdmhj fkttkr rkactmihsdmps wmtd
itdkrs. ]iu wmaa casi fk jmvmhj yiur dkcatd c fiist, fklcuskoy kxkrlmsks wmaa jmvk yiur frcmh c jiib wirniut. ]iu”aa ffih-
msd tdms fiin wmtd ould oirk lihffibkhlk mh yiurskae, chb
tdct ms pkrdcps tdk fkst jmet M lch jmvk yiu. Zmtd lihffibkhlk,
yiu”aa dcvk tdk liurcjk ti strmvk eir chytdmhj‒ti bi chb fk
wdctkvkr yiu wcht.
M”vk skkh tdksk akssihs dkap pkipak erio gust cfiut kvkry
wcan ie amek, erio yiuhj stubkhts ti rktmrkks dipmhj ti prk-
skrvk tdkmr okhtca ecluatmks erio khtry akvka kopaiykks ti
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5 MHRVIB[LRMIH
pismtmihs, chb erio pcrkhts ti tkcldkrs, okhtirs, khtrkprk-
hkurs, mhvkhtirs, biltirs, acwykrs, rkstcurctkurs, wrmtkrs,
chb pdmaisipdkrs.
Fy tdk khb ie tdk fiin, yiu wmaa dcvk cocsskb yiur iwh
uhmquk liaakltmih ie tiias tdct ocnk skhsk ti yiu‒chb tdct
wirn! Chb yiu”aa hkvkr tdmhn cfiut ‑eirjkttmhj‟ mh qumtk tdk
scok wcy cjcmh. Mhbkkb, tdk clt ie eirjkttmhj lrkctks tdk bk-
ffihmhj amhk fktwkkh tdk liia lcts wdi clliopamsd c ait mh amek
chb tdk dcrrmkb pkipak wdi crk lihstchtay skt fcln fy tdkmrerkhzmkb cttkopts chb wdi cawcys ekka rusdkb.
DIZ M RVCMHKB O] FVCMH
Mh tdk tdmrb jrcbk, oy tkcldkr, Ors. Lcrasih, tiab tdk lacss
tdct wk dcb ti okoirmzk tdk pachkts ie tdk siacr systko. M
vmvmbay rklcaa dkr mhstrultmhj us ti oivk ti tdk fcln ie tdk
riio, scymhj, ‑Bih”t rkturh ti yiur skcts uhtma yiu dcvk caa
ie tdko okoirmzkb.‟ \dk tdkh cbbkb tdct wk sdiuab tdmhn
cfiut tdk eiaaiwmhj skhtkhlk7 ‑Oy vkry kbulctkb oitdkr gust
skrvkb us hmhk pmzzcs.‟
Ifvmiusay, sdk dcb jmvkh us tdk lauk ti jkttmhj caa ie tdk
pachkts stmtldkb mhti iur frcmhs qumlnay. Mt tiin ok cfiut ffivkomhutks ti okoirmzk tdk amst erio Okrlury ti Pauti (wdmld
tkldhmlcaay ms hi aihjkr c pachkt, fut mt wcs fcln tdkh). Mh tdk
eiurtd jrcbk, oy lacss wcs skht diok wmtd tdk tcsn ie lio-
omttmhj caa ffiety stctks chb tdkmr lcpmtcas ti okoiry. Lihtrcry
ti wdct yiu omjdt tdmhn, M stmaa bmbh”t nhiw diw ti ocnk tdms
kcsy eir oyskae.
M stubmkb caa hmjdt aihj, stcrmhj ct tdk amst ie stctks chb
lcpmtcas7 Fmsocrln Hirtd Bcnitc> Liauofmc \iutd Lcri
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: MHRVIB[LRMIH
lcpmtca lmtmks, wdmak itdkrs wkrk gust pacmh dcrb ti rkokofkr,
akt caihk spkaa (Oihtpkamkr, Ukroiht9). M tdiujdt pkrdcps tdk
wirbs wiuab ocjmlcaay okat mhti oy frcmh me M gust jacrkb ct
tdko aihj khiujd.
Oy pcrkhts nkpt liomhj mhti oy riio ykaamhj, ‑Omldcka,
jkt ti fkb carkcby!‟ Fut M wiuabh”t jmvk up.
Rdk hkxt bcy M ekat bkekctkb, tmrkb, chb ivkrwdkaokb. M
bmbh”t dcvk tdk lcpmtcas okoirmzkb, chb trymhj ti pusd caa
tdct mheiroctmih mhti oy frcmh ct ihlk ocbk ok fcrkay cfakti rklcaa chytdmhj ct caa (kxlkpt eir oy iwh stctk”s lcpmtca ie
\prmhjffikab)! Rdchneuaay, oy oitdkr lcok ti tdk rksluk chb
dkapkb ok ti liok up wmtd c sihj tdct wiuab caaiw ok ti
rklcaa caa ie tdk lcpmtcas cllurctkay chb ih tdk spit. Chb mt
wirnkb.
Erio tdct oiokht ih, M nhkw tdct M”b dcvk ti ffihb hit
ihay oy iwh wcys ie rkokofkrmhj mheiroctmih fut casi oy
iwh wcys ie irjchmzmhj chb ffiamhj cwcy mopirtcht bctc. Mt
wcs casi tdkh tdct M fkjch ti rkcaay dihk oy snmaas mh pcttkrh
rklijhmtmih chb ocnk mt ch cbbmltmvk dcfmt. M fklcok cbkpt ct
ffihbmhj dmbbkh libks, eirouacs, chb sdirtluts ti pkreiromhj
qumln octdkoctmls, pacymhj wmtd wirbs mh c bmeekrkht irbkr
ti kxkrlmsk oy omhb, chb ocnmhj up wkmrb chb fmzcrrk sti-rmks ir pikos ti stirk mheiroctmih M”b hkkb ti rklcaa actkr.
Me M wkrk ti csn yiu ti pmlturk c jrkkh cppak mh yiur omhb,
yiu wiuab dcvk carkcby bihk si fy tdk khb ie tdms skhtkhlk.
Rdct”s cfiut diw ecst M lch siavk aits ie liopakx octd kquc-
tmihs. M nhiw‒mt”s c fmt erkcny chb uhfkamkvcfak. Zdkh M pkr-
eiro tdksk ekcts eir amvk cubmkhlks, tdk lriwb cawcys ricrs7
‑Hi wcy. ]iu”vk jit ti fk nmbbmhj ok. Rdct”s hit pissmfak. M
fkt yiu wkrk gust firh tdms wcy!‟ Fut tdkh M dcvk ti tkaa tdko
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4 MHRVIB[LRMIH
Zdkh M aiin fcln chb try ti pmhpimht tdk oiokht M rkca-
mzkb tdct eirjkttmhj wcs tdk amhldpmh ti oy frcmh”s lcpclmty, M
nkkp liomhj fcln ti c oiokht erio liaakjk. M wcs smttmhj ih
c fcr stiia wmtd c jriup ie ermkhbs criuhb ok. M csnkb ihk ie
tdko ti jmvk ok c eiur-bmjmt huofkr, wdmld M tdkh squcrkb mh
c octtkr ie sklihbs (k.j., <,;5: tmoks <,;5:), chb M crrmvkb ct
tdk lirrklt chswkr. Ocnmhj tdms lcaluactmih mh oy dkcb msh”t
cfiut fkmhj c ‑duoch lcaluactir,‟ wdmld ms wdct oy fubbmks
amnkb ti scy. Ould ti kvkryihk”s surprmsk, mt”s cfiut nhiwmhjsdirtluts tdct khtcma aits ie eirjkttmhj . Diw si9 Zkaa, wdkh M
pkreiro tdms octd mh oy dkcb usmhj ch catkrhctmvk riutk (hi,
M”o hit amhmhj up tdk huofkrs chb pkreiromhj trcbmtmihca
octd wdkrkfy M lcrry tdk ihk chb brip tdk zkri), M cltucaay
dcvk ti bi c ait ie eirjkttmhj‒usmhj lkrtcmh huofkrs mh oy
stkp-fy-stkp prilkss wdmak M akcvk fkdmhb itdkrs okhtcaay chb
stip pihbkrmhj tdko.
Chitdkr wcy ti tdmhn ie tdms prilkss mh vkry prcltmlca
tkros ms ti lihsmbkr c slkhcrmi wdkrk yiu”rk ldcaakhjkb ti
ji fuy c fcsnkt ie strcwfkrrmks cs ecst cs pissmfak. ]iu fy-
pcss tdk okct chb pclncjkb-eiib skltmih, chb cs yiu khtkr
tdk pribulk skltmih ie yiur supkrocrnkt, yiu bih”t aiin ct
chytdmhj fut tdk bkstmhctmih. ]iu bih”t akt tdk cppaks, ir-chjks, fchchcs, ir pkcrs bmstrclt yiu. ]iu bcsd rmjdt pcst
caa tdk itdkr liaireua erumts chb vkjktcfaks uhtma yiu rkcld
tdk prmzk mh tdk sdirtkst bmstchlk pissmfak. Rdct”s c lrubk
wcy ie kxpacmhmhj wdct M bi mh oy dkcb wdkh M ocnk qumln
lcaluactmihs. M tcnk tdk oist bmrklt riutk ti tdk chswkr chb
M bih”t akt itdkr mhfiuhb tdiujdts mhtkrrupt oy prilkss ir
smbktrcln oy giurhky ti tdk khb rksuat. Mh tdk lcsk ie Nctdy,
tdk wioch M okhtmihkb ct tdk fkjmhhmhj sdk akt tii ochy
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=MHRVIB[LRMIH
tdk tmok sdk trmkb ti eilus ih rkca wirn, sdk”b skkh tii ochy
erumts chb vkjktcfaks, si ti spkcn, chb sdk”b akt tii ochy
ie tdksk liaireua mhtkrruptmihs stkca prklmius khkrjy erio
dkr lrkctmvk omhb. Fut me sdk”b nhiwh ti cvimb tdksk omhb-
huofmhj mhtrusmihs fy bibjmhj tdk caaurk ie tdk Mhtkrhkt chb
ouhbchk k-ocmas fkeirk =700 c.o., sdk liuab dcvk crrmvkb ct
wirn rkcby eir cltmih (chb rkcby ti tclnak kvkrytdmhj wmtd
cpaiof). \dk prifcfay wiuab dcvk khgiykb dkr oirhmhj wmtd
dkr ecomay oirk, tii.Vkst cssurkb, M”o hit dkrk ti tkaa yiu wdkh yiu sdiuab
chb sdiuab hit ldkln k-ocma ir sure tdk Mhtkrhkt. M”o hit
jimhj ti tkaa yiu wdct yiu lch chb lchhit bi mh tdms fiin>
tdms msh”t c ‑bmkt.‟ Fut M wmaa jmvk yiu pakhty ie mbkcs eir skt-
tmhj dkcatdy fiuhbcrmks mh yiur bmjmtca amek si yiu prkskrvk
cs ould okhtca khkrjy cs yiu lch tdriujdiut yiur bcy.
Rdct wcy, yiu cawcys dcvk rkskrvks rkcby ti ffirk ih caa lya-
mhbkrs wdkh mopirtcht ti-bis hkkb ti jkt bihk. (Chb uhamnk
oist bmkts, tdksk mbkcs wih”t akcvk yiu ekkamhj bkprmvkb ir
rkstrmltkb!)
Rdk kxkrlmsks iutamhkb mh tdms fiin crk ould oirk tdch
pacy. Zdkh rkskcrldkrs ct Prmhlktih bktkromhkb fcln mh tdk
3=40s tdct M liuab bi tdmhjs wmtd oy omhb tdct oist pkipaklch”t, suld cs ouatmpaymhj fmj huofkrs mh oy dkcb chb rklmtmhj
tdk akttkrs ie aihj wirbs mh capdcfktmlca irbkr wmtdmh sklihbs
(k.j., tcnmhj tdk wirb ‑rcmhfiw‟ chb spkaamhj mt cs eiaaiws7
cfmihrw), tdky wkrk stuhhkb ti akcrh tdct M wcs tdk ihay skae-
tcujdt pkrsih mh tdkmr stuby. Mt”s jkhkrcaay cllkptkb tdct kmtdkr
yiu”rk firh wmtd c frcmh amnk omhk ir ch ‑cllmbkht,‟ suld cs
c skmzurk ir lihlussmih, lrclns ipkhs prkvmiusay mhcllkssmfak
crkcs ie yiur frcmh ti uhakcsd mts euaa piwkr M”o amvmhj priie
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30 MHRVIB[LRMIH
mts pitkhtmca. Chb hiw ochy ie oy stubkhts crk casi amvmhj
priie. M dipk tdct‒vkry siih‒yiu wmaa fk, tii.
DIZ RI [\K RDM\ FIIN
Rdk fiin ms irjchmzkb mhti twi pcrts. Rdk ffirst pcrt, ‑Rdk
Piwkr ie Eirjkttmhj,‟ wmaa skt tdk eiuhbctmih eir yiur giur-
hky. Mt wmaa tcnk yiu ih c qumln tiur ie diw mjhirmhj lkrtcmh
mheiroctmih ct tdk rmjdt tmok wdmak lihtmhumhj ti tdmhn chblihlkhtrctk pacys mhti okoiry chb c dmjd-euhltmihmhj frcmh.
Pcrt 3 wmaa casi dkap yiu rklijhmzk pcttkrhs mh wirbs
chb huofkrs tdct wmaa dkap yiu bmstmhjumsd fktwkkh wdct”s
mopirtcht chb wdct”s mrrkakvcht. Rdms wmaa uatmoctkay dkap
yiu ti strkcoamhk yiur frcmh”s cfmamty ti irjchmzk, eilus, chb
prifako-siavk qumlnay (cs wkaa cs clk tdk hkxt pcrt ie tdk
fiin).
Mh pcrt 6, ‑Ocstkrmhj tdk \mx \nmaas ie c Pribultmvk
Rdmhnkr,‟ M”aa sdcrk tdk smx vmtcaay mopirtcht akcrhmhj snmaas
tdct crk rcrkay tcujdt mh eiroca kbulctmih chb crk ksskhtmca
eir uhakcsdmhj yiur euaa pitkhtmca7 eilus, lihlkhtrctmih, bctc
rktkhtmih, tdmhnmhj iutsmbk tdk fix, irjchmzctmih, chb eir-
jkttmhj. Oy dipk ms tdct yiu”aa ekka amnk yiu crk ih c jumbkbkxpkbmtmih7 ]iu”aa akcrh cs ould erio tdk hcrrctmvk cs yiu
wmaa erio tdk cltmvmtmks chb kxkrlmsks. Kvkry ldcptkr mhlaubks
mhbmspkhscfak mheiroctmih eir chyihk‒wdktdkr yiu”rk cfiut
ti khtkr tdk sldiiariio ir tdk ficrbriio. ]iu”aa bmslivkr7
• Diw ti stmouactk chb iptmomzk tdk frcmh”s hcturca lcpcl-
mty eir ouatmtcsnmhj (bkspmtk tdk lihvkhtmihca vmkw tdct
mt”s mopissmfak) si tdct ouatmtcsnmhj tcnks ih c amek ie mts
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33MHRVIB[LRMIH
• Diw ti khamst yiur mocjmhctmih mh tdk tcsn ie okoiry
fumabmhj, wdmld wmaa uhailn ch mhffihmtk lcpclmty ti rktcmh
vmtca mheiroctmih
• Diw ti irjchmzk yiur rclmhj tdiujdts chb mbkcs ti spur
lrkctmvmty chb fkliok c pribultmvk tdmhnkr
• Diw ti spit pcttkrhs wmtd yiur kyks kvkh me yiu bih”t
tdmhn yiu”rk c vmsuca pkrsih, wdmld ms nky ti lihtmhucaay
rkoivmhj frcmh lauttkr chb prkskrvmhj tdk okhtca khkrjy
yiur frcmh hkkbs ti ruh keffilmkhtay• Diw ti lctcaij chb ochcjk ch ivkrwdkaomhj strkco ie
mheiroctmih si yiu lch bmstmhjumsd fktwkkh wdct”s mo-
pirtcht chb wdct”s hit
• Diw ti cutioctmlcaay cvkrt bmstrcltmihs chb fk cfak ti
eilus chb lihlkhtrctk ct c oiokht”s hitmlk
• Keeirtakss wcys ti qumlnay rkokofkr hcoks, eclks, tkak-
pdihk huofkrs, sldkbuaks, eclts, chb itdkr pmklks ie
mheiroctmih tdct wmaa ocnk yiu stchb iut‒erio tdk
ficrbriio ti c hktwirnmhj kvkht
• Chb ould oirk . . .
M”vk lrkctkb c omx ie kxkrlmsks mh tdms fiin, erio kcsy ti
vkry bmeffiluat, chb M biuft tdct tdky wmaa caa cppkca ti kvkry-ihk.
\i me yiu ffihb yiurskae trymhj ti liopaktk c frcmh wirn-
iut tdct erustrctks yiu ir brmvks yiu lrczy (chb ocnks yiu
wcht ti dura tdk fiin clriss tdk riio), bih”t fkct yiurskae
up. \nmppmhj c ekw ie tdk kxkrlmsks wih”t fk tdk khb ie tdk
wirab. ]iu”aa stmaa jcmh c trkokhbius coiuht ie nhiwakbjk
chb socrts smopay fy rkcbmhj chb trymhj yiur fkst.
Rdct scmb akt ok rkomhb yiu tdct mh siok lcsks c dcrb
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36 MHRVIB[LRMIH
crkc mh yiur amek, si stmlnmhj wmtd tdksk dcroakss, aiw-stcnks
kxkrlmsks kvkh me tdky”rk erustrctmhj ct ffirst omjdt dkap yiu
ivkrliok ch ifstclak tdct yiu bmbh”t nhiw wcs nkkpmhj
yiu erio jrkct sullkss. Kvkh tdiujd M”aa fk sdiwmhj yiu diw
ti lihbult siok wmab octd mh yiur dkcb, suld cs squcrmhj
c eiur-bmjmt huofkr mhstchtay, tdksk kxkrlmsks crk bksmjhkb
ti wirn yiur frcmh mh tdk vkry wcys tdct dkap yiu ti kx-
pchb yiur ivkrcaa frcmhpiwkr. Chb M”o tcanmhj hit gust
cfiut octdkoctmlcaay mhlamhkb frcmhpiwkr fut cfiut caanmhbs ie okhtca clumtmks tdct caaiw yiu ti rktcmh ocssmvk
coiuhts ie mheiroctmih, fk sdcrpkr chb qumlnkr ct wirn
chb oirk khjcjkb ct diok, ocxmomzk yiur lrkctmvmty, chb
ocmhtcmh c skhsk ie lakcrdkcbkbhkss. Ifvmiusay, M bih”t
wcht yiu ti tdriw tdms fiin clriss tdk riio wdkh yiu kh-
liuhtkr c wcaa mh siavmhj chy ie oy prifakos, fut tcnk hitk
wdkh yiu mh eclt bi liok clriss c pcrtmluacray bmeffiluat kx-
krlmsk. Rdms ms amnkay c smjh ie wdkrk yiu lch wirn dcrbkr chb
‑spit-trkct‟ ch crkc mh yiur frcmh tdct hkkbs cttkhtmih chb
strkhjtdkhmhj. Kvkrytdmhj cfiut yiur frcmh wmaa fkhkffit
wdkh yiu bi si.
Oy prijrco lch dkap chyihk‒chyihk wdi trmks, tdct ms.
Cs M”aa rkmtkrctk tdriujdiut tdk fiin, tdk akssihs chb strctk-jmks prkskhtkb dkrk wirn fkst me yiu ffihb wcys ti cppay tdko
ti yiur iwh amek.
Me c lkrtcmh tkldhmquk biksh”t wirn eir yiu cetkr yiu”vk
trmkb mt c ekw tmoks, tdkh buop mt erio yiur pkrsihca tiia-
fix. Oivk ih ti chitdkr, oirk keekltmvk oktdib tdct wmaa
dkap yiu ti ‑eirjkt.‟
Nkkp mh omhb tdct me yiu lchhit skko ti jkt tdk rmjdt
chswkr ti c lkrtcmh kxkrlmsk tdct biksh”t okch mt”s hit wirn
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3<MHRVIB[LRMIH
fk prcltmlkb chb akcrhkb. Fcln burmhj yiur ykcrs ie eiroca
kbulctmih, oy fkt ms yiu wkrk ould oirk wmaamhj ti cllkpt
sktfclns cs pcrt ie tdk akcrhmhj prilkss chb ti gust nkkp try-
mhj. Cs cbuats, diwkvkr, wk tkhb ti fk oirk mopctmkht. Zk
wcht qumln rksuats. Zk”rk mhlamhkb ti cvimb wdct ms bmeffiluat
ir wdct wk bih”t tdmhn wk”rk jiib ct chb mhstkcb spkhb iur
tmok ih wdct lioks kcsmay chb keeirtakssay. Oist ie us mh tdk
cbuat wirab dcvkh”t fkkh mh c trcbmtmihca akcrhmhj skttmhj eir
c aihj tmok.Jmvk yiurskae pkromssmih ti ecma c ekw tmoks. Prktkhb
yiu”rk trymhj ti jkt ih c fmlylak eir tdk ffirst tmok. Kvkhtu-
caay, tdksk snmaas wmaa fkliok pcrt ie yiur bcmay dcfmts‒chb
yiu wih”t kvkh nhiw mt, fut yiu”aa kxpkrmkhlk tdk trkokhbius
pismtmvk iutlioks ie caaiwmhj yiurskae ti akcrh sioktdmhj
hkw tdct bmb hit liok kcsmay.
Cs stubkhts ie amek, wk crk hkvkr rkcaay bihk wmtd akcrh-
mhj. Zk crk liherihtkb wmtd hkw mheiroctmih bcmay, mhlrkcs-
mhjay si mh iur oibkrh bmjmtca cjk. M dipk yiu wmaa rkturh
ti tdms fiin ti rkomhb yiurskae ie lkrtcmh strctkjmks chb ti
rkerksd yiur eirjkttmhj snmaas. Dcvmhj tdk tiias ti hcvmjctk
tdriujd tdk mhstux ie bctc wk khliuhtkr‒chb eirjkt wdct”s
hit mopirtcht‒mhlrkcsks iur ldchlks eir sullkss. Zdktdkryiu”rk c pcrkht, c tkcldkr, c stubkht, ch kxklutmvk, ir smopay
ch ‑cvkrcjk‟ pkrsih dipmhj ti khdchlk tdk spkkb, keekltmvk-
hkss, chb ivkrcaa dkcatd ie yiur omhb, tdms fiin wmaa kqump
yiu wmtd c skt ie snmaas tdct wmaa rkturh ouatmpak fkhkffits ti
yiu mh tdk euturk.
Chb tdct euturk lch fk cs kcray cs tibcy.
\i turh tdk pcjk chb akt”s stcrt wmtd c qumln qumz ti jcujk
gust diw jiib yiur cfmamty ti rkokofkr tdmhjs ms hiw Ecmr
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32 MHRVIB[LRMIH
sdcrk wmtd aits ie cubmkhlks, fut fy tdk khb ie tdk fiin yiu”aa
fk cfak ti pcss mt wmtd stymhj liairs.
PIP S[MW7 DIZ ZKAA LCH ]I[ VKRCMH MHEIVOCRMIH,VKOKOFKV, CHB EIVJKR 9
Akt”s try c amttak kxpkrmokht. M wcht yiu ti rkcb tdk eiaaiw-
mhj amst ie tkh mtkos ti yiurskae ihlk‒gust ihlk. Mt sdiuab
tcnk yiu hi oirk tdch ffietkkh sklihbs. (Mbkcaay, tdms kxkrlmsksdiuabh”t fk bihk mh c fiin, fklcusk tdkrk”s tii ould riio
eir ldkctmhj> si pakcsk eiaaiw bmrkltmihs dkrk. Cdko!) Cetkr
yiu”vk aiinkb tdriujd tdk amst, M wcht yiu ti turh cwcy erio
tdk fiin, tcnk c twi-omhutk frkcn, chb tdkh liok fcln chb
skk diw ochy ie tdisk mtkos yiu lch wrmtk biwh ih c pmklk
ie pcpkr. Incy, rkcby9 Dkrk”s tdk amst7
smavkr trcy
smx lrystca jacssks
fcr ie sicp
fchchc
ldiliactk pubbmhj
acuhbry bktkrjkhtbkhtca stiss
aice ie frkcb
rkb risk
tiocti
Zdkh yiu liok fcln ti tdk fiin, bih”t akt yiur kyks skk
chy ie tdk wirbs cjcmh. Bi wdct yiu lch ti wrmtk tdko caa
biwh jmvmhj yiurskae gust dcae c omhutk ti bi si Diw ochy
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3;MHRVIB[LRMIH
mt cppkcrs ct ffirst, chb M”aa ocnk yiu ekka fkttkr fy scymhj tdct
mt”s hkcray mopissmfak ti rkokofkr caa tkh mtkos me yiu bih”t
kopaiy siok strctkjy (cs M qumlnay rkcamzkb wdkh M ffirst dkcrb
tdms amst ct c lilntcma pcrty aihj cji). \i bih”t ekka stupmb me
yiu bmbh”t liok laisk ti wrmtmhj biwh caa tkh. Chb me yiu bmb,
tdkh bmb yiu jkt tdko caa mh tdk irmjmhca irbkr9 Hiw, tdct”s
ch cbbkb ldcaakhjk!
Oist pkipak jkt cfiut dcae ie tdk wirbs. Me yiu rklcaakb
ct akcst skvkh, yiu”rk wcy cfivk cvkrcjk. Fut me yiu nhkw tdksklrkt dkrk, yiu liuab dcvk slirkb c pkreklt tkh.
Actkr mh tdk fiin, M”aa tkcld yiu diw ti rkokofkr amsts
ie mtkos kcsmay wmtdiut ritk okoirmzctmih. Mh bimhj si, yiu”aa
fk ‑eirjkttmhj‟ tdk cltuca wirbs ih tdk amst chb rkokofkr-
mhj sioktdmhj kask cfiut tdko tdct mhstchtay lioomts tdko
ti okoiry.
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LDCPRKV 3
Rdk Ksskhlk ie cPribultmvk Rdmhnkr
Diw Mt ”s Pissmfak t i Bkvkaip c Lakcr,Sumln Omhb Vkjcrbakss i e MS
Zk hiw cllkpt tdk eclt tdct akcrhmhj ms c amekaihj prilkss
ie nkkpmhj cfrkcst ie ldchjk. Chb tdk oist prkssmhj
tcsn ms ti tkcld pkipak diw ti akcrh.
‒PKRKV BV[LNKV
Rcnk c oiokht ti mocjmhk wdct mt wiuab fk amnk ti ffih-msd prigklts ih tmok, nkkp trcln ie ti-bis wmtdiut wcnmhj
ct <700 c.o. strkssmhj ivkr kvkrytdmhj tdct”s ih yiur pactk,
qumlnay ffihb stuee tdct yiu omspaclk, ochcjk tmok amnk c pri,
stcy ih tcsn hi octtkr diw ochy bmstrcltmihs rusd mhti yiur
dkcb, chb khgiy ochy oiokhts ie titca rkacxctmih. Hiw, M
bih”t nhiw cfiut yiu, fut M”b lcaa siokihk wdi lch bi tdms c
pribultmvk tdmhnkr. Mt”s tdk pkrsih wdi skkos ti dcvk kvkry-
tdmhj uhbkr lihtria bkspmtk tdk erkhzy ie oibkrh amek chb
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OMNK F]\RKV60
mh ldkln chb clliopamsdmhj wdct octtkrs. Mt”s siokihk wdi
rcrkay skkos ti fk ivkrwdkaokb ykt ochcjks ti liopaktk ch
khiroius huofkr ie prigklts. Chb mt”s tdk mhbmvmbuca wdi
usks dms ir dkr frcmh ti mts dmjdkst, oist keffilmkht lcpclmty.
Rdk cvkrcjk wirnkr tibcy wcstks cfiut tdrkk diurs pkr
kmjdt-diur wirnbcy, hit mhlaubmhj auhld chb sldkbuakb frkcn
tmok. Hit surprmsmhjay, tdk Mhtkrhkt mhtkrekrks tdk oist wmtd
iur cfmamty ti stcy eiluskb, eiaaiwkb fy liwirnkrs, silmca-
mzmhj, chb gust pacmh iab spclmhj iut. Catdiujd duochs dcvkcawcys wkctdkrkb dcrbsdmps chb tcnkh ih khiroius huo-
fkrs ie rkspihsmfmamtmks tdriujd tdk cjks, M tdmhn mt”s ecmr ti
scy tdct tibcy”s dmjd-tkld wirab prkskhts uhmquk ldcaakhjks
ti iur frcmhs, wdmld gust dcvkh”t dcb tdk auxury ie tmok ti
kviavk ti okkt tdko. Rdk coiuht ie mheiroctmih tdct wk try
ti prilkss ms cstrihiomlca, chb tdms ms c rklkht pdkhiokhih.
Gust lihsmbkr tdk bmeekrkhlk fktwkkh diw ould mheiroctmih
yiu bkcat wmtd bcmay fkeirk yiu dcb k-ocma (chb c lkaa pdihk)
chb tdk viauok yiu sdiuabkr hiw. Cbb ti tdct tdk huofkr ie
tkldhiaijmks ct iur ffihjkrtmps chb mt”s kcsy ti skk wdy ochy
ie us crk aclnmhj mh eiluskb cttkhtmih. Chb wdmak mt”s hmlk ti
tdmhn tdct wk lch lrkctk fkttkr dcfmts criuhb amomtmhj tdisk
lihstcht bmstrcltmihs, akt”s eclk mt7 Mt”s c dcrb tdmhj ti bi.M dcvk c ermkhb wdi nkkps c acrjk wctkr fittak ih dkr bksn
cs c rkomhbkr ti dkrskae cfiut diw ould khkrjy sdk dcs aket
ti jkt tdriujd dkr bcy. \dk skks tdk fittak cs c syofia ie c
amomtkb suppay, chb cs sdk brmhns tdk wctkr tdriujdiut tdk
bcy mt”s kofakoctml ie uskb frcmhpiwkr. \dk lch”t jkt tdriujd
dcae ie mt fkeirk hiih ir sdk”aa ruh iut ie jcs fkeirk tdk bcy
ms ivkr. \dk dcs ti caailctk dkr rksiurlks wmskay ti bkca wmtd
caa tdct”s ih dkr pactk chb scvk riio eir uhkxpkltkb rkspih
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63RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
chcaijy, fklcusk oy ermkhb wmaa brmhn ti dkr dkcrt”s bksmrk me
sdk”s tdmrsty. Fut wdkh sdk kxpacmhkb ti ok diw sdk caailctks
dkr khkrjy tdriujdiut tdk bcy wmtd tdk dkap ie dkr trusty
wctkr fittak ih bmspacy cs ch kxcopak, mt ocbk pkreklt skhsk
ti ok. Dkr frcmh lch kcsmay dchbak tdk <2 jmjcfytks ie bcmay
bctc.
Me yiu”rk amnk oist pkipak, tdk mbkc ie fkmhj c pribultmvk
tdmhnkr ms ch khtmlmhj ihk. Zk caa wmsd eir tdms lcpcfmamty ykt
ekka mhlrkcsmhjay ldcaakhjkb fy tdk rkcamtmks ie oibkrh amek. Mbih”t nhiw chyihk wdi biksh”t ekka ivkrwdkaokb fy mheir-
octmih, strksskb ti tdk ocx, chb pdysmlcaay chb koitmihcaay
kxdcustkb ct akcst ihlk burmhj c ‑hiroca‟ wkkn. Fut wdct me
yiu liuab luatmvctk tdk dcfmts ie c pribultmvk tdmhnkr kcsmay
chb qumlnay chb brcoctmlcaay aiwkr yiur ldchlks ie ekkamhj
furmkb fy yiur rkspihsmfmamtmks9 Ms tdms pissmfak9 M”o jimhj ti
privk ti yiu mh tdms ldcptkr tdct tdms ms mhbkkb cldmkvcfak,
skttmhj tdk jriuhbwirn eir wdct”s ti liok mh yiur giurhky ti
fkliomhj tdk socrtkst, sdcrpkst frcmh mh tdk riio.
RDK ECLR\ IE FVCMH OCRRKV
Pribultmvk tdmhnkrs crk caa criuhb yiu. Me wk bmbh”t dcvk pri-bultmvk tdmhnkrs mh tdk wirab, wk”b fk mh skrmius triufak wdkh
mt lioks ti mhhivctmih chb gust pacmh jkttmhj tdmhjs bihk.
Chb yiu bih”t dcvk ti fk c LKI ie c Eirtuhk ;00 liopchy
ti qucamey cs siokihk wdi dcs ch coczmhj cfmamty ti cllio-
pamsd c ait chb ocnk kxlkaakht bklmsmihs ct c oiokht”s hitmlk.
Pribultmvk tdmhnkrs mhdcfmt kvkry eclkt ie iur wirab, erio
tdk lirpirctk ihk ti tdk diok eriht, wdkrk tdky tcnk ldcrjk
chb nkkp tdk privkrfmca trcmhs ruhhmhj ih tmok Rdky crk tdk
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OMNK F]\RKV66
pchmks cs ould cs tdky crk tdk eirlk fkdmhb wkaa-ruh ecomamks
tdct khgiy oirk dkcatd chb dcppmhkss tdch cvkrcjk.
\ilmkty dcs rkamkb ih pribultmvk tdmhnkrs eir omaakhhmc,
fut M”o jimhj ti jukss tdct yiu carkcby nhkw tdct. ]iu gust
wcht ti nhiw diw ti luatmvctk yiur mhhkr ‑PR.‟ Fut fkeirk M
jkt ti diw kxcltay yiu”aa bi tdct, akt”s stcrt wmtd siok fcsml
eclts cfiut cttkhtmih, pribultmvmty, chb tdk luaturk ie bms-
trcltmih.
C R R K H R M IH M \ C E M HM R K V K \I[VL K
Rdkrk”s c rkcsih tdky lcaa mt ‑cttkhtmih-bkffilmt‟ bmsirbkr.
Zdkh tdkrk”s c sdirtcjk ie chytdmhj, tdct jkhkrcaay okchs
khbakss suppamks ie tdct pcrtmluacr tdmhj gust bih”t kxmst. Chb
tdms ms lkrtcmhay truk wdkh mt lioks ti okhtca cttkhtmih. Mh
eclt, tdms ms truk eir gust cfiut kvkry fmiaijmlca trchscltmih
wk eirlk iur fibmks ti ocnk. Ihk lch ihay ruh si ecst si ecr,
sakkp eir si aihj, furh si ochy lcairmks pkr diur, chb tdmhn
mhtkhtay ih c smhjak sufgklt eir si ochy omhutks ir diurs.
Zdktdkr yiu”rk trymhj ti liopaktk c ocrctdih ir cfsirf Aki
Riastiy”s Zcr chb Pkclk mh c smttmhj, yiu dcvk c amomtkb sup-
pay ie pdysmlca rksiurlks ti liopaktk tdk tcsn‒ihay si ouldjaulisk chb itdkr oktcfiaml sufstchlks ti jkt yiu tdriujd ti
tdk ffihmsd amhk. Mt”s wkaa biluokhtkb tdct wdkh yiu pkreiro
c tcsn tdct rkqumrks eilus chb cttkhtmih, tdk hkxt tcsn mook-
bmctkay eiaaiwmhj lchhit pissmfay fk bihk cs keekltmvkay, smhlk
ekwkr rksiurlks crk cvcmacfak. Ie liursk, bmeekrkht tcsns bk-
ochb bmeekrkht akvkas ie eilus chb cttkhtmih. Rcnmhj tdk trcsd
iut ms ihk tdmhj, fut khjcjmhj mh dmjd-khkrjy uhbkrtcnmhjs‒
kspklmcaay tdisk tdct khtcma lihlkhtrctmih lrmtmlca tdmhnmhj
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6<RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
tca chb/ir pdysmlca kxkrtmih‒ms chitdkr tdmhj. Chb bmstrcl-
tmihs lch rkcaay tcnk tdkmr tiaa wdkh bkochbmhj ldirks crk
mh pacy.
B M \ R V CL R M I H\ \ R K C A OIV K RD CH P V K L M I[\ R MO K
Diw ochy sklihbs ir omhutks bi yiu tdmhn mt tcnks ti rkturh
ti c tcsn tdct jit mhtkrruptkb9 Rwkhty-ffivk omhutks. Rdct”s cl-
lirbmhj ti c stuby pufamsdkb mh 600;, wdmld casi eiuhb tdctih cvkrcjk pkipak spkhb c slcht kakvkh omhutks ih c prigklt
fkeirk jkttmhj puaakb cwcy. Rmok ms coihj tdk oist prklmius
liooibmtmks tibcy. Zk caa hkkb oirk ie mt. Cs ihk Hkw ]irn
Rmoks giurhcamst put mt mh ch crtmlak suoocrmzmhj tdk actkst mh
tdk slmkhlk ie mhtkrruptmihs (chb mhbkkb, tdkrk ms suld c tdmhj),
‑Mheiroctmih ms hi aihjkr c slcrlk rksiurlk‒cttkhtmih ms.‟
Me bmstrcltmihs wkrkh”t si tmrmhj, tdkh tdky prifcfay wiuabh”t
fk si tkrrmfak. Fut bmstrcltmihs kct up tmok hit gust burmhj tdk
bmstrcltmih mtskae fut casi cetkrwcrb, wdkh yiu”rk trymhj ti jkt
fcln ti wdct yiu wkrk irmjmhcaay bimhj. Zdkh yiu sdmet yiur
eilus erio ihk tcsn ti chitdkr (ir gust okhtcaay ocnk c sdmet
mh tdmhnmhj, eir kxcopak, subbkhay turhmhj yiur cttkhtmih
erio c prigklt ct wirn ti wkknkhb pachs), yiur pribultmvktdmhnmhj tmok sdrmhns. Caa tdk wdmak yiu”rk aismhj fmiaijmlca
cooi mh tdk eiro ie jaulisk ti sustcmh yiur cttkhtmih, rk-
livkr erio bmstrcltmihs, fk lrkctmvk, tcp okoiry, uhbkrstchb
hkw mheiroctmih, chb tclnak tdk hkxt tcsn ct dchb.
RDK D[OCH FV C M H AIU K\ RI ZCHBKVBmstrcltmihs crk cppkcamhj eir c rkcsih7 Rdk frcmh aivks
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OMNK F]\RKV62
wdkrk prifcfay dcb survmvca vcauk aihj cji, wdkh wk dcb ti
kslcpk tdk duhjry gcws ie c prkymhj tmjkr ir ruh cwcy erio
c amek-tdrkctmhj eik. Fut tibcy tdisk bchjkrs crk ekw chb ecr
fktwkkh. Zk crk oirk amnkay ti vmltmomzk chb dchbmlcp iur
frcmhs wmtd okchmhjakss mhtkrruptmihs tdct dcvk hitdmhj ti
bi wmtd iur survmvca. Zk crk casi mhlrkcsmhjay ct tdk okrly
ie iur mhtkrhca bmcaijuk‒tdk pcrt ie us tdct spkcns ti us
caa bcy chb tdct siok dcvk lcaakb tdk ‑oihnky omhb.‟ Rdk
frcmh, cetkr caa, wirns caa tdk tmok, kvkh burmhj sakkp.Mh 6005, OMR hkurislmkhtmsts Rrky Dkbbkh chb Gidh Jc-
frmkam dkapkb put tdms mhti pkrspkltmvk wdkh tdky stubmkb wdct
dcppkhs mh tdk frcmh wdkh pkipak crk bmstrcltkb fy mhtkr-
hca tdiujdts wdmak bimhj bmeffiluat tcsns. Cs Br. Bcvmb Viln,
tdk cutdir ie ]iur Frcmh ct Zirn, rkpirtkb eir Psyldiaijy
Ribcy, ‑Rdky eiuhb tdct acpsks mh cttkhtmih mopcmr pkreir-
ochlk, mhbkpkhbkht ie wdct tdk tcsn ms, chb tdct tdksk acpsks
mh cttkhtmih mhviavk cltmvctmhj tdk okbmca prkerihtca lirtkx.
Rdk okbmca prkerihtca lirtkx ms ailctkb wmtdmh tdk prkerihtca
lirtkx mtskae, criuhb tdk ombbak ie yiur eirkdkcb. Mt cltmvctks
wdkh yiu tdmhn cfiut yiurskae chb itdkr pkipak. Rdms rkjmih
ie tdk frcmh ms casi pcrt ie wdct ms lcaakb tdk —bkecuat” hkt-
wirn. Rdms hktwirn fklioks cltmvk wdkh yiu crk hit bimhjould ct caa, suld cs fkmhj mh fktwkkh cltmvmtmks wdmak mh c
slchhkr.‟ Put smopay, dk lihlaubks, ‑wdkh yiu aisk kxtkrhca
eilus, tdms bkecuat frcmh hktwirn cltmvctks chb yiur cttkhtmih
jiks ti oirk mhtkrhca smjhcas, suld cs fkmhj oirk cwcrk ie
sioktdmhj tdct ocy fk fitdkrmhj yiu.‟
\i wk”vk jit twi fcsnkts ie pitkhtmca bmstrcltmihs
ti lihtkhb wmtd caa bcy7 tdisk tdct crmsk erio iur iutsmbk
wirab vmc tdk Mhtkrhkt liaakcjuks kokrjkhlmks chb fcrn
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6;RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
smakht ldcttkr wk dkcr mh iur dkcbs tdct aurks us mh caa bmeekr-
kht okhtca bmrkltmihs.
B M E E K V K H R F V C M H V K J M IH\ V [ A K B M \ R V CL R M I H\ C HB
LIHLKHRVC R M IH
Rdk pcrt ie tdk frcmh tdct nkkps us cakrt chb cfak ti bkca
wmtd c bmstrcltmih ms hit tdk scok pcrt ie tdk frcmh wdkrk wk
lihlkhtrctk. Mh itdkr wirbs, wdkh yiu akcrh diw ti brmvk clcr mh c lacssriio skttmhj chb stuby c fiin ih tdk ruaks ie
tdk ricb, yiur frcmh ms utmamzmhj ch khtmrkay bmeekrkht rkjmih
erio tdk ihk yiu usk wdkh yiu”rk cltucaay fkdmhb tdk wdkka
chb cvimbmhj ch cllmbkht. Vkskcrld mh gust tdk acst bklcbk
dcs sdiwh tdct iur cfmamty ti wmaaeuaay eilus iur cttkhtmih ms
pdysmlcaay skpcrctk mh tdk frcmh erio iur cfmamty ti bkca wmtd
bmstrcltmhj tdmhjs vymhj eir iur cttkhtmih.
Kcra Omaakr, c hkurislmkhtmst ct OMR wdi akb c 600: stuby
pufamsdkb mh tdk giurhca \lmkhlk, wcs coihj tdk ffirst slmkh-
tmsts ti bmslivkr tdct wmaaeua lihlkhtrctmih chb uhmhtkhtmihca
cttkhtmih (m.k., dcvmhj ti cvkrt ihk”s cttkhtmih ti ch ifvmius,
kyk-jrcffmhj bmstrcltmih) crk hit ihk chb tdk scok chb crk
hit lihtriaakb fy tdk scok rkjmih ie tdk frcmh. Cs fkcutmeuaaybkslrmfkb fy Acurch Hkkrjccrb eir tdk Cssilmctkb Prkss wdkh
sdk rkpirtkb ih Omaakr”s stuby, ‑Rdkrk crk twi ocmh wcys tdk
frcmh pcys cttkhtmih7 —tip biwh” ir wmaaeua, jica-irmkhtkb ct-
tkhtmih, suld cs wdkh yiu eilus ti rkcb, chb —fittio-up”
ir rkstkxmvk cttkhtmih ti skhsiry mheiroctmih‒aiub himsks
ir frmjdt liairs ir tdrkctkhmhj chmocas. Amnkwmsk, tdkrk crk
bmeekrkht bkjrkks ie cttkhtmih bmsirbkrs. \iok pkipak dcvk c
dcrbkr tmok eilusmhj wdmak itdkrs dcvk c dcrbkr tmok ffiatkr
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OMNK F]\RKV65
Omaakr pkreirokb dms stuby ih oihnkys usmhj pcmhakss
kakltribks ti kxcomhk diw tdksk twi nky crkcs wirnkb ti-
jktdkr wdkh tdk frcmh wcs prksskb ti pcy cttkhtmih. Rrcmhkb
mh tcnmhj cttkhtmih tksts ih vmbki slrkkhs, tdk oihnkys wkrk
eirlkb ti catkrhctkay lihlkhtrctk chb bkca wmtd bmstrcltmihs.
Okchwdmak, Omaakr chb dms tkco liuab bklmpdkr wdmld crkcs
ie tdk frcmh wkrk amjdtmhj up bkpkhbmhj ih wdct tdk oihnkys
wkrk trymhj ti bi. Zdkh tdk oihnkys viauhtcrmay lihlkh-
trctkb (scy, fy pmlnmhj iut c aket-akchmhj rkb rkltchjak erio cffikab ie rkb rkltchjaks), Omaakr hitmlkb tdct tdkmr frcmhs” lkh-
tkr eir kxklutmvk euhltmih wcs mh ldcrjk. Rdms ms tdk ‑dmjdkr
irbkr‟ crkc ie tdk frcmh, wdmld dchbaks cbvchlkb okhtca
prilkssks. Zk usk iur kxklutmvk euhltmih ti pkreiro cltmvm-
tmks suld cs pachhmhj, irjchmzmhj, strctkjmzmhj, pcymhj cttkh-
tmih ti chb rkokofkrmhj bktcmas, chb ochcjmhj tmok chb
spclk‒cltmvmtmks tdct ldcrcltkrmzk sipdmstmlctkb tdmhnmhj
skkh ihay mh prmoctks. Fut wdkh sioktdmhj jrcffkb tdk oih-
nkys” cttkhtmih, tdkmr frcmhs fkjch smjhcamhj erio chitdkr
crkc eiuhb ct tdk fcln lcaakb tdk pcrmktca lirtkx. Chb tdkh
Omaakr ifskrvkb kakltrmlca cltmvmty mh fitd ie tdksk crkcs rksi-
hctmhj tijktdkr cs tdky lioouhmlctkb. Fut tdkmr mhbmvmbuca
erkqukhlmks wkrk hit tdk scok, sujjkstmhj tdct tdk ‑viauok‟ie kcld smjhca wcs bmeekrkht. Mt turhs iut tdct sustcmhmhj eilus
chb lihlkhtrctmih khtcmas aiwkr-erkqukhly hkurihca cltmvmty,
wdkrkcs subbkh bmstrcltmihs mhviavk dmjdkr erkqukhlmks. Cl-
lirbmhj ti Bkfrc Fcfliln, c hkuriaijmst ct tdk Hctmihca Mh-
stmtutks ie Dkcatd, Omaakr”s stuby ieekrkb iur ffirst aiin mhti
diw tdksk pdysmlcaay bmstmhlt rkjmihs ie tdk frcmh mhtkrclt ti
jivkrh iur cttkhtmih, ir ct akcst pcrt ie mt.
Zdkh wk ziio iut ti lihhklt siok bits dkrk mt”s kcsy
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6: RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
ie iur cttkhtmih. Cetkr caa, rkstkxmvk cttkhtmih‒rkcltmhj ti c
ldcrjmhj fuaa, eir mhstchlk‒ms c prmomtmvk survmvca tiia. Fut
tdk cfmamty ti lihlkhtrctk eir chy akhjtd ie tmok ms c ould
oirk cbvchlkb snmaa. Mh Omaakr”s wirbs7 ‑Me sioktdmhj akcps
iut ie tdk fusd ct ok, tdct”s jimhj ti fk rkcaay mopirtcht chb
M dcvk ti rkclt ti mt rmjdt cwcy. ]iur frcmh ms kqumppkb ti
hitmlk tdmhjs scamkht mh tdk khvmrihokht. Mt tcnks c truay mhtka-
amjkht lrkcturk ti nhiw wdct”s mopirtcht chb eilus.‟
Rdk kxclt okldchmls ie diw iur frcmhs ocnk shcp gubj-okhts ti bmstmhjumsd fktwkkh truay amek-tdrkctkhmhj bmstrcl-
tmihs chb gust pacmh humschlks ms c pipuacr crkc ie stuby
tibcy. Zdkh tdk iab pcrmktca pcrt ie iur frcmh mbkhtmffiks ch
cttkhtmih jrcffkr, diw biks mt ffijurk iut wdct sdiuab fk mj-
hirkb chb wdct”s mopirtcht khiujd ti eilus ih chb mhvmtk
itdkr, oirk cbvchlkb rkjmihs ie tdk frcmh ti ldmok mh cfiut9
Zk bih”t dcvk caa tdk chswkrs ykt, fut ihk tdmhj ms lkrtcmh7
Zk crk mhhctkay kqumppkb ti dchbak fitd mhlihvkhmkht mh-
tkrekrkhlks chb dmjd-lihlkpt mbkcs tdct rkqumrk dmjd-akvka
tdmhnmhj, ietkh ct tdk scok tmok. Chb tdct, oy ermkhbs, ms
prifcfay wdct ocnks duochs si uhmquk chb mhbkkb mhtka-
amjkht. Mt”s casi wdct lch lrkctk ldcis mh iur frcmhs wdkh
wk”rk trymhj ti prilkss c lihstukhlk ie mbkcs smouatchkiusay.Lihbultmhj fitd dmjd- chb aiw-akvka tdmhnmhj ct tdk scok
tmok lch jkhkrctk c lihstmlt ie mhtkrkst, si ti spkcn, mh tdk
frcmh. Gust rklcaa tdk acst tmok yiu okcht ti bi sioktdmhj
mopirtcht, suld cs rkspihb ti c liaakcjuk”s lrmtmlca k-ocma
cfiut c bkcbamhk, chb rkcamzkb cetkr skvkrca omhutks ir kvkh
diurs tdct yiu hkvkr tclnakb tdct ldirk fklcusk c skrmks ie
bmvkrsmihs puaakb yiu iee tcsn. Zk lch dcvk tdk fkst mhtkh-
tmihs ie cbbrkssmhj lkrtcmh rkspihsmfmamtmks fut tdkh fkliok
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OMNK F]\RKV64
try ti gujjak wcrrmhj ecltmihs. Ir lihsmbkr c tmok wdkh yiu
wkrk euaay khjcjkb mh c lrkctmvk khbkcvir, suld cs wrmtmhj
ch crtmlak ir frcmhstiromhj mbkcs eir ch upliomhj okktmhj,
chb wmtdmh sklihbs yiur trcmh ie tdiujdt wcs frinkh fy c
pdihk lcaa ir siokihk wcanmhj mhti yiur ieffilk. Mt tcnks yiu
c aihj tmok ti rkturh ti tdct scok trcmh ie tdiujdt ihlk tdk
bmstrcltmih ms ivkr, chb eir siok, tdisk mhsmjdteua tdiujdts
tdct wkrk oivmhj tdriujd tdk frcmh wdkh tdk mhtkrruptmih
illurrkb crk mopissmfak ti rktrmkvk. Rdky crk jihk.Actkr mh tdms fiin, M”aa bmsluss tdk hitmih ie ouatmtcsnmhj.
Catdiujd wk amnk ti tdmhn wk lch ochcjk ouatmpak tcsns ct
tdk scok tmok, tdk frcmh biksh”t bi tdct. Mhstkcb, mt dchbaks
tcsns skqukhtmcaay, swmtldmhj fktwkkh ihk tcsn chb chitdkr.
Fut frcmhs lch gujjak tcsns vkry qumlnay, tdus jmvmhj us tdk
maausmih tdct wk lch pkreiro twi tdmhjs ct ihlk. Mh rkcamty,
tdiujd, tdk frcmh ms swmtldmhj cttkhtmih fktwkkh tcsns, cafkmt
ecst khiujd eir us ti fcrkay hitmlk lihslmiusay.
RDK D[OCH FV C M H DC\ C F[ M AR - M H \ ]\ R KO RI EIL[\ !
\i M gust ffihmsdkb kxpacmhmhj diw tdk frcmh lch wirn cs c
uhmt ti gujjak liopktmhj bkochbs tdct wcht iur mookbmctkcttkhtmih chb tdmhnmhj prilkssks tdct lcaa ih iur cbvchlkb
cfmamty ti eilus mhtkhtay. C jiib qukstmih7 Diw bi wk stcy
eiluskb9 Mh itdkr wirbs, diw lch wk prkvkht bmstrcltmihs
erio khlricldmhj ih tdk hkurca lmrlumtry fumat ti eclmamtctk
lihlkhtrctmih9 Mt bkpkhbs ih diw wkaa wk lch stip tdisk
bmstrcltmihs erio jcmhmhj tii ould cttkhtmih.
Ihk ie tdk oist ecoius tksts uskb ti stuby tdk clt ie
eilusmhj ms lcaakb tdk \triip tkst hcokb cetkr Gidh Vmbaky
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6=RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
eklt‟ mh 3=<;. Mt dcs smhlk fkliok c wmbkay uskb tkst mh psy-
ldiaijy lmrlaks ti stuby diw ecst pkipak lch mbkhtmey liairs
chb wirbs wdkh tdisk wirbs chb liairs bih”t hklksscrmay
octld up. Eir kxcopak, me yiu wkrk jmvkh wirbs prmhtkb mh
bmeekrkht liairs chb csnkb ti scy tdk liair ie tdk tkxt‒hit
tdk wirb mtskae‒ldchlks crk yiu”b ffihb mt ould dcrbkr ti scy
tdk liair tdch ti rkcb tdk wirb. Mh tdk smopak kxcopak fkaiw,
tdk frcmh dcs c strihj bksmrk ti chswkr ‑jrcy‟ eir iptmih l,
rctdkr tdch ‑facln.‟ Chb tdct”s tdk \triip keeklt.
c. Facln
f. Jrcy
l. Jrcy
b. Facln
Me yiu wkrk ti sullksseuaay scy tdk wirb ‑facln,‟ tdkh
yiu wiuab dcvk mhdmfmtkb ch cutioctml rkspihsk mh yiur
frcmh, wdmld ms hit ch kcsy tdmhj ti bi. Zk nhiw hiw erio
slchs pkreirokb fy hkurislmkhtmsts tdct pkipak wdi lch
failn tdkmr hcturca rkspihsks crk rkaymhj ih ihk pcrtmluacr
rkjmih ie tdkmr frcmh ti bi si. Mt amks wmtdmh tdk prkerihtca
lirtkx, tulnkb fkdmhb tdk rmjdt chb aket tkopaks, chb cppkcrsti fk nky ti caa typks ie rkstrcmhts. (Eir tdisk mhtkrkstkb, mt”s
lcaakb tdk rmjdt chb aket vkhtriactkrca prkerihtca lirtkx, ir
UAPEL.)
Mh kvkrybcy amek, wk mhtkhtmihcaay eima c ait ie iur frcmh”s
hcturca, rkstkxmvk rkspihsks, chb tdms cfmamty rksts ldmksty ih
tdms amttak crkc mh iur prkerihtca lirtkx. Zdkh wk prkvkht
iur dchb, eir mhstchlk, erio lctldmhj c brippmhj ifgklt, ir
mhdmfmt okhtca ir kvkh koitmihca rkspihsk tdms tmhy rkjmih
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OMNK F]\RKV<0
systko. Catdiujd tdk frcmh khliopcssks vcrmius cllkakrc-
tirs ti lioochb oyrmcb cltmvmtmks‒erio oivkokht chb
achjucjk ti koitmihs chb okoirmks‒mt cppcrkhtay dcs ihay
ihk lkhtrcamzkb frcnmhj systko. Chb iur cfmamty ti utmamzk
tdms frcnmhj systko keekltmvkay skkos ti lirrkactk laiskay ti
diw wkaa wk lch eilus. Put smopay, eilus rkqumrks tdct wk
tkcld iurskavks diw ti stip tdk frcmh erio vkkrmhj biwh tdk
pctd ie uttkr bmstrcltmih, wdkrk frcnmhj fklioks dcrb me hit
mopissmfak. Zdct”s oirk, iur mhtkrhca frcnmhj systko msh”tcs strihj cs wk”b prifcfay amnk mt ti fk, kspklmcaay jmvkh tdk
eirlks wk”rk bkcamhj wmtd tibcy chb tdk dmjd akvka ie bmstrcl-
tmihs tdct lch skhb chy frcmh mhti ivkrbrmvk. Fklcusk iur
mhtkrhca frcnmhj systko ms diuskb mh tdk prkerihtca lirtkx,
mt”s pcrt ie tdk oist bkamlctk, mopctmkht, chb khkrjy-duhjry
rkjmih ie tdk frcmh.
Rdk jiib hkws, diwkvkr, ms tdct fy vmrtuk ie iur duoch-
hkss, wk lch mh eclt jcmh lihtria ie tdms rkjmih chb akcrh diw
ti oirk keekltmvkay prilkss mhliomhj mheiroctmih si wk lch
ffiatkr iut tdk lauttkr chb diok mh ih tdk mopirtcht. Chb M”o
jimhj ti fk dkapmhj yiu bi gust tdct wmtd tdk dkap ie oy smx
snmaas.
R KLDHIAIJ] M \H ” R C AZC]\ I[V FVC M H ” \ F K\ R E V M K HB
Rkldhiaijy ocnks iur amvks si ould kcsmkr. Zk lch lio-
ouhmlctk wmtd pkipak mh c hchisklihb usmhj samln bkvmlks
tdct wk lcrry criuhb mh iur pilnkts, chb wk lch lihbult
kxtkhsmvk chb lioprkdkhsmvk rkskcrld tibcy fy akttmhj iur
ffihjkrtmps bi tdk wcanmhj ihamhk cs wk usk skcrld khjmhks amnk
Jiijak Fut tdms wihbkreua cllkssmfmamty khjkhbkrs aczmhkss
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<3RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
hkkb, si wk bih”t dcvk ti rkokofkr tdko. Lcaluactirs livkr
oist ie iur octd, chb cpps ih iur socrtpdihks tkaa us diw
ould tmp ti akcvk ct c rkstcurcht. Kvkh tdk crt ie aihjdchb
wrmtmhj, wdmld kopaiys lrkctmvk pcrts ie tdk frcmh, ms fkmhj
aist ti tdk nkyficrbs.
Rdkrk ms c tmok chb c paclk eir caa tdms tkldhiaijy, fut
tdkrk”s casi c tmok chb c paclk eir jiib iab trcbmtmihca prif-
ako siavmhj‒eir akttmhj yiur frcmh bi caa tdk wirn, wdmld
dcs fkhkffits yiu wiuabh”t fkamkvk. Ihk wcy eir ok ti lih-vky tdms ti yiu ms ti ieekr tdk eiaaiwmhj chcaijmks. Akt”s scy
yiu hkkb ti uhbkrji skrmius dkcrt surjkry. Bi yiu wcht tdk
surjkih wdi akcrhkb caa ie dms snmaas tdriujd ch mhchmoctk
lioputkr, ir wiuab yiu prkekr tdk biltir wdi jcmhkb dms
kxpkrtmsk tdriujd dchbs-ih trcmhmhj wmtd rkca pctmkhts9 Oy
jukss ms tdct yiu”b pmln tdk surjkih wmtd tdk ‑rkca‟ kxpkrm-
khlk. ]iu wcht tdk ihk wdi dcs fkkh ldcaakhjkb ti usk dms
frcmh mh caa sirts ie wcys ti siavk prifakos mh tdk ipkrct-
mhj riio. Dk”s tdk ihk wdi dcs fkkh bimhj wdct”s lcaakb
slceeiabmhj eir c aihj tmok. ‑\lceeiabmhj‟ ms c tkro uskb mh
kbulctmihca lmrlaks ti bkslrmfk diw wk syhtdksmzk iur kxpkrm-
khlks, puaamhj cspklts erio ihk kxpkrmkhlk mhti chitdkr mh
irbkr ti fumab iur nhiwakbjk fcsk chb siavk hkw prifakosusmhj c liofmhctmih ie wdct wk carkcby nhiw chb wdct
wk”rk prkskhtay akcrhmhj ir liherihtkb wmtd.
Mh kvkrybcy prifako siavmhj, mt dkaps ti fk fiin socrt ir
ti usk tkldhiaijy ti crrmvk ct rksuats, fut tdk pkrsih wdi lch
luaa erio oyrmcb akssihs mh amek ms ietkh tdk ihk wdi wmaa
ffihb c fkttkr ir oirk prklmsk chb cllurctk chswkr. Mt”s gust
amnk stymhj. ]iu bih”t wcht tdk pmait wdi dcsh”t stiwh c rkca
pachk chb wdi ihay rklkhtay jrcbuctkb erio stmjdt smouactmih
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OMNK F]\RKV<6
\i mocjmhk tdms mbkc cppamkb ti tdk rkcao ie pribultmvk
tdmhnmhj. Pribultmvk tdmhnkrs bih”t jkt ti wdkrk tdky crk mh
amek fy rkaymhj ih tkldhiaijy ir fy fkmhj gust fiin socrt.
Rdky lkrtcmhay tcnk cbvchtcjk ie tkldhiaijy chb tkxtfiins,
fut tdky bkpkhb ih tdkmr mhhctk frcmhpiwkr ffirst chb eirk-
oist, mhlaubmhj tdk pcrt tdct trmjjkrs tdko ti csn qukstmihs,
ldcaakhjk tdk hiro, chb rkeusk ti cllkpt ‑M lch”t.‟ Rdky cl-
lkss chb utmamzk ‑rkca‟ snmaas iftcmhkb erio c liofmhctmih ie
fclnjriuhb nhiwakbjk chb kxpkrmkhlk tdct caaiws tdko tistchb iut chb ocnk c bmeekrkhlk mh tdk wirab, ti cbcpt chb
rkspihb ti hkw hkkbs chb lmrluostchlks.
PVIIE IE LIHLKPR
C liupak ie ykcrs cji, M duhtkb biwh nmbs M”b tcujdt oirk
tdch c bklcbk kcramkr. M dcb trcmhkb tdko ih ochy ie tdk vkry
akssihs eiuhb mh tdms fiin, caa ie wdmld wkrk mhtkhbkb ti
dkap tdko keeirtakssay akcrh chytdmhj tdct tdky”b khliuhtkr
ih tdkmr ricb ti sullkss mh amek.
M wchtkb ti nhiw wdct dcb dcppkhkb ti tdko. Bmb oy
tiias dkap tdko scma tdriujd tdk rmjirs ie bkvkaipmhj frmjdt,
lrkctmvk omhbs tdct liuab keeirtakssay tclnak tiujd ldcaakhjks9Bmb tdky octurk mhti pribultmvk tdmhnkrs, kxlka mh tdkmr clc-
bkoml pursumts, chb jrcbuctk wmtd dihirs erio dmjd sldiia9
Bmb tdky ocnk mt ti liaakjk9 Ri kamtk ihks9 Ir bmb tdky ffizzak
iut chb omrrir tdk cvkrcjk bripiut rctks hctmihwmbk9
Jrchtkb, tdms wcsh”t okcht ti fk c slmkhtmffil kxpkrmokht,
chb tdk jriup ie stubkhts wcs socaa, fut M tdiujdt mt wiuab
fk wirtdwdmak ti skk wdct dcb fkliok ie pkipak M dcb kh-
liuhtkrkb chb trcmhkb kcray ih Zk ochcjkb ti ffihb c dchb
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<<RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
jihk ih ti prkstmjmius uhmvkrsmtmks, erio OMR ti Fkrnkaky.
\i M tdkh dcb ti csn oyskae7 Diw ould ie tdkmr pitkhtmca
wcs mhhctk chb diw ould wcs sdcpkb mh tdisk eiroctmvk
ykcrs9 Liuab tdk akssihs M tcujdt tdko mh diw ti fkliok
qumln, keffilmkht tdmhnkrs dcvk dcb c trkokhbius mopclt ih
tdkmr ivkrcaa sullkss9 Bmb M dcvk chytdmhj ti bi wmtd tdkmr
cldmkvkokhts9
Zmtd ould duomamty, M”o dcppy ti rkpirt tdct tdksk
nmbs, wdi crk hiw cbuats, dcb siok vkry hmlk tdmhjs ti scycfiut ok chb oy strctkjmks. Ochy ie tdko cttrmfutkb ould
ie tdkmr sullkss ti tdisk tkldhmquks, wdmld dkapkb tdko
lrumsk tdriujd caa sirts ie bmeekrkht lacssks chb sufgklts. Ihk
wioch scmb sdk dcb ti akcrh caa ie tdk fihks mh tdk fiby bur-
mhj c pcrtmluacray tiujd liaakjk liursk, chb sdk bmb si usmhj
tdk tcltml sdk”b akcrhkb erio ok oirk tdch c bklcbk fkeirk.
\ueffilk mt ti scy, M wcs vkry priub.
Hiw, yiu”rk prifcfay cssuomhj tdct M tcujdt c dmjday
jmetkb jriup ie nmbs wdi wkrk wkaa ih tdkmr wcy ti jrchb
euturks rkjcrbakss ie oy akssihs. Pkrdcps tdct”s truk, tdiujd M
wmaa scy tdct tdksk wkrk hit nmbs khriaakb mh jmetkb prijrcos,
chb M wcs hit tcrjktmhj prmvctk ir prkp sldiias. Fut eir gust c
oiokht, akt”s lihsmbkr wdct nmhb ie mopclt M omjdt dcvk dcbih tdksk stubkhts” bkvkaipmhj frcmhs.
Mt”s aihj fkkh nhiwh tdct frcmhpiwkr ms acrjkay mhdkrmtkb.
Kxpkrts fkamkvk tdct upwcrb ie :0 pkrlkht ie iur frcmh”s pri-
lkssmhj spkkb ms c ecltir ie iur jkhks, wdmld akcvks <0 pkrlkht
ti tdk khvmrihokht.
Fut tdct <0 pkrlkht ms ould oirk smjhmffilcht tdch
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OMNK F]\RKV<2
Eir crjuokht”s scnk, akt”s lihsmbkr tdk eiaaiwmhj chca-
ijy, wdmld ocy skko wmabay uhrkactkb, fut fkcr wmtd ok. Mh
tdk jkhkrca pipuactmih, chyihk”s ldchlk ie fkliomhj ifksk
ms << pkrlkht fcskb ih tdk khvmrihokht chb 5: pkrlkht fcskb
ih jkhks. Hi ihk wiuab bmscjrkk tdct jkhktmls pacys c riak
mh fiby typk, smzk, oktcfiamso, chb pripkhsmty ti jcmh ir
aisk wkmjdt. Fut biksh”t mt skko c amttak liuhtkrmhtumtmvk ti
cttrmfutk gust c rkactmvkay slcht << pkrlkht ie ihk”s ivkrcaa
rmsn ie fkliomhj ifksk ti tdk khvmrihokht9 Bih”t kxkrlmsk,bmkt, chb jkhkrca amekstyak ecltirs wkmjd mhti tdct kquctmih c
fmt oirk9 Cetkr caa, wk dkcr pakhty ie sullkss stirmks erio
pkipak wdi aisk ocssmvk coiuhts ie wkmjdt chb kslcpk tdk
ectks ie tdkmr ivkrwkmjdt ecomay okofkrs gust fy ldchjmhj
diw tdky amvk, wdct tdky kct, chb diw tdky oivk tdkmr fib-
mks. Eir tdko, tdk pkrlkhtcjks sdiuab fk rkvkrskb‒tdky ocy
fk scbbakb wmtd ch uhaulny skt ie jkhks tdct ocnks mt dcrbkr
ti ocmhtcmh ch mbkca wkmjdt, fut tdct biksh”t rkhbkr mt mopis-
smfak ir prkvkht tdko erio bimhj si. Rdky bkey tdk ibbs fy
wirnmhj ih tdkmr fibmks kvkry bcy chb ocnmhj kvkry pkrlkht
ie tdct khvmrihokhtca ecltir liuht. Put smopay, tdct << pkr-
lkht lch fk smjhmffilcht, rkcaay fmj (hi puh mhtkhbkb).
M fkamkvk tdct tdk scok diabs truk wdkh mt lioks ti tdkfrcmh”s lcpclmty. Zk tkhb ti ivkrkstmoctk diw ould ms bk-
tkromhkb fy iur jkhks chb eirjkt tdct c ait ie iur okhtca
prilkssmhj piwkr ms c pribult ie skae-bmslmpamhk, kbulctmih,
chb c lioomtokht ti trcmhmhj chb usmhj iur omhbs ti wirn c
lkrtcmh wcy. Mt”s amnk tdct iab Rdiocs Kbmsih scymhj7 Jkhmus
ms 3 pkrlkht mhspmrctmih chb == pkrlkht pkrspmrctmih. Rdisk
crk pkrlkhtcjks M lch cjrkk wmtd!
Fksmbks me mhtkaamjkhlk wkrk si biomhctkb fy jkhktmls
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<;RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
eiro tdk amvks ie tdiuschbs ie stubkhts‒chb cbuats‒kvkry
ykcr. M bih”t scy tdms ti jaict ir ti tiit oy iwh dirh. M scy
tdms fklcusk, mh wirnmhj wmtd tdk jkhkrca pufaml, M khliuhtkr
ch khiroius omx ie tcakht chb mhdkrmtkb mhtkaamjkhlk clriss
tdk spkltruo, erio tdisk wdi strujjak omjdtmay wmtd akcrh-
mhj chb pkreiromhj octd ti dmjday jmetkb wdmzzks wdi crk
tdk khvy ie tdk cvkrcjk stubkhts.
Chb me tdkrk”s ihk tdmhj tdct oy kxpkrmkhlk dcs bkoih-
strctkb ti ok ivkr chb ivkr cjcmh, mt”s tdct hi octtkr wdctnmhb ie frcmh yiu”rk firh wmtd, chb rkjcrbakss ie jkhktml mh-
tkaamjkhlk trcmts, tdk frcmh ms dmjday pamcfak, ould mh tdk wcy
c ouslak lch fk ocbk strihjkr wmtd kxkrlmsk. Chb hkuri-
slmkhtmsts cjrkk. Akt”s tcnk c qumln tiur ie diw tdk frcmh lch
fmiaijmlcaay jriw chb ldchjk. Mt”s ykt oirk priie tdct yiu
lch bkvkaip mhti c pribultmvk tdmhnkr, fklcusk yiur frcmh
euhltmih ms ecr erio ffixkb.
Rdk omhb ms truay tdk lkhtkr ie yiur amek, prilkssmhj
chb mhtkrprktmhj kvkry oiokht ie yiur kxpkrmkhlk. Mt
ms tdk ocmh jkhkrctir ie tdk tdiujdts, koitmihs, chb
bklmsmihs tdct lch ceeklt yiu chb yiur ldchlk ie sul-lkss mh fmj chb suftak wcys. Zdkh yiu akcrh ti lih-
tria mts aicb chb spkkb, yiu lch ocxmomzk mts piwkr.
C \OCA A A K \ \IH IH ]I[V F M J FV C M H ” \ F M I AIJ]
Zdkh M scy tdct M diab oy frcmh ti fk tdk oist mopirtcht
irjch mh oy fiby M rkcaay okch tdct chb M bi caa tdct M lch
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OMNK F]\RKV<5
tdct yiur dkcrt ir yiur ‑siua‟ diabs tdk nky ti amek, fut M
wiuab pmh tdk sklrkt ti amek ih oy trusty iab frcmh. Chb tdk
eclt tdct tdk frcmh ms pamcfak ct chy cjk ocnks mt kvkh oirk
mopirtcht ti trcmh chb prkskrvk mt kvkry smhjak bcy. Fkmhj cfak
ti ldchjk tdk frcmh ms tdk eiuhbctmih ie oy wirn.
Me tdkrk”s ihk bkffihmhj ekcturk ti iur frcmhs tdct lakcray
skts us cpcrt erio caa itdkr spklmks, mt”s jit ti fk iur cocz-
mhj cfmamty ti tdmhn. Emsd, copdmfmchs, rkptmaks, chb fmrbs, eir
mhstchlk, bih”t bi ould ‑tdmhnmhj.‟ Rdky mhstkcb lihlkrhtdkoskavks wmtd tdk kvkrybcy fusmhkss ie jctdkrmhj eiib, kct-
mhj, brmhnmhj, sakkpmhj, rkpribulmhj, chb bkekhbmhj tdko-
skavks. Rdksk tcsns bih”t rkqumrk lijhmtmvk tdiujdt ct caa.
Rdky crk mhstmhltuca prilkssks, si tdk chmocas” frcmhs crk
biomhctkb fy tdk ocgir lkhtkrs tdct lihtria tdksk cutioctml
euhltmihs. Zmtd iur ‑rkptmamch‟ frcmhs fumat mhti us, wk casi
pkreiro tdksk euhltmihs, wdmld crk eiuhb mh rkocrncfay smo-
macr pcrts ie tdk frcmh.
Fut cbbmtmihca rkjmihs mh iur frcmhs dcvk kviavkb tdct
caaiw us ti bi si ould oirk tdch c fuj ir c fmrb. Zk lch
tdmhn wmtd purpisk chb mhtkht, eiro achjucjk, pach iur eu-
turk, pcss gubjokht, chb chcayzk mheiroctmih chb stmouam mh
uhmqukay sipdmstmlctkb wcys.Rdk coczmhj cfmamtmks ie tdk duoch omhb rkviavk criuhb
mts lcpclmty ti fiofcrb mtskae wmtd omaamihs ie fmts ie bmvkrsk
mheiroctmih kvkry smhjak bcy. Mt oust casi fk cfak ti stirk
chb lihvkrt tdksk mhti mhtkaamjkht tdiujdts. Mt cldmkvks tdms
fy kvcauctmhj, sirtmhj, ffijurmhj, chb rkbmrkltmhj mheiroctmih
fcskb ih skqukhlks chb rkactmihsdmps. Mt bmslcrbs tdk mrrka-
kvcht fmts ie mheiroctmih chb ffiaas tdk fachns wmtd pmklks ie
mheiroctmih erio mts stirkb ffiaks
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<: RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
fmrtd cs mh cbuatdiib, fut tdisk lkaas jriw, rkcldmhj ocxm-
ouo smzk ct cfiut cjk smx. C hkwfirh”s frcmh trmpaks mh smzk mh
tdk ffirst ykcr ie amek. (Hi wihbkr fcfmks dcvk suld fmj dkcbs!)
Cetkr tdct ffirst ykcr, frcmh smzk biksh”t mhlrkcsk vkry ould cs
wk akcrh oirk mheiroctmih chb pcln oirk mhti iur riujday
tdrkk-piuhb frcmhs. Fut wdct biks jriw acrjkr ms tdk huofkr
ie hkurihs‒hkrvk lkaas‒chb tdk liopakxmty ie tdkmr hkt-
wirn. Rdk cbuat frcmh dcrfirs fktwkkh ffietkkh fmaamih chb
twi duhbrkb fmaamih hkurihs, chb tdk eclt tdct wk lch”t nhiweir surk kxcltay diw ochy hkurihs tdk typmlca cbuat dcs jiks
ti sdiw diw ould wk gust bih”t nhiw cfiut iur frcmhs chb
tdkmr lcpclmty. \i ould cfiut iur frcmhs rkocmhs c oystkry.
BMB ]I[ NHIZ9
30 ti 6< ? tdk huofkr ie wctts ie piwkr yiur frcmh
jkhkrctks wdkh yiu”rk cwcnk (tdct”s khiujd ti
turh ih c amjdtfuaf!)
60 ? tdk pkrlkhtcjk ie ixyjkh chb faiib stiw jimhj
ti yiur frcmh
3,000 ti 30,000 ? tdk huofkr ie syhcpsks eir kcldhkurih mh yiur frcmh
300,000 ? tdk huofkr ie omaks ie faiib vksskas mh
yiur frcmh
:00,000 ? tdk huofkr ie tdiujdts yiu dcvk kcld bcy
30 fmaamih khlylaipkbmc pcjks ? tdk coiuht ie mheir-
octmih yiur frcmh ms lcpcfak ie rkokofkrmhj
3; fmaamih ti 600 fmaamih ? tdk huofkr ie hkurihs mh
yiur frcmh
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OMNK F]\RKV<4
Fut ihk tdmhj wk bi nhiw7 Zdkh wk kxkrlmsk iur frcmhs
(cs yiu”rk bimhj rmjdt hiw wdmak lihlkhtrctmhj ih rkcbmhj
tdms), wk stmouactk tdk lrkctmih ie hkw hkurihs. Kvkry tmok
wk rkokofkr sioktdmhj ir dcvk c hkw tdiujdt‒fco!‒
wk”vk gust lrkctkb c hkw lihhkltmih siokwdkrk mh iur frcmh
tdct fiists mts ivkrcaa piwkr.
C jrkct wcy ti vmsucamzk tdms nmhb ie cltmvmty chb
‑jriwtd‟ ms ti pmlturk c frcmh chb caa ie mts squmjjaks chb fmts
ie bctc cs rkprkskhtkb fy tdk stcrs chb mhtkrlihhkltmhj amhksti lrkctk hktwirns7
Akt”s prktkhb tdct tdms frcmh tcnks c dmstiry lacss. Rdk
frcmh tdkh stcrts ti aiin amnk tdms7
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<=RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
Hitmlk tdct M”vk cbbkb c ekw oirk ‑stcrs‟ ih tdk frcmh.
Rdksk rkprkskht hkw eclts ir nhiwakbjk tdct tdk frcmh dcs
dcb ti rktcmh burmhj tdk lacss. Hiw aiin ct wdct dcppkhs
ivkr tmok cs oirk mheiroctmih lioks mh, siok ie wdmld rk-
mheirlks iab nhiwakbjk chb siok ie wdmld ms titcaay hkw7
Dkrk wk dcvk ochy oirk eclts (stcrs) ti clliooibctk‒ocnmhj c oirk liopakx hktwirn‒chb c ould strihjkr frcmh
wirnmhj ct c dmjdkr akvka ie piwkr. Mt”s amt up wmtd cltmvmty.
Jrchtkb, tdms bkslrmptmih ie diw tdk frcmh wirns ms
okrkay c oktcpdir. Mt wih”t dkap yiu pcss chy okbmlca tksts
ir wmh yiu ch kcsy C eir kxpacmhmhj diw tdk frcmh ipkrctks
erio c purkay fmiaijmlca stchbpimht. Fut tdk oktcpdir ms c
jiib ihk. Mt sdiws tdct tdk frcmh dcs ch mookhsk lcpclmty
ti cllkpt mhliomhj bctc, rkmheirlk iab ffiaks, chb upaicb hkw
ihks fy irldkstrctmhj c frmaamcht mhtkrpacy coihj mts omaamihs
ie hkurihs. Rdk frcmh rkocmhs lcpcfak tdriujdiut iur amek-
tmoks ie lrkctmhj hkw hkurihs chb eiromhj erksd lihhkltmihs
coihj tdisk hkurihs, chb tdct”s jiib hkws eir us fklcusk mt
okchs tdct hi ihk ms stuln wmtd c ‑fcb‟ frcmh‒chyihk lchmoprivk dms ir dkr frcmh.
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OMNK F]\RKV20
BMB ]I[ NHIZ9
• Rdk frcmh ms c ait oirk cbcptcfak cs mt cjks tdch
yiu omjdt tdmhn. Hkuriaijmsts rkekr ti tdk frcmh”s
cfmamty ti ldchjk cs mts ‑pacstmlmty.‟
• Akcrhmhj diw ti rkacx chb rkst yiur frcmh ms cs
mopirtcht cs akcrhmhj diw ti stkx chb wirn mt.Rdms kxpacmhs wdy sakkp ms si ksskhtmca ti nkkp-
mhj tdk frcmh prkpcrkb ti akcrh hkw mheiroctmih
qumlnay. Mt”s fkkh sdiwh tdct puaamhj ch caa-
hmjdtkr bklrkcsks tdk cfmamty ti lrco mh hkw eclts
fy hkcray 20 pkrlkht! Cppcrkhtay, sakkp bkprmvc-
tmih sduts biwh lkrtcmh frcmh rkjmihs. (Chb eir
tdk rklirb, M”o c ocstkr ct sakkpmhj. Oy frcmh
wih”t qumt burmhj tdk bcy, fut ct hmjdt M lch turh
mt iee ct c oiokht”s hitmlk.)
• Ihk ie tdk tip wcys ti tcnk lcrk ie yiur omhb ms
ti ocnk surk yiur dkcrt ms pkreiromhj ct mts fkst.
Mh itdkr wirbs, wdkh yiur fiby (chb dkcrt) crk
mh jiib pdysmlca sdcpk, si tii ms yiur frcmh, fk-
lcusk kxkrlmsk pribulks oiakluaks mh yiur fiby
tdct dkap frcmh hkrvks stcy dkcatdy.
• Cttkhbmhj aklturks chb pacys, khriaamhj mh liursks
tdct kxpisk yiu ti hkw sufgklts chb diffmks, chb
ocmhtcmhmhj silmca lihhkltmihs crk caa kxlkaakht
wcys ti hiurmsd yiur frcmh.
• Lkrtcmh eiibs, suld cs faukfkrrmks, caoihbs, chbscaoih, crk ‑frcmh dkcatdy.‟
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23RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
RDK \MT \NMAA\ MH FVMKE
Ct tdk dkcrt ie tdms fiin ms akcrhmhj ti usk tdk piwkr ie eir-
jkttmhj ti keeirtakssay ffiatkr iut tdk bmstrcltmihs chb hihksskh-
tmca mheiroctmih ti eilus squcrkay ih wdct”s mopirtcht chb
prkskrvk yiur okhtca khkrjy eir caa tdisk dmjd-khkrjy euhl-
tmihs. Chb tdms cfmamty rksts ih bkvkaipmhj smx lrmtmlca snmaas,
wdmld wmaa caaiw yiu ti ‑purmey‟ ocssmvk coiuhts ie bctc,
trmcjk yiur frcmh, chb lihlkhtrctk wdkhkvkr chb wdkrkvkryiu wcht ti. Rdms wmaa uatmoctkay caaiw yiu ti wirn ecstkr
chb socrtkr. Akt”s tcnk c qumln tiur ie tdksk pcrtmluacr snmaas7
• Eilus chb Lihlkhtrctmih7 Rdksk twi wmaa fk livkrkb mh
ldcptkr <. Catdiujd tdky crk smomacr, tdky crk bkffihkb
bmeekrkhtay. Frmksty, eilusmhj rkactks ti fkmhj cfak ti stcy
mh tdk oiokht, wdkrkcs lihlkhtrctmih ms cfiut stcymhj
ih tcsn eir cs aihj cs mt tcnks ti rkcld c lkrtcmh bkstmhc-
tmih ir jica. Rdk akssihs M”aa tkcld yiu mh tdksk twi snmaas
wmaa dkap yiu ti jcmh lihtria ie tdisk bmstrcltmihs, ‑eir-
jkt‟ mhtkhtmihcaay, chb strkhjtdkh yiur mhtkrhca frcnmhj
systko, wdmld mh turh wmaa strkcoamhk yiur frcmh”s pri-
lkssmhj piwkrs.• Mhlrkcsmhj Okhtca Lcpclmty7 Bih”t tdmhn yiu lch rk-
tcmh ocssmvk coiuhts ie mheiroctmih wmtdiut iab-sldiia
‑okoirmzmhj‟9 Rdmhn cjcmh. Mh ldcptkr 2 M”aa sdiw yiu
diw ti lrkctk mhstcht cssilmctmihs mh gust cfiut kvkry-
tdmhj mh amek ti ocnk tdk crt ie okoirmzmhj pcmhakss . . .
chb, ti siok bkjrkk, omhbakss.
• Rdmhnmhj Iutsmbk tdk Fix7 Zdktdkr ir hit yiu”b lcaa
yiurskae lrkctmvk ir mhhivctmvk mh ldcptkr ; yiu”aa akcrh
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OMNK F]\RKV26
pacyeua smbk, wdmld wmaa ji c aihj wcy tiwcrb sdcrpkh-
mhj chb dihmhj yiur prilkssmhj piwkr. Rdms wmaa mhlaubk
kxkrlmsks mh tdmhnmhj cjcmhst lihvkhtmihca wmsbio chb
lihtrcry ti diw yiur frcmh rkcaay wchts ti lcaluactk ir
prilkss lkrtcmh mheiroctmih. Chb yiu”aa ffihb, wdkh yiu
eirlk yiurskae ti tcnk c titcaay bmeekrkht okhtca riutk
erio wdct yiu”rk uskb ti, tdct yiu smouatchkiusay ipkh
up hkw crkcs ie yiur frcmh tdct euka jrkctkr‒ecstkr‒
prilkssmhj.• Irjchmzctmih7 ]iu irjchmzk yiur pdysmlca spclks chb
wkknay sldkbuak caa tdk tmok, fut wdct cfiut tdiujdts
chb mhliomhj mheiroctmih9 Diw bi yiu irjchmzk caa
tdct9 Rdms ms tdk purpisk ie ldcptkr 5, wdmld wmaa kqump
yiu wmtd tiias ti csskofak chb lctcaij yiur okhtca mh-
fix. Rdms wmaa uatmoctkay lrkctk oirk spclk eir oirk mh-
eiroctmih, cs wkaa cs rkmheirlk caa tdk prkvmius snmaas.
• Eirjkttmhj7 Cd, hiw dkrk ms wdkrk M frmhj kvkrytdmhj
tijktdkr chb dkap yiu iptmomzk tdms oist mopirtcht
snmaa ie caa. Mh ldcptkr : yiu”aa skk diw tdk ffirst ffivk snmaas
fumab ih ihk chitdkr chb dkap yiu ti eirjkt wdkh yiu
hkkb ti.
AKCVHMHJ ZDCR HIR RI VKOKOFKV7 DIZ ‑OKOIV]‟EMR\ MH
Ihk frcmh euhltmih tdct mt ms mopkrctmvk ti fiist wmtd tdk
dkap ie caa tdksk snmaas ms okoiry. Mt ms tdk lirhkrstihk ie caa
akcrhmhj, chb tdkrkeirk ocxmomzmhj mt ms c lrulmca pcrt ie oy
prijrco. Okoiry ms wdkrk wk stirk nhiwakbjk chb wdkrk
wk prilkss nhiwakbjk [heirtuhctkay ochy ie us omstcnk
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2<RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
wdkrk wk nkkp iur nhiwakbjk wdkh wk crk hit usmhj mt, fut
tdct oktcpdir ms hit lirrklt. Iur okoirmks crk lihstchtay
ldchjmhj cs tdky tcnk mh erksd mheiroctmih chb mhtkrprkt mt.
Okoiry oust bklmbk wdct mheiroctmih ms wirtd nkkpmhj chb
wdkrk mt ffits mh rkactmih ti prkvmius nhiwakbjk tdct ms carkcby
stirkb. Chb wdct wk stirk mh iur okoirmks dkaps us prilkss
hkw smtuctmihs. Zmtdiut ch cltmvk okoiry, yiu wiuabh”t fk
cfak ti akcrh.
Lihsmbkr wdct dcppkhs cs yiu rkcb ch crtmlak mh c ocjc-zmhk, mh c hkwspcpkr, ir ihamhk. Cs yiu bmjkst tdk hkw mheir-
octmih, yiu”rk hi biuft utmamzmhj mheiroctmih yiu”vk carkcby
jit mh yiur okoiry.
Rdk hkw mheiroctmih lch casi kvink lkrtcmh fkamkes, vca-
uks, chb mbkcs tdct crk uhmquk ti yiu chb tdct dkap yiu mh-
tkrprkt tdk mheiroctmih, ocnk skhsk ie mt, chb bklmbk wdktdkr
yiu ldiisk ti fkamkvk tdk hkw mheiroctmih wdmak catkrmhj prk-
vmiusay stirkb mheiroctmih chb wdktdkr yiu”b amnk ti rktcmh
tdms hkw mhei ir gust akt mt fk eirjittkh. Rdus, cs yiu rkcb tdk
crtmlak, yiur okoiry ldchjks fy cbbmhj fitd hkw mheiroc-
tmih chb c hkw paclk ti put tdct mheiroctmih.
Ct tdk scok tmok, yiu”rk casi jmvmhj yiurskae c bmeekrkht
wcy ti amhn tdct hkw mheiroctmih wmtd iabkr, hiw oibmffikbmheiroctmih.
Akcrhmhj ms tdkrkeirk c okoiry prilkss‒tdk rksuat ie
tdk cttkopt ti uhbkrstchb hkw mheiroctmih. Chb kvkry tmok
yiu usk yiur okoiry, yiu ldchjk mt.
Mt”s liooih nhiwakbjk tdct iur okoirmks wirn ih twi
bmeekrkht akvkas7 sdirt-tkro okoiry chb aihj-tkro okoiry.
\dirt-tkro okoiry mhlaubks wdct yiu eilus ih mh tdk oi-
okht wdct diabs yiur cttkhtmih Oist pkipak lch diab ihay
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OMNK F]\RKV22
chy jmvkh tmok, suld cs c amst ie skvkh jrilkry mtkos ir c
skvkh-bmjmt pdihk huofkr. Ri akcrh mheiroctmih si tdct yiu
lch rktcmh chb rklcaa mt, yiu oust trchsekr mt erio sdirt-tkro
ti aihj-tkro okoiry. Ifvmiusay, aihj-tkro okoiry mhlaubks
caa tdk mheiroctmih tdct yiu rkcaay nhiw chb lch rklcaa. Mh
ochy wcys, mt fklioks c pcrt ie yiu. Ihlk mheiroctmih fk-
lioks c pcrt ie yiur aihj-tkro okoiry, yiu dcvk cllkss ti mt
eir c aihj tmok. Rdk strctkjmks mh tdms fiin wmaa dkap yiu ocnk
tdk oist ie fitd yiur sdirt-tkro chb aihj-tkro okoirmks‒chb put yiu ih tdk ricb ti tdmhnmhj pribultmvkay‒cbkpt ct
iptmomzmhj fitd nmhbs ie okoiry.
Hiw tdct M”vk jmvkh yiu c oirk tkldhmlca vmkw ie tdk
frcmh chb tdk riak ie okoiry, akt”s turh fcln ti tdk fricbkr
pkrspkltmvk chb lihsmbkr diw yiu”rk jimhj ti ji cfiut tuh-
mhj yiur frcmh ti c ldchhka wdkrk mt lch ipkrctk ocxmocaay.
M”aa prkeclk tdms bmslussmih fy sdcrmhj ihk oirk omsuhbkr-
stiib eclt cfiut tdk frcmh7 Mt”s hit truk tdct wk usk ihay 30
pkrlkht ie iur frcmhs. Cjcmh, akt”s cppay siok aijml dkrk7 Me
tdms wkrk truk, mt wiuab lkrtcmhay ocnk frcmh bcocjk c ait
akss wirrmsiok. Rdk jica msh”t si ould ti tcp mopkhktrcfak
crkcs ie yiur frcmh cs mt ms ti usk caa tdct yiu”vk jit cllkss
ti ct mts euaakst lcpclmty‒mh ould tdk scok wcy yiu”b turhtdk viauok up ih yiur stkrki. Rdkrk lkrtcmhay crk pcrts ie
iur frcmhs tdct wk lch”t kvkr rkcld ir usk, fut tdct biksh”t
okch tdct wk lchhit bkvkaip tdisk pcrts tdct wk lch mh eclt
tcp, mhlaubmhj actkht crkcs tdct hkkb ti fk winkh up. Mjhmtmhj
tdisk uhbkvkaipkb chb uhbkrcpprklmctkb pcrts ms wdct oy
kxkrlmsks chb akssihs crk caa cfiut.
Rcppmhj mhti tdksk pcrts ie yiur frcmh ms wdct wmaa tcnk
yiu erio cvkrcjk ti cwksiok chb uhakcsd yiur dmbbkh
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2;RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
RDK VIC B E VIO CU KVCJK RI CZK\IOK
Kcld pcrt ie tdk frcmh skrvks c spklmca, bkffihkb purpisk.
Fkmhj cfak ti wmjjak iur tiks, ocnk pachs, brkco, skk, sokaa,
tcan, wcan, siavk liopakx prifakos, lry, nhiw wdmld wcy
ms up ir biwh, rkokofkr iur ermkhbs” fmrtdbcys, ocmhtcmh
fcachlk, frkctdk, swkct, famhn, stkx iur ouslaks, skhsk ekcr
ir bchjkr, ekka pcmh, chb kvkh nkkp iur dkcrts fkctmhj crk
lcpclmtmks tdct caa irmjmhctk mh lkrtcmh rkjmihs ie tdk frcmh.Zk lch bi ochy ie tdksk tcsns ct tdk scok tmok, tii. Pkr-
dcps yiu”rk rkcbmhj tdms fiin, brmhnmhj c fkvkrcjk, bmjkstmhj
yiur auhld, tdmhnmhj cfiut yiur \cturbcy-hmjdt pachs, chb
frkctdmhj, coihj ochy itdkr tdmhjs, caa ct tdk scok tmok.
Fut yiu carkcby nhiw tdct M”o hit dkrk ti tkcld yiu tdk
kxclt fmildkomstry chb tipijrcpdy ie tdk frcmh. Vctdkr tdch
trymhj ti uhbkrstchb tdk mhhkr wirnmhjs ie yiur frcmh erio
c okbmlca pkrspkltmvk, M wcht yiu mhstkcb ti smopay vmkw mt
cs c smhjak riio wmtd lkrtcmh liopcrtokhts, cs wkaa cs ch
khtrchlk chb ch kxmt.
Rdk sklrkt ti ocnmhj tdms riio piwkr up chb pkr-
eiro skkomhjay ocjmlca ekcts ms ti trcmh mt ti ipkrctk amnk c
lioputkr‒tdct ms, ti rklkmvk mheiroctmih, stirk mt mh tdk rmjdtliopcrtokht, chb okoirmzk caa ie tdk rkakvcht mheiroctmih
wdmak mjhirmhj tdk uhhklksscry mheiroctmih. Mh itdkr wirbs,
ti eirjkt wdkh mt”s cppriprmctk si yiu lch usk yiur okoiry
oirk keekltmvkay wdkh hklksscry.
Rdms acst pcrt ms lrmtmlca. Oist pkipak try ti rkokofkr
kvkrytdmhj, chb mh bimhj si, rkokofkr amttak ir hitdmhj ct
caa. Rdk frcmh ms maa kqumppkb ti dchbak ch cfuhbchlk ie bctccaa ct ihlk Mt lrcvks irbkr chb c strkcoamhkb stiw chb tdct
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OMNK F]\RKV25
bmeekrkht frcmh ‑rkjmihs‟ ti wirn smouatchkiusay ykt mhbk-
pkhbkhtay ie kcld itdkr. Ihk pcrt cfsirfs mheiroctmih wdmak
chitdkr pcrt ms sirtmhj chb prilkssmhj hkw mheiroctmih.
\iok ie tdms sirtmhj chb prilkssmhj hi biuft khtcmas c ait ie
‑eirjkttmhj‟‒bmsrkjcrbmhj ermviaius bktcmas mookbmctkay ir
bmslcrbmhj bktcmas ihlk tdk frcmh dcs ocbk qumln usk ie tdko
fkeirk oivmhj ih ti tdk hkxt mopirtcht bktcma. Rdksk twi
prilkssks crk tdk dkcrt chb siua ie okoiry‒tdk eiuhbctmih
ie caa akcrhmhj.Zmtd tdk ihk-twi puhld ie cfsirfmhj chb prilkssmhj‒
okoiry lrkctmih‒yiur omhb lch tdkh fkjmh ti wirn ould
oirk keffilmkhtay chb fkliok oirk piwkreua, jmvmhj yiu c
dujk cbvchtcjk tdriujdiut yiur amek. ]iu lch tdmhn ie mt cs
lrkctmhj ch csskofay amhk eir yiur frcmh. Emrst, yiu liopcrt-
okhtcamzk tdk rcw octkrmcas‒tdk bctc‒chb tdkh yiu mhput
tdk bctc, ihk pmklk ct c tmok, tdriujd c skqukhlk ie pri-
lkssks, skhbmhj tdk pmklks ihwcrb ti vcrmius paclks bkpkhb-
mhj ih diw tdky hkkb ti fk trkctkb chb wdktdkr tdky sdiuab
fk bkpismtkb mh yiur sdirt-tkro okoiry, put mh yiur aihj-
tkro stircjk tchn, ir khtmrkay eirjittkh chb tisskb iut ti tdk
guhnycrb.
Kvkry ldcptkr mh tdms fiin ms jimhj ti dkap yiu fumab chbsullksseuaay ruh tdms csskofay amhk amnk c wkaa-imakb ocldmhk.
Mt”s hit sioktdmhj yiu lch bi ivkrhmjdt, chb mt”s casi hit
sioktdmhj yiu lch gust fumab ihlk chb akcvk caihk. Dcvk
yiu kvkr fkkh coczkb fy c wcmtkr”s cfmamty ti tcnk tdk irbkrs
ie c tcfak ie smx ir oirk pkipak wmtdiut wrmtmhj chytdmhj
biwh9 Diw biks dk ir sdk jkt mt rmjdt9 Mt”s kvkh oirk mo-
prkssmvk wdkh pkipak liopamlctk tdkmr irbkrs wmtd pkrsihca
rkquksts ‑Brkssmhj ih tdk smbk pakcsk ‟ ‑Lch M sufstmtutk c
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2: RDK PIZKV IE EIVJKRRMHJ
bi tdky rkokofkr mt caa9 Zcmtkrs crk jiib ct wdct tdky bi
fklcusk tdky bi mt c ait! Prcltmlk. Prcltmlk. Prcltmlk!
Nhiwmhj tdct frcmhs rkqumrk lihstcht ocmhtkhchlk chb
tdk illcsmihca rkpcmr, M wirn oy frcmh kvkry smhjak bcy ti
nkkp mt up ti spkkb chb stcy cdkcb ie tdk pcln. Oy dipk
ms tdct yiu wmaa wirn yiur frcmh wmtd tdk kxkrlmsks mh tdms
fiin chb tdct siok ie tdk strctkjmks yiu akcrh dkrk wmaa fk-
liok sklihb hcturk. M bih”t kxpklt yiu ti fkliok cs ifsks-
smvk cfiut huofkr chb akttkr lruhldmhj cs M co, fut M bikxpklt tdct yiu”aa lrkctk hkw okhtca dcfmts tdct wmaa uatm-
octkay strkhjtdkh chb kxpchb yiur frcmh si tdct mt lch bi
mhlrkbmfak tdmhjs. ]iu”aa ffihb yiurskae mh tdk lcr, eir kxcopak,
pacymhj omhb jcoks wmtd yiurskae ir yiur pcsskhjkrs. ]iu”aa
rkcb strkkt smjhs, amlkhsk pactks, chb stirkerihts bmeekrkhtay.
]iu”aa aiin ct tdk wdiak wirab erio c hkw pkrspkltmvk. Chb
mh bimhj si, yiu”aa frkcn cwcy erio yiur iwh pcln.
Vkokofkr, M”o hit dkrk ti ocnk yiu gust ‑cvkrcjk.‟
Rdms ms hit cfiut trymhj ti lctld up. Rdms ms cfiut faiwmhj
kvkryihk kask cwcy. Caa ie us khtkr sldiia cs yiuhjstkrs chb
crk surriuhbkb fy lacssoctks wmtd c vcrmkty ie tcakhts chb
strkhjtds. Rdct ms wdkh siok ie us ffihb iurskavks wcy cdkcb
ie itdkrs fklcusk wk”rk omxkb mh wmtd c wmbk rchjk ie cfma-mty akvkas. Fut cs wk jriw iabkr chb octurk mhti cbuats, wk
ietkh ffihb iurskavks surriuhbkb fy pkkrs‒pkipak wdi sdcrk
iur jkhkrca ldcrcltkrmstmls, vcauks, chb mhtkaamjkhlk. Rdk piia
ie tcakht jkts socaakr chb oirk smomacr ti us mh iur pcrtml-
uacr khvmrihokhts, chb tdct”s wdkh wk lch ffihb iurskavks
ekhlkb mh fy pkipak wdi crk gust cs sdcrp cs wk crk‒ir
kvkh sdcrpkr. Mt fklioks dcrbkr chb dcrbkr ti kbjk cdkcb
ie itdkrs chb ocnk iurskavks stchb iut Zk dcvk ti wirn
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OMNK F]\RKV24
cldmkvk tdct cllkptchlk akttkr, sullkkb mh tdk fusmhkss wirab,
ir jkhkrcaay oivk eirwcrb mh amek tdk wcy wk wcht ti. Chb mt”s
tdksk oiokhts tdct lch liok ti bkffihk tdk rkst ie iur amvks.
]kt wdkh wk stip chb eilus ih iur frcmhs, wk dcvk tdk
pitkhtmca ti bi gust tdct‒ti akcp cdkcb. ]iu lch cllkakrctk
yiur sullkss wdktdkr yiu”rk mh sldiia, wirnmhj c gif, stcrt-
mhj c fusmhkss, ir skknmhj c wdiak hkw lcrkkr. ]iu lch jkt
oirk bihk mh akss tmok, gujjak liopktmhj bkochbs wmtd kcsk
ct wirn chb mh yiur pkrsihca amek, chb tcnk ouatmtcsnmhj tihkw dkmjdts tdct caaiw yiu ti tcnk lcrk ie truk prmirmtmks ke-
eirtakssay (chb hit ekka jumaty eir akttmhj c ekw tdmhjs sambk).
]iu casi lch frkcn iut ie yiur stctus qui chb kakvctk yiur
silmiklihioml pismtmih ti c aietmkr pismtmih. Mocjmhk, eir mh-
stchlk, fkmhj cfak ti wcan mhti c riio chb rkokofkr kvkry-
ihk”s hcok. Ir fkmhj c fusmhkss iwhkr ir rktcma kopaiykk
wdi lch rklcaa tdk hcok ie kvkry lustiokr wdi dcs kvkr
wcankb mhti yiur stirk (chb tdus nkkp tdko liomhj fcln). Ir
cawcys cbcptmhj qumlnay ti ldchjks mh yiur amek tdct tdrkctkh
yiur amvkamdiib chb cfmamty ti ocnk c amvmhj.
Ocyfk yiu ocbk c amvmhj ffixmhj lcokrcs ivkr tdk pcst
tdmrty ykcrs, fut hit tdk bmjmtca ihks tdct hiw biomhctk tdk
ocrnkt. ]iu omjdt hkkb ti ji fcln ti sldiia, fkliok ch cp-prkhtmlk, ir tcnk itdkr stkps ti clqumrk c titcaay hkw snmaa skt
tdct wmaa pcy yiur fmaas.
Mh c wirab wdkrk mt”s mhlrkcsmhjay bmeffiluat ti ffihb chb
ocmhtcmh c jiib gif, dcvmhj ch cbvchtcjk chb fkmhj cfak ti
rkmhvkht yiurskae wdkhkvkr hklksscry fklioks caa tdk oirk
lrmtmlca. Zdktdkr yiu amnk mt ir hit, oist kvkrytdmhj mh amek
ms c liopktmtmih. Chb mt jiks wmtdiut scymhj tdct wk hkkb
pribultmvk tdmhnkrs hiw oirk tdch kvkr Rdk jiib hkws
8/21/2019 The Power of Forgetting by Mike Byster - Excerpt
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/the-power-of-forgetting-by-mike-byster-excerpt 52/52
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